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dolphinxx
2nd February 2006, 11:52 AM
Hope you like this guys:

Zara: The Life Of A Cheetah


Chapter One

It was the dawning of a new hero. And not the average hero to be exact. Little did she know, she would grow up be known among the whole of Africa. The animals, that is.6-year-old Zara lay motionless in the tall savannah grass, snuggling next to her 3 cubs. Zara was a cheetah. Looking at the stars she relaxed taking in the peacefulness when she hear the grass rustle. Zara got up and crouched low. She kept her mind calm and relaxed. Slowly she slowly crept forward. The creature jumped and Zara sprang forward. It was a Thompson’s Gazelle. The creature ran for dear life. Zara was speeding at breakneck speed for the kill. Zara spotted an old, tall tree and stopped behind it. The frightened Gazelle stopped clueless. It relaxed its tense muscles and started to munch on the nearby grass. Zara crept out from behind the tree and neared the Gazelle. Using all her stealth, Zara moved slowly behind the creature. The Gazelle looked up, and Zara spotted her chance. She jumped and landed next to the Gazelle. SWIPE! BITE! Zara bit into the helpless Gazelle and dragged it back to the camp of the sleeping kittens.



The next day the baby cheetahs awoke to the lovely smell of fresh breakfast. The kittens dug in to the Thompson’s Gazelle caught by their mother last night. Once they had had enough the wandered over to their sleeping mother. Zara awoke sleepily and walked over to get her share of breakfast. Whilst she was eating, the kittens were over playing in the old tree. 15 minutes pasted and Zara had eaten plenty. She walked over to kittens and told them it was time for hunting lessons.



The kittens, slightly wanting to stay at the tree and play, followed their mum for the first day of the all-important matter: Hunting. The 4 Cheetahs soon arrived at the open grassland. Zara, excited by her young’s first lesson, led them to a rabbit hole. She let out a high pitch growl and waited. Suddenly rabbits started pouring out of the hole. The youngest kitten, Kitty, just didn’t know what to do and ran a couple of meters away. The 2nd to youngest, Kartalama, slowly chased after a rabbit, unsure. The oldest kitten, Kalas, sped along, practically flying after the rabbit. Soon enough he caught it and brought it back to his awaiting mother. Kitty just quietly sat by her mum and brother, waiting for her sister to get back. Awhile later, Kartalama arrived back with a deep scratch on her face. It was getting dark and the sunset upon Africa. Zara hurried her kittens back to their campsite for she knew what had attacked Kartalama. A Hyena.


It was a long night for Zara. She didn’t get hardly any sleep, thinking about the Hyenas. Finally the sun rose. The sky was dashed with pink, orange and blue. Zara just lay there. Eventually she fell asleep. She dreamed a terrible dream. The Hyenas came and killed her kittens and then killed her. She awoke at midday by the sounds of her kittens meowing. Zara awoke slowly and went off to catch some food. While their mother was gone the kittens chased each other about. Except Kitty. She just hung around campsite till their mother got back. The reason for kitty not joining in is because she was adopted. Her mother died so Zara looks after her. Kitty feels like she doesn’t fit in. After what seemed like an eternity to the cubs, their mother finally got back and she brought some shocking news with her.



They were going to have to move camps. The Hyenas were fast approaching and Zara thought it was for the best and the cub’s safety that they moved. The kittens and their mother ate breakfast in silence, knowing that this would be their last meal at their current camp. Once they had finished eating they stared to move. The headed south till nightfall. It was a long day so they all decided to make camp. Everyone fell fast asleep in no time because of the tiring walk today. They awoke to the beautiful sunrise. When everyone was awake they all felt a sudden need for a drink. The kittens followed their mother while she tried to find a water hole. After hours of searching they finally stumbled against a very small one. All four cheetahs thirstily drank. It was now after lunch and Zara could smell meat. The kittens followed eagerly as their mum hunted down the meat. She soon stumbled against a piece of meat lying on the ground. She bit into it and got the surprise of her life. A net trapped her and she rose into the air. The rope attached to the enclosed net was hanging from a tree. The kittens spotted a car nearby. 2 men stepped out of the car and got the net down from the tree. Zara wriggled franticly but it was no use. “ Stop squirming” yelled one of the men. He threw the bag to the ground and pulled a tranquilizer gun out from his boot. The kittens darted behind a big patch of grass. Zara even more frightened squirmed even more. “ Alright, You asked for it,” growled one of the men. He aimed the gun and the dart went straight into Zara’s body. She automatically stopped squirming and lay there motionless. They threw the her into the back of their car. The car zoomed of into the distance. All the kittens could do was watch as there mum speed away. They felt helpless. But even more shattered.


What do u think? Chapter 2 coming soon

Dolphinxx~;212;~;157;

The Others
6th February 2006, 3:48 AM
that was pretty good. a note of thumb when writing, most people spell out the numbers, a bit more attractive. But I must say that was rele good. =)

-ShinyArticuno49001

dolphinxx
6th February 2006, 6:30 AM
Ooo. thanx. will do. Thanx so much

Exel 4.0
10th February 2006, 12:26 AM
A bit short for a chapter. Try revising it a bit, put in some dialogue (this requires personification), split your paragraphs up, and make it longer. If this is a first time, then its pretty good. Just don't get too confident.

dolphinxx
10th February 2006, 8:12 AM
thanx will do right away

dolphinxx
15th February 2006, 7:29 AM
sorry to double post but wat does personification mean? Anywho i just edited it. hope u like it

Dolphinxx~

KaMaKaZi
18th February 2006, 4:31 PM
well i think it was good
i hope it turns out good!

dolphinxx
19th February 2006, 1:44 AM
Thanx. i just cant think of wats gonna happen next!

dolphinxx
22nd April 2006, 11:03 AM
Hello Fellow Members. I know what to write about. YAY!!!!! Ill post it soon