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idc47
16th May 2006, 8:32 AM
Note: All these comic sprites were made and created by me, so no stealing my work. If you want a scene in your sig, PM me. Please Rate.
http://img159.imageshack.us/img159/1714/stroy10gw.png
Prologue^
http://img159.imageshack.us/img159/7085/story1cont1iq.png
Scene 1^

Alphonse Elric
16th May 2006, 9:55 AM
It's a good comic and all, but unfortunately you managed to put it in the wrong section. This really belongs in the Fan-Comics (http://www.serebiiforums.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&daysprune=&f=114) Section. But what the hey, I'll comment on it since it'll obviously take time before it gets moved to the proper section.

Comments:

- Okay, in the first box, the map clearly shows that there is no space behind Professor Oak's Pokémon Laboratory. How come there is suddenly a large space that appears behind the Lab in Box 3?

- In the second box, it says that Isaiah was born in 1989. So that must mean he's 16 going on 17. Isn't that age a little too old for a Pokémon Trainer? I mean, they're usually 10-12 years old, aren't they?

- Same comment for Rusty.

- In Box 3, why is the Cycling Road building in there?

- And the way you made Rusty get the Charmander... Is it purposedly so that Isaiah could win against him by using Squirtle, or is it to imply that Rusty's Charmander will evolve into a Charizard and Rusty will be a noob?

Bandana
16th May 2006, 10:12 AM
Wow! Its good! I wish I could create comics......
Anyway good work and its great to see some individuality since you didn't speech bubbles.
Hope all goes well but what Phoenix Wright said, aren't they a bit old?