View Full Version : sins of history

29th June 2006, 3:00 PM
*this is my first fan fiction so forgive me if this is either dull or it is not flavorful...
RATING:g-general audience

;384; ;383; ;382; Sins of History;379; ;377; ;378;

setting: ancient hoenn
time: the beginning

as written from the alpha plate found in the cave of origin:

In the time before time, as the world was just born, two pokemon were delivered unto the earth. The two titanic pokemon had very distinct abilities and strengths. The earth titan gave shape to the land and the sea titan gave form to the waters. This went on for a while until the two met. They eyed each other with hatred and began to fight. Their battle raged on and as they fought, the world shook and heaved. As their cataclysmic battle continued, the world came to be more and more but it also was on the verge of destruction by the two opposing powers. Suddenly, a light appeared in the sky and another pokemon was born into the world. The sky pokemon rushed at the two and calmed their angry spirits. The titans gave up their battle and settled down in their separate domains. The land beast made its lair in the place now known as Terra Cave and the ocean titan came to rest in the Marine Cave. The sky dragon still circles the world and appears if the need arises. The names of these legendary pokemon are GROUDON, KYOGRE and RAYQUAZA. - the ancient people of sootopolis, 5690 old era(o.e.)

as written on the beta plate found in the ruins located near Pacifidlog:

The events of severe tragedy transpired like this: the ancient tribes that descended from the ancient ones of sootopolis settled down down in three areas of the new world. The western tribe, the northern tribe and the southern tribe each experienced their own horrors and losses. The three tribes were each engrassed by their surrounding elements and thus mastered the artsof utilizing of rock, ice and steel. Then, the worst happened. Each tribe tried to create an avatar of their mastered element...and they succeeded. At hirst they thought it was a great triumph and they rejoiced, not knowing what kind of monstrosities they had unleashed upon the world. Then the three new pokemon proceeded to destroy the towns of their creators and masacre many cities. The people, realizing their mistake, froced the avatars back away from their dwellings and into caves and they were sealed away. The ancient ones then sealed the keys to the prisons in a tomb under the sea. Swearing to never seek the monsters again, they left and began their lives anew. They names given to the avatar pokemon are REGIROCK, REGICE and REGISTEEL. - ancient historian of Pacifidlog

Setting: a room somewhere in Lilycove City, present day Hoenn

A man sits at a table, his face barely visible. He is seriously displeased about the progress his followers have made within the passed few years. "All I ask is that you find me the legendary keys, is that so much to ask for? Is it>" he asks the three admins infront of him.

"Sir, don't you think that you are going too far with this fantasy about the super pokemon? I mean, they were only legends..." starts the most senior of the admins.

"Just legends, my dear? You of all people should know that these are not JUST legends. These pokemon are powerful and unbeatable! We could rule the world with them! You all have read the alpha and beta plates. You can't just say they are wrong!" thundered the boss. The three shivered in there shoes. The boss was very terrifying when he was in an obssessive mode. "All you have to do is find the last plate, the gamma plate. That is what we need! With that we can unlock the secrets of the ultimate power!Hahahaha!...WELL!? What are you three doing? Get a move on!" finished the boss as he shooed them out. "Don't return without that plate!"

The admins had no other choice but, as they said to one another when they exited the building, they would have to get that plate no matter what, for their sakes...
__________________________________________________ _______________
Chapter one soon to follow! ;)

Leon Phelps
21st July 2006, 1:11 AM
chrisivy... do you not pay attention to the time stamps? This. thread. is. old. Judging by your last attempts at fanfiction, take your own advice please.

I'm not really sure if I should review this or not but whatever...

Setting: a room somewhere in Lilycove City, present day Hoenn
That showed how lazy you were when you wrote this. Laziness that shows is annoying. Please describe the settings. You used "somewhere". What in the Hell is "somewhere"? I'll spare you any witty comments because I'm in a good mood.

In the time before time
*quietly chuckles to himself...* When you try to sound all mysterious and ominous, try making sense first.

setting: ancient hoenn
What the flip is "Ancient Hoenn"? I'm new to Pokemon. I don't know anything. I noticed that you hardly capitolize where you are supposed to be. Don't you know what a proper noun is? If not, Google it. I'm lazy.

This was terribly short and I can tell that you rushed to post this for God knows what reason. Da rulez sez to have it at least a page unless you have a chapter to go along with it. But since I doubt that you're planning another chapter(time stamp) I won't waste my time anymore.

~Leon P.

21st July 2006, 10:49 PM
Why is it called sins of history?

12th August 2006, 4:07 AM
This seems like you planning it out while your writing. See what I mean?