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Artugia
5th July 2006, 9:24 AM
This is my first fan-fic.

15yrs PLUS!!!

Strong Sexual Themes, coarse language, etc.
This is just a paragraph to get a taste of 'Greg's Life'.

Greg woke up to the stench of his own body odour. He climed out of bed and checked himself out in the mirror. He loved his body, it was quite developed as he was 15. Looking at his own muscles turned him on. He attemped to pull on his jeans, but felt an urge..he stroked his penus gently. He was startled when his sister barged in the door, and stared with her mouth wide open at his erected underwear...

Yami Ryu
5th July 2006, 11:04 AM
........

I laugh at you. No. The world laughs at you.

I, though I'm not a prude or anything, a person that doesn't like using the tech terms for a womans or mans privates- KNOW HOW TO SPELL IT RIGHT. It's penis. Dingbat :/ instantly I suspect you are not 15. You have had no sexual education, and are some randy 10 year old that thinks writing B rate porn is alright here.

http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?t=96993 http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?t=19

Your mother wore army boots and your father smells of elderberries D<

er I mean

Go read the fecking rules and advice threads, you horn dog writer :/

Diddy
5th July 2006, 12:37 PM
I don't know if you was referring to monty python and the holy grail.

BUT if you were, it was 'your mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries, and I fart in your general direction' that always makes me laugh.

BUT if you weren't and just making a remark based off that then you can carry on and don't mind me. *whistles and walks away*

BTW i love the way you criticise peoples work. It's always funny to read.

Owneik
5th July 2006, 1:53 PM
Why this is the most engrossing tale I have ever read. Never in my many years of being a literature fanatic have I found paragraphs with such exquisite use of words. Dear god, this must be the best work I have ever seen.

Except for this bowl! Wow! It's so shiny! And beautiful! And look at the words on the side..."For Mary." My lord! What a cliffhanger! Who is this Mary?! And what is it For?! DEAR GOD!



By now, I think you understand I'm high on life and sarcasm.

Zabi
5th July 2006, 2:56 PM
Why is this in Pokemon Fics, this should be in Non pokemon Fics.

Saffire Persian
5th July 2006, 5:37 PM
Oh. My. Goodness.

I think I'd seriously prefer reading all those little fics that are so stereotypical and flat because they actually have potential going. You, kid, do not. I think you should definitely check out the advice for aspiring authors and... from the very way the 'fic began alone, perhaps a psychologist.

Seriously, we shouldn't see any of this disgusting stuff in the forums. Even if you wanted to have "sexual" elements in your 'fics, this isn't the way to do it. Be tasteful, please. Keep in mind we also have kids wandering around the forums, and what you're writing certainly isn't something for even fifteen year olds to read. You also have no story or plot, and your "story" isn't a page long... which is what the rules say.

Please read the rules, it helps.

Jonouchi
5th July 2006, 6:31 PM
This is sick. DEFINETLY NOT 15+ Material. This is Adult Content, which isn't allowed here.

Along with the Rules and the Advice for Aspiring Authors. Read THIS!!! (http://www.fictionratings.com/guide.php)

Dias
5th July 2006, 6:37 PM
First of all, you can't just post a paragraph saying it's a 'taste' of what is to come. We have the author's cafe and preview threads for that. You post actual chapters here. This also isn't a Pokemon fic so it's in the wrong section. In the rules sticky in the author's cafe there is also a guidline for rating fics; G, PG, PG-13, R, NC-17. Plus, if a fic has scenes of detailed or graphic sex (which I can only assume), it will either earn an R rating or not be permitted on these forums. As of now this looks nothing more like a smattering of pornographic writing, and Hell knows why you decided to post it on a Pokemon forum.