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Allyson
7th July 2006, 12:45 AM
;026; ;058; chapter1: ;026; why?

raichu is eatting a apple in a abaned tower;026; :........*remebers a day when she was a pichu at the wooden 2 story tower with her mom and dad.
they just ate a cocoanut , a 1ft tall ant walks up the tower raichu's partrents battle it and she didn't look.when she looked her parrents where dead and the ant was. and a ;058; walks up to her and beomes her gardien.*
i wish it never hapened.she said then she gos home and get's the mail." theres mail for me?*she opens it* eilte 5 has chosen you, go to the swamp at 6:00"it said*raichu looked at the clock, it said 6:00..she whent there*"raichu! you have to battle me 1st" a aliagator/dragon(kios) said "ok"she said

;026; vs ;160; / ;249; type(with no wings)

*;026; used in slow mostion takle and bounsed off the 400ft aliagtor and slid on the side on the ground*"owww!"then rai chu started glowing and a plastic bag like parishoot whent around her arms and she jumped and used thunder;026; on Kios and he lost "you won...and the ice dragon is the last you have 5 more battles"he said ;026; ;026; "but?" then Kios disapared as he said his next battle is here.;026; "...?what.
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thats chapter 1

Allyson's team:;251; ;380; ;025; ;381;

Dilasc
7th July 2006, 12:49 AM
Uh, what? Yea, this thread breaks rules, is cliche, and makes me almost want to shoot myself with an overdose of jelly glazed, chocolate doughnuts.

You better go read the Advice for Authors and Rules thread because you seriously need a ton of help.

Dias
7th July 2006, 12:52 AM
11) Do NOT use smilies instead of names in your fic, it has got to be one of the most annoying things imaginable. Fine in footnotes but for the love of cheese, NO in the mainstream fanfiction.

Not to mention the length also does not meet posted requirements. Read the rules and advice threads stickied at the top of this page and write something that adheres to the guidelines before posting again.