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[Cano]
2nd August 2005, 8:50 AM
Well here's something like a prologue. It's my first fan fic, but don't go easy on me, or anything. I can take any criticism or anything else you throw at me. I have only two rules:

1. If you view, please review, even if you think it's craptacular and you'll never read it again.
2. NO SPAM!

The Following is my Chapter Set-up when I post:


[Chapter Rating] <- Consists of Rt (Reading teen) followed by the appropriate age group.
Here is where I elaborate on my reasons for the rating.


Chapter Title

Text Here

Text Here
-------------------------------------------------------------------------- <- Time gap

Text Here

Text Here
************************************************** ******* <- End of Chapter
Closing Notes Here
Closing Notes Here

Chapter END


Next Time: Following Chapter Name
Preview From Chapter

[Cano]



Well enough beating around the bush. Here it is:
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[Rt-G]
This chapter contains nothing that might offend the general audience.

Invisible Silhouette: A Pokemon Story

Location: Fire Region (Fuego)
Trainer Info: Sig Cloud Mugen, known to everyone as “Cloud”
Current Age: 9
Height: 4 feet 8 inches
Birth date: Summer, 2nd month, 17th day
Birth place: Cinnabar Island, Kanto Region
Siblings: unknown
Known Relations: Annette S. Mugen (mother)
Chase C. Mugen (father)

Trainer Back Story:
Born in Kanto, Cloud was raised on the Island of Cinnabar. He was born nearly a year before the incident that crippled the once great Island, and now lives in the great Fire Region, known as Fuego with his mother and father. As a result, he grew up with no knowledge of Kanto, its people or its pokémon. He knows only the stories he was told while listening to the Hoothoots sing their nocturnal lullaby. Stories of powerful trainers, mysterious pokémon, and beautiful towns and cities filled his dreams.

He grew up in a region filled to the brim with all kinds of pokémon, pokémon of all shapes and sizes, except the pokémon native to Kanto. Pokémon like Charmander and Dragonite were foreign to him. When told about them he could only imagine what they looked like; and he had a very wild imagination, being very young. But pokémon like Cyndaquil and Sentret, along with Hoothoot and Stantler surrounded him in his new home.

His life, though altered by fate, was a pleasant one filled with joy and laughter, rarely affected by hardship. Until that day when it all changed and all of the laughter and joy stopped. It was one his 6th birthday when they came, a powerful new crime organization, by the name of Silhouette; a group of villains lead by a mysteriously powerful figure, out to enslave all pokémon. They viewed them as tools of destruction and mayhem, not as friends or allies. They gave themselves their name because of their ability to blend in with everyone; you never could tell who was a Shadow and who wasn’t. Almost as if they didn’t even know they were apart of this powerful syndicate. Rumors spread that a new kind of pokémon was used to brain wash potential Shadows, and “activate” them at pivotal times. There was no pattern to their attacks, no reason, they just happened. The soldiers for Silhouette were called Shadows because of how quickly they changed; their personalities, their features, their appearances, everything, like they were a different person, a shadow of their former selves.

They appeared on Cloud’s birthday, his worst one ever, and the worst day in the history of Fuego. They appeared from what seemed like nowhere, and kidnapped many people and pokémon. One of those people was Cloud’s mother. She was taken away trying to save her son. And though everyone told him it wasn’t his fault, he knew it was, because of what one of the Shadows told him.

He had said, “The Boss has plans for you. It seems that there is potential in you…potential he wants to extort.”

For the next three years, he grew up without a mother, holding the guilt inside him, and trusting no one.

Here is where his adventure begins…***********************
This fic is based on my ideas for a new pokemon game. It'll be re-posted them in the Future Game Ideas thread after I proofread and add to them. Chapter 1 is close to being finished, just some touch ups and an ending and it'll be done, though I can't guarantee when it'll be up. So what do y'all think?

Prologue END


Next Time: The Fire Inside
“Well Cano, this is it. I’m not going to be coming back for a while. I’ll miss you,” he told the giant pokémon, hugging it tightly. “Oh, and take care of dad while I’m gone, ok?”

“Ar-roo, argh,” Cano growled in understanding.

Patting Cano on the head once more, he made his way toward Verd Forest. Suddenly he made a 180° turn and began to skate backwards while watching the small figures that were Scyko and Cano become smaller and smaller. Making a sharp 180, he picked up speed and soon reached the edge of the forest. He stopped abruptly and surveyed the forested carefully, taking in every detail.


[Cano]

[Cano]
3rd August 2005, 2:43 PM
Well, here's the first chapter, I got kinda lazy due to the lack of an audience, but here it is, hope whoever reads this enjoys it:
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[Rt-G]
This chapter contains nothing that may offend the general audience.

The Fire Inside

Today was the day his 9th birthday. Cloud waited three long years for this day to come, the day when he would truly become a Pokémon Trainer and get his very first pokémon from Professor Redwood. He woke up bright and early today, and got dressed quickly; there was no way he was going to be late today. He grabbed his pokébelt, his red flame cap, and his backpack and headed toward the door.

“Hold on there son. Where do you think you’re going-?”

“Dad, I told you, I’m getting my first pokémon today, remember?” Cloud complained.

“But, you woke up real early. In fact, you’re an hour ahead of everyone else,” his dad pointed out, as if this were enough of an excuse to keep his son from leaving.

“Dad, you know how it is: first come, first serve. I just wanna make sure I get to pick a good one,” he explained heatedly. There was the presence of annoyance in his voice; he had wanted to get there with at least fifteen minutes to spare, and his destination it wasn’t exactly down the street. Professor Redwood lived in the most secluded city in Fuego: Barden City, which was the next city over. While Cloud and his father, lived in the famous Hyd City.

The only problem was the forest between Barden and Hyd: Verd Forest. This particular forest was famous for is bounty of kind and gentle pokémon…But had been three years ago, back when silhouette’s only meaning was the one found in a dictionary. But since then, it had earned a different reputation; a dark and shady one. Rumors had spread that people who entered that forest were never seen again. Some believed it to be one of the Obscured. This was the name given to a location where innocent people were taken to become Shadows. This would explain way Barden wasn’t as popular as Hyd.

They were once known as sister cities, Barden and Hyd. Barden was famous for the findings of the Professor. It was he who had discovered the first signs of new and undocumented pokémon, such as Tundras and its pre-evolutions. He is known to many as “The Next Gen”, which meant "next generation", and "next genius". He had earned this nick name by discovering these new pokémon, which many called “the Fourth Generation”. Hyd, capital of Fuego, is a very populated metropolis, famous because it is home to the region’s prized Pokémon Gym. It was prized because its Leader’s specialty is Fire-types the type loved above all others in this particular region.

But just as everything else had changed three years ago, so did The Sisters of Fuego. Silhouette cast a long shadow over Fuego; a shadow which unfortunately seemed to stem near Barden for the past year and a half. Nothing was known for sure though, but regardless, something fishy was going on down there. And Chase’s 9-year old son was heading there…alone. This was more than enough of an excuse to try and prevent him from leaving. After all, Cloud was only 9 years old and not nearly capable enough to look after himself efficiently…or so he thought.

But that was where Chase was wrong. Cloud was more than capable, and for his age, very mature and understanding. Plus, he was determined and stubborn like his mother. Chase saw this and smiled with the realization that Cloud was in fact, capable; possibly even more capable than his old man.

“Well, seeing as you’re leaving, I got something for you. Wait just a minute,” he said, his voice trailing behind him as he walked toward the den area.

“It is, after all your birthday. You didn’t think that I wouldn’t give you a present, did you?”

Cloud laughed at himself, because he did think that, but he wouldn’t tell his father that. He approached his father and looked straight up at him. He was a tall fellow, standing at five feet and eleven inches, with messy jet black hair. He was thin and somewhat stringy, and wore a red shirt with vertical yellow lines in the pattern. He also wore black shorts that stopped above his knees, and wooden sandals that looked more appropriate on a samurai than him; and Cloud looked very little like his father.

Cloud stood only four feet eight inches tall; his hair was a pure milky white, and wasn’t nearly as messy as his father’s, but wasn’t what you’d call neat; he was thin and very athletic. And he style in clothing wasn’t anywhere near Chase’s. He wore a plain baseball shirt, with red sleeves and collar, and a grey front. The sleeves stopped several inches above his wrists. His shorts were black and jersey-like; it had hundreds of tiny wholes completely surrounding it, with an elastic waist, and three layers of the same material. On the bottom of the left legging was a logo of a pokéball with the letter “F” on it, covered in flames. For footwear he wore a pair of plain black shoes with white laces. He also wore a red flame cap, to hide his messy hair.
Yes, many didn’t believe that they were related, Cloud and Chase…At least not at first glance. They shared the same aura however, the same determination and strong will, the same fire in their eyes. Upon further inspection, you just knew they we’re father and son, not because of how they acted toward each other, but because of their personalities and attitudes. They were similar, yet different at the same time. That’s what set them apart, and to the same effect, made them alike.

But either way, Cloud admired and loved his father very much. He wanted nothing more than to follow in his father’s footsteps, and even surpass him. His father was once a great Pokémon Trainer. Cloud had heard many stories of his adventures throughout Kanto, and enjoyed them very much. Chase had once told him of the many pokémon he caught before Cloud was born. Sadly, he had released a large portion of them before leaving Kanto. He had done this because he had not wanted to take them from their home. He felt that they were just as smart as he, and that their feelings and opinions mattered just as much as his own.

But there were two that stayed with him: his Arcanine named Cano, a powerful, yet gentle pokémon, and his wise old Alakazam affectionately known as Scyko. These were the only ones left from his career as a Pokémon Trainer in Kanto, and acted as Cloud’s protective siblings growing up. Cano was a big dog-like pokémon, with yellow “Pikachu” fur all over his body, a yellowish fiery tail and chest and mane. Black zigzagged stripes covered his body as well as fiery yellowish patches of hair on his ankles. He had evolved from Growlithe, the very first pokémon Chase had caught. Scyko however was a tall human-like pokémon. His eyes were mesmerizing and threatening all at once. His skin was a light blue, except for his chest, wrists and ankles, which were all grey and looked as if the were protective armor instead of skin. His face was unusual for a pokémon because of his long mustache and his long pointed ears. These pokémon were Chase’s best friends, and some of Cloud’s only family. He was a little saddened at this thought; his family was very important to him, and having lost his mother three years ago made him wary of leaving. But it had to be done…He must go…He had a promise to keep. Snapping back to reality he continued to stare at his father, waiting for his gift.

His father stared down at him, and pulled a wrapped box from behind him. He handed Cloud the brightly colored box with a smile. Cloud took the box into his hands, and began unwrap it revealing a plain brown box. At this sight he frowned slightly, but let his curiosity help him in opening the box. Inside the box was a pair of rusty red two wheeled rollerblades, with the words “Fire Flash” emblazoned on the sides covered in black flames.

“Wow! These are the new Fire Flashes! How’d you get these, I’ve been saving for months!” Cloud shrilled with excitement.

“No you haven’t! You’ve been spending your money on trainer gear!” his father laughed.

“Well, eventually I would’ve bought these, I mean it’s essential to buy some type of transportation, and bikes are way too expensive. But anyways, thanks a lot dad, I really appreciate it,” Cloud told him.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s the least I can do, to make sure you’re taken care of. Oh, I almost forgot, I have something else for you. Here.”

Chase reached into his pocket and gave his son 2,000Ţ. Cloud looked at the money with wide eyed shock and excitement; this was more money than he had ever held before. His father noticed his surprised expression and added, “This is only a start-up to add to whatever you’ve saved. And don’t worry, if you’ve inherited my fighting spirit, and quick thinking, there will definitely be more where that came from.”

Cloud looked at him as if he were joking and half-expected Chase to laugh in his face and take back well more than half of the money he had handed him.

More money? I couldn’t possibly see how I could have more money than this, he thought.

But time was running out and if he was going to make it to Prof Redwood’s on time, he’d have to get going now. So he thanked his father again, put on his Fire Flashes, and walked out the door. He stood on his stoop and looked around, taking in the sights of home one last time. In the yard was his father’s Arcanine and Alakazam; Cano lay on his back in the warm sun, while Scyko sat in midair, meditating, a light purple aura surrounding it.

His house was small, a cottage if you will. It was one floor with two bedrooms, a wrap around porch, and a rather large front yard, with a white picket fence surrounding the property. His property was inclined enough to roll a coin from the last step all the way to the road, but too flat to be called a hill. The road in front of their property stretched east and west. East led deeper into Hyd; the shops, markets, and Gym. To the west lay Verd Forest. Cloud was just about to take off, when he got sight of it. A sight that stirred something with him, something he thought he locked away a long time ago.
It was a garden that belonged to his mother. It was visible near the fence; he and his father took care of the many flowers there in honor of her.

Sometimes…It doesn’t really feel like she’s gone…Like she’s still here watching me, waiting for me to say some kind of magic word to make her reappear, he wondered hopefully and happily.

Just then he felt something cold and wet run down his face. He hadn’t cried in so long, that he forgot what tears felt like. Not because he was macho or anything like that, he had just never found reason to shed tears.

He wiped the tear from his face in anger.

But that’s not going to happen. She’s gone. GONE! And it’s my fault…I wasn’t able to protect her, he accused. …I’d better get going. No use shedding tears now…It won’t bring her back.

He took another look at the garden in the corner. Reluctantly he looked away and took a breath of fresh air. He was ready. Jumping from his stoop, he landed on his walkway and began to pick up speed, thanks to the incline of his front yard. He skated past Arcanine and Alakazam; both stopped their meaningful activities to wave as he passed. Cloud waved back smiling, but inside held a sad feeling in the pit of his stomach. The fence surrounding his house was fast approaching, so he switched his focus on the path ahead. Timing was very important, and he knew this all to well which is why when he was 3 yards away from the fence, he leapt into the air grabbing his feet behind him. He soared over the fence and into the road outside the perimeter, landing in the middle of the road.

Skidding to a stop, he surveyed the land around him; to his left was a long winding road deeper into town; to the right, the road ended abruptly, and gave way to Verd Forest. Suddenly a sharp wind brushed over Cloud, nearly knocking him over. Catching himself, he turned and noticed Cano by his side, a look of depression in his eyes. Cloud smiled at Cano, another tear falling from his eye. The next thing he saw was Cano’s large tongue licking his tear away. Laughing, he reached over to Cano’s head and pet him.

“Well Cano, this is it. I’m not going to be coming back for a while. I’ll miss you,” he told the giant pokémon, hugging it tightly. “Oh, and take care of dad while I’m gone, ok?”

“Ar-roo, argh,” Cano growled in understanding.

Patting Cano on the head once more, he made his way toward Verd Forest. Suddenly he made a 180° turn and began to skate backwards while watching the small figures that were Scyko and Cano become smaller and smaller. Making a sharp 180, he picked up speed and soon reached the edge of the forest. He stopped abruptly and surveyed the forested carefully, taking in every detail.

Blades don’t work well on grass, so I’ll have to stick to fallen branches and giant rocks, if I want to make it on time, he determined from his observations.

And with that he was off, grinding on a fallen branch into the dark forest.

Nothing will stop me! I will be the best trainer I can be, and I’ll never quit, no matter how badly the odds, I’ll keep on fighting. Even if I’m fighting a losing battle, I keep on fighting till I lose. This I swear, he promised himself.

He could feel the fire inside of him rage on, feeding on his determination, growing stronger and stronger as he rode on. And soon he was out of sight.

Scyko eyes were still fixed on the forest’s edge. He sat perfectly still looking at the dark forest, contemplating, searching. Cano appeared at his side and sat and stared.

“Alaka, ala,” Scyko muttered impatiently to Cano.

“Aroo?” Cano questioned quizzically.

Scyko sighed, and then proceeded to speak, “Alakazam. Alaka ala al, alakazam.”

“HA-RUU!?” Cano howled angrily.

Scyko nodded. Cano’s face cringed as he bared his teeth into a blood curdling growl, his eyes aflame with the fierce fire rage. Scyko raised a hand to Cano to calm him, and used Calm Mind. Almost instantly Cano’s growl became almost a low purr; the anger in his eyes replaced with a genuine calm, as if the fire had been doused with a Hydro Pump.

Removing his hand from Cano, he spoke once more, “Alaka al. Ala alaka alakazam.”

Cano nodded, shaking the effects of Calm Mind off. Then, turning to Scyko, Cano pressed his snout as close to Scyko’s as possible, and let out a low warning growl. Sweating profusely Scyko nodded quickly in agreement. Feeling his point had been made he removed his face from Scyko’s and bound off toward Verd Forest. Getting to his feet, Scyko brushed his shoulders and walked slowly toward the forest, each step feeling heavier than the last. A hint of anger came over him, but was soon replaced with tranquility. He stopped to use Recover and immediately felt his strength return to him. He was getting old, there was no stopping that, but thankfully he could always Recover and move on. He continued on toward the forest, and stopped again, for an idea struck him. Concentrating, he stared into the darkness of the forest. Suddenly he cocked his head and turned to his right, his eyes aglow. And then he was gone.

The yard was empty when the front door opened. Chase stepped outside and looked up and down his yard for his pokémon, but couldn't find them. He decided to go back inside, and had turned around ready to step in the doorway, when something inside him turned his attention toward the forest.

He gazed aimlessly wondering, What am I supposed to see?

But then laughed he at himself, as the pieces came slowly together.

“Take good care of him boys. He’s all we’ve got.”

************************************************** ***************************
I would like to give credit to SuicuneZ, for his Fakemon Tundras, and its pre-evos. Also:
http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/cano.png http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/scyko.png

Meet Cano and Scyko. These sprites were recolored by me, with pe2k.com's sprites used as bases. Arcanine's fur came from a Pikachu, while Alakazam's came from a Dewgong and a Shiny Rayquaza. Well that's all for now *goes to work on Chapter 2*.

Chapter END


Next Time: Shadows in the Dark...

Suddenly the light that came from the holes in the log was gone then back then gone, then back again. Cloud looked up in time to see wide cloaked figure walked over the hole. Cloud stood stiff as a board, and tears began to well up in his eyes. As he cried quietly to himself, one word escaped his lips… “Shadows…”

[Cano]

ZeroGKikaider
7th August 2005, 8:51 PM
this was very good...it would be greater if u added nudity and blood and gore just like ganes these days

p.s.also put in a "hot coffee" scene so it can get raded AO by hilary clinton

[Cano]
11th August 2005, 2:31 AM
Hahahaha, yeah ok ZGK, anyways I know posted my future game ideas on this (http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?p=1832457#post1832457) thread. Beware though, it's long, and I am only including this link so you all can learn more about the fic, because it's based on my ideas for a new game. Seeya, oh yeah, Ch.2 to be posted...when I finish XP
^^SCM^^

BrokenDreams
11th August 2005, 6:11 AM
when's the next chapter, that was awesome

[Cano]
11th August 2005, 6:26 AM
Well, it'll be around...umm maybe before or after Sunday, we're moving now and my parents are constantly nagging me :/ but now that I have two reviewers :D I'll work twice as hard whenever I can. You two are awesome!! And thanks a lot for reading :) I reeeeeeeeeeeally appreiciate it, I just love writing and I love everyone's reviews. It's sooooo great, the best ever, thanks :D *goes to continuing writing*
^^SCM^^

xXSaberXx
16th August 2005, 4:47 AM
WOOTTTT! I liked it! Espically Cano! xP

Anyways, teh awesome job there. Everything was very descriptive, and I enjoyed it a lot. Kudos to ya! And ignore the Hot Coffee guy, he's either on crack or just an annoying noob.

TOOTLES

Saber

[Cano]
16th August 2005, 5:33 AM
WOOTTTT! I liked it! Espically Cano! xP

Anyways, teh awesome job there. Everything was very descriptive, and I enjoyed it a lot. Kudos to ya! And ignore the Hot Coffee guy, he's either on crack or just an annoying noob.

TOOTLES

Saber
YAY! Another awesome reviewer, thank you soo much for reading :3 and I luffs (stole your word!!) Cano too. Him and Scyko (HAH!) are great, especially together, because they are total opposites! Cano is very responsive, spontaneous and very short tempered, while Scyko is slow (a slow Alakazam...wtf?!), calm, and always takes in everything before acting. In some ways, he may seem totally emotionless, while Cano appears to be overzealous, but they both care about Chase and Coud.


Anyways, teh awesome job there.
Really? Wow, thanks 8) this makes me feel great! This is why I love sharing my writing with people, because I love the responses I get, good and bad. Thanks a lot xXSaberXx, you're awesome, and Chapter 2 should be up soon. Keep an eye on my sig to know when it's complete.


And ignore the Hot Coffee guy, he's either on crack or just an annoying noob.
Yeah I didn't take his comment to heart all that much, only cause he's a good friend of mine since junior high. He was only kidding, he told me it was great...though you are right about the 'noob' part, and I can't argue with you there XD

Well, back to Shadows in the Dark...! Seeya soon ^_~
xXxSCMxXx

[Cano]
25th August 2005, 8:29 PM
[Rt-13+]
This chapter contains mild violence, and mention of blood.


Shadows in the Dark…

The forest was dark; the branches at the tops of the trees were cluttered and tangled, allowing little to no light to squeeze in. Here and there, little streams of light broke through the dense tree-tops and made their way to the moss covered ground, like spears piercing a mighty beast. Other than that however, was darkness; total darkness. Cloud had stopped in one of the spears of light, and began to rummage through his backpack. Beneath the Pokéballs, Potions, Antidotes, and Rice balls were clothes, and beneath that…was the bottom of the bag.

“Son of a…how could I have not packed a flashlight?” he cursed himself.

Great, he thought menacingly, without a flashlight, how am I supposed to get through this forest?

He sat himself down on a nearby boulder and surveyed his surroundings carefully. Not that much could be seen, but nonetheless, he stared, not to take in the environment, but to think of his next move. Because of this, he did not notice Cano and Scyko high in the trees, watching over him; his guardians.

Cloud sneezed, rubbed his nose and continued to think.

“OW!” he screamed in pain, rubbing the top of his head vigorously.

He immediately turned his gaze skyward looking for whatever had hit him. But there was nothing. Just the same view he had seen before; branches and leaves and darkness. He lowered his gaze and went back to his thoughts, no longer wondering what hit him.

Finally, after several long minutes of deep thought, he came up with a solution: go back home, and grab a flashlight…He really didn’t want to, because he was already deep in the forest, and turning back now would most definitely make him very, very late. But to continue blindly was a risk he was not willing to take.

Cloud rose to his feet and grabbed his backpack, but the second he lifted it up it slipped from his hand, landing on its side with a loud clonk. Curious, Cloud opened the side pocket. Inside was a relatively new, black and red flame embossed flashlight, thicker than a pencil, yet no longer than a needle. He smiled to himself as he noticed a little note located in the same pocket that the flashlight had been. It read:

Son,
It's funny how you packed essentials for your trip (Pokéballs, Potions and the like) but you forgot to pack a flashlight >_<. What were you thinking? It’s a good thing I checked your bag before you left; you'd be going nowhere fast without one. It’s a pretty small flashlight, but don’t underestimate it; the light from this particular flashlight shines brighter than any other! I came across this light back during my journey. I remember training with Cano, and literally stumbling into an underground cave. Cano was still a little Growlithe at the time, but was as he has always been; overprotective, always jumping the gun, even before the trigger was pulled. When I awoke, we were already deep in the cave. It was dark in that cave, darker than a Scyko’s eyes…anyway I’m rambling point is deep in that cave was this flashlight, and with it, Cano and I were able to leave the cave. I’ve had it ever since that day, and it’s never let me down. Now, I am giving it to you my son. Hope your journey is filled with fun times, good friends and new sights to be seen.
Chase

“…Alright! I’ve got a flashlight!” Cloud shouted upon finishing the note.

Then out of nowhere he struck a pose, holding the flashlight high in the air clasped in his right hand, with his left at his side, and his head looking up into the darkness, as if to show a giant his accomplishment. A look of confused embarrassment came across his face when he finished posing.

“W-where did that come from? Well I’ll never do that again,” he finished quickly lowering his right hand and looking from left to right, as if someone somewhere could have seen him.

“Let’s try this again,” he said to himself.

He grabbed his backpack once more, daring it to fall again then swung it over his back. Still clutching the flashlight in his right hand he turned it on, and was amazed at how bright it was; the light from this little gadget shone as if Cloud held a little Sun in his hand. Everything from directly in front of him, to at least 5 yards was brightly lit, and clearly visible.

“This…is amazing. So much power in such a little device! With this, I’ll make it in no time!”

He leapt from the moss covered boulder onto a fallen branch, grinding his way toward the next boulder, unaware that he was being watched, being followed by his guardians.

Earlier…

Cano was helpless, his every move controlled by Scyko and his Psychic attack. Cano had leapt from his hiding place after thinking something terrible was about to befall little Cloud. Turns out, he had just sneezed; too bad Cano had already reacted. It was his nature and he had meant well by it, but because of his actions he was now hanging directly over Cloud, thanks to Scyko. Scyko had quickly reacted which wasn’t normal for him, and caught Cano above Cloud’s head. As quickly as it had happened, one might have thought it had been previously orchestrated; however Scyko was used to Cano’s over-reacting personality, and was therefore ready for anything.

So there they were the three of them; one child and two full grown pokémon in the middle of a dark forest. To any passerby the scene would seem hilarious; there sat Cloud, deep in thought atop a moss covered boulder, with a full grown Arcanine floating mere inches above his head surrounded in a light blue aura similar to the one surrounding Scyko’s hand. Cano turned his head back toward Scyko, and curled his snout into toothy grin. A grin that sent a shiver down Scyko’s spine, making him lose his ‘grip’ for merely a second. In that second, Cano’s snout hit Cloud’s head. Scyko’s eyes widened, and he quickly regained his ‘grip’ on Cano. He lifted Cano quickly into the trees, making sure to hide himself and Cano from Cloud; he had merely wanted to watch over the young trainer till Barden Town, but Cano was making this continually difficult.

Cloud hadn’t noticed them, and went back to his thinking. Scyko sighed and turned to scold Cano, only to find Cano breathing very heavily inches from his face. A worried look appeared across Scyko’s face, and he began to sweat profusely. Cano’s eyes were gone, replaced by complete and utter blackness; it was reeeeeeally scary. Scyko may have known to except anything and everything from Cano, but at this point he was completely stumped as to what Cano’s next move would be; and was a thought scarier than Cano’s eyes at this moment. The seconds dragged on, and soon Scyko had summed up enough courage to at least try to calm Cano.

“A-al ala,” he said, his hands trembling in front of him.

His efforts appeared fruitless; Cano’s snout curled ever more viciously with every word, his muscles tightening, his claws digging ever deeper in the branch of the tree on which they stood.

He decided to add quickly, “ALAKA ALA AL! ALAKAZAM!”

Cano seemed to take these words in, ponder them. Scyko began to breathe, slow and shallow breaths, but breathing nonetheless. Cano’s eyes lightened, his snout uncurled, his muscles loosen, and his claws retract. Then he did something he had never done before; he licked Scyko. Scyko was scared out of his mind. This was something he had never in his memory, seen Cano do. He wondered for a moment if it was a taste test; as crazy as it sounds, he wouldn’t put it past Cano.

Cano flinched; or at least that’s what it looked like to Scyko. He failed to notice that Cloud was up and moving, seemingly ready to leave the area and continue to Barden. However, Cano saw and was ready to tail him. Scyko noticed this, and turned to the area in which Cloud was sitting…only to find that Cloud was no longer there! Scyko turned sharply, ready to have to rope Cano in, but saw that he was already following Cloud deeper into the forest. Once again, Scyko found himself lagging behind as he leapt from tree branch to tree branch.
________________

Cloud was gaining speed and came close to losing control. At the speed he was going, that wouldn’t be a good thing. So he tried to slow down progressively, to maintain control. He continued to leap from branch to branch to boulder. Ahead of him was a large clearing, devoid of the boulders and fallen branches he needed to continue. Since he had his special light, he was a great distance away. This gave him the time he needed to think up a solution to his problem.

He was closer now, and still had no idea how he was going to get across it. He was approaching fast; fifteen feet…twelve feet…nine feet…5 feet. Then an idea hit him as hard as that mysterious object did earlier. He switched from the branch he was on to one that curved upward because he would need as much a boost he could get. At the right moment, he leapt from the tip of the curved branch, and soared into the air. It was the most exhilarating, and positively frightening thing he had ever experienced. He couldn’t help but smile as he flew through the air. The branch he was aiming for was within his grasp. He reached up as far as his arms would allow, but grabbed nothing but air. And then a horrible realization came to him; he was dropping.

His arms flailed as he dropped like a rock to the forest floor. He couldn’t tell how far he was from the ground, but guessed that it wouldn’t take long for him to reach it. And he was right. Within seconds, his body collided with the ground as he landed on his side. The air was knocked out of him as if a Graveler had tackled him directly in the stomach. He rolled for a few feet, then caught a bump and sailed into the air for a few seconds, then came back down, rolled and flipped. He came to a sudden stopped when he hit the trunk of a tree. Cloud’s head was still spinning, but his body was too thrashed to move anymore.

Once his head stopped spinning, he felt the pain. It was unbearable! His whole body ached; he had never in his life felt pain even remotely close to this. And to top it off, he felt like he had to throw up. He leaned to his left, causing himself great pain in the process, and threw up. Afterward, he gathered all the strength left in his body, and pushed himself back against the tree. As he sat there, body throbbing, and vomit dribbling down his lip, he began to drift in and out of consciousness.

No, he thought, I can’t pass out…I’ll never make it if I do…I…gotta…stay aw…awa…awake…

And he was out like a light, slumped against the tree, battered and bruised. Meanwhile hundreds of yards away from Cloud were three people. Three dark people, faces concealed, and heavily cloaked walking slowly amongst the tall dark trees of the forest. They walked in silence, their cloaks swaying lightly with every step. Though their faces were concealed, it was easy to decipher their genders; two were female while one was male. This was clear by their physiques, though you had to look closely to see the differences between the three because the all were heavily layered by many cloaks.

One of the women was tall, about five foot five, and appeared to be slender, though this was hard to tell due to the numerous cloaks she wore; the second woman was shorter than the first, but a bit taller than Cloud, and was a little heavier than the first; finally the man was tallest of all standing at least several inches above the taller female. From the looks of his cloak, he was rather muscular. Each of them held a duffel bag strapped on each of their backs. These bags seemed to be full, but of what was a mystery; finally, the smallest woman spoke, her voice soft and smooth with a hint of danger hidden within.

“Myner, we have been walking for hours. Are we lost?”

She had addressed the taller woman, who seemed to be their leader.

The one called Myner responded harshly, “We are not lost. We’ve been walking for hours because this happens to be the largest forest in the region! What did you expect?”

“I would’ve expected that we, as Shadows, could find an easier and faster way through this annoyance. I’m tired of all these trees, this dirt, this…nature,” she spat with disgust, “Why didn’t we just mow this forest down! Or better yet, find another way?!”

This time the man spoke, his voice gruff and scratchy, yet calming; almost an exact opposite of the shorter female.

“Because as Shadows, we are to attract no attention what-so-ever so that we remain Shadows, understand? That is why we’re walking through the forest, rather than destroying it. Besides, the ‘firepower’ we brought with us wouldn’t be enough to destroy even a square foot of land.”

“Humph, I guess…whatever Syer, you’re always taking her side,” said the small woman.

“Stop whining Niyimee! Just shut up and keep walking! You’re wasting your energy if you do anything else,” Myner shouted.

If it was not clear before, it was now; Myner was their leader. Not only had she been walking in front of the other two, whatever she seemed to say last about a subject was what was accepted as the absolute end result. Neither Niyimee, nor Syer ever seemed to cross her. She didn’t look it, and there was no hint in her voice as there was in Niyimme’s, but she was not to be underestimated. Something about her could terrify even the most mentally and physically able. Emanating from her was raw power, and an unflinching determination to do whatever needed to clear anything and everything standing in her way. And no one was willing to stand in her way.

“We better pick up the pace,” Myner said suddenly, “It’s getting dark-“

“Oh, what a brilliant observation Myner, care to make another?” Niyimee mumbled sarcastically.

Myner stopped and whipped around to face Niyimee and pulled off her hood concealing her face; she had light blue-green hair, bright hazel eyes, and sharper canines than most people. Her eyes had a light glow surrounding them, and her teeth were clenched tightly together.

Through her clenched teeth, she growled, “What did you just say?”

Niyimee flinched slightly, but regained herself and answered loudly, “Nothing…nothing at all.”

Myner snorted, growled out something similar to ‘Good’, turned back around pulling up her hood, and continued to walk on. Niyimee glowered to herself and continued to follow Myner. They had a long way ahead of them.
______________

When he regained consciousness, it was darker than usual; the thin spears of light no longer pierced through the treetops. Cloud was still a little woozy, his muscles still sore, and the taste of vomit still fresh in his mouth. He tried to stand, but to no avail. He came crashing back down to the ground. Pain shot up his body and lasted for about ten seconds. Once the pain had subsided, he began he second attempt. He tripped, but caught himself, and was able to finally stand while leaning against the tree. He looked from left to right, to regain his bearings. Then it all came back to him in one quick jumbled scene; everything from the jump, to him losing consciousness. He chuckled to himself, but stopped quickly and began to hold his side, because it hurt to laugh.

The pain was excruciating and led him to wonder whether or not any of his bones had been broken. He had no way of knowing…at least not until he made it to Barden. No doubt however, that that little stunt of his cost him some time; so he wasn’t too keen on spending even more time in a hospital bed. If there aren’t any bones bursting through my flesh, he thought with a shutter, I good to go…as long as I don’t think up anymore brilliant ideas. He then prepared himself to continue his journey.

As he pushed himself away from the tree, he wavered a little and almost fell! He ended up leaning on the tree again to regain his balance. Alright, once more, he said to himself, and pushed off the tree once more. But he had pushed a little too hard that time, and couldn’t catch himself this time. He stumbled for a few seconds, and eventually stood up, amazed at this sudden save. But then the pain came back, and he forgot all about his miraculous save. So he mustered all his remaining strength and began the rest of his long walk to Barden, holding his arm as he walked.

Cloud may have been able to move, but that didn’t help him much; his movement was seriously hindered due to his bruised muscles. A Slowpoke could have made better time! But he continued on anyway, because he had made a promise to himself. So he trudged on, wincing at every step he took, whining at every tiny drop he came to. As careful as he was, he stumbled several times, and even fell to his knees. But he got back up every time; he was determined to make it to Barden.

He walked for what felt like hours, taking his time walking slowly, lest he fall again. After walking about thirty minutes, he began to hear things; voices and the sound of footsteps over the forest floor. He tried to ignore them; he even told himself that he was imagining them. But as the voices and footsteps got louder and closer, he could no longer try to delude himself. There were others in Verd Forest. Though he had no idea of their intentions, something inside him told him to avoid their attention. He couldn’t quite place it, but whenever he heard their voices, his insides twisted and an unknown fear swept over him.

Cloud began to panic and quickly looked from left to right, searching for a hiding place. With none in sight he was a sitting duck. But for what, he didn’t know…and that was what ultimately scared him the most. Realizing that he had no place to hide, he decided to head straight for them, whoever they were. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe the fear he felt was just his paranoia. Maybe they were actually nice people, people who could help him. After all, they seemed to be coming from Barden. So maybe they could tell him just how far he was from his destination.

Cloud soon regretted his decision. The closer he got to them, the more his insides twisted, and he became more and more afraid. Their voices were closer than ever now; they sounded like they were right in front of him. They would be upon him soon. There was no escape anymore. He would soon find out their intentions, and his fate. He took one last step…and fell into a pit. He was surprised he hadn’t noticed this gaping hole, though it was disguised very well, not only because of the darkness, but also because of the gigantic tree that stood over it.

Cloud hit the dirt floor and rolled. He rolled over soft dirt and jagged rocks. Rolling and rolling, he felt the skin on his arm tear, the stinging pain as dirt entered the cut, and the feel of a warm thick liquid, stream down his arm. Rolling and rolling, until finally coming to a stop directly underneath a log. He lay still for a while, practically in shock. But it was the stinging feeling in his arm that brought him back to reality. He sat up and looked at his arm; the clothing near his cut was covered in blood, but he couldn’t find the tear in his clothing. Apparently the rock tore his skin only. Thank God for small miracles huh?

When he finally looked around, Cloud noticed that this place was completely hollowed out; all of the dirt underneath the trees roots had been removed. He even had enough space to stand up straight as an arrow. Once on his feet he remembered that he had no energy left, along with great pains left over from his tremendous fall before. Realizing this he hunched over grabbing his side in pain.

Amazing what adrenaline can do to you, he chuckled to himself.

At that moment he left some dirt and debris fall on his head. He looked up and finally noticed the log he had rolled under.

It seemed it was placed there purposely; probably to hide the huge hole made by whichever species of pokémon dared to call this home. There were many holes in the log however, and it seemed that anyone or anything could look into these holes and see the pokémon’s home. Maybe that’s why it was empty now…

Suddenly the light that came from the holes in the log was gone then back then gone, then back again. Cloud looked up in time to see wide cloaked figure walked over the hole. Cloud stood stiff as a board, and tears began to well up in his eyes. As he cried quietly to himself, one word escaped his lips… “Shadows…”

************************************************** *************************
Well I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, took a while to write thanks to writer's block -_-; that damned feeling of no new thoughts coming into my brain...grrr...I rather enjoy the ending of this chapter more than the beginning. I included the little side thing with Cano and Scyko to delve deeper into their characters. They'll play big roles in the chapters to come. Well, I'll be waiting for any comments and critiques, if that's the right context to use the word in. Seeya soon ^.~!

Chapter END


Next Time: Confronting the Darkness
It then turned to the female Shadow, who was still hunched over the duffel bag, and ordered coolly, “Kick it again.”

She seemed to have no complaints this time, as she stood and violently kicked the bag once more. The mysterious pokémon yelped in pain when the foot made contact, and whimpered afterward. Cloud opened his eyes and mouth in shock. These people were truly heartless. She reared to kick the bag for a third time.

ZeroGKikaider
26th August 2005, 7:28 AM
chapter 2 was dope keep up the good writing u were always the educated one out of the fantastic 3 and i was always the bad***** with a heart of gold

[Cano]
26th August 2005, 7:46 AM
Yeah you were, and Dave was...what was Dave again? Oh yeah! The bodyguard of Dre and Em. Thank ZGK, knew I could count on you man. Come back for the other chapters, k?
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mayonayz
27th August 2005, 1:29 AM
Very very nice! I like the story a lot so far. I like how you put a little bio of Cloud at the beginning with the info needed to make a clear mental image of the main character, and the events that will soon surround him. The only thing is,

Thank god for small miracles huh?
I would capitalize God. I'm looking forward to the next chapter!

Bashaamo
27th August 2005, 1:37 AM
I would too...
*On Topic* I like it. That chapter was so long though. *gets dizzy* Can someone tell me who Cano is? I think it's a Pokémon, sorry if it isn't... >_> But I probably skipped part of where you tell us what Cano is... >_> Oh, wait- he's an Alakazam, right? :D
-;257;

[Cano]
27th August 2005, 1:59 AM
Close blaze, but no cigar for you! Seriously, I wouldn't want to kill one of my reviewers xD anyways Cano is an Arcanine! xP here's what he looks like:
Cano and Scyko (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/chasespokes2.png)
The left is Cano, the right is Scyko. I own both of them xD and just so everyone knows, Cano isn't a shiny Arcanine, he color is entirely different...it more of a Pikachu color really.

And thank you soo much blaze for reading, and you too mayonayz you guys rock and thanks for the great comments. Also, I'll change god to God xD sorry about that, I never know when to capitalize it and when not to xP akk, you guys discovered my weakness!! Don't tell anyone :p k? Hope you both come back for the 3rd Chappie. And I'll try not to make it too long, ok blaze xD I know how you feel. You guys rock, not because you gave me positive comments and priase, but because you even bothered to actually read and comment. Thanks...I apprieciate it a lot :)
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Bashaamo
27th August 2005, 2:27 AM
Close blaze, but no cigar for you! Seriously, I wouldn't want to kill one of my reviewers xD anyways Cano is an Arcanine! xP here's what he looks like:
Cano and Scyko (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/chasespokes2.png)
The left is Cano, the right is Scyko. I own both of them xD and just so everyone knows, Cano isn't a shiny Arcanine, he color is entirely different...it more of a Pikachu color really.

And thank you soo much blaze for reading, and you too mayonayz you guys rock and thanks for the great comments. Also, I'll change god to God xD sorry about that, I never know when to capitalize it and when not to xP akk, you guys discovered my weakness!! Don't tell anyone :p k? Hope you both come back for the 3rd Chappie. And I'll try not to make it too long, ok blaze xD I know how you feel. You guys rock, not because you gave me positive comments and priase, but because you even bothered to actually read and comment. Thanks...I apprieciate it a lot :)
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Darn it. -_- I never even guessed Sycko was like 'Psycho' which is spelt similar to 'Psychic'. I think late these times.... *sigh*
-;257;

[Cano]
27th August 2005, 2:35 AM
Hee, thanks ok blaze, it happens to...to..oh crap, brain fart x( nevermind what I was going to say, point is, it's ok. I find it a little funny however :D...sry if that makes me a bad person :(
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xXSaberXx
27th August 2005, 8:31 PM
LALA WTF SHADOWS!

o_O And Mynar=Vampire in my opnion. XPPPPPPPPP Course, that could be just me. *whistles*

Anyhoo, teh excellent. However, I suggest Cloud meet up with another person (Maybe a girl on the run from Shadow when she actually IS one lol) that would be a good plot twist. All in all, it's good. Cloud....neh. He needs more thoughts to himself, more charie building stuff. Cano and Sycko rock though. ^_^ *holds up flag* GO TEAM GO!!

Anyhoo, teh awesome.

Toodles!

(And I don't mind if you take mah word. xP Its just a word.)

Nylf
27th August 2005, 10:03 PM
;330; Hmm.. can't say it's original, but it is very, very good. It's not original, but it's differant.

;359; I'd go with Saber's idea. And make it so the two find a way to cure those who have become shadows.(it's like a curse isn't it?)

;373; Good length, description, humour and characters. The only improvement I can think of is give translations for Cano and Scyko.

;307;ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......

;249-d; This is really, really (gagged)

;330; I gagged Jack before he could say 'crap'. Anyway, don't listen to Jack. He makes the hot coffee guy look like Serebii.

Valkyrie X
27th August 2005, 11:49 PM
'Kay...I'm here on request. Where to start, where to start...

Originality...Meh. It's a trainer fic, and there are tons of those out there. Trainer fics are, as many of us know, the most common types of Pokémon fanfiction, and they're getting very repetitive. It's the same old story: A kid wakes up on his/her birthday and goes to Professor [insert tree here]'s lab to pick up their first Pokémon and start their own journey, planning to become a Pokémon master. Most trainer fics never get finished anyway...But on the other hand, there does seem to be some sort of interesting twist with Team Silhouette and the Shadows, and plus, this is taking place in a new region. So, that helps to fix the unoriginal trainer fic plot...

Your grammar and spelling were awesome...However, you do have quite a few small typos that should be edited. It's a common problem; it happens to everyone, so don't worry too much about it. The solution is to proofread very carefully before you post your chapters. Also, the word "Pokémon" is capitalized. But other than this, your grammar was great.

Your description was excellently done. You elaborated very well on Cloud and his thoughts, the Pokémon, the settings, the mood, everything...Description is vital in fanfiction, and you have mastered the concept of it. Wonderful job on this part.

The lengths of the chapters were perfect; not too short, not too long...Just right. You don't have any problems with your chapter lengths, so well done here...

Overall, I'm rating your fic a five, even if this is a trainer fic; it's definitely one of the better ones I've read. You really are a talented writer. Just proofread before you post, keep your chapters good and long, don't lose that gift you've got for describing, and try not to let writer's block slow you down. Keep it up; I hope your fic will become as famous as epics such as The Legendarian Chronicles and The Quest for the Legends.

;381;ZR;380;

lone_wolf816
28th August 2005, 12:05 AM
This is a very interesting story and i like how you use a dark story! It seems like Cloud is... not very good at walking^_^But what really made me read thhis was your advertising! It was excellent(to bad i dont have one*sighs*) Anyway keep it up!

;197;

Insincerus
28th August 2005, 1:49 AM
Hiya ^_~ Did a pretty good analysis of your fic. There were several things mentioned in the beginning of the Trainer Background Story review that also refers to the same things in the other chapters of your story. My first suggestion is that you always type your fic onto Microsoft Word or any other writing program that has a Spelling/Grammar check, that way you won't make the mistakes before posting. Then, just copy and paste the story from Microsoft Word (or other) into your post, and vwah-lah...clean-ish story:

Trainer Background Story Review
Very good, very good...this was exactly what I did in my first fic, and gives the reader a better understanding of the new world you are speaking of in your story. Here are some of the corrections I found:


As a result, he grew up with no knowledge of Kanto, its people or its pokémon.
Usually, in most fics, Pokémon is always capitalized. It's not necessarily required, but many find it appealing to the eye.


He knows only the stories he was told while listening to the Hoothoots sing their nocturnal lullaby.
lol, I feel so horrible XD This is not a very large mistake, but the correct spelling is "Hoot-hoot." Also, when referring to the plural form of any Pokémon's name, the singular form is also the same as the plural, so you can simply leave it "Hoot-hoot."

Woo...you survived that pretty well XD

Chapter 1 Review
I found some grammatical errors. Other than that, I love the plot...it is going along like a Trainer fic, but with a new twist and an evil team bent on causing mayhem and evil. Shweet ;) Good character development, I might add:


He gazed aimlessly wondering, What am I supposed to see?
A small mistake...I believe you were trying to show the reader a character's thoughts. In this case, put their thought into italics so it will look more clean and does not get confused with the author's text.


Hold on there son.
God, I feel terrible for correcting you ;-; When a person is speaking to another person, and says something to them before catching their attention with their name or title, always put a comma between the phrase and the name/title, like so:

Hold on there, son.
Happy birthday, you strange person.
Why are you staring at me like that, Munchface?
See? lol...


He is known to many as “The Next Gen”, which meant "next generation", and "next genius".
Always put the punctuation within the quotes, and never put punctuation after the quotes. E.g. I went to the store and bought two "dinglebergs." instead of: I went to the store and bought two "dinglebergs". Whether it be periods, commas, semicolons, or colons, always put them into the quotes if it should follow one.

Chapter 2 Review
I've already noted all of the grammatical errors in your story, so I'll just go straight with your overall review:

The plot is thick, and I just love reading the conversations between the characters. The fact that the Team Silhouette shadows change can confuse me at times (a good thing), and the Pokémon have as good personalities as the actual characters, which is rare in a new fic. I believe you're doing a slendid job, but to avoid all the chaos I stated above, always type your chapters into Microsoft Word first, correct it with the Spelling/Grammar check, and then you'll be set. A good story always needs to be clean-cut and correct, so it will look appealing to those who read it.

Keep up the good work ;)
~Chesh

[Cano]
28th August 2005, 5:05 AM
WHOA!! Where to start...from the beginning I think xP

xXSaberXx: GAHHH!! I have...no idea ;>>...what <<; you're talking about. You revealed meh plot twist!! xP though I guess it was kinda obvious huh? Meh...maybe I'll change it...or not I dunno. And Myner's teeth aren't THAT long xDDDDDD just longer than normal. And Cloud is a lone person...he keeps to himself (even in a 3rd person perspective xD ) but maybe he'll open up a little more...who knows? Oh wait, I KNOWS ;P hehehe ;D Thanks again for reading, I apprieciate it.

Shiny Flygon: Originality = not meh huh? Well can't say I like hearing it, but I suppose it's true huh? Ah wellz it's ok. And I was thinking whether or not to translate for Cano and Scyko...I'm not to sure, (Cano looks up. Oh I want to hear this.) because I think that leaving them un-translated (for lack of a better word...seriously xP ) gives the reader more control over the story, by filling in the blanks with their own dialogue (Oh come ON!! That's BS and you know it!! "Shush Cano!"). But I'm still considering it. Thanks I apprieciate it! :D

Alto Mare Warrioress: Me grammar wear awezum?!?! Haha, sorry, I know corny, but I am a corny person. Anyways, I'm very happy you think that. I've kinda always had a nack for reading and writing and spelling, though I no where near being 'awesome.' (<--Chessy -_~) Also, I purposely didn't capitalize Pokemon...I don't know why exactly, so I'll fix it xD and wow! An honest good review! W00T!!! :DDDDD Thanks a lot, I really apprieciate it. And it's actually just Silhouette...no Team, it makes it sound like they're just messing with ya...and they're not -_-;;

Lone Wolf816: WOW!! A reviewer I didn't have to bribe!! :DDDDDDDDDD *slips you that 20 I promised xP* Well I'm glad the ad does its job...I think I'll keep it then. And thanks for reading :D And hey, he fell...and it hurts *grabs his side* to walk ^-^

The Cheshire Cat: Thank you. You found the mistakes I let slip (not let as in on purpose, but...nvm you know). I actually do type it out in MS Word first. But for some reason, when I Copy and Paste, the things in Bold, Italics, and Underline don't stay that way. And thanks for clearing those two things up for me; the adressing issue, and the quotations issue. Oh and Hoot-Hoot (I'm so ashamed xD *hides in stupidity*). I'll make sure to fix that, thanks. I really apprieciate you review.

Everyone, thanks soooo much. I apprieciate every single last review :D You guys are great! :DDD Seeya soon with the next chapter!
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Insincerus
29th August 2005, 8:12 PM
lmao, Sig

If you want to make things Italic, Bold, or Underlined, use these tags before and after typing the text you want Italicized/Bold/Underlined (note: take out the asterisk "*" for the real code):

Italics:

I wonder what's in that pile of dung?[/I*]

Without the *:

[I]I wonder what's in that pile of dung?

Bold:

This is very important.[/B*]

Without the *:

[B]This is very important.

Same thing goes for the Underlines; just use the letter "U" in place of "I" or "B." Understand? kewl

Good luck with the fic ;)

~Chesh

[Cano]
29th August 2005, 9:12 PM
You mean like this? OMG, I would have never guessed. :p only kidding Cheshy (may I call you that?) and on a different note, I would like to name a few Fakemon that will appear as some 4th generation submissions:
Tundras and its pre-evos by SuicuneZ
Reynile by Chibi Pika http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/Reynile.gif
Glacien and it's evo by kalken http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/glacennevo.png
Anhel and its evos by me :D http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/anhel.png
Spectren by me :D (again) http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/spectren-redone2.png
and this little guy by me as well :D (no name as of yet) http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/cubonepre-evo.png
and some that escape me at this particular moment xP (turns out, there weren't anymore xD I'm such a ditz)

If you have any Fakemon, please PM them to me, I definitely need them!! I'm hoping to fill at least 40 more slots out of the 100 new ones that would be in the 4th gen (my guess, not an assumption). The reason I'm using around 50 of them instead of all, is because that's a lot to include, and our hero won't have anywhere near all of the new gen Pokes, let alone see all of them. Though I will accept at least 100 entries for mentions and such, but not full in depth descriptions of all of them so the first 50 will be the lucky ones I guess. So, start submitting and I'll seeya soon, as always.
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PS: I will try to obtain sprites of these great Fakes.

Psychic
30th August 2005, 5:21 PM
Wow. Very awesome fic ya got there. Jah. Took a trainer fic and twisted it, adding in some originality.

Description was great, and there was just the right amount. Sometimes your descriptions of Pokémon were a bit weird and you could have found better words to use (such as tuffs or plates) to describe


Characters were great and pretty nicely developed, but I found it weird that Cano and Scyko were colored oddly. I liked how they had totally different personalities, making them an interesting pair. Interesting how Cloud only kept them, huh?
Humans were also very good, nice job portraying those Shadows. Cloud seemed very mature for 9, though.



Just a few mistakes I found-


Today was the day his 9th birthday.
It should either be ‘Today was the day of his 9th birthday.’ Or ‘Today was his 9th birthday.’ But I’d stick with the first, because the second one sounds less sophistamacated (otherwise known as sophisticated).



“Dad, I told you, I’m getting my first pokémon today, remember?” Cloud complained.
I think instead of ‘complained’ it should be ‘whined’ or ‘moaned’. He didn’t make a complaint, he stated a fact.



He also wore black shorts that stopped above his knees, and wooden sandals that looked more appropriate on a samurai than him; and Cloud looked very little like his father.
There should not be a semi-colon. You’re talking about Chase and suddenly you’re saying Cloud didn’t look much like his father. Two subjects, should not be in the same sentence. I’d suggest something like ‘…samurai than him. Cloud on the other hand, looked nothing like his father.’ Or something along those lines.



If there aren’t any bones bursting through my flesh, he thought with a shutter, I good to go…as long as I don’t think up anymore brilliant ideas. He then prepared himself to continue his journey.
A few things here. First, as already pointed out, thoughts should be either in Italics (Chesh showed you how to do that) or with quotation marks. If you do it with quotations, only use one instead of two, so we know it’s a though, not spoken.
Second, a ‘shutter’ is something you have on a window. The word you’re thinking of is ‘shudder’.
Then Cloud though ‘I good to go’ when it should have been ‘I’m good to go’.
Also, I believe ‘anymore’ should be two words: ‘any more’.
Lastly, ‘He then prepared himself’ should probably be ‘He then readied himself’.



At that moment he left some dirt and debris fall on his head.
I’m not sure what you meant here, but I’m sure you didn’t mean for the word ‘let’ to be spelled ‘left’. Unless you meant that ‘The moment he left, some dirt and debris fell on his head.’ Yea, I’ll go with the second one. So just take out ‘At that’ and replace it with ‘The’. Yea.



That’s everything I could find. You sometimes forgot to capitalize ‘Silhouette’ and ‘Shadow’ (or just Silhouette…meh). Yea, it should be spelled ‘Pokémon’. I saw another mistake near the end of the third chapter (I think), but when I tried to Copy it, the computer refused to continue working unless I closed that window, so I lost it. >.<



Hmm, what else to say? The fic has enough realism, but how come they lowered the age to become a trainer? Cloud just turned 9, correct? I’d expect that with an evil organization kidnapping children, the government would make the legal training age higher. o.o



Well, that’s the end of my review. Very nice fic you got there, thank you for recommending it to me. And mayo, Chessy, funny meeting you two here! Mayo, you never read random fics, only the ones that some people ask you to read! This must be like a whole new you! *claps on back*

So yea SCM, keep up the great work, and…see you around!
*teleports away*
~Psychic

[Cano]
30th August 2005, 6:58 PM
Wow. Very awesome fic ya got there. Jah. Took a trainer fic and twisted it, adding in some originality.

Gracias!


Description was great, and there was just the right amount. Sometimes your descriptions of Pokémon were a bit weird and you could have found better words to use (such as tuffs or plates) to describe
Der, how could I forget such words? Meh, maybe I'll change it for future readers *cricket, cricket* ^-^;;;



Characters were great and pretty nicely developed, but I found it weird that Cano and Scyko were colored oddly. I wanted to be different. ^-^
I liked how they had totally different personalities, making them an interesting pair. Interesting how Cloud only kept them, huh? They're his dad's actually, and Chase kept em, because they refused to leave him. Aww, dey wuv him ^-~

Humans were also very good, nice job portraying those Shadows. Cloud seemed very mature for 9, though.
Someone once said this here on SPPf,
We as authors sometimes tend to make the main character more like ourselves in personality and description, rather than creating a totally new individual. Whether this is done on purpose or as an unseen habit, one thing is for sure; you can tell a lot about the author from the main character.so basically Cloud is me...a child forced to grow up before he was ready...you also have to take into account how he feels about his mother. The whole 'I feel responsible, because I couldn't save her' attitude. So therefore, he is purposely trying to appear more mature, thereby appearing stronger than he is, both mentally and physically. But don't worry, his act will falter every now and then...after all, he's still just a child ^-^



Just a few mistakes I found-


It should either be ‘Today was the day of his 9th birthday.’ Or ‘Today was his 9th birthday.’ But I’d stick with the first, because the second one sounds less sophistamacated (otherwise known as sophisticated).

Hmm, yes yes I see I see *jots down mistakes to be corrected*



I think instead of ‘complained’ it should be ‘whined’ or ‘moaned’. He didn’t make a complaint, he stated a fact.
Uh-huh, uh-huh



There should not be a semi-colon. You’re talking about Chase and suddenly you’re saying Cloud didn’t look much like his father. Two subjects, should not be in the same sentence. I’d suggest something like ‘…samurai than him. Cloud on the other hand, looked nothing like his father.’ Or something along those lines.
I've only recently discovered the semi-colon, and what its used for, so I've been experimenting here and there with it. If I were to show you my other fics from before I 'matured' (and before I had a computer xD) then you'd see I use semi-colons at least 200% more than I did then. xD



A few things here. First, as already pointed out, thoughts should be either in Italics (Chesh showed you how to do that) or with quotation marks. If you do it with quotations, only use one instead of two, so we know it’s a though, not spoken.
I know how to express thoughts; there are several examples of my using the Italics tags perfectly to express a thought being thunk...dededed (SHHHH!! xP) it's just that it's hard to see everywhere that a thought exists when I paste the finished chapter from MS Word here. But spank you for pointing out another mistake para moi!


Second, a ‘shutter’ is something you have on a window. The word you’re thinking of is ‘shudder’.
I see...tell me more...


Then Cloud thought ‘I good to go’ when it should have been ‘I’m good to go’.
Also, I believe ‘anymore’ should be two words: ‘any more’.
Lastly, ‘He then prepared himself’ should probably be ‘He then readied himself’.
Well if it isn't the pot callin teh kettle ^-~ and anymore is two words? Interesting. Readied, gotcha!




I’m not sure what you meant here, but I’m sure you didn’t mean for the word ‘let’ to be spelled ‘left’. Unless you meant that ‘The moment he left, some dirt and debris fell on his head.’ Yea, I’ll go with the second one. So just take out ‘At that’ and replace it with ‘The’. Yea.
Was supposed to be 'felt'...>.< + xD



That’s everything I could find. You sometimes forgot to capitalize ‘Silhouette’ and ‘Shadow’ (or just Silhouette…meh). I did?? I'd thought I'd never do that, seeing as every time I mention Silhouette or their Shadows I always italicize em...meh, mistakes happen, and I could be mistaken about that.
Yea, it should be spelled ‘Pokémon’.Someone here on SPPf said,
Yeah how can people tell you
OMGZ, Pikachu's supposed to lay EGGS not give BIRTH!?!? when you're the author! Everyone has their own ideas about the Pokemon universe and how certain things happen. Who's to say that they don't really give birth? It's my story and my idea, so I can tell whichever side I want. so would this not apply to the way I spell 'Pokemon' or am I just crazy?
I saw another mistake near the end of the second (There are two chapters, and one prologue) chapter (I think), but when I tried to Copy it, the computer refused to continue working unless I closed that window, so I lost it. >.<
Aww!! I missed out on the rest of mah review *pouts* thanks a lot stupid computer. -_-;;;



Hmm, what else to say? The fic has enough realism, but how come they lowered the age to become a trainer? Cloud just turned 9, correct? I’d expect that with an evil organization kidnapping children, the government would make the legal training age higher. o.o
It's a dog eat dog world. And they're not kidnapping children, they're kidnapping potential Shadows which explains why they were after Cloud and not Chase (his father). They also take Pokemon as well, but the purpose is unknown even by me at the moment xD. Besides, these children have their Pokemon to protect them, and therefore aren't normal 9 year olds...Cloud wasn't normal to begin with (see above). Plus those are the rules of this new region. The trainers of Fuego are stronger than Kanto trainers because they start before Kanto trainers, and a year can make a huge difference sometimes.



Well, that’s the end of my review. Very nice fic you got there, thank you for recommending it to me. And mayo, Chessy, funny meeting you two here! Mayo, you never read random fics, only the ones that some people ask you to read! This must be like a whole new you! *claps on back*

So yea SCM, keep up the great work, and…see you around!
*teleports away*
~Psychic
Heh, no problem! I'm glad you liked it. And you weren't kidding about you reviews either <o.o>;;; but that was a good thing :D thanks for the honest review. Seeya soon, and hopefully with Chapter 3 in hand...computer...thing..ie...:$
<SCM>

PS: Sorry if at certain points I sound aggitated or anything, I totally didn't mean anything by it at all. I was just joking around and offering a healthy argument at points. But please forgive me if I sound rude ^-^;;; not my intention in the least.

Psychic
30th August 2005, 7:20 PM
Pfft, the day someoe thinks that sounds rude is the day I make friends with a n00b.

Shoot, I thought I wrote Chase that time! Stupid C playing tricks on my poor, unsuspecting brain...

And I totally understand about a bit of you being in your character. Somehow, each character portrays a specific trait of mine, and sometimes shows a side of me that I've never known. Heekali, for instance, is me with my paranoia. My constant fears of my surroundings-is this ferris wheel going to brake? Does he mean me bodily harm? Are aliens going to kidnap me and perform freaky experiments on me?
...you didn't hear squat about aliens....

I only just started using the semi-colon; (<--OMG, LOOK!) purple_drake introduced us when she was correcting my fic.

And I know; not everyone spells it like that. In p_d's fic, she thinks that Pokémon are like animals, so why should the names of species be capitalised? Meh, I'm just old-fashioned. Except that I don't women belong in the kitchen! EQUAL RIGHTS, DAMMIT!


Hmm, nothing much else to say...oh yea-what's your e-mail? With Serebii's method, I can't attach files, so I'll have to send it teh normal way. :P Sowee.

~Psychic

[Cano]
1st September 2005, 6:53 AM
[Rt-17+]
This chapter contains words strong language, pokemon cruelty, death, and violence.



Confronting the Darkness

“Come out come out, wherever you are. Little boy, don’t try to delude yourself. We will find you. The longer you avoid us, the worse your punishment will be.”

Her voice was way past deranged; this bit** was just plain nuts. But she was right. He couldn’t run forever. They would catch him…and possibly kill him…But either way they’d have to catch him first. He wasn’t just gonna give up. He hadn’t that convenience anymore, because if he gave up, his life wouldn’t be the only one in danger. He looked down at the tiny creature in his arms. It was unconscious, the poor thing. He didn’t know what pokémon this was, but right now, that wasn’t important.

“Little boy, show yourself and I promise not to hurt you. Ha-ha-ha, oh no I won’t hurt you…just kill you!”

Her voice was far, and that comforted Cloud some; her voice was taunting and tormenting. She was enjoying herself but more than anything, she was mad. Cloud smirked ever so slightly, happy to cause so much trouble. He still couldn’t believe what he had done…but when he realized what they were carrying, how could he not react?

She spoke again, this time closer than before, and Cloud decided to move to another hiding place. As he limped to a nearby bush, he wondered how far off his path he had gone to avoid her. This was one long detour he was taking, and he couldn’t help but feel lost. He wished desperately to be back in the little pokémon dirt house, but shook his head violently. He had to concentrate on the here and now, not the past. He had to survive, to make it to Barden. Once there he’d feel safe. Only the truth was, he wasn’t safe anywhere. Shadows weren’t your average “Grunts”. They were cunning, ruthless, and deadly, devoid of all emotions. They were killers, plain and simple. And Cloud was scared.

He made it to the bush, and noticed a tree similar to the one that guarded the dirt home he fell in earlier. He had to make it to that tree. If he could, he knew he would survive. He just knew it.


15 minutes ago

“Shadows…” Cloud had said, tears streaming from his eyes. He knew he’d encounter them someday, and thought he’d have the courage to confront them whenever and wherever. He thought he was prepared, that he could handle himself and take down any Shadow he came across. But he had forgotten the feeling. He forgot the feeling you get when you’re around one. That feeling of absolute dread, the kind that freeze you were you stand, the kind that makes tears fall without being sad, the kind that sends shivers up the shivers and goose bumps along your spine. He forgot how they took his mother away from him. And in that instant it all came back to him, every last detail right down to the number of rocks on the cliff side. He remembered and realized he could never obtain the courage he wanted to fight them…at least not by standing around scared shitless.

They had passed the log by now, and where well past the tree when he decided to follow them. He made his way up the ramp like entrance to, what he had dubbed, the “Pokémon Dirt House”. It was hard for him, due to the immense pain, but he made it; he did not falter. When he emerged from the base of the tree, he ended up staring down the business end of a bone, held by a lizard-like pokémon with a head that looked similar to skull rather than a head. It had brown scales, and two gray claws for toes. Its tail was curled behind its body swishing from side to side, a spike close to the end of it, covered totally in brown scales. Its belly was peach in color, and reminded him of a dinosaur more than of a lizard. It seemed to tower over him as Cloud kneeled on the floor in front of it.

He felt angry and stupid, for thinking that they had not noticed him. Those holes were big enough to see through them, without even looking directly toward it. But as he stared up at the three of them, all other feelings were wiped clean, replaced by the well known terror that surrounded them. Frozen in fear, Cloud was at their mercy. Haunting memories came violently back to him. He had been in this situation before, but this time there was no one to save him.

Suddenly, one of the Shadows spoke; its voice was feminine. Her voice was calming, exactly the opposite of what one would think a Shadow would sound, and her words sailed smoothly over the gentle breeze, bobbing up and down as the currents shifted. She spoke, “Who are you, young child?”

Though her voice was placid and soothing, Cloud was reluctant to answer her. She was after all still a Shadow. So in reply he merely stared vacantly at her.

She spoke again, “I say little one, if you’re not comfortable in confiding with me your identity, why not as least enlighten me with the knowledge of your presence in this dark and foreboding place?”

…with the knowledge of my presence in this dark, he repeated in his head. He re-played and re-played her words in his head, but still came up with the same response.

So he stared again in the direction of the beautiful voice and replied, “Huh?”

“What are you doing here, child?” she spat irritably; she was slowly losing her patience. Her voice and her posture portrayed this, as she shifted her weight to her left foot, beginning to slowly tap with her right.

Her voice seemed to carry the slightest hint of annoyance. At this Cloud seemed to snap back to reality, realizing as if for the first time, that they were Shadows. He suddenly found his courage and spoke defiantly, “That is none of your concern Shadow.”

He spat the word out in disgust while raising quickly to his feet, despite the pain it caused him. Surprised, the Marowak jumped back, an appalled look stretched across it pearly white face. The Shadows seemed taken aback as well, but barely showed it as they stood in silence, their gazes seemingly fixed upon the young boy. The female laughed heartily, as if Cloud had told a hilarious joke, but she was soon silenced by the wave of her companions’ hand. The quickness of the action and reaction led Cloud to believe that this cloaked figure was their leader. The leader stepped forward, its cloak waving slowly in sync with its steps.

It approached the Marowak and stopped next to it, rummaging underneath its robes. Finally, revealing a black Pokéball it recalled the Marowak in an aura of black fog into its owner’s Pokéball, which the leader promptly threw to one of its underlings, apparently the real owner of the pokémon. The leader then spoke to Cloud; its voice was loud and seemed to echo without the need for trees and plants to bounce off of, making it seem as if two people were speaking in a closely synchronized fashion. Both voices were genderless; the first seemed to be loud yet light on the ears, while the second was deep and booming and seemed to shake the very trees and ground upon which they all stood. It said, “Child, you do not know of that which you speak. So I’d advise that you mind what you say, lest you utter something that could harm you or even kill you.”

Cloud’s courage suddenly left him just as quickly as a Pidgeot swoops in on its prey. He must have been crazy to assume that he, a mere boy, could stand on his own two feet when pitted against Shadows. Sweat began to fall from his face landing in his eyes, causing him to blink in pain. The dark figure chuckled; it had noticed Cloud’s fear.

“Scared are you? Good, just as you should be. I’m afraid we cannot overlook this little… ‘Chat,’ so you will be coming with us. I’m sure our Master can find some use for you… and if not, Niyimee can have some fun with you.”

Cloud had particularly enjoyed the way it mentioned the last bit of information. It seemed to enjoy the thought of his inevitable torture, relish in his future screams of agony. He had to run. It was either that, or be taken to the leader of Silhouette…something he did not plan on doing. He only needed the appropriate opportunity, a time at which his escape would most likely succeed. So he watched and waited, his eyes calculating every move they made, following and deciphering their patterns.

The leader turned its back on Cloud, so it was now or never. But before he could make a step toward his retreat, it said, “Niyimee, take the ‘garbage’ from Syer so that he may have free hands with which to ‘deal’ with this nuisance,” the leader barked coolly. The woman didn’t reply in a coherent manner, though it sounded similar to “Kiss my a**,” but she followed orders anyway. She turned toward the shadowy figure referred to as ‘Syer’ by the leader, and grabbed the ‘garbage’ that he was holding. She dropped it however, and when it hid the ground, cries of pain could be heard from inside the bag.

What the hell is in there?! Since when does garbage cry? Cloud wondered, fearing what the answer may have been.

The woman kicked the bag, and a loud yelp emanated from within it. This confirmed Cloud’s fears…a pokémon was inside that bag. He could only assume that the other two held bags with pokémon in them as well. That was the last straw for Cloud. His fists clenched, he gritted his teeth and his breathing became rapid with anger.

How could they…how? Those are pokémon in those bags…and she kicked one of them…she…kicked it… he told himself angrily. They could do whatever they pleased with him. But harming a pokémon was something he wasn't going to take sitting down.

“SHE KICKED IT!” he shouted at the top of his lungs, eyes shut tightly, his emotions and mind blurred by fury and rage.

This seemed to shock everyone; ‘Syer’ halted where he stood, the woman froze above the bag; she was inches from the handle. The leader even turned back to see what was the cause in the sudden halt of its men. Cloud’s breathing slowed, but he fists were still clenched as were his teeth. So much so that his fingernails began to dig into his palms, blood slowly seeping down his fingers.

He tried to calm himself and say something more, but that didn’t work; he ended up biting his lower lip causing more blood loss, which he quickly released from his Arcanine-like lock. He was shaking violently, which scared the one called Syer as he took one step back. He was about to take another when his leader waved another hand to signal his cease in movement. The cloaked figure then took a step forward, showing no fear.

“So she did. Does that bother you, little one?”

Cloud stood silent, shaking and bleeding, unable to change his thoughts into words. The phrase, “Delcatty got your tongue” comes to mind.

“I see,” it said with a laugh.

It then turned to the female Shadow, who was still hunched over the duffel bag, and ordered coolly, “Kick it again.”

She seemed to have no complaints this time, as she stood and violently kicked the bag once more. The mysterious pokémon yelped in pain when the foot made contact, and whimpered afterward. Cloud opened his eyes and mouth in shock. These people were truly heartless. She reared to kick the bag for a third time.

“…don’t you dare…”

“What was that? I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear that last comment,” the leader sneered back at Cloud.

“…stop…stop it…STOP IT!”

Before he could rationalize he was running full speed at the Shadow leader. He tackled it, elbow first, directly in its stomach. It was caught off guard and fell to the floor. Blinded by his rage, he turned toward the women, the Shadow who awoke this demon deep within Cloud, and charged. He had no intention of hitting her, so when she side stepped to avoid him, he did not trip. He merely chuckled as he grabbed the bag, and began his mad dash for freedom.

As he ran of into the distance, the remaining Shadows stood confused. Their leader stood, almost as if it had merely tripped. It brushed the dirt off its garments and stood in silence for a moment. It then barked at the other two, “WHAT ARE YOU FOOLS WAITING FOR?! Niyimee, after him! Syer, grab the remaining bag and let’s take our leave!”

Blindly following their orders, the woman (who we now know is Niyimee) ran off in the direction in which Cloud had made his escape, while the remaining Shadow, Syer went to retrieve the other duffel from the forest floor. As he did so, he noticed that his leader was clutching its side; it was wounded.

“Myner, you’re hurt. Maybe I should carry-” he began

“SILENCE! I am fine! That little sh** merely caught me off guard,” she managed to say through grit teeth.

That boy…how dare he stand up to us! We are Shadows! We are elite! Humph, no matter. Niyimee will take care of him soon enough, she though maliciously.

She then retrieved her duffel bag, and continued where they had left off.

Cloud was slowing down now. His adrenaline was leaving him. He was now running on pure hatred and rage. Too bad that didn’t stop the pain from his sore and bruised body. He continued to run however, determined to survive. If his hatred ever left him, he could always use the woman’s shouts as a motivational tool to help him move on. Because if there was one thing he knew for sure it was this; he did not want her to catch him. So he ran as if the hellhounds of Hades were at his very heels, which by the way that woman was foaming at the mouth didn’t seem as farfetched as he thought.


Now…

“Spoiled prat! Didn’t your mother ever teach you any manners?! It’s impolite to steal from others.”

Cloud fought hard to control his emotions. He had to remain focused if he wished to live to see tomorrow. He was only several yards away from the tree…and judging by the sound of her voice, the Shadow was quite far away. However, after their first encounter Cloud wasn’t gonna take any chances. He quietly entered the bush behind him and waited in silence. Just as he had predicted, the Shadow appeared from out of nowhere. She looked around for Cloud; she obviously knew he was there so she continued to look in the vicinity for any signs of his presence. She paced backward and forward, searched her left and her right. She walked by the bush that concealed Cloud and the pokémon several times, never once stopping to check. She was getting aggravated; his actions showed this in abundance. She walked over to a random tree, and punched it several times. Satisfied with the fact that he was no longer in this area, she leapt onto a low hanging branch, and left the area.

Cloud waited for what seemed like forever in the bush. He was afraid to make the slightest movement. Finally, after much searching within his sub-conscious he found the courage to climb to his feet and jogged quickly toward the Pokémon Dirt House. He spotted the entrance and quickly climbed in. This ‘house’ was exactly like the other, right down to the abnormal vacancy. Cloud began to kneel down, but fell because of the immense pain it caused him.

As he lay there with the tortured pokémon in his hands, he began to wonder whether or not he would even make it to see tomorrow. It was true that he had dodged the Shadows. He even confronted them, and that made him smile for a brief moment. But then his thoughts trailed back to his new dilemma; he had absolutely no energy left to move. He was surprised he had enough to breathe. His adrenaline and rage, the only two things that kept him moving up until now, were gone. He was drained of everything, and felt as if he would never walk again.

What if whatever lives here decides to return? What if it’s no longer friendly? I won’t be able to hold if off, nor run from it…oh well. At least I gave this little guy another chance at life, he thought.

He stared at the ceiling, almost exactly the same as the previous habitat, but with fewer holes in the log. He vision was fading, and his breathing slowed. His thoughts began to meld together, with his mind shutting down readying for a deep sleep. He was going to die, he could feel it. He had drained his life force running from the Shadows and now was going to pay with his life.

As he drifted in and out of consciousness, trying desperately to cling on to his last few moments of life. Realizing it was futile, he let himself die. His eye lids were heavier than a Snorlax and begged Cloud to be closed. So he complied with their requests. But not before he caught sight of a dog-like figure above the log. It was looking directly at him.

Well…at least I’ll still serve some purpose after I’m gone, he said to himself trying to find some peace in death.

But there was nothing…just cold black emptiness of death.

************************************************** *********
Hmm...it's said (by me) that death awaits only those who accept it. Well that's chapter 3 for you. Sorry it took so long. Look for chapter 4 within the next two weeks (school's gonna start soon for me xD nooo!!!). Seeya soon.

Chpater END


Next Time: A Living Legend

Flow like water, flow like water, Chase chanted to himself.

Nylf
1st September 2005, 4:21 PM
;330; Really, really good. Normally I have more to say,(as do the others) but this was so good,( and I'm also still slightly in shock from saber's fic's latest chapter) and impressively deep, I'm dumbstruck. Keep it up!

[Cano]
1st September 2005, 6:35 PM
;330; Really, really good. Normally I have more to say,(as do the others) but this was so good,( and I'm also still slightly in shock from saber's fic's latest chapter) and impressively deep, I'm dumbstruck. Keep it up!
:D Thanks and I'm sooo sad that I can't fully enjoy xXSaberXx's work x( I'm still on chapter 3 ;-;. Also, sorry for the lack of length, it was only 5 pages on MS Word xD. Thanks again SF.

GunsoBalds
1st September 2005, 9:05 PM
really interesting idea of story u got there, a good idea though heh, I like the lengths, not too long but not too short either, fits ur fic right, keep up the good work, and I'll be waiting for the next chappie

[Cano]
2nd September 2005, 4:59 PM
YAY!! Thanks a lot GunsoBalds, I really apprieciate it, and I'm glad you like it. :D

EDIT: I seem to be at a loss of what to do. Should I make chapter 4 a two part chapter or not?

Nylf
2nd September 2005, 8:47 PM
;330; It's your choice, not ours. And anyway, we'll read it either way, and if it's good we'll tell you, and if it's rubbish I'll be as blunt as a circle with you about it. So don't ask us, just do it!

[Cano]
2nd September 2005, 8:50 PM
Alright, alright. Anyways, I'd say ch 4 is halfway done, maybe more, and it's hands down, my longest chapter ever. Hope y'all like long...ness...xD
<SCM>

BrokenDreams
3rd September 2005, 1:48 AM
sigCmugen, i know this may be spam, but just to say, my internet upstairs wont wont so i cant send you the pictures to the other computer and I cannot reply on this computer

xXSaberXx
3rd September 2005, 3:48 AM
Like omfg.

I LOVE IT

Death....and damn that Shadow was mean. Guess you strayed from teh deciever part of that spoil, eh? xPPPPPPP Sorry if I ruined it!

Overall, great description and such. *hands you a BLT* Toodles!

Saber

lone_wolf816
3rd September 2005, 4:05 AM
That was a very emotional chapter... Could use a bit more description but thats ok:p BTW I was wondering where his 'Guirdians' wereXD Keep it up!

;160;-Twisted Anger

Lati-lover
4th September 2005, 3:41 AM
Wow.... That was..






Crap... By far the worst fan fic i ever read...
JK(did i get ya?) Actualy that was better than most books i've read. Come on that should go straight to nintendo because it really got me hooked and i cant wat until u finish. I think u should try to make a game out of this if u can. It looks really good. i have to say that kicks the tar out of my story for school. really good attitudes for the pokemon and people. Amazing description. I have to give it a 10/10(although Cloud seems like a strange name to me..)

[Cano]
4th September 2005, 8:17 PM
From the top!! :D

BrokenDreams: SPAM!! Just kidding, I totally understand, but I got your PM and the links, hope they work.

On-topic: Can't wait till your next review.

xXSaberXx: xDDDD yay she likes! Hey Saber, she likes it! But uh, I'm confused about the 'spoil' part xP PM me and tell me what I'm not getting. Thanks again for reviewing, you rock.

Lone Wolf816/Twisted Anger: Yay, mah fave reviewer is back (mainly because I didn't have to bribe you to read xD here's that other $20 I owe you xP) and I'm glad you liked it. Yeah, that chap was emotional...and maybe I coulda used more description, especially with the Shadows...well thanks anyways :p I apprieciate it.

Lati-Lover: Wow...




That was the worst review I've ever got!! I mean, wtf?! You didn't tell me where I could improve, all it was was a bunch of positive crap!! Thanks for NOTHING!!

Well, chapter 4 is gonna be up maybe by the end of teh week. Here's a spoiler:
|...he will become a "slave" of the "Legendaries," or as the pompous Mew puts it, a 'Chosen One...'| xD Seeya soon.
<SCM>

PS: Lati-Lover....just kidding!!! xDDDDD Gotcha!!! W00T!!! :)

lone_wolf816
4th September 2005, 8:56 PM
Nice spoiler! BTW are you going to have made up legendaries? I'll be awaiting the next chapter.

;160;-Twisted Anger

Nylf
4th September 2005, 8:58 PM
;330; If he isn't, he can use mine. I'm ok with it. Anyway if Sig uses them, it means they rock!

[Cano]
5th September 2005, 12:00 AM
I am using made up Legendaries, but I'm not too good at making up Pokes, so I'm accepting other people's fakes for submissions. On page 2 I posted all the Fakes I'm using so far (Shiny Flygon, I'll have to take a look at your dex soon :) there are definitely some I want to use) and...well you guys got your spoiler ;)
<SCM>

Felix Feral Fezirix
5th September 2005, 1:24 PM
Arrrr...I don't need to go on a field day about grammar again...yay.

Okay, as far as I can see this fic does not require any more lectures on the presentation... And as this is ONLY Chapter 3...I don't have much to say. The story is great...the mysteriousness is okay...and I'm waiting for more. What can I say...

;025; You bozo, now is my turn to talk, since you have nothing to say

What insolence!

;025; Whatevarrrr... you can use 5 of his legends...although I don't think you may incorporate 'em in... PM him to ask for it...

Okay fine, thank you Felix, I shall mail you a box of Pokechow tonight for dinner.

Bashaamo
11th September 2005, 12:00 AM
O_O Chapter 3 is full of violence and bad language. XD
But other than that, I like it. The bad thing is I'm too tired to read long posts...
Keep up the good work. I'll probably be here for the next chapter.
-;257;

lone_wolf816
11th September 2005, 1:36 AM
Oh my god! I love the new banner you got! Thats a way better advertisement then the last one! Anyway update soon!

;196;-Crystal Moon

[Cano]
13th September 2005, 2:33 AM
Felix: Yay randomness! And thanks for reviewing. Although, I'm not too sure how many legendaries I'm gonna use...Reyn...whoops, almost let something slip xD anyways, thanks for reviewing and be sure to come back for more!
blaziken77: xD I thought this thread had died! Thanks for proving me wrong xP and is that a bad thing (referring to chapter 3)? Because if it is, I'll try to tone it down, but really compared to my book I'm writing called the sickness, this isn't any where near full of either. But if that's what you feel, I can't stop you from feeling it, so feel to your heart's content!...that sounds a little awkward, but whatever! Thanks again! :D
Crystal Moon: Thanks :D I like it too. Scrap owns so hardcore. And she says she isn't good with humans, look how amazing Cloud turned out! It amazing, and I love it, though I think my little onimous line in it, underneath the title is a little iffy, but whatever, I'm always gonna feel that way. And I'll update as soon as possible! I just gotta get my laptop back from my aunt /lame excuse. But seriously, chapter four is gonna be long as hell. I've already got more than 5 pages done, and still not close to finishing. It'll no doubt, be the longest chapter yet. I just hope it's turns out to be good...there are some things I think I should cut from it, but I'm not going to. I believe that everything in A Living Legend is important, for their own reasons (character development, etc). So therefore, nothing will be cut! Thank you for your time.

Seeya soon!
CPika;025;:Pika! *both give Peace sign*
<SCM>&<CPika>

UPDATE
I'm still working on Chapter 4, but with the mounting homework from school, my constant visits from the obnoxious headache, and plain out writer's block is causing some major detour-age (new word, look it up if yeah don't believe meh!) so I wouldn't expect it til late this week...at best...what's worse, is I have no idea what to do about chapter 5, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it...this is for anyone who actually enjoys this fic...however few people that might be. Also, a special surprise spoiler to anyone who PMs me w/ "Curious" as the subject ;).
CPika;025;: Piiiii-ka! *thumbs up*
<SCM>&<CPika>

Psychic
13th September 2005, 4:39 AM
Wow, I've finally read the next chapter. W00t!

It was really good, but Cloud is getting even MORE mature now, though you're doing a valliant job trying to tone it down.
Could use a bit more description here and there, especially of surroundings. I don't really see the forest and Cloud's little refuges.

This chapter was very good in length. When I first looked at it it looked too long, then as I read it I descided it was the perfect length. It was short enough to wet my appetite but not so long that it just dragged on for what feels like ages.


One of two mistakes here and there, nothing big. The only one I remember is this one:

Cloud’s breathing slowed, but he fists were still clenched as were his teeth. So much so that his fingernails began to dig into his palms, blood slowly seeping down his fingers.
It shouldn't be two sentences. Not quite sure how to fix it though...(that and I'm too lazy to figure out how to make it work :P)


So, keep up the great work and I honestly can not wait for the next chapter!

~Psychic

[Cano]
13th September 2005, 5:00 AM
Wow, I've finally read the next chapter. W00t!

It was really good, but Cloud is getting even MORE mature now, though you're doing a valliant job trying to tone it down.
Could use a bit more description here and there, especially of surroundings. I don't really see the forest and Cloud's little refuges.

This chapter was very good in length. When I first looked at it it looked too long, then as I read it I descided it was the perfect length. It was short enough to wet my appetite but not so long that it just dragged on for what feels like ages.


One of two mistakes here and there, nothing big. The only one I remember is this one:

It shouldn't be two sentences. Not quite sure how to fix it though...(that and I'm too lazy to figure out how to make it work :P)


So, keep up the great work and I honestly can not wait for the next chapter!

~Psychic
O.O I didn't expect to see you til Friday...O.O
Anyways, thanks for reading ^_^ and you think he's actually getting more mature?...Good. He's suppose to. Remember, he's trying to project that he's older and more mature for his age. I said I'd tone it down, guess it didn't work ;;>> but that's ok, I did my bestest. My description wasn't up to par? Aww man. I thought something was off...well now I know what it was. Maybe I should fix it. And it should be one? Maybe...the semicolon!! *duh duh duuuh!* Here it comes to say the daaaaaaaaaaay! *silence*
^^;;;
So you have a problem with length? *nervous chuckle* So am I gonna haveta shorten chap 4 for ya? Cuz it's gettin to be miiiiiiiighty long. Anyways thanks for reading Psychic. Seeya soon.
CPika;025;:Pi-Pikachu!
<SCM>&<CPika>

Felix Feral Fezirix
13th September 2005, 12:40 PM
Please...If you give us something that's over 100 pages I swear I'll faint...Not over a hundred...Noooooooooooooo....

Psychic
13th September 2005, 11:31 PM
O.O I didn't expect to see you til Friday...O.O
Anyways, thanks for reading ^_^ and you think he's actually getting more mature?...Good. He's suppose to. Remember, he's trying to project that he's older and more mature for his age. I said I'd tone it down, guess it didn't work ;;>> but that's ok, I did my bestest. My description wasn't up to par? Aww man. I thought something was off...well now I know what it was. Maybe I should fix it. And it should be one? Maybe...the semicolon!! *duh duh duuuh!* Here it comes to say the daaaaaaaaaaay! *silence*
^^;;;
So you have a problem with length? *nervous chuckle* So am I gonna haveta shorten chap 4 for ya? Cuz it's gettin to be miiiiiiiighty long. Anyways thanks for reading Psychic. Seeya soon.
CPika;025;:Pi-Pikachu!
<SCM>&<CPika>
Oh, my I had that written in my sig since Wednesday, but had my sig was over 1000 characters long, and if I took that out I knew I'd have to make sure it was only 750, so I just took out that stupid quote...

Anyways, you still need to tone it down a bit more. Like I said, you tried, but in the end, it the overall impression was the he was just too mature. :P

And it's not that description wasn't up to par; you just need a bit more of it.

Oh, I don't have a problem with length. Like I said,

When I first looked at it it looked too long, then as I read it I descided it was the perfect length.
Sure, when I see something that's long (in certain fics that though I love the plot, I just can't get off my lazy butt to read) I try to put off reading it, but your Chapters are good length-wise. And you said it was around four pages long before (that [{]was[/U] you who said that, right)? That's almost short for me.

And again, I was glad to read it!



Felix_the_mutant_pikachu: Please don't spam. Yes, that was spam.


~Psychic

[Cano]
14th September 2005, 4:32 AM
Oh, my I had that written in my sig since Wednesday, but had my sig was over 1000 characters long, and if I took that out I knew I'd have to make sure it was only 750, so I just took out that stupid quote...

Anyways, you still need to tone it down a bit more. Like I said, you tried, but in the end, it the overall impression was the he was just too mature. :P

And it's not that description wasn't up to par; you just need a bit more of it.

Oh, I don't have a problem with length. Like I said,

Sure, when I see something that's long (in certain fics that though I love the plot, I just can't get off my lazy butt to read) I try to put off reading it, but your Chapters are good length-wise. And you said it was around four pages long before (that [{]was[/U] you who said that, right)? That's almost short for me.

And again, I was glad to read it!



Felix_the_mutant_pikachu: Please don't spam. Yes, that was spam.


~Psychic
Oh, ok xP we'll update regularly, if it's within your power.

And do I have too? It's part of the story. And it's mainly accidental...I'm writing a book (to be published) with the main characters being more my age, so maybe that's why I forget Cloud's age, and therefore, his maturity. I'll tone it down...for you >> if it'll make it better.

Okey dokey, more describing then ^_^.

Oh so no problem with length? Great! This chap is like seven pages xD so I hope you guys are ok with it...if not, I'm sorry to say, too bad.

I'm glad you like to read ^_^.

Please...If you give us something that's over 100 pages I swear I'll faint...Not over a hundred...Noooooooooooooo....
No not 100, that's just ridiculous...but it's 7. :p

Progress: Right now I'm proof reading it and adding more description to it. I'll post before the end of tonight. Seeya soon.
CPika;025;:Piiiiiiiikaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
<SCM>&<CPika>

[Cano]
19th September 2005, 5:15 AM
[Rt-15+]
This chapter contains strong language, violence and death.

A Living Legend

It stared down at the little human child which was no longer moving. Lazily, it walked around the gigantic tree and into the entrance of what used to be home to wild Sandslash along their young. It was quite a large space; the dirt from underneath the tree was dug out, creating a little room with walls of dirt crumpling slowly. It was several feet underneath the tree which allowed for sufficient support for the tree, as well as a hiding place for the Sandslash.

It walked closer to the human, unafraid because the human’s life force was no longer taking residence in this world. As it stared down at the lifeless carcass, it couldn’t help but feel remorse. True, it was the humans that started destroying the habitats of pokémon, for seemingly no reason, and it couldn’t say that it wasn’t delighted in the death of another human. But something about this one was different. Because of this now dead human, still clutching the tiny pokémon in his cold grasp, Reynile was able to see that his suspicions of the human species were not true for all of them.

Reynile was a slender dog-like pokémon. It was colored a pale light blue, with a beige underbelly. Its tail was rather thick, like the body of an Arbok, but not nearly as long. Tufts of wispy white hair served as its ears. It was a mysterious pokémon, not only to humans, but to other pokémon as well. Several human and pokémon alike even went as far as to devalue its existence. But it didn’t mind; years taught it that the ignorance of some would remain that way. Whenever humans encounter something beyond their comprehension, they brand it with a label. With pokémon that label was ‘Legendary’.

Reynile did not however, consider himself ‘Legendary’; not in the least. It was not egotistical, such as Ho-oh or Mew and therefore such titles meant nothing to him. Focusing his attention once more on the human, he realized its gender through useful observation; its face was chubby, which indicated its age of about 9 life cycles; its brow was wide yet smooth, another indication of age; its body was muscular for its age, it shoulders broad, and from this Reynile determined its gender. It was a boy, of 9 life cycles. This knowledge did not bring the pokémon any satisfaction however; only the knowledge of knowing that the boy had barely experience life before he was exterminated.

Reynile’s expression softened and became it became saddened.

|This child risked its life in the name of valiance and honor. I hadn’t ever expected to see such manner in a human. This complicates my views…maybe humans aren’t to blame…not entirely.| Reynile confirmed.

It looked down at the tiny pokémon in the dead boy’s hands. The pokémon he had fought so bravely to protect was asleep, unaware that its savior was gone. It was an odd little pokémon, odd because of its uncommon appearance. Reynile deduced it to be a mutation, something not at all as rare as it sounded in the pokémon world. It was a tiny turtle, with a rather long tale that resembled a cane because of its ending in a swirl. Its skin was red-orange in color with a brown turtle shell covering its entire torso.

|An odd color for a Squirtle. I wonder whether its powers were affected by the mutation?| he wondered aloud.

Suddenly Reynile’s wispy ears picked up a rustling sound behind him. He quickly turned, baring his teeth toward his attacker. The yellow tiger-striped dog growled menacingly, its snout curled into a deadly snarl, its large canines oozing with saliva. It was ready for a fight; a fight to the death.

|I have no quarrel with you, Arcanine. Leave me be, and no harm shall come to you!|

“Arrrr-argh, rawrf!” the Arcanine barked in reply. It showed no fear of this mysterious pokémon.

|I repeat: I have no quarrel with you. Stand down.|

Reynile was becoming annoyed; this Arcanine didn’t seem to listen to reason, nor think logically. The curiously dangerous pokémon threatening Reynile sniffed the air, never once letting down its guard when it suddenly stopped, its eyes falling on the corpse of the boy. The Arcanine became ever more ferocious. It snarled, “Rrrrrarghrrr. Raghrrr.”

|What? I did no such thing! I found this human like this, I know nothing of him, nor his past, and would have never even so much as wasted a breath on him as long as he leave me be.|

The Arcanine didn’t seem to believe Reynile, and was ready to pounce when a light blue aura surrounded its entire body. The aura seemed to calm the Arcanine, and its snarl lost ferocity as it relaxed its snout. Its tongue hung out lazily and its eyes drooped almost as if it were to collapse with exhaustion. Appearing from the shadows emerged a blue humanoid pokémon with black plates covering its torso and shoulders as well as its ankles. If Reynile hadn’t already known of it being a pokémon, he would have easily mistaken it as a human, thanks to its long light blue mustache. It had ears that protruded its head and stood a good foot from it, and narrow black calming eyes. Each three fingered hand held a spoon. Its left hand was pointed at the Arcanine and covered in a sky blue aura, its first and second finger outstretched and forming a forty-five degree angle. Its eyes glowed, the color similar to the aura surrounding its hand. Reynile recognized the attack to be that of Calm Mind.

The new pokémon spoke politely, acknowledging the immense power within Reynile and respecting it. It apologized, “Alakazam ala akaza. Ala…aka alakaza.”

|I see. Very well, I’ll excuse his behavior, this ‘Cano.’ But who is this human to you? He seemed content on dueling me to the death over him.| Reynile stated calmly.

The Alakazam’s gaze shifted to the lying heap that was once Cloud, and its eyes grew wide with shock. Tears began to well up in its sky blue eyes. It tried desperately to regain its composure, to speak to Reynile. It explained to Reynile as it held back its sobs, that he was their trainer’s son, and that they were in the forest watching over him. Reynile scoffed, |‘Scyko’ was it? Well I dare say, it seems you have failed. As you can plainly see, the child is dead.|

Scyko fell to his knees in despair, releasing his hold on Cano. Cano’s face became contorted as he tried to show two different emotions at once; anger and sorrow. He had finally decided on the ladder and quickly ran to Cloud’s side, as if to disprove Reynile’s observation, but to no avail; Cloud was indeed dead. A sadness with no equal showed on Cano’s face. If dogs could cry, tears wouldn’t stop streaming down his face. He threw back his mane covered head and let out a high pitched howl.

Pokémon from all over the forest (whatever little that had stayed in this godforsaken wasteland) felt the pain and sorrow in Cano’s howl, which echoed in the forest. Cano’s cry was even carried miles away, to the town of Hyd. In the quiet country scene, a man could be seen kicking open his front door in a panic. His crazy black-as-night hair waved silently in the ominous wind, sweat beads present on his forehead. His eyes widened and filled with tears, he whispered, “No…” and dashed toward Verd Forest, clearing his front gate with a single hop.

Cano lowered his head and stared at Cloud’s body. Were it not for his body’s lack of breath, you wouldn’t be able to tell that Cloud was in fact no longer among the living. His skin was only just starting to lose its pigment, his lips purple with the cold kiss of death still lingering. Cano quickly stifled a yelp of pain; his emotional pain was turning physical and his heart could no longer bear the weight of his sorrow. So he lay down next to Cloud and yelped over and over uncontrollably, his paws over his face.

Scyko was in his own little world, a dark cloud of pain and malice hanging over his head, his eyes clouded by the darkness of the shadows being cast by his head. He had failed…he let his trainer’s one and only son die…and in a way, it had felt as if he had let his own son die. He had helped watch over Cloud since the day he was born, back when he was still a Kadabra. He was like a second father to the boy; he changed his diapers, he fed him, and even played with him.

Back then, when Cloud was born, Scyko had made a promise to Chase and Annette. Back then it seemed like promises could be kept indefinitely; like the only way a promise couldn’t be kept was if hell froze over. Back then Silhouette didn’t exist…

“Scyko.”

“Kadabra?”

“I want you to promise me something. Something important,” Chase went on.

“Kadabra?” he said nodding.

“I want you to promise me that you’ll keep my son from harm, no matter what the cost.”

“Kada?!” Scyko said taken aback.

Chase had never asked anything such as this of him, save for when he found his bride Annette. Chase was a tall young man, and a damn good Pokémon Trainer, as well as friend. So Scyko knew that Chase would never ask anything that wasn’t within his power to control. Scyko regained his composure and answered quizzically, “Ada abra?”

“Hmm, you know Cano, of course he promised. That guy would jump over hell and high water for me. And believe it or not, for you as well!” he said, turning to Scyko with a smile.

The sun was bright and fiery as ever, there on Cinnabar Island, the sea washing up on the shore, wave after wave crashing noisily on the sandy beach beneath their feet. The salty sweet smell of the ocean wafted in the breeze. It was days like this that even non-Psychic pokémon could look out into the horizon and swear they could see into the future…

Positive he could keep his promise, Scyko turned to his messy black haired friend, a would-be smile on his face and replied matter-of-factly, “KA-dabra!” and gave Chase a thumbs up with a wink. Chase realized how hilarious his Kadabra looked, and couldn’t help laughing. Scyko turned red with embarrassment; had he still not grasped this human concept? After all these years of training and living with Chase, and he still was clueless.

Chase saw the worried expression on the tall pokémon’s face and reassured him that he had finally got it right. Grinning from ear to ear, Chase returned the thumbs up and the wink chuckling the whole time. They stood there, laughing there heads off, the gentle sea breeze kicking up miniature sandstorms at their feet.

Yeah…days like this, it was almost a shame that it was so peaceful…

But that was the past and Scyko believed differently now. He was ashamed of himself, for thinking the future was set in stone. He, being a Psychic-type, should have known better. His stupidity caused him to fail his best friend for the second time. The first was three years ago…when Silhouette first appeared.

He knew Cano had felt the same, that he had failed Chase three years prior, though he refused to show it then. But now all of Cano’s bottled emotions were just pouring out of him; Cloud’s death was the nail in the coffin. He could no longer bottle his emotions, and his front was falling apart right before Scyko’s eyes. And Scyko was clueless as to how he should go about consoling his life long friend.

While it hurt Scyko to see Cloud dead, it hurt him even more to see a great pokémon such as Cano lose control and break down. His heart was heavy, and his thoughts were consumed with sadness, which was very bad. Whenever a Psychic pokémon loses the perfect balance between his different feelings, it throws off their psychic powers, causing many things to go awry. It was no different for Scyko; bushes were being uprooted, rocks thrown this way and that. His inability to control his emotions was placing everyone around him in danger, but he never noticed it. He was so consumed in his own sadness neither he nor Cano realized Reynile had been speaking to them.

|…while I’m delighted to see another human dead, I am however saddened nonetheless. He died saving the Pokémon still clutched in his dead grasp. I would be ashamed of myself if I were to leave here, and not at least try to help him.|

Scyko looked up at Reynile, as if he just noticed its presence.

“Al? ...alakazam?” Scyko inquired.

|I mean, that I’m willing to use the Forbidden Magic. His life force may be gone, but I may be able to retrieve it.| it continued.

“…Alakaz. Ala al kazam?”

|Because he taught me something today. Not all humans are alike. While there may be humans that enjoy torturing and killing pokémon, there are many that are opposed to this behavior. Cloud, as you called him, showed this in abundance and then some, by risking his life for what he believed in. You must understand however; by completing this act, not only will he be branded for life as a ‘slave’ of the ‘Legendaries’, or as Lugia and Ho-oh put it, a ‘Chosen One’. He will also be linked to me. He may not be the same ever again. EVER. Shall I go ahead with the act?| Reynile finished.

Cano jumped at this opportunity. He yelped in approval, wagging his tail furiously from side to side. Reynile took his answer as a “Yes,” and turned to Scyko for his vote. Scyko stared in bewilderment. As if it really needed to ask that question. But then his expression changed, as he considered the cons; a ‘Chosen One’ is what he’d be turned into. He may also never be the same. Was that better than death?

You must understand, to be a ‘Chosen One’ is better described as a ‘slave’ as Reynile put it. Ever since the corruption of man, the ‘Legendaries’ had decided against the need for a ‘Chosen One’ and therefore made the act of finding and making humans ‘Chosen Ones’ forbidden. But Reynile wasn’t for these ‘rules and regulations’ of being a Legendary; he was not to be controlled by anyone, least of all a pompous windbag such as Mew.
Ultimately, Scyko decided it better than death, so he agreed.

|Very well.|

Reynile closed its eyes and an eerie glow began to surround it, as it muttered words too ancient to describe. It continued to mutter, quivering slightly with each ancient word. It began to shake violently the more it muttered. Then it suddenly opened its eyes! Its blood-red eyes were now covered by a white mist, slowly moving from the center of his eyes to the outside like tiny ripples in a vast ocean.

It began to shout the ancient language uttering every syllable with profound pronunciation, the very sound of its voice like nails on a chalkboard to any living thing able to hear its shouts; Cano buried his head in his paws, howling in pain. Scyko had managed to summon an aura to shield himself from the harming power of the ancient dialogue. But it was soon rendered as helpless as Cano; it took too much out of Scyko to maintain the shield. He began to violently grab his ears and pulling them down along his face as far as he could.

Reynile was speaking faster now, so fast the words seemed to blend with each other. Then he suddenly stopped and his eyes began to glow a fiery red, rippling faster and faster. There the ancient pokémon stood; minutes passed with no change in his appearance. He was as rigid and stiff as a frozen block of Magikarp after being submitted to a devastating Blizzard attack. Next, a wispy white cloud of smoke began to escape from its mouth; Scyko recognized this to be Reynile’s life force. It was coming from deep within its body. The life force began to grow till it was relatively the size of a large apple. After completely exiting Reynile’s body, it began to float gingerly over Cloud’s body, rippling just as Reynile’s eyes were, working its way from the center out.

|Now comes the hard part.| Reynile said with a smirk.
_____________________
To be continued...

[Cano]
19th September 2005, 5:33 AM
Continued...
______________________

The man was running at his full speed now, tears streaming down his face, his every step like a shock from an enthusiastic Pikachu, to his heart. His son couldn’t be dead, he just couldn’t! He had his two best friends promise him that they’d do everything and anything in their power to protect him. They would die for him! With the trust and loyalty of these two how could he believe otherwise? But he continued to run anyway, memories of Cinnabar Island replaying in his head.

Cano came strolling beside him, still a mere Growlithe; Chase didn’t have the heart to evolve him. That and he saw no reason to change him. As Cano sat down next to Chase, he stared at the two in bewilderment; why were they laughing so hard? Chase looked down at his puppy with a toothy grin and pointed his index finger toward his other pokémon. Cano’s attention sifted from his trainer to Scyko. He was still posing with his thumb up, and his left eye in a wink. At this sight Cano began laughing as well, making Scyko even more embarrassed than before.

Scyko sat down on the sand, allowing the water to crash at his feet. He was actually relaxed, quite a rarity for a Psychic-type. Chase noticed this, and walked up beside him and sat down. He then began to gaze out into the bright blue sky. Cano walked over and jumped on his lap. Cano laid on his back, his belly demanding to be scratched. Chase complied and began scratching Cano’s yellow and black belly.

“Y’know looking out on this horizon, I can clearly remember the day I met you guys. I remember every last detail of the encounters; the place, the exact time, everything. Cano, you were a tortured and forgotten pup. And Scyko, you were a calm and tormented Abra. The both of you aren’t exactly normal, and I remember the way you were treated by your ‘brethren’ because of it.

I never thought that pokémon would be so cruel because of your differences. But I didn’t care. You two were different, but not in the way they saw. You two were stronger, more willing to prove yourselves to any and everyone. You two were more determined to prove your worth. That’s why I befriended you two. Your determination to give it everything you got is what got me as far as I went as a trainer.

And in the end it paid off, didn’t it? League Champions…I remember that day well too. So many people laughed at me, told me I was never going to win because I used a basic pokémon. They told me that by not evolving you two my ignorance as a trainer was showing. That you’d never win because you both were too weak. They told me evolution would lead to power, enough to beat the Elite.

But they were wrong. Evolution is not the key to power; it’s your drive, your determination, and most of all your friends that ultimately decide your strength. And the two of you have both those elements in abundance. You’ve even inspired me on more than one occasion! That’s why I know that I can trust you two to help me protect my family.

“I know you two will never let me down. You’re both too strong for that,” he finished.

He tripped, lost in his memories, and tumbled down a hillside littered with trees and rocks. He stomach made contact with a low-hanging tree branch covered in serrated brown leaves. His leg almost broke no thanks to several rocks crammed together forming a trap for any foot stupid enough to enter it. Rolling down the dirt hill, he slid to the bottom relatively unharmed and got shakily to his feet. His face was dirty with the combination of tears and dirt, he eyes stinging in pain from either crying or the dirt; he didn’t know which.

He tried desperately to look for something to clean his eyes out, though this was more difficult than he thought. Finally he spotted water dripping of a triangular leaf, into a small bowl-like rut along the side of the tree. He walked over to the rut and splashed his face clean. Face wet and water dripping from the tip of his nose and chin he gazed into the puddle, watching the ripples move slowly outward, violently stopping whenever they reached the edge of the “bowl”.

Though it was too dark to see much of anything, he could’ve sworn he saw Cloud’s face beaming back at him. He smiled slightly at the memory of his precious son, and almost forgot about his untimely death. A droplet falling from his chin caused the puddle to ripple again, making his son’s face disappear as a result.

Brought back to the harsh reality of the world around him, his smile quickly disappeared and Chase stood up. He was just about to return to his travels, when he felt a chill run up his spine; the kind that seems to house at least three other chills inside the first set. This shiver was so massive, that he twitched violently unable to control himself. His goose bumps seem to beget more goose bumps, and his sadness was replaced with an indescribable terror. He had felt this once before, that was crystal clear. A terror like this is hard for one to forget easily. The hair on the back of his neck began to stand on end, like a crowd of inactive Ekans just seemingly raising their heads at the passing wind.

They would be upon him shortly…or were they already there, cloaked by the darkness, watching him waiting for their time to strike. After much personal deliberation, Chase believed the ladder to be true.

“Show yourselves!” he shouted into the nothingness.

Silence. Then out of the dark came three figures heavily cloaked in black. Two of them had duffel bags slung over their shoulders. Chase’s face cringed at the mere sight of them.

What a sickening, heinous, loathsome, hideous group of creatures. If they did anything to him…if they hurt my son…I’ll kill them!

He took a defiant step forward, his fists clenched and his eyes narrow.

“What business do you have here, Shadows?”

“Business that is none of yours,” answered a feminine voice with no origin.

It cackled to itself after seeing Chase flinch. Chase steadied himself; he could not help it, there was just something about them that scared him, no matter how much he tried to hide it. Restoring his defiant attitude and posture, he stood up straight and glared angrily at the Shadows.

“I see. Well I have no time to waste with the likes of you. I have more pressing matters at hand,” Chase snorted, showing as much disrespect as possible.

Scoffing, he cracked his neck and began to walk, but was stopped by an ominous laughter.

“More important than us?” laughed a new voice.

Chase noticed this voice was coming from the figure to the right; it was the only one without a duffel bag, and it’s shoulders bounced violently as it laughed.

This Shadows’ voice was different, as if it echoed before it was released from its vocal cords, making it sound as if two genderless voices spoke simultaneously. One was a higher pitch than the other, but both were menacing nonetheless. Chase choked back a laugh.

“Please, your presence merely annoys me, nothing more. Now if you’ll kindly shut the **** up, I’ll be on my way,” Chase retorted defiantly.

The Shadow on the extreme left looked taken aback by this statement. Smirking, Chase again began to walk toward them, hoping this time he would finally make it passed them. But again he was denied; pwned even.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?!” she screamed in disgust, turning to the Shadow on the extreme right, “How dare he speak to us that way Myner? We are Shadows! We’re above this disgusting worm! He owes us the respect and power that comes with being a Shadow. I say we teach him a lesson!”

“No, Niyimee. Let him go, we’ve wasted enough time in this forest, especially after our encounter with that boy,” the one with the dual voice replied.

So its name was Myn…wait! Did it say something about a boy!

“A boy?! You saw a boy in these woods?”

Chase had lost all control. He didn’t care about leaving anymore; not until they told him where his son was. They knew the whereabouts of his son, and they where going to tell him what he wanted to know, one way or the other.

“Well, I seem to have struck a nerve huh?”

“Just tell me what you know!” he growled in frustration and anger. Myner merely laughed.

“Answer me damn it!”

“Why should I? This is so much more fun, watching you writhe in pain as I torment you.”

“Where is he?” Chase growled.

“What if we don’t want to tell you, hmm? What if you want to watch you suffer some more!” laughed the female known as Niyimee.

“YOU’LL REGRET THOSE WORDS!”

Chase dashed toward them, fists clenched and raised high. The middle figure stepped forward after passing his duffel to his empty handed partner. He then sped toward Chase with unimaginable speed.

Whoa he’s fast! But it doesn’t matter, because no one can beat me! Chase told himself pulling back his fist before launching it toward his opponent.

As if he had performed Mirror Move, the Shadow did the same. With every fist Chase threw, the Shadow threw the exact same punch; their fists met over and over again with several loud “Cracks!” They then began to throw punches wilder than ever before, matching each other blow for blow, blocking each and every attack from the other by launching the exact same in defense.

I can’t win like this! I never was one for taking the offensive. Better back off, so I can gain the upper hand, he thought, jumping several yards back. Confused, his opponent stood still, until Chase taunted him with the old “Come and get me” hand gesture, (also known as “flipping the bird”). Enraged, his opponent made a mad dash toward him.

Flow like water, flow like water, Chase chanted to himself.

He was closer now.

Flow like water, flow like water.

He threw his punch. It was on a collision course aimed straight at Chase’s face. Chase grinned and stepped to his left. Dodging effortlessly as if he were water flowing down a quiet stream, Chase then guided the already propelled fist straight into the ground.

“What the-?” choked the Shadow.

He kneeled there for a while on staring at his trapped hand. He struggled to free his hand, but to no avail; it was stuck good. He was at Chase’s mercy. The other two looked on from afar.

“Hmm, interesting. He used Syer’s own speed against him to drive his fist deep into the ground, thereby preventing him from moving. Very interesting,” observed Myner.

“What do you mean interesting Myner?! Syer is at that worm’s mercy!” Niyimee screeched taking a threatening step toward Myner, “are you gonna to sit back and watch our comrade get the **** be outta him?!”

Chase was snickering above ‘Syer,’ a white hot fury burning in his eyes.

“So,” he began, “now will you tell me where the boy is?”

“He-he, you think you can scare me?!” Syer spat back.

“Wrong ANSWER!” Chase shouted, kicking Syer as hard as he could in his gut.

Syer coughed in pain, dripping spit unto the forest floor.

“SYER! **** this and **** you, you stubborn inconsiderate *****! I am going to put a stop to this, whether you like it or not!”

“No Niyimee! Stand DOWN!”

“Screw you Myner! You’d lead us straight to hell if you had your way!” she shouted, throwing her duffel bag to the floor as she ran into the fray.

Chase was ready to give him a second helping, but instead ducked swiftly under Niyimee’s attempt to ‘behead’ him, or punch him, he couldn’t tell which, nor could he summon the will to care. He watched her sail over him, landing softly to his right side, making hardly any sound. She turned on her heels, ready to strike again.

“Grr, how did he know?” Niyimee screamed aloud. “Humph, doesn’t matter. I’ll get him this time!”

Chase grinned and steadied himself, readying for her next attack. She again ran towards him, arms flung behind her as she ran. When she had covered about half the distance between them, she made a leaping kick directed toward Chase’s face. He scoffed at her pathetic attempt; she had jumped way too early, and he could have easily jumped to avoid this attack, which is what he had planned to do…until he realized his left foot wouldn’t leave the ground! His foot must have got caught on something. He looked quickly down to see Syer on his back, his right hand still deep in the ground, his left tightly grasping Chase’s left ankle.

****! If I don’t do something fast, I’ll be kissing the bottom of her foot!

Quickly as he could, Chase readied himself once more, then brought his right foot in front of him. Just as she was ready to hit him, he lifted his leg underneath her breasts, resting it on her abdomen. He then used his foot to guide her over him as he fell back, catching himself with his hands. Using her momentum, and his own strength, he quickly flung her into the nearest tree.
As soon as she hit, he pushed off the ground so as to sail over Syer, bringing Shadow back to his kneeling position. But instead of catching himself as he hit the ground on Syer’s left, Chase used gravity to help him deliver another powerful kick to Syer’s gut with his right leg. This one caused him to cough up blood, along with his spittle.

Chase hit the ground with his back, hard and it knocked the wind out of him. His eyes wide with pain, he blinked and let the tears flow as he used his hands and feet to lift himself up. Wincing in pain, he slowly got to his feet, and broke free from Syer’s grip. Then came a sound that sent chills up Chase’s spine; a sound that made his hair once again stand on end.

“AIEEEEEEEEEEE-YAHHHHHHHH!”

Before he had the chance to see where the banshee-like screech came from, Niyimee was on his back, her legs wrapped around him and her hands gripping and pulling on his crazy black hair.

“AHHHHHHHH! YOU *****!”

Chase ran in circles trying to fling her off, all the while screaming in pain, “Ahhh! Get off getoffgetoffgetoffgetoffgetoff!”

“I’ve got you know you bouncy little Spoink!” she howled with glee, tightening her grip and pulling harder and harder.

Chase couldn’t stand the pain anymore. He thought as fast and coherently as he could and finally came up with a solution.

“Screw it! If you don’t want get off by yourself, I’ll make you get off!”

So he ran top speed toward the nearest tree. You’ll let go, one way or the other *****.

“You wouldn’t!” she dared, a hint of fear in her voice.

“Try me,” he spat back with a grin.

One thing to know about Chase is that he’s crazy enough to do anything…no wait…he’s just crazy, period.

Once he was within two yards of the tree, he leapt toward it and turned in mid-air; he was planning to create a Shadow-sandwich, using the tree and himself as the ‘bread’, and with Niyimee being the ‘meat.’ Screaming in panic, Niyimee jumped off at the last second, like Chase knew she would. Taking this opportunity, he struck with his foot the tree before he could crash into it, and kicked off into the stale open air after her. In the air she was helpless; because she was already evading an attack, Chase had the upper hand. He easily sailed over her, grabbing her cloaks as he cleared over her flying body. Pulling the cloaks over her head, he began to fall like a rock headed straight for the ground.

I’ll have to hit the ground before her, he thought.

So he let go of her capes and propelled himself downward, landing heavily with a small sandstorm kicking up in his wake. Since he landed before her he was able to catch her; no matter how crazy he was, he would never harm a woman.

When he caught her, she was still covered in her cloak, so she began trying to wriggle herself out of the mess he put her in. In the midst of her struggling, she managed to throw off her hood, revealing the face of a confused girl. Chase stared at her bewildered; she was barely older than his son.

He let air slip between his clenched teeth, and dropped her before she could regain her composure. She fell with a cute “Ow!” and began to rub her bottom in anger. She was just about to speak when he raised his hand to stop her.

“Stand down girl, your fight is over. Get up again, and you’ll regret it,” he warned her.

She looked ready to complain, as was her nature, but a glance at Chase’s expression and all she could say was “Eeep!” and crawled to the nearest tree; Chase’s face was hard and cold looking, his mouth straight as an arrow, his brow more wrinkled than the ‘skin’ of a Geodude; he was not kidding around. Sure that she had gotten the message (she was sobbing quietly, her hands wrapped tightly around the tree) he then turned to the bleeding Shadow.

“Now, back to the ‘interrogation,’” he said with a snicker, walking back toward the wounded Syer, cracking his knuckles.

“He is deeper in the forest. He ran off after grabbing our third ‘package.’ I had sent Niyimee after him, but unfortunately, he didn’t turn up, and neither did our p…’package,’” Myner told him.

Chase stopped his knuckles in mid crack and his foot hovering inches off the ground. Taking a step back he chuckled, saying “So, you’ve finally decided to speak up. I had forgotten you were even there.”

He turned his cold stare on the last remaining Shadow.

“What was in this ‘package’?” he questioned.

There came no answer from the Shadow. Only the howling of the wind could be heard. Chase became angry and posed his question once more. Still no answer. Thinking it was none of his concern either way, he was prepared to drop it and continue his search for his son.

Myner’s voice stopped him as she said, “He was severely hurt when we encountered him. And if Niyimee couldn’t find him, he’s probably dead or dying. In any case, I wouldn’t expect you’ll find him ali-” she began before Chase interrupted.

“That’s enough! Not another word or I’ll bash your face in!”

His face was darkened as he stared at Myner, hate clearly visible in his eyes. He stared coldly at her for another few seconds then turned his gaze toward the duffel bags at her feet.

“I suppose those duffel bags are exactly like the ‘package’ my son ‘stole.’ Would I be wrong to assume such a thing?”

Before Myner could react, Chase had already grabbed the two remaining bags and was heading in the direction they had come from. Before she could even turn around he was gone, disappeared into the darkness. She cursed herself, for now she had lost all of the packages.

“Damn it! Now we’re empty-handed. Master isn’t-” she began, but once again became interrupted; this time by an unseen, unheard voice.

“…Hmm…I see. Very well Master, I understand. We will return, as planned. Niyimee! Syer! Pick yourselves up, we’re leaving.”

She turned on her heels and continued on her way, failing to notice the shivering Niyimee, and bleeding Syer as she walked.
_________________

Reynile’s life force, wispy as ever still floated over Cloud’s body as if waiting for something, like a signal or a command. Then slowly, something began to appear next to it. Something red and wispy, growing ever bigger next to Reynile’s life force. It grew till it was at least three times bigger than its white counterpart; it was Cloud’s life force. Reynile was able to bring it back from limbo. Scyko stared in amazement, surprised that Reynile could actually keep its word.

|Now comes the hard part. It requires both of the life forces to combine into one new one, but numerous things could go wrong. Cloud’s life force could reject mine, or vice versa, or worse still, my life force could completely over power his. This would transform him into a Reynile like myself.|

Scyko was taken aback by this new knowledge. He couldn’t possibly continue with this charade, now that he knew all the possible outcomes.

“ALA!? Alakaza al!” he shouted in protest.

|Why do you think this power is forbidden?| it retorted, a hint of anger present.

Scyko couldn’t answer; he had heard stories of humans disappearing mysteriously, of multiple sightings of Legendary pokémon, but had never believed either of them nor did he think they would be connected. He looked on at the two life forces, floating inches above Cloud’s torso. Was he still willing to risk it? What if Cloud wasn’t strong enough to fight off Reynile’s life force?

He turned to Cano for strength and got a Double Kick to the face. Cano knew exactly what Scyko was thinking, and Scyko knew why he had kicked him. How could he ever suspect Cloud of not having enough strength? He was after all Chase’s son. And besides, to come this far just to turn back seemed brainless. Scyko looked up at Reynile and gave him a nod, but it was so much more than that. It was confidence and hope all bottled into one simple gesture. Reynile’s heart smiled, and he said, |Very well. I will continue with the ritual.|

Reynile focused his attention on the two floating life forces and began to chant the ancient dialect once again. His voice started out as nothing more than a whisper, but was slowly gaining amplitude. Soon his chants reached a deafening screech, forcing Cano to yelp in pain, and Scyko to scream in agony as he pulled on his ears. Harder and harder he pulled as if he was trying to yank them from his very skull. But their cries were drowned out by the chanting which was gaining more and more volume with every uttered word.

The words of the Ancients were those not meant for average pokémon ears, so it was understandable to Reynile to see Scyko and Cano in such pain. The reason was these words created mental images in ones brain; images of the past, of when even the Ancients and the Legendaries were still but mere hatchlings. These images were not meant for pokémon other than the Legendaries, and thereby caused all others great pain. It required a full understanding of the past, as well as the use of ones entire mental capacity. Pokémon of this day and age barely even use half of their brain matter, so you ca imagine how different it would be for them to instanteously use all of it whenever they fell within earshot of the ancient dialect.

Reynile began to speak faster, trying desperately to finish the ritual after noticing the blood streaming from Cano’s ears; any more exposure to the ancient language, and he may very well kill the poor beasts. He voice began to speed up to unimaginable proportions, like someone had pressed fast-forward. It became so fast that it wasn’t audible and this released the grippingly painful hold on Scyko and Cano. Exhausted from the pain, Cano and Scyko took long deep breaths, their bodies trying to naturally return to normal. As they tried to regain their normal breathing patterns, they stood staring at Reynile watching him work the magic that came with being a Legendary. It was the most fascinating thing either pokémon had ever seen in their entire lives; and their lives had been filled to the brim with any imaginable adventure or obstacle in the world. They had almost believed it to be over. But it wasn’t. Reynile uttered one final word, but this word was different. It was still ancient, but not in the same way as the others. Reynile opened its mouth.

“Rykukansa!” Reynile roared its voice carried out into the forest, echoing in the darkness.

The word rung in their ears as they howled in pain and violently thrashed on the ground underneath the gigantic tree which was Cloud’s grave. Scyko’s psychic powers were again thrown out of whack, as he lifted dirt clods and uprooted plants. Cano’s howls reached a pitch that had dogs from every corner of the forest howling in pain. Static electricity began to surge through Cano’s body as he howled. It jumped from his body and shocked Sycko, who yelped in pain and uprooted a mighty oak three yards away.

As the tree crashed to the floor and the two pokémon flailed on the dirt, Cloud’s life force was combining with Reynile’s. It was an interesting struggle of which no outcome could be predetermined. The combining life forces swirled in a torrent of white and red, each trying to overpower the other. Even though Reynile’s life force was a smaller amount compared to Cloud’s, it was steadily overpowering his. At one time the entire mass of life force was completely white, and Reynile’s heart skipped a beat. However, it quickly changed colors and Reynile breathed a sigh of relief.

If my life force overpowers the boy’s, there will be no way to hide what I have done. At least if he remains human, they won’t figure it out, it thought to itself.

Oh ho, but I have my dear friend, came a voice from within Reynile’s own mind. It chuckled lightly to itself; how could it think that it was alone this whole time?

Rukario, Reynile thought aloud, speaking to the one and only Legendary worthy of its respect, it’s been long since last we spoke.

Too long my friend, too long… it thought in return.

Rukario was a tall pokémon with a human like figure; its chest adorned a spike in the center. Its face ended in a snout similar to a dog’s, while its ears owned appendages that looked similar to two pairs of two strands of hair. Its arms were human like in shape and muscle tone, with spikes erupting from the backs of its paws which acted as its hands. Its thighs were wide, most likely due to an excessive amount of hair, with skinny canine like legs ending in paws.

Its colors where blue, vanilla and black; blue calves and arms, and a blue face and ears along with a blue tail bent at its end. Black was the color of its four paws, legs under its thighs, as well as its “hair” behind its ears. Black was the cross shaped pattern across its face, like bags underneath its eyes. Black were also its shoulders, as well as a “belt” below its stomach. Its chest was completely covered in vanilla hair surrounding the spike in the center.
The human dog pokémon was inside the gigantic grave maker over Cloud’s body. It leaned backed on the soft black wall of the inside of the tree, its arms folded and its stale, silent red eyes covered by the veil of its eyelids. It gathered its thoughts, and then spoke to Reynile again. To keep their conversation, and Rukario’s presence unknown, they continued to speak only to each other, through a mental link.

So this child risked his life for a Squirtle? An amazing feat of bravery for a human; truly amazing really and interesting as well. What do you believe were his reasons for this selfless act? Rukario pondered.

He was being chased by an annoying female of his species. She was mocking him constantly as she searched; he hid from her, as if his and the Squirtle’s very lives were in danger. I also sensed a lot of pain in his heart before he passed on. My speculation is that he simply couldn’t stand idle and watch a pokémon be hurt, Reynile replied.

Awe inspiring...they never cease to amaze me, these humans. They capture pokémon and treat them as tools, to best one another, masking this ‘Master/Servant’ relationship with the falsehood of friendship. They even torment and hurt them…yet here is a mere child, dying so that a pokémon may live. Heh, it chuckled to itself, a smirk spreading across its lips.

He will be a legend among pokémon. He will be the reminder that not all humans are as vile as they seem. There may be hope yet for this world, Rukario finished.

It opened its eyes and surveyed the hollow tree trunk in which he had taken refuge. It was moldy and old, and black as the fur on its body. The inside was also moist and soft; an imprint of Rukario’s body was made in its wall. So this was where he was when a legend was being reborn.

************************************************** ********************
Well that's Chapter Four...sorry it took soo long. Well it's a record 12 pages long! WOW! Anyways, hope y'all like it.

Chapter END


Next Time: Sunshine No More
Darkness, emptiness and loneliness…so this was purgatory. Or was it? Cloud wasn’t sure…he had often wondered about this in life. He laid away nights, thinking of the many different answers. He never liked what he came up with…it scared him.

Seeya soon! Say good bye Pika.
CPika;025;: Piiiiiiiiiiiiikaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!
*waves*
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lone_wolf816
19th September 2005, 4:49 PM
Holy c***.... That was the best chapter ever. Your writing was so good that I coudn't speak! The fight scene with Chase was welll wrote and I like how you made a legendary. You should sprite it. Once again this was the best chapter ever!! This story needs to be more appreciated. Yay for tthe spoiler!

;197;- Lone Wolf

Nylf
19th September 2005, 8:18 PM
;330; He's already made a sprite of Reynile. I named Rukaro, in my fic he's Anubial(Anubis, Fuluvial). Should have seen the ultimate Legenary dog with the ultimate warrior dog(He makes the 'nators look like pup's, and they're 6ft tall with claws like swords). This rocks, my jaw almost dislocated. That can only mean one thing....

;359;Cloud and Niyimee(well, the girl shadow, hope her name's right), sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! I'm gonna call that, Silhouetteshipping. I rule. Give it up for CINA!!!!

;373; *Sighs* Stupid Cina. Anyway, if you'd noticed, you would have guessed that I'm now giving awards, and you've earned the top award, FLYGON! That mean's your fic is as good or better than New Land, New Heroes, Emerald Lands, The 31 day promise, Final Link, Final Choice and Pokemon Revalation:Cross of Fates(OK, it's worse than this, but c'mon, you've read it, it RULES!!!), and well as defintly being better than PokemonX: Johto, Rejected and Colliding WorldsI:Genesis of heroes. Length, Great, Description, Great, Plot, Jaw Dropping, Description, too seperate from action, but that's my taste, so great!

;307; I woke up! That mean this is a great fic!

(You get the Jack award as well, but he's been gagged, tazered and locked in a cage with Rayquaza for safety reasons)

[Cano]
20th September 2005, 6:26 AM
Holy c***.... That was the best chapter ever. Your writing was so good that I coudn't speak! The fight scene with Chase was welll wrote and I like how you made a legendary. You should sprite it. Once again this was the best chapter ever!! This story needs to be more appreciated.

- Lone Wolf
O.O Wow...thank you soo much. That really made my day. Seriously! I thought I would get, "It could be better" this or, "It's too long" that. Honestly though, from the bottom of my heart, I truly and whole heartedly thank you. You are the best ever. Also, Reynile may be on page two if you would like to see it. ^_~ thanks to Chibi Pika for the pokemon and the sprite! And I really worked hard to make the fight scene to be good. If you watch Cowboy Bebop, you'll get an idea of how Chase fights (similar to Spike's style) and that's what I was going for when I was describing it.


He's already made a sprite of Reynile. I named Rukaro, in my fic he's Anubial(Anubis, Fuluvial). Should have seen the ultimate Legenary dog with the ultimate warrior dog(He makes the 'nators look like pup's, and they're 6ft tall with claws like swords). This rocks, my jaw almost dislocated. That can only mean one thing....

Cloud and Niyimee(well, the girl shadow, hope her name's right), sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! I'm gonna call that, Silhouetteshipping. I rule. Give it up for CINA!!!!

*Sighs* Stupid Cina. Anyway, if you'd noticed, you would have guessed that I'm now giving awards, and you've earned the top award, FLYGON! That mean's your fic is as good or better than New Land, New Heroes, Emerald Lands, The 31 day promise, Final Link, Final Choice and Pokemon Revalation:Cross of Fates(OK, it's worse than this, but c'mon, you've read it, it RULES!!!), and well as defintly being better than PokemonX: Johto, Rejected and Colliding WorldsI:Genesis of heroes. Length, Great, Description, Great, Plot, Jaw Dropping, Description, too seperate from action, but that's my taste, so great!

I woke up! That mean this is a great fic!

(You get the Jack award as well, but he's been gagged, tazered and locked in a cage with Rayquaza for safety reasons)
YAY! I gets an award!!?? Awesomeness!

And Silhouetteshipping?? O.o if I understand this 'shipping' correctly...eeeeeeeeewww @.O that's gross! Ha! Just kidding, that's pretty interesting that you've already came up with one :-p

And thanks for the awards man! Of course it's not better than xXSaberXx's fic, but maybe it's good enough to be comsidered on par??...no? Aww well, can't be helped, I mean people will be better than me, and I cant help that. But thanks anyways! ^_^

(Go Rayquaza!! ^~)

Thanks for the two new reviews!!
CPika;025;:Pi, pikachu. PIKA!
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Felix Feral Fezirix
20th September 2005, 8:54 AM
How did you bypass the censor? I hate you! *is silenced with a sniper rifle *

;025; Now before he used that...I used it. That was great. Pwnage. But no one is more 1337 than me! I am Pikachuistic! I am the very definition of great Pikachu. I am- * Is shot by his creator*

He stole my lines again(except for the last few)! Okay I don't have much more to say. Bye for now!

;025; What do you mean you shot me? I'm gonna hack the post and-*post button is hit*

[Cano]
21st September 2005, 12:21 AM
How did you bypass the censor? I hate you! *is silenced with a sniper rifle *

;025; Now before he used that...I used it. That was great. Pwnage. But no one is more 1337 than me! I am Pikachuistic! I am the very definition of great Pikachu. I am- * Is shot by his creator*

He stole my lines again(except for the last few)! Okay I don't have much more to say. Bye for now!

;025; What do you mean you shot me? I'm gonna hack the post and-*post button is hit*
Hehe, my lil secret ^_~

Thank you Pikachu! ^^ you rock! And yes, you are sooo 1337 man, like +0+4|_ |-|4|2|)(0|23 yknow? Hehe, thanks again for your review(s)!!
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Felix Feral Fezirix
21st September 2005, 8:41 AM
;025; Yes, I am 70741 1-14121)(0123! And you 120)(7_0127_ !!!


;004; Hey, don't forget me!

;025; ...shut up and apply your makeup in front of the mirror, will ya?

Nylf
21st September 2005, 7:59 PM
Translations please? I'm not 1337, I'm just weird.

Felix Feral Fezirix
23rd September 2005, 4:07 AM
;025; Me=Total Hardcore. SigCMegen=(To be disclosed when he figures it out)

[Cano]
23rd September 2005, 4:54 AM
Well...that's awesome and all, but it's considered SPAM, and I really don't want this topic closed because of SPAM, so try to keep it to a minimum, k? Thanks a lot guys, I appreciate it.

On topic: I decided to give y'all a lil spoiler, but I want your input. Do you want it or not?? Let's run a poll; it'll run until tomorrow at 9 PM Eastern Standard (I live in Buffalo.) so vote whilst you can! Post a 'Yay' or 'Nay' in your last post (unless you have something non-SPAMmy and new to say) alrighty?
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Validus
6th October 2005, 6:36 AM
I've only read the first chapter so far, i just got here gimme a break. anyway, this a good story so far. and is a Great story line for a game. Pokemon is a great game. but it's always so darn Happy! this has a very dark tone. just what the game needs. Keep up the good work!

UmbreonMaster
6th October 2005, 7:56 AM
Whoa those were so sad..*wipes tear* Well at leats he has a chance awesome! You peaked my interest with that summary so I decided to read! Great Job!

[Cano]
6th October 2005, 12:30 PM
Emerald Xavier
Wow, thank you! ^_^ I know what you mean. These games (IMO) need a darker tone. Life isn't always about catching butterflies and eating cake 24/7 (>.<) anyways, point is life sometimes sucks, and the games need to show that. Thanks for reading ^_^.

UmbreonMaster
YAY! So that summary might work after all ^_^ and I'm glad you decided to read! Yes it's sad, but hey, he's coming back. Believe it! [/Naruto quote]

Thanks you two, now I'll start writing chapter 5!! WHEE!! Believe it! (so I wasn't done, big deal)
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UmbreonMaster
7th October 2005, 1:11 AM
Yes your very good at this! It's very well planned!

Bu†cH
11th October 2005, 1:23 AM
Ho........ly........crap.

Totally original, long, highly detailed, shocking, fresh.

10.0 out of 10.0.

[Cano]
11th October 2005, 4:52 AM
Here's some "Family Photos:"

Chase with baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/cloudmugen.png)
Cano, Scyko and baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/babycloudwcanoscyko.png)
baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/babycloud.png)

Soon to come:
'Photos' with Cloud and his mother. Maybe some Shadows as well...;)

UmbreonMaster
12th October 2005, 5:05 PM
Here's some "Family Photos:"

Chase with baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/cloudmugen.png)
Cano, Scyko and baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/babycloudwcanoscyko.png)
baby Cloud (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/babycloud.png)

Soon to come:
'Photos' with Cloud and his mother. Maybe some Shadows as well...;)

Like I said before: Adorable! Well not exactly what I said before but....ya know...

[Cano]
15th October 2005, 10:22 PM
[Rt-G]
This chapter contains nothing that will offend the general audience.


Sunshine No More

Darkness, emptiness and loneliness…so this was purgatory. Or was it? Cloud wasn’t sure…he had often wondered about this in life. He laid away nights, thinking of the many different answers. He never liked what he came up with…it scared him.

What does happen to you once your body is drained of life? Where do you go? Is there really a Heaven, and in that same respect, truly a Hell? Well this…place…seemed to be the answer. Beyond life is nothingness; an empty void, absent of all life and happiness. And even of light, for that matter…so much for finding reprieve in death.

As his ‘consciousness’ floated thorough the void, Cloud suddenly felt a wave of fear and realization come crashing down on him.

So…this is what I’ll be doing…for the all of eternity, he whispered to himself.

Somehow, the prospect didn’t seem too appealing. But regardless of how much fun it appeared (or not) to be, he was stuck there, like it or not. He chose the latter. Hours may have passed…hell, maybe even days, how in the hell would he know?! He began to feel his sanity slowly slip from him. Then, he screamed as loud as he could, “WHY?! WHY AM I HERE? WHY IS THERE NO HEAVEN? DAMN IT, I’D EVEN WISH FOR A HELL AT THIS POINT!”

But it was useless; he was only yelling at himself. He crawled back inside of himself, sorrow sweeping over him.

“…where is my mother?” he asked, his voice shaking.

Cloud began to cry silently to himself. Suddenly he stopped.

What am I doing?! he shouted at himself in disgust.

He was ready to stifle the flow of tears almost instantly. But then he thought of something.

I’m dead…so there’s no point in holding back my tears anymore…

And so he continued, unashamed and unafraid…there is no shame in death…
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“Great, now I’m crazy. Here I am, in this huge waste of space, and I’m talking to myself...why am I still talking? There’s no one here to hear me! I’m talking to myself! Ahhhhh! I am crazy!!”

Cloud was becoming hysterical. Out of tears, and apparently out of his mind, he started to speak to himself.

“Pff, whatever. Even if I’m crazy, there’s no one here to tell me that I’m right! He-he-he.”

“Yeah, that’s the spirit! Just remember, you’re only crazy when you answer yourself,” a reassuring voice told him, the sound of it somewhat calming to him.

“Huh? Oh yeah, that’s right! Well at least I don’t do that,” he affirmed.

“Amen brother, amen!” it voiced its encouragement.

“Yeah…say, where are you? I mean, it’s not like it matters, I was just curious.”

“Well…I’m in your subconscious! I’m you!”

“Yeah? Man, it’s such a relief to be able to talk to someone else. I kinda thought there would be some freaky weird voice at one point. And now you’re finally…here…AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”


Much, much later…

“I’m not crazy, I’m not crazy, I’m not crazy,” Cloud repeated, over and over again, his voice a broken record.

“Who are you trying to convince? Cuz, no offense, but you’re freaking me out!” said his subconscious.

“I’M NOT CRAZY, I’M NOT CRAZY, I’M NOT CRAZY, I’M NOT CRAZY!”

“Ok, if you don’t cut that out, I’ll strangle you,” he threatened himself.

“Eep!” Cloud shrieked in fear.

Would he really strangle himself? Cloud had rather not risk it, though truthfully, he was already dead, and wasn’t getting any deader. But he was too terrified to realize this.

“Finally! Man, I thought you’d never shut up,” he sighed with relief.

I’m not crazy, I’m not crazy, Cloud thought to himself.

“Hey! Who’re you!!”

Huh?

“Yeah, you! Listen buddy, this is my mind, got it! Now buzz off!”

AHHH!!!

“STOP IT!!!”

…silence. Was it gone? Cloud dared not speak, for fear of it starting up again. Unfortunately, it wasn’t over just yet.

|…Cloud. Cloud, can you hear me?| came a fourth voice.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Go away! Leave me alone!” Cloud yelped in terror, his mind wrapped in disbelief.

|Cloud, please listen to me. I’m-|

“Shut up! I don’t want to hear you speak! You’re my subconscious! And you’re here to tell me that I’m crazy! But you know what?! I’m NOT crazy!!” he screamed.

|…What?! You must be mistaken young one. I am Reynile. I am over your lifeless body right now, and I am performing a sacred ritual that is meant to resurrect you.| said the mysterious voice.

“Yeah right, I don’t believe you!” Cloud shouted at the nothingness, “How can I trust you!!”

|I don’t suppose I have any proof to display to you my true intentions. So truthfully, you won’t know until the take the risk. It is however, your decision,| said ‘Reynile’.

Cloud remained silent. He thought about what this new voice was saying. True, it had no way to prove its identity, but Cloud felt it could trust it. Something about it seemed trustworthy, strong even. He supposed it was his voice that gave off that feeling. It was a voice that was confident, smooth, and full of life. But also, it was filled with virtue, compassion and honesty; like it had no reason to lie to anyone about anything, least of all, a dead nine year old.

Cloud opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it. He had to think about this some more. His age was causing him to rush into things, blindly without thinking lately. His mind flashed back to the incident in the forest, when he tried to reach a branch that was at least twenty feet from the ground. He then remembered his hastiness with the Shadows in the forest; how he screamed bloody murder at them, forgetting who they were, and tackling their leader to the ground.

It was his fault he was dead…his alone. He had made some bad choices, some for all the right reasons, but all bad nonetheless. If he had just stopped to think, stopped to ponder his situation a little more and search for a better way, maybe he wouldn’t have been in this situation in the first place. Reynile spoke again, a sense of urgency in his voice.

|Cloud, please make haste with this decision. We haven’t much time.|

Cloud could sense the fear in its voice now. Fear accompanied by worry.

“What’s the matter? Why do I have to make a decision now?”

|Because this ritual I am to perform is forbidden.|

It was then that it hit Cloud; he was talking to a pokémon! He had to be, there was no other way this could possibly make any sense otherwise. Humans don’t possess the ability to resurrect anything but fossilized pokémon. Nor do they possess any magical abilities. Pokémon however, are technically magical creatures in their own right. Sure as he was, he still decided to ask Reynile to confirm his guesses.

“Are…are you a pokémon?”

|Hmm…Cano and Scyko were right…you are indeed a brilliant child. Yes Cloud, I am a pokémon,| it answered impressed at his brilliance.

Cloud’s hopes rose. He inquired excitedly, “You met Cano and Scyko?!”

|Yes I have. They are right…where they should be.| it replaced quickly.

Cloud was suspicious at this comment, but thought nothing of it. He thought about asking Reynile another question, but was afraid as to how it should be worded. He decided to place his fears aside and ask away. If anything he could blame it on his age.

“What kind of pokémon can speak to the dead? Better yet, what kind can bring them back?”

There was a pause. Maybe he had offended it…or maybe he finally caught it in a lie. Cloud hoped the latter wouldn’t be true.

|I am,| it began, |a…‘Legendary’ pokémon. I have been alive for many, many years. I have seen the evolutions of many pokémon, as well as their deaths. I have seen the rise of man, and the fall of freedom. I have seen the cruelty among brothers, as well as among species. I have seen the beginning, and I am most certain that I will see the end. To be put simply, I am time, the proof of its length backwards and forwards, as well as its imperfections. Does that answer your question?|

Cloud couldn’t believe his ears. He was talking to a living legend. Though he had never heard of the Legendary pokémon Reynile, he still believed it to be truth.

Convinced it was a legendary capable of bringing him back to life, he finally made his decision.

“I finished making my decision. And my answer is yes,” he answered confidently.

|Excellent. Now the ritual can begin. However, there is something you should know…about the side effects…|

“I really don’t care about those, whatever they are. I just want to live again. If I spend one minute more in this place, I’ll go insane!” Cloud quickly interrupted; he was quick to get this over with, something that bothered him for only a mere second.

|Very well then. Now, to perform this ritual, I’ll require your assistance,| Reynile finished.

“How can I help you?”

|Simple; you must believe. And you must want. That is all I need from you. And no matter what happens, don’t give up hoping or wanting to come back. And don’t give in to anything that you may hear, no matter what it is.|

“What might I hear?” he asked, curious for the answer yet afraid to hear it.

|Heaven,| Reynile said. And he then began the ritual.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a long and painful process, drawing everything from Cloud; pain, happiness, sadness. It even tried to take his memories away from him, but he held on to them. They were the few precious things that meant everything to him, and he would never let them go.

There were times when he faltered, ever so slightly, and felt the pain increase immensely, felt his soul change as well as his mind set. He quickly regained his thoughts of hope and desire to live, just as Reynile told him to.

Reynile was right again; Heaven was constantly bombarding him, constantly attacking. It was the hardest experience he ever endured, to ignore Heaven…to ignore his mother. Cloud cried the whole time, his insides being twisted and contorted through emotional pain unbearable by any man, let alone this nine year old boy. After already being subjected to so much pain and fear due to Silhouette, Cloud didn’t think he could suffer through worse; but he was wrong.

He thought constantly to himself, When will this be over, when will this be over.

Again Cloud lost hope, and again he felt himself change in body and soul. But this time he couldn’t bring back his hope and want. This time, he fell deeper into the void changing ever more into something that wasn’t him. His arms and legs changed into paws, his knees cracking backward so that his legs matched that of a dog’s, his tailbone extending and breaking the skin, forming a bony tail that slowly grew muscles and tissue around it. He felt his skull crush itself into another shape, heard the sickening crunch that accompanied it. His mouth and nose extended into a snout, his nose flattened and wet like a dog’s.

So this was why Reynile warned him…it must’ve also been one of the warnings he tried to give him. Again, Cloud found himself in a precarious situation that he alone got into by rushing into things. He began to cry, not only in pain, but in fear as well. He had no idea what he was turning into and that scared him the most.

Hair began to grow all over his body, hair colored with beige from his snout, under his chin and continuing along his underbelly to the tip of his tail. The rest was a light blue. His ears turned into wispy tufts of hair, his eyes into a blood red.

What’s happening? ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

A blinding light hit him right between the eyes. Then he was in a field, lit only by the pale glow of the moon. He was on all fours, his head hung low so that he stared at his front paws. He raised his head to take in his surroundings, but felt his ears twitch suddenly; he was not alone. He let a low growl and turned to his right, staring at what seemed to be a meaningless patch of grass.

From this patch of grass emerged a tiny bear pokémon, its fur a light shade of purple, its teeth replaced with rigid icicles. One of its eyes was an icy blue, while the other was a dull brown. His claws were also icicles, his paws colored with a sky blue.

It stared up at Cloud with a sense of seriousness in its eyes. Then its left eye began to glow. It spoke to him, “He will lose himself and fall to the darkness. And it will be because of you.”

Cloud wanted to ask the pokémon what it was talking about, but what came out was, |Yes, I know. But maybe you are wrong. After all, not even Psychics can see the future.|

“I am not wrong. The boy will become what he hates most and destroy everything this world created. It cannot be avoided.”

|The future is not set in stone.| Cloud’s voice growled in anger.

“This is fate. And fate cannot be avoided,” it shot back.

|I will prove you wrong! I will steer him clear of the darkness! I will keep him showered in light!|

“YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE TOO MUCH!” it roared out of frustration. It regained control of its emotions and spoke again, “They have decided to detain you. They will hunt you down till you plow yourself into your own grave. You cannot escape them, nor can you defeat them.”

|Well maybe it is high time someone tried.|

What’s happening? Where am I? Why am I a pokémon? Is it too late…to hope…?

Then suddenly, like a fish on a line, Cloud was jerked backward, his new skin and hair ripped from his body like a costume, his knees violently and quickly ‘broken’ into the opposite direction. He was human again.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I’LL NEVER GIVE IN! I WAS GIVEN A CHANCE TO LIVE AGAIN, AND I WON’T GIVE IT UP!”
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He took a breath, and his hearing returned. He took another, and he felt the soft dirt beneath his calves, his hands wrapped around a turtle shell. Another, and he smelled the tree, dying above him. Another, and he tasted the dried blood still in his mouth, a hint of vomit still present. One last breath and he could see the insides of his eyelids, the darkness seemingly surrounding him.

Welcome back, said Reynile’s voice.

Glad to be back, Cloud voiced breathing happily.

Don’t smile just yet young one…from this point on, for you, the sun shines no more.

************************************************** ******************

Author's Notes:

Well, Chapter Five isn't as long as Chapter Four, but I think it's just as good. In this Chapter I tried more to reveal that Cloud was truly 9 years old, like Psychic suggested. I still don't think I did it as well as she would have liked, but I made an effort and that's what matters. Truly though, I believe I did a fantastic job and have lived up to my name.
For those unsure of the timeline of these events, this is Cloud's point of view on the story while Reynile is basically toturing Cano and Scyko. When the life force turned completely white, meaning Reynile's was winning, that's when Cloud lost hope and almost became the second Reynile. But in the end, he proved he had the strength and will to live again.
I also wanted to add that I hoped I provided enough info so that you readers can picture the pokémon I described towards the end. It's a polar bear pokémon, so typically one would think it to be ice. Wrong. It's predominant type is Psychic, hence the light purple fur. It's part Ice, but like I said before it's predominantly Psychic. This pokémon will appear again, so remember him. And for the record, no he's not legendary.
This is basically like version 3.0 of Chapter 5. After reading it over in the middle of making it, I changed several things around, making Cloud's conversations with himself longer, increasing the passage of time in the void, overall making it move seemlessly line to line. I did this about 3 times, and am happy with the results.

Now for this Chapter's Disclaimer:
I own the new polar bear pokémon which is as of 10/15/05, Cereicear. He is Psychic and Ice, and I'll sprite him later. EDIT: Cereicear (http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b228/SigCMugen/customcereicear.png)
Reynile again, belongs to Chibi Pika, author of The Legendarian Chronicles.
I do not own Pokémon, nor do I claim to.
Chapter title provided by ZeroGKikaider. Thanks ^_^.

One last thing before I move on:
Like the great Psychic, I too have decided to have any questions you have answered, not by me, but by the characters of the story. After all, who better to tell you what they're feeling and the current situation? So ask away.

Chapter END


Next Time: Long Time, No See

“He-he, well if it isn’t Red. Long time, no see loser.”

Seeya soon!
<SCM>

Valkyrie X
16th October 2005, 1:53 AM
...

*stares at chapter in amazement*

*is speechless*

...Wow. This was simply incredible.

Description was excellent, as usual. You elaborated wonderfully on everything, from the thoughts and feelings of the characters to the surroundings and Pokémon. Well done on this part.

Your grammar and spelling were perfect...Well, almost. You still had a few typos that need editing. Of course, this is nothing serious, since it happens to everyone. Just remember to proofread carefully before you post.

Remember in my first review when I said the plot was unoriginal? Well, I take that back. This is totally original, having Cloud die and Reynile ressurecting him. And speaking of Reynile, there are new Pokémon, too...Yeah, you can just forget what I said in my first review.

The first word that comes to mind when I think of this fic is mysterious. Honestly, it's incredibly unique and there are so many supernatural and rather dark aspects of it...It's absolutely exquisite. Just...wow.

I really am impressed by your writing, Sig. Keep up the good work...

;381;ZR;380;

[Cano]
16th October 2005, 3:06 AM
Alto Mare Warrioress

O_o

<<

>>

^_^ that was awesome...really a great pick me up, plus great first review!

Seriously, I was getting kind of upset, but I'm totally better now. Thank you soooo much AMW, you really brought my attitude about reviewers around. I definitely feel better and I'm glad you like it so much.

I do remember your first post. And I totally understand why you posted what you did. It was the beginning of the story, so to the readers, the plot seemed...'Ash and Co'-ish. But that was not what I wanted, and that's definitely not what the readers are gonna get. The world isn't always 'sunshine and rainbows' and that's when I came up with Silhouette. I prefer they be called Silhouette without the 'Team' in front of them, because I think when people hear Team, they remember Team Rocket...and they're a bunch of goofballs.

But that's besides the point. Anyway, about the new pokes, yes there will be tons mentioned. But Cloud will only have and see a special few. This isn't a journey to be the pokemon master. Believe it!

And I see you didn't mention the polar bear pokemon I came up with. I'm in the process of spriting it now.

And once again, thank you soo much AMW, it means everything to me that you read, whether you were to like it (yes!) or not. I hope you'll come back for to see this to the end.
<SCM>

Felix Feral Fezirix
16th October 2005, 8:04 AM
I have nothing to say.

;025; I am 1337ly speechless.

;004; I shall remain silent.

All: We are all speechless in amazement.

Seriously...the void is kinda cool, and I liked it when he was saying "I'm not nuts, I'm not nuts..." over and over again. lol.

Nothing else to say. Pika-

;025; Out. I am Pikachu. Ha.

UmbreonMaster
16th October 2005, 4:14 PM
WHOA!!! Again awesome! Anyways the sprite is very very good!! Anyways Awesome!!

~UM~;197;

Nylf
16th October 2005, 7:55 PM
;330; OK, that was amazing. Two points of view makes a nice touch, and Reynile unfortunatly has the typical legendary personality. I prefer to give legendaries real personalities, not the old high and mighty sort of one. My Ho-oh is the exact opposite of what most people think Ho-oh's like. He's fun loving, carefree and a romantic(Basically a male Cina).

;359; Yeah! Me and Ho-oh are best buds!

;250; **** straight Cina!

;373; Great, three of them. Anyway, kinda short for my liking, but the overall quality far made up for it. Quality over quantity, eh Sig? Anyway, I'll give this a Flygon award, but if this should falter in it's excellance, it's going down. Oh, and it's "Sacred" not "scared".

Bluestar Jet
16th October 2005, 8:38 PM
this is one of the best fics i have ever read. wow. i like the plot, but you should put more of cloud's mother, especially because he is nine.
;378; i like the part about the legendarys, mostly the new one

Valkyrie X
16th October 2005, 10:26 PM
Alto Mare Warrioress

O_o

<<

>>

^_^ that was awesome...really a great pick me up, plus great first review!

Seriously, I was getting kind of upset, but I'm totally better now. Thank you soooo much AMW, you really brought my attitude about reviewers around. I definitely feel better and I'm glad you like it so much.

I do remember your first post. And I totally understand why you posted what you did. It was the beginning of the story, so to the readers, the plot seemed...'Ash and Co'-ish. But that was not what I wanted, and that's definitely not what the readers are gonna get. The world isn't always 'sunshine and rainbows' and that's when I came up with Silhouette. I prefer they be called Silhouette without the 'Team' in front of them, because I think when people hear Team, they remember Team Rocket...and they're a bunch of goofballs.

But that's besides the point. Anyway, about the new pokes, yes there will be tons mentioned. But Cloud will only have and see a special few. This isn't a journey to be the pokemon master. Believe it!

And I see you didn't mention the polar bear pokemon I came up with. I'm in the process of spriting it now.

And once again, thank you soo much AMW, it means everything to me that you read, whether you were to like it (yes!) or not. I hope you'll come back for to see this to the end.
<SCM>
*nod* My pleasure. Yes, you can certainly expect more reviews from me.

Oh yeah, I forgot about that polar bear Pokémon. It's quite unusual; I'm assuming it can see into the future, or at least predict it?

;381;ZR;380;

[Cano]
16th October 2005, 11:00 PM
Shiny Flygon

Reynile doesn't have the typical Legendary attitude...he hates the other Legendaries, (except Rukario) and that title. He doesn't seem himself as 'Legendary'...just old. The only reason he called himself Legendary was to help Cloud understand why he was as powerful as he was. Though, seeing how he talks the way he does, you might think he's a 'typical Legendary'...though he in no way is. And what gave you the 'high and mighty' impression? The only way I think that you could have thought that is with that last conversation...but he in no way thinks he's better than anyone else. He and Rukario are the only ones who have this mentality, (in Chapter 4 I even had him insult Mew and the other Lengendaries). Believe it.

Felix the Mutant Pikachu

Ha, ha! Finally xP. Just kidding. I'm glad you like it so much. :)

UmbreonMaster

Thanks! That sprite was a lot of hard work. I like how it came out, but the main fur color still bothers me. See, Saturday just like I promised! :D

Bluestar Jet

Wow! Someone just randomly reading and reviewing! Sweet!! You get...I dunno! But I'll sprite you something!! Whee! And thank you for reviewing, and I'm glad you like it too! :DDDDD

Alto Mare Warrioress

More reviews? Sweet!!! This rocks! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D

And Cereicear (that's its name) is a Psychic type. So, it can see into the future. It's not Legendary or anything like that. It's a common Psychic/Ice type Pokemon.

Thank you all!!! Any questions for the characters?

Bu†cH
17th October 2005, 6:32 AM
Woah!

Still jaw-dropping, suspenseful, attracting, and good.

Keep it the h**l up!

[Cano]
25th October 2005, 5:22 AM
Bluestar Jet
I forgot something. What exactly do you mean when you say this,
but you should put more of cloud's mother, especially because he is nine.? I mean, I'm confused as to what you're trying to say, so I'll answer the best I can. Cloud's mother is gone. She was taken from him by Silhouette so she obviously cannot appear anytime soon. I could delve into the past a little more I guess, but that wasn't my original intention (at least not just yet) so I'll continue with the way I planned for now.

Does that answer you statement? I was kinda confused.

Well, now that that is settled, any questions for the characters? Like Cloud, Chase, Reynile or even Cano and Scyko? Come on, don't be shy! They'll only answer while they're in the 'hiatus' between 5 and 6. I won't do this again till after Chapter 10, so speak now or forever hold your peace. Well, seeya soon!
<SCM>

.:EDIT!:. SPOILER ALERT!!

Cloud procured a stone from the ground on which he once laid and whipped it at the bush. It struck something hard and yelped, “OW!” Dashing like mad toward the bush, Cloud picked up a nearby fallen branch and began attacking the bush mercilessly.

“Take that! And some of this! And one of these! DIE EVIL BUSH MAN, DIE!!!”

“OW! Hey –ouch- stop it! Seriously –ow!- stop it!! Hey are you –sonnova, owie!!- listening to me?! Stop it Cloud!” the ‘evil bush man’ cried in agony.

Cloud ceased his attacks on the bush. This voice was familiar.

“Dad?”

Cloud parted the branches of the bush to find a battered, bruised and beaten man of about twenty seven years. His left eye was covered by a gigantic bump that seemed to originate from his eyebrow. His lip was bleeding and his leg twitched every so often.

“Ohmygod, DAD!”

~Fire&Ice~
31st October 2005, 2:28 AM
This is a really great fanfic.
Im glad you requested me...

Well you have a couple convention/spelling/grammatical errors but theyre totally understandable. I like the plot and the tone of this story. A little different from other fanfics. But yeah, you need to make him a little more like a 9 year old. Other than that, great job!

UmbreonMaster
28th November 2005, 8:11 PM
It's been almost a month since any update... Plz PM me when there's one! Nice Spoiler BTW.

;197;~UM~;197;

[Cano]
26th February 2006, 9:32 AM
[Rt-13+]
The following chapter contains mild language.



Long Time, No See

Welcome back, said Reynile’s voice.

Glad to be back, Cloud voiced breathing happily.

Don’t smile just yet young one…from this point on, for you the sun shines no more.


Cloud opened his eyes. Standing directly above him was a dog-like pokémon. It had light blue fur; ears that flowed silently and softly through the air; soul piercing red eyes; and a beige underbelly. Its tail was long and very snake-like, in thickness and mobility. This was Reynile, the pokémon that brought Cloud back. After taking in all of its features, Cloud deciphered that, while Reynile was quite large, he wasn’t as big as Arcanine.

So you’re the one who brought me back. Then that means…I was turning into…

Cloud began to sit up slowly; slowly because he remembered the pain he was in before he passed on. But to his surprise, there was no pain as he raised himself into a sitting position. He couldn’t believe the pain was gone! He felt completely rejuvenated, and because of this, decided to do something he always wanted.

Realizing he was still clutching the baby turtle, Cloud placed it on the ground next to him. He then positioned his hands next to his ears, palms on the ground, fingers pointing toward his body. Then using every once of strength he had, swung his feet up into the air bringing his knees close to his chest. As soon as his legs were a good half a foot from his chest, he quickly pushed off with his hands while simultaneously swinging his feet away from his chest. Soon he was in the air, his upper body taking its rightful place above his lower half.

His hat sailed off his head as he landed on his feet, his upper body hunched over, his knees bent. His head was about knee high, his crazy white hair covering his eyes in a small shadow. He smiled and slowly regained his posture.

Once he stood firmly on his feet again, he jumped for joy smiling and laughing. Finally finished with his celebration, he turned to the pokémon that granted him this second chance at life and smiled. Cloud couldn’t find the right words to express his gratitude. Here he was alive again thanks to this hound pokémon, and he was speechless. So he let his smile do the talking. Cloud wasn’t too sure at the time, but he thought he saw Reynile smile back at him.

Alive again, there was nothing that could bring Cloud down. He looked around his would-be resting place; surprisingly, it looked to be a fitting grave…for an Ursaring! The burrow was huuuge! It had to be to fit two large hounds, one six-foot-tall humanoid, and a nine-year-old child. There the four of them were, happy as can be…until a twig was heard snap behind the bunch, and Reynile’s snout curled in a low growl. A shiver ran down Cloud’s spine. Could that Niyimee character be back to finish the job? Cloud whirled his body around, searching desperately for whatever had made the noise. He began to strain his eyes in the darkness, staring intently at the burrow’s opening.

Just a Sentret, he thought to himself as he tried to slow his beating heart, it’s just a little, harmless Sentret.

It wasn’t working. Cloud was scared, and he was sure it showed. Angered by his sudden inability to control his emotions, he screamed out into the darkness, “WHO’S THERE? STOP PLAYING AROUND!”

Silence.

|No one can know I was here! I must hide. Can you handle yourself?| Reynile stated.

Sure, after all I have Scyko and Cano with me.

And with that the pokémon leapt into the trees, concealing himself. Just as all trace of Reynile disappeared, a rustling came from the bushes.

There!

Cloud procured a stone from the ground on which he once laid and whipped it at the bush. It struck an object that yelped, “OW!” Dashing like a madman toward the bush, Cloud picked up a nearby fallen branch and began attacking the intruder mercilessly.

“Take that! And some of this! And one of these! DIE EVIL BUSH MAN, DIE!”

“OW! Hey –ouch- stop it! Seriously –ow!- stop it!! Hey are you –sonnova, owie!!- listening to me?! Stop it Cloud!” the ‘evil bush man’ cried in agony.
Cloud ceased his attacks on the bush. This voice was familiar.

“Dad?”

Cloud parted the branches of the bush to find a battered, bruised and beaten man of about twenty seven years. His left eye was covered by a gigantic bump that seemed to originate from his eyebrow. His lip was bleeding and his leg twitched every so often.

“Ohmygod, DAD!”

The heap that was Cloud’s father suddenly leapt into the air. His face, though bruised, battered, beaten, and bloody beyond all recognition was just as threatening as ever, blue veins clearly visible in his temple.

“WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH YOU?! DO I LOOK LIKE AN EVIL BUSH MAN TO YOU?” Chase screamed, pointing his right index in Cloud’s face; his jaw four times larger than normal, brandishing his sharp and long Feraligatr-like teeth. His pupils vanished from his eyes, and adorned on his forehead was a tic-tac-toe like intersection of throbbing veins. A huge bead of sweat appeared on the back of Cloud’s head as he apologized, frantically waving his hands in front of him.

The following scene consisted of Chase stealing the branch from his son’s grip, then chasing him with it, threatening to ‘beat the evil bush man blood outta him.’ ^_^;;;
__________________________________________________ ______________________________

“I can’t believe you’re alive! WAHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Dad, lemme go! Dad, you’re embarrassing me! Geez, get a hold of yourself willya? Stop crying, you’re getting my shirt all teary!” Cloud complained, all the while crying on the inside as well.

It was a happy sight. Quite the tear jerker really; a man and his son, sitting beneath the shade of a tree. The son’s head on his father’s shoulder, the father staring confidently into the sky. Kodak moment anyone?

The confusion and beating was all sorted out and now and Chase was just happy to see his son was alive. Then came the questioning: ‘Does anything hurt?’, ‘What the **** were you thinking?!’, ‘How’d you get mixed up with a buncha Shadows anyway!?’, ‘Where the hell were you two?!’ (directed toward Scyko and Cano) and of course, ‘What’s death like?’

To answer his father, Cloud decided to regal his amazing story; how he encountered the Shadows, took down their leader, and then skillfully hid from the assassin sent to finish him off. The tale he wove depicted him as the young valiant hero, the one who could conquer the darkness and bring light to the land…which was how Chase knew he was exaggerating. Chase however, did not see it fit to diminish Cloud’s feeling of importance and heroism, so he decided to play along. He appropriately added his ‘Oohs’ and ‘Ahhs’ in exactly the right places, watching intently as his son’s already beaming face began to shine brilliantly, lighting the entire forest as far as the eye could see.

When his tale was finally completed, Chase gave his son a standing ovation…followed by a swift punch in the head. Rubbing his noggin Cloud questioned, “What was that for?”

To which his father replied, “For being an idiot! I swear to God, you just got yourself killed! I flippin' knew you weren’t ready for this, but against my better judgment I let you go anyway. Well, I’ll tell ya what; that ain’t gonna happen twice! You’re comin' home, now!”

“What? Why? No, I was doing just fine on my own! Scyko and Cano will back me up, won’t you guys?” Cloud whined, turning to his best friends. Scyko and Cano could be seen shaking their heads vigorously in the background.

“Thanks a lot you two…” Cloud said with his head hung low, a sweat drop falling down his head. Scyko and Cano flashed Chase a thumbs up in the background.

“And who asked you two! You’re both lucky I don’t kick both your asses on the spot!”

Next they could be seen cowering in fear in chibi form. Ignoring his father’s pokémon Cloud decided to make a stand, “I’m not going back. I don’t want to go back!”

“Give-me-one-good-reason-to-let-you-go,” Chase growled through gritted teeth.

“I think this little guy’s got a good one,” came a third voice.

Cloud and his father turned to locate the voice’s origin. In the middle of a clearing stood a man, about Chase’s height, wearing a red cap (“Oh snap, where’s my hat?!”) and a matching red jacket, his blue jeans faded and torn at the knees. Adorned on his shoulder was a tiny yellow mouse, its ears creating a ninety-degree angle on its head. In his hands he held the now awake red Squirtle.

“He-he, well if it isn’t Red. Long time, no see loser.”

The tiny mouse on Red’s shoulder seemed to take offense to this. It said, red cheeks sparking lightly, “Pi-ka! Pipipika-chuu!”

“Up yours Chase,” chuckled ‘Red.’

“What’d you say to me?!” growled Chase.

“Pi-ka-“ it began in disbelief, rolling its eyes.

“Not you ya overgrown rat!” spat Chase.

Pikachu gasped and folded its arms in disgust. Red then answered, “You heard me…”

“Y’know, you’ve only been here fifteen seconds…and you’re already startin' to piss me off!”

“He-he, nice to see you too Chase.”

Chase just stared at the man, a clear hatred in his eyes. Then he did something Cloud never expected: he laughed. He laughed a good hearty laugh, one that Cloud had not heard since his mother was around. Unable to understand this newcomer’s significance, Cloud asked his father who he was.

“Oh this guy? He’s a nobody who coulda been somebody, if a certain someone hadn’t beaten him to that special something.”

“Hey, bite me!” snapped Red, his partner agreeing with him.

“Dad, you’re talking in riddles! My brain hurts now!” Cloud said confused. Red tried to clear up the confusion: “What this old fart’s trying to-“

“OLD FART?! I’M BARELY OLDER’N YOU, JACKASS!”

“PIKA!” came the mouse’s battle cry as it shocked Chase its signature Thundershock attack. Chase’s charred remains lay helplessly on the floor.

“-say is that, I was the runner up in the League Finals, back when he was the Champ,” finished Red.

Ignoring the smoldering clump that was his father, Cloud asked in disbelief, “League…Champ? Dad, how come you never told me?”

Chase’s remains sprang to life, shaking off the black dust that covered him. Pikachu seemed hurt to see its prey still breathing as it kicked the air and snapped its fingers.

“Ah…well, I guess I never got around to it,” Chase said, rubbing the back of his head as he chuckled nervously. “So, uh, moving on, what did you say earlier Red?”

“Huh? Oh, right. I said I think this little guy’s got one good reason to keep your son from going home,” Red stated while pointing at the tiny turtle in his hands.

Cloud stared at the turtle, trying to remember how he knew it. Then it came to him.

“That’s the pokémon I saved!”

“That’s right. And I think it has something it wants to say to you.” Red then lowered the tiny pokémon to the floor allowing it to hobble over to Cloud’s feet. It walked shakily over to him, tripping twice.

Does this thing not know how to walk? thought Cloud to himself.

Hey, from what I heard, you’re no expert yourself!

Cloud’s eyes bugged out. Oh no…the voice is back!

The voice has an owner! No, not the tree you Geodude! Down. Not that rock! More to your right. What’s with you and inanimate objects! I’ll give you a hint.

“SQUIRTLE!”

Cloud turned his attention to the tiny turtle pokémon now at his feet. He breathed a sigh of relief.

“Just the Squirtle…just…the…” He said staring down at the pokémon. It looked back up at him and waved. He trembled slightly and felt his eye twitch. He then raised his hand as if he was still in school.

“Uh…what’s the matter?” asked his father.

“The pokémon’s talking to me,” he said in a dull voice.

“Well…yeah. We all know that. Now what you should be afraid of, is if you can understand it,” Chase said reassuringly. Once again, Cloud raised his hand.

“Yeah?”

“I can understand it…”

“...really? Hmm…well Red, what do you make of it?”

“In my professional opinion? I think your kid’s a mental case, just like his old man.”

“Yeah that’s what I was thinking too.”

“…”

“What?” asked Chase.

“No smart remark? No snappy comeback? Not even an angry ‘Hey!’?” answered Red.

“No, I’m pretty much a psycho.”

(Budum-bum tisssh! Ok, not very funny…I hate you guys!)

************************************************** ********
Kinda short, I know, but that's all I wanted this chapter for. It leads into something better, so don't worry too much. The next chapter contains information about how I view the Pokemon world. Phenomena such as evolution, aging, reproduction, etc. will be revealed in the upcoming chapter, as well as a new protagonist. That's all for today. Bye! Also, I'd like to apologize for the severe hiatus. I hope you all will understand.

Chapter END


Next time:The World in Which We Live

Sometimes…I’m glad I cannot cry. But others, I seem cursed to never shed a tear.

Valkyrie X
26th February 2006, 6:39 PM
This was a very nice chapter, SCM...Not as action-packed or long as some of your others, but still well-written and fluent.

Your grammar and spelling were both excellent, but I do want to point out a few things:


"...Well, I’ll tell ya what; that ain’t gonna happen twice! You’re comin home, now!”
There should be an apostrophy at the end.

It had to be to fit two large hounds, one 6 foot tall humanoid, and a 9 year old child.
I may be wrong, but I do believe that there should be hyphens between "6", "foot", and "tall". The same goes for "9", "year", and "old". Also, you should change "6" and "9" to their word forms. If you're using any number in fanfiction, don't type the actual number, write it out in word form. So it should look like this: "It had to be to fit two large hounds, one six-foot-tall humanoid, and a nine-year-old child."

"...DIE EVIL BUSH MAN, DIE!!!”
Personally, I think you should lay off a bit on typing more than one exclaimation mark. It isn't just for this quote, either; there were quite a few places where I spotted an overdose of exclaimation marks. When someone is shouting or saying something loudly, you really don't need more than one exclaimation mark, no matter how loud the statement is. If you really want to emphasize the audibility of the person's statement, you can simply capitalize and/or italicize their quote, and nothing more.

Scyko and Cano flashed Chase a thumbs up in the background.
Er...how can an Arcanine give a thumbs-up sign? o_O

Your description was pretty well done...Not exactly as detailed as your previous chapters, but it wasn't shabby at all. I think you could've described Red and his Pikachu a little more, but meh...You elaborated very well on other things, however, such as Chase's beaten face and the emotions of the characters. You did a pretty good job on this part.

Although this chapter was slightly short compared to your others, the length itself wasn't bad at all. It was still fairly long and satisfactory. Don't worry about this chapter's length too much, as it's still a decent-sized length.

I quite enjoyed the humor in this chapter, especially the part where the Squirtle was trying to get Cloud to look at him. The snappy comments that went back and forth between Chase and Red was amusing, also...Humor is always a good thing in fanfiction. Helps to lighten everything up and make the story more interesting.

Overall, you did quite well on this chapter, though you could still fix a few minor things, which I've already pointed out...You did a very good job, as usual, but there's always room for improvement. Keep it up; I'll wait patiently for the next chapter.

;381;ZR;380;

[Cano]
26th February 2006, 9:31 PM
Thanks again [Zennou Ryuu], your review was great as usual, and really brought my spirits about my latest chapter.

In regards to the grammatical errors:
...my bad ^^; but hopefully all fixed. Looks like I'm still learnin' ^^

About the Arcanine's thumbs up:
;D use your imagination! :D I thought it be pretty amusing to picture a dog giving the 'thumbs up' sign, so I went for it! And I guess it worked! Hooray for seemingly impossible stuff!!

And like I said, Chapter 6 can't compare to the previous chapters, my best of which I'd say are chapters 4 and 5 (if I remember correctly, the chapters dealing with the Shadows vs Chase, and Cloud's resurrection), but I'm glad you enjoyed it anyway. I was in a very comedic mood last night, hence the comedy in this latest installment, and I think it turned out pretty good. I'm glad that you liked it, and because of your review, I think I did a good job writing the comedic scenes. My favorite was when Red entered the picture; I wanted to capture that sense of rivalry found in some of my favorite anime/manga. Personally, I think I did well, though I believe I could do better.

Thanks again, and may this be the start of more great reviews!
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Bu†cH
26th February 2006, 9:44 PM
The son of the "evil bush man" screws around again. ^_^

A dramatic beginning, but hilarious the rest of the way. This chapter hooked me to read the whole thing.

It's about time you came. Welcome back.

[Cano]
26th February 2006, 9:52 PM
[Beautiful Butch] thanks for the review! Yes he strikes again! Spawn of the 'evil bush man' will pwn j00'!

And thanks, good to be back.
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Nylf
26th February 2006, 10:24 PM
Okay then, I've said it before, and I'll say it again, bit of a bump ay?

Yeah, well it's good to have you back, I liked this fic. Before you ask, it's Shiny Flygon, I got my name changed to Nylf.

Anywho, I should rate this, right? Well it was funny in places, particularly the Squirtle but. Yeah, it was very..fillerry. But it was a good filler.

Haven't got much to say, didn't see too many mistakes, so just keep it up.

[Cano]
26th February 2006, 10:38 PM
Yeah, I know what you mean. But at least it's a good filler, ey [Nylf]? And don't worry, I knew it was you. Man people seem to changing their names left and right. Maybe I should change mine...

Back on topic, your review seemed rushed. Not that it matters much, because it gets to the heart of the matter; the fact that this recent chapter was more filler than anything. I'm still relieved that you liked it (you did like it...right?) and even more so relieved that you reviewed. Thanks [Nylf] and I hope to see you around more often.
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UmbreonMaster
27th February 2006, 5:53 AM
Alright! Finally! It was really good! Some minor grammar mistakes but it's great though! PM me when the next ones done or just PM me anyways if ya want!^^;;

Seiryu
28th February 2006, 12:36 AM
Well, it's...not the worst thing I've read... >..>;;;

...

Just kidding, this's actually quite well done. It seemed to start like so many OT journeyfics, but then chapter...three came and everything practically did a 180-degree turn, at least as far as originality goes. I've only seen the "trainer gets killed somehow and then brought back to life" plot once before, and as a fellow writer I'm sure you know how hard it is to make something truly original. Good job!

Your characters seem pretty fleshed out, especially the pokémon. I particularly enjoyed the interactions between Scyko and Cano. Reynile seems really interesting too, though from the description, I feel I'd become more attracted to his appearance... *mumbles something about long, sexy tails*

...

Yeah, you didn't hear that last bit. *cough* >..>;;

ANYWAYS, as others have said, Cloud's often seemed more mature than even an emotionally-hardened nine-year-old, but I think you did a better job about revealing his...immaturity...during this past chapter.

Also, a nice rivalry between Chase and Red...I look forward to seeing how they continue to interact with each other. And is Chase supposed to remind me of Samurai Champloo's Mugen in some way (obviously other than appearance)? Or is it purely coincidence?

Well, this normally is where I'd talk about spelling and grammar issues that you might have, but it seems others have already pointed out most everything, so I'll just turn my attention elsewhere.

Back to Cloud, actually. This's something that bothered me a little since I started reading. He's nine years old, and yet...he's already four foot eight?! Wow. I don't know if I'd wanna see him after his growth spurt! xp Seriously though, most nine-year-olds I've seen are only maybe three and a half feet tall, maybe four at the very most. This just seemed...very strange to me.

Also, I know they were added for humorous purposes in this chapter and I'm probably the only one thinking this way, but I found I had a slight problem with the largely anime-style character reactions (enlarged head, chibi forms, etc), especially mixed within the overall dark atmosphere of the fic. To me, they just seemed...out of place, but again, that's just my worthless opinion. ;D

Overall, this is a promising work that carries a lot of potential. Now the question that remains is this: can you unlock that potential through your writing? Well, I think you can. XD Keep it up!

[Cano]
28th February 2006, 3:49 AM
Yay! Another review. Just one question [Seiryu]...do I know you? Are you one of my previous reviewers with a changed name? The way you write your reviews seems oddly familiar (that and the strange and random mention of strange fetishes...;>>) and I can't quite place my finger on who you might be...

Anyway, on to the main event:


Well, it's...not the worst thing I've read... >..>;;;

...

Just kidding, this's actually quite well done. It seemed to start like so many OT journeyfics, but then chapter...three came and everything practically did a 180-degree turn, at least as far as originality goes. I've only seen the "trainer gets killed somehow and then brought back to life" plot once before, and as a fellow writer I'm sure you know how hard it is to make something truly original. Good job!

Your characters seem pretty fleshed out, especially the pokémon. I particularly enjoyed the interactions between Scyko and Cano. Reynile seems really interesting too, though from the description, I feel I'd become more attracted to his appearance... *mumbles something about long, sexy tails*

...


I've heard that before...seriously [Zennou Ryuu] said (relatively) the same thing one page before. All I can say is...'Had ya going, didn't I?' I knew what I was doing when I started this fic...relatively.



Yeah, you didn't hear that last bit. *cough* >..>;;

ANYWAYS, as others have said, Cloud's often seemed more mature than even an emotionally-hardened nine-year-old, but I think you did a better job about revealing his...immaturity...during this past chapter.

Also, a nice rivalry between Chase and Red...I look forward to seeing how they continue to interact with each other. And is Chase supposed to remind me of Samurai Champloo's Mugen in some way (obviously other than appearance)? Or is it purely coincidence?


Hmm...seems everyone doesn't find Cloud's attitude, believable. I've been working on making him seem more immature, and I guess it's been paying off.

And thanks, I was giong for that sense of rivalry between the two. And don't worry, you will see more interaction between the two. Mainly it'll be in the present, but a couple of flashbacks are in order during the next chapter.

Also Chase is basically Mugen. Appearance and attitude, although his attitude becomes more Mugen-like when he loses his temper, or generally around Red. So it's not merely coincidence, but not entirely copy-right.



Well, this normally is where I'd talk about spelling and grammar issues that you might have, but it seems others have already pointed out most everything, so I'll just turn my attention elsewhere.


Oh-ho!



Back to Cloud, actually. This's something that bothered me a little since I started reading. He's nine years old, and yet...he's already four foot eight?! Wow. I don't know if I'd wanna see him after his growth spurt! xp Seriously though, most nine-year-olds I've seen are only maybe three and a half feet tall, maybe four at the very most. This just seemed...very strange to me.

Also, I know they were added for humorous purposes in this chapter and I'm probably the only one thinking this way, but I found I had a slight problem with the largely anime-style character reactions (enlarged head, chibi forms, etc), especially mixed within the overall dark atmosphere of the fic. To me, they just seemed...out of place, but again, that's just my worthless opinion. ;D

Overall, this is a promising work that carries a lot of potential. Now the question that remains is this: can you unlock that potential through your writing? Well, I think you can. XD Keep it up!

Oh...I didn't know nine-year olds were that short...geez...uh, maybe I'll change that in the profile...and everywhere else I mentioned his height...no big.

And about that...I dunno why, it just seemed an appropriate way to describe the comedy, y'know? I won't do it often, (I probably shouldn't do it at all) but I think it adds to the comedy. I mean, other than that, it'll still hold its darker tone. Think of it as a darker anime; it's still unique, in that it's not sun-shiney and full of rainbows, but still retains so of the qualities that all anime have.

...Y'know what, scratch that, I no longer like that idea. Bottom line, they won't appear often, because comedy won't appear often. However, you can be sure that they will be close to any comedic scene. But one thing I have to reprimand you for; never say that your opinion is worthless. Seriously, that's what I see reviews are for. To gain feedback from the readers, feedback that results from their opinions. These opinions will help make me a better author, able to see things from every angle before I submit the chapter. Do you wanna know how many times I change a specific parts in each chapter? Over 3 times for each major part, and about 12 times per chapter. Not because I'm finiky(SP?) but because I know by reading it again that I can make it better, more understandable to you all. That's why. Without your opinions, your feedback, chapters 4 and 5 wouldn't be the way they are. So please, never say your opinion is worthless. Thanks!

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UmbreonMaster
28th February 2006, 6:16 PM
Yeah I forgot you said Cloud was that tall...^^;; I wasn't thinking about that! XD Yep tall kid. ^^;;

Felix Feral Fezirix
28th February 2006, 7:06 PM
The chapter's tone is much more different from the rest by quite a bit, probably because most of the previous chapters are climatic chases. [Cloud: OMFG I'm being chased by Chase who's trying to beat me around with a stick!] But again, good job, and the smilie is disturbing. As well as other stuff that I just can't point out that makes the chapter comedic. Hmm....I was never good at pointing out parts of something that make it this or that and...You know. >_<

[/Pikachuism'ssermon]

[Cano]
28th February 2006, 11:06 PM
The chapter's tone is much more different from the rest by quite a bit, probably because most of the previous chapters are climatic chases. [Cloud: OMFG I'm being chased by Chase who's trying to beat me around with a stick!] But again, good job, and the smilie is disturbing. As well as other stuff that I just can't point out that makes the chapter comedic. Hmm....I was never good at pointing out parts of something that make it this or that and...You know. >_<

[/Pikachuism'ssermon]
Hey! What's goin' on man? WHat happened to your alter ego? Or was it...nevermind. Glad to hear from you, and glad to get another review.

Yeah, this chapter was different from the others; more comedic than anything. I wanted to try my hand at it, to make the characters seem more real. I figured that the whole 'this is my son, he is a good boy, and I love him' routine was played out. So I opted for the 'beat-your-father-with-a-stick-causing-him-to-give-chase-and-hurt-you' approach. However, thinking back on it...maybe what i chose to do was the real cliche...oh well.

I think the way I went with it was just as good; it fleshed out the characters a little more, adding to their personalities and giving them a more flawed-human look. So far I focused on the pain and suffering they deal with. While this was my main goal, to show the more grittier side of the pokemon world, I also wanted to show that through it all, they survive with themselves intact. That they know when to just let go and live...because life' too short. It's a gift that can be taken at any moment...and we should make the most of it! But anyway, that's just what I wanted to portray.

BTW, which similie are you referring to? >.< there were many...but whatever, i like weird similies, there funny and make things interesting. But I'm glad you liked it overall. :D

SPOILER ALERT!

The following scene has been adapted from Chapter 7. If you do not wish to read, DON'T! It's seriously a spoiler...would I lie to you? >;}

“Then you too believe that-“ Scyko began tentatively.

“No,” said Chase.

“Chase, you cannot honestly say that-“

“Yes I can,” Chase asserted, his irritation growing. He wished Scyko would end it there, but knew better. Scyko pressed on.


There ya go! Next chappie up tonight! Seeya then!
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UmbreonMaster
28th February 2006, 11:23 PM
OOH! SPOILER!! Nice spoiler. can't wait til tonight!

[Cano]
1st March 2006, 4:23 AM
[Rt-13+]
This chapter contains mild language, suggestive themes, as well as blood.


The World in Which We Live


“The pokémon…is talking to me…in my mind,” Cloud began, his voice slowly gaining back its strength, “I thought only Legendaries could do that.”

The shock first hit Scyko and Cano. Scyko’s eyes expanded to five times their normal size, and his face began to blush; he had always reacted strangely in awkward situations. Cano however merely placed his paw over his snout, as if to try and shield it from a horrendous stench. Cloud seemed to be the only one of the three unaffected by the truth he had just revealed…until the gravity of his statement hit like an Arcanine landing on his head. His eyes widened and welled up with tears; his teeth chattered as if the temperature suddenly dropped; several beads of sweat began to accumulate all over his body. He quickly covered his mouth with his hands, thinking that maybe he could keep the words from escaping…except he soon remembered, he had already said them!

Did I just say…what I think I said?! Cloud yelled at himself. How am I gonna’ cover that up? Aw geez…sorry Reynile.

“Hey…how’d you know that…?” Red questioned skeptically. His Pikachu leaned closer, positioning his ears as far as he could. Red squinted in suspicion; was there something this kid was hiding from him? Did he see it? He had to know, had to figure out…on way or another…the Legendaries already had their fair share of slaves.

The tension was minimal, but still clear; and it was continually building. His eyes darting quickly from Cloud to Red, Chase noticed something; Red’s stare was serious. His eyes held a torch whose flame burned as bright and hot as a Charizard’s tail during mating season. In his eyes Chase could clearly see the boy he met at Indigo Plateau. In his eyes, Chase found a memory. And in his eyes, it played as he watched.

The stage was set, the competitors were ready, and the crowd was in an uproar. Never in all of Kanto’s history had a battle to the top of the Indigo Ladder been as heart-wrenchingly exciting. There had been literally hundreds of competitors, all brimming with the feelings of success and determination. But success can only come to a small few; one to be exact. This was a battle-royal pitting the land’s strongest against one another in the ultimate test of perseverance, courage, and strategy. This was the Indigo Ladder.

The tension surrounding the arena was incredibly tangible, running smoothly between the very air molecules. The overall feeling shared by the audience was mind numbing enthusiasm, as bets were placed upon the favorites: all of them names learned by every man woman and child in Kanto. Names like Ryuu Okikawa, Sherice Landom, Satosuke Arkano and Ash Kett. There were even trainer’s from other lands, trying their hand at winning the Indigo Prism. But no one expected what occurred that magnificent day.

Two nobodies, apparently Kanto-born, stole the show; one by the name Chase Cloud Mugen, the other known as Shamato Red Simizima. The most memorable thing about the two was the pokémon they used. Simizima amazed all as he callously demolished the competition with nothing more than a Pikachu. The team seemed unstoppable; their movements and tactics were so fluid, it seemed their very memories of previous battles were being projected for all to see. None could doubt the skills this trainer possessed, and by the end of his third battle, half the audience had changed their tune, as they began to chant, ‘Red, Red, Red, Red!’

The other half of the stadium belonged to Chase Cloud Mugen. His irrational yet strategic style caught the eye of many, the admiration of some, and the envy of all.

“He just got lucky,” some grumbled in disappointment, “that Blastoise was the clear victor. Or it would’ve been, had that been a normal Growlithe!”

This was true, for his Growlithe was indeed unique; first off, its fur glowed a seemingly unnatural yellow; second, it was the size of an average Arcanine; third, it remained amazingly resistant to Water-type attacks. It seemed almost an impossible feat to achieve, a Fire-type resistant to Water attacks. Many speculated several theories, most of which were completely dumbfounded. These theories were soon abandoned however, due to Chase’s amazing winning streak. Whatever the rhyme or reason, he seemed to know exactly what he was doing, because he continued to win. Gradually he made his way up the Indigo Ladder, taking out every opponent that came his way; even Satosuke Arkano and Sherice Landom fell before his awesome power and superior battling skills.

And so they climbed; two nobodies out for nothing more than a challenge. Day by day, week by week, battle by battle, they gained support and recognition beyond their imaginings. The funniest thing however was how little they cared. By the month’s end only four were left; Chase Cloud Mugen, Ash Kett, Ryuu Okikawa, and Shamato Red Simizima. What followed were two of the most amazing battles ever to be witnessed in the history of our world, battles that knew no bounds, broke all barriers and literally redefined the profession of Pokémon Training.

When the dust settled, the final match-up was decided; Chase versus Red in the deciding battle for the Indigo Prism!

As his memories faded and his vision focused, something became visible in his eyes. An image, one of a younger man seemed forever embossed upon his eye. But that was then, that was the past. He had to focus on the present, had to focus on relieving the pressure that was still present among them. He took another glance at Red’s eyes. They hadn’t changed one bit; they were still fixed upon Cloud, still accusing him for a crime he may have well not committed…at least not knowingly. He didn’t like the stare he was giving his son…he didn’t like the assumptions it held.

“Whatddya mean how’d he know? Have you already forgotten our encounter so long ago?” interrupted Chase. As his eyes forcefully met Red’s, he raised his right eyebrow a gesture Red knew all to well; the familiar look in Chase’s eyes took him back to a time ten years prior.

The two of them were battered, beaten and bruised. Chase’s face bared several cuts, the blood from one particular wound located above his brow slowly seeping into his eyes; his legs were shaking, as if they were still deciding whether or not to give way; his left hand was covered in blood, blood that didn’t belong to him; his right hand had three broken knuckles, two fractured fingers and one hangnail; and the bicep on his left arm twitched in time with his heartbeat.
Red wasn’t any better off: his right eye was shut due to the continual blood flow from the wound inches above it; his legs were shaking as well, albeit more so than Chase’s; the blood belonging to his opponent was located on his right, the broken knuckles and fingers on his left; finally the bicep on his right arm twitched in time with his heartbeat.
It seemed to be an even match, just as it did before. Or so Red thought. He didn’t expect Chase to stagger over and deliver the final blow…

“Right…how could I have forgotten.”

The long-time rivals merely stared at one another, each determined to make his opponent falter. Cloud’s previous reaction was gone, replaced by one of pure curiosity and wonder. Scyko and Cano however, both breathed heavy sighs of relief, for they knew exactly what encounter Chase was mentioning. Poor Cloud was the only one left out of the loop. How he hated being the only one left ignorant; not that he knew he was the only one in this particular situation, but he naturally assumed it was so.

What were they talking about? What kind of encounter did they have? These questions filled his head, much as air fills a balloon. He was reaching the point at which he was fit to burst; he almost couldn’t hold in his frustration.

Why am I the only one who’s left holding the dunce cap? This isn’t fair! he scoffed to himself.

Just as he was ready to shout for answers, he realized that whatever the case may have been, at least he was off the hook…for now. And he was determined for it to stay that way.

“So…back to this Squirtle,” he mentioned, trying to draw attention to the odd turtle, “why is it that I can understand him?”

His question fell upon deaf ears, for Chase and Red continued to stare intensely at one another. Neither of them blinked for what seemed to be an eternity. He began to question whether or not they were truly friends. He decided to ask a little louder.

“I said, why can I understand him.”

“It’s because of the bond you share with him,” came Red’s voice as he looked away from Chase. His stare was lees intense now; back again was the kindness and understanding that he had arrived with.

After all, how can I hold a mere child responsible, when I have no proof that he even met a Legendary? I must have jumped the gun on this one…

“A bond? How’d that happen, I barely know this pokémon.”

“Yes, but you cared enough to save him when he needed it most. You risked your life to protect him, without hesitation. That’s what created the bond. Because of your selflessness, you were able to gain that Squirtle’s trust. In the end, that’s all you really need to understand a pokémon.”

Cloud’s eyes widened at this newfound realization. “Trust? Hmm…so that’s why…”

“Well Cano, this is it. I’m not going to be coming back for a while. I’ll miss you,” he told the giant pokémon, hugging it tightly. “Oh, and take care of Dad while I’m gone, ok?”
“Do not worry Cloud, Scyko and I have got it covered. You just worry about keeping yourself safe,” Cano growled in understanding

“It makes sense. So, this little turtle trusts me ey?” he said sarcastically, looking down at the odd looking turtle.

“Hey, what do you mean ‘little?!’” he growled angrily, a familiar tic-tac-toe of veins present on his bald head.

“I mean you’re short.”

“Well, you’re not exactly a skyscraper y’know,” was the Squirtle’s retort.

Meanwhile, Chase and Red merely stood by watching the nine-year-old argue with the pokémon like it was his imaginary friend; with looks of stupidity and wonder. Red turned and asked Chase if he could understand anything they were saying, to which Chase replied, “What’re you nuts?”

“But you see, I’m human soo I’ll naturally be forever taller than you,” Cloud teased.

“Tauros-****. You just wait till I’m a Blastoise, then we’ll see who’s taller!” the tiny turtle countered triumphantly snorting.

Cloud’s nose scrunched up as he pondered on the little creature’s words. Finally he asked, “What’s a Blastoise?”

“Finally, something I can understand!” rejoiced Chase.

Cloud gave him a puzzling look. Chase noticed his look and added, “Well you were talking like a Squirtle, so I couldn’t understand what the hell you were sayin’. Kinda freaky, really.”

“I was...talking like a Squirtle?” came his disbelieving response. It just didn’t seem possible. How could Cloud speak a language that he had never once studied, nor knew existed! That is until now.

“Well, yeah. I mean, why else would I just stand here, looking like an idiot?” Chase said to Cloud. He then quickly tossed a look of disgust toward Red, fiercely waving his index finger in his rival’s face, uttering, “Don’t say a goddamned thing!”

Red’s face was already aglow, his eyes glazed over from the mere thought of the infinite amount of insults he could cook up…until Chase’s words struck him, a very large mallet entitled, ‘DENIED!’ Once struck by the mallet, Red’s head jerked forward, his eyes almost leaving their sockets. He then hung his head in shame, upset that he let his opportunity slip. The air around him seemed to turn white as long dark lines becoming visible around his head. His Pikachu was no longer on his shoulder; it had instead, leapt to the ground nearest him, a look of pure enjoyment on his face. As he rubbed his little paws together, his face became nothing more than a toothy grin. Finally he leapt into the air, pointed at his trainer and shouted, “PI-KA!”

Red instantly came back to life, shouting even louder than Pikachu, “I was not ‘owned!’”

The Pikachu ignored his partner’s outburst and went on hopping happily, pointing and laughing, screaming the same phrase over and over again in a sing-song voice. Red’s head was steaming, the vapors clearly visible as they rose from his head. The only one more annoyed than Red was Chase; their little argument interrupted his chat with his son.

“Hey, losers,” he shouted over the noise from Red’s Pikachu.

“Huh?” came their simultaneous remarks. Before he had even uttered a word, Red’s face was scarlet with embarrassment.

Great, here it comes, he said readying himself.

A devious smile crept across Chase’s face, a smile of pure and utter satisfaction. He stood there smiling for a while, soaking up the feeling of opportunity, cherishing the very moment as if it were his last day on Earth. Then he spoke, “Oh man, where to go with this one. Okay first off, the fact that you both respond to ‘loser’ is hilarious. Actually, I’m not as surprised that you responded,” he went on, directing his first comment to Red, “but I had expected more of a challenge from the rodent. Second, I have no idea what ‘owned’ means, but you can’t laugh at him…”

“Pi?” asked the Pikachu, his left cheek being stretched by his partner.

“…because he’s your trainer,” he finished with a smirk.

The mouse seemed to take in every individual word, slowly mouthing them out in an effort to understand them. Then all at once, he understood, “? …chu,” and he let out a depressed sigh. Soon Pikachu was surrounded by the white background, his own black lines forming on the top of his head. Red let out a howl of laughter similar to Pikachu’s earlier outburst, but was cut short by a few short, ‘Pipipi, pika pi chu’s. Seconds later, trainer and pokémon were both enveloped in the white background, each brandishing their own black lines.

“Pff, what losers. Anyway, you had a question Cloud?”

He turned his attention over to his son who was playing with Scyko and Cano while he waited, the tiny Squirtle trying hard as he might to reach Cloud’s shoulders; apparently he had been inspired by Pikachu, and wanted to know the feeling first-hand.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I remember now! This little guy,” he began, patting Squirtle on the head, “said something about a Blastoise. I just wanted to know what that was.”

“A Blastoise? Well that’s simple; it’s his last evolutionary stage, that’s all.”

“Evolutionary stage? What’s that mean?”

“Ok, that…well…y’see…evolution…it’s like…hm…it’s like…a long, difficult process. Kinda like growth…I think. I’m not too sure how to explain it really; it’s actually kinda complicated.”

“For you maybe!” said Red, finally recovering from his daze. He climbed to his feet and made his way toward Chase. He stood next to his rival and began to speak, “Let me explain: evolution is most definitely a long and difficult process. Basically like growth-“

“Hey, I said that!”

“-but with a twist. You see, when humans grow, their outer appearance rarely changes. Beyond boys growing beards, and girls growing-“

“BRAINS!” Chase quickly interjected; he had suddenly become very sweaty, “G-girls grow brains, son! A-he-he-he, ugh.”

“-riiight…brains. Anyway, with pokémon it’s entirely different. A pokémon changes it outer appearance as it grows. This kinda growth sometimes takes place over a long period of time, and sometimes in an instant. This time depends on many factors, some known some unknown. The longer the evolutionary process, the more visible the changes; meaning you can literally watch your pokémon change little by little, from stage one to two as well as the little stages in between.
“So, think you got all that Cloud?”

They two veterans stared at Cloud, watching intently for any kind of response. Hopefully on that showed he understood was they were talking about. Cloud took his hand to his chin, while his other held his opposite elbow; he was thinking!

“My boy’s smart ain’t he?” gloated Chase as he looked over at his friend.

“Yeah. Guess he came out like his mom huh?” replied Red.

“Yeah…he sure did…”

“…girls grow brains?” was what first left Cloud’s lips.

“Real genius you’ve got there Chase,” Red sarcastically pointed out, his right eyebrow raised.

“Guess he came out like me after all…stuck on the opposite sex.”

Cloud continued on, “I don’t believe that! Janice is older than me, and I know she hasn’t gotten any smarter! Though, there was something different about her…now that I think on it, she had a bigger-”

“OH-K! That’s enough of that! Can we please get back to the discussion on pokémon evolution?!” Chase once again interrupted. It seems he never got around to talking to Cloud about the differences between boys and girls.

“But-“

“NO! Geez, enough already! You’re too young for that kinda talk! I mean, for God’s sake, you’re only nine! Wait a year or two, ok?!” he continued, laughing nervously.

“Ugh…I guess I’ll skip the explanation on Breeding for now…” Red sighed.

“Breeding?” Cloud asked curiously.

“AHHH!”
__________________________________________________ _________________________

“Ok, so what you’re saying is, that this Squirtle will evolve?”

“Precisely. Twice actually.”

It was later in the day at this point; Chase had finally gone home and had taken Scyko and Cano with him. He left behind his only son and his toughest rival. But in the same token, he left behind a rookie trainer to be taught by the greatest in the world. And that was what mattered most; of that he was certain.

“Are you sure it’s ok to leave the two of them together?” questioned Scyko. His heart sought the answer his mind already knew.

“Well, let’s ask Cano. I mean, of the three of us, he’s clearly the most protective.”

“Hmph. Say whatever you please; I am not ashamed by the way I act. I provide what I never had: love, protection, and acceptance. Besides, I made a promise years back, as did Scyko. I promised to protect him with all my strength, even with my very life. I for one like to think that I held up my end,” answered Cano.

“You call that an answer?” replied Chase.

“Of course. What else could I call it?”

“Long-winded, that’s for damn sure.”

“Ha-ha, seems you’re back to normal. However, Cano does not,” suggested Scyko.

“What are you implying?” scoffed Cano.

“Only that you seem a tad more rational at the moment. Doesn’t seem like you at all really.”

“Would you feel more comfortable if I were to Slash out your throat?” Cano asked while cocking his head slightly to the left.

“Uh…n-no. Not at all really,” stuttered Scyko.

“HA-HA-HA-HA! You guys sure do make an odd couple. Greatest tag-team ever, but complete opposites,” laughed Chase as he stared at his best friends. They stared back, each slowly gaining the same joy felt inside of Chase. It seemed the bond they all shared allowed them to psychically share their emotions…or was it Scyko projecting his own feelings? Either way, none of them could stifle their laughter as it floated to the surface of their throats much like a leaf does when placed over a thermal.

It was one of those laughs that is uninhibited, unchained and spontaneous; it was a real laugh. A laugh that true friends share with one another over something as common as someone slipping on a banana peel; a laugh that frees the soul from its own dark prison deep within the confines of the body, wherever it is truly located. In short, a real laugh. The kind of laugh that brings tears to the eyes, along with stealing the breath from our very lungs. A rare kind of laugh experienced at most twice in one lifetime. Chase was fortunate enough to share this kind of laughter many a time, thanks to his faithful companions.

However, it did not last long. Chase’s mind kept traveling back to his son and what he had said earlier, about the Legendaries. He had to know for sure whether Red’s suspicions were ill-placed. So he posed his question, “Cloud was revived by a Legendary, wasn’t he? And please, don’t lie to me. I know the he died earlier today, and only something very powerful could bring him back. So tell me.”

The joyous laughter had since ceased, followed by an eerie silence the likes of which the trio had never witnessed. It was Cano who broke this silence.

“Yes…it seems the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree after all…”

“…Cloud…” Chase let out a depressed sigh. How could he have let this happen? How could he have not seen this coming? His son, now a slave of the Legendaries, just as his father had once been. It was a fate that Chase never in his wildest nightmares thought to put his son through. And now it was to be his nightmare.

“…So who was it? Anybody we know?”

“It called himself…Reynile,” supplied Scyko. Chase thought on this statement, trying to remember the name, maybe even place it with a face. He came up blank.

“Never heard of ‘im. So, what’s it like? Hopefully not a stuck up buffoon, drunk with power like Mew, that vain *****.”

“No. Surprisingly, it’s different. It too hates the Legendaries, as well as the entire status they occupy. It seems…normal,” said Cano in surprise. This was the first he had ever truly thought about Reynile since first meeting it.

“I see…an outcast. Perfect.”

They continued onward in silence, each thinking the same thoughts as the other: Why Reynile? Why Cloud? Was it destiny? Was it coincidence? Or was it vengeance? Whatever the reason this much was certain: Cloud’s life was no longer his own.

It was when they reached the site of Chase’s last battle that he spoke again. Stepping on the grounds lit a spark that ignited the dynamite that was his memories. Like an explosion, the battle replayed itself in a chaotic fashion, every detail vivid as the hairs on his hand. His memories stopped upon the leader of the three Shadows. Something about him wasn’t right. He could sense it.

“Do you two remember the trio that attacked my boy?”

“Yes, vividly. They were Shadows weren’t they? Tough ones at that. Why do you ask?” chirped Scyko, his interest piqued.

“There was something odd about their leader…He had an aura around him…it was practically visible.”

“Their leader was a woman,” correct Cano. Chase’s face flinched slightly.

“So…it was a woman. That explains the other feeling I had.”

“So you felt it too?” Scyko beckoned.

“Yeah, I felt it.”

“As did I,” added Cano. Scyko was feeling bolder now, and again decided to ask a question to which he already knew the answer.

“Then you too believe that-“

“No.”

“Chase, you cannot honestly say that-“

“Yes I can,” Chase asserted, his irritation growing. He wished Scyko would end it there, but knew better. Scyko pressed on.

“But-“

“NO!” Chase had stopped dead in his tracks now, blood dripping from his tightly clenched fists. Suddenly he struck a tree, causing several leaves to fall like rain at his feet. Scyko and Cano watched on from a distance; it was safest for the forest that he be allowed to take out his rage on one tree rather than hundreds.

“No…”

And with that he removed his bloody fist from the truck and began to trudge on home, a deepening sadness enveloping him. Scyko sighed to himself before he continued to follow. Cano however stood behind a short while, pondering to himself. Suddenly, he looked down at his paw and began to lick back the hairs, revealing four similar white scars all perfectly aligned and spaced evenly. He snorted to himself, but then became saddened.

Sometimes…I’m glad I cannot cry. But others, I seem cursed to never shed a tear.

************************************************** *************************
Well, there you have it! All proofread and ready to review! In this chapter I toned down the humor (though it's till present) as well as allowed Scyko and Cano human-like speech capabilities. However, it's only due to the fact that Cano and Scyko trust both Chase and Cloud. This kind of speech will only take place when the trusting pokemon is communicating with its owner. So, while Scyko and Cano talk to Chase or Cloud, it will be in a dialogue that my readers can understand. However, if it is a conversation between them, or another pokemon, their speech will remain untranslated.

Chapter End


Next Time: Finally...Barden Town...
Red finally emerged from his pack with a large egg in hand. It was yellow with thick black stripes positioned at pivotal points around it. He[Cloud] counted and came up with three. He thought he saw a fourth, and decided to examine it further, when the egg jerked violently in Red’s hands.

Scared shitless, Cloud crawled backward several feet, eyes wide with wonder and shock. He then asked dumbly, “There’s something in there…isn’t there?”

“Mmhmm,” Red replied nodding, “and it’s about ready to come out. Let’s watch.”

UmbreonMaster
3rd March 2006, 6:34 AM
Alright! Nice Chapter!! I really don't got much to say the way my day's going...-_-;; Anyways keep it up!

~UM~;197;

Valkyrie X
6th March 2006, 4:38 AM
I apologize for the late review. But here we go...

This was truly a wonderful chapter, probably one of your best yet. The flow and feel of the entire thing was absolutely excellent, as was pretty much everything else.

The description was amazing, as usual. Once again, you elaborated wonderfully on the characters' thoughts and feelings, and described many other things (such as the bruises and blood on Chase and Red) very well, also. Yes...you have no problems with description at all, really. Great job on this part.

The length of this chapter was perfect, just like most of your other chapters. It was very large, juicy, and satisfactory...kind of like a good steak. Wow, what a comparison. o_O But hey, it makes sense. =P

Grammar and spelling were great. I also noticed that you really took the time to proofread this chapter. Still, I did catch a few tiny little errors, but they're really nothing. =/ But good job on proofreading; it's a good step for you.

I sincerely enjoyed the humor in this chapter, though there was still a rather dark mood to it. I found Cloud's and the Squirtle's argument hilarious, especially when the Squirtle said "Tauros-sh*t!" :p And that "girls grow brains" part gave me a good laugh. Breeding and evolution...LMAO. XD

But what truly impressed me was the part in which you described the Indigo tournament with Chase, Red, and all those other competitors. The sheer feeling of determination and competitiveness you gave it was downright incredible. It was as if I was actually in the tournament among the audience, watching the trainers fight their way to victory. I don't think I've ever read a scene that held as much battle-ness (how else am I supposed to describe it? D: ) as this one. I applaud you on it...This one flashback just blew me away completely. It's rare that I read something as breathtaking as this.

Keep up the amazing work...I look forward to the next chapter.

;381;ZR;380;

[Cano]
6th March 2006, 5:17 AM
First off [Zennou Ryuu] I want to say, thanks for reviewing again, no matter how late! I'm just glad you made it!

And now for the rest of your review:


I apologize for the late review. But here we go...

This was truly a wonderful chapter, probably one of your best yet. The flow and feel of the entire thing was absolutely excellent, as was pretty much everything else.

Why thank you! I worked hard on making sure everything was close to perfect for this chapter. There were many a time that I was drifting off topic while writing it, as well as times were certain things appeared to 'Just happen out of nowhere,' in which I tryed to make them flow into each other, to get rid of that annoyance. It truly pleases me to hear that I did a good job.

The description was amazing, as usual. Once again, you elaborated wonderfully on the characters' thoughts and feelings, and described many other things (such as the bruises and blood on Chase and Red) very well, also. Yes...you have no problems with description at all, really. Great job on this part.

:D thankie!

The length of this chapter was perfect, just like most of your other chapters. It was very large, juicy, and satisfactory...kind of like a good steak. Wow, what a comparison. o_O But hey, it makes sense. =P

Steak huh? Yesh, it does doesn't it?

Grammar and spelling were great. I also noticed that you really took the time to proofread this chapter. Still, I did catch a few tiny little errors, but they're really nothing. =/ But good job on proofreading; it's a good step for you.

MISTAKES?! Blasphemy! I actually proofread this time! GRRR!! ...just kidding xD thanks for catching those. Guess my eyes weren't as hawk-like as I thought. And yay to progress, nay to congress! xP

I sincerely enjoyed the humor in this chapter, though there was still a rather dark mood to it. I found Cloud's and the Squirtle's argument hilarious, especially when the Squirtle said "Tauros-sh*t!" :p And that "girls grow brains" part gave me a good laugh. Breeding and evolution...LMAO. XD

I wanted there to be comedy, but I also wanted to get back to the dark aspect of the story, to progress it further.

Cloud and Squirtle...you can already see where this relationship is going huh? xD also, I decided that 'Tauros' was synonomus with 'bull' so why not?

HAHAHA! Girls grow brains...or rather, they believe they do! x.X just kidding, naturally...so that bit went well ey? I was wondering how funny that would appear to you all. but I've since laid those wonders to rest.

B&E...xD

But what truly impressed me was the part in which you described the Indigo tournament with Chase, Red, and all those other competitors. The sheer feeling of determination and competitiveness you gave it was downright incredible. It was as if I was actually in the tournament among the audience, watching the trainers fight their way to victory. I don't think I've ever read a scene that held as much battle-ness (how else am I supposed to describe it? D: ) as this one. I applaud you on it...This one flashback just blew me away completely. It's rare that I read something as breathtaking as this.

Was it that realistic? Wow, I truly can amaze, can't I? With all seriousness of course; I don't want anyone to think of me as though I'm becoming full of myself. But thank you very much. I was going for a sense of understanding, but I guess I went beyond that huh? I never imagined to read that you or any of my reviewers felt they were actually there.

:D glad I decided to place those flashbacks in the chapter after all. I was a little iffy on whether or not I should add them, but in the end I took a chance. Glad you liked the one!

Keep up the amazing work...I look forward to the next chapter.

I will. Believe it.

;381;ZR;380;

And to [UmbreonMaster], thanks again for reviewing! Glad you're still willing to read after my long hiatus! You're a true friend and reviewer, and I'm glad I met you, as well as [Zennou Ryuu]. I thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, and from the depths of my very soul as it writhes and wriggles somewhere within my body. Thank you.
[Cano]

[Cano]
7th March 2006, 2:58 AM
[Rt-13+]
This chapter contains mild language.


Finally…Barden Town…

Cloud laid back, his head hitting a particularly soft patch of grass.

Almost like a pillow, he thought smiling. He lay there, trying desperately to make sense of everything that had happened today. His death, his resurrection, the Shadows, Red, his father, the Squirtle…thinking about it made his head hurt. He just couldn’t understand how all of these things could take place in exactly one day.

What would someone older, more mature do? his voice asked, curious to know the answer. Try to understand it all, one piece of information at a time, I guess.

“Hey kid.”

The sound of Red’s voice broke his concentration, and brought him back to the Verd Forest. He was staring up at the numerous branches, intertwining themselves into an elaborate and surprisingly intricate web that captured the sunlight, or possibly the moonlight, preventing it from entering. The leaves were all a dark color, presumably green due to the hue of the darkness, and the branches were strong and thick like a hiker’s arms; another reason why the formation of the ‘web’ was an interesting natural occurrence.

He sat up and met Red’s gaze, his Pikachu off by the burrow, playing ‘Hide-n-Seek’ with the red Squirtle, who was now affectionately named ‘Butt-head’…or so he was led to believe.

“Yeah?” he replied after a long while, feeling a tad rude for not answering sooner. Red’s gaze never faltered, but at the same time, his eyes calculated his next response, checking every possible outcome from every possible phrase. Finally he spoke.

“Which one did you see? Of the Legendaries I mean.”

A frog seemed to have mysteriously lodged itself in Cloud’s throat, intent on making it its new home. Hard as he tried to swallow, it just wouldn’t go down; it felt like he had tried to eat something, and it stopped halfway. He felt like he needed a drink of water, though his mouth wasn’t dry at all. Red must’ve noticed his uneasy reaction to the question, because he began shaking his head in disappointment.

“Y’know what? Forget it. It doesn’t matter,” he retracted, still shaking his head as he spoke, “Just know this: it may seem cool and honorable, but it’s not; it’s actually the exact opposite. It’s degrading, disgusting and detestable.”

Cloud was confused; what did this have to do with seeing a Legendary? He hadn’t even had the time to ask, because what Red said next erased all doubt and wonder.

“Your resurrection is like a binding contract with them. A contract in which you pledge to be their slave; a ‘Chosen One’ as they like to call it. And the **** of it is, you don’t even get to choose if you want to sign.”

Check one thing off Cloud’s list-of-things-to-understand: Price for resurrection. And that thought didn’t exactly comfort him; in fact, it made him feel worse.

“A…slave? But why? Why me?” he questioned. Red just looked on down the forest, the thickness of the trees practically suffocating him. With a shake of his head his replied, “I have no idea.”

Cloud suddenly burst into a whine, “But this isn’t fair! I didn’t even do anything to deserve this! I didn’t ask for it, so why should I have to pay for it?”

“Why? Heh, good question. Why don’t you ask one of them? I’m sure they can enlighten you,” Red spat bitterly. Cloud’s thoughts began swimming again, the bars and barricades separating them now gone.

“How do you know all this? Are you a Chosen One too?” he asked. Red’s reaction was a typical scoff and mutter of curses under his breath. Cloud waited for him to finish, hoping against hope that he’d get an answer. It never came. He posed the question again…or rather he tried, before Red interrupted him by saying, “I don’t wanna talk about it right now.”

Cloud felt ashamed; he had never been silenced before, never been treated like a child…until today. It seemed that everyone around him had started to take his age into account more now, and therefore felt the need to withhold information from him. It was a very awkward and lonely feeling and he hated it. So in an attempt to cast away the silence, he asked a more pokémon-related question.

“How come your Pikachu hasn’t evolved?”

Red’s facial expression seemed to soften at the sound of a normal question. He turned to Cloud and began, matter-of-factly, “There’s a very simple answer: he doesn’t want to.”

Again Cloud found himself holding the bad end of the ‘ignorant’ stick.

“So, evolution takes into account the pokémon’s willingness to evolve?” he guessed. Red again shook his head.

“Not entirely, no. You see, regardless of whether a pokémon wants to evolve or not, it will evolve. Unless that pokémon evolves through the power of a certain material, such as an Elemental Stone,” Red stated importantly.

“Let me elaborate: there are a total of six Elemental Stones. Fire, Water, Leaf, Thunder, Sun and Moon. Each stone holds the power of its element. So when held by a pokémon of the same element, that particular pokémon can tap into the power of the stone and use it to its advantage. However, there are certain pokémon that evolve through the powers of these special stones.
“Take Pikachu for instance,” he continued, pointing over to the now hiding Pikachu, “if I were to give him a Thunder Stone, his chemical make-up would be physically altered by the stone, causing an evolution. So to recap; Squirtle plus Water Stone equals power boost, while Pikachu plus Thunder Stone equals evolution to Raichu. You with me so far?”

Cloud was busy running a mental picture through his head. It consisted of his Squirtle holding a stone made of water as it transformed into a Squirtle seemingly on ‘roids, and a Pikachu holding a stone made of lightning transforming into…a silhouette. Of course he had no idea what a Raichu looked like, but he imagined it to be considerably bigger than a Pikachu.

“Yeah, so far so good.”

Red nodded, “Great. Now, moving on: with evolution by stone, there are two main factors to consider. The first being possession of the stone; if you don’t have the proper stone, don’t even think about evolution. Second, is the pokémon’s willingness; if a pokémon is content they way it is, it won’t change. And that’s basically it on ‘Stone Evolution.’”

“One: get the right stone. Two: make sure pokémon agrees to change,” he recited, “Got it! Ok what’s next?”

Red placed his hand in front of his face, his fingers extended.

“Well let’s see. We talked about ‘Normal Evolution’ and ‘Stone Evolution.’ We covered ‘TM’s’ and ‘Move-sets,’” he said, tallying with his fingers, “we talked about girls,” he smirked without tallying, “so that leaves ‘Evolution by Friendship’ and ‘Breeding.’”
“We’ll start with ‘Breeding’ since it’s most commonly-linked with ‘Evolution by Friendship.’ Pokémon breeding is how pokémon are born. When you have two pokémon of the same species mate (meaning they’re both of different genders) you get what’s commonly referred to as a ‘baby pokémon.’ Baby Pokémon are as their name implies; baby versions of the aforementioned pokémon.”

“Like my Squirtle?” Cloud spoke up quickly. He was sure to get this right; Red had called the creature a baby once before.

“Not exactly. You see, while your Squirtle is still an infant, it’s not considered a baby pokémon. Your Squirtle is a ‘Basic Pokémon’; meaning that it’s ready able to fend for itself. Baby pokémon are differe…Y’know what? Lemme show you what I mean,” he finished, reaching into his rucksack. Cloud heard the clanking of Pokéballs and Potions, along with the ching-ching of money. Red finally emerged from his pack with a large egg in hand. It was yellow with thick black stripes positioned at pivotal points around it. He counted and came up with three. He thought he saw a fourth, and decided to examine it further, when the egg jerked violently in Red’s hands.

Scared shitless, Cloud crawled backward several feet, eyes wide with wonder and shock. He then asked dumbly, “There’s something in there…isn’t there?”

“Mmhmm,” Red replied nodding, “and it’s about ready to come out. Let’s watch.”

The egg continued to jostle and move in Red’s hands. The convulsions were so violent and sporadic, that it’s a wonder he didn’t drop it! As the egg’s violent spasms continued, a loud and violent cracking sound could be heard, along with a visible fissure in the egg’s shell, heading from its peak down toward its base. Little by little more cracks appeared, the most important of which were located parallel to both the base and peak as well as one extending from the peak to the base. Pieces of the egg shell soon began to fall. However, none of these ‘important’ splits ever came into contact, but they were getting closer with each sickening crack. They were about one centimeter apart when all movement from the egg finally ceased.

The air silent now, Cloud sifted uneasily in his seat. He raised his eyes to Red, as if to ask, ‘What happened?’ but the only responses he got were a smile and a nod. Grumpily, he sat hard on his rear end, arms folded, his brow curled and etched with impatience. Until something caught his eye; the egg’s movement had returned! But it was not the same. It seemed to tremble slightly, as if a mini-Earthquake was used from within the egg itself.

The trembling became increasingly more violent, more noticeable over time. Soon an electric charge covered the egg as it quaked, and soon after it began to match the quakes. Every so often, the quakes would increase in magnitude, as would the electrical field, and every so often, the quakes would almost completely die down, along with the electrical field encompassing the egg.

After about two-and-a-half minutes of this trend, the quakes reached an all-time high; the electrical field stronger than ever, brighter than anything presently in the forest. Then, just before the light from the electrical field became blindly bright, and caused Cloud to look away as he shielded his eyes with his arm, one final ‘CRACK!’ was heard.

The light died and five seconds later, Cloud’s sight returned. The feeling that now overwhelmed him was that of complete joy; like being born again, everything he saw seemed fresh, new, and magnificently vibrant. The smells in the air were exhilarating, and breath-taking; Cloud took three great sniffs, taking in every smell for the first time, unable to distinguish the smell of pokémon dung from the smell of the sweet, sweet oaks, and unable to find a reason to care. He felt the tangible feeling of life from the very ground upon which he sat, felt the very molecules that made up the air he breathed. He even felt his soul, bubbling beneath the surface of his outer shell.

And then came the sounds; oh how wonderful they were! First was the soft rustling of the leaves up high in the trees; next was the light patting of padded foot as it struck the soft earth; next was the almost inaudible sound of the very wind as it slowly passed his ear, caressing him ever so gently, like a mother caresses her young; and finally the whispered chatter of creatures almost directly behind him.

He turned slowly, enjoying the sound of his body rotating, a smile bold and clearly present on his face. When he was finally turned completely around, he took in a marvelous sight; two pokémon, one mouse-like in shape and size, the other resembling a tiny turtle, were hovering over a the lap of one man. As they chattered softly into his lap, Cloud noticed the man was holding something. He slowly made his way toward the trio, desperately curious to the apparent phenomena the man was holding.

As he approached, the two pokémon turned to watch him, grins as wide as their little heads. The turtle was earless, with eyes as big as household eggs, though they were at present, closed; its face was wide and full, much like a baby’s, complete with pinch-able cheeks. His skin was a light reddish-yellow, his underbelly a bright maize; his arms were short and fat, like an infant’s, his three fingers severely out of proportion and his legs were the same. Most unique about this turtle was its tail, for unlike most of its reptilian counterparts, its tail was long, extending about one quarter of a foot from its shell’s posterior curling at the very end giving it a cinnamon bun-like swirl. What made it even more unique was that it was possibly the only part of this reptile that was covered with fine hairs, affectively matching the turtle’s complexion so well that they were practically invisible.

The mouse was no taller, and no shorter than the turtle, and unlike the turtle it was covered in a coarse coat of fur, from the tip of its long pointed ears to the tip of its lightning shaped tail; the tips of its ears were jet black and extended down for about three inches or so, creating the image of an arrow head when both ears were placed close together; the base of its tail was a creamy smooth hazel hue, extending until just before the first abrupt turn in the tail’s shape. On its back it bore two stripes of the same hue as the base of its tail, each ovular in shape as well as placed parallel horizontally over its back. Its rosy red circular cheeks were located on either side of its face, and were the apparent source of its power. Its eyes the size of coins, black as the night sky and clear as a natural spring, while its nose was triangular in shape and placed in the center of its face. Its forelegs were thin and muscular, ending in a five fingered paw, while its back legs were short and stout, ending in a three toed paw. Its face was also rather wide, particularly around its cheeks, as was its mid-section.

Both continued grinning as he crept closer. Then the turtle spoke. It said, “So you wanna see the baby too? It’s extremely cute. Kinda reminds me of my little brothers, when they were first born.”

Cloud’s excitement rose infinitely at the word ‘baby’ as he spoke hushed, back to the reptile. He turned to ask the mouse a question, but could not understand its response. As it continued with its ‘Pika’s and ‘Pi’s, he nodded his head nervously chuckling to himself, Oh well, at least I can understand one of ‘em.

Finally, he had reached his destination, the man’s lap and hands clearly visible as well as the treasure in those hands. He looked up at the man in complete disbelief. The man looked back at him and said in a whisper, “This, Cloud, is a Pichu, the baby stage of all Pikachu.”

Cloud slowly moved his eyes downward resting them upon the phenomena that had piqued his curiosity so. In the hands of the man, who was now surrounded by a nine-year-old boy and two pokémon, was the tiniest sleeping creature that Cloud had ever laid his eyes on. It was similar to the mouse pokémon to his left, yet different all at once. Its ear were shaped like arrowheads, with yellow fur in a triangular shape while the outline of these triangles were jet black; its tail was small and ‘L’ shaped, and was also jet black; its face was rounder than its older counterpart, its eyes also slightly larger, its cheeks just as rosy and just as powerful, if not more so and its nose was miniscule and hazel. Below its chin was a formation of triangles that adorned its neck like a necklace, a necklace that seemed to bear a striking resemblance to a set of fangs. This was also jet black in color, though the fur here was of a fine texture, unlike the rest of its body, which was coarse and yellow. Lastly, its front paws possessed one finger, while its rear possessed three.

It stirred cutely, raising its front-left paw to its mouth as it yawned; its audience nearly melted at this sight, letting out several ‘Aw’s. Then it began to raise its bottom while simultaneously moving it backward and keeping its front paws in their original positions, much like a cat does when trying to stretch out its forelegs. It seemed that this act also deserved several ‘Aww’s from the four individuals that closely watched it.

Its ears twitched at every sound made; it sniffed the air eagerly yearning to take in every single smell possible, and it nearly fell doing so.

“It’s…adorable,” said Cloud’s voice; it sounded far away, as if he were at the end of a long hall in an empty building. He turned his gaze for a moment back to the man holding the creature, this tiny adorable mouse, and asked, “What will you call it?”

The man stared back, his smile growing wider, “Well, what would you call it?”

Cloud’s heart jumped into his throat as his mind raced with one phrase present in the driver’s seat: Is he going to do what I think? He cleared his throat lightly and spoke in a raspy voice, “I-I would call it…I would call it…what would I call it?”

“If it helps, it’s a female,” the man pushed softly, sensing his troubles. Cloud thought a little more, taking in this information. The man watched as his face went from one of hesitation and uncertainty to one of confirmation and faith. He spoke with pride when he said, “Trici. Her name would be Trici.”

The man, whom Cloud know recognized to be Red, nodded in agreement.

“A fine name for her,” he began, “so that is the name she shall keep. Trici…y’know, it seems that you may have a knack for naming pokémon, just like your mother.”

“My mother?”

“Yeah. Y’know, she’s the one who named your father’s pokémon…or at least she was the inspiration. Maybe he’ll tell you the stories behind their names one of these days. So, what will you name your other pokémon?” he asked, aiming his attention at the Squirtle.

“Hmm? Oh, I dunno. Maybe I’ll ask him. He probably already has a name,” Cloud assumed. He turned to face the tiny reptilian creature, a look of curiosity on his face. The Squirtle looked back, still gleeful from the hatchlings antics; she was testing the boundaries of her little ‘pedestal.’ He then asked, “Is there something wrong?”

“No, not at all really. I was just wondering if you would mind being given a nickname. I mean, I don’t want to just give you one if you like the name you already have,” Cloud responded. The Squirtle’s once gleeful expression quickly turned to one of sorrow. Tears began to well in his eyes and he quickly broke his glance from Cloud. Worried, Cloud reached out to comfort the tiny reptile, only to have his hand swatted away. Furiously rubbing his hurt hand, Cloud tossed Red a look of confusion. Red returned a look of patience and understanding, and nodded as if signaling Cloud to try again. So he did, and this time, the Squirtle allowed himself a comforting pat.

He began to sob uncontrollably at his touch, but Cloud continued to pat him while saying, “It’s ok…it’s ok. Let it out, let it all out.”

Cloud wasn’t sure what had brought about this sudden outburst, but he was sure that the Squirtle would share his feelings when he was ready. As he pat the Squirtle continuously, his sobs slowly began to die, enabling him to communicate a little more than before. Between sobs, the Squirtle spoke. He said, “I-can’t-remember-my-name! I-just-can’t!”

The rest was incomprehensible. So Cloud took the tiny pokémon into his arms and held on tight, tears falling down his own face as well. Minutes passed, filled with tears and comforting. When the tears stopped flowing, and apologies were made, the Squirtle continued to explain his nameless situation.

“…I remember my family…and I remember my old home. But I don’t remember my name, or the names of my brothers, or the name of our island…I can’t remember any of it. Not since I was taken. When they came, everything went dark. I remember screaming and fighting…I remember pain…and then I remember the prison I was placed in. And that’s all.”

“I’m…so sorry. I didn’t know…if only I did, I’d have nev-“

“Forget it. It’s ok, ‘cuz up until you mentioned it, I’d forgotten that too…and I didn’t want to forget anymore.”

The overall mood in the air was a bad one; the euphoria that had once taken hold of everyone was gone again, just as quickly as it’d come. Wait…it was gone! That fast?! Where’d it come from?

“Red! Why were we all happy a minute ago? And why aren’t we now?” questioned Cloud curiously. Red glanced up from the baby Pichu, Trici; she was sleeping once more.

“Hm? Oh that. That was a byproduct of this little one’s hatching. You see, when a baby pokémon is born, every living thing in the immediate area becomes overwhelmed with a sense of euphoria. It’s a projection of the baby’s feelings at that moment, because everything is so new to them; the sights, the sounds, the tastes, the smells. To those around them, it’s almost as if they too are being born. But it’s only temporary of course, so that’s why it’s gone.”

“Oh.”

It made sense to him now, for Cloud could remember his odd fascination with the smell of animal **** moments earlier. He shuddered at the thought; leave it to a baby to make him love the smell of poo. As he shivered once more from the thought, the Squirtle came and pulled his shirt to get his attention.

“So Cloud…I like the name you gave Trici, and seeing as how I can’t remember mine…can you give me one too?” asked the turtle shyly, carving his feet into the ground. Cloud smiled happily at him and said, “Sure. How about…Hydrix?”

The Squirtle frowned at the name, and replied disappointedly, “Seems you forgot how to name pokémon…I mean, how could you go from ‘Trici’ to that!”

Offended by the pokémon’s comment, Cloud growled, “If you didn’t like it, then just say so, you ungrateful Butt-head!”

“Well-I-don’t-like-it!” the turtle retorted through gritted teeth. Boy this squirtle really knew how to push Cloud’s buttons. His anger reaching its peak, Cloud spat, “Well how about Aqtile? How’s that one for ya, you self-absorbed, know-it-not!?”

“That doesn’t make any sense!”

“Neither does your face!”

“What?!”

“What?!”

“Ogh, whatever. Say, what was that name you mentioned earlier?” he asked.

“Agtile?”

The turtle stopped in consideration of this new name, to which Cloud rolled his eyes thinking, You have got to be kidding me. I wasn’t being serious when I picked that one!

After several moments of consideration, the tiny reptile raised his head from his chin and nodded in approval. Cloud couldn’t help but chuckle at the irony; in an attempt to be as insulting as possible, he threw out the name ‘Aqtile’ and that was the name the Squirtle accepted. What could be funnier?

“So it’s decided; Aqtile and Trici. Both very good names for two aspiring pokémon, don’t you think Cloud?” smiled Red, thinking to himself, Agtile?!

“Yeah, I guess…so, what’s to become of Trici?” he asked, hoping beyond hope for the one answer that would make him happy.

“Well, you tell me. After all, I’m not her trainer.”

Cloud’s heart swelled with happiness, and he nearly jumped for joy at the sound of those words. Positively beaming, he asked whether or not Red was truly giving her to him, to which he responded, “Duh.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Now remember, she’s still a baby, so she cannot fight under any circumstances. To do so could endanger her very life. Oh, and don’t worry about not understanding her; after all, you have yet to gain her trust. Also, don’t keep her in a Pokéball just yet. She’ll learn more if you carry her around with you.
“Well, that’s about all I can remember, so have a great adventure Cloud. I hope to see you again one day.”

Cloud replayed Red’s parting words over and over in his head as he stared at his two new pokémon; Trici the Pichu, and Aqtile the Squirtle. He smiled at himself; he had started this day hoping to get a starter pokémon of his very own, and instead he got two. He no longer cared that it was nightfall, and that he was late beyond all hopes of getting a starter from the Professor of Barden. All that mattered now was getting there and getting some rest.

With Aqtile in the lead, brandishing Cloud’s flashlight, the entire path was exposed to them as they walked. They took each step with pride, for their journey had finally begun, their pasts finally behind them. Aqtile looked back at Cloud as he walked, holding the flashlight in both hands. Cloud smiled at his new friend and asked, “Something the matter?”

Agtile shook his head, “No, just wondering is all.”

“’Bout what?”

“’Bout this place we’re headed to. What do you think it’s like?”

“It’s a beautiful quaint little town, where everybody knows everyone by their first names. A town where children run without the fears of the outdoors, a place where kindness and civility are abundant and abound. The true home of compassion.”

“Wow,” sighed Agtile, tears in his eyes, “that was beautiful Cloud!”

“Huh? Well of course it was! I mean, how else is a brochure supposeta’ sound?” was Cloud response. Aqtile reached for a rock, and threw it at Cloud’s face, hitting him dead between the eyes.

Rubbing his face with his free hand, while dropping his brochure he said furiously, “What was that for?!”

“You made me believe you were saying all those nice things, like you really knew what you were talking about!” raged Aqtile, pointing his finger at Cloud angrily.

“Well it’s not my fault you’re retarded!” Cloud shot back. They argued back and forth, until Trici’s crying forced them to stop in consideration. As Cloud went to calming her, Aqtile continued onward, quietly subduing his rage.

They continued to walk silently on; Trici asleep in Cloud’s arms as he walked, Cloud walking in short quick strides, Agtile marching forward. Suddenly, Aqtile shined the light upon a normal bush, causing it to rustle. The party stopped and stared at the bush, with the exception of Trici; she was snoring rather loudly. Aqtile and Cloud shared looks of fear; it couldn’t be Chase because he went in the opposite direction as them, along with Red. So who or what was in the bush just ahead of them?

“Well…attack it!” Cloud whispered hurriedly. Aqtile gave him a look that screamed, ‘ARE YOU CAR-AZY?!’ and replied, “I may be your pokémon, but I’m not stupid! Not to mention, I ain’t lookin’ for an ***-whoopin’!”

“Well then what are we gonna do?!” Cloud rasped in fear. Aqtile shook his head vigorously in response. Cloud stood and thought, never taking his eyes off the bush. He soon found a solution to their bush-dilemma.

“We’ll just sneak past it, and forget we ever saw it!”

“Great idea! Then, when we’re past it, we can run for our lives!”

“Nice! Let’s do it!”

So the duo slowly tip-toed around the bush, careful not to make any sudden movements or noises that might alert the mysterious presence within it. Just as they were almost past it, they heard it sneeze. Scared out of their minds, the bolted screaming, “BUSH MONSTER!”

At the sound of their screams, the bush suddenly jumped three feet in the air. Once it was on the floor again, two heads poked out of the growth. One belonged to a girl, approximately eleven years of age; the other to her poke-companion, an Oater.

The girl’s hair was a light brown, almost hazel, and was severely curly, though extremely beautiful on her; her eyes were soft and luminescent, a bright burgundy; her face was slim, though slightly full at the cheeks; her complexion was a light shade of tan. Her pokémon’s head was covered in an orange fur, which had an odd sheen to it, like it had just left the water; two rounded spikes, one atop the other were located on the back of its head; its eyes were huge and black; its face was elongated and ended in a snout; the bottom half of its face was a creamy beige, its whiskers, black.

The adolescent turned to her companion and posed the question, “Do you think they saw us?”

To which the mammal answered, “Let’s hope not!”

“Good idea! Wait…they’re heading to Barden! Oooo, but that’s where we’re going! What if they challenge us?” she whined. Her Oater slapped her saying, “Are you completely dense?! That’s the whole point of the quest you’re on! To find new trainers and challenge them! Sweet Lugia of the sea, why did I get a trainer like her? WHY?!”

Upset and hurt, she grabbed her pokémon by its tails and walked out of the bush, grumbling, “Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

Her figure was slim and slender, yet slightly muscular. She was at least five feet, maybe five foot two, her hair barely reaching below her shoulders. She wore a black jean jacket, with long sleeves and sides that just passed her still developing breasts. Underneath that she wore a dark green tee, along with a pair of baggy black jeans and finally a pair of high-tech running shoes, complete with black racing stripes and two pairs of little blacks wings on either side of each shoe, along the back.

The pokémon in her hands was all orange, excluding its underbelly and tips of its tails which were beige, and its dorsal fins which were blue and oddly enough, located on the backs of its arms. Just below its face was a circular ring that’s circumference circled its entire neck. This was also beige in color.

They were an odd couple; the girl had only been a trainer for three days now, and had spent the entirety of these days lost within the Verd Forest, mainly due to the fact that she wanted to avoid as many battles as possible. Her Oater didn’t share her feelings, and wanted nothing more than a good fight, though the presence of an actual challenge admittedly scared the both of them, causing them to hide in the aforementioned bush. But since the danger had finally passed, they were ready to continue on to Barden, which was hopefully in the direction they were headed.

Not nearly one foot was out of the bush when her head was jerked back, causing her to wince in pain; her hair was caught in the branches of the bush. Screaming and waving her arms wildly, “AHH! IT HURTS! HELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELP!”

She dropped her companion on its head in all the frenzy, and it took the opportunity to quickly climbed to its feet. Once again on its feet, the Oater merely sighed shaking its head.

“We have one hell of a journey ahead of us.”

“HEY! WHY AREN’T YOU HELPING ME TWIALS?! MY HAIR’S CAUGHT FOR CHRIST’S SAKES!”

She began to cry as she kneeled in despair. ‘Twials’ sighed again, before finally making his way to her tangled ends.

“One hell of a journey,” he repeated.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When they’d finally stopped running, they were already outside of the forest. Hunched over due to multiple cramps and breathing heavily, Cloud looked around curiously making sure no bushes were around. Suddenly his eyes lit with excitement and joy. Aqtile met his gaze and followed it with his fingers, breathing heavily all the while, until he finally rested them upon the little town of Barden just ahead of them.

The shadowed buildings were even welcoming at this hour, the moonlight bouncing off the windows. There wasn’t a single two-story in sight, and all the buildings were sporadically placed with no regard for a financial or residential district; the PokéCenter was placed in the center of the town next to at least two other houses located on either side, the Market located on the outskirts.

Cloud soon spotted an Inn, a quaint little building with a wooden roof and wooden walls; if it hadn’t have been for the sign that read, ‘Barden Inn’ he would’ve guessed it’d been a cabin belonging to a family.

He smiled weakly at the sight, as he all at once remembered his fatigue and shouted at the top of his lungs, “Finally, we’re here…BARDEN TOWN!”

Many lights were seen and heard clicking on in every house, one directly after the other, some simultaneous with one another. Soon the entire town was illuminated by the lights of the houses, exposing Cloud, Trici and Agtile. Shortly after, one thunderous, “QUIET!” was heard echoing in the tiny village, followed by a tiny “Sorry…” and the crying of a baby Pichu.

************************************************** *******************
Finally, Cloud has reached Barden...thought he was going to live in that damned Verd Forest. At least that little detour made life interesting, don't you think? Anyways, in case you all hadn't noticed, an 'Oater' is what I call Buizeru in English. I know, not very creative, but hey...I don't really care ^.^ oh and, discuss Trici's cuteness...for she pwns all xD and now I declare:

Chapter END


Next Time: To Die a Dog's Death

"Mom-my...mommy! MOMMY! Mooooom! Mah-ha-haaaa miee..."

He could feel the tears gushing from his eyes as he bawled. Never had he ever had such an outburst of emotion occur; he was always able to surpress it and hide it away. But now it seems the dam that was his conscience could hold no more, leaving it to crack under the overwhelming pressure known as emotion...and love.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" he screeched in pain, ears bleeding from the banshee-like wail. Nothing changed; he was left still holding his heavy heart, like a punishment he was unable to let go.

"Mommy...where have you gone? ...Are you still here? Where are you? ...Why...why did you leave me mommy?!" he asked the open air, "...Why...? I...I miss you so much Mommy...without you," his voice trailed off, breaking streadily, "...without you, I feel...I feel so lost..."

Left was he to cry, broken and alone beyond his own comprehension...

SEEYA!
[Cano]

BrokenDreams
7th March 2006, 3:17 AM
w00t!!!!! 101th post is mine, baby!! It would have been the 100th, but Cano just had to go and post his chapter. *death glare*

As usual Cano, I love this fic. I spent a while staring at your fic wondering why I posted in it when I never heard of it before. Of course, you went and changed your username and your fic name so .......

DOOM ON YOU!!!!!

For the parts I liked:


]“Take that! And some of this! And one of these! DIE EVIL BUSH MAN, DIE!”
Yes, die evil bushman. DIE!!!!!!! *takes Cloud's stick to hit Chase*


]“Just the Squirtle…just…the…” He said staring down at the pokémon. It looked back up at him and waved. He trembled slightly and felt his eye twitch. He then raised his hand as if he was still in school.

“Uh…what’s the matter?” asked his father.

“The pokémon’s talking to me,” he said in a dull voice.

“Well…yeah. We all know that. Now what you should be afraid of, is if you can understand it,” Chase said reassuringly. Once again, Cloud raised his hand.

“Yeah?”

“I can understand it…”

“...really? Hmm…well Red, what do you make of it?”

“In my professional opinion? I think your kid’s a mental case, just like his old man.”

“Yeah that’s what I was thinking too.”

“…”

“What?” asked Chase.

“No smart remark? No snappy comeback? Not even an angry ‘Hey!’?” answered Red.

“No, I’m pretty much a psycho.”

Yes, I agree with Chase


]“Hey, what do you mean ‘little?!’” he growled angrily, a familiar tic-tac-toe of veins present on his bald head.

“I mean you’re short.”

“Well, you’re not exactly a skyscraper y’know,” was the Squirtle’s retort.

Meanwhile, Chase and Red merely stood by watching the nine-year-old argue with the pokémon like it was his imaginary friend; with looks of stupidity and wonder. Red turned and asked Chase if he could understand anything they were saying, to which Chase replied, “What’re you nuts?”
Yes. Yes you are, Red.


]Red’s face was already aglow, his eyes glazed over from the mere thought of the infinite amount of insults he could cook up…until Chase’s words struck him, a very large mallet entitled, ‘DENIED!’ Once struck by the mallet, Red’s head jerked forward, his eyes almost leaving their sockets. He then hung his head in shame, upset that he let his opportunity slip. The air around him seemed to turn white as long dark lines becoming visible around his head. His Pikachu was no longer on his shoulder; it had instead, leapt to the ground nearest him, a look of pure enjoyment on his face. As he rubbed his little paws together, his face became nothing more than a toothy grin. Finally he leapt into the air, pointed at his trainer and shouted, “PI-KA!”

Red instantly came back to life, shouting even louder than Pikachu, “I was not ‘owned!’”

The Pikachu ignored his partner’s outburst and went on hopping happily, pointing and laughing, screaming the same phrase over and over again in a sing-song voice. Red’s head was steaming, the vapors clearly visible as they rose from his head. The only one more annoyed than Red was Chase; their little argument interrupted his chat with his son.

“Hey, losers,” he shouted over the noise from Red’s Pikachu.

“Huh?” came their simultaneous remarks. Before he had even uttered a word, Red’s face was scarlet with embarrassment.

Great, here it comes, he said readying himself.

A devious smile crept across Chase’s face, a smile of pure and utter satisfaction. He stood there smiling for a while, soaking up the feeling of opportunity, cherishing the very moment as if it were his last day on Earth. Then he spoke, “Oh man, where to go with this one. Okay first off, the fact that you both respond to ‘loser’ is hilarious. Actually, I’m not as surprised that you responded,” he went on, directing his first comment to Red, “but I had expected more of a challenge from the rodent.
I want that mallet! Give it to me! I want to hit him!! Why? For fun. Duh.


]“Evolutionary stage? What’s that mean?”

“Ok, that…well…y’see…evolution…it’s like…hm…it’s like…a long, difficult process. Kinda like growth…I think. I’m not too sure how to explain it really; it’s actually kinda complicated.”

“For you maybe!” said Red, finally recovering from his daze. He climbed to his feet and made his way toward Chase. He stood next to his rival and began to speak, “Let me explain: evolution is most definitely a long and difficult process. Basically like growth-“

“Hey, I said that!”

“-but with a twist. You see, when humans grow, their outer appearance rarely changes. Beyond boys growing beards, and girls growing-“

“BRAINS!” Chase quickly interjected; he had suddenly become very sweaty, “G-girls grow brains, son! A-he-he-he, ugh.”

“-riiight…brains.
Yes. That's why I am a mathematical prodigy. Fear my easily confused mind!! *refers to sig*

[Cano]
7th March 2006, 4:54 AM
w00t!!!!! 101th post is mine, baby!! It would have been the 100th, but Cano just had to go and post his chapter. *death glare*

<< hey, don't look at me! ...wait...xP

As usual Cano, I love this fic. I spent a while staring at your fic wondering why I posted in it when I never heard of it before. Of course, you went and changed your username and your fic name so .......

Yeah...I did, didn't I?

DOOM ON YOU!!!!!

xP

For the parts I liked:


Yes, die evil bushman. DIE!!!!!!! *takes Cloud's stick to hit Chase*

But everybody loves Chase! Or at least I do...did you ever stop to think...why was he hiding? x.O

Yes, I agree with Chase

Takes a true man to admit he's psycho...too bad I'll never admit it openly in court.

Yes. Yes you are, Red.

'Course he's nuts! He's friend with Chase.

I want that mallet! Give it to me! I want to hit him!! Why? For fun. Duh.

Wow...you don't like any of my characters, do you? xD HATER!!! xP

Yes. That's why I am a mathematical prodigy. Fear my easily confused mind!! *refers to sig*

So...brains huh? Yeah...brains...xD

Well I'm glad you liked it. BTW, did you read the recent chapter? I didn't post it just to beat you to 100th post ;D
[Cano]

Valkyrie X
7th March 2006, 5:00 AM
Wow...I must say, this chapter was certainly an excellent one; as good as your last one, even. You really did a great job writing this one; the flow is wonderful, as usual, and the general aspects of it are just well-written overall.

The description was amazing in this chapter. You described everything perfectly, including the Pokémon, the surroundings, the thoughts and feelings of the characters, and just all the little things. This chapter has a great deal of excellent description, possibly more so than your previous chapters, even. I can see that you really worked hard to elaborate on everything fluently. Nice work.

The grammar and spelling were perfect. Meaning, I could not spot a single typo. :o I see you took the time to proofread this chapter carefully...This is definitely a good step for you. Bravo.

The length, as usual, was great. Like all the previous chapters, it's got the traits of a nice steak, and that, as you know, is a good thing. =P Well done on length, like always.

You have once again enlightened me with the humor in this chapter.

It made sense to him now, for Cloud could remember his odd fascination with the smell of animal **** moments earlier.
This made me laugh so hard for some reason. :p Also, the part with the Barden Town brochure was absolutely hilarious. I must admit, you really have a knack for putting humor into your work, especially since this is a fic with a rather dark atmosphere in general. And I applaud you on that.

Overall, this chapter was extremely well-written, but that's nothing new. Everything was just excellent; I couldn't even find any typos, for Pete's sake. o_O You've really outdone yourself on this one...Very nice work, [Cano]. Keep up the spectacular writing. I'll wait for the next chapter.

;381;ZR;380;

Felix Feral Fezirix
7th March 2006, 11:04 AM
....The female trainer should be blonde. xP joking.

Cloud now needs sword. I mean, no sword, no defense. Graagh. Never mind.

The hatching part was probably the best part in the chapter. Now that's elite description.

I can feel very big conflict beginning.......

Girl: Ahhhhhh! It's you!
Twails: Awright! Let's do it!
Girl: Nonononono!
Cloud: Yesyesyesyesyes!
Agtile/Aqtile: Nooooooooooooz!

xP. So funny.

Anyway, is it Agtile or Aqtile? I can't tell. Gah.

[Cano]
8th March 2006, 12:33 AM
Wow...I must say, this chapter was certainly an excellent one; as good as your last one, even. You really did a great job writing this one; the flow is wonderful, as usual, and the general aspects of it are just well-written in general.

Why thank you. I worked even harder than ever before on this one. I got the determination after reading the latest chapter from [xXSaberXx]'s fic, Pokemon Revelations: Cross of Fates. After reading that, I got the sudden urge to describe more elaborately and fully.

The description was amazing in this chapter. You described everything perfectly, including the Pokémon, the surroundings, the thoughts and feelings of the characters, and just all the little things. This chapter has a great deal of excellent description, possibly more so than your previous chapters, even. I can see that you really worked hard to elaborate on everything fluently. Nice work.

Yeah, that's all thanks to [xXSaberXx] and her fic. I'm glad I read it and realized how elaborate I can get. Obviously, it helped a lot :D

The grammar and spelling were perfect. Meaning, I could not spot a single typo. :o I see you took the time to proofread this chapter carefully...This is definitely a good step for you. Bravo.

Perfect huh? Wow, thanks! Yes, definitely a good step! And it took me nearly forever to proofread the entire chapter! xD

The length, as usual, was great. Like all the previous chapters, it's got the traits of a nice steak, and that, as you know, is a good thing. =P Well done on length, like always.

Steaks again? Awesome! I lurve steaks! However...how would you feel if I were to...stray from the steak mentality with the next chapter?

You have once again enlightened me with the humor in this chapter.

This made me laugh so hard for some reason. :p Also, the part with the Barden Town brochure was absolutely hilarious. I must admit, you really have a knack for putting humor into your work, especially since this is a fic with a rather dark atmosphere in general. And I applaud you on that.

Thankies :} and I always wanted to a comedy thing like the Barden brochure. Finally I got to do it! But...I think I'm going to stray from comedy for a while...if the next chapter's title wasn't a clue...:( sorry.

Overall, this chapter was extremely well-written, but that's nothing new. Everything was just excellent; I couldn't even find any typos, for Pete's sake. o_O You've really outdone yourself on this one...Very nice work, [Cano]. Keep up the spectacular writing. I'll wait for the next chapter.

Thank you very much. And I will keep it up, 'cuz I can only get better from here! Next chapter won't be done for a while, seeing as I just posted 3 chapters in less than 2 weeks >.< so I think you all deserve a well needed break...that and I think'll it'll be the longest chapter ever. But you didn't hear that from me.

;381;ZR;380;


....The female trainer should be blonde. xP joking.

xD I hope so! She's not that ditzy! xDDDDDDDDDDD and ditzy isn't even the word I would use to describe her...she's just a kid y'know? Not to mention she just spent 3 days in an uber dark forest xD

Cloud now needs sword. I mean, no sword, no defense. Graagh. Never mind.

A...sword? @.@ are you talking about...no you can't be...can you? *buttons lip*

The hatching part was probably the best part in the chapter. Now that's elite description.

I guess it is. Thank you [Pikachuism]!

I can feel very big conflict beginning.......

Whatddya mean? <<;;;;

Girl: Ahhhhhh! It's you!
Twails: Awright! Let's do it!
Girl: Nonononono!
Cloud: Yesyesyesyesyes!
Agtile/Aqtile: Nooooooooooooz!

xO

xP. So funny.

[no comment]

Anyway, is it Agtile or Aqtile? I can't tell. Gah.

Aqtile: comprised of the words 'Aqua' and 'Reptile.'
Yes, very retarded I know xP but I like it.


Well that's everything! Seeya when Chapter 9 is ready! xD
[Cano]

UmbreonMaster
8th March 2006, 5:46 AM
Nice job. I'm sorry this is not gonna be a long review I am running late! ^^;; Anyways it was good! Nice job keep it up!!!!

~UM~ *runs to car*

LightAbsol
28th May 2006, 8:07 PM
Your fanfic is really cool. I'm interested to see where it gose. Keep it up.


Growing old is inevitable
Growing up is optional