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Breezy
1st September 2005, 5:50 AM
Muddy & Flare

Summary: Two Pokémon, one of idiocy and the other of sarcasm ... y join together to answer questions from the audience. And, er, other things. >>

Rated: PG (PG-13 later on for language)


Story Guide (story updated as of 23/5/06):

Show Two (http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?p=3298317#post3298317)

Screw it, I'm reposting Muddy & Flare, the ownage of all talk shows. XP

Just kidding! I'm sure the others pwn this one. But it's okay. Because-

Muddy: I just plain rock.

...Yeah.

Muddy: Hoy!

>>; Anyhoo, the dialouge remains the same, along with the concept, but, of course, in order for this to be here, we have to make it, dare I say, script like.

Muddy: The horror.

Flare: You don't even know how to write-

Shh! They don't need to know that! Enjoy. The first chapter sucks because, er, there are no questions to start it off. Ja.


------------------------------------

::The audience is empty as two lone Pokémon are comfortably seated in two plushy red loveseats, their toes snugglings in between the shaggy, white carpet. The lights blazed hotly above their heads in a warm, golden glow as a sleepy looking Swampert, scratching his light blue head before fiddling with his orange whiskers, wondering what to talk about::

Muddy: ::looks at the camera where a bored Machoke looks through and grins:: Sometimes I wonder at night how my life would be if I wasn't stupid and . . . some other big word like that. Wow . . . life would be that dull? Gasp gasp there buddy . . . haha! Ah, but anyways, I'm-

::The other Pokémon sitting next in the other loveseat pipes in, raising her arms, clicking her talons. She preens down the fiery blaze of orange, red, and tan feathers and directs her sharp, amber eyes toward the Swampert, who's own orange eyes were cast toward the empty audience.

Flare: Stupid? ::ruffles her feathers and smiles innocently at the bored-looking Machoke behind the camera::

Muddy: No, Flare. I'm-

Flare: An idiot?

Muddy: No! I'm-

Flare: Latios?

Muddy: No- well, yeah I am haha, but I'm Muddy!

Flare: Wow, I certainly did not know that at all Muddy! Wow.

Muddy: Well, you sure are stupid then Flare, our name is the title of this story after all! ::looks at her as if it were obvious::

Flare: ::obviously knows that it is the title of the story:: Whatever. Anyhoo, we're two oh so very interesting Po-

Muddy: Don't lie to the viewers at home Flare.

Flare: I was being sarcastic you dolt!

Mudy: Geez, sorry. ::looks sadden, but then perks up:: What does sar . . . sarcas . . . s-a-r-c-a-s-t-i-c mean?

Flare: ::rolls eyes and looks straight into the camera:: Do you see what I have to put up with everyday folks?

Muddy: Ah! Is it on me? ::looks around frantically, swatting the air, ending up toppling over in his chair. The camera zooms in on him::

Flare: You're an idiot Muddy.

Muddy: Why bless ya Flare!

::The camera zooms back out as Muddy picks up his chair and sits back down in it. The air was filled with silence. And then, the blue mudfish speaks.::

Muddy: Anyways, I shall explain my life story. I was raised near the country side, born in a milk carton and swam in a puddle of pudding to get Littleroot where rabid Zigazagoons raised me as one of their kin, and then a guy with an alive bunny on his face capture me, and I was sold to Santa Clause and his little elf in red and white wearing a weird shaped hat on his heads. Soon I-

Flare: ::raises an eyebrow:: You were not raised by rabid Zigazagoons.

Muddy: How would you know?

Flare: . . . Good point . . .

Muddy: Haha, I win! As I was saying, I was taken in by the great Zamborginie-

Flare: I thought you said Santa Clause and his little elf in red and white wearing a weird shaped hat on his head. Wait, are you referring to Brendan and May? May is not an elf! Brendan on the other hand-

Muddy: -The GREAT Zamborginie said, "If you wish hard enough, anything can come true or you end up relieving yourself instead!"-

Flare: Well that's a load of BS. Who says stuff like-

Muddy: -So I flew to Channy Isle with the wings that sprouted from my feet. There I fed the hungry Pokémon of . . . um... Tawny . . . yoko. Yeah! Tawnyoko! Seeing those hungry Pokémon . . . it just breaks my heart-

Flare: Muddy?

Muddy: -and you know, you can't have your heart break 'cause, you know, you'll . . . die dude. DIE!

Flare: Don't tell me to die!

Muddy: . . .Fine. Anyway, the great tide of the blue shoe took me away to Hoenn once again where I met this very ugly-looking chicken-

Flare: HEY!

Muddy: And she was all, "Get away from me you ugly blue thing!" So I cried, and the chicken got in trouble.

Flare: Must you tell everyone that story?

Muddy: Of course! It's the only time you got in trouble!

Flare: ::rolls eyes and laces claws:: Moving on . . . How's life going for you guys? Good? Good.

Muddy: My life is . . . stupid! And who are you talking to? No one's here!

::Muddy points to the empty seats that should be filled with audience. Flare chooses to ignore this statement though and retaliates back towards the Swampert::

Flare: Like someone I know in this room.

Muddy: Hey, don't talk about the readers in front of their face!

Flare: Not them! You, imbecile!

Machoke: That's it, I quit!

::The Machoke throws down the wires for the camera to the ground and storms out of the set, flinging open the doors and slamming them shut behind him, leaving behind two startled hosts, the camera focusing on the shaggy red carpet. Muddy gets up from his seat and focuses the camera back on the two right after making funny faces toward the viewers at home. Then he turns around and glares at Flare::

Muddy: Look what you did! You made Imbecile leave!

Flare: If you ever name your Pokémon that . . .

Muddy: It's a compliment in the Machoke lingo. It means face full of shining glory. But Imbecile in my language means face full of cheese. Isn't that, like, funny?

Flare: I'm sure it does. Now what were we talking about? Ah yes, you're the one that's stupid.

Muddy: You're stupid?

Flare: . . . Yes Muddy. I'm stupid.

Muddy: Haha, you're stupid!

Flare: If each story had to have a certain about of brain cells in order for it to be posted, well I dare say that this story would be taken down faster than you can run from an angry mob of girl water Pokémon

Muddy: Shut up! You know they were all over me!

Flare: Yeah, they were trying to beat you up!

::Muddy continually glares at the smirking Blaziken but decides to ignore it by staring at the unmoving camera::

Muddy: It's tough being a Swampert especially with a chicken . . . a fire type chicken. Hmm . . . I wonder Flare . . . If you used your Flamethrower on yourself, would you eat yourself? Is it like having handy dandy food wherever you go?

::Flare looks Muddy's way dully and wearily.::

Flare: I have a question for you? When did you get stupid?

Muddy: Since August 29th, 2003!

Flare: The day you were born huh?

Muddy: Yup, though I didn't show it.

Flare: Sorta anyways.

Muddy: Yeah. Um, anyways . . .

::Muddy looks around frantically again in search and hope of something interesting to pop up, or better yet, another Pokémon to talk to so the show won't end quickly. Luckily, the doors fling open again, and in enters at four-legged hyena with ruffled black and gray fur and red eyes and a Delcatty, who, interestingly enough was preening her dark-brown fur with her soft tongue but still talking clearly enough. Muddy claps excitely as the two Pokémon walk onto the set and sit down on the dark blue couch in between the two loveseats.::

Muddy: Ah, look! It's Skittles and Sirius, are co-hosts Flare!

Flare: I'd clap, but I don't feel like it.

::Skittles, the Delcatty, looks slightly flustered at Muddy's comment and glares at him. Muddy, densely enough, smiles back as if it were a kindly gesture.::

Skittles: We're not co-hosts are we Sirius? ::looks helplessly are the Mightyena next to her to help but he only licks his teeth and pants.::

Sirius: I dunno . . . Are we Skittles?

Muddy: Yes you are! You don't have a story named after ya know do you?

Skittles: Shut up, we're working on it!

Sirius: Yeah, its going to be called "Sirius & Skittles!" BAM! In your face Mud boy!

Skittles: Damn straight!

::Flare, who is lazily staring at the golden lights from up above, snaps her head back down and decided to change the subject.::

Flare: Whatever guys . . . Moving onto the next topic on our list-

Skittles: Hey! We're not done here!

Flare: Well, this is my and Muddy's show, so get your faces out of it!

Muddy: BAM!

Flare: Now, as I was trying to say before I was rudely interrupted-

Muddy: Geez, I know! That cat and dog can be so retarded and impolite sometimes I can't believe it! They talk so much! Yada, yada yada, I mean c'mon! We don't wanna hear you, so Shut. Up.

Flare: I believe someone should take their own advice.

Muddy: Me? Nah. It couldn't be . . . could it?

Flare: Whatever. Moving on AGAIN, what's the deal with Pokémon Centers? Why are all the nurses the same? There not all like that are they?

Muddy: Maybe they got plastic surgery. And I don't believe that they're ALL the same! Brock, the guy on that retarded show, Pokémon-

Flare: Hello Muddy? You're a Pokémon too remember?

Muddy: Yeah, and proud of it, but what does it have to do with that dumb Pokémon show?

Flare: ::sighs:: Never mind.

Muddy: As I was saying, Brock knew that one Nurse Joy's bangs were like a millimeter or something longer than the others! So in your face Flare!

Flare: Oh dear, it hurts. Ow. Stop the hate.

Muddy: Just because you have a nut in your butt, doesn't mean it has to affect the strain in your brain!

Flare: I believe its already too late for you already.

Muddy: Is not! The strain in my brain never hurts!

Flare: That's because you have no brain Mud boy.

Muddy: I do too!

Flare: Yeah right. If there was a stupid city, you'd be the leader of them.

Muddy: You want stupid! I'll show you stupid!

::Muddy quickly jumps out of his seat and puts his fists up. He starts to shift his weight back and forth between his feet and takes a swing at the air, missing his invisble target and hitting himself in the face instead. He coils and falls to the ground, clutching his eye.::

Muddy: MY EYE! It's on fire!

Flare: ::watches Muddy climb back into his seat, amused.:: Somehow, I'm pretty sure you can too.

Muddy: Haha, I can, can't I?

Flare: Well I ran out of things to say considering I was just hired for this dumb talk host job thing.

Muddy: We're being talk show hosts now! I thought we were being ourselves.

Flare: Yeah we are. we're just talking about it in a story.

Muddy: Oh no! I got my character all wrong! Oh no, oh no!

Flare: Oogle flooga!

Muddy: What? Oh, who are you guys! I'm Latios! Rawr!

Flare: I just love the simple minded. I'm Flare!

Muddy: And I'm-

Flare: Stupid, inconsiderate, moronic, a jerk, retarded-

Muddy: Wow, I'm all those things! I thought I was Muddy!

Flare: Please pray for me.

::The lights dim and the four Pokémon get up out of their seats and toward the doors, opening them and letting them close behind them with a satisfying slam.::


------------------------------------

Flare: That's not script format, you-

Sh! ^^; LaTeR dAyZ!

Naesala
1st September 2005, 7:50 PM
great chapter!wow i can't belive i'm the first to review!it's really funny!i hope you get the next chapter up soon!

Flaming Lip
1st September 2005, 8:08 PM
I don't know... some of that humor seemed forced...

0-0

Or maybe its just a lot of those simular talk show fics that make me dislike (Most of those be bad... *nod*)

Still, Flare reaps pwnage on my mortal soul.

That made no sense, but... neither does this fic so....

4 stars! Ja?

^^

Wondrous Sableye
1st September 2005, 8:27 PM
Glad to see the fun-ness reposted, Breezeh. And NiGHTS, this used to be the only talk show fic before PokéTalk and that other one. I think. Yeah, Muddy and Flare's been around awhile.

Like the new bit with 'Imbecile', Breezy, that was a nice added touch. Hope you post the next chapter soon.

Flaming Lip
1st September 2005, 11:42 PM
Glad to see the fun-ness reposted, Breezeh. And NiGHTS, this used to be the only talk show fic before PokéTalk and that other one. I think. Yeah, Muddy and Flare's been around awhile.

Like the new bit with 'Imbecile', Breezy, that was a nice added touch. Hope you post the next chapter soon.

I know that, its just, the others seemed to have ruined the experiance for me :P

[Cano]
2nd September 2005, 12:05 AM
Wow, that was funny! I'm glad you decided to repost it, otherwise I woulda missed out on its unmatched greatness!! That was great, I loved it. Muddy doesn't know how to ask questions. And since when was he a Latios? Yeah, he's 'beyond-words' stupid. Flare!! :)
<SCM>

Seijiro Mafuné
2nd September 2005, 2:27 AM
Heh. Can we do as before and ask questions? If so, anyways, I want to ask Muddy if he can tell us about Ice Cream the Ho-Oh!

P.S.: About yer sig? No. Way.

jirachiman876
2nd September 2005, 4:06 AM
It's mlargh breezeh mlargh!!!!!! get it right!!! Well funny. I have never read a lot of muddy and flare and wow am i surprised. This is hilariously funny. Well,
jirachiman out ;385;

Breezy
2nd September 2005, 5:46 AM
great chapter!wow i can't belive i'm the first to review!it's really funny!i hope you get the next chapter up soon!Ty. ^^

I don't know... some of that humor seemed forced...

0-0

Or maybe its just a lot of those simular talk show fics that make me dislike (Most of those be bad... *nod*)

Still, Flare reaps pwnage on my mortal soul.

That made no sense, but... neither does this fic so....

4 stars! Ja?

^^Prolly cuz some of the jokes were made way back when. o.o And most likely, I did force jokes. Right on. Ty for the review though "FL." :P

Glad to see the fun-ness reposted, Breezeh. And NiGHTS, this used to be the only talk show fic before PokéTalk and that other one. I think. Yeah, Muddy and Flare's been around awhile.

Like the new bit with 'Imbecile', Breezy, that was a nice added touch. Hope you post the next chapter soon.Muddy & Flare has been around for quite awhile at ff.net. It made a debut here once but then got deleted in some prune or whatever. Thanks for the review WS.

Wow, that was funny! I'm glad you decided to repost it, otherwise I woulda missed out on its unmatched greatness!! That was great, I loved it. Muddy doesn't know how to ask questions. And since when was he a Latios? Yeah, he's 'beyond-words' stupid. Flare!!
<SCM>The Muddy pretending to be Latios thing was an old inside joke with one of my old reviewers at ff.net. We use to roleplay with our characters a lot and I made Muddy pretend to be Latios to put in in short terms. Thanks for the review SCM!

Heh. Can we do as before and ask questions? If so, anyways, I want to ask Muddy if he can tell us about Ice Cream the Ho-Oh!

P.S.: About yer sig? No. Way.Well, as you already know, there are ten chapters after this one so the questions asked here won't be appearing til chapter eleven. ^^; But if you guys want to submit questions like the ones at ff.net, go for it. Maybe I'll put 'em in with chapter two... oooh...

P.S. You so are video. ;o; You know you like it. ;)

It's mlargh breezeh mlargh!!!!!! get it right!!! Well funny. I have never read a lot of muddy and flare and wow am i surprised. This is hilariously funny.I know. I typed it like that to intentionally piss you off. :D Thanks for reading.

LaTeR dAyZ! to all you closet readers! =3

Lupin
3rd September 2005, 7:23 PM
Well Breezy you 've done it again. Another classic fic with two of the funniest pokemon in exitence. And a talk show that seems rather like "Frank and Skinner Unplanned" :).

Seijiro Mafuné
4th September 2005, 5:38 AM
Breezy, you sure the weather ain't low where you are? Because that might contribute to your mental shtuff.

P.S.: No I don't.

Joe Vega #4
11th September 2005, 9:05 PM
I rated this five stars! I read this back at www.fanfiction.net, and I was deeply saddened when I heard somebody had blabbed to the site about your rule-breaking fic(down with the nobody who did that!!!), and then I thought, 'What if she decides to put it here?' I became overjoyed and waited until you finally posted it. Wheee! Great fic!

P.S. I don't remember any Machoke in there, did you steal that from Typlogirl?! Cuz if you did.....(whips out atomic bomb and puts it in studio, then flees on a helicopter.)

Breezy
11th September 2005, 9:45 PM
P.S. I don't remember any Machoke in there, did you steal that from Typlogirl?! Cuz if you did.....(whips out atomic bomb and puts it in studio, then flees on a helicopter.)No. I don't even read Typhlogirl's fics. It was just to add to the description in order for this fic to be "script-like." At least a hybrid version of one.

And no the weather ain't low here Sejiro. :P

Kaizer
11th September 2005, 10:02 PM
0_o

Muddy: Ah, look! It's Skittles and Sirius, are co-hosts Flare!

I found a mistake, I think...
Normally are should be our, but with the character you have there...

So umm, yeah. This is great, but not this review. I'll just reply again later.
*exit crappy review*
;245;

Seijiro Mafuné
12th September 2005, 2:16 AM
Seijiro, not Sejiro.

P.S.: I am not....

X-Cel
18th September 2005, 7:07 PM
=/


I can't think of anything to say. The humor was good and the characters acted the way they were expected to. Oh, and a bonus point for Sirius and Skittles taking part of the show. =3

;196; And since everyone here has their own "pet pokemon," here's my female Espeon. =3 She's such a cutie. ^.^

Togepicute
23rd September 2005, 11:53 PM
Breezy I've got a question for Mud boy! I have read at FF.net so you'll know what I'm talking about....
Question:

What's the longest word you have ever said? No I won't accept Jetpacksuperdudewiththepowerofwater.

This one for Flare:
How can you stand idiots? I need some tips.

Ok this one for Sirius:
When are you confesseing to Skittles? You are so obviuos!

Seijiro Mafuné
24th September 2005, 12:25 AM
She'll answer those anyway, man. She stated so already.

Togepicute
24th September 2005, 1:09 AM
What do you mean? 0.o
I know she'll answer them! That's why I'm asking!

Oh, yeah...by the way I'm CuTe ToGePi ... yep the one who reviewed your fics at FF.net at the same time

Seijiro Mafuné
24th September 2005, 1:21 AM
She'll repeat all the chapters before starting to answer OUR questions.

Togepicute
24th September 2005, 2:58 AM
I now that...and actually I don't mind it...

Khanom_Ana
7th October 2005, 12:10 AM
Haha, that was soooooo funny!

Sakura Haruno
13th October 2005, 12:50 AM
lol breezy good job it was hilariously funny keep it up ur stories are good


keep writing i want to read more ......lol sorry no pressure >>> i am very weird

Scizor King
4th November 2005, 1:46 AM
Breezy, you've outdone yourself. I should know; I've been reading your fics even before I joined. No it's not 30 days since last post. It's 21 or something.

hikari_blaze
4th November 2005, 9:11 PM
HAHAHA!!! I love this fic! Keep it up Breezy!

Breezy
24th May 2006, 5:48 AM
I had this. But never posted it. ._. I deleted a whole bunch of things from the original version that I thought was stupid. So here. Mind you it sucks now. And I hate it now. It get funnier later. But bear with it. ;-;




------------------------------------

(A few Pokémon are scattered throughout the entire audience. It was still incredibly empty though as the lights start to flash different colors, testing them before the actual show started. The sound of broken glass rebounded throughout the room as a microwave collided with a light.)

Muddy: Oh, what now sucker. I told you I could heave a microwave toward the ceiling.

Sirius: (rolls eyes) Whatever.

Flare: (looks at the script) I think that's a typo. I think the writer meant microphone . . .

Muddy: Ah, that I'm sure I could heave.

(A loud, heaving cough-)

Flare: Lack of vocab Breezeh? You've used heaving as least three times in
five lines.

(...Suddenly, the lights dim on the smirking, overconfident, overgrown chicken who should shut up if she knows what's good for her.)

Imbecile: (grudingly back and directing the camera) Alrighty, in three, two-

Flare: Excuse me but my lights aren't on. And I refuse to work if I don't have the lights on me.

Muddy: Silly Flare. You like your eggos don't you.

Flare: What? I think you mean egos. And even then, that still doesn't make sense.

Muddy: Op! Too late to argue, we're on. My name is Muddy and I shall be your waiter this evening.

Flare: (sighs and sits in the light next to Muddy on the red sofa) That's not funny.

Muddy: Yeah okay. Right. Where are we again? Sometimes I get this note to come here and sometimes there's a trail of candy coming here and then it stops and then I forget what I was going to do and . . . hmm. I be Muddy and let me say I can heave microwaves over your head.

Flare: Welcome to the show. All four of you.

(The four Pokémon in the show start to clap frantically, though it still sounded pathetic in the large building. Flare, rolling her eyes, nodded at Imbecile, who, in return, rolled back in his chair and started to fiddle around with the computer, trying to turn on the automated clapping noise . . . thing. You know, when that AUDIENCE sign flashes on in studios? That thing.)

Flare: Description isn't suppose to talk.

(Says the chicken who looks even more stupider than Muddy because she's talking to herself since no one can hear supposed description. Your face can't talk Flare. Your face!)

Flare: (rolls her eyes again and picks up a card) An e-mailer asks, "What-"

Muddy: "Should I eat for dinner? Catfish, chicken or cheese?"

Flare: What the . . . how did you do that?

Muddy: Do what?

Flare: Read my card without looking at it.

Muddy: Silly Flare, I can't read.

Flare: Well, that makes the answer to my question even more curious then.

Muddy: What question?

Flare: How did you read my card if you don't know how to read?

Muddy: I didn't read it. I skimmed it.

Flare: What's the difference?

Muddy: Reading is for sissies. Anyways, since I have no clue what any of those things are, I think catfish is good. It tastes weird in the beginning, but hey, it's food! A hobo would gladly give his left shoe for your left foot. That way he can sell it on the market and get a right shoe to match the left shoe he sold to you.

Flare: (shakes head) Muddy, you're a catfish.

Muddy: Your face is a catfish.

Flare: Yeah okay, what's with the face jokes? They get OLD.

Muddy: . . .Haha I get it now. Catfish, chicken, cheese . . . I'm a catfish, you're a chicken, and Bob . . . Oh Bob my love.

Flare: Bob is a piece cheese. Bob can't breathe. Bob can't be your lover.

Muddy: Hiss. Jealous. Or as my comrades in spanish say jealous...o.

Flare: It's celoso. Don't be stereotypical with the spanish language.

Muddy: Flare-o is-o lame-o.

Flare: Whatever. Next question. Another reviewer asks, "What color should I dye my hair?" Hm . . . What a good question.

Muddy: What? No it's not Flare! That's just some question that you ask when you don't have questions!

Flare: I was being sarcastic.

Muddy: I still don't know what the heck that means.

Flare: Go skim a dictionary and figure it out. You should dye your hair-

Muddy: (angry) I wasn't through talking here you know!

Flare: Who cares? Anyways, you should die your hair red.

Muddy: Red? No, blue of course! It's brighter and it'll match the sky!

Flare: Red! It's cooler looking!

Muddy: Whatever you say Flare. Next question!

Flare: What's this? Nothing witty to retaliate back.

Muddy: Go to hell my love.

Flare: Ouch.

Muddy: (grins) Anyways! "Should I choose a Treeko, Mudkip, or Torchic in Sapphire?" That's so cliché. Choose a walnut as your starter. That'd be kick-arse. Walnut would all hop out into battle, fire burning in his tiny, yet hopeful, eyes, and the crowds will cheer him on, screaming his name. You know what attack he would use Flare?

Flare: Walnuts can't move by themselves.

Muddy: Duh! That's why he's going to use that one move where you can't move! What's it called?

Flare: Get pummeled on until you die?

Muddy: Yeah, I have that attack. It's pwnage or however you say that.

Flare: (snorts) I'm sure that's one of your more powerful moves. Next question.

Muddy: I want to read one!

Flare: Reading is for sissies.

Muddy: You know Flare. It's people like you that are corrupting the future. Saying that reading is for sissies . . . For shame. What will that say to the widdle kiddies?

Flare: . . . Just read.

Muddy: Okay! Adervice . . . advice! Ok, next word . . . my . . . ferend . . . Friend! Thinks th-hat Com . . . Com . . . com . . .

Flare: Combuskens.

Muddy: Hey! First you say reading is for sissies and now you're trying to steal my fire! Bad influence on the children, Latios! Anyways, Combusken are bay tter . . . better! But my ot . . . other ferend . . . friend thun? Thinks! That Marshtomps - hey I was one of those - are bay tter. Wat . . . what . . . should I cho-choo-choo . . . huh?

Flare: Oh God, just skim it for crying out loud.

Muddy: Fine! Punk. "Dear Muddy, I need advice. My friend thinks that Combuskens are better. But my other friend thinks that Marshtomps are better. What should I choo-choo-choo-choose?"

Flare: What's the train effect needed?

Muddy: Yes. Dude, why does this guy always ask who's better? He must lack self confidentiatlity in himself.

Flare: Confidence.

Muddy: Yeah well. Put that on top of your eggos. Chose Marshtomp. Because they own.

Flare: Everything except Combuskens that is. Combusken.

Muddy: What's this? Oh no, want to dance amigo?

Flare: ˇBailemos!

Muddy: ...What?

Flare: That means let's dance in spanish.

Muddy: You mean it's not dance-o? Haha look! It says emos in it. Flare's an emo!

Flare: (closes eyes, hesistant to respond, thinking, before opening her eyes again) I should just slap you right now. Whatever.

Muddy: I win! You're a loser! Don't cry now emo!

Flare: Goodness. . . Next question. "How-"

Muddy: (interrupts) "-Do I get my sister out of a tree?" Wait, I don't have a sister! Next question!

Flare: Not you, moron! Him!

Muddy: Him doesn't have a sister. And be glad that Moron is up there working the lights otherwise he might throw a hissy fit and walk off the set too.

Flare: I meant the e-mailer's sister dimwit. And the guy working the lights is named Morgan, not moron.

Muddy: Okay first of all, Imbecile is working the camera. Moron, or "Morgan" as you like to call him, is the Volbeat working the lights. And Dimwit, the Dratini, is backstage working on props. My name is Muddy. Get us straight already!

Flare: I think you hired these Pokémon just so I can't insult you in public. Fine. If your sister got herself stuck up there in the first place, then I'm pretty sure she can get herself down, next!

Muddy: "Should there be a water and fire Pokémon?"

Flare: That's not virtually possible . . .

Muddy: But there is a water and fire type Pokémon! There's Vulpix's for fire, Tentacools for water, plus way, way more!

Flare: He meant as in a combined water and fire Pokémon. Read better.

Muddy: (gasps) Reading is for sissies.

Flare: And how come you can say that and not corrupt the children?

Muddy: Because who takes me seriously?

Flare: (pauses) That's true . . .

Muddy: Snapadoozles. (picks up a card, grins, and rubs it in Flare's face) Look at this homeslice! Look at it!

Flare: (grabs card out of Muddy's hand forcefully and stares at the card) There's nothing on it.

Muddy: (holding another card) I know! I just needed to distract you so I could get a card.

Flare: But you got that card without any problems. So why couldn't you just get the actual card instead?

Muddy: Because it doesn't work that way.

Flare: Why not may I ask?

Muddy: It just doesn't.

Flare: Yeah. Right. Go on. "Skim."

Muddy: Will do cap'n! "Dear Muddy. If Suicune is going 140 miles per hour and Latias is going 139.9 miles per hour, who's Sirius's best friend?" Hm . . . let's see now . . . If Suicune is going 140 miles per hour and Latias is going 139.9 miles per hour . . .(scratches his head, and starts to write invisble numbers in front of him) Carry the eight . . . Sirius's best friend is 904,690!

Flare: (bewildered) Muddy did the math . . .

Muddy: Am I right? (smiles)

Sirius: My best friend is a math problem?

Muddy: That's what it says!

Flare: Wait . . . (thinks back to the beginning of the show where Muddy and Sirius were throwing microwaves at the ceiling) Where were you for the past few questions!

Muddy: Aw does that matter? I mean, look at him. His ugliness would of surely broken the cameras by now.

Sirius: (bows head down and pretends to sniffle) That hurts.

Muddy: You're crying too? God this world is full of emos.

Sirius: . . . I'm going to name my math problem . . . Bordeaux! He shall be mine, and we shall rule the underworld!

Muddy: Isn't that the name of a cookie?

Sirius: Hell yeah it is!

Flare: (picks up another card off the coffee table) You have another question here Mud boy! I'm going to read it though for your skimming abilities bedazzle me.

Muddy: Fine, read the damn question, see if I care! And if it looks like crying in the corner, I'm not! I'm not dammit!

Flare: "Moses supposes his toeses are roses but Moses supposes erroneously, for Moses he knowses his toeses aren't roses as Moses supposes his toeses to be. But if Moses supposes his toeses are roses and he knowses his toeses aren't roses, then why does Moses supposes his toeses are roses?"

Muddy: I know the answer!

Flare: Ok, shoot.

Muddy: (gets excited) Shoot what?

Flare: Just answer the question!

Muddy: Geez. Okay, if Moses supposes his toeses are roses, but Moses knowses his toeses aren't roses, Moses must be goeses insanese therefore he needs to stop thinking his toeses are roses because he needs to knowses that it’s freaking me out!

Flare: That was an interesting answer . . .

Muddy: Thank you! (picks up the next card) Look there's a question for you Flare!

Flare: I can see that Muddy!

Muddy: (hands Flare the card) Good, 'cause I thought you couldn't.

Flare: "Which is better? Gardevoir or Banette?" Why do I get the weird question?

Sirius: Personally I thought Muddy's was weirder.

Flare: Gardevoir I think is best!

Muddy: (horrified) Wally's Pokémon! Gasp!

Flare: Er. Okay then. Banette.

Muddy: (horrified) Someone's Pokémon! Gasp!

Flare: (rolls eyes) . . . Either way, they're both good. One is psychic, one is dark, so technically, Banette should have the type advantage, but Gardevoir is strong all the same. So merry good day to you!

Muddy: Uh huh . . . A reviewer asks me. . . me- hey it's me! I'm Muddy right?

Flare: No Muddy, you're Flare.

Muddy: (confused) I thought you were Flare.

Flare: Just read the question.

Muddy: Sheesh, take the fun out of everything why dont'cha? "When do you change your socks?" I'd have to say every Tuesday, not unless it's a full moon, therefore I change my socks every hour on a rainy day in Uddy-may Orld-way.

Flare: Pig latin? Oh yeah, you have your own world Muddy . . .

Muddy: I do? Cool! Where was I? Oh yeah. So I change my socks every Thursday-

Flare: Tuesday.

Muddy: -Tuesday, but not unless it's a full . . . screw this! I change my socks when I wanna. Now for my underwear-

Flare: We don't want to know how many times you change your underwear Muddy.

Sirius: (chimes in)Or if you even change it at all really.

Muddy: Good, 'cause I wasn't going to tell you. (shifty eyes) Moving on. "How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" Hmm. Tough one.

Flare: Heh, can't wait to here the answer for this one.

Muddy: If a woodchuck could chuck wood is the key word. Well words there. If he COULD. That means he CAN'T so therefore I wouldn't know how much wood a woodchuck could chuck since a woodchuck couldn't chuck wood in the first place. Get what I'm saying?

Sirius: (confused) I don't.

Muddy: That's always good. Next! "When you think, does it hurt?" I dunno, you tell me.

Flare: He meant you smart arse.

Muddy: Me? Oh, I didn't know that. No, it doesn't hurt.

Flare: That's because he doesn't think in the first place.

Muddy: (grins) Yeah, she's right! Wait.

Flare: Un qué idiota.

Muddy: I heard that!

Flare: You know what it means?

Muddy: Hell no! English?

Sirius: It means what an idiot in Spanish.

Flare: Since when you do know Spanish?

Sirius: That was Spanish? I thought that was French. Wait. Is that why no one could understand me in France?

Flare: Since when were you in France?

Muddy: And why?

Sirius: Maybe you should butt out of my life and we wouldn't have this conversation God!

Flare: Er. Okay.

Muddy: Alas. I'm Muddy, not God. But one day!

Sirius: (eye twitch)

Flare: "Who is dumber, Brendan, Sirius, or Muddy?" Wow, that's hard.

Muddy: Tell me about it!

Flare: Anyways, at first I would say Brendan because you know what they say, a Pokémon takes after their trainer. I'm sure Sirius and Muddy weren't that dumb before but ever since they became Brendan's Pokémon. But in order I would say Muddy, Brendan, and Sirius. Brendan taught them to be dumb and Muddy took the advantage and trained to be dumber even more by knocking his head on the wall or tree or wherever we were. This is the results.

Muddy: (hunched over, back toward the audience) What? I'm not playing with fire to see if I light my tail would I explode if it comes to the end! What's this I'm holding that looks suspiciously like a lighted match you ask? It's Joey! The stick with a glowing head! (makes Joey dance by wiggling it in his paws) Woo . . . isn't he amazing?

Sirius: . . . No one asked him those questions Flare.

Flare: I know. My point proven. There you have it. And as for Sirius, he's not 'dumb', just a misunderstood, cookie eating, somewhat dark, playfully hyena that's still a puppy at heart.

Sirius: Damn right I am.

Flare: Next question. "Do you have a crush on any Pokémon you've met? Like that Charmeleon?" Well, he's a Charizard now . . . Not that I pay attention to him . . .(blushes)

Muddy: Flare? Having a crush? That's the sign that hell has froze over-

Sirius: No! Hell can't of frozen over! I'm sorry Boredeux, I failed you!

Flare: Um me? Have a crush? I don't.

Muddy: (nudges Flare with his elbow) Then what is that picture of Charizard you have stashed away in your dresser drawer in your trailer?

Flare: (alarmed) Shh! I told you not to tell anyone about that!

Muddy: Flare and Charizard sitting in a tree! A-B-C-D-E-F-G!

Flare: I don't like anyone! End of story! Next question!

Muddy: Ooh, avoiding it, good technique!

Flare: NEXT QUESTION! "Are you gonna grind me into head cheese for putting weird, strange thoughts in your head?" Yes, I think I will . . . Too bad I don't know where you live.

Muddy: Don't worry, it's a good thing. Trust me on this one.

Sirius: I must go now.

Muddy: And where are you going? We have a show to do!

Sirius: (looks at table) Well, we ran out of questions already! And I had this sudden urge for cheese. Maybe a certain cheese named, I don't know, Bob!

Muddy: Pfft. No one knows where Bob is. He's too cool to be seen. You're jealous.

Flare: Celoso.

Muddy: No, I'm not too fond of celery thank you.

Flare: Gah. I hate this job.

Muddy: I hate pidgeons. (cries)

Flare: Whatever.

(The lights of the set dim, excepts for Flare's who's turned back on since they were already off already. As the four Pokémon that occupied the audience started to shuffle out of the studio, another sound of broken glass on hard concrete rebounded through the room.)

Muddy: Heck yes! Two points for that toss!

Sirius: Punk.


------------------------------------

Ew crap. ;-;

LaTeR dAyZ!

Seijiro Mafuné
24th May 2006, 4:28 PM
...*dies laughing* Good job, boss-Lapras!

Although it was late, it was worth it! Now... first off, you added a lot more stuff, which is sweet! So off for the second part - you could have asked someone who knows Spanish how to write some of the words.

But eh, most of it is awesome. Nice remake!

Air Dragon
25th May 2006, 8:06 PM
Yay! the crazy duo are back!!!!! Review time!
I didn't quite laugh to death as i've read this before, but i sure came close! for my favouite parts, i quote:


Muddy: Whatever you say Flare. Next question!

Flare: What's this? Nothing witty to retaliate back.

Muddy: Go to hell my love.

Flare: Ouch.

That's what you think Flare! Go, Bemired Mud Boy!

Muddy: Aw does that matter? I mean, look at him? His ugliness would of surely broken the cameras by now.

Sirius: (bows head down and pretends to sniffle) That hurts.

Muddy: You're crying too? God this world is full of emos.

Sirius: . . . I'm going to name my math problem . . . Bordeaux! He shall be
mine, and we shall rule the underworld!

Muddy: Isn't that the name of a cookie?

Sirius: Hell yeah it is!

What so cool about the underworld anyway?!! Anybody wanna rule the overworld? Hunh???!!!!!

Okay, totally random but hey, so are all those guys! Sirius will never change, will he?


Muddy: Geez. Okay, if Moses supposes his toeses are roses, but Moses knowses his toeses aren't roses, Moses must be goeses insanese therefore he needs to stop thinking his toeses are roses because he needs to knowses that it’s freaking me out!

Flare: That was an interesting answer . . .

As Sirius would say, damn straight...


Muddy: Flare and Charizard sitting in a tree! A-B-C-D-E-F-G!

Flare: I don't like anyone! End of story! Next question!

To Muddy: there's a really great spelling teacher...in KINDERGARTEN!
To flare: liar...

thanks for the laugh ! you made my week! Later!

Sike Saner
25th May 2006, 10:26 PM
Hi.

I should have popped in and reviewed this frigging ages ago. Shame on my Caligan ***.

But anyway, I finally got around to this, and I liked what I read. Funny, funny stuff, and I just want to hug Muddy to death, lovable ******* that he is. ^^

Yet, I kind of feel like maybe I shouldn't be calling him a "*******" regardless of whether or no he technically classifies as one... o.o I dunno, should I?

Anyway, the gags are just lovely, and Muddy in particular kept saying priceless little things. And for a while after this, I'm probably going to find myself thinking of him and laughing anytime I come across a mention of Latios somewhere. XP

Moments I found particularly funny:


Muddy: No, Flare. I'm-

Flare: An idiot?

Muddy: No! I'm-

Flare: Latios?


Muddy: -and you know, you can't have your heart break 'cause, you know, you'll . . . die dude. DIE!


Flare: I'm sure it does. Now what were we talking about? Ah yes, you're the one that's stupid.

Muddy: You're stupid?

Flare: . . . Yes Muddy. I'm stupid.

Muddy: Haha, you're stupid!


Muddy: It's tough being a Swampert especially with a chicken . . . a fire type chicken. Hmm . . . I wonder Flare . . . If you used your Flamethrower on yourself, would you eat yourself? Is it like having handy dandy food wherever you go?

::Flare looks Muddy's way dully and wearily.::


Muddy: What? Oh, who are you guys! I'm Latios! Rawr!


(A loud, heaving cough-)

Flare: Lack of vocab Breezeh? You've used heaving as least three times in
five lines.

(...Suddenly, the lights dim on the smirking, overconfident, overgrown chicken who should shut up if she knows what's good for her.)


Muddy: Yeah okay. Right. Where are we again? Sometimes I get this note to come here and sometimes there's a trail of candy coming here and then it stops and then I forget what I was going to do and . . . hmm. I be Muddy and let me say I can heave microwaves over your head.


Flare: Description isn't suppose to talk.

(Says the chicken who looks even more stupider than Muddy because she's talking to herself since no one can hear supposed description. Your face can't talk Flare. Your face!)


Flare: (shakes head) Muddy, you're a catfish.

Muddy: You're face is a catfish.

Flare: Yeah okay, what's with the face jokes? They get OLD.

(Face jokes may get old, indeed, but they still kick my *** every time. Alas. XP)


Flare: Bob is a cheese. Bob can't breathe. Bob can't be you're lover.


Muddy: (grins) Anyways! "Should I choose a Treeko, Mudkip, or Torchic in Sapphire?" That's so cliché. Choose a walnut as your starter. That'd be kick-arse. Walnut would all hop out into battle, fire burning in his tiny, yet hopeful eyes, and the crowds will cheer him on, screaming his name. You know what attack he would use Flare?


Muddy: Snapadoozles. (picks up a card, grins, and rubs it in Flare's face) Look at this homeslice! Look at it!

Flare: (grabs card out of Muddy's hand forcefully and stares at the card) There's nothing on it.

Muddy: (holding another card) I know! I just needed to distract you so I could get a card.


Flare: Gardevoir I think is best!

Muddy: (horrified) Wally's Pokémon! Gasp!

Flare: Er. Okay then. Banette.

Muddy: (horrified) Someone's Pokémon! Gasp!

(^ HILARIOUS. Officially my favorite moment of all of them.)


Muddy: (hunched over, back toward the audience) What? I'm not playing with fire to see if I light my tail would I explode if it comes to the end! What's this I'm holding that looks suspiciously like a lighted match you ask? It's Joey! The stick with a glowing head! (makes Joey dance by wiggling it in his paws) Woo . . . isn't he amazing?


Muddy: Flare and Charizard sitting in a tree! A-B-C-D-E-F-G!

The Dean of Suds
26th May 2006, 1:00 AM
:D I just died laughing there! There were so many quote-worthy moments I'll just say you had me laughing from start to finish. Awsome job,Breezy.

Maygirl3112
28th July 2006, 7:40 AM
Well it was nice and funny .....REALLY FUNNY and i think i like it when you make Muddy stupiddy HAHAHA!!!!