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Yoru Ryu
1st November 2005, 1:07 PM
PM next chapter (because i'll forget if i don't write it down)

X Kazemon
Guitar dude bill
Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

I did have a parody here with the Elite Four or Kanto, Johto and Hoenn doing the plot of Shrek2 but i didn't finish it anywhere other than ff.net -_-

Hope this 'script' style is acceptable. Things like this are always funnier in script style and this is set out clear and whatnot... eh.

This has gonnen some good reviews on ff.net so apparently SOME pople find it funny (and sily XD).

Aaaand, don't read if you don't like stereotypes, k? People are just too sensitive.


Author: Yoru Ryu AKA Rainy Day
Rating: PG-13 for occasional language and innuendo
Disclaimer: Yoru owns nothing, so no legal action please. And some jokes here are the result of Nikki who has a great sense of humour XD

A/N: Just to add another humour fic to my collection, it may get silly. I like script style as it can make things even funnier and I don’t see why it isn’t welcomed most places. Let’s see if this goes anywhere…and thanks to Nikki for the flashback scenes--you rule girl.


Pokemon Colosseum
(That's not a rubbish bag; it's Rui!)

Act:1
Scene: A low fat feel good bacteria

A Skarmory flies across the screen, we don’t actually know if this is the same Skarmory that the big bad boss man has, nobody explains it, all we know is you never see it again… Perhaps it got itself lodged in the Cliffside? And nobody will ever know nya!

AUNDIENCE: For God’s Sake!

The scene changes to five quintuplets walking round in circles - Lets just say their names are Bill, Phil, Gill, Dill and… Fredwardo and a very uncomfortable looking man.

BOOM!

GONZAP THE CONSTIPATED: Whoa, what was that? Come my Band of Merry Men!

Below grounds… though not under sea level – that’d just be stupid.

WES: I did it!
UMBREON: (Sarcastic) Huzzah…
WES: Now we just have to find that crazy arm thing…
UMBREON: (Sighs)

Completely ignoring the fact that Gonzap The Constipated and his band of Merry Men are on their way down Wes and his black dog thing wander around the room.

UMBREON: Hey, I found it!
WES: Espeon –
UMBREON: Umbreon
WES: - Umbreon, calm down or your gonna get me into trouble.
UMBREON: And breaking and entering isn’t going to get you in trouble?
GONZAP THE CONSTIPATED’S VOICE: WES!
WES: Now you’ve gone and done it.
UMBREON: Sure. Blame the non-human one.

Wes sees three different coloured snag machines in the center of the room.

UMBREON: Didn’t do a very good job about hiding them did they? (Looks around) Not even any guards.
WES: Preccccciouuussssss…
UMBREON: Um.

Wes closely examines the three machines of blue, red and pink. He picks up the red one.

WES: Does this make me look fat?
UMBREON: Of course not. It complements your eyes.

He takes the blue one.

WES: Hows ‘bout this?
UMBREON: Hmmmm… (Scratches chin) I always imagined you a spring shade.
WES: Right you are (Takes the pink one)
AUDIENCE: How stupidly obvious for a boy to take something pink in a humour story…
WES: Now to escape (Throws arm in the air) To the Batmobile, Robin!

Try again.

WES: To the Mystery Machine, Scoob!

Nope.

WES: To the Speedo… ah… I mean Speeder, Umbreon!

Much Better

BOOM!

Gonzap The Constipated runs out and grabs the back of Wes’s Speedo... er… Speeder.

WES: Eheheh, Onwards! (Throws the bike in reverse by accident and runs over Gonzap The Constipated) Eeps. Back to jail for me, hehehe.

The speeder continues its path backwards and through the hole in the building…

AUDIENCE: What hole?
YORU: Oh, did I not mention that part? Yeah, my bad.

… and towards another wall – this time with no hole.

YORU: Happy now?
AUNDIENCE: Hardly! We don’t even want to be here.

Espeon, seeing the cofuffle Wes’ got them into teleports them to the middle of the desert.

CHRISTIAN FUNDAMENTALISTS: We told you! That Espeon is Satan! This proves it! (Wave bibles about)
AUNDIENCE: ‘Cofuffle’?
YORU: it’s a word!

Outskirt stand.

WES: (Eating chips)
AMERICAN AUDIENCE: What the Hell are chips?
BRITISH AUDIENCE: Idiots.
AMERICAN AUDIENCE: Hah! By ‘chips’ they mean ‘French fries’
BRITISH AUDIENCE: Idiots.

Two strange men walk down the ramp of the old Locomotive restaurant, they seem slightly miss-shaped for they’re bending over like hunchbacks.

DUSTY’S VOICE: Thank you, come again!
FOLLY: (Holds hand to head) Oh, what atrocious service. I for one am never returning to this urine soaked Hellhole.
TRUDLY: I disagree. You could’ve called it a ‘Pee pee soaked heck hole’…
FOLLY: Well corrected my four-fingered friend.
TRUDLY: Terribly bad when that bloke tried to fondle me under the table.
FOLLY: The one with pink hair?
TRUDLY: The very same.
FOLLY: Well, I heard he…
WES: (Notices the moving bag in the boot of the van) Hmmmm…

Wes walks over to the moving bag while the two ‘gentlemen’ fervently discuss their terrible experience in the restaurant carriage.

ESPEON: Suspicious…
UMBREON: I concur.
WES: Hmmm…
BAG: (Wiggles) Help me, you moron!
WES: Hmmmm… (Opens bag)
BAG: I can see the light, and it burns!
WES: (Stuffs his chip carton in the bag) Hmmmmm…
BAG: Hey! Don’t throw your rubbish in here!
WES: (Ties the bag up again) Hmmmmm…
BAG: Nooooo!

The two strangers walk back to their van.

FOLLY: OI! (Hits Wes round the back of the head) Keep you filthy hands off of my bag sack!

They leave. Now, inside the locomotive.

Do the Locomotion~

Wes and his purple and black dogs walk over to the counter, the TV comes on.

NEWSREADER: Literally seconds after the ‘Hero’ of this game has made his escape our rag-tag team of news reporters have discovered this blown out building. (Points to a sign) Convenient eh?

SIGN: Team Snagem Headquarters – signed, Supreme Overlord Gonzap!

NEWSREADER: We have yet to determine what this building was used for, however we do suspect it to be smuggling X-rated footage of Prince Charles into the country (shudders)… back to you at the station, Jerry.
JERRY: Thank you, now we have just received some of the footage of Prince Charles. People of a nervous disorder, young children and pregnant women should look away… now.

A random woman in the carriage screams and chucks her teacup at the TV in horror.

DUSTY: HEY!
WOMAN: Sorry…
DUSTY: (Turns to Wes) How may I be of service to you Mr…?
WES: Gotta think of a line fast!
DUSTY: Excuse me?
WES: Wait, did I just say that out loud?
DUSTY: Um (gasps) you’re the ‘Hero’ of the game!
WES: AHHHHHHHH! (Runs out)
DUSTY: Thank you, come again.

The pink haired man who tried to fondle Trudly shuffles out after Wes.

ESPEON: What a shifty character.
WILLIE: I see you are a Pokemon trainer…
UMBREON: (Rolls eyes) What a line.
WES: A... what?
WILLIE: A Pokemon trainer.
WES: Oh, no. I don’t have any Pokemon.

Willie, Espeon and Umbreon stare at Wes a long moment.

WILLIE: What about them then? (Points to the Eons.)
WES: They’re mine? God, I thought they just followed me round ‘cause they had nothing better to do!
UMBREON: I have way better things to do than follow you around!
ESPEON: I don’t…
WILLIE: ANYway! How’d you get them on the motorbike?
WES: Oh, oh! I know that joke! Ahem, POKE ‘EM ON!
WILLIE: What?
WES: How’d you get two Pikachu in a car? Poke ‘em on!
WILLIE: (Ignores him) Would you like to battle?
WES: No, I don’t have any Pokemon! I’ve told you already.

Wes grabs up his belongings and stalks off to the speeder, Espeon and Umbreom follow and they all speed off.

WILLIE: Drat, another through the net.

The next town along Folly and Trudley are struggling under the weight of the mysterious bag.

WES: You do know the rubbish men come by on Wednesdays don’t you?
FOLLY: This ain’t a rubbish bag.
WES: Yeah it is. I put my rubbish in there so therefore it’s a rubbish bag.
TRUDLY: Look! Just shut up, how’re we supposed to do any struggling when you keep distracting us!?
ESPEON: (Uses psychic abilities to throw the bag in a Dumpster) Done and dusted.
BAG: Ow.

No need to get violent.

WES: (Looks around) Who said that?

I did.

WES: Who?

Me.

WES: Hm, I’m hearing things again, just like when that voice told me to kill all my friends, so I did an’ got sent to jail for life and then just like any justice system I’m free and killing friends again after only two months… eh... what were we talking about again?
ESPEON: Who’s is he talking to?
UMBREON: God knows.
FOLLY: Oh I cannot take this anymore! If anybody wants me I’ll be in the VIP lounge!

Folly and Trudly run off leaving their van and the rubbish bag.

BAG: For the last time I am not a rubbish bag!

Dash walks past and drops a sweet wrapper on the floor. Wes picks it up.

WES: Hey, moron! There’s a rubbish bag right there (Points.)
BAG: NOT A RUBBISH BAG!
DASH: Should a rubbish bag talk like that?
WES: It talks? (Spins around)

Everyone walks over to it and Wes picks up a pointy stick and pokes it.

WES: Pokey, pokey.

A muffled curse from the bag and a hand grabs the pokey stick through the material and shakes it about violently.

WES: Oh God it’s sucking me in!
ESPEON: Just let go of the stick, genius.
UMBREON: (Smacks Wes for insubordination)
YORU: See? I told you he was just an innocent victim.
AUDIENCE: Bloody sympathizer.

Wes opens the bag and Rui jumps out.

RUI: For the sake of my reputation as a medium I would first like to say I don’t stand for violence of any sort…

Rui smacks Wes.

RUI: And that I am not a rubbish character you can just run away from. No, no I follow you everywhere. There is no escape from my hauntingly big eyes that will follow you around the room, no. No escape at all! Muhahahaha! Think the Mona Lisa on Prozac...


It’s true. I always try to lose you in Agate but whenever I go into a house you suddenly appear… must be a time traveler. Tell me, are you Doctor Who?

RUI: Doctor who?

Exactly.

ESPEON: Does she have a Tardis?
UMBREON: I reckon she uses that rubbish bag.
RUI: I do not travel in time! My pet can though… have you met Celebi?
AUDIENCE: If she were an original character and had a Celebi people’d say she was a Mary-Sue now.

And that isn’t fair. Just because an original character has a Legendary doesn’t mean they’re all high and mighty!

RUI: Oh you’re just getting uppy ‘cause every character in ‘The Dragon Homeland’ has a Legendary Pokemon.

Well, yes… but most of the main characters aren’t original anyway…

RUI: Excuses, excuses…

Can we get back on track please?

RUI: So tell me, Wes. Why’d you join Team Snagem? (Mutters) Like I already don’t know.
WES: Well, a lot of people say I was an abused child or orphaned but I can’t remember which…

I think I’ll go for abused first… hit it, Wes!

WES: Yes, I was an abused child in the past…
ESPEON: I feel a flashback coming on.
UMBREON: Now look what you’ve done!

Ten years earlier…

WES’S MUM: (Screams at Wes)
WES’S DAD: (Smacks Wes over the head with a two-by-four)
BOTH: Hot damn, we’re awful.
KIDDIE WES: Pity me, pity meeeee!

Back to the present. And now we’ll try with orphaned.

WES: And then my parents where killed in an accident on the roads…

Eighteen years ago.

A road through the middle of nowhere. A cheese truck speeds along, a pale gray man with wild purple hair and glowing red eyes is at the wheel. Next to him sits a single passenger reading a roadmap.

NASCOUR: Gonzap, have you figured out that accursed map yet?
GONZAP: I’m trying, sir.
NASCOUR: You’ve been trying for 20 minutes. We’ll have missed our exit; let me see that map!
GONZAP: Shouldn’t you watch the road?

Nascour yanks the map away.

NASCOUR: Hmmmm…

Meanwhile, in a mini headed the opposite direction…

WES’S DAD: Wes’s mum, Wes’s been crying for a half hour now! Would you try to see what’s wrong with him?
WES’S MUM: (Looks behind the seat) Oh, dear, he’s got a terrible rash. I'll get the cream, oh, it's behind your seat, i can't reach it.
WES’S DAD: Here, I’ll try…
WES’S MUM: Shouldn’t you watch the road?

8.7 seconds later…

CRRRASSSH!

Nascour and Gonzap climb out of the crashed cheese truck.

NASCOUR: Oh, crap.
GONZAP: Erm, they look pretty dead to me.
NASCOUR: Well, just a little setback. We can still make the Cheddar convention on time. Go hitch a lift, peon.
GONZAP: Okay.

Gonzap flags down a passing car, gets in, and drives off.
NASCOUR: What the--? Gonzap, you idiot, I meant for both of us! Come back here! …Oh, bollocks. (Looks around) Great, no civilization for miles. Well, best start walking.

He wanders off.

In the present.

WES: And that’s it.
RUI: (Waits) That didn’t explain anything.

They leave to see the mayor.

AUDIENCE: Wait, what about the Mirror B --?

No, no, not much time, gotta skip as much as we can, we’re late, we’re late, we’re late!

AUDIENCE: Aww.

Anyway, enter mysterious figure.

NASCOUR: I’m so great!
AUDIENCE: Everyone bow to Master Nascour.
NASCOUR: Now, lets see… you must be… Miss Rui. Gonzap’s told me a lot about you. And your parents. Dentists, aren’t they? (Slits eyes) I hate dentists. (Turns to Wes) Sandy hair… vacant expression… you must be Wes.
WES: Man, does he know me or what? (Grins)
RUI: Why are you wearing a dress?
NASCOUR: It’s a gown, brat.

Rui touches Nascour’s chest.

NASCOUR: Not the paintwork!
RUI: Paint?
NASCOUR: Yes. To get this nice tight effect I simply paint on the top half of the outfit.
RUI: So that’s a skirt then?
NASCOUR: Actually they’re my pajamas. Evice and me just had a sleepover.

Say, how old are you?

NASCOUR: Well, I’ve been told I can play from anywhere from twenty to thirty but on a good day I’m told I can pass for late teens whereas a bad day…

Sorry I asked.

NASCOUR: (Looks down his nose at Wes) I like the looks of you… and not in the perverted way the players must think when I say this line in the game. I’ll see you later I’m sure.
WES: …
NASCOUR: Leader of Cipher, here’s my card. Come if you get lonely. (Smirks) No pressure.

He strides off to his hotel room slash love nest.

RUI: Well, that was unexpected.
ESPEON: I guess you humans all have low standards since your faces are pretty twisted in Pokemon Colosseum.
WES: Why do guys keep hitting on me…?

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Tother chapters are better i believe, 'specially chapter three D:

Ah, well. Anything to say, say it no or forever hold your breath... until you want to say something eles, heh.

Either here comes the onslaught or nothing at all -_-

Angel-FoX-crescent
1st November 2005, 1:48 PM
Dies laughing,
I find the Gonzap and his band of merry men part hailous.
And Wes a pink snag machine? Come on, that's my colour! Lol^^

As peter Kay says: And 1! We all like to laugh that's humor

11/10

Sike Saner
1st November 2005, 2:18 PM
O_O

IT'S THIS! IT'S HERE! ^_^ Awesome. Now, please, have some highlights:


WES: To the Speedo… ah… I mean Speeder, Umbreon!


Gonzap The Constipated runs out and grabs the back of Wes’s Speedo... er… Speeder.

Fwee, Speedo jokes. That's always great. ^_^


FOLLY: (Holds hand to head) Oh, what atrocious service. I for one am never returning to this urine soaked Hellhole.
TRUDLY: I disagree. You could’ve called it a ‘Pee pee soaked heck hole’…

I cited this last time, and I'm citing it again. *hugs for use of awesome reference*


TRUDLY: Terribly bad when that bloke tried to fondle me under the table.
FOLLY: The one with pink hair?
TRUDLY: The very same.

XP Okay, now weirdly, that seemed to slip right by me last time. I think I was still going on about the "Pee pee soaked heck hole", actually.


WES: Oh, no. I don’t have any Pokemon.

Willie, Espeon and Umbreon stare at Wes a long moment.

*snort* That's just terrific.


BAG: Ow.

Okay, that's just funny. I can't help it. There's just something unspeakably hilarious about dialogue being attributed to "BAG". XP Probably, it would be even funnier to someone if they don't know that there's someone actually in the bag.


BAG: NOT A RUBBISH BAG!

See above. XD


Everyone walks over to it and Wes picks up a pointy stick and pokes it.

WES: Pokey, pokey.

Poking at things = Funny. Always.


WES’S MUM: (Screams at Wes)
WES’S DAD: (Smacks Wes over the head with a two-by-four)
BOTH: Hot damn, we’re awful.

XD And there's something else that didn't hit me until the second time around.


A cheese truck speeds along,

Yes, I am calling you on this again. Of all the things that truck could have been carrying, you chose CHEESE. CHEESE, among the very funniest of foods alongside bananas and pies. IT POSITIVELY SLAYS ME.

You know, the CHEESE truck may explain how Gonzap came to be "Gonzap the Constipated"...

Anyway, I love this story, but you already knew that. ^_^ Keep the funny rolling!

Yoru Ryu
1st November 2005, 5:05 PM
Dies laughing,
I find the Gonzap and his band of merry men part hailous.
And Wes a pink snag machine? Come on, that's my colour! Lol^^

As peter Kay says: And 1! We all like to laugh that's humor

Whoo! Hope ya stick around for the other chapters, Angel-Fox. Thanks!




A lot of stuff that i'm too lazy to quote an' all that XD



You're great, y'know that? XD

You've gotta be careful though. Reading things through for a second time looses some of the humour; and that's why, if enough people here show interest, i'm gonna add stuff into this. To make it different from the original you've read so far. Maybe some outtakes too, hm.

Thanks for replying too! I always get ignored here -_-

Angel-FoX-crescent
1st November 2005, 5:19 PM
Hee-hee
I look forward to the future chapters lol.

Yami Ryu
1st November 2005, 5:31 PM
Oh god you must continue, CONTINUE I SAY OR I WILL BURN YOU ... with ... with a magikarp of doom :D .. which I painted gold and can throw like a holy hand grenade. *coughs* *did not steal that from monty python*

But seriously, you neeeeeed to continue with posting this, I'm tired of seeing crappy scripts that don't do anything, and aren't even funny ;; *clings to Yoru* pleeeeeaaaaase continue.

Anyways; I was laughing irl through the entire fic/script, especially the poke scene, the 'Gonzap the Constipated' the pink snag machine bit and the flashbacks XD

~*Ratiosu*~
1st November 2005, 5:42 PM
Totally, totally hilarious. I laughed the hardest at the conversation between Wes and "the bag" when he stuffs his chip carton in there and just keeps saying "Hmmm...." that was awesome. I suck at complete randomness, though I might give it another shot. *X's Latios starts barfing*

ALTO (the Latios) : That was a terrbile interview...I never want to read any of your things again!
X: Just because I suck doesn't mean you have to pick on me!!!! *cries*
ALTO: By the way, you didn't need to explain my name was Alto. God, anyone with an IQ over 15 would know my name was Alto...*rants for hours*
X: *with earplugs in* SEE? I SUCK!
ALTO: I agree 100%.

Yoru Ryu
1st November 2005, 5:56 PM
Hee-hee
I look forward to the future chapters lol.

Because it's just full of that Wes-y goodness :P



Oh god you must continue, CONTINUE I SAY OR I WILL BURN YOU ... with ... with a magikarp of doom :D .. which I painted gold and can throw like a holy hand grenade. *coughs* *did not steal that from monty python*

But seriously, you neeeeeed to continue with posting this, I'm tired of seeing crappy scripts that don't do anything, and aren't even funny ;; *clings to Yoru* pleeeeeaaaaase continue.

Anyways; I was laughing irl through the entire fic/script, especially the poke scene, the 'Gonzap the Constipated' the pink snag machine bit and the flashbacks XD


XD

*Steals from Monty Python also* You'll notice a few MP references as this continues for the simple fact that Monty Python owns all! They always pop up in my other parodies too *whistles*

I'm happy this is funny too. Doing humour stuff is always somehow different than regular stuff.

Thanks ^.^



Totally, totally hilarious. I laughed the hardest at the conversation between Wes and "the bag" when he stuffs his chip carton in there and just keeps saying "Hmmm...." that was awesome. I suck at complete randomness, though I might give it another shot. *X's Latios starts barfing*

ALTO (the Latios) : That was a terrbile interview...I never want to read any of your things again!
X: Just because I suck doesn't mean you have to pick on me!!!! *cries*
ALTO: By the way, you didn't need to explain my name was Alto. God, anyone with an IQ over 15 would know my name was Alto...*rants for hours*
X: *with earplugs in* SEE? I SUCK!
ALTO: I agree 100%.


Wow! I never thought i'd get any replies! Maybe i WILL continue now -^^- Haha, if you thouht this chapter was random wait for the others XD It just gets crazier! Thanks for replying, means a lot -^^-

Can't have enough comedy around!

katiekitten
1st November 2005, 6:22 PM
Well done! This was hilarious! I really can't wait fro the next chapter. :D

~*Ratiosu*~
1st November 2005, 6:46 PM
Thankies! If you make more chapters...I will be SOOO happy...I knew this would be a good fic when I saw it was written by you, my favoritest fan art member...I know you make awesome dolls, but this is even coolier. I can't waut for your shop to open again (though if it's open right now I will feel stupid about earlier comment). I also like the Speedo comment...

ALTO: I wear Speedos!
X: *hitting over head with frying pan* SHUT UP!

Bluestar Jet
1st November 2005, 7:31 PM
NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
you don't have chapter two. This is SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOO ****ING FUNNY!

Nylf
1st November 2005, 8:02 PM
Stupidly funny. Gonzap the Constipated still makes me laugh. Now where's Felix_the_Mutant_Pikachu? He would love this. And give a deservingly random review.

Yoru Ryu
1st November 2005, 8:20 PM
Well done! This was hilarious! I really can't wait fro the next chapter. :D

Hehe, thanks!



Thankies! If you make more chapters...I will be SOOO happy...I knew this would be a good fic when I saw it was written by you, my favoritest fan art member...I know you make awesome dolls, but this is even coolier. I can't waut for your shop to open again (though if it's open right now I will feel stupid about earlier comment). I also like the Speedo comment...


Having a reputation somewhere else works wonders ^^ Favourite fanart member? Nah, i'm a crappy artist other than Dolls and what are they? Tiny XD I like writing parodies better than art though -^^- And you should know... the shop is never open XD I take my sweet time, me.



NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
you don't have chapter two. This is SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOO ****ING FUNNY!


I'm glad it's actually funny ^^ Chapter 2 is basically finished, it just needs some finishing humour :D



Stupidly funny. Gonzap the Constipated still makes me laugh. Now where's Felix_the_Mutant_Pikachu? He would love this. And give a deservingly random review.


Silly, silly, silly. That's how it should be described... in a good way XD Once again i'm happy it can draw out a chuckle -^^-

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

Oooooh, and thank you and hugs to whoever voted the stars thing. Come collect your hug XD

Angel-FoX-crescent
1st November 2005, 9:04 PM
[QUOTE=Yoru Ryu]Because it's just full of that Wes-y goodness :P


Naturally ^^;249-d;

Yoru Ryu
2nd November 2005, 12:23 PM
I have the basics of chapter 2 finshed really; they don't take long. It's just a little short in length. It COULD be up later tonight but i dunno :D

NEO GOHAN
3rd November 2005, 2:36 AM
Hell, this is so HILARAMOUS!!! I don't usually like things that try too hard to be funny, but this looks almost effortless! I can almost imagine this becoming a movie directed by Weird Al Yankovic!!!(I can already hear his accordian in the background music...XD) You should go into the comedy business Yoru!
NG

Yoru Ryu
3rd November 2005, 11:52 AM
Hell, this is so HILARAMOUS!!! I don't usually like things that try too hard to be funny, but this looks almost effortless! I can almost imagine this becoming a movie directed by Weird Al Yankovic!!!(I can already hear his accordian in the background music...XD) You should go into the comedy business Yoru!
NG

It's easy really. Just butcher their personalities XD I do actually want to co-write a sketch show like The Fast Show or Monty Python and others along those lines. Too bad we don't have comedy like that anymore. Thanks for replying ^.^

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: First of all I’d like to apologise for the lack of funny in this chapter. It’s a very bland part of the game for me and I had no idea how to parody it. So, eep.


Pokemon Colosseum
(Bathroom needs)

Act: 2
Scene: Dictionaries and thesauruses are your friends!

Nascour leaves for his hotel room slash love nest.

RUI: Well, better go inside.
WES: You can’t tell me what to do, you’re not my mother!
RUI: Well, put it this way: if you won’t go in I’ll show Espeon and Umbreon that picture of you in pumps…
WES: You said there was no film in that camera!
RUI: (Grins) I lied.

They all walk in the mayors office. It’s not like you have much choice anyway when Rui’s practically on top of you. That sounded so wrong.

EVICE: I will rule the world!
UMBREON: Ahem.
EVICE: I mean, uh, good morning?
RUI: Hey! We aren’t meant to know who you are!
ES CADE: Better?
RUI: I guess…

Silence follows.

RUI: It’s your line you great turnip!
ES CADE: Well I can’t very well say my line if you boyfriend isn’t here!
RUI: Eh?

Rui looks around for Wes and finally spots him outside peering around the doorframe. She walks over to him.

RUI: Wes! Get in here!

Wes whimpers.

RUI: Aw, what’s the matter?
WES: Fat people scare me…
RUI: Really?
UMBREON: It’s true.
ESPEON: Yup! When he was smaller some fat guy mistook him for a lamppost and crushed him when he leaned on him.
UMBREON: It’s the skinny factor… he was even offered a spot as a supermodel.

Has mental images of Wes in a dress on the catwalk. Scarred for life.

ESPEON: And then a drunken guy dressed as Father Christmas tripped over him in the mall and flattened him when he was going over his Christmas list.
UMBREON: Haven’t you noticed how thin he is? Well that’s the reason.

Rui looks back to Wes.

RUI: I… see. Well, there’s no need to be scared of Es Cade; he’s only the humourous villain.
ES CADE: Humourous!? Well I never!
WES: So, it’s safe?
RUI: Yes.

Wes crawls in the door to sit near Rui.

RUI: (Pats his head) Good boy. (Gives doggy treat for good behaviour)
ES CADE: Well, on to business.
UMBREON: Finally.
ES CADE: Isn’t it strange how my name changes from one thing to another? Anyway, go to the Colosseum!
WES: You can’t tell me what to do, you’re not my father!

Suddenly the lights go out.

EVICE: (Inhales, exhales) Wes, I am your father!
WES: Really?
EVICE: No, not really. I haven’t any written proof of that.
WES: Oh.

Cliché or what? The lights come back on.

RUI: (Sighs) Talk about a split personality…
ES CADE: Go to the Colosseum! It’s what the game is named after.
WES: I know that! I’m not stupid!

Wes walks away from the desk to leave but misses the doorway and walks into the wall.

ESPEON: Oh!
RUI: Ouch!
UMBREON: Ha!

They peel Wes from the wall and continue on to the Phenic Colosseum. Wes starts hopping around.

RUI: (Annoyed) What’s the matter now?
WES: I gotta go!
RUI: Oh for Heaven’s sake! Can’t you hold it?
UMBREON: For the next couple months…
ESPEON: That’s how long the gamers will play this… then we’re free!

Just go in that trainer’s…thing… and ask Justy, or whatever his name is.

WES: It’s that voice again!
RUI: Here we go. (Smacks Wes) Get inside!
ESPEON: I can’t help but notice all this shouting…
UMBREON: You’d be deaf if you couldn’t… and with ears like yours that’d surprise me.
ESPEON: (Grumbles)

In the trainer’s… thing.

WES: I gotta go!
JUSTY: Um, hello… to you… too?
RUI: Do you have a bathroom?
JUSTY: (Gasps) Of course not! There is nothing like that in a Pokemon game, jeez. That’s sacrilege! How long have you been around?
RUI: (Grabs Justy) Look you idiot! I am not just some n00b with the attention span of a plastic spoon! I am a professional Pokemon character and if you don’t tell me where I can find a toilet for my friend I’m gonna pummel that jacket right off of you so the only way you’ll be able to eat is through a straw!
JUSTY: Squeak!

Better find a bathroom soon ‘cause it’ll only get worse…

UMBREON: (Catches on) Oh God! That Colosseum is full of water!
ESPEON: (Sniffs) I wanna go home!
WES: I wanna goooo… hm?

Something sparkly grips Wes’ attention.

WES: Glasses! Purple Sparkly Glasses! Preccciouuuus…

Somewhere… else. Or it could just be at the mayor’s place. Who knows?

MIROR B: My, my. I do seem to have misplaced my glasses. My Purple Sparkly Glasses. Jeeves!
JEEVES: (Lurch-esc) You raaang?
MIROR B: You haven’t perchance seen my spectacles have you?
JEEVES: No sir.
MIROR B: Ah, no matter. Bring me my hair!
JEEVES: Do I have to, sir? It is awfully heavy… and large… sir.
MIROR B: Bring me what you can carry, my noggin is getting drafty.
JEEVES: (Groans and leaves to fetch the hair)

Back… away from Miror B. Thank God.

ESPEON: If those aren’t yours you have to turn them in.
UMBREON: Goody-two-shoes.

Wes puts the glasses on and his vision is severely hindered.

WES: (Tries to look at Espeon) Just ‘cause your eight feet tall doesn’t mean you can tell me what to do, Espeon.
UMBREON: I’m Umbreon.
RUI: Why does he always get them mixed up? They don’t even look similar.

Suddenly, and for no reason other than the author wants it to happen and to remind you we are still with Justy, the back wall of the trainer… thing shifts back to reveal some high tech gadgetry army battle room… or something like that. That PDA woman runs out to Justy.

PDA WOMAN: General Justy!
UMBREON: (S******s)
PDA WOMAN: Pyrite Colosseum have launched an attack on our trainer thing.
JUSTY: (Weeps) No one knows the name of this trainer thing I run!
PDA WOMAN: Forget that! What should we do about the missiles?

Justy and the PDA woman run over to a control panel of sorts. But since this is Colosseum when they run their legs move faster than the area they cover while at the ‘run’.

JUSTY: Hit the retaliate button.
PDA WOMAN: Er… um, er…
JUSTY: Any button; they all retaliate!

Justy turns back to Wes and Rui.

RUI: And that was?
JUSTY: Er, let me explain how this trainer thing works!
UMBREON: Finally, Wes knows nothing!
RUI: Mh-hm...

They all look through a viewing panel to see two trainers in the same dorky training clothes battling with two Gyarados.

JUSTY: We let our lead trainer kill of the weak ones before the next school year.

Some of the first years cry as their friends are eaten in a horrible 20, 000 Leagues under the sea style bloodbath. Wes panics. He will continue to do this for the rest of the game.

Skipping ahead to the Colosseum. A strange man with long arms prances about the walls.

GUY: I wonder that fish has gone. Fishy, fishy, fishy, fish. You did love him so.

Oddly enough the Phenic Colosseum strongly resembles a washing machine. Or a Laundromat or whatever they’re called… I dunno, I have my own washing machine. Two other people continue to slap each other across the face with varying sized fishes.

WES: I want to battle!
RECEPTIONIST: No, no, far too early to be breaking out the Colosseums. Go back to the Mayor.
WES: Good job too. I don’t have any Pokemon.
ESPEON AND UMBREON: (Groan)
RUI: Maybe we can go swimming.
RECEPTIONIST: No, not really. That’s not real water… it’s watered-down jelly.
WES: And I don’t wanna see Rui’s webbed feet again.
RUI: I do NOT have webbed feet!

On their way out of the Colosseum they run into Folly and Trudly… again. God, they just won’t go away.

FOLLY: Give us the Snag machine!
RUI: Very blunt aren’t you?
TRUDLY: He’s a part of Team Snagem!

No matter what option you choose when Rui asks you if it’s true she still doesn’t seem to mind so…

RUI: WHAT!? (Turns to Wes) How could you!? (Slaps him) And to think I was going to let you get to second base!
WES: Aw, but I don’t like sports…
RUI: (Slaps him again) We were going to get married!
WES: (Starts)
RUI: Have lots and lots of children!
WES: (Squeaks) Lots…?
RUI: (Grabs Wes’s hair) About fifteen!
WES: Fifteen!

A long silent pause carries on. The Author starts wondering if this has changed into a Silent Movie, like back in the good ol’ days.

WES: … Is that more than three?
RUI: (Hisses) Lots more. (Stands back) They’ll help out on the farm… in Johto… just outside Goldenrod city… where we can help other underprivileged children have a better life… by using them as cheap labour… slave labour…
FOLLY: (To Wes) I’m so sorry m’boy.
TRUDLY: Surely this is a fate worse than sitting through an entire performance by Elton John.
UMBREON: Hey, hey, hey! This isn’t right at all!
ESPEON: True, but have we stuck to the scrip very well so far?
UMBREON: Uh, I guess not.
ESPEON: And on that note I’d just like to say… a Psychic just beat a Dark about something! Hah!

Guess what we’re going to do now? That’s right! Time jump back to when this wasn’t so silly!

UMBREON: Hah, like that’ll ever happen!

Time Jump! Whiz-bang~

TRUDLY: He’s a part of Team Snagem!
RUI: Yes, I know. We’ve discussed this issue already, plus the fact I don’t seem to care either way. Boy am I naïve or what? Anyway (Points) let us past.
FOLLY: Fine, fine. Come on Trudly, let’s get ourselves caught by that police guy Sherles so we can stay away from this nut job (points at Wes)

Wes looks up with his only ‘friends’, a group of loveable sentient mice.

RUI: (Puts down mousetraps)
MICE: (Gasp, choke, die)
WES: Noooo!

I’d say Rui is a tad violent but then she’d hurt me, so we’ll just jump on ahead to the Mayor’s house again. Some funky music to the degree that it borders on complete overkill starts. Wes and Rui walk in and Wes trips up over something.

RUI: Why is Es Cade on the floor?
MIROR B: He ate a holiday ham while you were gone and he’s sleeping it off.
RUI: Ah.

This plot is seriously messed up so we’ll say goodbye to the Colosseum crew until next time.

UMBREON: It’s not goodbye. After all, this franchise is going to go on forever.

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Love Umbreon’s finishing line XD

Shameful pilfering from Monty Python this chapter… and others actually. My favourite chapter is up next, yay!

Ugh! Had to get that nasty chappie out of the way ¬¬

The Big Al
3rd November 2005, 12:38 PM
XD
My Spleen is calling hurting after reading this. Tell me, will you have time jumps when things get out of hand in the future?

Yoru Ryu
3rd November 2005, 4:16 PM
XD
My Spleen is calling hurting after reading this. Tell me, will you have time jumps when things get out of hand in the future?

Things WILL get out of hand in the future :P But it won't always be time jumps that get everything back on track; we have other people butting in, adverts from other characters and the likes. It's very random. Thanks!

Angel-FoX-crescent
3rd November 2005, 5:25 PM
Aww...poor Umbreon.

katiekitten
3rd November 2005, 6:23 PM
A very funny second chapter. I like Umbreon and Espeons personalities, they help add to the story. Well done! :)

Sike Saner
3rd November 2005, 8:44 PM
Highlights, dangit:


They all walk in the mayors office. It’s not like you have much choice anyway when Rui’s practically on top of you.

*snort* Too true…but then you just had to add the bonus of immediately following it with this:


That sounded so wrong.

You rock. ^_^


EVICE: I mean, uh, good morning?
RUI: Hey! We aren’t meant to know who you are!
ES CADE: Better?


RUI: It’s your line you great turnip!

XP He can only be imagined as an actual fricking TURNIP from now on...


ES CADE: Go to the Colosseum! It’s what the game is named after.

My cousin needs to read this. Desperately. Lines like that kill her. XD


PDA WOMAN: Pyrite Colosseum have launched an attack on our trainer thing.
JUSTY: (Weeps) No one knows the name of this trainer thing I run!


Justy and the PDA woman run over to a control panel of sorts. But since this is Colosseum when they run their legs move faster than the area they cover while at the ‘run’.


No matter what option you choose when Rui asks you if it’s true she still doesn’t seem to mind so…


Wes looks up with his only ‘friends’, a group of loveable sentient mice.

^ *hugs you for referencing that*

Yes, this is definitely better now, and it was quite boss to begin with.

I still think Miror B. is more of the type to have a Weatherby, though. :p

~*Ratiosu*~
3rd November 2005, 9:02 PM
O...M....G....my spleen is hurting too! Funniest part: when Rui says a guy crushed him mistaking him as a lampost and crushed him, and a drunken guy dressed as Father Christmas crushed him when he was reviwng his Christmas list...LOL.

Alto (the Latios) : WHY DO YOU KEEP PUTTING THE LATIOS AFTER MY NAME?
X: I gotta go pee! BAD! *meets up with Wes in the young trainer's bathroom even though she's female* YO! WHAT UP?
Alto: I wish I knew what was going on in there...wait! I can turn invisible! *does so and flies in*
Wes: *sounds of peeing are heard* Who's there? Is it that voice again? Go away voice!
X: Oh, so you want me to get out of here WHILE PEEING?
Wes: Oh, you're not the voice. Thank goodness...
Alto: ---

Alto: That was senseless...if I don't say anything you have to not put it there!
X: *with earplugs* Whatever...

Wondrous Sableye
3rd November 2005, 10:29 PM
*snerk* I just can not keep a straight face at all with this…Heh.

Love the Gonzap the Constipated joke, and I never would've figured Miror B for a snubbeh person…or…rich, either, for that matter…O_O; Jeeves was strange.

Is it me, or does Wes seem to have a bit of a Gollum-Smeagol-esque case of D.I.D.? XD

Yoru Ryu
4th November 2005, 12:54 PM
Aww...poor Umbreon.

Why Umbreon? It should be poor Justy... or poor Rui; she's surrounded by idiots. Unless that's what ya meant by Umbreon XD


A very funny second chapter. I like Umbreon and Espeons personalities, they help add to the story. Well done!

I'm glad people can see the Eons' personalities and not that it's just a random character who get's to say something stupid -^^- Thanks!


XP He can only be imagined as an actual fricking TURNIP from now on...

*gigglesnort* And turnip is just such a funny word too. Turnip, yeah, makes me smile :D


Yes, this is definitely better now, and it was quite boss to begin with.

I still think Miror B. is more of the type to have a Weatherby, though.

Had to add another scene in. It was just too short before >.<

Drat! I should've changed it to Weatherby in this version XD Still love the name Jeeves though.

Thanks ^.^


O...M....G....my spleen is hurting too! Funniest part: when Rui says a guy crushed him mistaking him as a lampost and crushed him, and a drunken guy dressed as Father Christmas crushed him when he was reviwng his Christmas list...LOL.

Alto (the Latios) : WHY DO YOU KEEP PUTTING THE LATIOS AFTER MY NAME?
X: I gotta go pee! BAD! *meets up with Wes in the young trainer's bathroom even though she's female* YO! WHAT UP?
Alto: I wish I knew what was going on in there...wait! I can turn invisible! *does so and flies in*
Wes: *sounds of peeing are heard* Who's there? Is it that voice again? Go away voice!
X: Oh, so you want me to get out of here WHILE PEEING?
Wes: Oh, you're not the voice. Thank goodness...
Alto: ---

Alto: That was senseless...if I don't say anything you have to not put it there!
X: *with earplugs* Whatever...

It's nice to know someone liked the "Wes getting crushed by fat guys" bit. I wasn't sure if was just too random... not like this whole thing isn't crazy anyway but hey! Nevermind :D

XD It's a Uni-sex bathroom ^_~


*snerk* I just can not keep a straight face at all with this…Heh.

Love the Gonzap the Constipated joke, and I never would've figured Miror B for a snubbeh person…or…rich, either, for that matter…O_O; Jeeves was strange.

Is it me, or does Wes seem to have a bit of a Gollum-Smeagol-esque case of D.I.D.? XD

Of course Miror.B is a snob! XD He's just the way he is when the camera is on him... gets a serious case of... limelight o_O Yeah, i didn't know how to finish that then XD Thanks for reading!

Guitar dude bill
4th November 2005, 6:38 PM
this is not funny, this is not hilarious. this is histerical. i have never read a fan-fic so histerical. i'M Afraid of fat guys. too histerical. but you triple posted earlier

Angel-FoX-crescent
4th November 2005, 7:00 PM
[QUOTE=Yoru Ryu]Why Umbreon? It should be poor Justy... or poor Rui; she's surrounded by idiots. Unless that's what ya meant by Umbreon XD

Oh okay if was I Rui *surrounded by idiots* I'm gonna run like hell lol.

Yoru Ryu
4th November 2005, 9:18 PM
this is not funny, this is not hilarious. this is histerical. i have never read a fan-fic so histerical. i'M Afraid of fat guys. too histerical. but you triple posted earlier

Triple posted? What thread have you been in? o__O

Guitar dude bill
5th November 2005, 1:09 PM
Triple posted? What thread have you been in? o__O
i apolagize. it turned out it was someone who posted after you with a similar avatar. this was my mistake

Yoru Ryu
5th November 2005, 4:49 PM
Haha, that's alright. Whenever i see the old avatar i used to use i think i made that post till i actually realise XD

Silver Ryu
5th November 2005, 7:42 PM
Bwahahahhahahaha! This is great! The whole "Gonzap the Constipated" thing is funny, as is making Wes really stupid and Rui....well, kinda crazy. I'll definately be following this fic.

Nylf
5th November 2005, 9:04 PM
AWESOME, love the personalities, though I can't shake the feeling that me and Umbreon are one and the same? Ah well, stupidly funny, especially the part where you take the mick out of Miror B. I couldn't tell if it was a he till someone called him in the third person.

Joe Vega #4
5th November 2005, 9:30 PM
RUI: Aw, what’s the matter?
WES: Fat people scare me…
RUI: Really?
UMBREON: It’s true.
ESPEON: Yup! When he was smaller some fat guy mistook him for a lamppost and crushed him when he leaned on him.
UMBREON: It’s the skinny factor… he was even offered a spot as a supermodel.
Fat people scaring Wes... strange. I mean, he's so happy in the game, and there are no scared faces.


RUI: (Grabs Justy) Look you idiot! I am not just some n00b with the attention span of a plastic spoon! I am a professional Pokemon character and if you don’t tell me where I can find a toilet for my friend I’m gonna pummel that jacket right off of you so the only way you’ll be able to eat is through a straw!
JUSTY: Squeak!
Ya gotta love Rui, making a stand for Pokemon RPG heroes everywhere.


RUI: WHAT!? (Turns to Wes) How could you!? (Slaps him) And to think I was going to let you get to second base!
WES: Aw, but I don’t like sports…
RUI: (Slaps him again) We were going to get married!
WES: (Starts)
RUI: Have lots and lots of children!
WES: (Squeaks) Lots…?
RUI: (Grabs Wes’s hair) About fifteen!
WES: Fifteen!

A long silent pause carries on. The Author starts wondering if this has changed into a Silent Movie, like back in the good ol’ days.

WES: … Is that more than three?
RUI: (Hisses) Lots more. (Stands back) They’ll help out on the farm… in Johto… just outside Goldenrod city… where we can help other underprivileged children have a better life… by using them as cheap labour… slave labour…
Ah, childbirth, such a sick thing to go through.


Wes looks up with his only ‘friends’, a group of loveable sentient mice.

RUI: (Puts down mousetraps)
MICE: (Gasp, choke, die)
WES: Noooo!

Gasp, choke, DIE...

NEO GOHAN
6th November 2005, 1:20 AM
I just realized, all the funny things in life involve stupid males(guys, don't take offense, I'm one of 'em):
Billy and Mandy->Billy
Ed, Edd, and Eddy->Ed
MPatHG->some of those knights, especially the 'intelligent' one
Weird Al Yankovic->just about everyone involved
Simpsons->Homer(mmm... pointy...)
and now Wes joins the evergrowing club! STUPID MALES PWN ALL!... except Bush... he's just too good at it for my tastes... XP
EDIT: Now I just realized(wow, I really AM stupid) that Wes had a Gollum moment in the first chapter.

WES: Preccccciouuussssss…
UMBREON: Um.
I have NO clue why, but I always find myself quoting Gollum... especially his trademark growl/hiss... Now I just remembered, I forgot to add him and Pippin up there... GAAAHHH!!!

Yoru Ryu
7th November 2005, 2:29 PM
Heheh, thanks foe ze comments, people. Nice to see this can gain a smile -^^- Anyway, Chapter three now.

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: More frustration this chapter. and i wrote this about a month or so ago soooo…


Pokemon Colosseum
(Nicknames from Disco Stu)

Act 3
Scene: My hovercraft is full of eels!

In the Mayor’s house. Some funky music to the degree that it borders on complete overkill starts.

WES: Hey, it’s Saturday Night Foetus!
UMBREON: Fever!
ESPEON: What’s this? His first line and he’s already made a fool of himself?
UMBREON: You do like to state the obvious, don’t you?
ESPEON: (Eyes well up, sniffles) Yeah… I-it’s all I’m good for.

You can say that again! You faint at the slightest attack.

UMBREON: Haha!

Oh, and you’re no better! It take about five attacks from you to down a Bellosom.

ESPEON: Haha, face!
UMBREON: Gr! (Bites Espeon)
ESPEON: (Faints)

Rui watches the purple body hit the floor before slowly looking to Wes.

RUI: Okay, I’ll save the plot.
UMBREON: More like change it. Disco Stu shouldn’t even be here!
RUI: (To Wes) I can see Dead People.
WES: WHAT!?
RUI: (Shakes head) I mean Shadow Pokemon! I can see Shadow Pokemon!
UMBREON: (Growls) I know where you live… The call is coming from inside the house… (Impersonates the “Psycho” horror music)
WES: I can see Pokemon too (Grins)
RUI: No you moron! I can see Shadow Pokemon.
WES: So can that visor in Colosseum XD… what?
RUI: Do. Not. Talk. About. XD.
WES: Eh?
RUI: Don’t you find it insulting that they completely forgot about us?
UMBREON: Well, the author can’t get Colosseum XD yet…

Roll on November, England. Roll on November.

UMBREON: So she knows sod all about it!
RUI: Good! Its and evil creation with a little boy who looks like the male version of me.
WES: (Holds hand to forehead and faints at the horror of a male Rui) Ooohhh…

Whoo, yeah! Let’s Ship Wes and Michael together… HeroColosseumShipping… or maybe not.

RUI: Anyway! I can see Shadow Pokemon…
MIROR. B: I’m not surprised you can! With eyes that big…
RUI: And you have to battle those two freaks to Snag Makuhita.
FOLLY AND TRUDLY: Freaks? That little girl is so rude.
WES: Aww, but I don’t like Makuhitas. I like Feebas’.

Why?

WES: It’s my life in Pokemon form! An ugly, hideous, revolting, repulsive, horrid, unsightly, unpleasant, dreadful --
RANDOM FEEBAS: Hey, hey! Shut up would ya?
WES: -- Disgusting looking Pokemon that evolves into a, like, pretty… Pokemon… yeah… pretty. (Swoons and fans himself)
MIROR.B: (Pops a vein) Will you be quiet! I can’t hear my theme music.
RUI: I was just talking with my partner!
WES: Wow! You’re married?
FOLLY: Well, that’s a kick in the teeth for Colosseum Shippers then.

Somewhere at home the Author is crying.

YORU: Actually. I’ll get around that. Director… Cut!
MIROR.B: (Pops a vein) Do you mind? I can’t here my music.
RUI: Don’t you “Do you mind” me! I was talking to Wes!

Better! Happy now.

MIROR.B: Well, go and talk to him somewhere else; I can’t hear a bloody thing.
RUI: Don’t you swear at me!
MIROR.B: I was only telling you to shut up so I can hear the music. Big Eyes.
WES: Don’t call Rudy--
UMBREON: Rui
WES: -- Rui “Big Eyes” mister.
MIROR B: Or you’ll do what?
WES: Er… this…!

Wes runs around in circles hopping over Es Cade’s prone form and singing the theme tune of Beverly Hills Cops.

TRUDLY: What jus’ happened, boss?
MIROR.B: I don’t know… I was too busy talking to Big Eyes.
RUI: Rrrrrrgh!
UMBREON: Sometimes I wonder what I did to belong to this nutcase…

The black dog chases after his trainer… and I use the term trainer very loosely… nipping at his ankles to try and stop him. Eventually, and after using some nifty Matrix style moves, Umbreon tackles Wes into the bookcase he’d otherwise probably hit if Makuhita punched him instead. The bookcase falls on him… hahah.

MIROR.B: (To Rui) See, if you hadn’t have been going on we’d have heard that, Big Eyes.
RUI: Hey, say that once more and I’ll smash your bloody face in!
MIROR.B: Aw, shut up, Big Eyes.
WES: (From under the bookcase) Leaver her alone…
MIROR.B: Oh, you’re not so bad yourself, Streakface. Did you fall asleep on a Football pitch?
RUI: I’m gonna thump you so hard if you don’t shut up!
MIROR. B: Where are you two from? Freak city?
RUI: Growl, snarl.

Hey, hey, hey, lets not hit anyone… we have to keep this at the same censoring, thanks.

RUI: I’ll smack him if he calls me Big Eyes again. (Points and Miror.B) I’ll take you to the cleaners!
MIROR.B: Listen, I’m only telling the truth. You do have very big eyes.
RUI: You’re gonna be the most sought after Panda in China when I’m done with you!
MIROR.B: You wouldn’t hit a gentleman in glasses would you?
RUI: You’re not wearing glasses.

Yeah, I think Wes still has them.

MIROR.B: Excuse me? Streakface and Big Eyes have my spectacles?
RUI: Right! That’s it! I’m warning you!
MIROR.B: You’re just full of threats aren’t you?
RUI: Oi! I’ll take you on. C’mon! I challenge you to a bout of Fist-e-cuffs (Hops back and forth)

Yeah, I don’t know how to spell that… yeah? Oh yeah? It IS wrong is it? Well, well… Eat Me! Humph.

MIROR.B: Fine, I accept your challenge! (Throws a Pokeball that nails Umbreon between the eyes)
UMBREON: Ugh! (Faints)

A Makuhita appears from the ball and performs a double back flip, parries with an uppercut, follows it up with two other… fancy fighting moves… does this other thing… kicks Trudly in the crotch, jumps in the air… makes some origami, impersonates the Statue of Liberty pose and lands with a curtsey.

MAKUHITA: God, I miss my circus days…
FOLLY: Um, isn’t that my Pokemon to use? Or, was it Trudly’s?
TRUDLY: (Curled up in a foetal position on the floor) The pain!
RUI: Hey, I’m not fighting that!
MIROR.B: But Makuhita is basically and extension of myself. Look at his beautiful yellow suit (Squeals)
RUI: I think that’s his skin.
MAKUHITA: I’m a girl, people.

Wow! That’s rare. I hardly ever get a female one.

RUI: (Rubs chin) Hmmm, I’m not too fond of Makuhitas either.
MAKUHITA: Hey!
RUI: Oh well, we’ll snag it anyway, purify it, then leave it to rot in the Pokemon Storage Box.

We’ll build my team! Umbreon, Espeon, Meganium, Ampharos, Flygon and Suicune!

MIROR.B: What an imaginative team.
RUI: Nooo! We’ll get Entei instead of Meganium.
FOLLY: I like Quagsire.
RUI: Ledyba isn’t bad either.
FOLLY: How about Ursaring?

Ey! This isn’t “Rate My Team”! You’re making my head hurt.

RUI: (Looks up at Miror.B) If we give you your glasses back will you let us go?
MIROR.B: I suppose so. (Mumbles) Nascour’s gonna beat me for this…

Rui nods and climbs over the to the bookcase and cranes it back against the wall with no effort what-so-ever!

FOLLY: Hot dog you’re strong little missy!
RUI: Are you okay, Wes?
WES: Cranberries!
RUI: (Sighs) Yeah, he’s okay. Ahem, Wes, do you have this man’s glasses?
WES: Um, I have some Purple Sparkly Glasses! But they’re my precioussssss.

Miror.B jumps forward.

MIROR.B: Purple Sparkly Glasses? They’re mine, gimme!
RUI: Ah, ah, ah. Ask nice!
MIROR.B: Sod that, Big Eyes, just return my glasses.
RUI: (Howls) Big Eyes?

Suddenly Rui turns a shade of green and grows bulging muscles and height.

WES: Ew, Rui?
RUI: (Grabs Wes and holds him upside down) Give glasses. Give me!
WES: Whoa, gnarly. I’m walking on the ceiling (Giggles)

After much shaking and prodding of Wes the Purple Sparkly Glasses fall from his pocket. Rui drops Wes.

WES: I’ve been violated (Whimpers)
MIROR.B: My glasses!
RUI: (Uses her MIGHTY foot to stomp on them)
MIROR.B: NOOOOoooo…! Oh the horror! The pain! The searing pain of loss! It stabs at my heart and gnaws on my consciousness. Doesn’t it just pull at your heartstrings? They had been passes down from my Diva mother! If I ever fathered children I’d be obligated to pass them down the line again! Oh, the history behind those glasses and now, now! Nooooooo… oh (Stands up, pulls another pair from his pocket and puts them on) Well, come on, Folly, Trudly. (Leaves)
RUI: I’m not done with you yet! (Stomps out after Miror.B)
WES: Wait for me Big Eyes-I mean-Rui!

With everyone gone Espeon regains his senses.

ESPEON: Hello? Anyone here? (Scratches head) Where is everyone?

Espeon wanders further into the Mayor’s lair… I mean house! House. Along the way he grabs an axe from a handy axe collection the mayor seems to questioningly have in the house. After a while he starts getting a crazed look on his face.

ESPEON: (Chops through a door) Heeeeeere's Johnny!

The room is empty.

ESPEON: D’oh!

He wanders around in the hallways of the house. That strange woman that seriously cannot be Es Cade’s wife opens a door to some random room I’m not going to explain and a river of blood comes rushing out. Nope, not explaining that either.

ESPEON: Hm, that’s weird. I predicted the blood should come out on the second floor.

He chops through another door… leading into a bedroom, maybe? Is it really that important?

ES CADE: Hey David it’s me, Grandpa!
ESPEON: ARG! (Looks around) Drat, back here again! Well, still, where is everyone?
MAKUHITA: (Across the room) Hello, Joe.
ESPEON: (Uses Confusion)
MAKUHITA: Oh god, it tickles! (Giggles and laughs itself into Fainting)
ESPEON: Ha! See, I can… battle… hey! God, where is everyone? (Looks around) Oh it’s just typical isn’t it? I actually do something and no one’s around to pay creed… God damn it! I hate this place…

Espeon grabs Makuhita with his l33t psychic powahas and drags it out the door after his comrades.

MAKUHITA: What about Umbreon?
ESPEON: Nah, leave him.
MAKUHITA: I’m so confused…

And that, ladies and gentlemen, was the ‘Pokemon battle for Makuhita‘!

Now go clean your eyes out. Quick!

Outside.

WES: Hey! It’s a Tellietubbie!
BLUNO: The names Bluno… Streakface…

And the moral of this chapter is… never leave your Espeon alone… or, beware of super sized, afro wearing, clog dancing, Purple Spakly Glassess loving Cipher Admins.

River dances off.

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Gah! It's still too short! It'd probably be longer if i seperated each person's text but it looks more messy that way, hm.

How DO you spell fist-e-cuffs anyway? That can’t be right o__O

Wondrous Sableye
7th November 2005, 8:31 PM
There's one thing that confused me about this…Miror B doesn't have purple glasses… They're, like…gold, and…stuff…

And the word you were looking for about halfway through was "fisticuffs."

~*Ratiosu*~
8th November 2005, 1:07 AM
They're silverish...O-O here's a picture of him in XD (Wes: AHH! XD! IT BURNS!)

http://media.nintendo.com/mediaFiles/76b87633-6196-4b1c-835f-fed393baeea2.jpg

Good chapter! I laughed so hard with the cranberries part and "But they're my precious..." part. I haven't even watched Lord of the Rings or whatever movie that Gollum guy is from, but I do it perfectly. I saw it on commercial O-O

ALTO (the Latios) : There ya go again!
X: *earplugs still in* I can't hear you! *sing-song*

The Big Al
8th November 2005, 1:45 AM
That was so funny I couldn't stop laughing. I mean, it's the most insane story I've ever read. I especially loved Rui Hulk shaking the glasses out of Wes.

Sike Saner
8th November 2005, 3:58 AM
Highlights:


WES: It’s my life in Pokemon form! An ugly, hideous, revolting, repulsive, horrid, unsightly, unpleasant, dreadful --
RANDOM FEEBAS: Hey, hey! Shut up would ya?

Boss. :)


MIROR.B: Oh, you’re not so bad yourself, Streakface. Did you fall asleep on a Football pitch?
RUI: I’m gonna thump you so hard if you don’t shut up!

Hey, Rui, that's my line! (Makes no difference whether or not he shuts up, though. ;) )


kicks Trudly in the crotch

*sings* Crotch-kicking, crotch-crotch-kicking... :p You know I love it.


MIROR.B: I suppose so. (Mumbles) Nascour’s gonna beat me for this…

I PICTURE THAT ALL TOO EASILY. XP


MIROR.B: NOOOOoooo…! Oh the horror! The pain! The searing pain of loss! It stabs at my heart and gnaws on my consciousness. Doesn’t it just pull at your heartstrings? They had been passes down from my Diva mother! If I ever fathered children I’d be obligated to pass them down the line again! Oh, the history behind those glasses and now, now! Nooooooo… oh (Stands up, pulls another pair from his pocket and puts them on) Well, come on, Folly, Trudly. (Leaves)

That is my favorite moment thus far! *hugs Miror B., then hugs you...then hugs Miror B. again*


ESPEON: (Chops through a door) Heeeeeere's Johnny!

The room is empty.

ESPEON: D’oh!

*hugs you again for referencing that*

Well, as you can imagine, I adore this chapter...due to the prominent presence of HIM. *hugs Miror B. ENTIRELY TOO HARD* ...Oh, ****! MEDIC!!

Yoru Ryu
8th November 2005, 11:21 AM
Hmm, in Colosseum i think his glassess have purple lenses with a gold frame... well at least i do them like that in all my fanart ;P Thanks people!

I think chapter five is going to be longer since it's not a recycled chapter like 1-4 are... even though four isn't up here yet. I have about three pages of speech written down so far for chapter 5 and all it needs is the random magic i use to connect it all together XD

Yami Ryu
8th November 2005, 11:40 AM
Oh mi god

THIS WAS SO FUNNY XD, oh man, my fave part, in act two was the revelation of Wes being a former Snagem member. Oh man, fifteen kids XD I think Wes would die if he tried to count above four XD


A Makuhita appears from the ball and performs a double back flip, parries with an uppercut, follows it up with two other… fancy fighting moves… does this other thing… kicks Trudly in the crotch, jumps in the air… makes some origami, impersonates the Statue of Liberty pose and lands with a curtsey.

I almost fell out of my ****ing chair at this paragraph XD oh god, I can barely wait for act 4 XD

Yoru Ryu
12th November 2005, 7:17 PM
It's kinda sad how few people liked this game *sigh*

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^



Pokemon Colosseum
What’s that Pokemon?

Act 4
Scene: Beaches, palm trees… bam bum.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, was the ‘Pokemon battle for Makuhita‘!

Now go clean your eyes out. Quick!

Outside.

WES: Hey! It’s a Tellietubbie!
BLUNO: The names Bluno… Streakface…

Wes walks over to the odd blue-clad-man and sits down in front of him staring at his stomach.

BLUNO: Er, um… er…

After a couple of minutes Wes crawls over to the man and grabs his sides still staring at the enchanting stomach.

WES: (Looks up at Bluno) Why won’t it work, Tonkey Wonky?
BLUNO: Wha-what? Hey, g-get off me…!
WES: Maybe the reception is out, hmmmm.

He reaches up and twists the “Tuning notches”.

BLUNO: Ow! (Jumps back) Bloody Nipple Twisters…
WES: (Stands up) I want to watch Tubbie Telly!
BLUNO: Ah, go away, Freak Bag!

Wes jumps on the man and hits his head with his fist to try and ‘fix’ the TV reception… you know, when you get annoyed and hit the top of the TV in a fit and start screaming and swearing… or is that just me? Oh well, that’s what Wes is doing now anyway. Leave me alone!

RUI: (Across the street) Wes! Stop molesting people! For God’s sake…
WES: Again, again!

Rui dashes over.

WES: Ahh, cooties! (Points at Rui’s mouth)
RUI: (Groans) Oh what is it now?
WES: You have cooootieeees, ewwwwwie!!
RUI: …?
BLUNO: Um, you have a little… green… (Motions to mouth)
RUI: (Rubs mouth) I don’t know how The Hulk keeps clean. Thanks, strange… blue… guy…

Oi! We have another Pokemon battle to do here people!

WES: The voices, the voices!
BLUNO: Oh yeah! My Croconaw will pummel you into the ground.
RUI: Even though it has no special status on it’s side? Quilava can burn you and Bayleaf can heal itself while your Croconaw can’t do anything special.
BLUNO: (Sniffles) You’re so mean.

Wow, Rui can really make people cry.

BLUNO: (Wipes nose on sleeve)
WES: Eugh.
BLUNO: Now we’ll battle!
WES: But, but I don’t have any Pokemon.
RUI: Oh not this again… Wes! You have an Espeon and Umbreon! Two of the most sought after Eeveeloutions! (Throws arms in the air) I mean come on! Eevee’s are rare enough as it is in the Pokemon world let alone here in Orre. The only place Eevees are in abundance are Mary-Sue fanfics where they are the most powerful of ALL the ’loutions, not to mention the fact they’re too friggin’ adorable for words with darling little voices. I wouldn’t be surprised if an Eevee could beat Mewtwo in some of these hogwash fics! Wes! You have two Pokemon!
BLUNO: Meep!
WES: (Stands there) No… I don’t… at least, I don’t think I do… and I don’t like thinking…

He really doesn’t.

RUI: Eh?

I don’t know where they’ve gone.

RUI: Well, go find them! I don’t want to be stuck here for all eternity.

Here, we’ll let the audience find them. Ahem, we’ll go for a tour around Phenic City and you can shout out where ever you think Umbreon and Espeon are hiding. Just follow the simple instructions.

:Entering Interactive Mode:

Press the Red Button on your remote control to stop the camera, and feel free to shout out where you think the Eons are hiding.

YORU: So here we go with; “Find The Eons!”
WES: (Grins) Fun!
RUI: I think I’m going to cry…

The camera starts slowly moving around the City of Water. Someone in the audience stops the camera.

AUDIENCE MEMBER: In the fountain!

The camera moves on indicating the guess was wrong. It stops again.

SOMEONE ELSE: In the Trainer Thing with What’s-His-Name!

Again the camera moves on. Poor Justy; no one knows his name.

MAN IN AUDIENCE: (Presses Button) Dash stole them!
ANOTHER GUY: Yeah! Check his trousers!
SOME GIRL: His Castform ate them!
THAT GUY AGAIN: Look in his Bum-Bag!
YOU: No! Dash ate them!
ANOTHER LASS: Have you checked the draws in the bureau?
A BLOKE: What is the average speed velocity of an un-laden Sparrow?

Some weirdo in blue jumps in front of the camera.

BLUNO: It doesn’t matter! With no Pokemon my Croconaw will crush them, ahaha! (Grabs a Pokeball) Go, Croconaw!

A figure jumps forward from the ball and tosses it’s head about. The sudden smell of a fresh green meadow fills the air… what? That can’t be right…

CROCONAW: Bayleef! Bay, bay!

A moment of stupor silence.

RUI: Um, that’s a Bayleef.
WES: …!
CROCONAW: Bay?
WES: …!

Bluno runs over to his ‘Croconaw’.

BLUNO: No, it’s a Croconaw.
RUI: It’s not a Croconaw! It’s a Bayleef!
BLUNO: He’s a Croconaw!
RUI: (Scratches head) Looks like a Bayleef though…
BLUNO: He’s just a little deformed.
RUI: Looks a lot deformed!
BLUNO: Yes, he’s so severely deformed, in fact, that he looks a little bit like a Bayleef.
Rui: Looks a lot like a Bayleef!
BLUNO: Heheh, yeah (Pets Croconaw) It has been remarked upon. Just as Nascour is known as the “Leader of Cipher“, Sunshine here, is know as the “Bayleef Croconaw”.
RUI: Sunshine? Funny name for a Croconaw…

Bluno jumps up.

BLUNO: Haha, and that’s where I had you fooled! For It’s not a Croconaw; it’s a Bayleef!
RUI: Ar!
BLUNO: Ahahaha! Had enough or do you want to more?

Suddenly a bright red flash occurs from behind and Rui and Bluno look over to Wes who is standing in the spot the Croconaw was standing.

WES: (Eyes well up) I-I was just playing, playing catch with Croconaw with this red and white ball I found… and then he was gone! (Wails)
BLUNO: You idiot! You just Snagged my Croconaw!
RUI: I thought it was a Bayleef?
BLUNO: It’s a Croconaw.

WAIT! What the-? Wes jus Snagged a Pokemon? Quick, check to see if Hell froze over!

Suddenly the camera goes haywire and spins around in circles. Everyone runs around in well choreographed panic as the screen blurs and the colours mix. With a little jolt Wes and Rui and Espeon, Umbreon and Makuhita land at the entrance of Pyrite Town.

UMBREON: What the hell just happened?
YOU: Well, you where taking so long I just thought I’d help move things along.
RUI: But how?
YOU: We’re still in Interactive mode.
YORU: What? Hey, get out of here and back to your seat!

As you trudge back to your seat the camera is taken out of Interactive mode.

CAIL: Heyo! I’m Cail, welcome to Pyrite; the arse of Orre.
ESPEON: So full of pride with your home aren’t you?
CAIL: State the obvious why don’t you?
ESPEON: It’s what I’m here for. So, Is there some other place you’d rather be than here?
CAIL: Yeah. How about on an emergency runway… in Bosnia… in winter… that’s covered in crap.

Cail walks off grumbling.

RUI: Ah well, lets go see the police and report something.

Walking past a sulking Cail, Rui and Wes and the Pokemon waltz into the police station. After standing in silence for, say, five minutes, a young officer comes in and crashes into Wes.

WES: Woof!
JOHNSON: Oh, I’m terribly sorry Sherles! I just caught Cail disrespecting Pyrite again.
RUI: This is Wes.
JOHNSON: (Still to Wes) What shall we do, Sherles?
WES: Umbreon’s nose it wet! (Grins)
UMBREON: …
SHERLES: I’m over here, Johnson.

The clumsy officer looks over to his superior.

JOHNSON: (Points at Sherles) Impostor!
SHERLES: What?
JOHNSON: How dare you try to take the place of our dear Police Chief, impostor! (Grabs Wes) Come, we must flee this land to safer ground, Master! We shall touch the horizon in our fight for right! No stone we shall leave unturned in our never ending search for the human scum polluting our world. But no! I cannot accept you to come along on this perilous quest for you may become tired and weak; maybe even injured! No! No, I will continue with our trial on my own! (Kisses Wes) Farewell sweet thee, I hardly knew thou!

Johnson runs out of the station wailing and tossing his arms about over his head.

UMBREON: What an eccentric performance.
WES: Wow! My first ever kiss. Bleah, bleah!
SHERLES: Uh, I’m very sorry about Johnson, young man.
RUI: Nah, Wes is used to men hitting on him.

God, who wouldn’t want to hit on Wes… I sure would, ha!

SHERLES: Oh? You’re named Wes, young man? That’s strange because these two gentlemen just came by here asking to be locked away from the… “nutbag known as Wes”. Is that you?
WES: Who wants to know?
SHERLES: I do.
WES: Oh. Then yes I am… I haven’t checked the name in my underwear today but I’m pretty sure I am.
SHERLES: They’re ‘round back.
RUI: What? You’re just gonna let us walk up to hardened criminals?
SHERLES: Sure, why not.

They’re behind bars.

UMBREON: Yeah, and we all know how that turns out.
WES: What, what? I don’t get it.
ESPEON: That’s no surprise.

So, after taking some time out of their ‘busy schedule’ to harass Trudly and Folly in their cell and to let Makuhita take another shot in the Crotch Arena the group leave to the rough and tumble streets of Pyrite town not unlike the stereotypical Ghetto back-streets… only this isn’t a back street but a whole town… only to end up at Dukings place who strangely has a lot of children in the building. Did you say all that without taking a breath like the lack of grammar dictates?

DUKING: Ah young laddeh! What can a de for yer?

And Duking has a crappy Scottish accent that the Author can’t portray well even though she has a Scottish first name, and goes to Scotland once a year on holiday and from taking reference from that Scottish bloke in Golden Sun. Haha, just wait till the character with a British accent comes up then we can all have a laugh!

RUI: Why do you have loads of kids in your house?
DUKING: Oh, er… no reason (Shifty eyes)
UMBREON: And so close to the Police Station too…
DUKING: Scotland Yhard dehne ’ave nothin’ on meh.
ESPEON: God I wish you’d just speak English.

Suddenly a little girl comes up behind Duking and put some earmuffs on him. Pink fluffy ones if you were wondering.

MARCIA: All clear!

As Duking continues to talk like nothing has happened to him a bookcase to the left of the camera shifts and moves to allow a small boy into the room.

UMBREON: Oh come on! That’s the oldest one in The Book.
ESPEON: And The Book must be pretty old…
SECC: Oh I’m sorry. Papa here can’t know.
UMBREON: Hey, if your dad has a Scottish accent how come you don’t?

Because I’m not writing it for someone else!

RUI: Is he even your dad? What about Marcia?
SECC: Er… dunno really.

I haven’t played Colosseum in a while. I haven’t got anymore memory cards left for another file.

ESPEON: And they cost about &#163;20.
RUI: Who are you anyway?

Marcia and Secc strike a pose.

SECC: We’re the Kid’s Grit!
RUI: Oh… aren’t you supposed to be the Kids Grid?
MARCIA: No! We’re fighting for the right to have more grit on the roads and in the playgrounds. You look like an intelligent man (Hands Wes a leaflet)
WES: (Makes a paper airplane)
MARCIA: Growl.
SECC: Haven’t you noticed the lack of grit on the roads in winter? It’s a hazard in snowy weather!
MARCIA: And the lack of grit in playgrounds? It’s dangerous for children if they fall off a swing. Benny lost a whole arm that way!

A little kid with only one arm limps out of the bookcase-whole-thing. He waits for the audience to “Awwww” at him…

AUDIENCE: (Filing nails, whistling)

He throws his crutch to the floor in a huff, as a paper airplane lands in his hair, and stomps back through the hole.

SECC: We only bring him out in emergencies.

The two children walk back towards their hideout.

MARCIA: Vote yes on Proposition 42!
RUI: Hey wait! (Looks around) … God damnit! Am I the only sane person around here?
WES: Hey look Rui! If I close my eyes everything goes dark (Laughs)
RUI: Please just… please.
DUKING:… she caneh take no more cap’n! (Waves hands about)
RUI: Oh forget this! Let’s just go to the Colosseum.

Yes, we’ll do the Plusle bit next chapter.

RUI: If I die in my sleep leave me be.
UMBREON: Oh stop complaining! You’ve only been with him for four chapters; I’ve been with him my whole life! Heh, try doing THAT why dont’cha!
ESPEON: I have too… but I sleep a lot.

^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Can ya tell which pokemon the Croconaw/Bayleaf actually is? ;D

Yes, and i know Snag Balls don't look the same as normal Pokeballs but it wouldn't be as obvious if i'd used the correct colours.

And i really didn't have anything else to add into the chapter from the original >_<

Yami Ryu
12th November 2005, 7:26 PM
;; I wanna play the game, but I can't play that much cause the music makes me pass out

._. really it does.

ANYWAYS I KNOW WHAT SUNSHINE IS! SUNSHINE IS A QUILAVA! *hit*

and as before, it was another awesome chapter, and gave me a really good laugh, which everyone needs now and then. And don't worry about anything you get wrong/think you get wrong. The only thing you have to look out for, is not a description picker, but WesxRui fans that are hard core XD beware, they tend to swarm.

Badly XD

Sike Saner
12th November 2005, 8:48 PM
The Highlights:


WES: Maybe the reception is out, hmmmm.

He reaches up and twists the “Tuning notches”.


Wes jumps on the man and hits his head with his fist to try and ‘fix’ the TV reception… you know, when you get annoyed and hit the top of the TV in a fit and start screaming and swearing… or is that just me?

Nope, sooner or later, we all resort to percussive maintenance.


RUI: (Across the street) Wes! Stop molesting people! For God’s sake…

One of those things that's funny no matter how many times you read it.


MAN IN AUDIENCE: (Presses Button) Dash stole them!
ANOTHER GUY: Yeah! Check his trousers!
SOME GIRL: His Castform ate them!
THAT GUY AGAIN: Look in his Bum-Bag!
YOU: No! Dash ate them!
ANOTHER LASS: Have you checked the draws in the bureau?
A BLOKE: What is the average speed velocity of an un-laden Sparrow?

*hugs you for the awesome reference contained therein*


CAIL: Heyo! I’m Cail, welcome to Pyrite; the arse of Orre.

"Arse of Orre" got me last time, and it got me this time, too.


So, after taking some time out of their ‘busy schedule’ to harass Trudly and Folly in their cell and to let Makuhita take another shot in the Crotch Arena

CROTCH ARENA!!! That is the best, and you know it. ^_^


DUKING: Ah young laddeh! What can a de for yer?

And Duking has a crappy Scottish accent that the Author can’t portray well even though she has a Scottish first name, and goes to Scotland once a year on holiday and from taking reference from that Scottish bloke in Golden Sun.

XD Terrific.

Barely changed, but meh, so what, since the original version was great. ^_^ Still kicking ***, and showing no signs of stopping.

Joe Vega #4
12th November 2005, 8:54 PM
He reaches up and twists the “Tuning notches”.

BLUNO: Ow! (Jumps back) Bloody Nipple Twisters…
WES: (Stands up) I want to watch Tubbie Telly!
BLUNO: Ah, go away, Freak Bag!

Wes jumps on the man and hits his head with his fist to try and ‘fix’ the TV reception… you know, when you get annoyed and hit the top of the TV in a fit and start screaming and swearing… or is that just me? Oh well, that’s what Wes is doing now anyway. Leave me alone!

RUI: (Across the street) Wes! Stop molesting people! For God’s sake…
WES: Again, again!

Wes is a... um... well, he's a toddler.

RUI: Oh not this again… Wes! You have an Espeon and Umbreon! Two of the most sought after Eeveeloutions! (Throws arms in the air) I mean come on! Eevee’s are rare enough as it is in the Pokemon world let alone here in Orre. The only place Eevees are in abundance are Mary-Sue fanfics where they are the most powerful of ALL the ’loutions, not to mention the fact they’re too friggin’ adorable for words with darling little voices. I wouldn’t be surprised if an Eevee could beat Mewtwo in some of these hogwash fics! Wes! You have two Pokemon!

Yeah!


WES: (Eyes well up) I-I was just playing, playing catch with Croconaw with this red and white ball I found… and then he was gone! (Wails)
BLUNO: You idiot! You just Snagged my Croconaw!
RUI: I thought it was a Bayleaf?
BLUNO: It’s a Croconaw.

Wow... stupidity has its benefits.

I would've nailed more quotes, had my computer started acting weird.

Yoru Ryu
12th November 2005, 9:21 PM
Renegade: Whoa, is it really that bad? I usually just play for half an' hour, get bored, leave it an hour then go back XD Hm, and I always seem to end up in a difficult fan base. Lance fans just plain scare me and ColosseumShippers are rabid 0_0 I'll have to dig out that net from under my bed now...

Sike Saner: I was SO dissapointed that i couldn't add something new in other than altering the slightest text >_< Ah well, at least the next chapter will be new to you -^^-

TDK: Heh, my computer craps out on me too... and this place keeps logging me out o__O; And stupidity does have it's ups :D

The Big Al
12th November 2005, 9:51 PM
This fan fic has to approach BoBoBo-Bobo-BoBo for complete insanity.

miken park
13th November 2005, 3:57 AM
*Snorts* My mum thought something was wrong with me, till she realisied I was laughing... At the moronicness of Wes and friends. Well done Yoru, I love homur and I love this fic. Can't wait for next chapter!


I will not buy this Tobbacanists, it is scratched!

Guitar dude bill
13th November 2005, 8:15 AM
OMG this is so fun E
especially when the random guy with one arm falls down the hole, and when bluno said, hah i fooled yah, it's not a croconaw, it's a bayleaf. this is the most funny thing on serebiiforums.com

~*Ratiosu*~
13th November 2005, 2:26 PM
So...funny...samething happened with me. My grandmom thought I was coming down with something till I read her a couple lines and then she just started laughing...she even asked "Oh who's that from" and I said "Oh it's one of my best friends on SPPf, her name's Yoru Ryu" then Mommom said "Oh is she Chinese or something" and I said "NO! That's her USERNAME, Mommom!" and she was just all "Ohh...*laughs again*"

I loved the deformed Bayleef part. And it's spelled B-A-Y-L-E-E-F. No A except for the second letter. Just thought I'd point that out, since so many people get it wrong and my sister (her fave Pokemon is Bayleef) gets ticked at people who make the mistake...good thing she wasn't around. :D

I used to play Colosseum a lot, but now I'm only at Miror B. since I deleted my file by accident....I thought I was erasing my sister (which she gave me permission) file but I deleted mine T-T I had purified every Pokemon and was ready for Ho-oh...WAAH!

I can't wait for Act 5! PM me when it's up, pweezy!

Guitar dude bill
13th November 2005, 3:39 PM
x kazemon. with a parody this funny you don't even need to spell it right. it doesn't make a difference in a parody

Yoru Ryu
14th November 2005, 1:17 PM
TBA: What on earth is BoBoBo-Bobo-BoBo? Heh, and i don't think this is as crazy as Typhogirl's humour fic XD

Armagedon: Monty Python! God, i steal from that all too much XD Hehe, thank you!

Blingin G: Heheh, it's much funnier in my head... i sometimes wish i could draw it out. Thanks!

X Kazemon: O.O >.< Bloody hell! I spelt Bayleef wrong? That's a wonder since i always use Chikorita as my starter in Silver. Thanks for telling me, i shall correct that now ^^ It IS a good job your sister wasn't around then :P

Ooooh, i can get people away from the forums to laugh too? Great! *strikes off list* And it's nice to have friends on here... i don't actually have many people to talk to really ;_; And i'll send ya a PM when the next chappie is up then -^^-

The Big Al
14th November 2005, 5:13 PM
Bo*7 is a whacky anime I've scene which is simply insane like this fic.

~*Ratiosu*~
14th November 2005, 10:30 PM
TBA-I've seen the episode "Pasta: The Greatest Food in the World" or something like that...I think I'll stick to my Inuyasha and FullMetalAlchemist :D Funny thing is I'm only 12 and I like that stuff....my sister doesn't.

Yoru Ryu-Yes, you did. You spelt it wrong. I don't mind though...my sister would though. I might tell her just for fun. See how she gets. At first she'll probably say "So?' but tomorrow she'll yell "WHAT? She spelt Bayleef wrong?" I used Chikorita as my starter and named it Aelita since I like Code LYOKO. Usually I use Cyndaquil so I can beat the crap out of Sprout Tower :D

-Sincerely Yours, X Kazemon

Joe Vega #4
14th November 2005, 11:05 PM
TDK: Heh, my computer craps out on me too... and this place keeps logging me out o__O; And stupidity does have it's ups :D

Yeah, I have to log in on every window that I open -_-;.


JOHNSON: How dare you try to take the place of our dear police chief, impostor! (grabs Wes) Come, we must flee from this land to safer ground, Master! We shall touch the horizon in our fight for right! No stone shall we leave unturned in our never ending search for the human scum polluting this world. But no! i cannot accept you to come on this quest for you may become tired and weak; maybe even injured! No! No, I will continue with our trial on my own! (kisses Wes) Farewell, sweet the, I hardly knew thou!

Sherles does look like he's Wes's father. That was a bloody long speech, it was. Johnson's such a Drama Queen. Things like this are always good for a laugh.

P.S. NEVER abbreviate m'name. Type it out fully. Eeveelutions are cats, by the way.

Drayano
16th November 2005, 4:50 PM
I read the chapters last night but I never replied. o.o;

This fic made me laugh my head off. XD. Definitely a fan-fiction to keep reading.

~*Ratiosu*~
17th November 2005, 6:43 PM
Just click "Remmebr me" when you log in and you'll be in forever unless you shut the computer down and dissect it like my uncle and i did.

Yoru Ryu
21st November 2005, 1:06 PM
A/N: You really do need to understand the game to get this. Really, really!

Heheh, and i've been busy playing Colosseum XD. It's odd that i like the Colosseum games better than the Gameboy ones o_o


Pokemon Colosseum.
This can’t be a Cipher operation!

Act 5
Scene: Tissue paper is man’s best friend.

RUI: Oh forget this! Let’s just go to the Colosseum.

So, our ‘heroes’ make their way to the Pyrite Colosseum. They fall to the floor as two missiles plummet into the building… presumably from Phenic’s Trainer Thing as it will be forever known. It’s a war zone.

RUI: Ok, total and utter quiet. D’you understand?
WES: (Nods enthusiastically)
RUI: So, for example, if any of us crawl over any barbed wire, they must not on no account go --
UMBREON: Aaahhhggg!
ESPEON: You just crawl over some barbed wire?
UMBREON: No, I just put my paw in a blob of ice cream.
ESPEON: (Turns back) Oh, that’s all right then.

They crawl or shuffle closer to the Colosseum. Wes walks until he’s yanked back down.

RUI: Now where are we?
WES: Hm (Takes out map) Looks like we’re in an area marked with mushrooms.
RUI: (Deadpan) What do those symbols de-note?
WES: … that we’re in a filed of mushrooms?
RUI: Arg! That is a military map! It is hardly going to list interesting flora and fungi!
WES: Hey, you’re right! (Looks at map closer) It says “mine”. So, these mushrooms belong to the man who made the map.

Silence.

RUI: Either that or we’re in the middle of a minefield!
WES: So he owns the field as well?!
ESPEON: Oh dear…
WES: Soooo, what happens if we stand on a mine? What do we do?
RUI: Well, normal procedure, Wes, is to jump two hundred feet into the air and scatter yourself over a wide area.
WES: Ah! Got’cha!

They reach the Colosseum. You would’ve thought I could make some sort of joke about the canyon there but I can’t. Everything is dark.

COLOSSEUM LADY: Sorry but because of the bl--

No wait! I’ve got one now!

MIROR. B: (Dancing) Shake ya groove thang!
EVICE: (Dancing. Bends over)
NASCOUR: (Behind Evice) If that’s a groove, the Grand Canyon’s a dent.

Crickets chirp.

COLOSSEUM LADY: Sorry but because of the blackout the Colosseum is closed.
RUI: How typical.
COLOSSEUM LADY: Boy, you would’ve thought they’d figure out they aren’t getting into a Colosseum this early on.
RUI: Well, we’ll just wait here then.
COLOSSEUM LADY: What? No, but you have to go get a gear and fix the windmill.
RUI: I thought the missiles from Phenic did this?
COLOSSEUM LADY: Hush.

They leave to see the windmill problem. All the major characters of Pyrite are there… obviously.

SHERLES: Some rapscallion has stolen the gear to work this windmill here.
DUKING: Ah but young laddah! Mah assistant has ne the courage te break the law!
UMBREON: Will you stop calling everyone “young laddah” please? It’s very disturbing.

Wes and Rui squeeze in the room and the anonymous windmill guy comes up.

ANONYMOUS WINDMILL GUY aka ANDY: Hey, mandatory Colosseum Hero!
WES: Where?!
ANDY aka SANDY: Go get us this windmill gear will you? Some character who really doesn’t play a major part in this game has made off with it.
DUKING: Silva de ne break the law!
SANDY aka CANDY: Whatever. Just get it for us will you?
UMBREON: God! We have to do everything around here.
ESPEON: It’d be a pretty boring game if we didn’t do anything…
SHERLES: Has anybody seen Johnson again?

Somewhere on the moors Johnson is rocking back and forth sucking his thumb.

RUI: I have nothing of importance to say.

Seems like Rui doesn’t want to be her usual blindly optimistic self so looks like we have to find this gear. Cue badass motorbike.

RUI: (Looks around) How fun, a scrap heap.
WORKER: Oi! We’re working hard here y‘know!
RUI: No, you’re not. You’re eating a sandwich.
WORKER: (Looks down at sandwich) I’m on my break.
UMBREON: Hmm, yes. I bet you’ve been on your break for the last six months too.
WORKER: Who told you?!

Another worker who looks exactly like this worker walks up to the group.

ANOTHER WORKER: Some silver haired lad just dumped a gear here.
ESPEON: And you told us that because?
ANOTHER WORKER: Because he dumped it in my spot. I like to eat my sandwich there!

All the other workers are sat in a long row eating identical sandwiches at exactly the same time. Don’t you just love low budget games?

ESPEON: The repatative motions are hypnotizing.

Wes and Rui find the gear.

RUI: Look at the size of this gear! It must be twice the size of a human and ten times the weight. Wes, put it in your pocket.
WES: Okay!

Pyrite Town.

SHERLES: Oh well done, boy!
DUKING: (Falls to knees) Ay, Silvah how could yah? The betrayal; it’s Macbeth all over again!
ESPEON: What’s that got to do with anything?
DUKING: (Whispers) I’m running out of stereotypical Scottish things to say.
ESPEON: That doesn’t surprise me what with idiocy taking up so much space already.
CANDY aka DANDY: Lets get this place up and running again! (Starts singing an annoying song)

The windmill springs to life. That phrase can be used under far too many conditions.

DANDY aka MANDY: There! I guess you don’t really have an excuse not to get in the Colosseum anymore.
ESPEON: Yes! I’m gonna kick some arse, damnit!
WES: According to the statistics of a victory over the Pyrite Colosseum we, logically, need more than four Pokemon, two of which still remain Shadowed. This is, however, excluding the fact that both Espeon and Umbreon could very easily overpower any of the challengers anyway.
RUI: What?
WES: (Shrugs) I haven’t said anything good in a while.
UMBREON: (Attempt at changing the subject) I like Sherles. He’s normal.
SHERLES: (Starts) Did… that… Pokemon… just talk… to me? (Rubs face) I’ve got to stop sniffing that glue stick.

Beat.

DUKING: Lets go back te mah place an’ enjoy a wee bite of mah haggis.

Beat.

UMBREON: No.
DUKING: Fine! I’m goin’ Loch Ness Monster Spotting then, laddah. (Fingers binoculars)
ESPEON: To draw attention away from the mangy Scotch git… don’t we need some more pokeballs?

Outskirt Stand.

WES: Excuse me, but is this a cheese shop?
DUSTY: No.
RUI: Well that joke’s knackered then isn’t it?

Back in Pyrite town. Lots of switching going on. Are you keeping up?

COLOSSEUM LADY: I'll just pocket this fee and have a good time in the Colosseum.

So, as Wes and Co enter the Colosseum the scene switches to the Cipher Operation going on. In a wreaked building.

NASCOUR ON TV: I trust everything is going according to plan?
FERMA: It would be if Miror. B would just come out of his dressing room.
NASCOUR ON TV: Get out here, lout!

A shuffling noise is heard. Miror. B appears.

REATH: Why are you wearing a dress?
FERMA: And here I thought you were changing into your Colosseum XD outfit.

Mmmmm, chesty. I now have newfound respect for the disco maniac.

MIROR.B: Someone locked me out of my dressing room, so I went into Nascour’s and this was all I could find (Motions to dress)

Everyone stares at Nascour.

NASCOUR ON TV: What?! That’s not mine!
FERMA: (Looks at tag in collar) It’s got your name in it, Nascour.
NASCOUR ON TV: It’s not miiiine!
REATH: Then why does it have your name in it?
NASCOUR ON TV: It’s, er, the um… you see… I…

Ten minutes later.

NASCOUR ON TV: Ah! You see… you…

Just say it!

NASCOUR ON TV: Ah ha! (Points at Miror. B) You did this to me! You planted that dress in my wardrobe!
MIROR.B: What?
NASCOUR ON TV: You’re trying to convict me of fake transvestism; that’s what it is. You’re trying to de-thrown me as Most Popular Cipher member!
REATH: (Snort) Popular.
NASCOUR: Why are you doing this to me? Why? Whhhhy? You’re trying to send me mad aren’t you! You’re trying to send me round the twist!
MIROR. B: Er, you--
NASCOUR ON TV: No! The plan continues as…

Wait for it.

NASCOUR ON TV:… planned.
MIROR. B: Oh, we have a plan this year, do we?
NASCOUR ON TV: Very much so my old friend! And It’s not just a meaningless string of prank calls this time (Out)
MIROR. B: Anyway! You, Peon. Go stand outside the Colosseum!
PEON: Why?
MIROR. B: Because the ice cream van’s coming. Why do you think?! Because it’s getting crowded in here?
PEON: Oooookay…

That was cheap. Outside the Colosseum.

RUI: I just can’t believe you did that Wes.
WES: It was fun! But I can’t help but think--

Think?

WES: That everyone was mad at me.
UMBREON: What for? You jumping the barrier?
ESPEON: Or for throwing Makuhita’s pokeball into the crowd?
UMBREON: Hell, there’s gonna be some sore groins tomorrow.
MAKUHITA: Hehehehehe.

Has anyone else but me thought that the crowd sound like they’re being murdered when they cheer?

PEON: (To Wes) Did you win the Colosseum challenge?
RUI: No. He got us kicked out.
WES: But I never leave without stealing… I mean snagging… something!
RUI: Yes, but you’re only meant to snag Shadow Pokemon; not objects!

All property is theft.

WES: Yes, so i'm nicking it (Holds up stolen ice cream)
PEON: (Gasp) Is that a double whipped raspberry split with chocolate sprinkles?! The boss loves those! Come with me to give it to him.
RUI: Why can’t you just take it yourself?
PEON: Well how else am I meant to get you to the hideout? Sheesh. I’m too unimportant to know these things. I don’t even have a name!

The Cipher Peon leads them to the wreaked building. Miror. B is stood across the room.

MIROR. B: (Bursts into song) Cest moi, cest moi!
RUI: Stop that!
MIROR. B: Oh, what? (Turns) What? Streakface and Big Eyes?!
PEON: I got your ice cream, boss!
MIROR. B: What? You lead them here?!
PEON: Yes… um, sorry?

Miror. B snorts and makes lots of vague hand gestures.

MIROR. B: Oh, he’s sorry everyone! Sorry he lead Freak City straight to our official headquarters. Well never mind then. Here, sit down. Have a scone. Maybe some cream tea. You clutz! You blithering idiot! (Slaps Peon)
PEON: Ow!
ESPEON: Oh! Is this a Cipher hideout for Shadow Pokemon?
MIROR. B: No, it’s the headquarters for studies in to the paranormal.
ESPEON: No need to be sarcastic… that’s my job… grumble.
MIROR. B: Oh, but wait. You don’t have Furret.
RUI: Are you wearing a dress?

Silence.

MIROR .B: Yes.

For you Spanish, silencio.

RUI: Is that a tattoo on your neck?
MIROR. B: Bloody Nascour has to have his name on everything (Grumbles) Look just go get that Furret!
WES: Like you can tell me what to do!
RUI: Actually we do have to go get it, Wes.

It seems to be taking a long while to get anywhere around here. Until next time!

MIROR. B: You know… it’s very refreshing to be this free. I’m starting to understand why Nascour wears dresses.
NASCOUR’S VOICE: I do not wear dresses!

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

Okay... that was random. Eep.

~*Ratiosu*~
21st November 2005, 4:55 PM
SO FUNNY! Nascour is demented...like the Gorillaz. I just watched their music video and now I'm scared...*gasps are heard* Look I'm only 12 people! Can't 12 year olds have a break? Oh, 12 year olds can't write...look at my stories! Ach, whatever (I'm german, not fully though :D) anyway, great chapter! Too funny. I like when Miror B. has Nascour's dress on...how would that look...sends wrong images through my mind...

Nylf
21st November 2005, 7:32 PM
Sorry I haven't reviewed in a while. Awesomely funny, especially Makuhita. I'm not in a real reviewing mood at the moment, but this is great.

Sike Saner
22nd November 2005, 1:10 AM
Highlights (With Rib Meat)


RUI: Look at the size of this gear! It must be twice the size of a human and ten times the weight. Wes, put it in your pocket.
WES: Okay!

That is a "snort" moment.


DUKING: (Falls to knees) Ay, Silvah how could yah? The betrayal; it’s Macbeth all over again!
ESPEON: What’s that got to do with anything?
DUKING: (Whispers) I’m running out of stereotypical Scottish things to say.


And that is another.


REATH: Why are you wearing a dress?
FERMA: And here I thought you were changing into your Colosseum XD outfit.

Mmmmm, chesty. I now have newfound respect for the disco maniac.

^_^ You should have seen me the first time I saw him in that XD costume.

...actually, maybe it's better that you didn't....


Has anyone else but me thought that the crowd sound like they’re being murdered when they cheer?

YES. XD


Miror. B snorts and makes lots of vague hand gestures.

You know what? The first thing I thought when I read that was "Awwwww..." What does that say about me?


MIROR. B: You know… it’s very refreshing to be this free. I’m starting to understand why Nascour wears dresses.

^_^ Oh, that's so impure. And, as if it wasn't great enough, it's followed at once by...


NASCOUR’S VOICE: I do not wear dresses!

...resulting in instant magic. XD Love it.

Randomness is good and so is the abundant presence of Miror B. This is my new favorite chapter, and I think I've already made it abundantly clear why.

...Oh, come on, he's cute and you know it! *hugs Miror B.*

Yoru Ryu
24th November 2005, 12:12 PM
Haha, i like doing this fic. Tis fun. But i have a question...

I'm not good with ratings... AT ALL. And i was just wondering if saying the word bastard would be okay? Bollocks and bugger are fine even when mentioned a lot but i'm not too sure about bastard. Maybe it's fine if it's only mentioned once. And i don't want the censor stars to come up either since they, frankly, ruin the impact -_- And i don't know how to get around the censor other than italizing a letter anyway ¬¬ Arse is fine but *** isn't? Good job i don't say *** then XD

And i'm well aware of the ironic fact that i've already used the word whether it's in the fic or not ¬¬

Hehe, and Snagger Outlaw has quoted the line from Wes as a kid in her siggie :3 That was a nice suprise.

AND, this has nothing to do with anything but, a comic for a line XD Rui can see... (http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/25576998/)

The Big Al
24th November 2005, 4:05 PM
The insanity continues. I love Wes's reaction to the minefield.

Yoru Ryu
28th November 2005, 12:07 PM
It's not really that insane is it?

Anyway, chapter/act six should take a little while longer. I'm working on another humour fic featuring the Elite Four of Kanto, Johto and Hoenn.

Sora
29th November 2005, 7:55 PM
Hehe, and Snagger Outlaw has quoted the line from Wes as a kid in her siggie :3 That was a nice suprise. [/URL]
It was deserved! What the hell is wrong with you people, do more Pokemon Colosseum/XD crap! I might have to do an XD thing in your format... why not.

The Big Al
29th November 2005, 8:03 PM
An XD spoof would be awasome. Especially with that nitwit assistant of the good doctor.

dfarrar6342
30th November 2005, 12:16 AM
MAKE IT STOP!!! XD i cant take it! hysterical fic, Yoru!:D

Yoru Ryu
3rd December 2005, 8:27 PM
I hope people are saying hysterical in the good way XD

Neway, the next act is at four pages. I just can't seem to make them as long as the first act... i guess it was the flashbacks that did it then.

~*Ratiosu*~
8th December 2005, 3:13 PM
All my interviews are suckish...I don't seem to have a sense of humor :D I'm going to be driven crazy by the music on HamHam Heratbreak (since my sister is playing it)...

ALTO (the Latios) : There ya go again! Ooh...Hamtaro...I wanna play!
X: *talking to Wes in the bathroom while peeing is still heard* So, do you like your career?
WES: What's that?
X: Um...do you like cranberries?
WES: You bet! They're my preciousssss.....

Angeling
10th December 2005, 10:22 PM
Rofl, hilarious crazy funny fanfic you have there. XDD It's a really good parody and portrays them soo.. greatly. ;D

But I think Espeon and Umbreon looks more like cats.. but oh well. O_o Great Wes and Rui.. and the 'eons. Lmao, especially the psycho Espeon.

Great work on the fanfiction, and I'll be eager to read the next act/chapter. ^^

guiltysparkzz
11th December 2005, 7:49 PM
My god, this fic is flipping hilarious *bookmarks* I never have time to read through whats up, so I'm a tad lost when I read the new chapter, though it does follow the game (mostly)

Very good work with this.

Jelly♥Winry
17th December 2005, 2:27 PM
O.o

So... F*cking... FUNNY! That is the most funny thing i have ever read! Act 6 is sure to bring up laughter!

Atomic Boo
17th December 2005, 2:39 PM
That was a bit naughty Yoru, using Blackadder jokes as your own (the minefield scene).
But you definately made up for it by producing one of the best fics on the whole forums!

Yoru Ryu
17th December 2005, 4:57 PM
That was a bit naughty Yoru, using Blackadder jokes as your own (the minefield scene).
But you definately made up for it by producing one of the best fics on the whole forums!

Yeah, i've been using Monty Python jokes through the whole thing too XD MP is my drug! They just fit. I've got some Dads Army ones lined up as well >_> Heheh, thanks!

It does seem i have a lot of readers who don't comment in the thread so i'll just say Act six is coming along slowly ^^; I can never decide if i want to do this parody, the Dolls or DA stuff. Life is hard :P

Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix
17th December 2005, 5:14 PM
Is it LEGAL for things to be this funny? If I may, The WTF Ditto
http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b371/crystal_matrix60/wtf.png
Ive only read the first 2 acts, but goddamn, this is funny.

Jelly♥Winry
19th December 2005, 10:54 AM
Everyone has their own personality in this... I can't wait to find out what furret's is!

Silent Shadow
20th December 2005, 2:56 PM
Hey Yoru, I've been reading this since a few days ago and now I'll finally reply. I gotta say the combination of super funny, really random comedy, mixed with a very tiny bit of the actual Colosseum storyline is killer especially with you writing it!
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000/10 lol


SO FUNNY! Nascour is demented...like the Gorillaz. I just watched their music video and now I'm scared...*gasps are heard* Look I'm only 12 people! Can't 12 year olds have a break? Oh, 12 year olds can't write...look at my stories! Ach, whatever (I'm german, not fully though :D) anyway, great chapter! Too funny. I like when Miror B. has Nascour's dress on...how would that look...sends wrong images through my mind...
Who says 12-year-olds can't write? I'm 12, people read my fan-fic and they love it! So when you have time go read it and then say 12-year-olds can't write. (Besides the fact that I'm 13 now, But I started it when I was twelve, last year up until last month)

Zimmy
20th December 2005, 6:13 PM
This thing is freakin' hilarious! XDDDD You had me laughing so loud, my Mum came in to ask what I was laughing at... which was actually kinda annoying, BUT STILL!

Monty Python referances rule. :D

~Zimmy

~*Ratiosu*~
20th December 2005, 6:46 PM
I'm supposed to be "smarter" than 90% of the population (that's what my mom says) so that explains itself. I mean, most people say "You write BOOKS? Amazing!" and I'm like....no it's not, I can write...

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
20th December 2005, 9:12 PM
this changes the definition of "funny" it makes me laugh so much! i wonder what eagun and bella (rui's grandparents) are going to be like!

Deoxyrachi
23rd December 2005, 7:42 PM
I give it an 11! I can't wait for the next chapter!

Guitar dude bill
23rd December 2005, 7:51 PM
I can't wait for Relic forest and MT battle. They'll be so funny. MT battle. Probably more of this war thing. (Ya know when it's under attack.)

Yoru Ryu
27th December 2005, 1:46 PM
A/N: I didn’t think as many people would’ve read this as they have. Anyway, sorry for the delay in this chapter, ya know, Christmas an’ all, yeah.

Let the confusion continue!


Pokemon Colosseum
One hit KO.

Act 6
Scene: Accidental reading may induce vomiting.

It seems to be taking a long while to get anywhere around here.

MIROR. B: Look just go get that Furret, please!
WES: Like you can tell me what to do!
RUI: Actually we do have to go get it, Wes.

It’s actually quite hard to decide which Pokemon I want to feature.

RUI: Hmm, yes. (Rolls eyes) But I think we all know it’ll just end up being the Legendary Dogs.

Hey! Don’t make assumptions!

RUI: “Assumptions” eh? That’s a big word for you.

Grumble…

ESPEON: (Looks around) And everyone thought Wes was the one who talked to himself…
UMBREON: I find it more disturbing that no one notices that Pokemon are speaking English.
MAKUHITA: Hola, senorita!
UMBREON: Lovely…

The group returns to Cail at the Pyrite Entrance. But first they’ve to go though the vast Trainer’s Arena… place… thing. A group of trainers approach them.

THAT GUY WITH NOCTOWL: Hey, hey, hey! What’s happen’ y’all? These are my homies; Flaaffy Chick, Quagsire Dude and Slugma Lad. What y’all doin’ in our crib!?

Stare.

WES: Rui, I’m scared.
RUI: (Grabs Wes’s hand) We all are, we all are.
UMBREON: (Deadpan) Once again, I’m more disturbed at the Authors lack of understanding of street and/or ghetto slang.

And the prize for the most hurtful comment goes to the above!

RUI: Who are you really?
NOCTOWL GUY: We are the trainers who say Ni!
RUI: Uh…
NOCTOWL GUY: I mean… uh, we are the trainers who hang around this area getting trashed over and over by the Hero in the game because we’ve got nothing better to do… but we don’t cry! Well, maybe he does (Points at Slugma Lad)
SLUGMA LAD: I told you! I had a boo-boo! (Sniffles)
FLAAFFY CHICK: (Rubs face) Oy, here we go again…
QUAQSIRE DUDE: Snap it up, boy! You’re letting the side down!
RUI: Ooookaaaay. Well, we’ll just be going now (Tugs Wes) C’mon, Wes.

Am I bad person because I smiled when that boy started wailing? Across with Cail.

CAIL: Heyo! I’m Cail, welcome to - oh wait, I’ve seen you before.
WES: We’ve come to get Furret off you.
CAIL: Oh, have you really?
WES: Uh, y-yeah. That’s what I just said.
CAIL: Well, I’m not going down with a fight! (Throws a Pokeball)

The Shadow Furret appears just like any other normal Pokemon in Colosseum. A tacky light show and then Rui points out the obvious; that it actually is a Shadow Pokemon. I mean, anyone can tell when one comes up even before Rui starts on about it.

FURRET: Yo! I can see into your future… and it holds only loss.

Except this Furret is sporting a fancy pair of spoons.

CAIL: Furret, Shadow Rush!
FURRET: (Turns on Cail) For the last godamn time! I’m an Alakazam!
UMBREON: Oh joy. Yet another mentally deranged Pokemon.
ESPEON: It must be the Shadow process that minces their brains. Have we actually met one Shadow Pokemon that’s, how should I say, normal?
UMBREON: Makuhita’s a violent psychopath, it’s impossible to tell if Bayleef is actually a Croconaw or not and now this… I demand to be transferred to another Colosseum fic!

They’re hard to come by. I mean decent ones that aren’t all clich&#233;d.

ESPEON: (Hisses) Shhhhh, stop breaking the Third Wall.
CAIL: Furret, Shadow Rush, godamn!
FURRET: Oh I’ll give you a Shadow Rush all right. I’ll Shadow Rush you right to -
RUI: Language!
FURRET: What? I was only going to say Idaho.
RUI: Oh… well, just you watch your mouth. There are children around (Points at Wes)
WES: (Jumps up and down and claps) Yay! You’re paying attention to me.
CAIL: If you don’t do a Shadow Rush right now I’m going to come over there and kick your arse myself!
FURRET: (Turns back to Cail) Hah! Give it your best shot, loser.
CAIL: Right! That’s it! (Rolls up sleeves)

Cail begins storming over to his Pokemon before he notices something written on his arm.

CAIL: Oh, crap! I’m missing Oprah!
RUI: You had the date and time of when Oprah is on tattooed onto your arm!?
CAIL: Of course…
RUI: Is it permanent?
CAIL: Of course! What kind of fanboy do you take me for?
RUI: What happens when it get’s cancelled?
CAIL: I never thought of that. (Waves) Yeah, yeah, whatever. Gotta go!
ESPEON: Hey! We’re in the middle of a battle here!
CAIL: (Flips them off) Not today, suckers!

Cail flees.

WES: Did I just get another Pokemon?
CAIL’S VOICE: And since when do I “flee”!
FURRET: Erm, I never foresaw that.
ESPEON: And maybe, do you think, that’s because you’re not a Psychic type?
FURRET Well, well (Glances around)… neither are you! (Grins)
ESPEON: I am.
FURRET: Yes, well I, damn.

I think I’m falling asleep, and so are the people reading this. Let’s move it along people.

Re-enter the battle. Shadow Furret attacks.

FURRET: Psychic! (Holds spoons out)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: Psybeam! (Waves spoons about again)
UMBREON: …
FURRET: Er, Psywave? (Shakes spoons)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: (Thrusts spoons out) Aveda Kedavra!
UMBREON: What?
FURRET: Oh, sod it. Shadow Rush!
ESPEON: Ow! (Faints)
UMBREON: Hahahaha.
FURRET: Helping Hand! (Twiddles spoons)

Nothing happens.

UMBREON: (Uses Bite)
FURRET: Ow!
UMBREON: (Struts) Bloody hell I’m fantastic! I mean, uh, grumpy, grrr.

Talk about a fast paced battle, eh? Furret regains his posture.

FURRET: Come on then! (Hops back and forth)
WES: What?
FURRET: Have at you!
WES: (Throws a rock at Furret)
FURRET: Yeouch! Don’t throw things at me, it’s not nice. Ow, that really hurt. Who throws a rock? Honestly…
WES: (Throws another rock)
FURRET: Ooooww! Knock it off!
RUI: Just throw a bloody pokeball!

Wes throws a pokeball at Furret.

RUI: (Slaps forehead) A Snagball, moron!

Wes stares off into space.

RUI: Oh for Pete’s sake! (Grabs a burlap sack, stuffs Furret in it)
FURRET: Oh God, I’m blind! Wait! I know! What self respecting Psychic can’t perform Flash?

Furret does something in the sack. We can only assume he’s trying to wave those spoons about again since we can’t actually see through material.

FURRET: Flash! (Shines a torch) Hey! I found fifty pence in here, yay!
RUI: (Hands sack to Wes) Next time; do it right!
ESPEON: (Rubs face) Oh, all the exclamation marks… (Wobbles)

Let’s go back to Miror. B eh?

MIROR. B: (Dancing back and forth) I trust you got the Furret?
RUI: And I trust you got out of that dress.
MIROR. B: Aren’t we a sarcastic little miss today.
RUI: Yeah, whatever. Let’s just get this over with.
MIROR. B: Oh, hohohoho. The little Big Eyes is a feisty one.

The funky Miror. B music starts up.

MIROR. B: Let’s get this over with, I have an audition for Gale of Darkness. None of the other Admins got in, but I can dazzle that little boy with my magnificent dance steps. (Moon walks)
RUI: Oh look, Wes (Half-heartedly points at Sudowoodo) A Shadow Pokemon… and all that jazz.
WES: Aww, I don’t like Sudowoodos either.
MIROR. B: (Pirouette) Big Eyes, Streak Face; prepare to lose.

Miror. B whips his arm out to command his backup dancers AKA the Ludicolos to attack when a phone rings.

MIROR. B: Stop the presses!

The music stops.

MIROR. B: (Pulls out mobile phone)
???: Hello.
MIROR. B: Hello…? How did you get this number?

And advert in the paper reads: “Get your funk on at Cipher and groove until your feet bleed. Interested? Then call 015689432601 for our top consultant, Miror. B. Calls cost fifty Pounds per minute.”

MIROR. B: Has Nascour been arrested for drunk driving again!?
RUI: That phone’ll give you a brain tumour, you know?
UMBREON: Oh, that’s just urban legend.
ESPEON: That’s what they said about Barry White…
???: No. I’m looking for a Miss Teresa Tuhugg.
MIROR. B: Hold on (Shouts) I’m looking for a Teresa tuhugg! Trees to hug! I’m looking for trees to hug!
RUI: (Snort)

Everyone bursts out laughing, because they’re just that sad. Miror. B hisses at everyone in the room.

MIROR. B: Silence, infidels!
???: Hello, Hank? You still there?
MIROR. B: (Flabbergastered) How do you know my name!?
???: Oh, we know everything about you.
MIROR. B: “We” huh? So, you must be some sort of organisation and since your name isn’t showing up you must be an opposing organisation. Additionally, you have a child’s voice so one would assume you are under the age of fifteen. And therefore must be intelligent enough to hack into the Cipher Database to allocate this number, and there are only a handful of children that can do that… Nett, is that you?
NETT: Damn.

Arguing voices are heard at the other end of the line.

MARCIA‘S VOICE: You idiot, Nett.
PERR‘S VOICE: Yeah, way to go.
SECC‘S VOICE: I told you we should’ve used the patented Voice Disguiser, but nooooo. Does anyone listen to me? No, it’s all "Nett this, Nett that, dad got me a new bike yesterday." God!
MARCIA’S VOICE: You’re such a loser, Secc.

It’s like an episode of Coronation Street down there. Or whatever local soap you watch that depresses the hell out of you.

WES: Is that one of those Scottish kids?
RUI: Yeah, I think so.
WES: Then I’m confused.
UMBREON: Just think of the poor audience then.

Miror. B throws the phone to the floor and stomps on it using those massive heels to crush it. The poor thing didn’t stand a chance.

MIROR. B: Dance, dance revolution!

The funky Miror. B music starts up, again.

MIROR. B: (Bursts into song) I was strolling down the-
RUI: (Jumps up and waves) Ey, we’ll have none of that!
MIROR.B: But-
RUI: You’re not doing any singing while I’m here!
MIROR.B: (Scoffs) Fine then. (Recalls Sudowoodo) And Plusle is back there.
RUI: Oh, what? Er, um, th-thanks… I guess. C’mon, Wes.

As Wes and Rui leave for the back room Miror. B starts singing again.

MIROR. B: Oops, I did it again -
RUI: (Charges back in) Stop that!
MIROR.B: It’s raining men -
RUI: Knock it off!
MIROR.B: I’ve got dance fever -
RUI: Watch yourself!
MIROR. B: Big Eyes and Streak Face sitting in a tree, k-I-s-s-I-n-g -
RUI: (Punches Miror. B)

A moment of awed silence.

UMBREON: (Gasp) Rui. Did you just… punch Miror. B?
RUI: (Rubs knuckles) Damn straight!
ESPEON: How, how could you?
WES: Oh great. (Throws arms up) She hits me all the time and no one cares about that!
UMBREON: Quiet, Wes.
WES: Humph (Sulks)

Everything is silent. Rui slowly walks over to Miror. B and nudges him with her foot.

RUI: Um, you okay there?

More silence. More eerie this time.

RUI: (Looks around the room slowly) Run for it!

Rui dashes out with Umbreon and Espeon on her tail. Wes skulks out after them.

WES: Lousy no good… mumble, mumble…

The funky Miror. B music still plays regardless.

THE AUTHOR AND MOST OF HER FRIENDS: (Smile and hit the reset button) Tell us we’re not the only ones who do this to hear the music again.
AUDIENCE: (Walk back in) Oh, was that not an intermission?
YORU:…

^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Slightly longer I think. Seven pages in Word. Is there even any Colosseum plot left in this? XD

And… if by some freak accident you haven’t noticed as of yet… The Holy Grail is my favourite film EVAH!

Joe Vega #4
27th December 2005, 3:38 PM
A/N: Am I bad person because I smiled when that boy started wailing? Across with Cail.

Maybeh behbeh.



RUI: Language!
FURRET: What? I was only going to say Idaho.
RUI: Oh… well, just you watch your mouth. There are children around (Points at Wes)
WES: (Jumps up and down and claps) Yay! You’re paying attention to me.

Well, for the moment.


Cail begins storming over to his Pokemon before he notices something written on his arm.

CAIL: Oh, crap! I’m missing Oprah!
RUI: You had the date and time of when Oprah is on tattooed onto your arm!?
CAIL: Of course…
RUI: Is it permanent?
CAIL: Of course! What kind of fanboy do you take me for?
RUI: What happens when it get’s cancelled?
CAIL: I never thought of that. (Waves) Yeah, yeah, whatever. Gotta go!
ESPEON: Hey! We’re in the middle of a battle here!
CAIL: (Flips them off) Not today, suckers!

LMAO!



FURRET: Psychic! (Holds spoons out)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: Psybeam! (Waves spoons about again)
UMBREON: …
FURRET: Er, Psywave? (Shakes spoons)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: (Thrusts spoons out) Aveda Kedavra!
UMBREON: What?
FURRET: Oh, sod it. Shadow Rush!
ESPEON: Ow! (Faints)
UMBREON: Hahahaha.
FURRET: Helping Hand! (Twiddles spoons)

Y'know, I was gonna do a Unforgivable Curse joke in a comic I want to make, but yeh beat me to it. Crap.


WES: (Throws a rock at Furret)
FURRET: Yeouch! Don’t throw things at me, it’s not nice. Ow, that really hurt. Who throws a rock? Honestly…
WES: (Throws another rock)
FURRET: Ooooww! Knock it off!
RUI: Just throw a bloody pokeball!

Wes throws a pokeball at Furret.

RUI: (Slaps forehead) A Snagball, moron!

Wes stares off into space.

RUI: Oh for Pete’s sake! (Grabs a burlap sack, stuffs Furret in it)
FURRET: Oh God, I’m blind! Wait! I know! What self respecting Psychic can’t perform Flash?

Furret does something in the sack. We can only assume he’s trying to wave those spoons about again since we can’t actually see through material.

FURRET: Flash! (Shines a torch) Hey! I found fifty pence in here, yay!

XD-kinda random.


???: No. I’m looking for a Miss Teresa Tuhugg.
MIROR. B: Hold on (Shouts) I’m looking for a Teresa tuhugg! Trees to hug! I’m looking for trees to hug!
RUI: (Snort)

Everyone bursts out laughing, because they’re just that sad. Miror. B hisses at everyone in the room.

My God. *faints*


MIROR. B: Oops, I did it again -
RUI: (Charges back in) Stop that!
MIROR.B: It’s raining men -
RUI: Knock it off!
MIROR.B: I’ve got dance fever -
RUI: Watch yourself!
MIROR. B: Big Eyes and Streak Face sitting in a tree, k-I-s-s-I-n-g -
RUI: (Punches Miror. B)

ROFLMAO!


I wanna do a Gale of Darkness... um... spoof? So can I? I could use your assistance.

Anyways, great episode. How about Dakim? How's he gonna behave?

Guitar dude bill
27th December 2005, 4:35 PM
OMG. That was soooooooooooo funny man. And random. It started off just making me smile, then laugh, then LMHA! Especially when they're talking to Cail. Wes sulking was hysterical. Shame I can't do good comedy. Unlike you, your script is the funniest script evah.

~*Ratiosu*~
27th December 2005, 4:41 PM
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOO funny!! OH MY GOSH...this was your best chapter yet!!

The Big Al
27th December 2005, 6:04 PM
I couldn't stop laughing. And Rui punched Mirror B. I was hoping she would become Rui Hulk and not him into Idaho.

Trillian
27th December 2005, 6:21 PM
Good thing I watched the Holy Grail this morning!
"One day, all this will be yours."
"What, the curtains?" <3 Monty Python!
Absolutely hilarious all the way through, by far one of the best fanfics I've read yet. Keep it up!

Yoru Ryu
27th December 2005, 8:24 PM
Dark Knight Jorro: I've never done a fic with a proper Co-Author before, so i don't know. I do have a few jokes for Colosseum XD but i'm concentrating on this for now. I'll have to break out my MP stuff again.

Blingin G: Wes sulking was good? Haha, that was just added to give Wes something to do really ^^

X Kazemon: You think? Thanks! I am trying to make them longer but not drag out as a side effect.

The Big Al: Heh, i don't think Rui!Hulk will come back, but maybe a different SuperHero... nah. Thanks!

Trillian: Nice, another MP lover ^.^ I have that curtains line in my sig on DA XD

"But, Mother"
"Father, i'm Father"

Dankies!

Joe Vega #4
27th December 2005, 11:52 PM
Well, what I mean is that I wanna start a Gale of Darkness fic. I could use your help with it. And if I ever do post one, people won't flame me for copying off your fic if I post that you approved of it. But I can be a co-author! Just gimme t3h thumbs up. *adds Yoru Ryu to his buddy list. Poor girl.*

Sike Saner
28th December 2005, 1:09 AM
RUI: Who are you really?
NOCTOWL GUY: We are the trainers who say Ni!

=D *explodes, then hugs you - do not ask how*


Cail flees.

WES: Did I just get another Pokemon?
CAIL’S VOICE: And since when do I “flee”!

XD


MIROR. B: Silence, infidels!

I LAUGHED UNTIL I CRIED.


MIROR. B: Big Eyes and Streak Face sitting in a tree, k-I-s-s-I-n-g -
RUI: (Punches Miror. B)

:o


UMBREON: (Gasp) Rui. Did you just… punch Miror. B?
RUI: (Rubs knuckles) Damn straight!
ESPEON: How, how could you?

Seriously, wtf Rui? *eye twitches* Oh...that poor, fuzzy-headed baby... T_T


THE AUTHOR AND MOST OF HER FRIENDS: (Smile and hit the reset button) Tell us we’re not the only ones who do this to hear the music again.

*nods* I confess to such. Not just for the music, though. ^_~

Miror B. was just priceless in this chapter. But, y'know, that's just him for you. ^_^ And points for "Flaaffy Chick", "Noctowl Guy" and the like. XD That's just friggin' awesome.

Nylf
28th December 2005, 5:49 PM
She only punched him? I would've sheared him. And the Pokemon are killing me, a spanish psychopath, whatever the Espeon and Umbreon are, a Croconaw/Bayleef which god only knows which it actually is and now a Furret convinced it's an Alakazam. The bits where it tried to use psychic attacks were best IMO. NOw an XD spoof would definetly be good, as I have completed the thing and would love to see Michael get a personality, plus has anyone noticed but the guy who runs the factory with the Primeape and Hypno looks and acts like a gorilla? I mean seriously, I thought Entei guy was a monkey man, but what his name with the Hypno is even worse.

Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix
28th December 2005, 10:38 PM
Hel-********-arious... I was laughing the whole time, but i think I saw a problem


Miror. B throws the phone to the floor and stomps on it using those massive heels to crush it. The poor thing didn’t stand a change.
Shouldnt it be 'Stand a Chance?'

Yoru Ryu
29th December 2005, 10:15 AM
Dark Knight Jorro: Ya don't really need my permission to post a fic. It all depends if you set it out like mine as to whether people flame or not... unless they're just simple minded, i dunno ^^; I was gonna do an XD parody myself but quite a few people have mentioned to me that they'd like to do one, so maybe i won't bother. Hmmm, what else can i spoof?

Sike Saner: I wondered how you'd react to Rui and Miror. B :3 I seem to have this problem with being sadistic with my faourite characters o___O

Nylf: Umbreon's grumpy and Espeon just states the obvious -^^- Colosseum does seem to have a thing for monkey men x_X

Haku of the Shell Bullet: Ah ha! And i've spotted another typo too >.< Thanks for pointing that out.

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
29th December 2005, 5:42 PM
i wonder what eagun and bella are going to be like...it's a really good chapter otherwise!

hammy_ham_ham
31st December 2005, 4:57 AM
funny.as.******.h***.

My pikachu brothers comedy series can't hold a candlet to this(cute little candlet!)

As a coloseumshipper(NOT RABID), I found the second base comment earlier great.

The MP references and parodies are funny as heck!

Write, I command you! Write or I shall send the bloodthirsty mutant hamster army!

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
31st December 2005, 10:42 PM
wonder what the other admins are going to be like...
this is so FUNNY!!!
wonder what the legendaries are going to be like...

mewgrl
1st January 2006, 3:43 PM
ROFL, great fic, I especially enjoyed



MIROR. B: “We” huh? So, you must be some sort of organisation and since your name isn’t showing up you must be an opposing organisation. Additionally, you have a child’s voice so one would assume you are under the age of fifteen. And therefore must be intelligent enough to hack into the Cipher Database to allocate this number, and there are only a handful of children that can do that… Nett, is that you?
NETT: Damn.

I cant believe you make this stuff up, you should publish your work in a book or something.

Keep up the good work


~nya!;151;

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
1st January 2006, 3:59 PM
i love the part where mirror b. says "Silence, Infidels"
i also like the part where he figures out it's Nett.
what happens when wes will use a time flute? will celebi have an attitude?

E-102 Gamma
1st January 2006, 4:17 PM
Yeah,I like the bit where Miror B. says "Big Eyes and Streak Face sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g!"

Silent Shadow
3rd January 2006, 12:04 AM
Nice new chap Yoru! I loved this part:


FURRET: Come on then! (Hops back and forth)
WES: What?
FURRET: Have at you!
WES: (Throws a rock at Furret)
FURRET: Yeouch! Don’t throw things at me, it’s not nice. Ow, that really hurt. Who throws a rock? Honestly…
WES: (Throws another rock)
FURRET: Ooooww! Knock it off!
RUI: Just throw a bloody pokeball!

Looks like Wes has been to the Kanto Safari Zone... lol (I had to say that... I thought it would be funny.... *feels stupid if it isn't* j/k) I don't think there is a word to how funny this fic is! Maybe Celebi will be greedy and mafia-like and charge money for purifying Pokemon.... here's my idea:

"CELEBI: So's I take it yous' want me to purify that there Entei pokemon for yous', huh? I'll do it, but only if one of yous' is willin' to pay me. 500 pok&#233;dollars is da price. One of yous' gonna pay me or what?
RUI: (Glares at Celebi) Let me just get my purse... Now Wes!
WES: (Playing with forest wildlife) Yay! (Claps hands, then throws a bird at Celebi.)
CELEBI: What's da big idea? (Faints)
ESPEON: I'm not one to inject logic into a situation, And I don't even know what that is! (Smiles) But do you think we overdid it a little?
UMBREON: (Backing up towards the exit in between words) No.... Not... a... bit.... (Escapes)
RUI: Umbreon, get back here! (Grabs Wes, who is still clapping his hands)
ESPEON: Oh sure, leave me by myself again, why don't ya! (Follows)

Everyone leaves, leaving only Celebi to wake up alone. If it ever wakes up that is....."

I know it's a lot, but go ahead and use it, unless you have something better in mind, it doesn't matter if you don't use it. But untill next time, keep it up Yoru!

*Suscribes to thread* And, I completely agree with what mewgrl in her last post. You should totally publish it when you can!

(off-topic) I have a shirt that says something for you: "4 out of 5 voices in my head say GO FOR IT!" lol

videogamer09
7th January 2006, 6:24 PM
I gotta say, this is without a doubt the funniest fanfic I've ever read. Very nice, I'll be subscribing to this one. :D

Ohtachi
8th January 2006, 3:09 AM
LMFAO that was funny. Furret was so funny. So was Makuhita from previous chapters. Lol. I hope all of the Shadow Pokemon are this funny. Keep up the great work.

Yoru Ryu
8th January 2006, 2:29 PM
Silent Shadow: Haha, that's not a bad idea for Celebi at all! But i doubt i could pull off a gangster personality very well.

Hmmm, as for act seven is it? Anyway, it's four pages so far, all it lacks is the plot to fit in with the jokes :p

The Big Al
8th January 2006, 10:24 PM
You've done some insane stuff so a gangsta Celebi would fit right in. Maybe you just need the mood get it going.

Another idea would be make Celebi a stereotypical Celebi. I think that would be funnier.

Ohtachi
9th January 2006, 1:52 AM
Celebi should appear soon if I'm keeping correct track. But these are some interesting suggestions. Hmmm. We'll see what happens when Wes purifies his first Shadow Pokemon. :D

Angeling
9th January 2006, 3:20 AM
Better late than never.. ;D Yay for new act/chapter. Here are my comments to different parts of the story that made me really LOL'ed.


FURRET: Psychic! (Holds spoons out)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: Psybeam! (Waves spoons about again)
UMBREON: …
FURRET: Er, Psywave? (Shakes spoons)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: (Thrusts spoons out) Aveda Kedavra!
UMBREON: What?
FURRET: Oh, sod it. Shadow Rush!
ESPEON: Ow! (Faints)
UMBREON: Hahahaha.
FURRET: Helping Hand! (Twiddles spoons)

Rofl, that was hilarious.. especially the "Aveda Kedavra" one.. that's the right spelling? Oo; But still, lovely.. and very true about Espeon, even if Espeon's my fav. Pokémon..


RUI: That phone’ll give you a brain tumour, you know?
UMBREON: Oh, that’s just urban legend.
ESPEON: That’s what they said about Barry White…
???: No. I’m looking for a Miss Teresa Tuhugg.
MIROR. B: Hold on (Shouts) I’m looking for a Teresa tuhugg! Trees to hug! I’m looking for trees to hug!
RUI: (Snort)

Lol @ Rui and Espeon. xD And Miror B of course. But rofl. XDD


UMBREON: (Gasp) Rui. Did you just… punch Miror. B?
RUI: (Rubs knuckles) Damn straight!
ESPEON: How, how could you?
WES: Oh great. (Throws arms up) She hits me all the time and no one cares about that!
UMBREON: Quiet, Wes.
WES: Humph (Sulks)

Omfg, violent Rui! XD Poor Wes. *gives him comfort cookies* Feel better, Wes-y.

...evenifilikemichaelmore. >>;

Lovely chapter/act though. ^^;

Deoxyrachi
9th January 2006, 9:58 PM
Awesome! Best chapter yet! You've inspired me to possibly do my own fan-fic!

shadowmilotic
12th January 2006, 4:46 AM
Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny! I can't stand it!!!;196; ;197;

lisalover
12th January 2006, 7:35 PM
hey yoru
ima new to serebii but a long time fan of yur fic. but a longer fan of mp. i hafta say your fic is one of the funniest. really it make me cry. anywho i was wonderin if you could do a act with the castel anthrax

shadowmilotic
14th January 2006, 2:48 AM
Oh yeah, I forgot to ask... when are you going to post the next act?:172bros:

Yoru Ryu
14th January 2006, 10:30 AM
Michael is in the next act, though only for a moment. It shows his personality for if i do decide to do an XD parody as i have a few ideas to use.

Anyhoo, shadowmilotic, the next chapter/act should be up sometime after we've got a new hardrive for our computer... it's seriously messed up... seriously. I hate it and it's already broken before it's even six months old. God, i'm lost when i can't CG on the computer or type fics >_<

psyduck101
17th January 2006, 8:01 AM
Dis iz soooooooooo funny, r u going to put XD001 (Shadow Lugia) in with Micheal??? I shore hope so!!!!

;249-d; ;249-d;

Best Quote ever: "If i close my eyes every thing goes dark!"

Thanx Yoro Ryu for making such a great story,

psyduck101

Ohtachi
17th January 2006, 9:21 PM
Dis iz soooooooooo funny, r u going to put XD001 (Shadow Lugia) in with Micheal??? I shore hope so!!!!

This Fan-Fiction is a comedy remake of the classic video game, Pokemon Colosseum. Not of the okay sequel, Pokemon XD: Gale of Darkness. Besides:

Wes > Micheal

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
19th January 2006, 11:59 PM
and furret>wes>micheal, LOL

Yoru Ryu
20th January 2006, 10:48 AM
No, the shadow Lugia won't be in this. Michael's only in it himself for about six or seven lines. The shadow lugia is in the Gale of Darkness parody i'm working one. The Colosseum games just beg to be parodied now i've actualyy finished the main plot of XD. This one is my main priority though, i like Colosseum better than XD.

Anyway, the new act should be up sometime next week, like Wednesday maybe. We're getting our omputer fixed on Monday, hopefully.

xXFallenButterflyXx
21st January 2006, 7:48 PM
.... You rock my socks. This story is teh PWNAGE!!! wh00t!


FURRET: Psychic! (Holds spoons out)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: Psybeam! (Waves spoons about again)
UMBREON: …
FURRET: Er, Psywave? (Shakes spoons)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: (Thrusts spoons out) Aveda Kedavra!
UMBREON: What?
FURRET: Oh, sod it. Shadow Rush!
ESPEON: Ow! (Faints)
UMBREON: Hahahaha.
FURRET: Helping Hand! (Twiddles spoons)

Why do I have the feeling you took this from that preview for Ants?

~;173; Fallen

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
22nd January 2006, 12:10 AM
hey yoru ryu, what are the other admins going to be like?

Yoru Ryu
30th January 2006, 7:49 PM
Oh, guess what? Depending on how much time i can get on the computer alone, the next chapter should be up in a couple days.

*Crickets*

What? I thought that was GOOD news... guess not. We finally got our computer fixed, but we had a totally new harddrive put in so i lost everything on it. Bah, i really should remember to backup stuff on the external harddrive.

So yeah, new chappie soon >_>

Angeling
1st February 2006, 8:15 AM
Oh, guess what? Depending on how much time i can get on the computer alone, the next chapter should be up in a couple days.

*Crickets*

What? I thought that was GOOD news... guess not. We finally got our computer fixed, but we had a totally new harddrive put in so i lost everything on it. Bah, i really should remember to backup stuff on the external harddrive.

So yeah, new chappie soon >_>

Yay. I hope so..

Your loyal, faithful fans will be eager for it.. D:

*hears more crickets* >__> *shoots them down* D:

Yoru Ryu
1st February 2006, 9:12 PM
A/N: I guess I should do a Disclaimer this chapter for some major stealing from MP ^^; SOOOOoooo…

Yoru does not own Pokemon, Monty Python, Windows, the world, China or that sweet I found under the sofa yesterday, no, that was dad’s. So, no suing! Please and thank-a-you.

FF.net finally found and deleted this from my account. Sometimes that place really annoys me, not letting me alter grammar and use “?!” and “???” when I want to. Damn >_>

And sorry this chapter is a bit on the bland side…


Pokemon Colosseum
Encounters of the GOD kind

Act 7
Scene: Are you honestly still reading this? Oh well, your life.

Everything is silent. Rui slowly walks over to Miror. B and nudges him with her foot.

RUI: Um, you okay there?

More silence. More eerie this time.

RUI: (Looks around the room slowly) Run for it!

Outside… away from the Cipher building, but I guess you could guess that couldn’t you?

UMBREON: Well, now that Rui’s committed physical damage on an unsuspecting victim, what do we do?
SHERELES: What was that?!
UMBREON: Wah! (Spins around)
SHERLES: (Pulls out handcuffs) You’ve been attacking innocent people?
RUI: (Looks around) If you call fashion disasters an innocent crime…

Aw, now that’s just mean.

SHERLES: (Points at Rui) I’m taking you in lassie.
FURRET: That damn dog! I could be a hero too, if I wanted! (Bites spoon in half) Oh no, George! (Pets spoon)
SHERLES: And you too, laddie (Points at Wes)
WES: Noooo, I have kids back home! Take them instead.
RUI: What?! Kids, with another woman?
WES: Sure; Emily, Amy and Richard…if this were an R rated fic you’d get it…
RUI: Fic? We’re in a fic?! God, I’d forgot. I can fix that. (Points) You!

Ah?

RUI: I want out!

No way!

RUI: (Reaches out) You!
YORU: Ah?
RUI I want out!
YORU: No way!
ESPEON: Whoa, talk about déjà vu.
UMBREON: (Rubs face) We haven’t just crossed the Third Wall, we’ve ploughed it down and built a house on it.
SHERLES: Now, now, leave that English hippy alone. You’re nicked me ol’ chum (Handcuffs Rui) You too lad.
WES What did I do?
SHERLES: You kidnapped my assistant.

Wes does a double take.

WES: Excuse me? He sexually assaulted me then ran off!

Let’s take a trip down memory lane.

JOHNSON: How dare you try to take the place of our dear Police Chief, impostor! (Grabs Wes) Come, we must flee this land to safer ground, Master! We shall touch the horizon in our fight for right! No stone we shall leave unturned in our never ending search for the human scum polluting our world. But no! I cannot accept you to come along on this perilous quest for you may become tired and weak; maybe even injured! No! No, I will continue with our trial on my own! (Kisses Wes) Farewell sweet thee, I hardly knew thou!

And back again.

WES: (Points up) There! See?
MAKUHITA: (Looks up) I don’t see anything…
SHERLES: There’s corruption in the forces?
ESPEON: You were there… idiot.
RUI: (Covers face) And I thought Sherles was normal…
SHERLES: And you really should keep your Pokemon in their balls.
WES: I want to but I can‘t.
ESPEON: And Wes was just sounding at least half way normal a few lines ago too.
CROCONAW: Bay! (Nods)

And so the Police Chief Sherles arrests Wes and Rui. Bet you didn’t see that coming! In prison.

RUI: God Wes, don’t get us into too much trouble will you?
WES: Me!?
ESPEON: You’re the one who attacked Miror. B, Rui!
UMBREON: Stop bickering. You should really be watching Makuhita.
TRUDLY: (Wails) Get that thing away from me!
MAKUHITA: Eheheheheh.

Makuhita Arm Thrusts Trudly in the crotch over and over and over, because we all know you can get a maximum of five hits from that attack. Oh yes.

TRUDLY: (Crumples to the floor)
FOLLY: Poor guy… or is it poor girl now? (Keels over laughing at his own lame joke)
TRUDLY: I hate… you… all…!
RUI: (Grabs Wes’ collar) I’m not talking to you anymore!
UMBREON: Huzzah!
WES: But you just did.
RUI: Starting now!
WES: Still doing it…
RUI: From… now!
WES: (Giggles) That counts.
RUI: Arhg! (Bangs head repeatedly on the bars)

More Makuhita at crotch action later (okay, that just sounded plain wrong) and Sherles comes to their cell with a special visitor.

EAGUN: Oh Rui I’m so disappointed in you.
RUI: Grandad! Uh, um… it’s not what it looks like. You see, ah, Wes here (Grabs Wes) was, uh, caught… littering a-and wouldn’t pay the fine so we got thrown in here. I didn’t attack anyone or anything, honest!
UMBREON: Wow, the balance of power has shifted.
ESPEON: And Wes is still at the bottom rung.
WES: …
SHERLES: Eagun has paid your bail; you’re free to go. (Turns to the Snagem Peons) He also paid your bail, but I’m a heartless bastard and aren’t letting you out.
FOLLY: Gee, thanks.
EAGUN: (Throws arm above head) Come, let us ride to Agate.

In Agate village. Heavens to Betsy, where did you think we where going?

WES: Look, Rui!
RUI: Agate!
UMBREON: Agate!
ESPEON: Agate!
MAKUHITA: Agate!
CROCONAW: Bayleef!
FURRET: It’s only a model.
RUI: Shh! I bid you welcome to my new home. Let us go… to my grandad‘s house..

All the old people in Agate burst into song.

~Do, do, do, do, doo~

We’re trainers of the Relic Forest
We dance e’re we’re able
We do routines and chorus scenes

EAGUN: And watch bootleg cable!

We train well here in Relic Forest
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.
We’re trainers of the Relic Forest
Our skills are for-mid-able
Though many times we’re given Pokemon
That are quite untrain-able
We’re Matlock mad in Relic Forest

BELLA: And sing from the diaphragm a lot!

In battle we’re tough and able
Quite indefatigable
Though some of us are disabled
It’s a busy life here in Agate…

EAGUN: I have to push the pram a lot!
Everyone returns to their houses.

RUI: On second thoughts, let's not go to grandad‘s house. It is a silly place.

They leave for the Celebi Shrine. Eagun’s already beaten them to it.

SKRUB: Allow myself to introduce… myself. I’m Skrub, the trainer with the most retarded name in the Pokemon franchise.
EAGUN: And I’m Eagun; and because I have a Pikachu people automatically assumed I was Ash Ketchum.
SKRUB: Yeah, right, whatever. Go Hitmontop! (Tosses a Pokeball)

And yet another Shadow Pokemon appears. Shall we catch this one? I’ll flip a coin.

MAKUHITA: Oh my Brotheeeer! How’s it hangin’, man?
HITMONTOP: Not too bad, sister, all things considering. What ya’ll doin’ nowadays, man?
MAKUHITA: (Points back at Wes) Oh, I have a trainer now. It ain’t too bad. But this weird guy keeps following us and no matter how many times I kick him in the crotch, he just won’t leave us alone.
TRUDLY’S HIGHPITCHED VOICE: It’s not by choice!
HITMONTOP: (Gazes at Wes) He’s… a trainer?
WES: (Frowns) Yo, yo, yo. I’m with it man; I’m happen’, I’m hip (Makes lots of vague hand gestures) Yo mah brother… um, man? I’m just kickin’ back…

Havin’ a Bud.

WES: … keeping it real. Cool ya’ll.
HITMONTOP: Um, right.
EAGUN: Pikachu, Quick Attack!
PIKACHU: (Does so)
SKRUB: Hitmontop, Triple Kick!
HITMONTOP: (Does so also) This’d be a lot easier if this damn Shadow Aura would lift so I could see what the hell I‘m doing.
SKRUB: You’re over the hill, old man!
EAGUN: (Offended) I’m not “over the hill“! I’m over the hill, through a hedge and in a ditch, thank you very much.
SKRUB: And that’s better because…?
EAGUN: I can blame my loss on senility.
UMBREON: I’ll say. Why would he keep using Quick attack when PIKACHUS ARE ONLY GOOD FOR SPECIAL ATTACK… kinda like you.
ESPEON: Hey!

Orre’s ‘Legendary’ trainer only has a Pikachu? Thrilling really.

RUI: We have to enslave that Pokemon, I-mean-catch-that-Pokemon! Makuhita, attack!
MAKUHITA: (Kicks Skrub in the crotch)
TRUDLY’S LESS HIGHPITCHED VOICE: Hah, see how you like it!
SKRUB: (Falls to the floor) Okay, okay, you win!
ESPEON: Do you plan to keep using this crotch joke?

Yes I do. I’m going to ride it until it’s dead.

UMBREON: (Sniffs) Not long to go then.
EAGUN: Quick Attack, Pikachu! (Tosses arm out)

A crick is heard. Eagun doubles over.

EAGUN: Oop, there goes my arm.
RUI: Grandaaaad, you’re embarrassing me.
EAGUN: Well excuuuuuse me for breaking my arm. God, children these days; why back in my day-
UMBREON: God, make it stop!
EAGUN:… it wasn’t all “email this, drive there, nuke that,” it was good old fashioned gumption. I remember my father telling me: “Boy, you’ll never amount to anything if you don’t…”

Oh hell, we’ve lost him. Wes, battle please.

HITMONTOP: No need, no need at all. I’m outta here (Kicks Skrub in the head) See ya, Makuhita!
MAKUHITA: Adios!
EAGUN: … and that’s why an orange is worth twice as much as a grapefruit. Of course grapefruits were rare and expensive back then, not like the tripe they pass of these days. In fact they…
ESPEON: My ears, they burn! Burn! (Rolls around on the floor)
FURRET: (Points spoons at Eagun) Psybeam please, please! God, please!
CROCNAW: Bay? Bayleef, bay, bay!
EAGUN: … that’s how I joined the Conservative Party, although that was a mistake on my part because they always said they were going to do something yet never actually did it. That irked me, that did. You know what else irks me? Sand. It gets everywhere, I honestly don‘t see…

As Espeon is rolling around on the floor and writhing with agony he touches something shiny.

RUI: (Reaches for it) It’s a disk of some kind.

And you missed the one in Miror.B’s place.

FURRET: What does it say?
EIN FILE: August Third. Today wasn’t a bad day all in all, I guess. Some chap had to be called out to fix my laptop (which I’m typing this on now, incidentally) and then I lost my ring down the sink. Actually, today has been rather bad! Nascour used the last of the loo roll too. Then I realised there’s no such thing as a toilet in Pokemon. What the hell have I been sitting on this whole time?!

Silence.

RUI: It must be part of his E-Diary, or something.
UMBREON: (Eyes Widen) I’m not staying around here anymore! You’re all freaks. (Escapes)

Everyone leaves the Celebi Relic area. I say “leave” but it’s more of a tumbling-and-clawing-over-each-other-to-get-away sort of leave.

WES: (Turns back to look into the forest) I get the feeling I’m being watched…

As he leaves a pair of deep blue coloured eyes follow his movement and narrow dangerously as he exits the clearing. A high pitched squeal pierces the silence and causes the Pidgeys in the area to shoot out from the tree tops… in some fanatical sort of way. Can you tell I’m trying to be dramatic? A tiny figure zips from tree to tree…

RANDOM CATERPIE: Ow! Hey, watch where your flying will ya?
???: Eep, sorry about that.

Hmmm, I wonder. At the entrance to Eagun and Bella’s house a short familiar figure stands.

MICHAEL: …
WES: …
RUI: …
MICHAEL: Uh…
RUI: Hey! You’re that scrawny kid in Gale of Darkness! What’re you doing here?!
WES: Growl, hiss, I don’t like you.
MICHAEL: (Rubs head) We’re using this set, thank you very much.
RUI: No! We are!
MICHAEL: Nooo! We are!
RUI: Nuh-uh!
MICHAEL: Yuh-huh!
ESPEON: Ah, lovely to see the art of dialogue hasn’t been lost…
MICHAEL: Shut up, you little Brownnoser.

Rui pushes the future Colosseum Hero aside and knocks him down into a ditch.

WES: Ha, take that, *****!
MICHAEL: No, I’m not happy now!
WES: (Cackles) That’ll teach you to take my place and become everyone’s favourite Snagger, an’ get all the fanfics and fanart you want while I lay in a corner rolled up in a ball completely forgotten, ignored… forgotten, I could really use a dictwhatchamacallit about now, and for longed! Wait, now I’ve made myself sad (Wimpers)
RUI: And you, you (Points down at Michael) You didn’t even have the common decency to even try to learn about us original Orre Heroes WHEN YOU HAD A LAB FULL OF SNAG MACHINES!
MICHAEL: Only one actually…
RUI: No! No, you had to wander around muted because you're that selfish!
WES: I was mute too... it wasn't any fun.
MICHAEL: (Glares at Rui) You know, i really don't like you.
RUI: Hisssssss!
MICHAEL: (Eyes widen) E-Eeevee…? Help!
EEVEE: (Picking at a hangnail and not paying attention)

Oh no, I don’t hold a grudge on Michael at all. Nope. I’m not like that… not at all. Not even in the slightest. Don’t give me that look! I don’t alright! Stop it! Oh yeah? Well I don’t like you either, humph.

MICHAEL: Good god woman! Is it really that big of a mystery why no one wants to know anything about you or be around you?
YORU: (Brandishing Colosseum flag and wearing one of those big fingers) I actually don’t have anything against you Michael; you‘re cute an‘ all, you just steal the limelight from Wesley… and I don’t like that. So I’m just going to bash you around a bit with this lamp.
MICHAEL: What? No, I’m leaving, alright?
YORU: (Waves flag) I put the “Author” in “Authority” baby!

Gah, the-the plotline… it’s died!

MICHAEL: I even got your granparents' P*DA number. Shows you who they like best now, eh?
RUI: (Snort) We’ll get their PDA number too, we‘re just running a little late is all.
MICHAEL: There’s a star in “P*DA” you know?
RUI: Shut up! (Raises hand to slap Michael but catches Wes on the backhand)
WES: Ow!
RUI: Arrrrg, all you Colosseum Heroes are so stupid!
MICHAEL: No need to get all excited.
RUI: (Breaks down) AAAAArrrrggghhh!

^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: I pulled the phone line out of the wall o____o;; And now my connection keeps running on and off, so don't mind me if there's more than a few mistakes ^^; Why can't i just get along with my computer? *hugs it* Gah! It's so cold ;__;

Damn swear filter ¬¬

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
1st February 2006, 9:44 PM
yay, first reviewer!
nice chapter!
i like the way ein turned the files into dairy entries XD!

too bad hitmontop escaped ;_; they will probably meet again at the cipher lab right?

nice micheal cameo. he's so funny!

what happens when the shadow's get purified? do they go through some pain or something?

what adittude will the other admins have? i really can't wait for the Beasts to show up!

overall: 8/10. sort of bland like you said, but still pretty good.

cdra1617
1st February 2006, 10:52 PM
*rofl*

MONTY PYTHON. HOLY SNAPPPPP! You referenced all the best parts and... that song. I love the song. Hilarious.

This thing is like... the crown jewel of all humor. Monty Python+Strange Pokémon characters=ROFL. Simplest way to put it.

I also wish my computer and I got along. ;;

shadowmilotic
2nd February 2006, 12:06 AM
I still haven't stopped laughing! I'll need to reread it later. Furret and "Croconaw" were hysterical!;162; ;159; The funniest part was when Michael appeared. Rui must REALLY hate him.:p
-shadowmilotic;350;

The Big Al
2nd February 2006, 1:11 AM
I couldn't breathe during the time they were in jail. Mounty Python humor, general instanity and groins under attack. Keep it up.

Wait a minute, you forgot about purifying Wes's Pokemon and what will happen to Umbreon?

Yoru Ryu
2nd February 2006, 11:39 AM
Thanks for the responses, i really wasn't sure about this chapter. I didn't think it was really up to standards (whatever they are XD) But i can't wait till i start on Ein and Venus... 'specially Venus ^.^

The way i'm going i may as well just quote the whole Holy Grail script, i steal that much from it ^^;

I think "Croconaw" is pretty unique ^_~ But i can't do any art of it, it'd totally ruin the effect because i know what it actually is o__o;

hammy_ham_ham
2nd February 2006, 3:21 PM
Hahaha! Monty Python shall rule! You missed the guy hanging on the wall though, that's one of my favorite parts of the song...

Oh well. You must have the killer rabbit-I mean, plusle! Yes yes, killer plusle!

Hoenir
2nd February 2006, 4:32 PM
WES: Look, Rui!
RUI: Agate!
UMBREON: Agate!
ESPEON: Agate!
MAKUHITA: Agate!
CROCONAW: Bayleef!

LOL Croconaw!


RUI: (Grabs Wes’ collar) I’m not talking to you anymore!
UMBREON: Huzzah!
WES: But you just did.
RUI: Starting now!
WES: Still doing it…
RUI: From… now!

I never thought I'd hear a umbreon say "huzzah"


I’m Skrub, the trainer with the most retarded name in the Pokemon franchise.

Too Right xD


Ah, lovely to see the art of dialogue hasn’t been lost…

Best... line... ever



Gah, the-the plotline… it’s died!

Meh, too right again.

^Favorite lines

Angeling
3rd February 2006, 10:35 AM
...Rofl.. xDD Lovely chapter again, and it made me laughed out loud a few times here.. and I'm in the hotel too. XD But wonderful chapter again.

...Even though I like Michael more than Wes.. >__> *hugs Michael*

Yoru Ryu
4th February 2006, 4:46 PM
Holy space monkeys, Batman! Fanart, looooook!

http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/28611419/

From Terra (raidragonair), of course it's on DA that way i can fave it ^.^

*Elated now* Uh, yeah, this fic is my baby!

The Big Al
4th February 2006, 4:51 PM
What will happen to the pokemon when they're purified. Will they return to normal or will they remain insane. I hope for the latter.

pokeinuyasha
4th February 2006, 7:07 PM
Wow! I like it! The best! I hope you continue, you're only in the beggining! I can have some ortography errors 'cause I am Brazilian. And I like it 'cause Wes become funny! I make the same thing in home, but Wes is Camilo and Rui is Camila, and they're not so funny like this!

Sike Saner
4th February 2006, 7:45 PM
The Parts I Enjoyed Most


SHERLES: (Pulls out handcuffs) You’ve been attacking innocent people?
RUI: (Looks around) If you call fashion disasters an innocent crime…

Aw, now that’s just mean.

Yeah! :< *huggles unconscious Miror B.*


Makuhita Arm Thrusts Trudly in the crotch over and over and over, because we all know you can get a maximum of five hits from that attack. Oh yes.

ROFL…


RUI: Arhg! (Bangs head repeatedly on the bars)

Now, why did that make me laugh? XD


More Makuhita at crotch action later (okay, that just sounded plain wrong)

XPPPPP


SHERLES: Eagun has paid your bail; you’re free to go. (Turns to the Snagem Peons) He also paid your bail, but I’m a heartless bastard and aren’t letting you out.

XD


SKRUB: Allow myself to introduce… myself. I’m Skrub, the trainer with the most retarded name in the Pokemon franchise.

XD Seriously. “Skrub”…*snorts*


EAGUN:… it wasn’t all “email this, drive there, nuke that,” it was good old fashioned gumption. I remember my father telling me: “Boy, you’ll never amount to anything if you don’t…”

Oh hell, we’ve lost him. Wes, battle please.

Another instance in which I don’t know why I laughed, but laugh I did. ^^


FURRET: (Points spoons at Eagun) Psybeam please, please! God, please!

LMAO…That Furret is just…hell yes. ^^


Nascour used the last of the loo roll too.

I don’t know what maks me laugh more, that or what immediately followed it:


Then I realised there’s no such thing as a toilet in Pokemon. What the hell have I been sitting on this whole time?!


RUI: (Snort) We’ll get their PDA number too, we‘re just running a little late is all.
MICHAEL: There’s a star in “P*DA” you know?

*LOUD snort*

Oh, and before I go...*huggles jubilantly for referencing that song* Bah, it just occurred to me that I haven't watched Holy Grail even once yet this year! >< *goes to remedy that*

lisalover
4th February 2006, 9:00 PM
I've said it before and i'll say it again this fic is by far without a dout the funniest thing i've ever read. I cry when i read the chapters.

Highlights:

The nights of the round table song paradoy was ROLF

The meeting with Michael(will Rui ever get away from total idiots)

Trudly being hit in the crotch(yeah mor crotch shots)

and finally the whole battle scene with hitmontop was just utter laughter and tears.

Keep up the good work as i really love having a good laugh and your fic gives it to me.

Angeling
5th February 2006, 1:20 AM
Holy space monkeys, Batman! Fanart, looooook!

http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/28611419/

From Terra (raidragonair), of course it's on DA that way i can fave it ^.^

*Elated now* Uh, yeah, this fic is my baby!

ROFL. That animation is just.. wow. Hilarious that one cannot help but let out a loud laugh IRL. >_>;

Seriously. It's a great fanart by Terra. Great imagery of that scene.. xDD I think anyone would have that image, somewhere along those lines.

xXFallenButterflyXx
5th February 2006, 3:20 AM
WES: (Cackles) That’ll teach you to take my place and become everyone’s favourite Snagger, an’ get all the fanfics and fanart you want while I lay in a corner rolled up in a ball completely forgotten, ignored… forgotten, I could really use a dictwhatchamacallit about now, and for longed!

Hey, Wes said something smart!


Wes: Wait, now I’ve made myself sad (Wimpers)

-.- And he just killed it. Wow, there were a lot of gigglesnort moments in this chapter. ^_^

YOU PUT THE AUTHOR IN AUTHORITY, BABY!

~;173; Fallen

Colosseum Heroine 1991
14th February 2006, 12:09 AM
Oh my goodness, I just can't stop laughing! I really couldn't picture Wes being, well...that idiotic, but it makes the story even funnier! I'm working on a comical Colosseum fic myself(haven't posted it yet), but this is WAY funnier than mine! Like a hundred times more! Keep it up, Yoru Ryu!

Fav quote from this act: "Gah, the-the plotline... it's died!"

Myuuvuirocon
15th February 2006, 10:15 PM
I couldn't stop laughing for a bit... and I'm having laughing out bursts right now! Worst of all, I think my mom is gonna have me do da spellin' bee (more like force) and... heh.. an'.... hold on... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*ahem*

well, I'm okay. Like I said, I'm havin' random out bursts- ahem, my fav. part was the song! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!

pokeinuyasha
15th February 2006, 10:39 PM
He he, I like the Furret! I hope the other Shadow Pokemon will be demented too ... and more hilarious! If they be more retarded, I will die!

Guitar dude bill
16th February 2006, 12:17 PM
That was soooo funny. You've got michael now. Hilarious. If the noms for winter awards are still up, I'm nominating this for best comedy fic.

Can I be on the PMing list when the next chaps up?

Yoru Ryu
16th February 2006, 5:20 PM
Colosseum Heroine 1991: You're doing a Colosseum comedy fic too? That'd be so great to see!

Guitar dude bill: I don't really understand the Christmas Awards *dumbarse* but i keep hearing there's a week or more left, but i dunno ^^; I'll add you to the PM list too ^^

^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Our computer’s being a **** again. It’s creating disk boot errors on me, and it took me 85 tries to turn it on yesterday! 85! And when it’s finally on you can’t leave it for five minutes ‘cause it’ll crash again. It’s just one thing after another with this computer.

Anyway, has it been long since I last updated this? I can’t remember… I’ll have to look at the post dates, hmmm.


Pokemon Colosseum
Subtext is an essential part of life.


Act: 8
Scene: Read label on back of fic for nutritious information.

MICHAEL: I even got their P*DA number. Shows you who they like best now, eh?
RUI: (Snort) We’ll get their PDA number too, we‘re just running a little late is all.
MICHAEL: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Look, I have to go and be around… normal people now (Leaves)
RUI: Brat.
WES: Hey, was that your son?
RUI: (Stomps on Wes’ foot)
WES: Eee!
RUI: Let’s just go and say hi to grandma and be off.

Wes and the group enter Eagun and Bella’s house.

WES: Hi, Eagun!
EAGUN: (Bypasses Wes) Rui, my dear!
WES: …
RUI: Hi, grandad.
EAGUN: (Hugs Rui, back cracks) Ah, god, my back!
BELLA: Dear! Be careful. (Turns to Wes) Well, aren’t you just the cutest thing?!
WES: Cute? Really? (Kicks feet out) Rui says I’m a moron.

Bella pulls Wes down on the sofa next to her.

BELLA: Well, don’t you listen to her, sweetie. She’s just hormonal… she’s at that age.
RUI: Grandma!
BELLA: With all that testosterone and manly charm you exude it’s all she can do to keep her hands off you… dearest.
RUI: G-grandma, stop!
WES: (Shifts uncomfortably) But she’s always touching me… and it hurts.
BELLA: (Grabs Wes in a bear hug) Touch doesn’t have to hurt.
RUI: Oh. My. God.
UMBREON: Should we give you some… “alone time?”
BELLA: (Rubs Wes’ head) And I bet the fangirls are no better.
AUDIENCE: All this sexual frustration is interesting.
EAGUN: It’s not my fault she has the sexual appetite the size of Evice!

I think that’s enough of the vague sexual urges…

BELLA: Take it now!

And enough of the blatant sexual urges, thank you very much.

BELLA: Oh, fine. Here! I knitted you all jumpers!
WES: Yay!

Wes puts his jumper on.

WES’S JUMPER: “You’re just jealous because the voices are talking to me.”
RUI: (Points at her jumper) I’m not wearing that!
RUI’S JUMPER: “I’m not a *****; I’m the *****.”
UMBREON: Aren’t grandparents supposed to knit stuff with your initials on?
BELLA: I made your pokemon some too.

The pokemon put their jumpers on, some happily, some not so. You can figure out which ones for yourself.

UMBREON’S JUMPER: “I’m only here because I have to be.”
ESPEON’S JUMPER: “Sarcasm is the greatest! Hooray.”
MAKUHITA’S JUMPER: “F.B.I. Female Body Inside.”
CROCONAW’S JUMPER: “I’m only one thing. You’re just seeing double.”
FURRET’S JUMPER: “My mind works on a different frequency than yours.”

You can just imagine what they all look like in jumpers three sizes too big. Yes, imagine. You must have one if you’ve read all the way up to Act eight.

UMBREON: It doesn’t get much gayer than this.
ESPEON: I’ll advance the plot. We’ve come to get your PDA number.
UMBREON: Or was it to discuss purifying Shadow Pokemon?
EAGUN: I have a PDA!
WES: I don’t…
EAGUN: What’s that then?
WES: (Pulls out PDA) This?
UMBREON: That’s a PDA, Wes.
WES: It is? I’ve been using it as a cheese grater.
ESPEON: Wonderful.
AUDIENCE: We often wonder how Wes can even make an articulate sentence sometimes.

I wonder that too… and stop interrupting!

AUDIENCE: Geez, someone’s in a bad mood today.
EAGUN: It doesn’t work anymore.
AUDIENCE: Of course it doesn’t! It’s full of cheese!
YORU: (Growls and brandishes whip)
AUDIENCE: Shutting up.
EAGUN: We’ll have to write our number down on some paper for you. Do you have any?

Wes goes into his “Items” option.

WES: I have two pokeballs, an orange crayon, an old Army Man figure and some bubblegum stuck to the side of whatever it is all these items are kept in.
UMBREON: Now that sounded like an articulate sentence, and it wasn’t too silly either.
WES: And one Pound to buy a Lottery ticket with! (Giggles)
ESPEON: Spoke too soon.
RUI: So, no. No paper.
BELLA: I’ll knit you some.
RUI: You can’t knit paper!
BELLA: (Proceeds to prove Rui wrong and knits some paper)
RUI: Oh, would ya look at that.
BELLA: Our number’s on that so when you get your PDA fixed, stick it in, okay?
RUI: Yes, Grandma.
EAGUN: Now off with you (Shoos the group outside) Your grandmother and I would like some “Alone Time.”
UMBREON: (Turns green)
EAGUN: And I heard there’s a war up on Mt Battle. Why don’t you go look into that?
UMBREON: Sending us to a battlefield? They just want us to die.
ESPEON: It’s probably because when Rui’s eighteen they won’t get paid child benefits anymore and it’d be easier to just snuff her off.
EAGUN’S VOICE: Hey you kids! Get off the lawn!

Later that day. Or maybe the next day. At Mt Battle Wes is skipping along clapping two halves of an empty pokeball together to simulate hoofs. They approach the Mt Battle Gates.

GUARD WE’LL CALL HARRY: Halt! Who goes there?
RUI: We’d like to enter Mt Battle (Mutters) Though I don’t know why.
ANOTHER GUARD CALLED NEIL: There’s a war going on! You’re not getting in.
RUI: But we have to advance the plot!
GUARD NEIL: I don’t care if you’re the Queen of England, you ain’t getting in.
UMBREON: Some day this is shaping up to be…
AUDIENCE: We bet Dakim’s in there though.
GUARD HARRY: So, what if he is? You’re all still not getting in.
FURRET: You’re mean.

Wes claps his pokeballs in anger.

GUARD NEIL: (Gasp) Where’d you get that Heavy Ball?
WES: Uh, I found it?
GUARD NEIL: Found it? But Heavy Balls aren’t indigenous to this area. Where’d you really get it?
WES: Uh, I found… it?
GUARD NEIL: In Orre? But Heavy Balls are Johtoian technology.
UMBREON: The Tailow fly south for the winter, and the Spearow; yet these are not strangers to our land?
GUARD NEIL: Are you trying to tell me pokeballs migrate?
UMBREON: Not at all. They could be carried.
GUARD NEIL: What? A one pound bird carrying a ten pound pokeball?
RUI: Look! Just let us in, will you?!
GUARD HARRY: It could grip it by the hinge.
GUARD NEIL: It’s not a question of where he grips it. It’s a simple matter of weight ratio. A one pound bird could not carry a ten pound pokeball.
GUARD HARRY: Oh, yeah, I see.

Rui rolls her eyes in a typical way and Espeon teleports the group inside Mt Battle.

GUARD HARRY: Maybe two could hold it on the end of a line?
GUARD NEIL: You mean, held under the guiding dorsal fin?
GUARD HARRY: Yeah!

Making their way past all the pleading trainers who must be really useless if they can’t take on a ten trainer battle, even when you can come back and heal your pokemon at any time, Wes leads the group up to the battle platforms.

WES: Oh, boy! A Battle Tower! I can’t wait to-AAHHHhhhh… (Falls off the platform)
RUI: Is that a volcano down there?
UMBREON: Yes.
RUI: Oh… (Pause) Want to go get something to eat?
CROCONAW: Baaaay! (Reaches vines down after Wes all futile like)
UMBREON: (Gasp) Rui, I-I’m actually appalled! Quick, Espeon, help Wes!
ESPEON: Yeah, right.
FURRET: No! Have no fear, for Furret is here!

Furret dashes across to the edge of platform one… yes, he fell off of the first platform. But what else would you expect from Wes?

FURRET: (Points spoons downwards) Teeeeeleport!

Nothing happens.

FURRET: Hmmm, something must be wrong.
MAKUHITA: Ya think?
FURRET: Wait, wait, I’ve got it now! Mn-hm… Teleport!
ESPEON: (Stands behind Furret, uses Teleport)

Wes appears back on the platform.

FURRET: I did that! I did that! There’s no denying it! (Points spoon around) You all saw it!

Further up.

VANDER: No! I’m never giving the Time Flute to anyone like you!
DAKIM: Ghhhrrrawwrr! (Punches Vander)
VANDER: (Stumbles about)
MAKUHITA: The chair, the chair! Give him the chair!
DAKIM: (Whacks Vander with a chair)
VANDER: Wah! (Down for the count)

They walk up to the second Cipher Admin.

RUI: Will you give us the Time Flute?
VANDER: Groan, why?
RUI: (Shrugs) I dunno. It just looks expensive. I could flog it.
FURRET: What’s it do?
VANDER: It turns back time. What else would it do with a name like “Time Flute?!”
RUI: So, I could go back to before I met those two goons who tricked me into that bag? Great! Gimme it!
VANDER: No! God, you lot look even more shifty than this guy.
DAKIM: Ggggrhhuhh! (Kicks Vander)

A guy all dressed in white appears out from behind Dakim in a puff of smoke… some dry ice can be seen being taken away.

SUBTEXT: Heathen!
UMBREON: What the hell?
DAKIM: (Makes obscene hand gestures and kicks Umbreon)
SUBTEXT: I’m Dakim, and this is my translator.
RUI: Translator? Why can’t he just speak for himself?
DAKIM: Rrrggghhuuhhgg! (Smacks Rui)
SUBTEXT: Actions speak louder than words!
WES: (Sticks finger in ear)

Like that.

RUI: Ow! Christ, that hurt, you idiot!
DAKIM: Grrhuughh! (Throws a pokeball)
SUBTEXT: Now we battle! (Imitates throwing a pokeball)

A mighty flash and the Legendary Dog of fire howls and scuffs the ground kicking up dust in a… menacing… way, yeah. He squares down his opponents and gruffs out a bark promising hell.

DAMKIM: Gruugggghh!
SUBTEXT: You’re on the wrong side!
ENTEI: Oh, what? (Looks back)

And sure enough, he’s stood in front of Wes facing down Dakim.

ENTEI: Oops, sorry. My bad. (Hops over to the correct side)
DAKIM: Nnnngguhhggrrr!
SUBTEXT: Flamethrower!
ENTEI: (Does so)

Scorching fire later.

DAKIM: (Extra crispy) Gggrruuuggg…
SUBTEXT: You’re still facing the wrong way…
ENTEI: Aw, man. I’m never gonna get this right. (Turns around)
DAKIM: Nnnngguhhggrrr!
SUBTEXT: Flamethrower!
ENTEI: (Inhales cloud on back) Gasp, choke, die (Faints)
ESPEON: Wow, that was fast…
RUI: Quick, Wes. Throw a pokeball!
WES: (Throws two halves of a pokeball)
RUI: (Slaps forehead) Not that one!

Suddenly déjà vu hits and a mobile phone rings.

DAKIM: (Takes out mobile phone) Grrrgghh?
SUBTEXT: (Leans to speak into phone) Hello?
NETT’S VOICE: Hello? Yes, I’m looking for a Claude Remaynes.
DAKIM: Grrruggggghh! Rrrgguuhgg! Grg… ggguh? (Shouts back into phone) Rwwwwgguggghhh!
SUBTEXT: Claude Remaynes! I’m looking for Clawed remains! Hey… what? (Shouts back into phone) Why you little pipsqueak!
KID’S GRIT VOICES: (Laugh and hang up)
DAKIM: (Puts mobile away) Uggghhrrghh.
SUBTEXT: They’re a shrewd bunch.

Wes and the group, meanwhile, stare dumbly at the scene; a feat that comes easy to Wes.

CROCONAW: (Picks up Entei with vines) Bay?
RUI: Yeah, there’s a good… Crocoleef…?

They turn to leave.

DAKIM: Gguhg! Mmmgggugghh?!
SUBTEXT: Hey! Where’d you think you’re going?!
ESPEON: We’re leaving?
DAKIM: Nnnggggggmmmnn!
SUBTEXT: Not with my Entei, you aren’t!
RUI: And how are you gonna stop us? Wes here will kick your arse!
WES: Guh?

Dakim jumps at Wes and gabs his hair and pulls him as close as he can in a PG-13 fic.

DAKIM: (Punches Wes in the gut)
SUBTEXT: I’m going to hit you.
WES: (Doubles over and whimpers)
UMBREON: Hah, oh, that was a good one.
DAKIM: (Kicks Umbreon in the face)
ESPEON: I’m so going to die right about now…
DAKIM: (Drop kicks Espeon)

So, that’s Wes, Umbreon and Espeon down.

FURRET: Um… if I close my eyes he can’t see me!
DAKIM: (Wallops Furret)

Furret down.

CROCONAW: Bay-leef?
DAKIM: (Smacks Croconaw)

Croconaw down.

RUI: I refuse to say anything brainless before going down!
DAKIM: (Karate chops Rui)

And, my god! Even Rui’s down for the count, leaving Makuhita.

MAKUHITA: Heheheheheh. (Kicks Dakim in the crotch)

Dakim down-no wait! Sorry. Nothing happens.

MAKUHITA: What the Jesus?
DAKIM: Grrrugghg! Guhguhguhguhguhguh!
SUBTEXT: Wearing a cup. Hahahahahahah!
DAKIM: (Headbuts Makuhita)

Makuhita down. Wow.

DAKIM: (Rubs hands off)
SUBTEXT: Have fun? (Claps Dakim on the back)
DAKIM: (Coughs out a chicken bone) Gah, oh man. Hey! I can speak again! (Turns to Subtext) You dolt! I’ve been telling you to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre for weeks now! (Strangles Subtext)
SUBTEXT: Ugh! I’m choking!
DAMIN: You’re choking?!

And I thought nothing was more violent than Rui.

AUDIENCE: Wow, that was a massacre.
DAKIM: (Jumps into the audience howling)
AUDIENCE: (Scatter in total fear)
YORU: ‘ere! You’ve really gotta stop that!
DAKIM: (Knees the author)
YORU: … yeah, I’m going down too…

^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: Unless I suddenly think of some extra crap, I’m going to have so much fun with Venus in the next chapter X3 I think Suicune has the best personality of all the Pokemon… but maybe not Furret… I love that thing XD

Guitar dude bill
16th February 2006, 5:34 PM
Hilarious. I was right (I can see the future) about the war at MT battle. Makuhita kicking Dakim in the crotch was sooooooo funny. Can't wait for the next act.

Timid Kyogre
16th February 2006, 5:40 PM
LOL, this chapter was so funny, Yoru Ryu! I'm want to know how Venus and Suicune'll be like. Good luck with the next chapter, now here are the things that made me laugh:


WES: (Shifts uncomfortably) But she’s always touching me… and it hurts.
BELLA: (Grabs Wes in a bear hug) Touch doesn’t have to hurt.
RUI: Oh. My. God.

O_O Seriously, Oh. My. God


WES: (Pulls out PDA) This?
UMBREON: That’s a PDA, Wes.
WES: It is? I’ve been using it as a cheese grater.

I found this funny for some reason :D


CROCONAW: Bay-leef?
DAKIM: (Smacks Croconaw)

This has to be one of my favorites XD

~Timid Kyogre

Sike Saner
16th February 2006, 6:01 PM
VIOLENT SPREES KICK MEGA-BUTT.

They just do. Hence, I had a hell of a time reading this. I'd been wondering what you were going to do with Dakim. Glad you chose what you did where he was concerned. ^^

And yet, I am already convinced that the treatment you're going to give Venus will be even better. Oh, yes, that'll be something to look forward to...I wonder, though, what might you end up doing with Ein? Hmm...well, whatever it'll be, I look forward to it, because Ein is kinda hot. (Although, he's no Miror B. ...)

Stuff that I took a particular notice/liking to:


BELLA: Well, don’t you listen to her, sweetie. She’s just hormonal… she’s at that age.
RUI: Grandma!
BELLA: With all that testosterone and manly charm you exude it’s all she can do to keep her hands off you… dearest.
RUI: G-grandma, stop!
WES: (Shifts uncomfortably) But she’s always touching me… and it hurts.
BELLA: (Grabs Wes in a bear hug) Touch doesn’t have to hurt.
RUI: Oh. My. God.

O_o;;; ...My sentiments exactly, Rui.


EAGUN: I have a PDA!
WES: I don’t…
EAGUN: What’s that then?
WES: (Pulls out PDA) This?
UMBREON: That’s a PDA, Wes.
WES: It is? I’ve been using it as a cheese grater.
ESPEON: Wonderful.

XD Ah, the power of cheese...


EAGUN: We’ll have to write our number down on some paper for you. Do you have any?

Wes goes into his “Items” option.

Okay, now that was really good. XD


At Mt Battle Wes is skipping along clapping two halves of an empty pokeball together to simulate hoofs.

*hugs you for that reference*


MAKUHITA: The chair, the chair! Give him the chair!
DAKIM: (Whacks Vander with a chair)

XD


A guy all dressed in white appears out from behind Dakim in a puff of smoke… some dry ice can be seen being taken away.

*snort* Nice.


RUI: And how are you gonna stop us? Wes here will kick your arse!
WES: Guh?

I had to laugh at that; I just had to.


DAKIM: (Rubs hands off)
SUBTEXT: Have fun? (Claps Dakim on the back)
DAKIM: (Coughs out a chicken bone) Gah, oh man. Hey! I can speak again! (Turns to Subtext) You dolt! I’ve been telling you to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre for weeks now! (Strangles Subtext)

XDDDDD Oh, that was just terrific.

Myuuvuirocon
16th February 2006, 9:04 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! Soooooo funny!

-At Mt Battle Wes is skipping along clapping two halves of an empty pokeball together to simulate hoofs.-

My favorite part! Man, I'm also makin' a Pokemon Colosseum Funny story... it ain't as funny as yers is! Man, I gotta watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail again...

Ohtachi
16th February 2006, 9:17 PM
Lol, Entei was just priceless. Espeon saving Furret was also really funny. Lol. Keep up the good work, and I can't wait to see Suicune. :)

xXFallenButterflyXx
16th February 2006, 10:10 PM
BELLA: Well, don’t you listen to her, sweetie. She’s just hormonal… she’s at that age.
RUI: Grandma!
BELLA: With all that testosterone and manly charm you exude it’s all she can do to keep her hands off you… dearest.
RUI: G-grandma, stop!
WES: (Shifts uncomfortably) But she’s always touching me… and it hurts.
BELLA: (Grabs Wes in a bear hug) Touch doesn’t have to hurt.
RUI: Oh. My. God.

... X3 *waves Colosseumshipping flag*

Furret is one of my favorite Pokemon from this fic. My other favorites are Makuhita, Umbreon and Espeon. xD


At Mt Battle Wes is skipping along clapping two halves of an empty pokeball together to simulate hoofs.

I tried doing that once with a broken two Poke-ball... it really works! =D

~;196; Fallen

Colosseum Heroine 1991
17th February 2006, 1:12 AM
Can't...breathe...Too...funny... *takes a deep breath* OK, I'm OK. Man, this fic just keeps getting funnier!

Fav parts from this act:

-Wes using the PDA as a cheese grater
-The heavy ball discussion
-Dakim having a translator
-"Subtext" not realizing that Dakim's been asking him to perform the hiemlich manouver for several weeks

Deathborn_606
17th February 2006, 2:00 AM
Wes is so dumb for using the P*DA as a cheese grater. And Espeon saving Wes at the beginning of Mt. Battle is also funny. Can't believe Furret thinks he can do psychic attacks still.

Angeling
17th February 2006, 3:10 AM
This chapter was pure gold. Or love. Whatever. It was magnificent. <3 Especially that hint of Colosseumshipping.. xD And I noticed some minor spelling errors too.. below.


UMBREON’S JUMPER: “I’m only here because I have to be.”
ESPEON’S JUMPER: “Sarcasm is the greatest! Hooray.”
MAKUHITA’S JUMPER: “F.I.B. Female Body Inside.”

I thi,k it should be "F.B.I."? Unless you intended that.


AUDIENCE: Geez, someone’s in a bad mood today.
EAGUN: It doesn’t wok anymore.

Lol, work..


WES: Oh, boy! A Battle Tower! I can’t wait to-AAHHHhhhh… (Falls off the platform)
RUI: Is that a volcano down there?
UMBREON: Yes.
RUI: Oh… (Pause) Want to go get something to eat?
CROCONAW: Baaaay! (Reaches vines down after Wes all futile like)
UMBREON: (Gasp) Rui, I-I’m actually appalled! Quick, Espeon, help Wes!
ESPEON: Yeah, right.
FURRET: No! Have no fear, for Furret is here!

Furret dashes across to the edge of platform one… yes, he fell off of the first platform. But what else would you expect from Wes?

Rofl. Pure gold of laughter. <3 Especially Furret. XDD


DAKIM: (Takes out mobile phone) Grrrgghh?
SUBTEXT: (Leans to speak into phone) Hello?
NETT’S VOICE: Hello? Yes, I’m looking for a Claude Remaynes.
DAKIM: Grrruggggghh! Rrrgguuhgg! Grg… ggguh? (Shouts back into phone) Rwwwwgguggghhh!
SUBTEXT: Claude Remaynes! I’m looking for Clawed remains! Hey… what? (Shouts back into phone) Why you little pipsqueak!
KID’S GRIT VOICES: (Laugh and hang up)

Rofl. Stupid Dakim.. with a >_< outcome. Lmfao..

Fun chapter/act. I loved it so much. <33 Sorry for the long response. @_@;

And wtf. How did I double post? >_<;; *deletes*

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
17th February 2006, 3:49 AM
this chapter like pure gold. PLEASE tell me Wes has ENTEI. *looks hopefully*
i know he's been missing a lot of shadows but please let him have entei. *throws self at mercy of yoru ryu*

still though, can't wait for Venus :D

the part where wes falls off the platform was funny, even funnier when furret was trying to save him.the sweaters with bella was also hilarious XD.

Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix
17th February 2006, 4:00 AM
*whipes tears from eyes* I needcto get PMed so i know when the new chapters agin, I wont beable to go to bed, I'll be laughing so hard.
Dakim... He was choking the whole time

DAKIM: (Rubs hands off)
SUBTEXT: Have fun? (Claps Dakim on the back)
DAKIM: (Coughs out a chicken bone) Gah, oh man. Hey! I can speak again! (Turns to Subtext) You dolt! I’ve been telling you to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre for weeks now! (Strangles Subtext)
SUBTEXT: Ugh! I’m choking!
DAMIN: You’re choking?!


I so want a PDA CHeese grater ^^

hammy_ham_ham
17th February 2006, 4:48 AM
Monty Python shall kill you all! *claps pokeballs toegther* Hey...they do work! *tries it with DS screens* that works too!

SO.EFFIN'.HILLARIOUS.

*bows to you* We are not worthy, and neither is that naughty, naughty Venus! Bad Venus, oh bad Venus! She sent out the call, which I just remembered was satellite shaped! Oh naughty, naughty Venus!

Yoru Ryu
17th February 2006, 12:12 PM
Yay! People get the Dakim/Subtext bit! Yay! I was worried that might be a bit confusing ^^;

Guitar dude bill: There's more Mt Battle war stuff to come too... they have yet to leave that place as they're all unconcious at the moment XD

Timid Kyogre: Ah, please, just call me Yoru -^^- I dun like the "Ryu" part much since i couldn't get an extra 'u' in there XP I'll have tremendous fun with Venus!

Sike Saner: I was going to have Dakim like Fat Bastard from Austin Powers :P He was all:

"Oh, i'm dead sexah. Hey, you baby! Get in mah belleh!"

Then Subtext came along and what have we got? :0 Ein is hot though, i lurve him... which should make it easy to butcher him later :3

Myuuvuirocon: Colosseum comedies must be like a plague or something; everyone seems to be doing one XD Good luck with yours though! I'd just love more Colosseum fics to read... that don't require much effort though XD

Fallen_Angel: *sigh* I'm a Colosseum shipper and i'm just glad people can pick out some of the hints :D

Midnight Eefi: Gah! And i'd just altered a few typos right after i'd posted it too ^^; Thanks for pointing them out *goes to fix em* And i love long responses, don't you worry about that ^^

XD001emerald: Yes... yes, he does get Entei... yes >_> He's not got Entei yet since none of 'em are awake, but he will, don't worry ^.^

Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix: Okay-dokey! I'll add you to the steadily growing list... with kinda three people on now XD

hammy_ham_ham: Oh, the Castle Anthrax... i SO have to put that scene in somewhere! And Tim the Sorcerer too XD

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
17th February 2006, 10:02 PM
yay! ^.^ but knowing wes, he'll probably abandon it in the PC XD!
i can't wait for venus.

i predict that: wes gets run over by the under subway (which is getting driven by furret) or that wes loses control of the subway and he destroys the cipher lab. hehehe... seeing how he fell off the first platform, i can tell you're going to do something funny with the subway.

Myuuvuirocon
18th February 2006, 6:34 PM
Hehehe... they must be! Anyways, I can't wait till the part where after they get off the subway n' defeat the 2(?) peons, and den deres a big *throws hands above head* BOOM! (when I got 2 dat part in da game, n' it went BOOM! it scared me... I jumped up off da ground cause I was sleepy... can't wait fer da nxt chapter!

EDIT: YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!!!! ITRPC got nominated!!!!!! fer sunin!!!!!! yayayayayayayayaya!!!!!!!!!!! good job!

lisalover
18th February 2006, 9:54 PM
SO EFFING FUNNY!i!i!i

loved this chapter like i love lisa

highlights
1. Sexeuial harrassment from Bella(sexy granny)
2. the pokeball/coconuts parady
3. Dakim and subtext just had me crying (dahm that chicken bone)
4. Entei(yet another clueless dharacter)
5. Wes falling off the platform
6. and finally the cheesegrader PDA

keep the laughs comming
lisalover

p.s. you should so put in the Castle Anthrax as I suggested in my first post.

Yoru Ryu
21st February 2006, 10:06 PM
Well, as ITRPC? has been nominated for the Winter Awards (Thank you, Sike *huggle*) i'll have to get the next chapter up and ready quicker as a thanks ^.^ I never do know which i want to do; fiction or art D: Wes or Zelos D: Desicisons DDDDD:

^_^ *happy*

Myuuvuirocon
5th March 2006, 7:59 PM
I can't wait fer da nxt chapter...! I love ITRPC?... :D

Koubagia
5th March 2006, 9:26 PM
I have to say, this is probably the single funniest thing I have ever read. Ever.

NEO GOHAN
6th March 2006, 4:27 AM
dang, I've been so busy, I haven't read this since chapter 5! I need to check this more often... Hilarious! Monty Python ftw!!! and Wes is as funny (and slightly retarded:p) as ever!
'til the next chapter!
NG

edit: oh SHNAP! if there's two scenes from Holy Grail that you must spoof, do the Monks' chant and... THE HOLY HANDGRENADE!!! (how many different ways could that fit into a POKeMON comedy???)

*marchesintothedistancechanting* "Pie Iesu Domine *SLAP* Dona Eis Requiem *SLAP*"

Myuuvuirocon
18th March 2006, 3:02 AM
Well, I just read it again... n' its still funny as ever! ^^ can't wait fer the next chappie! :D

Miho
20th March 2006, 1:08 AM
I was having trouble breathing during the "pokéball migration" scene. XD Monty Python is my very favorite movie ever. And the PDA cheese grater... XDD

WES: (Shifts uncomfortably) But she’s always touching me… and it hurts.
BELLA: (Grabs Wes in a bear hug) Touch doesn’t have to hurt.
RUI: Oh. My. God.
I'm with everyone else on that. O.o Scary. And freakish. x_X

Although it was all still so freaking hilarious. XD

Myuuvuirocon
25th March 2006, 7:20 PM
I was having trouble breathing during the "pokéball migration" scene. XD Monty Python is my very favorite movie ever. And the PDA cheese grater... XDD

Although it was all still so freaking hilarious. XD

yes... everyone who has seen the Monty Python and the Holy Grail movie has too laugh... :D I love Monty Python

I still think it's freakin' hillarious after readin' it like God knows how many times... XD

Yoru Ryu
1st April 2006, 8:04 PM
A/N: Well, I’d like to apologize for the EXTREME lateness of this act. I just couldn’t decide which Venus scenes, of the numerous ones I’ve thought of, to use. Perhaps after ITRPC? has come to an end I’ll add some of these scenes as extras or something. And then it turned out crap as I thought of other stuff…


Is This Really Pokemon Colosseum?
n00bs have their own culture.


Act: 9
Scene: The sign said to turn back.

SUBTEXT: Ugh! I’m choking!
DAMIN: You’re choking?!

Dakim drops his translator and looks around at the carnage he’s made. Everyone is unconscious.

DAKIM: Crap (Rubs head) How do I get down from here?

The camera pans in on him in a dramatically… dramatic style. Dakim turns to face the camera.

DAKIM: Get that thing away from me! (Crushes the camera lens)

Everything goes black. That was our camera he just smashed with his hand. Nice guy isn’t he?

DAKIM’S VOICE: I want my face blurred!
VANDER’S VOICE: What’s the point? You just crushed the camera.

Struggling noises are heard, followed by Vander’s violated cry.

CAMERAMAN’S VOICE: Wait, we’re still recording… I think I can get the picture back.
AUDIENCE: (Huff) And we paid good money to see this show.
YORU’S VOICE: It’s not a show! It’s… a dramatization.
CAMERAMAN’S VOICE: Yeah, yeah, got it. (Turns camera on)

I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
'Cause you're there for me too
You're still in bed at ten and work began at eight …

And black again.

CAMERAMAN’S VOICE: Sorry, my bad! Here, got it this time.

Who do you think you are kidding Mr. Hitler, if you think we're on the run?
We are the boys who will stop your little game.
We are the boys who will make you think again.
'Cus who do you think you are kidding Mr. Hitler, if you think old England's done?…

Black.

CAMERAMAN’S VOICE: Flip. I’ll get it this time!

Where everybody knows your name,
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name…

Yeah, you guessed it… black.

AUDIENCE: Oh, come on, now. This is just getting silly.
CAMERMAN’S VOICE: If I don’t get it this time I officially quit.

Celebi Shrine.

UMBREON: (Looks around) How the hell did we get here?
RUI: (Clears throat) So, which Pokemon shall we purify first?
ESPEON: How about Entei since he’s the only one in a pokeball?
WES: Gotcha! (Stands at the Shrine) Oh, almighty lump of rock, we beseech thee! Honour this humble Pokemon with your blessing and bring him back to his rightful state of mind!
MAKUHITA: Is he going to do this every time?
CROCONAW: (Sweatdrop) Ba-y.
ESPEON: (Shakes head) It’s embarrassing to watch.

Nothing happens.

WES: Um, please?

Still nothing. Wes climbs all over the rock.

WES: Maybe it’s not plugged in…
ESPEON: Maybe it’d work better if you actually put the pokeball on the Shrine!
RUI: (Slaps Wes, takes pokeball and places it in a slot… of some kind)
WES: Aw.

Yet still, nothing happens.

RUI: Wes, you broke it!
WES: What did I do?
RUI: I just told you!

Suddenly, and with no explanation, Celebi appears at the Shrine in that usual green glow.

RUI: (Nudges Wes) Don’t just stand there, ask it to purify!
WES: Oh, um, I-uh, you see-Entei needs-
CELEBI: (Dive-bombs Wes)
WES: (Clawing at Celebi) Ah, ah, ahhh! (Runs around) Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!
FURRET: Is that how a Psychic type should act? Huh, well, I didn’t know that. (Jumps at Wes’ legs)
WES: Oh, god!
MAKUHITA: Free for all! (Also attacks Wes)
WES: The pain!
UMBREON AND ESPEON: (Shrug, attack Wes)
WES: (Cries) It hurts!
CROCONAW: Baaay!
RUI: (Sighs) Drat, I never did get that Time Flute, did I? I’m really considering drowning myself in a river.

You know, I feel like doing another time jump right about now, but watching Wes get ravished in a bad way is strangely entertaining.

WES: Cruel voices!
EAGUN: Go Masterball!

Everyone gasps as Eagun comes up from behind and spectacularly catches Celebi in the ball. Well, I say “spectacularly” but using a Masterball really puts a damper on the overall effect…

EAGUN: Raining on my parade…

Wes grovels at the old man’s feet.

WES: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! (Kisses Eagun’s feet)
RUI: Grandaaaad! (Whine) You were supposed to give us that Masterball.
EAGUN: Heh, what? You’re too irresponsible. You where only even in prison a few acts ago! Besides, I’m a Legendary trainer who can’t even battle with a lousy Pikachu. I deserve a Legendary Pokemon!
UMBREON: Are you a Gary-Stu?
EAGUN: No.
UMBREON: Then put it back!

Reluctantly, Eagun puts Celebi back on the Shrine. Is it really that necessary for this commentary?

RUI: Oh great. Now we have a second hand Masterball.
EAGUN: Who says it’s yours?
CELEBI: (Throws a pebble at Wes)
WES: Ow, Rui! Celebi’s throwing things at me!
RUI: Maybe if you stop breathing he’ll stop throwing things?
WES: Mean.
EAGUN: Why are you kids even still alive? There’s a war on you know?

And why are you still here? We have to get to the Under.

EAGUN: Have you fixed your PDA yet?
MICHAEL’S VOICE: P*DA!
EAGUN: Yes, quite. So, have you?
UMBREON: We have a schizophrenic Snagger, an emotionally damaged Rui, a homicidal Makuhita, a horrifically disfigured Bayleef/Croconaw type Pokemon, a mentally confused Furret and now a slow on the uptake Entei… do you think we’ve fixed it?! (Hyperventilates)
ESPEON: Aww, you didn’t have a dig at me (Hugs Umbreon)
UMBREON: Scowl, growl, hiss.

Beeping noise.

EAGUN: Ah yes, just go to Pyrite and… do something around there… I don’t know! You really shouldn’t rely on others!

Beeping noise.

FURRET: Using my wondrous deduction skills, I foresee that we’ll need a key to proceed any further. (Grins)
UMBREON: You do realise that deduction skills are completely different skills to psychic abilities?
FURRET: … shut up!

Beeping noise.

Skipping along to Miror. B’s hideo--

BEEP: Hey! I am beeping here, pay attention to me! I have important information for you.
WES: Wow! My PDA’s talking to me!
MICHAEL’S VOICE: P*DA! (Sigh) Oh, I give up…
EAGUN: (Frowns) My PDA doesn’t talk to me.
MICHAEL: (Pulls hair out)
BEEP: “This is a message from Nett. I got word from Sherles (while our information network is still searching for Johnson) that he has arrested two of Mirror. B’s peons. Maybe you should check it out?”
MAKUHITA: That little twit; always telling us what to do. (Punches air)
EAGUN: (Gasps) You liar, you said your P*DA (Scowls at Michael) didn’t work!
ESPEON: Actually, the Audience said that.
WES: Yeah, I just don’t want you spamming up my inbox.
UMBREON: (Nods) Yes, you have no idea how many messages he gets from eBay, he needs all his inbox free for bids.
EAGUN: (Stares) What’s an eBay?
RUI: (Shrugs) This is the sort of thing he got locked away for.

So, after going to see Ferma and Reath in prison and taking the key while leaving their prison door wide open, our heroes leave for Miror. B’s hideout. Folly and Trudly watch on in the faint hope they’ll get bailed out again, but even if they did, we all know Sherles is a heartless bastard. Anyway…

WES: Wow, so we just take this lift down to the Under? Easy!
UMBREON: Yes, we’ll just walk by this Mirror. B peon guarding the lift who ironically never got arrested by Sherles when he supposedly stormed the place.

The other Mirror. B peons on the upper floors are hog-tied to chairs and being guarded and stood over by Duking… who’s wearing a kilt… what? He’s Scottish! Wes walks into the lift first with Rui behind… lets see if they can keep that formation…

Meanwhile, elsewhere on the moors, or in a cave or something.

MIROR. B: This is for you! Happy Birthday!
MIRIKLE. B: A court order?
MIROR. B: Yes, that’s right. I’m suing you for gross copyright. How dare you rip off my devilishly fabo fashion sense!
MIRIKLE. B: But, but…!
MIROR. B: No buts! I’ll see you in court (Storms off)

In the Under.

WES: (Leaves the lift)
RUI: What? How’d you get in front of me? I went in second so I should come out first.

There must’ve been some fishy business going on in that lift…

UMBREON: (Looks into lift) Is that a camera in that corner?
ESPEON: Oh well, at least it’ll give something for the security guards to watch over their weekend…
PERR: (Runs up) Oh my god! You’re Wes! Oh my god, I totally need your autograph! (Thrusts a paper and pen at Wes)
WES: (Draws a crappy smiley face on the paper)
PERR: (Looks at paper) Wow, you’re so talented, Mr Wes!
WES: (Stupid grin)
PERR: (Thrusts a transistor-thing at Wes) Take this to Nett.
WES: (Draws a crappy smiley face on the transistor-thing)
PERR: … okay…

In Nett’s hideout.

RUI: Where are your parents?
NETT: I want to say “Plot Hole”.
RUI: And I want to go home…
UMBREON: Where do you live anyway?
RUI: Bristol.
UMBREON: Yeah…

The BBC… I mean, Venus’ television station.

EIN: … yeah, and then he was all “you can’t put that there” and I was all “I can put it where ever I damn well please” and then this girl across the room started giggling…
VENUS: …
EIN: So then I says, I says…

Wes and the group enter. Should Entei come out of his ball? Ponder on that for a moment, hmmm.

RUI: What the hell are you doing?
EIN: We’re having tea and crumpets. Care to join us?
RUI: No way…
VENUS: … (mumble)
RUI: (Stares at Venus) Uh, so, you’re the people who’re ruling the Under.
UMBREON: You’d think they’d find a better place to rule.
ESPEON: (Sighs) You always contradict people, y’know?
UMBREON: And you always speak after me whenever I contradict people, noticed?
ESPEON: …
UMBREON: Yeah, that shut you up.

What is it with the eons and bickering amongst themselves?

VENUS: (Mumble, mumble, mumble)
RUI: Why has Venus got her mouth taped shut?
EIN: Because I like to get a word in edgeways sometimes. Just watch… (Motions to remove the tape)

The Kid’s Grit burst into the room.

NETT: Halt, you fiends!
SECC: Remove that tape and we’ll all die a painful, painful death!
EIN: You don’t think I know that?
MAKUHITA: There’s too many people in the room.
EIN: Look, just because I can give multiple orgasms to the furniture just by sitting on it, doesn’t mean I don’t understand what’s going on here.
UMBREON: Is what he just said really related?
EIN: (Removes tape)
PERR: Noooo! Mr Wes, I’ll protect you! (Dives at Wes)
WES: It’s happening again!

Just as Lady Venus jumps to her feet and opens her mouth Nett shoots her with a tranquilizer dart.

VENUS: (Inhales deeply) Einy, you little doll! I could just eat you alive; you’re so darling! (Turns to Wes) And just look at you! (Squeals) You might just be the cutest thing ever, and I’ve been to Disney Land! (Pinches his cheek) That little white stripe across your face! I see why they call you Streakface, it‘s so cyuuuute. (Giggle) And you must be Nett, Perr and Secc! You all have double letters in your name… adorablely adorable. Oh, my god, oh, my god!
SECC: (Elbows Perr) Heh, she sounds like you.
PERR: Eh?
VENUS: Oh, my god, like, oh, my god… oh my god!

Oh, come on! It was obvious how she was going to be portrayed.

NETT (Sighs) It didn’t work.
SECC: That tranquilizer had enough juice in it to bring down Johnny Vegas!
RUI: What?! Y-you mean… she’s sedated as we speak?!
NETT: Yes.
RUI: …
EIN: God, you’re not the one who has to live with her.
RUI: Are you two dating or something?
EIN: Oh, no. (Grabs Venus) We’re married.
VENUS: (Giggles) Yuppers!
RUI: What?!
WES: (Pokes Perr) You have beautiful eyes.
PERR: (Jumps off Wes) Wah!
CAMERAMAN: I hope you all know this is being broadcasted across the Under.

All across the Under residents are staring dumfounded at the massive TV screen and the goings on in the room. Dumbarses.

EIN: Now, let’s get one thing straight. I’m not.

Beat.

EIN: No, wait. That’s not what I was going to say. Um. There needs to be more effing females in this room. (Slides over to Rui) Hey there, wanna come out an’ see my car?
RUI: (Deadpan) Leave me alone.
VENUS: (High pitched squeal)
NETT: Oh, no! She’s gone ultrasonic!
VENUS: (Throws a pokeball)

Introducing the most annoying Pokemon ever…

SUICUNE: Leik hai!

Suicune!

VENUS: Attack, my sweety! Surf! (Squeal)
SUICUNE: lol (Laughs out loud, uses Surf)
RUI: Bleah, we can beat that. Croconaw, Water Gun!
CROCONAW: (Uses Razor Leaf)
RUI: Razor Leaf!
CROCONAW: (Uses Water Gun)
RUI: (Groan)
SUICUNE: rofl (Rolling on floor laughing)
VENUS: Oh my god, squeal!
SUICUNE: ^_^
NETT: (Panics) Quick everyone, escape!
SECC: But Nett! What about the prank call? It’s our signiture attack!
EIN: I knew it, you little rats! I knew you where behind them.

Yes, it’s hurting my ears too. You don’t need to tell me.

SUICUNE: o____O

Though, it was only a matter of time till this format came. I mean, you have to have one, don’t you? What, no? Well you don’t know what you’re talking about then, do you?

RUI: Furret, Psychic!
FURRET: (Gazes at Rui with tear filled eyes) You really believe in me. (Sniff)
SUICUNE: (lolersk8s around)
KID’S GRIT: (Escape)
VENUS: (Jumps up and down) Yayas, I’m winning! (Gigglesnort)
EIN: Oh, my… what have I unleashed into the world?
RUI: Well you should’ve thought of that before you took the tape away, shouldn’t you?

What do you see in her anyway?

EIN: Uh, well, she is kinda hot, you know?

No, I don’t.

EIN: Well, she is. And I’m not just saying that because I have a complex or anything (Shifty eyes)
VENUS: (Stops hopping about) Wait, I thought you were gay.
EIN: I’m not gay! I’m British!
UMBREON: What? You haven’t even, y’know? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink?
EIN: Stop that.
VENUS: But, why do you have a manicure every morning?
EIN: I believe in good hygiene.
VENUS: And the girly dress?
EIN: … it’s not a dress, it’s a lab coat.
VENUS: Just girlified?
EIN: No!

It’s total mayhem at the moment.

SUICUNE: atm ^.^

… yes, quite. So, we’ll leave to regroup and try to raise the IQ level a bit.

EIN: Oh no, you’re not going anywhere!
VENUS: You may have just broken up our marriage!
UMBREON: No, I think Rui and Suicune have runined your marriage.
RUI: Haha.
SUICUNE: leik, onoez! D:

For everything else, there’s Masterball… card… so long!


^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

A/N: How awesome was my plot hole to get them off Mt Battle? -__- Hopefully most of ya would have recognised the theme tunes; Friends, Dad’s Army and Cheers.

Dad’s Army was one of the best things on TV :D Beside Monty Python and Blackadder... Father Ted. Not that I’m obsessed with British comedies or anything >>;;

Anyway, the whole thing was off. I suck at writing XD Ta taa~

NEO GOHAN
1st April 2006, 8:22 PM
yay!!! new eppy! it was rather short, but hell, I loved it!
I LURV DAT CE7381!!ii I can just imagine a Celebi coming out at any moment attacking random people!!(DOGPILE!i) and Wes worshipping the relic stone was hilarious! the tape bit was comedic genius waiting to happen! and ROFL @ 5U1CUn3! can't wait fur more, LOL!i!i!i

Deathborn_606
1st April 2006, 8:26 PM
Pretty funny. I loved this.

The Great Butler
1st April 2006, 8:32 PM
I am barely able to type, I'm laughing so hard. Now I can't post the next chapter of Enigma Shadow. Damn you. :D

Absolutely hilarious take on Ciphershipping, Celebi and Suicune were a riot, and......MORE MIROR B.!!!

Yoru Ryu
1st April 2006, 8:37 PM
Wow, replies fast o.o

NEO GOHAN: It's actually a page longer than the other acts ^^; Celebi' in it a lot more to come... watch your back! XD Thanks!

The Great Butler: OMG, i really need to read some of the Orre centric fics around here! Damn not having much time! Haha, thanks :3

NEO GOHAN
1st April 2006, 8:39 PM
damn, maybe I read it too fast, I was being rushed... but then again, I have no sense of distance/length...

Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix
1st April 2006, 8:40 PM
oo
o0
00
That was awsome. " FREE FOR ALL!"
But... Isnt it "Kid's Grid?"

Yoru Ryu
1st April 2006, 9:03 PM
oo
o0
00
That was awsome. " FREE FOR ALL!"
But... Isnt it "Kid's Grid?"

Nah, it's been "Kid's Grit" throughout ^^; Act for or five they were going on about the grit on roads and in playgrounds X3 Benny lost a whole arm that way.

Myuuvuirocon
1st April 2006, 10:39 PM
Nah, it's been "Kid's Grit" throughout ^^; Act for or five they were going on about the grit on roads and in playgrounds X3 Benny lost a whole arm that way.

and no one cared... they all whistled and filed their nails... XD


WES: Gotcha! (Stands at the Shrine) Oh, almighty lump of rock, we beseech thee! Honour this humble Pokemon with your blessing and bring him back to his rightful state of mind!
I love this! Wes worshiping the relic stone... XD I almost fell outta my chair! :D


UMBREON: What? You haven’t even, y’know? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink?

XDXD!!!!! nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more. XD


SUICUNE: leik, onoez! D:

leik, OMG! it's t3h ett4ck of t3h 5u1cun3!!!!1!11!!8D8D


VENUS: (Inhales deeply) Einy, you little doll! I could just eat you alive; you’re so darling! (Turns to Wes) And just look at you! (Squeals) You might just be the cutest thing ever, and I’ve been to Disney Land! (Pinches his cheek) That little white stripe across your face! I see why they call you Streakface, it‘s so cyuuuute. (Giggle) And you must be Nett, Perr and Secc! You all have double letters in your name… adorablely adorable. Oh, my god, oh, my god!

XD!

man... this is great... :D oh... and one more....


RUI: (Nudges Wes) Don’t just stand there, ask it to purify!
WES: Oh, um, I-uh, you see-Entei needs-
CELEBI: (Dive-bombs Wes)
WES: (Clawing at Celebi) Ah, ah, ahhh! (Runs around) Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!
FURRET: Is that how a Psychic type should act? Huh, well, I didn’t know that. (Jumps at Wes’ legs)
WES: Oh, god!
MAKUHITA: Free for all! (Also attacks Wes)
WES: The pain!
UMBREON AND ESPEON: (Shrug, attack Wes)
WES: (Cries) It hurts!
CROCONAW: Baaay!
RUI: (Sighs) Drat, I never did get that Time Flute, did I? I’m really considering drowning myself in a river.

Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!!!

I usually say this out loud, it makes it waaaay batter! XD

keep it up! I can't wait fer the next chappie! 83

Sike Saner
1st April 2006, 11:42 PM
Okay, between Celebi....and Perr....and Ein....and Venus....and SUICUNE....I have to say I'm kind of mind-boggled right now from an overdose of obnoxious. But, it is the fun kind of obnoxious, so yeah. XP I don't mind it in the slightest, but as a result of it I may be kind of off. Still... XD Very nice.

Highlightses:


The camera pans in on him in a dramatically… dramatic style.

*snort*


RUI: (Nudges Wes) Don’t just stand there, ask it to purify!
WES: Oh, um, I-uh, you see-Entei needs-
CELEBI: (Dive-bombs Wes)
WES: (Clawing at Celebi) Ah, ah, ahhh! (Runs around) Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!
FURRET: Is that how a Psychic type should act? Huh, well, I didn’t know that. (Jumps at Wes’ legs)
WES: Oh, god!
MAKUHITA: Free for all! (Also attacks Wes)
WES: The pain!
UMBREON AND ESPEON: (Shrug, attack Wes)
WES: (Cries) It hurts!

BAHHHHHAHAHA! XPPPPP I must hug you for that. It really is just too awesome, and you know it. ^^


CELEBI: (Throws a pebble at Wes)

XD Love that image.


WES: Ow, Rui! Celebi’s throwing things at me!
RUI: Maybe if you stop breathing he’ll stop throwing things?

XDDD And I love Rui’s line there.


EAGUN: Have you fixed your PDA yet?
MICHAEL’S VOICE: P*DA!

AND HOW IN THE HELL DID HE PRONOUNCE THAT ASTERISK?! XD Awesome.


FURRET: Using my wondrous deduction skills, I foresee that we’ll need a key to proceed any further. (Grins)
UMBREON: You do realise that deduction skills are completely different skills to psychic abilities?
FURRET: … shut up!

“Shut up” remains one of my favorite responses to anything, ever.


Beeping noise.

Skipping along to Miror. B’s hideo--

BEEP: Hey! I am beeping here, pay attention to me! I have important information for you.

XD The “beep” as a charactr, however briefly. That is just too damn awesome.

Although it reads a little stranger on my end because I happen to have a cat named Beep. O_o But you couldn’t have known that.


PERR: (Runs up) Oh my god! You’re Wes! Oh my god, I totally need your autograph! (Thrusts a paper and pen at Wes)
WES: (Draws a crappy smiley face on the paper)
PERR: (Looks at paper) Wow, you’re so talented, Mr Wes!
WES: (Stupid grin)
PERR: (Thrusts a transistor-thing at Wes) Take this to Nett.
WES: (Draws a crappy smiley face on the transistor-thing)
PERR: … okay…

XD Possibly my favorite moment of the chapter.


EIN: … yeah, and then he was all “you can’t put that there” and I was all “I can put it where ever I damn well please” and then this girl across the room started giggling…


EIN: Look, just because I can give multiple orgasms to the furniture just by sitting on it, doesn’t mean I don’t understand what’s going on here.

At both of those: O_______o;;;


VENUS: Oh, my god, like, oh, my god… oh my god!

Oh, come on! It was obvious how she was going to be portrayed.

XDD Yeah. But it was still fricking funny. XP


EIN: Now, let’s get one thing straight. I’m not.

Beat.

EIN: No, wait. That’s not what I was going to say.

O_O

…Actually, maybe that’s my favorite moment of the chapter. XD


SUICUNE: Leik hai!



…Merde. XD

Colosseum Heroine 1991
2nd April 2006, 12:51 AM
God this is funny! I'm still laughing!


WES: Gotcha! (Stands at the Shrine) Oh, almighty lump of rock, we beseech thee! Honour this humble Pokemon with your blessing and bring him back to his rightful state of mind!

BOW TO THE ALMIGHTY SACRED ROCK!!! XD


WES: Oh, um, I-uh, you see-Entei needs-
CELEBI: (Dive-bombs Wes)
WES: (Clawing at Celebi) Ah, ah, ahhh! (Runs around) Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!
FURRET: Is that how a Psychic type should act? Huh, well, I didn’t know that. (Jumps at Wes’ legs)
WES: Oh, god!
MAKUHITA: Free for all! (Also attacks Wes)
WES: The pain!
UMBREON AND ESPEON: (Shrug, attack Wes)
WES: (Cries) It hurts!

Poor Wes... But you just can't help laughing!


Meanwhile, elsewhere on the moors, or in a cave or something.

MIROR. B: This is for you! Happy Birthday!
MIRIKLE. B: A court order?
MIROR. B: Yes, that’s right. I’m suing you for gross copyright. How dare you rip off my devilishly fabo fashion sense!
MIRIKLE. B: But, but…!
MIROR. B: No buts! I’ll see you in court (Storms off)

Ha, ha, I always thought Mirakle B. would get sued someday...


SUICUNE: lol (Laughs out loud, uses Surf)

How'd you know I wanted to use that personality for a (different) character in my colo fanfic?! You probably do it much better than me though...

This fic is certainly the funniest thing I've ever seen/read! Can't wait for the next chapter!

Miho
2nd April 2006, 1:04 AM
ROFLMFAO! That was WONDERFULLY MAGNIFICENT!!!


Oh, almighty lump of rock, we beseech thee! Honour this humble Pokemon with your blessing and bring him back to his rightful state of mind!
I'm going to say that to the game now. =D

PERR: (Runs up) Oh my god! You’re Wes! Oh my god, I totally need your autograph! (Thrusts a paper and pen at Wes)
WES: (Draws a crappy smiley face on the paper)
PERR: (Looks at paper) Wow, you’re so talented, Mr Wes!
WES: (Stupid grin)
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

EIN: Now, let’s get one thing straight. I’m not.

Beat.

EIN: No, wait. That’s not what I was going to say.
*laughs to death*

EIN: Look, just because I can give multiple orgasms to the furniture just by sitting on it, doesn’t mean I don’t understand what’s going on here.

Holy s***. O.O *chokes*

UMBREON: What? You haven’t even, y’know? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink?
Why am I suddenly reminded of Futurama? O____o And that was wrongly hilarious. 8D

VENUS: Attack, my sweety! Surf! (Squeal)
SUICUNE: lol (Laughs out loud, uses Surf)
RUI: Bleah, we can beat that. Croconaw, Water Gun!
CROCONAW: (Uses Razor Leaf)
RUI: Razor Leaf!
CROCONAW: (Uses Water Gun)
RUI: (Groan)
SUICUNE: rofl (Rolling on floor laughing)
VENUS: Oh my god, squeal!
SUICUNE: ^_^
XDDD How'd the Croconaw use Razor Leaf? And how'd Suicune say "^_^"?! Weeeeirdish. But again, HILARIOUS! XD

You don't suck at writing. You're one of the most hilarious writers of all time. =D

At least, most hilarious fanfic writers of all time. =D

The Big Al
2nd April 2006, 1:09 AM
Another awsome chapter. I was laughing my head off all the way.

I especially loved the PDA/P*DA gag and the Pokemon dogpiling Wes.

The Great Butler
2nd April 2006, 1:24 AM
EIN: Look, just because I can give multiple orgasms to the furniture just by sitting on it, doesn’t mean I don’t understand what’s going on here.


This is possibly one of the most awesome fan fic quotes ever.

(gives out Butler Empire banquet cake)

NEO GOHAN
2nd April 2006, 3:13 AM
that part where Wes gets attacked reminds me off an episode of Ed, Edd, & Eddy (which I'm banned from watching for copying Ed too much) where Johnny 2x4 is all crazy and jump on Ed...

Johnny 2x4: (jumps on Ed and starts chewing at his head)
Ed: IT'S LIKE A BAD ITCH, EDDY!!! AHHH GET'IMOFFMEGET'IMOFFMEGET'IMOFFME AHHHHHH!

hammy_ham_ham
2nd April 2006, 4:03 AM
*giggle giggle, snort snort* Oh the evil of what reading this after hearing 'SSBM humor' does to you... Hillarious! I nearly died of laughter at the 'let's get somethinrg straight. I'm not' and the furniture org thing! HAHA!

Yoru Ryu
2nd April 2006, 9:56 AM
I wonder if people still remember Wes is walking around with a pink Snag Machine... :D Ein freaks people out too... :D :D :D

Myuuvu: OMG, i should've put the "Say no more, say no more" part in. Drat! You have to sat the "Getitoff" it real highpitched too X3

Sike Saner: This act was a little more... random... than most ^^; Ein's a walking libido though. People just misunderstand what he's saying about "sticking things places" XD

Colosseum Hereonie 1991: Awww, damn. Do you spell it "Mirakle. B"? ;_; How is your fic coming anyway? Still doing it?

Miho: I didn't think as many people would like the rock worshiping as they did XD The "Nudge, nudge" scene is from a Monty Pythong sketch... one of the better known ones too ^.^ *gasp* And i have to do the Dead Parrot sketch too! Okay, now i'm rambling... ^^;

NEO GOHAN: Aww, i don't watch EEAE. If i did, i'd have to sit downstairs with the rest of the family... and that really isn't my thing. I'm the creepy loner who lives on the computer XD

Kiseki
2nd April 2006, 4:03 PM
Great chappie, Yoru! ^^ I actually liked this fic the best... since the Kids Grid were more involved. *is a Kids Grid fan* (I liked the part between Perr and Wes... ^^; ) I hope you update soon!
~Maseki

Koubagia
2nd April 2006, 4:06 PM
Another excellent chapter, Yoru. It's waaay to random to do a full review, but I can say that this is the funniest thing I have read on the forum, and coming from the owner of the Caption Contest, forgive my vanity, but that's saying something ;). Will we ever find out what Crocoleef actually is?

~*Myuu the Ryuu*~
2nd April 2006, 4:41 PM
This is so hilarious! especially:

WES: (Leaves the lift)
RUI: What? How’d you get in front of me? I went in second so I should come out first.

There must’ve been some fishy business going on in that lift…

ROFL.

the chat speak suicune was also funny :D
I can't wait for raikou. seriously. It's a shame the British attitude was already taken by Ein, but oh well!

P.S. I think i know how ho-oh will destroy the helicopter... Don't wanna say it, but i think it's something most birds do to people that annoy them alot.

Colosseum Heroine 1991
2nd April 2006, 7:07 PM
Colosseum Hereonie 1991: Awww, damn. Do you spell it "Mirakle. B"? ;_; How is your fic coming anyway? Still doing it?

I've been looking around and it is spelled "Mirikle B." Sorry for spelling it incorrectly(That's got to be one of the most confusing names to spell in the entire game). And yes, I am still writing my fanfic. I'm far into the 4th chapter(just wrote the scene where Wes snags the shadow Furret) and with the length of each chapter(around 20 pages) I can split each up into about 3 parts. I just feel like I should start posting it when I'm near the end because I usually don't stay loyal to whatever I'm writing(started writing a serious colo fanfic then abandoned it for one on XD001, and then I abadoned that one for the comical colo fanfic I'm writing now. I seem to be staying loyal to it for the time being).

Yoru Ryu
2nd April 2006, 9:13 PM
Maseki: The Kid's Grid are love! <3 We all know Perr's the best :D

Tachyon: I know what Crocoleef is... but i doubt anyone else will find out till i get to the extras part of the fic >D

~*Rekkuza Ryuu*~: Raikou is a little obvios personalitywise if you think of how a lot of Electric types are portrayed. Yeah, Ho-Oh... haha, that's a total innuendo wauting to happen XD

Colosseum Hereonie 1991: I really didn't have a clue how it was spelt myself ^^; I was just going by memory since i couldn't find any mention of him anywhere, and i'll be damned if i play through to him X3

lisalover
3rd April 2006, 11:08 PM
HOE EFFING SNAP

Genious pure Genious

I couldn't stop laughing and crying. You need to stop being soo effing or you will be the cause of me death due to lack of breath. Seriously it could make me laugh to death.

Highlights:
1. Dakim and the whole thing with him killing the camera
2. The cameraman trying to fix the camera and having to sitcoms come on put me in hystarics.
3. Wes breaking the shrine and tyring to his speech to try and get Entie purified was where my first tear dropped
4. Celebi. I just loved the way it attacked and threw things at Wes
5. Wes being mauled by pokemon
6. the e-bay thing on the pda was genious
7. Commenting on how Wes always came out of the elevator first. The game always ****** me off by doing that.
8. Wes's (:'s were funny as hell
9. Ein just whole attitude being Metrosexuial was effing funny man
10. Venis ans Suicune (nouf said)

You know what? I'm just gonna stop before i write the whole chapter in the reply box. Neway keep the laughs comming.

peace out
lisalover

Angeling
7th April 2006, 7:49 AM
Wow... just wow. First, I can't believe I waited until now to read this. ;o;!!

But wonderful chapter once again. I loved especially the parts where Wes is practically worshipping the relic stone and then Celebi throwing stones at him. Priceless moment.

Awww.. did Wes lose that chatspeaking Suicune? *falls over laughing*

Sapphire Ocean Princess
7th April 2006, 10:41 AM
Loving the story Yoru! ^^



VENUS: (Inhales deeply) Einy, you little doll! I could just eat you alive; you’re so darling! (Turns to Wes) And just look at you! (Squeals) You might just be the cutest thing ever, and I’ve been to Disney Land! (Pinches his cheek) That little white stripe across your face! I see why they call you Streakface, it‘s so cyuuuute. (Giggle) And you must be Nett, Perr and Secc! You all have double letters in your name… adorablely adorable. Oh, my god, oh, my god!


I thought I was weird. O_o

;359; : Which you are.


WES: But, but I don’t have any Pokemon.
RUI: Oh not this again… Wes! You have an Espeon and Umbreon! Two of the most sought after Eeveeloutions! (Throws arms in the air) I mean come on! Eevee’s are rare enough as it is in the Pokemon world let alone here in Orre. The only place Eevees are in abundance are Mary-Sue fanfics where they are the most powerful of ALL the ’loutions, not to mention the fact they’re too friggin’ adorable for words with darling little voices. I wouldn’t be surprised if an Eevee could beat Mewtwo in some of these hogwash fics! Wes! You have two Pokemon!


Eeveelutionsaren't THAT rare!

;134; : *glares at me*


WES: (Eyes well up) I-I was just playing, playing catch with Croconaw with this red and white ball I found… and then he was gone! (Wails)
BLUNO: You idiot! You just Snagged my Croconaw!
RUI: I thought it was a Bayleef?
BLUNO: It’s a Croconaw.

WAIT! What the-? Wes jus Snagged a Pokemon? Quick, check to see if Hell froze over!

Nice one Wes. ^^


RUI: (Looks around) How fun, a scrap heap.
WORKER: Oi! We’re working hard here y‘know!
RUI: No, you’re not. You’re eating a sandwich.
WORKER: (Looks down at sandwich) I’m on my break.
UMBREON: Hmm, yes. I bet you’ve been on your break for the last six months too.
WORKER: Who told you?!

I must hire that Umbreon for my, "Know Your Stars : Pokemon Style!" fic. Get lots 'o info on Wesly-kun. *giggles*


RUI: Look at the size of this gear! It must be twice the size of a human and ten times the weight. Wes, put it in your pocket.
WES: Okay!

How does Wes fit that? O.o


FURRET: Psychic! (Holds spoons out)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: Psybeam! (Waves spoons about again)
UMBREON: …
FURRET: Er, Psywave? (Shakes spoons)
ESPEON: …
FURRET: (Thrusts spoons out) Aveda Kedavra!
UMBREON: What?
FURRET: Oh, sod it. Shadow Rush!
ESPEON: Ow! (Faints)
UMBREON: Hahahaha.
FURRET: Helping Hand! (Twiddles spoons)

What a weird Furret.....


MIROR. B: Let’s get this over with, I have an audition for Gale of Darkness. None of the other Admins got in, but I can dazzle that little boy with my magnificent dance steps. (Moon walks)

Is he talking about Michael?!

;359; : Obviously.


MIROR. B: Big Eyes and Streak Face sitting in a tree, k-I-s-s-I-n-g -
RUI: (Punches Miror. B)

lol Big Eyes and Streak Face sittin' in a tree.....

Rui : *comes out of nowhere* SHUT IT SAPPHIRE!!!! *punches me*

Eek! *dodges punch* I'm sorry! *hides in corner*


RUI: (Grabs Wes’ collar) I’m not talking to you anymore!
UMBREON: Huzzah!
WES: But you just did.
RUI: Starting now!
WES: Still doing it…
RUI: From… now!
WES: (Giggles) That counts.
RUI: Arhg! (Bangs head repeatedly on the bars)

*giggles* Wes can be tricky if he wants to. ^^


RUI: Hey! You’re that scrawny kid in Gale of Darkness! What’re you doing here?!
WES: Growl, hiss, I don’t like you.
MICHAEL: (Rubs head) We’re using this set, thank you very much.
RUI: No! We are!
MICHAEL: Nooo! We are!
RUI: Nuh-uh!
MICHAEL: Yuh-huh!


Someone sounds like me......

;359; : Yeah. Wes.

Not him!


MICHAEL: No, I’m not happy now!
WES: (Cackles) That’ll teach you to take my place and become everyone’s favourite Snagger, an’ get all the fanfics and fanart you want while I lay in a corner rolled up in a ball completely forgotten, ignored… forgotten, I could really use a dictwhatchamacallit about now, and for longed! Wait, now I’ve made myself sad (Wimpers)

Wes has a point.

;359; : And this is coming from the #3 Wes AND Michael fan.....


YORU: (Brandishing Colosseum flag and wearing one of those big fingers) I actually don’t have anything against you Michael; you‘re cute an‘ all, you just steal the limelight from Wesley… and I don’t like that. So I’m just going to bash you around a bit with this lamp.

Yoru ALSO's got a point.....

;359; : Provin' your loyalty to Wes aren't ya?

I give your story 100000000000000000000000/10! Keep writing!

xXFallenButterflyXx
8th April 2006, 8:42 PM
EAGUN: Have you fixed your PDA yet?
MICHAEL’S VOICE: P*DA!
EAGUN: Yes, quite. So, have you?
UMBREON: We have a schizophrenic Snagger, an emotionally damaged Rui, a homicidal Makuhita, a horrifically disfigured Bayleef/Croconaw type Pokemon, a mentally confused Furret and now a slow on the uptake Entei… do you think we’ve fixed it?! (Hyperventilates)
ESPEON: Aww, you didn’t have a dig at me (Hugs Umbreon)
UMBREON: Scowl, growl, hiss.

Beeping noise.

EAGUN: Ah yes, just go to Pyrite and… do something around there… I don’t know! You really shouldn’t rely on others!

Beeping noise.

FURRET: Using my wondrous deduction skills, I foresee that we’ll need a key to proceed any further. (Grins)
UMBREON: You do realise that deduction skills are completely different skills to psychic abilities?
FURRET: … shut up!

Beeping noise.

Skipping along to Miror. B’s hideo--

BEEP: Hey! I am beeping here, pay attention to me! I have important information for you.
WES: Wow! My PDA’s talking to me!
MICHAEL’S VOICE: P*DA! (Sigh) Oh, I give up…
EAGUN: (Frowns) My PDA doesn’t talk to me.
MICHAEL: (Pulls hair out)
BEEP: “This is a message from Nett. I got word from Sherles (while our information network is still searching for Johnson) that he has arrested two of Mirror. B’s peons. Maybe you should check it out?”
MAKUHITA: That little twit; always telling us what to do. (Punches air)
EAGUN: (Gasps) You liar, you said your P*DA (Scowls at Michael) didn’t work!
ESPEON: Actually, the Audience said that.
WES: Yeah, I just don’t want you spamming up my inbox.
UMBREON: (Nods) Yes, you have no idea how many messages he gets from eBay, he needs all his inbox free for bids.
EAGUN: (Stares) What’s an eBay?
RUI: (Shrugs) This is the sort of thing he got locked away for.

Mikey! 8D

Ooh, just what exactly were Wes and Rui doing in the lift? ;D *nudge nudge, wink wink*

Bah, the part where Wes draws a crappy smile cracked me up.

I <3 Suicune. Seriously. D:

~;059; Fallen

Tabby Catty
8th April 2006, 10:26 PM
I liked this chapter you did a good job with Venus and Ein I liked the use of Ciphershipping that is my second favorite shipping you know(only beaten by Magmajewel shipping or CourtneyxRuby). I liked how Ein was British I could feel that he would have an overly sophisticated personality from his "diaries" and I thought Venus would be bratty and ditzy but that "eccentric aunt" personality was really a hoot! I can't wait until the next chapter

Angel-FoX-crescent
11th April 2006, 10:18 PM
Angel-FoX *snarls at Rui*: Rui don't be so cruel to Wes or Sapphire
*withdraws claws*

psyduck101
1st May 2006, 8:17 AM
i luved that chapter! I epspecialy liked it when Celebi threw a peble at wes, espeon huged umbreon (johtoeonshipping (made up right... ...NOW!)), and who could resist attacking Wes.

Oooooooh! I want to play! *jumps on Wes and starts attacking him*

Yoru Ryu
9th May 2006, 4:11 PM
Sorry i ain't updated in a while, i'm currently not allowed on the computer if i'm not writing my NRA/CV. I'm only even on it now 'cause my parents are out of the house ^^;

I have high hopes for Furret in the next act though! And i've written about half of the GOD parody too... of act two, that it X3

psyduck101
17th May 2006, 7:03 AM
Sorry i ain't updated in a while, i'm currently not allowed on the computer if i'm not writing my NRA/CV. I'm only even on it now 'cause my parents are out of the house ^^;

I have high hopes for Furret in the next act though! And i've written about half of the GOD parody too... of act two, that it X3

can't wait!

Miho
21st May 2006, 8:02 PM
I have high hopes for Furret in the next act though! And i've written about half of the GOD parody too... of act two, that it X3
Yes! I love the God parody! It's second only to the killer bunny... :3

hammy_ham_ham
21st May 2006, 9:07 PM
I just nowremembered what episode the *wink wink, nudge nudge* was from... There aren't any pearls though. A clampearl maybe?

Are you going to do the Lumberjack song? I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay...

I snorted so bad when Wes was worshipping the shrine, oh the hillarity of it all...

Hoenir
6th June 2006, 2:10 AM
oh. I thought ye had abandend the god parody

Mio
7th June 2006, 4:16 AM
WES: (Eating chips)
AMERICAN AUDIENCE: What the Hell are chips?
BRITISH AUDIENCE: Idiots.
AMERICAN AUDIENCE: Hah! By ‘chips’ they mean ‘French fries’
BRITISH AUDIENCE: Idiots.




Dear, Yoru Ryu

I have recently begun reading this fic and as an American I feel that I must protest to following piece. I have lived in America all my life and know only a hand full of people who are that stupid. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely, Arthur Mio
(Mrs.)
P.S:I was wondering if you know what state is Canada in. :P


Know that I got that out of my system I hope you do continue this fic soon.

Yoru Ryu
7th June 2006, 10:03 AM
Dear, Yoru Ryu

I have recently begun reading this fic and as an American I feel that I must protest to following piece. I have lived in America all my life and know only a hand full of people who are that stupid. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely, Arthur Mio
(Mrs.)
P.S:I was wondering if you know what state is Canada in. :P


Know that I got that out of my system I hope you do continue this fic soon.

Gee, Canada... is that in... Arizona? Yeah, i'm pretty sure it is >_>

It's just a stereotype, that's all. Like all French are wimps and all Australians ride about on kangaroos, and all Britons have bad teeth. I love stereotypes; they're so hysterical. Ein will turn out to be a Stereotype Briton when he get's the focus in his chapter, and Duking kept saying all stereotypical Scottish things o.o Anyway, thanks for reading~

And if anyone ever bothers to read what i type, i seem to have hit a wall atm. Writer's Block is evil and i've never had it before either, Artist's Block, however, i seem to always have X3

Mio
7th June 2006, 3:13 PM
Gee, Canada... is that in... Arizona? Yeah, i'm pretty sure it is >_>

It's just a stereotype, that's all. Like all French are wimps and all Australians ride about on kangaroos, and all Britons have bad teeth. I love stereotypes; they're so hysterical. Ein will turn out to be a Stereotype Briton when he get's the focus in his chapter, and Duking kept saying all stereotypical Scottish things o.o Anyway, thanks for reading~

And if anyone ever bothers to read what i type, i seem to have hit a wall atm. Writer's Block is evil and i've never had it before either, Artist's Block, however, i seem to always have X3Umm... yeah that was just a joke but anyway if your having bad writers block try to get some inspiration, watch the first season of Monty Pythons Flying Circus or something like that.

Jolteon Jordan
8th June 2006, 6:14 AM
Oh my gosh! this is so funny! *laughs to death* *tape gets put on mouth* hahaha! These are just too funny.

Yoru Ryu
8th June 2006, 4:45 PM
Umm... yeah that was just a joke but anyway if your having bad writers block try to get some inspiration, watch the first season of Monty Pythons Flying Circus or something like that.

I was debating whether it was a joke, but that last part made it seem not, sorry XD

I think i'll have to watch the films again, they're more inspirational than the sketches.

And i haven't abandoned the GOD parody, i'm just playing the game through a little before i contine with it. I got the Krane-gets-kidnapped part in the wrong order to the rest of the plot, so that was a kick up the arse ^^;

shadowmilotic
22nd October 2006, 4:22 AM
I've been gone for a while.:(
The 2 Chapters I forgot to review were great though!
Suicune talking in chat speak pretty much killed me from laughter.;)
Here's to future chapters!
-shadowmilotic;350;

Yoru Ryu
26th October 2006, 7:43 PM
Ho, dear. Yeah, crap. Haven't been on Serebii in a while, so i'm completly lost...

But i should probably say (if anyone cares anymore) i'm back to working on this... i'd like to at least finish a fic i actually do start. Hmmm...

Nobody expects the Sp-

THE END

Oh, bugger.

Tabby Catty
26th October 2006, 9:12 PM
Oh! Thank you! at last this hiatus is finally over! Good luck Yoru! I'm going to review a bit while I'm waiting.

Myuuvuirocon
2nd July 2007, 1:39 AM
Ho, dear. Yeah, crap. Haven't been on Serebii in a while, so i'm completly lost...

But i should probably say (if anyone cares anymore) i'm back to working on this... i'd like to at least finish a fic i actually do start. Hmmm...

Nobody expects the Sp-

THE END

Oh, bugger.

YORU! *tackles* I thought you died!!! That, or you got arrested by those officers from Monty Python because you were suspected for murdering that one historian...

But never mind that! &I hope you recover from that spanish inqu-

*BAM*