Yes. My 2nd fanfiction. Since my other RS fic was a...success, being the only Respectshipping fanfic to be on SPPF, I've decided to post another one, this time...a more recent one.
NOTE: It isn't fully completed yet, but it's pretty long so, it could be a Two-shot or something...when someone clears that up for me, I'll change the thread title.
Warning: Mild swearing, shounen-ai (Boyxboy), OOCness and some illogical crack.
This fic was based on this fic.
8 Simple rules for dating my wannabe Pokemon master.
Rule number one: You do not touch my “wannabe Pokemon master” in front of me. You may only glance at him, so long as it last no more than three seconds.
“Satoshi~! Could you help me and Bari-chan get the washing?” Hanako cheerfully asked her son. Satoshi, who was sitting with Shuu and Sachiko, nodded and agreed to assist his mother.
“S-Satoshi-kuuun~!” Sachiko groaned as she wrapped her arms around Satoshi’s waist, “Don’t go. I want you to stay so we can chat about stuff!!” She whined, acting like a child. Sachiko was Satoshi’s current “Girlfriend” according to her. She told everyone that he was turned on her long, flowing brunette hair.
Obviously, Mr. Clueless, more commonly known as Satoshi, was unaware of the rumours.
“Aww, come on Sachiko-chan. I need to help my kaa-san. Besides, you can chat with Shuu.” The wannabe Pokemon master replied, pointing to his green-haired friend. Sachiko mumbled as she let go of Satoshi.
“Hm? What is it...Shuu, or whatever your name was?” Sachiko asked. Shuu got up slowly and glared at Sachiko.
“Never, ever touch MY wannabe Pokemon master again.” Shuu growled and cracked his knuckles.
Shortly after that, Sachiko was seen running out of Satoshi’s home screaming for her life to be spared. She was never heard of from then on.
Rule number two: I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a ‘barrier method’ of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I WILL kill you.
“Satoshi-kun~! Do you like having fun?” Naoko asked seductively.
“Huh? Uhh...I guess.” Satoshi replied, not understanding Naoko’s point.
“Perfect! I like to too.” Naoko answered idiotically. Shuu, who was standing the a corner of the room, gritted his teeth.
“So, what are we gonna do?” Satoshi questioned. Naoko grinned and pinned the clueless boy into the floor. “Um, hey...isn’t this a bit...”
“Naughty?” Naoko added, “Well, this is what fun is about.”
Her lips drew closer to Satoshi’s. Closer, closer, closer...until...
“Oi! Satoshi. Kasumi’s on the phone!” Shuu shouted from across the room. Satoshi pushed Naoko off and ran outside the room.
“Hmph. I could have had some fun if it weren’t for you.” Naoko blamed. Shuu, still ****** off from before, grabbed Naoko by the collar and glared at her.
“Look. Talk may be cheap, but let me tell you; Satoshi ain’t. If you’re thinking of ‘getting some’ today, tonight or any time, you’re damn wrong. If you do anything to him; you’ll have no place safe to hide. I’d be glad to dispose of you.” Shuu threatened and grabbed the pokeball holding his Absol.
“Eh? Where’s Naoko?” Satoshi asked.
Rule number three: I have no doubt you are popular, with many opportunities to date other people. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my wannabe Pokemon master. Otherwise, once you have gone out with him, you will continue to date no one but him until he is finished with you. If you make him cry, I will make YOU cry.
“Hmm...” Shuu mumbled as he sat on the brown, vicious beanbag chair, for no logical reason of course.
“Hm?” Shuu questioned, “Who’s that?” After many attempts, the young coordinator managed to get up. He edged himself towards the door, ensuring that no one on the other side would notice.
“Yeah. Should I? I’ve been with Satoshi for 2 weeks...seems rather mean to leave him immediately” Haruhi, Satoshi’s new apparent ‘girlfriend’, replied to her pink and sparkly cellphone. “Hm, yeah I guess I should leave him. He doesn’t seem to get my love for him...but, that’s pretty awesome...wait, you’re right; you’re totally correct! I’ll leave him now!” She exclaimed and hung up. Haruhi flicked several strands of her black hair behind her shoulders and walked towards the door.
“Hm.” Shuu growled.
“Oh, Shuu-kun, hi! Do you know where Satoshi is? I wanna-“
“Break up with him?” Shuu finished.
“...No no no! Of course not,” Haruhi answered uncomfortably, laughing rather weakly afterwards.
“Right.” The coordinator replied, the sarcasm slowly dripping down his mouth.
“Great. So...do you know where he is?”
“No. However, I do know one thing...” Shuu answered. Haruhi blinked in confusion. “I don’t think it’s wise to leave Satoshi know. Do you want to know why?”
“Because, if you leave, Satoshi might cry; and if Satoshi cries, I’ll make you cry...very badly.” Shuu threatened. His cold, heartless expression gave the young female many chills down her spine. Shuu crackled evilly at the scared Haruhi and preceeded towards yet another door several steps away.
...You know, it was funny. Haruhi ran out screaming, crashed into an incoming bicycle and was never heard of from then on.
Don’t get it? Well, poor Satoshi never found out, neither did he find about his psychotic friend.
Rule number four: I will chaperone. I will be at his side at all times. At ALL times.
“Pfft, why should *he* come?” Kurai asked cockily.
“Why shouldn’t he?” Satoshi asked back.
“Well,” She replied; placing her pink fingernailed hands on her hips, “You *should* be paying more attention to me than...well that guy!” She added as pointed at Shuu, standing several metres behind her.
“Hmph. Violation of rules 2 and 4.” Shuu mumbled to himself.
“Well, can’t I pay attention to both of you? I mean, we’re all friends.” Satoshi replied thickly. Both Shuu and Kurai couldn’t help but mumble “Clueless idiot” under their breaths.
“Aww, come on Satoshi. Puhleeeaaaaassssseeeee???” Kurai begged.
Satoshi sighed, “Okay, fine. I don’t want ya to be sad.”
“Yay!” Kurai screamed and hugged Satoshi ever so hard.
“*****...” Shuu growled, “But, I’ll let that Kurai know who she’s dealing with...”
“Konban wa! Hm? Shuu-kun. What up?” Cried the familiar voice of one well-known eccentric coordinator; in simpler words, Harley.
“Hello Harley. I want you to help me with something...” Shuu requested, looking rather evil at the moment...
“Wah! Sugoi!” Kurai exclaimed as she saw the private dining room her friends had reserved, “I can’t believe Chiyo and Reira actually did this for me- I mean, us.” Kurai emphasised the last part with much enthusiasm.
“Uhh...Kurai, are you okay? You’re sure acting weird.” Satoshi asked.
“Ohh, don’t worry. I’m just...excited.” The tall raven haired female replied, saying the last word seductively.
Satoshi simply blinked.
“Look, I’m just glad we’re here okay?” Kurai answered, sounding more and more ticked off by the minute.
“Ohh!” Satoshi exclaimed, “Too bad Shuu isn’t here...”
Suddenly, for no apparent - or logical - reason, the door behind the couple opened ever so suddenly. There stood a rather, tall female. She had slick, silky purple flowing hair. Her eyes glistened so bright in the light; they could almost burn you through. Plus, she had a voice of an angel...
“Oh Satoshi-kuuuuunnnn~!” The woman replied.
...Actually, maybe not.
“Uh...hi.” Satoshi greeted.
“...hi?” Kurai added.
“Ooh Satoshi-kun~! Are you cheating on me~?! How could you?!” The woman cried, literally bawling her eyes out.
“Uhh...cheating?” Satoshi asked, raising an eyebrow, “I’ve never met you...”
“So, who are you?” he asked idiotically. Both women fell onto the ground anime style.
“Oh dear lord, how could you forget me?! I’m Haley! Haaaaaleeeeeey” She answered.
“Haley? Who is this woman?” Kurai questioned the Pokemon trainer, “Since when did you like OLDER women?!?!” She added, shaking Satoshi furiously. Both Kurai and Haley stared at each other, sparks flying around them viciously.
“Uh...minnasan...” Satoshi stuttered.
“WHAT?!” Haley and Kurai shouted. Satoshi whimpered in fear after that. To think, this is how scary girls could be, he thought.
“Satoshi!” Cried another voice from the door. This time, it was Shuu, looking rather exhausted. “This Haley person brought me here for some strange and illogical reason. Do you want to come out with me? Maybe we can save ourselves...!” He panted.
“Uh, sure. I don’t want to get hurt or anything like that...” Satoshi answered and, along with his Green haired friend, ran out like...like a Slugma on wheels.
“Satoshi! Where are you going?!” Kurai cried.
“Somewhere! I don’t think I should see you anymore! It’s kinda scaring me..!” Satoshi answered whilst running like mad. The door shut right after both boys, tired and apparently confused, exited the room. Haley on the other hand, had fun poking fun at Kurai for losing her “boyfriend”.
Little did both Kurai and Satoshi know, this “Haley” was simply...well, let’s say...you know who.
Phew, that was long as. Be sure to wait for Rules five, six, seven and finally, eight. I'll be sure to get it done and then put it with this part (Somehow). You could think of each rule as one chapter...sorta. >>;;
Again, review, help or just fangirl at the Respectshipping love.