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Thread: From your shoulder (Advanceshipping Oneshot, Rated G)

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    Default From your shoulder (Advanceshipping Oneshot, Rated G)

    I'd say "Read and Review", but that's a given, I think. Enjoy!

    From Your Shoulder

    Ash.

    I feel like I need to make an intervention. You’ve been distracted recently. You can’t hide it from me; I can tell. You can’t get away from hiding anything from your best friend.

    And I know what the reason is. I’ve seen the way you look at her. How you follow her moves silently, and hope no one will notice. Well, I notice. Every time you see her, your face lights up. Whenever she smiles at you, I can feel your legs shake. You all fight sometimes, true, but you like her more than a friend. I know. You’ve never looked at anyone like that. You’ve never looked at me like that, even. Not that I mind. You’re not supposed to look at me the same way you look at a woman. At least, I hope not.

    I can tell you’re attracted to her. This is because I’m attracted to her. Pokémon take on the characteristics of their trainers, right? I guess that’s why I feel the same way as you do.

    But I’m not the same as you. You’re afraid of her, for some reason. Afraid of letting her know. That’s why you keep it inside. I don’t have to. She can’t reject me. I’m not an option. I can nap on her head or in her arms, if I so choose. And when I do, I see your eyes. Wishing that you were me.

    Is there a reason you’re afraid? Are you afraid of letting him know? That guy? What is he gonna do? Battle you? Glalie can beat his Flygon, Torkoal his Roselia, and I can take on the rest. He doesn’t stand a chance in a serious battle with you. Or are you afraid of him for a different reason. He seems so cool around her, and all you can do is try to relate to her through Pokémon experiences, as her teacher. You try to act sweet; I saw that ice cream you tried to give her. But those roses he has. Always feeling upstaged, we are.

    Or are you afraid of betraying the trust of her parents? They wouldn’t like it if they knew you loved her, and where watching her, right now, while she sleeps, thinking of pressing your lips onto hers, would they? Oh, they seemed nice enough. But if you showed interest in May beyond a student, then I’m sure her father would have something to say.

    Or, are you afraid of her denying you? I guess I don’t have to worry about her denying me. I’m not an option. That’s it, I bet. You’re afraid that she’ll say, “Eww, you’re gross!” or “I thought we were just friends.” Or, perhaps worst of all, “I love someone else, Ash.” If it’s anyone, it’s probably that one guy. With the Roselia.

    Why are you afraid? Certainly more has been at stake before! When you faced down the Birds of Legend, the world was at stake. You’ve saved the lives of many people and Pokémon, mine included, on many occasions. This should be easy for you.

    But, it isn’t. It is the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do. Oh, if only she could see you now. No, not the one we’re talking about now, the one from before. She felt for you what you feel for this girl. She’d probably have some advice, if she were here. Instead, the only people you can ask are that older guy who feeds me and can’t get a date to save his life, and her little brother who would squeal to her as soon as he heard. I guess those flunkies could tell you something, but they’d probably want you to trade them me for help. And you wouldn’t do that, right? Of course not.

    So instead, you stay up and watch. Look at what you feel you are destined never to have. The unattainable is always an attractive prospect. But this is more than just wanting something you can’t have. You need her. You need her more than she needs you.

    “That’s a pretty bold statement,” you’d say, if you weren’t absorbed into her features. But I believe it’s true. You didn’t need her before she came. But, now that you’ve discovered these feelings, you crave them. Like an addict. Without them, you become drained and tired. With them, you feel invincible and are your old self. The self that I’ve known for so long. You hang on her wins and losses, blaming yourself if she comes up short, but always beaming with pride when she does well.

    I feel bad for you. I want to help, but I don’t know how. If I tell her, I’m afraid she’ll think it’s from me. You need to tell her. I don’t know any other way to put it. Tell her. She’s a sweet girl. Even if she doesn’t feel the same about you, the worst she can say is no. Are you so afraid of that word that it paralyzes you?

    I’ve seen how much she absorbs you. When she was in distress that time, you tilted your hand. You let that part of yourself that loves her take control for that moment and do something that many people wouldn’t have guessed you are capable of. I guess I was a bit surprised.

    I’m worried. I’m worried what might happen later. Right now, everything’s just a dream. We’re all traveling together, and she even came before she knew there were contests here. You’d feel a lot better about talking to her if you knew that. She looks up to you a lot. She might even feel the same about you that you feel about her.

    But what if things change? What if she leaves us? Leaves you? She doesn’t have to hang around with us anymore. She’s learned nearly all she can from you. I know you realize this. Time’s slipping away, but you’re too afraid to do anything about it. Shameful, Ash Ketchum. Just shameful.

    You’re going to eventually drift off to sleep. You’ve never been good at staying up, even since you’ve started watching her. So you won’t get to see what I do. She looks over at us sometimes. I wonder what she thinks about, looking at you. I hope she’s just afraid, too. You do come across often as a boy who wants nothing to do with women. How wrong everyone’s perception of you is! She invades your dreams. I know, because I have the same dreams. We’re so alike, Ash. You want so badly to just be her hero. To save her from the bad things, and just maybe, she’ll fall in love with you. Her knight in shining armor.

    I think she already sees you as her hero. She might not say it, but you’re very important to her. Perhaps, more than a friend? I’m not sure. She is, though. Sure of what, I don’t know. I hope she feels the same way about you that you feel about her. I hope she loves you, Ash. Because she’ll never look at me the same way she looks at you. Not that she’s supposed to see me as a lover.

    After all, I’m simply Pikachu.

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  2. #2
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    That was great. I didn't expect it to be Pikachu. I should have known though. Maybe that will help me with my problems.
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    I really like this.

    Pikachu's point of view isn't seen very much, and it's nice to see that he isn't just the electric rodent who thunderbolts the enemy into oblivion and saves the day ^_^;

    I love that you reference to how Pokemon taking the characteristics of their trainers, and how Misty and Drew fit into all of this.

    A great one-shot!

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    Aww, that's so sweet. I like how you referred to people with description instead of pointing out names. Makes the reader try to guess at who it might be. Good work

    Also, good use of sentence fragments. It makes the writing sound a lot better as opposed to not using them at all.

    I'm not sure, but I think I saw some Star Wars language in it, like that Yoda/whats-his-name speaks. o.O Oh well, it doesn't hurt the overall appearance of the story, so that's fine.

    Btw, I knew it was Pikachu from the start. The part where you said "I can nap on her head or in her arms, if I so choose."
    Last edited by Rashdan; 23rd October 2006 at 4:11 AM.


  5. #5
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    Wow. Absolutely fantastic.

    I have to say, I knew it was Pikachu from the title and the "Pokemon take on the characteristics of their trainers" part.

    Rashdan is right, the sentence fragments worked beautifully to improve Pikachu's thoughts, and helped to emphasize his slightly sarcastic and judgmental way of putting things. I also liked how no names were used at all - yet we are still able to deduce whom Pikachu is talking about. It's nice to see the situation in May's Crush from Pikachu's point of view. Very creative.

    A great oneshot in short. I commend you for your swiftness in posting another read for us - thanks!
    Sprites obtained here.

    Indefinitely inactive due to schoolwork.



  6. #6
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    Awww, such a cute fan-fiction ^^

    Perfectly how Pikachu feels about Ash, I guess. One thing can be said, though. Pikachu is waay more cleverer than Ash. If May had a female Pikachu, he would have gone and given her flowers. Like in "Once in a Mauville" Corphish wasn't shy at all. One day, Pikachu will put Ash in a pokeball xD

  7. #7
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    Wow, that was an awesome fic Pika. Just wow.
    One of the best AS one-shots I have ever read.
    And, I knew from like the first paragraph that it was Pikachu.
    Very original, amking it him I mean.
    Really, and the way it was really discriptive.
    And, I just really enjoyed reading this Pika, from the begging to end.
    You are an awesome AS writer, which we totally need more of.
    ~*Uza-chan's Good bye*~

    IS SUPAH FIIIINE

  8. #8
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    I also knew it was Pikachu.

    Woah, those other descriptions of people...

    I didn't think your first one-shot would come this soon!
    Q.

  9. #9
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    The Title explains pikachu, and the sentence: I can take care of the rest. :P

    Awesome one-shot, keep writin!

  10. #10
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    that was great i could see some of thoses things come outta mays crush and i like how you described the characters and team rocket

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    Talking Way to Go!

    Nice.
    I've been following your work for a while, and I must say you are one of the best fanfic writers I know. Of course that's just me.
    Like everyone else, I also figured it was Pikachu's perspective fairly quickly, and again I will commplement you on a job well done.

    I liked the use of the "Pokemon take on the characteristics of their trainers" role, it makes everything fit in the story.

    Also, good use of sentence fragments. It makes the writing sound a lot better as opposed to not using them at all.
    I agree on that Rashdan.

    Rashdan is right, the sentence fragments worked beautifully to improve Pikachu's thoughts, and helped to emphasize his slightly sarcastic and judgmental way of putting things. I also liked how no names were used at all - yet we are still able to deduce whom Pikachu is talking about. It's nice to see the situation in May's Crush from Pikachu's point of view. Very creative.
    Icosahedron is right, very creative indeed.

    That's it, so give yourself a pat on the back for another splendid piece, and keep up the good work.

    Oh, and give your girlfriend a kiss for helping you out.


    Christian and American.

    "The two most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen, and human stupidity. Quite frankly, I'm not so sure about hydrogen."

    Forever an Advanceshipper!

  12. #12
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    Oh, and give your girlfriend a kiss for helping you out.
    Okay, "friend," where did you pick up that delictble piece of information. I haven't mentioned the inspiration for this particular piece to just anybody. Perhaps you could identify yourself, and where I may have met you in the past?

    I'd have PM'd you, but I can't seem to do that. If you want to keep your identity secret from the general populace, you can PM me your response (If that's possible for you to do; this can't PM thing may be a two-way street).

    Banner by Scenice. Origonal Fanart by Suzu.
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  13. #13
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    I've never read a fic from Pikachu's poin of view, and even if I have, it was nothing like this. This one shot portrayed what Pikachu saw and felt, and how much it knew Ash so well. Like I said before, if you keep up this kind of awesome writing, you're certain to be a well known Advanceshipping author here on Serebii.

  14. #14
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    This fic is awesome! I haven't read a Pika-perspective fic either, and it turned out pretty good to say the least! I am in envy of your skills in writing these. Looooooot's of envy lol :P

    PREEOOHH!

  15. #15
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    that was really good, i agree with Rashdan i loved the descriptions. that was really good and ihave i mentioned that i think it was really good?

  16. #16
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    It was great,i did suspect it was a pokemon,but never Pikachu.Way to keep the suspence up*impressed,but not much*!Keep up the good work!

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