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Thread: Bit by Bit, Your Charming My Heart (Songfic, Advanceshipping Oneshot)

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    Default Bit by Bit, Your Charming My Heart (Songfic, Advanceshipping Oneshot)

    In case you don't know, the song is also known as "DAN DAN Kokoro Hikarete ’ku", the Japanese opening to Dragonball GT. I always wanted to write a songfic to this song, so here goes. Translated lyrics are from www.daizex.com

    Bit by Bit, You’re Charming My Heart

    A Song-Fic by PikamasterADV


    ~*~
    Bit by bit, you’re charming my heart
    With that dazzling smile.
    Let’s fly away from this endless darkness! Hold my hand.
    ~*~

    Ash and his friends had spent another day in one of Kanto’s many large cities. A local Pokémon Contest had kept the fearsome foursome from leaving town as soon as the Pallet Trainer wanted, but he agreed to stay, away.

    After May was defeated by her long-time rival, Drew, the group began combing the large city to restock on supplies.
    ~*~
    When I first met you,
    I remembered a place that I held dear when I was a child.
    ~*~


    Ash walked behind the group, looking at the Symbols in his Frontier Folio. He only needed two more to become champion of the Battle Frontier. He felt proud, but at the same time, saddened that he was so close to his goal. Because he knew as soon as this trip was over, May and her brother, Max, would be heading home to Hoenn. Assuming the Grand Festival hadn’t been held by then, that is. And despite how well he was hiding it, he didn’t want May to go.

    “Well,” Brock said, stopping at a street corner, “if we go forward, that’ll take us to the Grocery Store, and I need to pick up some ingredients if we’re gonna keep eating.”

    May looked around the corner, down the sidewalk they were currently on. “Oh, look at that shop!” she grabbed the entire group’s attention. “Isn’t that wedding gown just the most beautiful piece of clothing you’ve seen?” she gushed. “And look at those ribbons!” Ash strained to see what the coordinator was looking at. There was a wedding boutique down the road with a huge white dress in the window. “C’mon, guys! We’ve just gotta check it out!”

    “May,” Max pushed his glasses up, “You have no reason going to a store that sells wedding dresses.” And then he began listing off the reasons as to why. “First off, you don’t have a boyfriend, much less a fiancé. Two, we don’t have the time to plan you a wedding with Ash’s Frontier Matches and the Grand Festival coming up. Third and lastly, you definitely don’t have the money to just buy a dress you can’t use.”

    “Max, you’re such a killjoy,” May rolled her eyes. “I know all of that. I just wanted to check it out. Besides, it’s every little girl’s dream to be a beautiful, blushing bride.”

    “Even so,” Brock said, “Nurse Joy said that she can only look after the Pokémon for a few hours, so we need to get back to the Pokémon Center as soon as we can.”

    “Yeah,” Ash said, “I don’t know how long Pikachu’ll wait for us to come back without comin’ lookin’ for us.”

    “But I want to go check this shop out,” May complained. “That’s the most beautiful dress I’ve ever seen! I’ve just gotta check it out!”

    “Well, why don’t we split up?” Ash thought out loud. “May and someone else could go with her to that bridal store, and the other two could go get supplies. We could just meet up at the Pokémon Center in a few hours and then be on our way.”

    May clasped her hands together. “That’s a wonderful idea! Then we all get what we want!”

    Max smirked. “Well, since it was Ash’s idea, I vote that he goes with May to that boring dress store.”

    “What?!” Ash jumped.

    “Well, I have no choice but to second it, seeing as I’m ever the only one to know what we need,” Brock said. “You two have fun, and we’ll meet up at the Pokémon Center, later.”

    The crosswalk light quickly flipped to “WALK”, and Brock and Max hustled across the intersection, leaving Ash and May rather confused about what had just happened.

    May got over her confusion quickly. “Ash, thanks for coming with me so I could check out this shop. I really appreciate it,” she flashed her teeth in a smile.

    Ash’s legs began shaking, but he quickly silenced them. “D-don’t mention it, May. Let’s get a move on. We can’t waste any time-”

    May began pulling Ash by the hand down the sidewalk towards the store. Ash quickly fought off a blush as the energetic girl pulled him in front of the store.

    There, standing in the window, was a large mannequin, wearing the most ornate piece of clothing the Pallet trainer had ever seen. The faceless mannequin didn’t wear a veil, nor did she have any hair, but that was only to draw attention to the dress. The dress had small bows made with white ribbon all along the bell of the dress. Lacey puffs filled out the shoulders, with a lace pattern down the front of the dress. Ash noted that only the top of the wearer’s cleavage would be seen, but he quickly flushed ideas of seeing someone in such a dress out of his mind.

    “Ash, isn’t that the most beautiful dress you’ve ever seen?” May ogled the dress, pressing her face against the window.

    Ash looked away. “I guess,” he shrugged. “I mean, it’s just a dress.”

    May smiled at him. “You’re such a typical boy. C’mon, lets see what they have inside!” She clamped on to his arm, and pulled him along. Ash felt his face turn colors, but turned the tide on his hormones by reminding himself that she had pulled her brother along on shopping expeditions in much the same way.

    ~*~
    Won’t you dance with me?
    ~*~


    Many more dresses than the one in the window were tucked inside on racks. May quickly began flipping through them, smiling and giggling very happily as she searched.

    An old man, balding with grey hair circling his smooth crown, smiled at Ash from behind the counter in the front of the store. “Hey, sonny, you and your girlfriend there thinkin’ about getting hitched?”

    Ash flushed yet again. “N-no, we’re not a couple,” he smiled nervously. “We’re just browsing.”

    “That’s a shame,” the old man chuckled. “You make such a cute couple. Reminds me of myself and my wife.”

    Ash felt his skin heat up again as May let out a squeal. “Oh, these are just my measurements!” she jumped. “Mister, may I try this on?”

    “Sure, why not?” the man laughed again. “It’s been a slow day.”

    “Yippie!” May laughed. She ran into the back and closed herself off in a changing room.

    Ash watched her close the door and let out a sigh. This was going to be harder than he thought.

    “So, are you sure you don’t like her?” the man asked in a hushed voice so that it wouldn’t carry to the other side of the small store.

    Ash cursed himself for blushing again. “We’re both busy on our journey. We’re Pokémon Trainers, and-”

    “Well, then you have something in common,” he said. “After all, it can get lonely on cold nights by yourself, sonny,” he chuckled.

    “Her brother and a friend of mine are also traveling with us,” Ash shouted back in a whisper.

    “Oh,” the man nodded. “I see. You’re worried that it’ll make things weird.”

    Before Ash could open his mouth again, the door opened again, and May stepped out.

    The girl had put her hair up into ponytails, instead of keeping them in her ordinary style. She lace puffs on the shoulders made her shoulders look broader. She most certainly knew her own measurements, as the dress complimented her curves perfectly. A small amount of cleavage teased Ash to settle his eyes there, but he continued looking at the dress. While it wasn’t as ornate as the dress in the window, it was certainly a charming gown. A pattern that looked like cherry blossom petals was faintly stitched in the fabric. When May realized that her sneaker was stepping out of the dress, she quickly withdrew it and flushed with embarrassment.

    Ash continued gawking at her. She had never looked so beautiful before. She had always been his traveling companion, but now she looked captivating. “Do you like it?” she asked, a small amount of color lining her cheeks.

    Ash was at a loss for words. “W-wow,” he blinked. “That looks… that looks… that looks…” The old man slapped Ash on the back, helping him back into reality. “That looks gorgeous, May.” Ash bit his tongue after he let the word gorgeous leave his mouth.

    May’s blush grew and she ran her fingers through her hair. “R…really?” she asked.

    “Y-yeah,” Ash swallowed. He may have not picked the words out that he said, but he meant them.

    May began twirling about the back of the store, feeling the dress spin around her. She wrapped her arms around an invisible person and began to dance with them, but stumbled and barely caught herself before she fell. “Ash…” she asked shyly, “I know you probably don’t want to, but you… would you like to dance with me?”

    Ash swallowed again. “Why not?” he joked. “It’s not like Brock or Max are here to make fun of us.” He stepped towards May and began over dramatizing his role as the gentleman. He took off his cap and bowed to her. “M-May I have this dance, young lady?” he asked, stuttering and laughing at himself at the same time.

    May found his performance cute. “You may, good sir,” she played her role.

    Ash took her by the hand and placed it on his shoulder as he put his other hand on her side. May placed her free hand on his other shoulder and brought her hand together behind his neck. Ash moved his hands to the small of her back, and danced the way his mother had taught him back in Pallet many years ago. As they stepped, May began resting her head on his chest, and she seemed to slow her breathing. Ash could smell her fragrant hair, and he couldn’t help but smile at her. When he suggested that they split up, he couldn’t have imagined an outcome that could have made him feel happier than he was now.

    ~*~
    On a winding road of light and shadow, even now, are you lost on him?
    ~*~


    Ash and May lost track of time, and realized that they needed to get on their way to the Pokémon Center. After the Coordinator changed back into her normal clothes, they stepped out of the store and thanked the man on their way out. “That was so much fun, Ash,” she smiled. “We should do stuff like that more often!”

    “More often than training?” a voice came from up the road.

    “Drew…” May gulped, her eyes locked on him as he stepped closer.

    Drew smirked at Ash and May , knowing he had their full attention. “I was wondering why you lost so badly in our battle today, May,” Drew sneered, “but I guess this explains it. You’re busy going window shopping when you should be training for the next contest.”

    “Drew, I…” May tried to stand up for herself. “I’m not just wasting time.”

    “Quit lying, May,” he spoke sternly to her. “You know that these childish things are only slowing you down. You need to get serious if you’re going to become a Top Coordinator.”

    ~*~
    There were just a few times where it seemed like I wanted to turn back,
    But holding on to love, courage, and pride, I’ll fight on!
    ~*~


    Ash stepped forward. “Maybe being serious all the time works for you, Drew,” he said, “being serious just doesn’t work for May, or me. We like to have a little fun every now and then.”

    “If you’re not serious, you’re never going to reach your dreams,” Drew spat back.

    “But if you’re too serious, you’ll never realize that it’s the journey, not the destination that matters,” Ash explained sagely. “If you spend all your time workin’, then when you look back, you won’t have any good memories to share with anybody.”

    ~*~
    Bit by bit, you’re charming my heart,
    A piece of the hopes of this world.
    Surely, everyone wants to attain eternity.
    ~*~


    “If you’re fine being a nobody,” Drew huffed, “then feel free to waste your time in silly places like this.”

    “Ash is right, Drew,” May put a serious look on her face. “You can’t just spend every second pushing yourself. You have to have some breaks for fun. After all, we’re still growing up. Would it be worth anything if we grow up not having fun?”

    “With a work ethic like that,” Drew flipped his hair, pushing past Ash and May, “you’ll never become a top coordinator, or whatever you’re trying to become. Just keep playing with your little toys, and leave the real work to the mature people.”

    May balled up a fist and held it to her chest as Drew walked down the sidewalk and turned the corner. She watched him until he completely disappeared form view. Ash watcher her watch, and felt his stomach tighten. He looked over at May again, wanting to make sure she wasn’t going to chase him.

    “Thank you for standing up for me, Ash,” she finally said, her forlorn look breaking into a smile.

    “Don’t worry about it,” Ash brushed her off.
    ~*~
    Even though I pretend I don’t care at all,
    Look, I’m in love with you!
    Let’s fly away from this endless darkness! Hold your hand.
    ~*~


    “No, I mean it,” May turned to him, her eyes watering. “That Drew can be so mean, he just makes me so mad, that I, I-”

    “Don’t let him get to you, May,” Ash said, catching a tear that had begun rolling down May’s face on his hand, cupping her cheek. “People like Drew aren’t worth your tears.”

    May laughed and smiled. “You’re such a great friend, Ash,” she said.

    Ash felt like he had been punched in the stomach, but like a great boxer, didn’t flinch.
    ~*~
    I like you whether you look angry, or you’re tired,
    But I wonder if it’s all right to live in such a hurry all the time.
    As for me...I’m tossed about by your casual behavior in the seaside blue.
    ~*~


    Ash and May began heading back to the Pokémon Center with haste. They stepped out of the smaller road onto a main street in the town.

    “I mean, seriously,” May continued, “who does he think he is, telling us how to train our Pokémon? I mean, especially you. You’ve been a trainer much longer than he has.”

    Ash smiled. “I know, but there are still some things that even I’m unsure of. I mean, there are some things that I’ve only started to see recently.”

    May clinched her fists. “I’ve gotta get my last ribbon so I can beat him at the Grand Festival. Then we’ll see who the better trainer is.” She looked over at Ash again. “Do you know where the next contest is?”

    “No,” he said. “Max normally carries the PokéNav.”

    “Oh,” she said. “Well, we gotta talk to him so we can figure out where it is. I’ve just gotta beat Drew.”

    “May, aren’t you tired of chasing him?” Ash asked.

    “What do you mean?” May looked at him, a note of confusion on her face.

    “I mean, your letting him tell you what to do,” he said. “You need to do things your own way, and I need to do things my own way. Starting now.”

    ~*~
    But even so, are you lost on him?
    I had something more that I wanted to ask, but
    Our talk is interrupted by the sound of cars, and wafts into the street.
    ~*~


    “May, there’s something I want to tell you,” Ash started.

    “Look, there he is!” May pointed up the road. Sure enough, the green-haired coordinator was walking up the road in front of them. “I’m gonna give him a piece of my mind right now!” May starting running ahead of Ash, shouting “Hey, Drew!” trying to get his attention over the bustling city and noises of the street.

    ~*~
    Bit by bit, you’re charming my heart,
    And though it’s strange, even to me,
    I want to call you right away and tell you there’s something there!
    ~*~


    “No, May, wait!” Ash called out, now his eyes watering. “This is really important. I…”

    I love you May, Ash thought to himself, dropping his hands to his sides, and letting his head fall.

    “Ash?” he heard her say. He looked up and saw her looking back at him. She held concern in her beautiful sapphire eyes. “Are you alright? Did you want to tell me something?”

    ~*~
    Even though I pretend I feel nothing at all,
    In the end, I’ve only had eyes for you.
    ~*~


    “May, I need to tell you, before anything else happens,” Ash put his hands on her shoulders. “I… I… I love you.”

    May blinked. “You…”

    Ash nodded. “I know it doesn’t seem like I have, but I do. I felt like I was ready to tell you, but you were running off after him again, and I want you here, with me. By my side.”

    May blushed, then moved her hand to her mouth, then giggled. Ash dropped his arms to his sides, horrified at what she could possibly be thinking.

    “After everything you’ve done today for me, I’d be a fool not to know that you love me,” she smiled. “I know you’re not really into the wedding dresses, and it was very sweet of you to stand up to Drew for me.” She leaned in and pressed her lips against hiss, catching the boy off guard. He caught her in his arms, and the teens held each other like that as the rest of the world moved around them.

    May broke off the kiss. “C’mon, we need to be heading back.” she took Ash by the hand and the two began heading back to the Pokémon Center.
    ~*~
    Let’s fly away toward the sea! Hold my hand.~*~


    THE END!

    Banner by Scenice. Origonal Fanart by Suzu.
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  2. #2
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    My heart asplode.

    Good job, and pretty nice... even though I forgot to pay attention to the song. I did notice you forgot to separate it further sometimes (you know, leaving no space between the musical paragraph and the previous one), but nothing too bad.

    And now... laters.

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    Woow, that was so cute Pikamaster! You've got the dress idea wrom the lucario and mew movie didn't you? I love that scene. Although I don't know the song you used I think the lyrics suit your story well and as always your shy Ash, jolly May and jerky Drew were great. I'm going to read it again now, thnQ ^^
    Bring Back The Golden Age


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    Quote Originally Posted by Seijiro Mafuné View Post
    My heart asplode.

    Good job, and pretty nice... even though I forgot to pay attention to the song. I did notice you forgot to separate it further sometimes (you know, leaving no space between the musical paragraph and the previous one), but nothing too bad.

    And now... laters.
    Seeing as this is my first Songfic, I was unaware that I was supposed to space the song lyrics in any particular way. Is there a rule I broke? I'm not the best, there are still things for me to learn.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hunter_RuLe View Post
    Woow, that was so cute Pikamaster! You've got the dress idea wrom the lucario and mew movie didn't you? I love that scene. Although I don't know the song you used I think the lyrics suit your story well and as always your shy Ash, jolly May and jerky Drew were great. I'm going to read it again now, thnQ ^^
    If you search for "Dragonball GT Japanese Opening" on YouTube, you should find the TV Version, if you wanna go look for it.

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    Wow, that was good, for your first Songfic this really well-written. Since I love DragonBall and Pokemon (specially Advanceshipping), this hooks me in. You still write advanceshipping like a pro.

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    I don't know how to say this...
    That was...

    Great? Good? Grood? Phat? Hip? CoolioMcCoolcoolyo?
    I think I'll go with great, especially because I don't really like songfics.
    Il Menestrello:
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    That was awesome, Pika! Really sweet as well. Your writing just never ceases to amaze me. Like a broken record player, I say, great job, awesome work, and keep 'em comin'!

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    Wow, that was utterly amazing! Wow...the song fit perfectly with the One-Shot, very well portrayed and Ash proclaiming his love for May when she went to Drew was great, as well. I cant say that I am very surprised, your writing ability is fabulous, no wonder this One-Shot is doing well. Good job, and I am looking forward to reading your chapter in MC2 tonight!

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    very well written for a first songfic also very good even though it is short plus I found Drew jerky, not normal jerky but JERK OVERLOAD!!!!!! Lastly i found one spelling error- when May kisses Ash you said "hiss" lips instead of his.

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    awesome! ur so good at this xD although i found the ending to be a bit rushed, but thats just my opinion so yea xD other than that it was very good

  11. #11
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    That was pretty good, the ending ended a little too fast in my opinion. But that's just my opinion.
    So cute!
    [IMG]http://i28.*******.com/2i7tjl5.png[/IMG]
    Banner credit goes to Azure Wolf =3


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    Whoa. Great job there. I really liked the ending - lots of cuteness. Anyway, just one minor spelling error - in the title, you spelled the contraction of you and are, "your". It's supposed to be "you're". Anyway, great job. That one is up there with that halloween one on ff.net.
    Keep writing!

    ~Zant~
    (Yay! My first post!)
    Last edited by Lord Zant; 20th April 2007 at 12:19 AM. Reason: Forgot a comma...

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