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Thread: Commandeering Love (PG-13 to R-ish, Galactic ships)

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2007

    Default Commandeering Love (PG-13 to R-ish, Galactic ships)

    Aha! First story posted on internet! Well, it's prominently a Jovianshipping (yayz) romance/comedy but also contains more Mars ships than you can shake a stick at (including MarsxGardenia and Infrared, notably, and now with 100% more Betelgeuse!), thus, if Mars and girls/older men does not appeal to you, just skip sections about Mars' many crushes. It also contains youngish people doing dirtyish things in odd locations, but that's a minimal part of the story [but there enough to cause the occasional R-ish chapter], and only in like, Mars chapters. Thus the rest will be PG to PG-13. If you find major errors in grammar please point them out, but I'm pretty grammar strict and so there shouldn't be more than mebbe one per chapter, hopefully. Please review and tell me how you like it and what's wrong with it, like length, pacing, OOCness, etc.... and trust me it'll be long and hilarious and will get better... right now the stage isn't exactly set and the characters' pasts are yet to be revealed, so bear with me. And now I welcome you to mah story about the problematic lives of the rather odd commanders of Team Galactic... and of course Cyrus and the grunts, too. And yes, pun intended in the title. Hahaha, this is Pokemon. Oh, and don't mind the bleeping-out of some words... that wasn't me, but the internet. *shakes fist* Rar.

    Prolouge (a midget) [then ze first chapter, and don't worry, all ze hazy stuff will be revealed later! stay tuned in suspense... and yeah they get longer and more back into character soon]:

    All was normal at the Team Galactic Headquarters. The grunts were gaming on their Gameboys and PSPs, the scientists were poking and prodding various limbs of various creatures, Cyrus was emotionally void and sat in his lonely office of black walls and black furniture reflecting on his black life, Mars was looking at naughty things on the Internet and absentmindedly ordering the chefs around, and Jupiter was taking an hour-long shower.

    All would have been normal if it wasn’t for Saturn. The sole male commander, who usually was attempting to solve complex math problems at the morning hour, was currently hiding in the closet in Jupiter’s bathroom.

    And of course, she didn’t know he had snuck in before the late-rising commander awoke.

    Saturn had been acting rather oddly lately, namely around the more attractive fellow commander of his. Hiding in her closet and spying in on her while she was taking a shower was the strangest thing he’d done yet.

    Namely since the two couldn’t stand each other.

    For some reason never disclosed to the confused Mars, the pair had never gotten along and always insulted each other whenever possible. They were both intelligent and hot but took every opportunity to bring the other down.

    Lately though, the early-twenties male commander had been showing a strange obsession with the female commander of the same age. Mars was a few years older than them, and Cyrus was about ten years older than her.

    Thus, Saturn was spying in on a clueless Jupiter, who was putting on quite a show for him.

    Until she got out and headed right for his hiding spot.

    He tried to move to the farthest corner of her huge closet and hide behind some long dresses of hers, but it was all in vain. She opened the door, turned the light on to look for clothes and her towel, saw his feet and screamed.


    Chapter One - Mars Visits the Hospital

    Later that afternoon, the red-headed commander drove her red T-Bird to the hospital the battered, bruised and bleeding Saturn resided at. She bore flowers and cards from almost all the members. The ‘almost’ was Cyrus, who didn’t believe in hospitals, and Mars, who was going to personally deliver her get-well-soon message. Yes, even Jupiter had sent something.

    She wound her way around the white corridors till she found the room of her male companion and entered with her Pokemon, carting gifts for the injured man.

    “Is she still angry?” he coughed out from a bitten, sore jugular.

    “Yeah. I don’t know WHAT you were thinking being a peeping tom. And JUPITER, of all people! She did write you a card, though, but I don’t know what it says. All the grunts and scientists did too, and the girls sent you flowers. I think they like you…” Mars trailed off, holding up bouquets of roses from the female Galactic members who were enthralled with their handsome commander.

    Poor Mars was the rejected commander. All the girls liked Saturn and all the guys liked Jupiter. And they liked nobody.

    “I know exactly what I was thinking. I ain’t getting any younger, I’m a virgin, and she’s hot. She’s the only decent girl on this team, everyone else is flat… no offense, Mars,” he grumbled before realizing he had just insulted the hot-headed female.

    Mars was shocked. Not that he had just called her ugly, but that he had called Jupiter pretty and basically implied he wanted to screw her. “Saturn… I thought you hated her! What made you change your mind?” she curiously asked, looking at him.

    “She’s always like right there… all hot and virginy and attitudinal. And so I get to thinking about her in a swimsuit, and then nothing, and then…” he began before she cut him off.

    “I DON’T need to know that! Great you have wet dreams about someone who hates you, Saturn. You’ll have a hard time convincing her to love you back,” she commented knowingly.

    “I don’t love her. I just need a woman,” he bluntly stated as Mars smacked her face.

    “Thaaaat… won’t fly with her. She’s feeling the internal clock, but she’s a girl. And girls need actual emotional relationships, unlike you guys. Unless they’re *****s. But they’re really good in bed. And that’s why I like girls, because men are pigs,” Mars replied as Saturn rolled his eyes.

    “I know, I don’t care why the crap you like stinkin’ girls.”

    “If they stink then why do you want Jupiter?”

    “Because she’s a woman.”

    Mars grunted at his owning her. Mars 0, Saturn 2, Jupiter 1.

    “Well, read these stupid cards everyone wrote you. I’m gonna go ask the doc when you can come back,” she ordered and left.

    Saturn picked up Jupiter’s card first and read it.


    You make me very angry. And that is why you’re in the hospital because I beat the tar out of you for spying in on me. I am flattered you think I’m hot and wanted to catch a glimpse. Once you’re back I’ll find you… I’ve got something for you.

    <3 Jupiter

    He looked over at the silhouette of Mars in the doorway talking to a doctor and smirked.

    “You’re just jealous I like her, sucker.”
    Last edited by Yeti; 3rd September 2007 at 12:01 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2006


    Very good, I think I need to keep writing my third volume, edit my first, and upload my second volume of PRGW, my Betelgueseshipping fact.

    I like how Cyrus didn't believe in hospitals, what a Scientologist.

    I don't get why anybody doesn't like Mars? I guess in my opinion she is a lot better than Jupiter who is a bit smarmy sometimes to me but I'm very opinionated.

    Good fic though, keep it up you have a good idea going!

    *vanishes to continue to write her own fic*
    Betelgueseshipper for life Yo!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Yay, review! *is very late* In response, YES, update your fic, dangit!
    Of course he doesn't believe in hospitals, once the world is recreated, there shall be no illness, hahaha... Hello, Team Galactic are total tree-huggers, trying to make a better world.
    Nobody likes Marsi because if you look at the Sugimori, she is slightly thinner and flatter than Jupiter. Thus all the guys prefer Jupiter. =D

    M'kay, this is actually finished (been on vacation for a month though, didn't have time to work on it/update), and Chapter Two got a complete reworking, it got scrapped except for the first bit. So I present you with the new, improved Chapter Two: 100% More Cyrus AND Betelguese! YAY!

    Chapter Two - Jupiter Evens the Score

    Mars drove Saturn back to headquarters rather slowly to avoid the inevitable second beating by Jupiter and return trip to the hospital. Saturn on the other hand was eagerly anticipating getting back and being found by her.

    “I wouldn’t advise doing that again, by the way. She’s been pretty angry lately because of that. And, uh, don’t try it on me either,” she commented, stopping the car outside the building at long last.

    “Yeah, yeah. I wouldn’t bother with you, Mars, get rid of your ego,” he rolled his eyes, getting out of her Thunderbird and strolling up to the doors.

    “And try not to make her beat you, all the girls have been hating on her for ‘ruining your perfect figure’ m’kay?” Mars added at the last minute before opening the doors.

    “SATURN’S BACK!” she screamed out and all the girls came running. Cyrus angrily, but still emotionlessly, appeared in the door and all the guys smirked from the outside of the main entry room.

    Various cries of adoration and care for his wellbeing drowned out the mumblings of Cyrus on how Saturn shouldn’t violate others’ privacy and he can’t afford one of the commanders out.

    Everyone went quiet when Jupiter appeared, however, and parted so she could walk right to Saturn. He didn’t even flinch as she approached, or try to run. All the girls ‘oooohed’ over his bravery.

    “Saturn… you’re back. Follow me,” she commanded once she’d walked up to him and stopped right in front of his face. She then turned around, looked over her shoulder at him, motioned with her finger for him to follow, and paraded off.

    He willingly followed her lead. All the girls scowled at Jupiter for taking him away. She ignored them, holding her head high and swaying her hips for Saturn.

    Mars watched on in interest at the scene before her. Saturn following Jupiter around like a lost dog, and Jupiter trying to turn him on.

    She led him out of the room and up to hers.

    “Look Saturn, I’m going to be blunt. We ended things a long time ago and I thought we both moved on. I did, but I guess you didn’t,” Jupiter began before Saturn angrily cut her off.

    “YOU ended things you moron! I never wanted to break up, and if you hadn’t been so selfish you would’ve accepted defeat and I’d have proposed to you!” he snarled back at her as her eyes widened.

    “You were going to propose?” she timidly asked in shock.

    “Yes, and EVERYONE in the school knew about it but you,” his tone and expression seemed saddened now, thinking back.

    “Why didn’t I know? I wouldn’t have embarrassed you if I’d known you were going to-“


    “Well excuse me! Did you ever consider I’d have said ‘no’ even IF you had asked me? Even if we’d won that stupid, stupid competition?”

    “No…” he managed to choke the whisper out, realizing she may not have ever wanted to marry him in the first place.

    “You’re just a presumptuous pig, thinking you can just ask a girl to marry you and she will. Well buster, think again. I’d never want to marry someone like you with your haughty, arrogant attitude and I’m sorry you’re too stupid and blind to have seen that in the first place,” she coldly stated in a rather detached manner.

    “But, but, why? If you didn’t want to marry me then why’d you go out with me?”

    “I… I don’t know…”

    “Because you did love me until your stupid competitive nature flared its ugly head and you forgot about how you felt in favor of getting your picture taken with me and a couple crowns at every school dance, hm?” Saturn took the upper hand and shifted the tables so she was feeling the pressure and regret.

    “No, I just realized you… you… you weren’t someone I’d want to spend forever with,” she lied, trying to ignore her conscious screaming at her that he was right.

    “So what, you decided to keep my hopes up and rather than dump me finish off school with someone you could easily use to win with?”

    “I was trying to let you go slowly so I wouldn’t hurt you… but I wasn’t expecting we’d lose.”

    “Why not?! Everyone knew you didn’t love me and I was your little pawn, I knew we’d never stand a chance against them. You’re the only one who never realized your new agenda was destroying your dreams.”

    “If you knew I treated you like my trophy boyfriend then why didn’t YOU dump ME?”

    “Because, if we won, or even lost, I was hoping there might be a chance you still loved me deep down. I loved you and I didn’t want to lose you, even though I guess I already had.”

    “Too bad your ignorant optimism didn’t pay off, huh?” she smirked as he frowned.

    “Yeah, too bad.”

    “Oh? You’re not going to say something like ‘best twist of fate it didn’t’?”

    “No, because for some stupid reason some big man hates me and I still love you.”

    “He must really hate your guts Simon, because I have a boyfriend who isn’t too happy with your little spying plot and he should be coming around any time now…” Jupiter smirked, using Saturn’s real name for the first time in years.

    “What?! No, you, you don’t, you can’t, Mars never said anything, Cyrus never mentioned it, how could you have one, for how long? You’re lying, aren’t you, Juliana, just like always?” he turned angry after his initial shock, bringing out a name he’d many times spoken in his sleep or when he cried.

    “It’s been my dirty little secret for two years and none of you ever knew, hah,” she grinned viciously at him as he seemed to be conflicted between sadness, pain and rage.

    There was a knock on the door and a tall, handsome man with blonde hair and sapphire-blue eyes entered smiling at Jupiter.

    “Get out of MY headquarters! I don’t permit visitors in this here building and I don’t care what Jupiter’s gotten permitted, I outrank her and I can override anything she says and wants. So scram!” Saturn cried out angrily at this intruding male.

    “I… would not be so sure of that, monsieur. I am sure your boss will permit my remaining once I ask Miss Jupiter a very important question,” this suave male replied with a rather French accent.

    Mars and Cyrus popped up in the doorway with a host of grunts behind them to silently observe this exchange.

    “Miss Jupiter, the love of my life, will you marry me and spend forever being carefully tended to and adored over by me?” Mister Frenchie got down on his knee and presented a rather large diamond ring to Jupiter.

    “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!? MY RING IS BIGGER THAN THAT, DON’T DO IT, HE’S NOT GIVING YOU THE BEST THERE IS!” Saturn screamed, knocking the ring case out of Frenchie’s hand.

    All the grunts and Mars began laughing. “Is that ALL you have that’s larger than his?” Cyrus asked, completely emotionlessly.

    Every Team Galactic member began laughing, except for Cyrus, since he doesn’t laugh, you know. Mars gave him a double high-five at his owning prowess. “Cyrus, dude, that was the best one I’ve heard in like, forever!” she praised him as all the grunts agreed.

    “Well now that you mention it, I bet everything I have is larger than his,” Saturn admitted, nodding his head as the grunts, Mars and Cyrus agreed with this rather owning statement.

    “Well, Samuel, despite what these clowns may have to say, I guess I’ll say yes,” Jupiter admonished as all the other members of Team Galactic gasped.

    “Love makes you weak, I do not permit this action, it shows you are a pathetic git, forget it, sucker,” Cyrus dictated, picking up the ring case and breaking the ring in half with his bare fingers.

    “Good job Cyrus! Way to show ‘em Team G. doesn’t take nothin’ from nobody! Who is this guy cruising in here and trying to take Saturn’s Jupi away from us? How totally RUDE!” Mars stated as Cyrus nodded his head in agreement and all the grunts contributed some sort of encouragement to Cyrus, Mars and Saturn or some insult to Samuel.

    All the guys asked Jupiter to marry them.

    “Look guys, I’m SERIOUS, I want to marry him and if you won’t accept that then I’ll quit,” Jupiter angrily declared as Mars and Cyrus eyed her warily to try and determine just how serious she was. With subtle glances at each other they managed to communicate without speaking…

    Think she means it?

    No, she is just angry with Saturn, and that makes her weak, stupid and prone to do foolish things.

    I don’t know, she might just actually quit.

    She will do nothing of the sort. The three of you all signed your rights to quit or leave away when you joined Team Galactic, she has no freedom of choice in the matter.

    Great plan Cyrus! Say, if I sleep with you, will I get a raise?

    That is a stupid question. Of course, do you really think I get any action? That is why I am so emo all the time.

    Okay great, see you tonight!

    Jupiter and Saturn had never been able to figure out how Mars and Cyrus could communicate so well by just looking at each other. Maybe that’s because JUPITER AND SATURN ARE IDIOTS.

    Dude, everyone knows it, only Mars and Cyrus are clever, because they’re not as hot.


    “I think I’m going to kill myself, she’s going to LEAVE ME! WAAAAAAAH!” Saturn wailed.

    So he grabbed Jupiter and ran for her window, leaping out.

    Everyone else stared on in horror and shock.



    Cyrus and Mars ran to the window and stared down at the fast-falling forms of the commanders desperately clutching each other as they plummeted down the side of the rather tall building in Veilstone.

    “Good grief, he’s suicidal AND homicidal!” Mars exclaimed as Cyrus nodded his head.

    “They are both very emotional beings. THEY ARE WEAK. DO YOU HEAR ME, WEAKLINGS, YOU ARE WEAK! YOU WILL DIE WEAK, HAHAHA,” Cyrus robotically cackled as Jupiter, it is assumed only, flipped him off.

    Out of nowhere, out of the BLUE, swooped in a LUGIA! This majestic bird dove under the two commanders and caught them on her back, streaking off into the sky and followed closely by Team Cipher planes and helicopters with Venus commanding operations.

    Now, this was no ordinary Lugia. No, this was THE shiny Lugia, a kind, caring, gentle-spirited female Lugia who had been around for longer than YO MAMMA (can you believe it?) and was very wise. Her name was Rose, and she had a special fondness for villains like Jupiter and Saturn.

    Mars and Cyrus yelled at Venus to stop pursuit immediately, but SHE most definitely flipped them off and said Saturn and Jupiter would make lovely ransoms or lab rats, either way.

    Rose laughed, knowing Team Cipher could never catch her with Team Galactic’s most vicious commander shooting their tails off.

    The red and white Lugia swooped about in the sky, dodging missiles and laser beams narrowly as she evaded all Cipher’s attempts to capture her.

    “Saturn, how did you know Rose would be flying beneath my window right at the moment you jumped?” Jupiter curiously asked him, forgetting she was angry at him.

    “I didn’t. I assumed that if we lived somehow that would mean we were meant to be together in life, but if we went splat and died it meant we were meant to be together in death. I personally am glad it’s the former,” he replied quite confidently.

    “This was a test to see if we’re supposed to get married and either way you win?” she scowled.

    “Meh, kinda. I was really hoping I’d just die, but you’d live, but you’d be underneath me trapped beneath my bleeding, torn, rotting corpse until Mars and Cyrus decided to clean up the mess and burn my remains before scattering them in your bed to be funny. Guess I’m not that lucky, huh?” =( Saturn sighed pessimistically.

    “That means I’d be sleeping with you for the rest of my days, even if I married another man? Oh my, I’d be having an affair with you! Oh I wish you did die so I could sleep with you,” Jupiter pretended to swoon and faint, holding a hand to her head.

    “Hey, hey, hey, since I’m alive, you can sleep with me in any case! And it’ll be much better! See, isn’t it great how we both win?” he gave her a million-dollar grin and hugged her, moving a hand down towards her rear.

    “Mhm, YOU win when you marry me. I will do nothing sexual with you until then. I intend to remain a virgin until my honeymoon, thank you very much. And I expect an extremely nice proposal with your large ring and to be treated well until then,” she stated, grabbing his hand and sticking it between her legs.

    “What are you doing then?!” a rather surprised Saturn cried out as she pushed his hand so it was under her rear as she sat.

    “My butt itches. So I decided to have you scratch it,” she smiled as he shook his head lovingly at her.

    Eventually Rose landed once Mars and Cyrus had roughed Venus up a bit for attempting to catch Rose and Galactic commanders. The Lugia waved goodbye to the humans and dove into the river to swim away.

    Jupiter and Saturn strolled off arm-in-arm, sharing an iPod like usual, to their favorite plane to fly, leaving Mars and Cyrus to shove Samuel into the river and tell him to never come back, he just got rejected.

    Mars 0, Saturn 2, Jupiter 2, Cyrus FIVE BILLION LOLZ HE IZ TEH LAWLRUS BRING IN TEH ROFFLECOPTERS. PS Samuel has about -eleventy-seven (that’s a negative) by now.

    Review, please. I know, it ain't Poke/Contest/Ikari/Advance/Orange, but give it a chance, they ain't the only ships out there, ya know. *scuttles off to work on her comedy and wait* Thanks for reading! Other chapters once I return from my mission's trip.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Tis update time... Now we have a chapter all about Mars' day. Yey. PS Aaaanybody wanna review... mebbe? Or should I make a Contest/Poke fic? =p

    Chapter Three - A Day in the Life

    Luckily for Mars, the next day was back to normal.

    Jupiter was taking hour-long showers, Saturn was doing math, grunts were pwning, scientists were getting attacked by dead appendages, Cyrus was cutting himself, chefs were cooking up strange French dishes, and Mars was on the internet reading dirty stories.

    All was as it should be. Later she was slated to review Saturn’s funding calculations and check to be sure they were accurate. The other commanders then had a few hours of free time before doing some important team stuff.

    Her fellow female emerged after an unusually long shower with curled hair, make-up and a rather tight, short, low-cut dress.

    “Where are you off to all dolled up?” Mars asked, trying to stare down Jupiter’s dress.

    “Someplace. Have you seen Saturn? He’s supposed to be here soon to take me sailing,” Jupiter angrily replied, scanning the room in search of her missing man.

    “Nope. And why would he take YOU sailing?” the older woman demanded, disgruntled.

    “Because he installed a new sound system on the yacht and he’s tested his iPod with it, but now he needs to try mine. And he wants to take ME,” the younger, more attractive woman snottily stated, folding her arms and turning up her nose.

    The strangest thing about Jupiter and Saturn was they shared iPods. Saturn had a blue Nano and Jupiter had a pink one, and they split their songs. Blue had oldies, emo songs, depressing songs, metal songs and a few raps. Pink contained pop songs, synth songs, hip-hop songs, rock songs, love songs, happy songs, disco, and modern songs. The pair could often be seen walking down the halls with one of the two iPods, a headphone in his right ear and a headphone in her left. That was just about the only time they got along.

    Mars crossed her arms and opened a rather graphic site with clothe less males doing nasty things to each other. Jupiter screamed in horror and tried to run away in her five-inch wedges. She promptly tripped and fell, only to be caught by Saturn.

    His eyes went wide in shock at the computer screen before he slung Jupiter over his shoulder and sprinted away from Mars.

    The remaining commander smirked and went back to reading dirty fanfiction for another few hours.

    Then she finally decided to go over Saturn’s math.

    And THEN she discovered he did everything completely wrong and had scribbled hearts all over the paper and made little love notes about Jupiter everywhere. The poor guy was obviously hopelessly distracted by the conniving virgin who had finally captured his eye.

    Mars shook her head at the monstrosity that was the funding. She had to completely redo everything on different pieces of paper so Cyrus wouldn’t yell at Saturn for wasting lead writing about how hot Jupiter was.

    Then Mars decided to go find herself a girl to spend the next hour or two with before Jupiter and Saturn returned for the usual meeting about stuff.

    So she took her T-Bird and sped along the back roads till she arrived at a favorite stomping ground: Eterna City.

    There she parked at the Galactic building and walked over to the gym, which was closed. She took out a key and opened the back door, searching about for Gardenia.

    The young gym leader had just settled down for a bath when she heard Mars calling out her name. Eagerly anticipating the dirty elder finding her in a tub with bubbles she yelled for Mars to hurry up to the bathroom.

    Soon the redhead appeared in the doorway and was beckoned in by the youngster. Mars began removing her clothes as she approached the deep tub and jumped in.

    “Hi Mars! It’s great to see you again… I’ve been rather LONELY without you…” Gardenia winked, grabbing the rear of the Galactic commander, who began groping the girl.

    “I know honey, but I’m back now, and we’re going to make the best use of it,” Mars smirked, kissing Gardenia and pressing her against the tub walls.

    The two engaged in their usual naughty, wet sex, only this time with bubbles a plenty flying everywhere. Needless to say, Mars was very late for the meeting, and Gardenia’s bath water was a bit unclean by the end.


    “Maaaaars… what the crap took you so long?!” Jupiter whined as the redhead finally walked in.

    “Doing Gardenia in as many ways as possible,” Mars bluntly replied as the other two commanders flinched and Cyrus glared at Mars, muttering something about hating love and relationships and physical closeness.

    “Well, uh, what are we talking about today?” Saturn started off the discussion.

    “I need something done. And I need it done soon! Saturn, because he is smart, and one of you two needs to go to some island in Kanto and get a Deoxys. I do not care how useless it is just as long as one of us has one, because it is spacey, like us. So pick a girl and leave. NOW,” Cyrus dictated, essentially ending the discussion in about two seconds.

    “I think that my dear Miss Jupiter would be happy to accompany me, no?” Saturn looked over at her and she giggled back at him.

    “Sure! I’d love to go get a Deoxys with you,” she smiled as Mars frowned at her use of ‘with you.’

    “Good. Go away. Mars, go get dinner, I am hungry. I want Brussels sprouts, get them. AND BE SURE YOU PUT THE CINNAMON ON THIS TIME,” Cyrus loudly ordered, stomping off to his black office to await Mars delivering his meal.

    She plodded out angrily, kicking at the air at always been ordered around by Cyrus to get his food.

    “What, am I wearing a freakin’ French maid outfit or something?! Sheesh, he never tells Jupiter to go cook his stupid vegetables. And he never tells Saturn to grind up meat for him so he can chew it! Idiot!” she ranted, meandering her way to the kitchen.

    “That’s because your outfit looks more like a French maid’s than Jupiter’s tight stripper getup,” Saturn commented from behind her as Jupiter snorted.

    “And what are you wearing? Gay track star costume?” she sneered back.

    “At least I don’t have a huge gap on my leg that gives easy access to guys!” he cackled in return as she glared.

    “Well, that doesn’t matter because there aren’t any decent-enough guys to make use of it, so HAH!” she retorted, smiling.

    “What about Saturn? Doesn’t he get any?” Mars giggled as Saturn nodded his head in agreement.

    “Yeah stupid, what about me?” he fluttered his eyelashes at her while she frowned.

    “I’m too good for imbeciles,” she slowly stated as Mars laughed and Saturn glared at her.

    “How can you be too good for yourself?” he grinned as he replied.

    Jupiter pouted and tried to come up with a good comeback. But she couldn’t.

    Mars just nodded her head. Everything was as it should be. The angry, emotionally-unstable commanders were insulting each other again, and she was being treated like a slave. This is the life!

    Once the other two commanders departed to go find a Deoxys Mars got the chefs to make Cyrus his odd choice of food.

    She then took it up to the emo old man and practically threw it at him so she didn’t have to go near him.

    Then, per usual, Mars went in search of a female grunt to, ahem, spend the evening with.

    And finally Mars went to sleep… that’s a typical day in the life of Mars.

    Except for the fact that she went and slept with Cyrus too. And Saturn and Jupiter got lower salaries to give Mars more money. Even though she already made more money than them. Dang her and her voyeurism!

    And it ends Mars 2, Saturn 3, Jupiter 2.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Almost everywhere


    This is my first time even reading a Shipping story, and I must say that I quite like the bluntless of it all. I'm going to keep an eye on this story - usually I don't even give romance-esque stories a first glance, but there doesn't seem to be very many fictions about Team Galactic yet, and though it doesn't seem to be going anywhere it's strangely intriging. Oh, yes, and I have to give you props for this line:

    That had me laughing for a while. I think it's the question mark that did it. Anyway, you could work on not having the conversation dialogue be so...only-that. It's as if, while they're talking, absolutely nothing goes on anywhere, and I would like more description - so far there's a heck of a lot of talking.

    Another thing...Saturn being a Peeping Tom was extremely eerie, because that is EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED in a backup role-play sample I wrote for Evolution (the link is in my signature, and if you want I can message you the role-play sample)...well, except instead of Jupiter it was a random female grunt, and instead of being in her closet Saturn was simply looking through the doorway as she undressed.

    I didn't quite get the whole random Lugia/Venus/Cipher deal, but it might have been just me...anyway, I am looking forward to updates and have subscribed to this thread.
    Last edited by Aaron_fan; 2nd September 2007 at 12:01 AM. Reason: Added a few thoughts.
    Team Galactic fanatic. Sinfulshipping supporter. Ginga 411 member.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Review! Review! *turns to coconut with carved face and cheers!* Now maybe Nutty and I can get off this island... Ahem.

    Haha, thanks for reading then! I thought I liked to beat around the bush a lot with this one but hey, it's rather blunt too. I concur there are few Galactic fics anywhere, makes me sad. They're all I write now. =P Hehe, guess it is going nowhere fast. Chapter... 5 is even worse at going nowhere. ^^ It is a rather slow, drawn-out fic. It goes places eventually, though! The last chappie is rather conclusive and speedy, I'll hint.

    ^^ Thanks, I adore the song title mentioned in the quote and it's one of my favorites in the story. *takes humble bow* I see what ya mean, though, there's not too much action goin' down. Description has never been my strongest point, thus I shall attempt to add more as I go back and review the chapters. I think it gets better as it progresses, though... but I could be mistaken.

    Oh Saturn... you know the poor guy's gotta sneak a peak SOMETIME on someone. ;P I guess his character is widely portrayed as a naughty little boy. ^^ Great minds think alike, eh? I shall click the link soon and investigate... and feel free to PM me the sample!

    Lugia is a made-up character, but she's got backstory-a-plenty, and was convenient for the Chappie Rewrite, since the original made me sad. Venus is there for the planetness in her name, and to cause trouble. Cipher is... a growing interest [also neglected in writing] and a convenient ploy. Doesn't make much sense to me either, to be honest, tis just there... to prevent blood and gore and graphic rating. =P And yay, subscription! *turns to coconut and does happy dance* Thanks again for reading, and here be chapter... four.

    The end got reworked, it was too smutty, I didn't like it... not too sure I like this one overall much, let me know if I should rework it madly like I did Chappie Two, I don't deny I think it could use it, considering Chappie Two got majorly scrapped and this one was written before that. I got lazy and didn't change it too much. Then I redid the end, cause Nutty said it was rubbish. Enough rambling, I present another useless chapter that goes nowhere... and I know the very end is lameness... *apology in advance, is late*

    Chapter Four - What Happened On the Boat

    Probably wondering what Saturn and Jupiter did on his boat, huh?

    Well, last chapter was all about Mars. Not them. Thus this chapter will flash-back to that. Yayz!

    In any case… Saturn was driving Jupiter to a secluded lake in the Sinnoh Mountains to go sailing in his fancy ole yacht.

    And Saturn never drives due to the fact that he never passed Driver’s Ed even after 69 tries. Jupiter never bothered. The teachers all felt so sorry for Saturn’s sucky skills they passed him anyways, but advised him to drive slowly and rarely. Because he was rubbish at it.

    Thus Saturn was slowly driving to a lake to go sailing. He could steer a boat! Gotta give him SOMETHING he can do, after all.

    And they had the radio on, blasting it, grooving to the 80’s.

    Jupiter was drinking some health smoothie to stay thin, and Saturn was trying to not crash. Eventually he successfully arrived at the remote lake and they ran to the boat. Er, Jupiter tried to run, tripped in her heels and Saturn carried her to the boat.

    They set sail on his fancy white yacht and stared out into the cool, clear lake and at the surrounding green mountains.

    “It’s really nice out here. Should I plug my iPod in now?” Jupiter asked, pulling the shiny pink thing out of… um… her dress.

    Saturn watched with interest as she took it out. “Sure… as long as I can put it back,” he winked and she giggled, walking over to the covered speaker system and turning it on. The upbeat dance music play list began playing and the duo sat down, letting her iPod run its course.

    “Saaaturn, whatever happened to all those old pictures of us?” Jupiter asked at last, looking warily over at him. She knew those photos were still a sore spot with him.

    “I put them on the boat. This is where I come to be alone and think, so I hung all of them on the walls in the bedroom to remind me of… us,” he coldly answered, obviously still upset over something.

    “Can… can we go look at them? It’s been such a long time since I’ve seen them,” she cautiously asked, glancing at him to make sure she wasn’t pulling a wrong chord.

    “I thought you never wanted to see them again in your life,” he bitterly laughed, narrowing his eyes at her apparently never-expected change of heart.

    “That was a long time ago I said that. I changed my mind,” she harshly stated, walking off to look.

    “Whatever,” he spat out, unlocking the door to the yacht’s bedroom and quickly speeding into the room.

    Jupiter looked at him sadly, knowing he was still angry at her for the biggest embarrassment of his life.

    She gazed at the photographs on the wall of their junior-high and high-school days together. Her eyes focused in on all the King and Queen shots. They had won king and queen for every single dance and event every single year except one.

    Senior Prom. They had lost to the new Mexican immigrant couple nobody knew. Jupiter had blamed Saturn, broke up with him, slapped him and stormed out, vowing to never speak to him again.

    Little did she know he had planned to propose to her in front of everyone and everybody in the whole school knew except her.

    Saturn was heartbroken; he actually had loved Jupiter and was devastated she left him. The entire rest of the year he was mocked for being totally rejected in his never made ‘proposal.’

    In the beginning she had loved him back, but over time winning every time drove her to using him as her trophy man, to literally get trophies and pictures plastered up in lighted school cases. She forgot why they were dating in the first place, and in all reality she caused them to lose the most important dance.

    The senior president was a kind girl who was elected for her honesty and integrity, surprisingly enough, and she saw that although Jupiter and Saturn had been together for years, the former didn’t love the latter. Poor Saturn was crazy about her, but Jupiter had become manipulative and abusive towards him, using him to gain her prizes.

    The couple that beat them were frightened from being chased out of Mexico and clung to each other. All the voters agreed they were a better, more devoted couple than Saturn and Jupiter, who previously stood unrivaled.

    And of course, once the winners were revealed, Saturn accepted defeat and politely decided to wait until they had taken their pictures to propose. Jupiter immediately began screaming at him for causing her to lose. He didn’t cause them to lose, he caused HER to lose. The president pointed out to her that was the reason they had lost, but Jupiter wouldn’t listen to the fact she had become selfish, greedy and obsessed with winning and instead claimed she’d never want to see Saturn or any pictures of him ever again.

    Then she stormed away in a rage at having lost, leaving a lonely, abandoned Saturn alone, sobbing.

    He became bitter and cold. She switched out of all their classes and they never saw each other again, except graduation. Jupiter was sitting next to a new man and Saturn saw her. The still-depressed ex fumed and started crying again in his upset state, even going as far as to trip her new boyfriend when he was walking up and then beat him when this girlfriend-stealer threw a punch at him.

    But Saturn was empty and worn down from moping over his lost love. It was a hollow battle and a weak victory.

    Jupiter broke up with him soon after school ended, Saturn guessed, for a few months after they had graduated she arrived alone at Team Galactic and remained alone, or so he thought.

    He had already applied for a position and was most displeased when he saw her ever-so-familiar name right next to his for the rank of commander. The sole other commander, Mars, was very confused on the immediate animosity between the two.

    She begged Cyrus to demote one of the two since they could never get along, but he refused, being the emotionless, cold man he was and told her to make them work together.

    Reluctantly the pair cooperated and eventually got to the point of sharing iPods, but that was the extent of their friendliness. Neither had told Mars about senior prom’s ruining their relationship.

    Jupiter began to quietly cry thinking of what she had destroyed. He had loved her and she used him to get her fancy picture on some stupid wall and lost sight of why they were together in the first place.

    Reflecting back on what the honest president had stated, Jupiter finally admitted to herself it WAS her fault they lost, not his. If she’d acted more like a girlfriend instead of a slave-driver they’d probably have won and been married by now.

    Glancing at the final picture of them as king and queen, she sighed and turned to face Saturn at last.

    He glared at her coldly and turned his head to look out the window, away from her.

    “Saturn… I’m sorry. I… I shouldn’t have blamed you when it was all my fault we lost,” she started after an uncomfortable silence, looking down at the ground.

    “No you shouldn’t have. You completely ruined everything. I was going to ask you to marry me whether we won or not and everyone knew it! Then you go and break up with me and leave me there crying and I’m the laughing-stalk of the whole school. And THEN you replace me in about two days with a new little pawn and go on with your life perfectly fine as if you’d never met me. You may have forgotten all about me so quickly because you never loved me but I’m STILL not over you. I never recovered from being abandoned like that and I’ve never loved again, and I never will,” he bitterly snarled, staring her down as he slowly got off the bed and moved closer to her.

    “I did love you! I really did! I was just so angry I lost…” she declared, trying to set the record straight.

    “That’s your problem right there, sweetie, YOU lost. It’s not ‘we’ lost but ‘I’ lost. I was nothing more than your little show dog and it’s all my fault you lost that Best in Show title, isn’t it? You may have liked me at the start, but once we started winning it became all about you and any feelings for me were abandoned for the little highs of that camera’s flash. I still love you, even now, but I’m not sure you could ever truthfully love me like I do you, so much as I’d like to marry you it would probably never work, we’d always be miserable,” he sarcastically, coldly, sadly responded, starting to walk out of the room.

    She ran up and tried to grab his arm, but he hit her away, knocking her to the ground as she began crying loudly.

    “I think I’ll quit Team Galactic and go to a different team so I don’t have to see you every stinking day anymore. You bring back too many bad memories I tried to bury. Maybe you should go find your boyfriend, because you aren’t going to get a proposal out of me,” he emotionlessly stated, giving her one last bitter look before closing the door and leaving her to sob her eyes out.

    Saturn wanted more than anything for her to run out and plead with him to stay. He would’ve said yes in an instant if only she’d just come out and do something, anything. Hit him, threaten to jump overboard, scream at him, go down on her knees, hold him at knifepoint, anything to make him stay.

    He’d have run into her arms and told her he was sorry and it’s alright she blamed him and left him there alone, he didn’t really mind, just as long as she said she loved him even if she didn’t mean it, and told her he loved her, and kissed her, and held her and soothed her and touched her after such a long time apart.

    But she didn’t come. She never emerged and she never called out to him.

    All he could hear was her crying and it drove him mad, waiting for her to beg him to stay with her. His mind kept telling itself just another minute and she’ll come until two hours had passed by and her sobs had subsided.

    Eventually he couldn’t stay away himself any longer and he ran back to the door, looking in at her limp form propped up against a wall. She appeared to have cried herself to sleep, so he opened the door.

    Gently he lifted her wet body up and placed her on the bed, climbing in next to her to await her waking up.

    About an hour later she finally opened her eyes slowly and batted them at him. “This is such a nice dream… tell me you love me, sweetie,” she softly sighed out, thinking she was still asleep.

    “I love you Jupi,” he acquiesced.

    “Yeah right, liar. What are you doing here, shouldn’t you be long gone off with Venus?” she scowled, pushing him off the bed.

    “This is my boat, scum! I oughta toss you overboard and see how you like it, ungrateful… ungrateful… um… thankless… thankless… thingy!” was his outraged reply, shrieked while he was laughing.

    “What in the WORLD is so funny?!” Jupiter whipped her head over the bed to glare at him.

    “It’s… it’s… Team Cipher! Venus is totally on the boat trying to take it over and looking at me like ‘what are you doing’ hahahahaha look at her!” Saturn cackled madly, pointing at the brunette staring back.

    “Are you SERIOUS? I’m having drama and SHE decides to burst in on MY scene. Oh, I’ll show that hussy a thing or two!”

    The magenta-haired commander got up, stormed out of the room, up to Venus and punched her square in the jaw, knocking the slighter female over the side of the boat.

    Saturn, meanwhile, sat inside and laughed hysterically.

    Venus was spluttering out water and trying to call the grunts bumming about to action, but they thought she meant to join her and they all jumped ship.

    “Man overboard, eh, Venus?” Jupiter smirked, sticking her tongue out and pulling her eyelid down at the rival villainess.

    “I’mma gonna kill ya! I’ll ruin your ENTIRE image once I get back to my radio show! Humph, you’ll have no defense against my superior looks and social skills, so, HAH!” Venus flipped her off, proudly lifting her head up in triumph.

    “Yeah, except me, stupid. You ain’t got no man to back you, ho, so ho, ho, hoof it outta here before I run you over with my yacht and then sue you for trespassing… and win,” Saturn popped up next to his fellow Galactic commander and stuck HIS tongue out at the drenched Cipher admin.

    “You both suck,” she pouted before swimming off with her semi-useful troops.

    “What a great team we make, huh?” he commented, watching her fading, glowering form.

    “Yep. Soooo, were you serious about leaving?”

    “And get stuck with a ninny like her? Heck no, I’m staying right here!”

    “We’ll see what Cyrus has to say about that when you’re late for the meeting today… which is in about twenty minutes, actually…”

    “Let’s get a move on! Time for unsafe speeds down unsafe roads with an unsafe driver, yay!”

    They high-fived and headed off for the awaiting high-ranking team member meeting looming in the very near future.

    Mars 2, Saturn 4, Jupiter 3, Venus -1, Cyrus… whatever he had last time.

    I thanketh thee in advance for reading and reviewing (don't disappoint the coconut!)... and depart by scuttling off to work on the Galactic Comedy that tis coming along nicely and needs to get posted. *smacks self for laziness and scuttles*

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Almost everywhere


    I agree, the ending was rather lame, but I liked how you explained the whole thing. Venus's "you both suck" and the grunts misunderstanding/leaping into the water made me smile. Again, more description of the characters and pretty much everything else would help. I also think you have too many spaces between lines - there really isn't any paragraphs. Anyway, I still liked this chapter. I know this review is quite a bit shorter than my last one, but I can never tell when Serebiiforums is going to go down.
    Team Galactic fanatic. Sinfulshipping supporter. Ginga 411 member.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Another review! Nutty and I have constructed a boat to escape the Isle of Reviewless Fics! FREEDO-*gets shot*

    Eventually I'll redo the ending, it was most definitely fail. I totally forgot about, like, Cyrus' entire dilemma-ending chapter and didn't write one, thus, when I return to add that I shall see about changing scum end of poor chappie. Venus is so great for plots, and lines. Now, Galactic grunts are the stupidest grunts of all, while Cipher grunts are actually semi-intelligent, but still rather slow. Quick to leap like lemmings, though. ;p Description, description... I totally had thought about it for previous chapter, then got lazy and didn't add any detail. But for further chapter editting description shall be added! I think I did a fair job of descriptions in Chappie Six to begin with... mebbe. Paragraph-lacked noted and fixed [hopefully!] in Chappies Five and Six, which are up editted and up. I can see your point of many, many random lines, and thus removed excess spacing. Don't worry about the length, I know how unstable the forums can be. PS Read the PM, quality amusement there... but I'm lazy replying to PMs and shall get around eventually... hopefully. =P Thanks for reviewing, and for your reading pleasure, Chapters Five AND Six... cause six is distressingly short... to make up for the freakin' eighteen page Cyrus chapter up next. >.> *shakes fist at Betelgeuseshipping for being over 1/3 story* DEATH TO I-*is shot again*

    Chapter Five - Saving Private Oxy

    Saturn and Jupiter eagerly awaited the grunts returning with his yacht so they could sail to Birth Island, as Team Rocket had dubbed it, and get a Deoxys.

    Once the grunts had successfully driven the fancy white boat and the commanders to the ocean, the pair happily set out onto the open sea together, alone. “Oh Saturn, I’m so glad we get to be out in the water all alone with nobody else for so long. We can watch the sunrise and the sunset and it’ll be SO romantic!” Jupiter sighed, resting her head on an arm as she stared out across the horizon.

    “Mhm… just like the good old days,” his eyes glazed over with a nostalgic expression as he gazed at her. “Yep, just like the good old days… well, not exactly. I’ll be nicer and less controlling and more loving and we won’t be in school winning any king and queen awards,” she added on, frowning slightly at this thought. “Actually… the annual Villain’s Ball is coming up in two weeks. And if you remember, the Ball King and Queen award hasn’t been won for the past four years. We could try for it this year, it’s not like we don’t have experience being the cutest couple present…” Saturn warily suggested, eying her reactions cautiously.

    “Really!? You mean it, we can enter together? We can win another one?” she excitedly cheered, running over and hugging him. “Yeah, I think it’s time for the return of King Saturn and Queen Jupiter. Just as long as you promise to have FUN and not get too competitive or obsessed with winning like last time,” he sternly stated, backing up a step to make sure she knew he was serious.

    “Uh-huh, I learned my lesson; I’ll try not to repeat that nasty old prom. And if you think I’m starting up again tell me, okay honey?” she readily agreed, waiting for him to smile before she kissed him.

    “Thank you Saturn,” she lovingly cooed as he led her to the bow. “Hey, don’t think it’s all for you. I want us to win again too. We’ve been waiting a while to get back together, this’ll be a great upset,” he grinned, sitting down on the front of the ship with her next to him, giggling.


    It had been almost a week since Jupiter and Saturn hit the open ocean to go catch Deoxys, and a certain female commander was getting rather annoyed.

    “Are we there yeeeeeet?” she groaned, rolling her eyes as she scanned the horizon for land and spotted none. “No! Stop asking me, I’ll freakin’ tell you when we get there. Gosh, you are the most needy, impatient person I’ve ever met…” he muttered, glaring angrily at her as he tried to steer the boat through some choppy water.

    She snarled at that comment and turned her back to him. “If I’m so needy and impatient then why do you love me?” she cockily smirked, knowing she had him there. “Because you’re hot, stupid,” he sarcastically retorted, letting out a bitter little snort. Her eyes went wide and she tensed at that statement. “You PIG! I want off this boat right now, I don’t want to be stuck anywhere with a greedy pervert like you!” she fiercely demanded, wheeling around to stare him down.

    “Fine, get off!” he shouted back, spinning the steering wheel and causing her to fly over the railing into the water due to an immense wave hitting the boat. “SAAAAATUUUUUUUUUURN, HELP!” she wailed, frantically splashing around in the rough surf. Realizing what he had just done he sprinted down the stairs, grabbed a life preserver and flung it to her.

    He could see her hand reach for it but miss as she was dragged under.

    And she didn’t come back up.

    Saturn began panicking, he couldn’t see her, she wasn’t grabbing the floating ring, and she was beneath the surface in the rough ocean during the beginning of a windstorm.

    He called her name, looking all over for any sign of the poor woman, but he got no response.

    So he decided to do the only thing he could: jump in after her. After all, he was the better swimmer, the one who loved water, she couldn’t swim as well as he could and it worried him if she’d be able to resurface on her own in time. In all reality she couldn’t swim that well at all.

    Cutting through the water like never before, he swam to where he’d last seen her and scanned the water around him for her familiar shape.

    Something brushed against his leg before touching it again and latching onto his long limb. Slowly, so as not to shake her off, he pulled it up until he could grab her hand and drag her the rest of the way up. She came up spluttering out water, obviously almost out of air, ghostly pale with blue features and shaking furiously. Jupiter was either on the brink of drowning, hypothermia or shock and needed to get out of the water.

    The terrified expression on her face was painful for Saturn to look at, she was deathly afraid and seemed to have been mentally rattled. She wrapped her arms around him so tightly it hurt Saturn and he tried to swim back to the boat, drifting ever-farther away, as fast as he could.

    Reaching the life preserver he pulled them along back to his yacht and hauled Jupiter and himself onto the wet deck before examining her current state carefully. She was crying, shivering, and eerily white, her lips were blue and she was barely moving. The water had been unusually cold, he noted, looking at his own arms trembling viciously.

    He quickly carried her into the bedroom, placed her on the floor, closed the door and ran around securing the ship to drift about during the oncoming storm. Having strapped everything in he ran back to the bedroom, locked the door and went to the closet to grab towels and blankets.

    Luckily she had been making hot chocolate before coming out to whine about how long it was taking, so he poured it into their mugs and brought them over to the nightstand next to the bed.

    Then he returned to Jupiter, who was still shaking violently with a scared expression. He quickly took all her clothes off and toweled her dry before doing the same to himself. Picking her up gently he placed her in the bed and spread all the blankets from the closet over her before climbing in himself and pulling the sheets over his white form.

    He snuggled up against her, clutching her cold body to his slightly warmer one and hugged her tightly to try and warm her up. She eventually stopped trembling so much and settled into a heavy sleep, snuggled up against him, while he drank his hot chocolate before falling into a light, dreamless rest as well.


    Saturn woke up to Jupiter shifting against his body before slowly opening her eyes.

    She gave him a frightened expression and pulled away, looking at him with tearful eyes.

    “Don’t worry Jupiter, it’s sunny now, you’re safe. I’m sorry I got so irritated with you and rocked the boat to tip you off, you were just bored and I shouldn’t have yelled at you,” he drew her back in, stroking her hair gently.

    “You jumped in after me, didn’t you? You risked your own life for me, even though I demanded to get off the boat…” she rather distantly stated, staring out the window with a dazed look. “Yep, I’d risk my life for yours any day of the week,” Saturn smiled at her as she kissed him. “Thank you Saturn, I’d do the same for you…” she drifted off, giving him an eerily adoring gaze before kissing him.

    “They do say that the friction heats you up quite nicely,” he warily suggested, eying her profile.

    “Are you hitting on me, dearest virgin of mine?” Jupiter winked, pulling the covers into a bundle over herself.

    “I could be,” he smirked, scooting closer.

    “Oh? You know it won’t work…” she smiled, teasing him.

    “I wouldn’t underestimate my ability to coerce you into having fun, fun, fun,” he playfully replied, poking her side.

    “YOU TWO ARE DOING NOTHING OF THE SORT!” the angry voice of Mars screamed from over the videophone as Cyrus stood behind her, glaring. “Oh, don’t think we didn’t have the grunts install cameras in your room you dirty little freaks! You’re on a mission to catch a Deoxys, not try and shag each! Idiots, get back to work!” Mars dictated as Cyrus nodded his head in agreement.

    “Well Mars, I think I currently am working,” Saturn smiled at her as she snarled. “That is NOT the kind of work I am talking about! Find Deoxys and bring it back, THEN you two can do whatever the crap you want with each other on the way back. Headquarters OUT,” she grunted, pounding the button to shut off the phone.

    “Those two are so USELESS! Ugh!” huffed Mars, storming around Cyrus’ office.

    “Perhaps you need a bit of a break yourself… take the day off, I shall handle your tasks while you enjoy yourself,” Cyrus bluntly stated, shooing her out as she smiled at him and kissed his cheek.

    “Thank you Cyrus! I’ll be back later for your ‘special treatment’ okay dear?” she winked as he shook his head in agreement. Under her breath she muttered, “But it won’t be myself I’ll be enjoying, heh.”

    Naturally Cyrus heard and shrugged. “Whatever… now, what in the name of Arceus did I assign her to do today?”

    Meanwhile, Mars was driving in her beloved red T-Bird to go find one of her more recent little obsessions.

    “My dear little Dawn told me she’d be visiting Hearthome City about this time… hm, should I see if she’s there? Why of course I should…” she mused to herself, speeding along to the rather near[ish] town to find her next shag.

    She found the ten-year-old out practicing in a field with her Pokemon alone.

    Mars stopped the car and hopped out. “Hi Dawny-poo!” she called out, waving to the innocent little girl.

    “Mars, hi! It’s so great to see you, how have you been?” Dawn excitedly yelled, recalling her Pokemon and running over to the older woman.

    “Oh, pretty good. Cyrus gave me the whole day off because Saturn and Jupiter were being such bozos. He told me to enjoy my time off, so I was wondering if you were particularly occupied in this rather secluded field on this rather little-used back-road?” she grinned, moving closer to Dawn.

    “Wow, that’s awesome! No, I was just training, but if you want to do something with me, I can take a break for a while,” she naïvely replied, not fully realizing just how seductive and manipulative Mars could be.

    “I’d simply love to do something with you… I’ve really missed you since the last time I saw you sweetie,” Mars cooed, leaning in and wrapping her arms around the small figure of the blue-eyed girl.

    “I’ve… missed you too,” Dawn muttered as she kissed Mars, knowing she shouldn’t and she ought to be training with her Pokemon instead of making out with a member of Team Galactic… they were the enemy! But Mars had told her nobody was really evil, they were just members of the resident, necessitated criminal organization because every region needed one, otherwise what was Officer Jenny doing besides slacking the crap off?

    So Dawn allowed herself to be pulled into Mars’ backseat with tinted windows and she let Mars lock the door and climb on top of her.

    “Oh Mars…” Dawn moaned as the much older woman began tossing their clothing off.

    “What’s wrong, Dawn dear? Don’t you want to?” Mars soothingly stroked her face.

    “Of… of course! It’s just… been a while. Try not to stay away for so long next time, okay?” Dawn winked as Mars assured her she wouldn’t.

    Suddenly Mars’ cell phone rang. She screamed against Dawn’s chest and reached out to grab it. The cheery voice of Jupiter greeted her.

    “Hey Mars, just thought I’d remind you that she’s TEN, and what you’re doing is called pedophilia and you’re liable to get arrested for it since they were still in poodle skirts last time you were a minor!” Jupiter’s voice was oozing with poison. She was obviously still upset Mars had burst in on her and Saturn earlier.

    “I am not THAT old! Sheesh! Besides, you only get arrested if you get caught… holy crap the coppers! AHHHH!” Mars hung up and scurried into the front seat to drive off and hope the mass of fuzz-mobiles wouldn’t spot her. Dawn followed her and clung to Mars as the latter sped along the back roads till she’d lost the police.

    “Should we carry on?” Mars asked, parking the car and looking over at her underage companion.

    “Of course…” Dawn gave a mischievous grin and leaned over to kiss Mars.

    Mars 4, Saturn 4, Jupiter 5… I think.

    Chapter Six - Can We Save Private Oxy NOW?!

    Sorry for not getting to Private Oxy… it was supposed to happen instead of Mars and Cyrus calling BUUUUUT their stupid ship has like, attacked this story… yo.

    Private Oxy shall be saved this chapter… phear not! HARHARHAR.

    “So Saturn, should we do something constructive now and go find that Deoxys we were supposed to have caught and been back with by now?” Jupiter asked, sitting… somewhere on the boat.

    “Yeah sure I guess. Let’s go find it. Holy crap what the crap is that thing?! CRAAAP!” Saturn yelled as this hovering light descended onto the boat.

    It disappeared to reveal a lanky Deoxys in Defense Form. It saluted them and fell to the ground, collapsed. Its crystal had been a bright yellow-orange, but now it was rather pale as the Deoxys slipped unconscious.

    “Well shoot, we found one. Quick, catch it so we can get back. Then we can heal it on the way home. Heck if that wasn’t just about the easiest mission we’ve ever had,” Jupiter commented as Saturn threw a Master Ball at the Deoxys and caught it.

    “Okay, let’s set sail off this stupid Birth Island place. Screw that gay name, Mars is so far beyond just gay it’s not even funny. Sleeping with the boss, sleeping with ten-year-old-girls, sleeping with gym leaders, sleeping with just about any girl, sleeping with multiple girls at once, she’s so gay she’s straight,” Saturn pulled the anchor up and sped his yacht far off into the ocean back to Sinnoh. “That’s why she’s sleeping with Cyrus now!” Jupiter cheered as Saturn nodded that it was probably true.

    “Let’s see how badly hurt this guy is. Maybe he just made a long journey through space and is tired,” Saturn remarked as he released the Deoxys. It sat down on the side of the boat and looked at them.

    “Got any vodka or anything? I am WASTED after that ride across the solar system dudes, I need something to help me out before I go find some drugs or something dudes,” he, for it was a male voice, telepathically communicated to the commanders. “What?! You don’t chug booze if you’re a Pokemon, you chug Potions you numbskull!” Saturn retorted, slapping the Deoxys, who looked at him with a gone expression.

    “Oh duuuuude, I’m a Pokemon? Dudes I AM! Cool dudes! Say, can you like, repair this gaping hole in my arm? Navigating the asteroid belt can punch a hole in ya sometimes ya know dudes. And could ya put a LITTLE vodka or something in whatever you give me? Please?” Deoxys asked, looking around with a puzzled expression as to where these young, hip people kept their booze.

    “We don’t have any booze, sorry buddy. And um, sure, we can like, spray something on that wound I guess. Hope it works. Do you have a name?” Jupiter asked, spraying Potions on Deoxys and watching his wounds go away. “Yeah kids. My name is Oxy, and I’m a Private in, um, some military organization I think. Maybe I’m a detective… yeah I think that’s what I am dudes. Private Oxy is my title… what do they call you two?” Private Oxy responded, scratching his head. “I’m Jupiter, and this is Saturn. If you want to get technical, you could call us Commander Jupiter and Commander Saturn, but heck if we care,” she replied, shrugging as Saturn came back down from the navigation deck.

    “Well, we’re on autopilot for home, so, um, what should we do now?” he reported, shuffling along. “Dunno. We could return Private Oxy and do what we usually do now, AKA nothing important,” Jupiter suggested as Oxy shrugged in agreement and was recalled into his ball.

    Mars 4, Saturn 5, Jupiter 6

    I thanketh thee for reading, and partition thee to revieweth mine story. And, may I add, Chap. 7 is most descriptive, in my opinion, and uniquely structed compared to others. Tis coming after a review or day, whatever strikes this here fic first.

    PS Random trivia but almost all Saturn/Jupiter scenes were written to Electric Barbarella... by Duran Duran. And the italics when Oxy speaks are because he speaks telepathically.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2007


    I just read through all of these and it's just so WIN I came about 5 times. You are the best~

    I love how Mars is like the ultra gay player, and Jupiter and Saturn have it goin' on. xD;


    Until I get a better template, this is my trainer card 8D
    Pairings I support: Firechick,Pallet, Imageshipping,Infrared, Girlpower, Graceful, Sinfulshipping..

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Fix'd. ;O
    Another review! Nutty and I have reached LAND! LAAAND! *is shoved back into sea to drift away*
    In any case, I thank ye greatly for ye kindly statements. ^^
    Dang straight Mars is the pwnsomest gay playa 'roun this parta town. Yey! Jupi and Satie most definitely do... for they have the similar bangs and eye styles... and that 'bangs' tie-in is too great to resist. *coughs at bad pun-thing*
    Hehe, I certainly spend enough time on TEH INTRAWEBZ... *coughs up blood from bullet wounds*

    I present you with... EIGHTEEN FREAKIN' PAGES OF A SHIP I DESPISE! Gosh dangit I hate this chapter sooooo much. Yet I'd say it's the best. It needed like, no editting, and as promised is presented after another review. *Nutty cheers* Here is even more nowhereness to read. I rather dislike some parts of it for Cyrus OOCness, they may need to be fixed if y'all concur, but I got lazy and wanted to return to mah comedy one-shots. And this should tide y'all ovah till I add in the resolution to this one... since I forgot it... >.>

    Heah be TEH MONSTAH!
    Chapter Seven - Finally a Chapter about Cyrus!

    4:30 A.M.: I awaken at my usual hour to my usual alarm with its efficient, monotone buzz. The sleep setting is ignored, forcing me to begin my day without wasting it like others. There is something abnormal about this morning, however. I find myself staring at a rather large lump beneath my bed sheets that is slowly writhing and stretching. It seems disgruntled at the alarm. A limb, pale white, thin, rather feminine in general manner, reaches out and searches for the clock to turn it off, but is fruitless in its search. The alarm is on my side of the bed. This odd figure disturbing my usually scheduled life appears to have a rather womanly profile to it and is, approximately, the length and width of Commander Mars.
    It IS Commander Mars.
    I recognize her high whine of irritation. She is annoyed she cannot shut the alarm off and is being forced to wake up. What is Commander Mars doing naked in my bed? My memory is not failing me and has reminded me I agreed to raise her salary and dock Commanders Saturn and Jupiter’s if she performed acts of pleasure with me. That is an extremely inappropriate course of action for her to suggest and me to allow. I should not be sleeping with a subordinate and giving her unearned benefits for her low actions.
    Then again, for the record I must report she is earning those benefits. And rather well, I must add.

    4:40 A.M.: Rather than be dressed already and be on my way for my first daily nutritional intake I remain in bed speaking with Commander Mars, who is attempting to break me of my habit of calling her ‘Commander.’ She cites that since we have slept together twice now we are rather familiar with each other and should not continue to use our titles. I find this to be an emotionally-driven desire for attachment and closeness, all of which are signs of weakness. She can not possibly expect to receive affection from me; I do not have such feelings for her or anyone else. It rather saddens her I refuse to call her just ‘Mars,’ and some odd, never-used part of me is… distressed by her displeasure. Although I must proceed to mentally examine myself later, I have, for now, agreed to her request. Com… Mars is rather persistent.

    4:50 A.M.: I have to increase my usual leisurely strolling pace in order to retain my usually scheduled day due to… Mars causing lateness in my typical routine. Although this particular commander generally rises before the other two, she still dislikes the hour of 4:30 A.M. sharp to awaken at and has gone back to sleep. In my chambers. She acts like she owns the place or has moved in. She also insists on convincing me to wake up at a later hour so we can rise together. I find this to be another emotional attempt to grow closer to me to compensate for her lack of a permanent, substantial relationship. No matter what she attempts, I shall continue with my life as I have ever since I took control of Team Galactic. Although ten minutes may have to be reserved to allow for personal communications with Mars…

    5:00 A.M.: Having consumed minimal nutrients at a pace quicker than usual I am now caught up with my planned day and am sitting in my office sorting personnel complaints. This is as all should be… excluding the odd distress over causing Mars sorrow. I shall skip my lunch in order to examine myself carefully for signs of fatigue or illness to determine why I am feeling.

    5:10 A.M.: I am examining the scientists’ new idea of using compost as a fuel source. It is rather intellectually stimulating and highly interesting. This report contains 312 pages and I anticipate I shall have to put off reading Saturn’s logs on the cages for Mesprit, Uxie and Azelf in order to finish it in one sitting. Considering he is not here I doubt he will mind.

    5:20 A.M.: It is time for my usual morning stretches to prepare me for another long day in the office. I must solve a Rubix Cube in less than a minute, no problem for a man of my intellectual capacity, draw a geometric design in the ‘Zen Garden’ sand I received as a Christmas present from Mars, perform precisely eleven and a half jumping jacks for maximum limbering, and go through a minute’s worth of arm and leg stretches. Commander Jupiter often states I should visit the gym with her and the other commanders to get exercise in. Perhaps I shall when she returns with Saturn.

    5:30 A.M.: This report is most fascinating. It would most likely be easier to read if it was not coated in some sort of reddish slime that appears to be in the makeup of blood.

    5:40 A.M.: Mars has woken up and come strolling into my office, expecting a friendly greeting. I ignored her unwarranted presence and continued to digest the information contained in the charts on compost decay times and how they affect the efficiency of the fuel. The commander became irritated when I did not acknowledge her appearance and attempted to remove the document from my hands. Thus I grabbed her arms and twisted them backwards to ward her off. She proceeded to give me a hurt, angry expression before storming out. I am investigating scientific breakthroughs, I do not have time to be kind to her or to even be remotely concerned if she is injured or upset with me. Luckily that odd flare of emotion earlier is an isolated incident.

    5:50 A.M.: I completed the scientists’ analysis and contacted the scientist in charge in Saturn’s absence to permit him to continue researching this compost fuel. Now I am beginning on Saturn’s progress with the underground chamber and the device to form the Red Chain. He is not as efficient as I would be but for an emotional man preoccupied with fantasies of Commander Jupiter satisfying his sexual needs he makes good time.

    6:00 A.M.: I continue to examine the status of the cages and find it to be acceptable. Upon his return I shall assign Commander Jupiter to aid Saturn… in the construction.

    6:10 A.M.: Having completed all the documents I must read for the day I find myself rather task less. The grunts are performing their usual monthly maintenance on all the vehicles this week and thus I have nobody to assign anything to. They have no updates of missions. The scientists are studying rotting vegetation, the chefs are most likely preparing the morning meal, and the secretary is curling her hair I would assume. Commanders Saturn and Jupiter are the only members currently away and I expect them to be reporting in today at some point, however it is quite evident they will be sleeping in later than usual to make up for exerting so much energy right before passing out in the sole bed on Saturn’s yacht. That leaves me rather unoccupied and unaware of what Mars might be doing at this hour. Perhaps I shall track her down and ask if she would like to do anything with me considering this unexpected and most unwelcome opening in my day.

    6:20 A.M: I am having a great deal of difficulty finding Mars. She is not in my room, she is not in her room, she is not in the workout room exercising, she is not in the mess hall awaiting a meal, she is not aiding the grunts clean the submarines, she is not helping the scientists, I would state she has been abducted by aliens if I knew that was not plausible. She is here somewhere unless she left unauthorized. I shall find her.

    6:30 A.M.: After completing a search of the building and finding no trace of Mars I have returned to my office in a rather perturbed state at her fleeing due to my indifference towards her earlier. This is most undesired.

    6:40 A.M.: I made an announcement requesting the missing commander to report to my office immediately and for anyone who sees her to please escort her here.

    6:50 A.M.: She has not arrived yet however she should have if she was here. It is most distressing she has vanished. My office of blackness is getting rather stuffy; perhaps I shall open a window. Commander Mars’ office, when she uses it, is next to mine, and Commander Saturn’s is next to hers with Commander Jupiter’s next to his. There is something sticking out of Commander Mars’ window. I must investigate this. It appears to be her head. Part of her body is lying on the window sill - has she been attacked or just passed out? She is not moving and appears to be unconscious. I must go investigate this.

    7:00 A.M.: After procuring the gun I keep in my desk I have set out to investigate Commander Mars’ body and am arriving at her office. As I enter there appears to be nobody else there and no signs of a struggle - perhaps she is just asleep. As the door slams behind me she jolts awake and screams slightly before swinging her head around. The sweet traces of sleep disappear when she eyes me and her expression turns sour. She wants to know what I am doing in her office pointing a gun at her. I explain I was concerned when I saw her form on the ledge and decided to investigate if we had an intruder. She scowls and asks if concern is an emotion, implying I am lying about my desire to know her status.

    7:10 A.M.: I have been able to deduce Commander Mars is still upset over my not greeting her and twisting her arms. She is rather bitter about it and I am trying to reason with her that her bitterness makes her weak. Out of anger she says I am weak because I do not feel and have rid myself of all emotions, and that emotions make one stronger instead of weaker. Is it possible she is correct?

    [Cut to regular action rather than time-by-time of Cyrus’ day]

    “Please explain as to how my decision to remove emotions and feelings from my life makes me weaker than if I had chosen to retain them,” I state, eying her oddly, wondering what she is talking about. If someone you love is injured, you turn stupid, love in and of itself makes you do stupid, reckless things you would not do if you did not experience it, in anger or rage or fury you become foolish and take risks and do think things through, sadness is a most depressing feeling, why would someone want to experience these things?

    “Because your emotions make you stronger! By overcoming your guilt and anger and depression you gain more inner strength, and by beating your fear you gain courage. And there’s nothing like falling in love, even though it may be hard and painful the goodness of love outweighs the badness. Don’t you want to get married and settle down with a girl and have children? Come on Cyrus, haven’t you ever looked at a sunset and wished you could enjoy it, or gone to the beach and walked in the cool water at night and found yourself wishing you could take pleasure in it? Do you want to die alone, a miserable old man who’s never allowed himself to have fun or take joy in the little things?” she cries out in response, grasping for me.

    “When I recreate the universe I had always assumed I would take a mate to bear my descendents, yes. And no, wishing or pining away for something is too emotional, I have never desired to take pleasure in anything I do,” I bluntly reply, telling it to her like it is and dodging her attempts to grab me.

    “Not even me? And what about your dream of becoming a god? Isn’t that a wish, a desire you have?” she is smirking at me, knowing she’s got me in a bit of a bind.

    “You are a rather… pleasurable experience, I admit. I suppose there are some things I would be most appreciative for receiving, such as ruling the universe,” I must confess. She is pretty good at targeting me after all these years.

    “Do you desire me?” she sweetly, innocently asks, batting her heavily-mascara-coated eyelashes at me. She knows after holding off any sort of physical relationship for so long I am… rather eager for a female.

    “Considering you are the female I have been in direct contact with for the longest and the only one I have slept with, it would be an accurate statement to make that, yes, I would desire to have you carry my children once I take over,” I am avoiding her true meaning and she knows it. We both know I’m covering what she really wants to know.

    “That’s all fine and well, but what about here and now? Don’t you want me to satisfy you? My door locks, nobody will even be on this floor, they’ll never know…” she simpers, finally cornering me and stroking my face lovingly but roughly.

    “I believe I agreed to sleep with you at night for a raise in your salary. You must wait for then,” I was making excuses and she was getting angry. It was also getting harder for me to fight the loud voice in my head screaming, “DO HER!”

    Pursing her lips she moved in closer and I could almost feel the heat radiating from her body. I knew if she pressed her hot figure against me she would have me. “Cyrus, that’s not good enough for me. I want MORE. You wouldn’t deny yourself the chance, would you? No extra charge… Please Cyrus, just give yourself over to your emotions this once to try it. Let yourself feel and see if you like it. I won’t let you down Cyrus, give it a chaaance,” she cooed, stopping so close to me it felt like we were touching even though we were not.

    Reluctantly, I gave in to her. “Alright Mars, you win,” I stated with much despair. She smiled at the emotion in my voice and urged me to let more show.

    So I kissed her and ran her up against her desk, hurting her back most likely, and allowed the barriers against feeling I had set up in my mind to take a rest.

    It was like electricity was surging through my veins as she wrestled with my tongue and wrapped her legs around my waist, pulling me down on top of her on the desk. She was right, this was quite enjoyable, and I wanted to feel more.

    She seemed to know this somehow and took off my shirt, running her hands up and down my chest and pulling at the hairs. Then Mars gave me a rather frightened expression as she gagged and tried to push me off her. I realized I was strangling her with my tongue and not allowing her to breathe.

    But I could not stop. I liked seeing her writhe beneath me, struggling against me, fighting back. So I kissed harder, bruising her sweet lips as she choked. In a last-ditch effort she finally succeeded in flinging me off and she gasped for air, eying me warily.

    The realization came to me I had nearly suffocated her and a wave of guilt washed over me. I told her these emotions were bad and made me weak. “Mars, I am sorry, I told you I should not feel, are you-” I began, but she cut me off with her mouth.

    “It’s alright Cyrus, I liked it. All my life I’ve been the girl on top, dominating and leading, only time I’ve been the submissive one is when I’ve been raped. I’m tired of it. I want a man to dominate me and use me, to shove me underneath him and order me around and beat me if I don’t obey. You can do it… treat me like a dog sweetie, I’m yours for whatever you want,” she moaned out as I examined her. She was half delirious already with her desire for sex and I wondered how sound her judgment was.

    She kissed me again and pulled me on top of her on the desk. I laughed at how bad it would look if we were caught. The head of an organization choking his subordinate on her desk in her office as she squealed in pleasure at being the toy of a man.

    So she asked me if I liked it and I practically roared yes. She was getting pretty into it as well and was grinding against me as I ripped her clothes off.

    I discovered why Mars always goes around sleeping with people. She is completely crazy for action and she will get it one way or another. Commander Mars is also VERY good at shagging.


    12:40 P.M.: I am regaining consciousness after the last round with Mars. She is still smiling in her sleep next to me on the floor. Sometime during the four hours + we did it we had rolled off her desk.
    Even though it completely disrupted my usually scheduled day that was the best dang four hours of my life.
    Commander Mars agrees, as she screamed out many times during our various escapades.
    I remember doing her every way and every where possible during those four hours as she grew increasingly more aggressive and fought back. Her room now smells like nothing but sex and sweat and both of us are lying in puddles of Arceus knows what. The image of her face, eyes shut and mouth open yelling screams of ecstasy, remains in my memory, and I feel… pride… at having brought her such pleasure. But my emotions cannot remain, they must be walled up again, I cannot be made weak.

    12:50 P.M.: Mars has yet to wake up and I am eager to proceed on with my day. If I leave she will most likely turn violent at the fact that I abandoned her. She is most emotional.

    1:00 P.M.: The commander and I have arrived at the mess hall for my regularly scheduled nutritional intake period. Various members are eying us warily. This leads me to the logical conclusion we were rather loud and distinguishable. Although I intended to digest a small salad like I usually do, Mars firmly suggested I try the soup of the day, like her. She also insisted on sitting with me, when normally I plan to eat alone and she dines with the other commanders or eats out. What she eats in the case of the latter is a popular topic of drunken gossip, namely instigated by one of the other commanders. This is most distressing; she is attempting to communicate with me in the dreaded method of ‘small talk.’ Why will she not leave me alone?

    1:10 P.M.: Although I will have to perform more research on the subject, I believe I can make a reasonable hypothesis or two regarding Commander Mars.
    1. Commander Mars has become romantically interested in me and desires to deepen our relationship, namely emotionally.
    2. Commander Mars has romantically-inclined feelings toward me and assumes I have the same for her, which I do not, because I do not feel.
    This scenario reminds me of a movie, it probably was a B-plot in some celebrity’s flop movie. I do not want my life to be like a B-plot. This is most unacceptable.

    1:20 P.M.: I have discovered that in order to budget time for ingesting soup and other non-greens I shall have to alter my schedule, it is taking a disturbingly long time to finish this meal, possibly because Mars is constantly talking to me and expecting a response to everything she says. This is most annoying.

    1:30 P.M.: In order to get the lovesick commander away from me I have given her the rest of the day off and told her to, essentially, get out. She requested I accompany her however I declined, perhaps too quickly for her liking, and suggested she go visit one of her lady friends. Huffing off, she stated she would go find Dawn, who appreciates her company. Once the other commanders return I must ask them on how to best analyze Mars’ behavior and then act on it.

    1:40 P.M.: The pattern in my Zen Garden is not geometric, like it always has been in the past. Absentmindedly, I picked up the rake and began drawing… it wound up in the shape of a heart. This is most emotional and illogical. At 2:00 P.M. I shall begin a self-analysis.

    1:50 P.M.: Commanders Jupiter and Saturn decided to report in with word they have successfully captured a Deoxys. They tell me it is rather off mentally and demands alcohol whenever it is released, much like Mars demands sex and attention whenever she is around me, and calls himself Private Oxy, but he cannot remember if he is in a civil defenses organization or a detective agency. It is most typical of them to capture a Pokemon ‘off its rocker’ as Saturn kindly stated.

    2:00 P.M.: It is now time for my self-diagnostic. As far as I can determine the only emotions I have recently felt are pleasure, since Commander Mars so kindly demanded I drop my barriers against feelings, and confusion at my current state of being. This is excellent news; however I still must decide what to do about Mars’ feelings toward me.

    2:10 P.M.: Despite her having been gone for only 40 minutes I find myself missing the presence of Commander Mars. I have never had much companionship in my life and this taste of what I have so readily been skipping has made me rather… eager for more. I appear to be anticipating her return. I believe I need a psychologist to check me over.

    2:20 P.M.: After scheduling an appointment with the only medical personnel on any evil team, members of Team Rocket, I have decided playing Solitaire would be a good use of my time.

    2:30 P.M.: Having begun thirty games, I have lost them all. This is a most cruel game.

    2:40 P.M.: I do believe I am playing Spite and Malice, not Solitaire. I have not won a single game of this wretched activity.

    2:50 P.M.: There is only one conclusion as to why I would subject myself to this torture: Mars’ like for abuse is rubbing off on me.

    3:00 P.M.: When she returns I shall inflict severe wounds on her for introducing me to this highly irritating variation of the traditional game and making me enjoy the constant losses.

    3:10 P.M.: This is completely ridiculous. Mars wins all the time, however I have not managed to get nearly half-way complete in any one scenario. I have come to the conclusion SHE CHEATS.


    3:30 P.M.: Now that I have successfully completed a round of the game, I am back to wondering when Mars shall return to me. I believe she would enjoy it if I took her out for dinner and a movie. Studying up on the subject of the female gender’s preferred dating locations may prove beneficial.

    3:40 P.M.: The female race is a distressingly intricate web of insatiable, whining, complaining, angering members whose sole purpose is to deceive, manipulate and harm males. This is my only deduction, having researched proper dating protocol. It is most illogical.

    3:50 P.M.: Now I must decide what suitable attire would be. Nothing too casual or too suave, I can determine. Although Mars has always been my closest commander, I find I have never taken as much time as I should have to socialize with her. She will most likely think this invitation is highly romantically-motivated when it is not. I must make certain she does not get the wrong impression of my motives and that the only reason is I can say to a certain level of certainty she would be happy to be taken on a proper date for once in her life.

    4:00 P.M.: Having fully prepared myself for the occasion, I now await her return even more. If she does not arrive soon I will be forced to call her to ensure she is on her way back soon.

    4:10 P.M.: It is possible she really did take the whole day off and will not return until tomorrow. Commander Mars is notable for such vengeful ploys and ideas. I would not put it past her to spite me in this fashion.

    4:20 P.M.: I do believe she is not returning. It is apparent I dressed up and wrote my query of her for no reason now. I shall change into my uniform and draw in my Zen Garden until it is my regular meal time and eat alone, per usual. That is how I like it.

    4:30 P.M.: My missing commander decided to show back up just in time, I had almost entered my room when she called out my name eagerly…

    [Regular-style again]

    “Cyrus! Wait! What are you doing all dressed up?” Mars yelled as she ran up to me from the stairs and stopped outside my door, panting slightly.

    “My original intention was to request the accompaniment of a female to a fancy dining service and a ‘drive-in theater’ afterwards, however she was more than a little late,” I cryptically replied as she cocked her head and tried to figure out who I was taking about.

    “Oh… is she here now? Or did she not show?” the rather down commander asked, thinking I was speaking of a different woman than her.

    “She did indeed arrive at long last. If you would not mind, change into something nicer than what you have on and report to the automobile storage garage immediately,” completely blowing my original plan, I improvised asking her while still maintaining a degree of mystery.

    Shrugging with a rather depressed edge, she nodded her submission and walked back to her room to go change. I headed down to get in my car and wait for her. She slowly trudged in eventually wearing a black dress with sequins and hanging her head down.

    “Please enter… the front seat, Commander,” I corrected her as she attempted to open the back door of the vehicle. She seemed rather surprised when there was nobody riding shotgun already.

    “So… where’s your date?” she warily asked as I drove along the road to a fancy Italian restaurant.

    “You shall see when we arrive,” was my mysterious response.

    She was quiet, which disappointed me. This was not like her, and I had been anticipating conversation.

    “Did everything go alright with Dawn?” I queried at last, determined to find out what was bothering her.

    “Yeah, yeah, she was great, we had fun. It’s just… um… Cyrus, if you’re going out with another girl then why are you taking me along?” she blurted out quickly, turning away from me.

    “We have arrived,” I stated, adjusting the mirror as I parked the car. “Look in the mirror to see the woman who is accompanying me,” I added as she sighed.

    Naturally the only reflection she saw was her own. “Um, Cyrus, all I see is myself…” she trailed off, the optimist in her cheering that she was my date while the pessimist muttering she needed to get her eyes checked.

    “As you should,” I plainly stated as she turned to me and blinked.

    “You mean you’re taking me out on a date!? Really?!” she excitedly shouted as I nodded.

    “I would not call it a date, per say. We are most definitely not dating, however I felt that you would enjoy being out on typical dating activities for the first time,” I reported as she pursed her lips in trying to understand it.

    “Well, even if you don’t want to say you took me out on a date, thank you for bringing me… does this mean we’re splitting the bill?” she first kissed me on the cheek before pulling away and sighing, wishing she had brought her purse or money.

    “You are welcome. And no, we are not sharing the cost. I am paying for everything. Although this is not an official date I find it rude to not pay for you, the fact that you forgot your currency notwithstanding, since you could always pay me back,” I retorted as her eyes widened with realization.

    I exited the car and went around to her side to open her door and help her out.

    “This sure seems like a date to me… are you positive you won’t call it that?” she shivered slightly in the cool air of Veilstone.

    I huffed and relented to her demands, “Very well, if you insist on dubbing this excursion as a date, we shall.”

    She smiled at me as I led her into the restaurant.

    I informed the waiter of my reservation for two and he seated us in a remote, quiet corner of the building, lit only by candlelight.

    “Oh, I would have the steak, but it’s awfully expensive, I don’t want you to spend too much money on me…” she sighed, scanning the menu.

    “You may have whatever you wish, appetizer-wise, drink-wise, main course-wise and dessert-wise. I personally shall be getting a soup that you may split with me if you desire and the goat-cheese, turkey sausage with apple and Alfredo-coated chicken pizza. What variety of soup would you prefer?” I replied, looking at the options.

    “I’ve always loved clam chowder… this place is famous for fresh-water clam chowder! Do you mind if I have an Appletini?” she answered, checking out the mixed drink list.

    “That is acceptable. What would you like for your main meal?” I asked, noting the waiter returning.

    “Actually, um, if you wouldn’t mind too much, that pizza sounds really good… could we, um, split it, maybe?” she timidly wondered as I nodded in acceptance of this proposal.

    “Have you two decided on anything yet?” he asked and I replied that we had.

    “Clam chowder for two, an Appletini for her, a Cosmopolitan for me, and a large Tuscany Delight Pizza,” I stated as he wrote it down and told us the drinks would be out in a few minutes, the soup a little after that and the pizza a bit later, they were rather busy.

    “Cosmopolitan, hm? I never did picture you as the whiskey, rum and beer type, good to know I wasn’t wrong,” she smirked over at me mischievously. It was a logical assumption she intended to be rather naughty on this date.

    This became fact when she ran her toe up my inner leg and attempted to toy with her favorite part of my anatomy. I glared at her and she huffed, removing her foot. She was making her dislike of being shut down rather obvious so I decided to allow her to continue.

    Copying her actions, I brought my own foot up her leg and rubbed her with it. It was evident she enjoyed it greatly, so I increased the speed of my toe’s stroking. Then I saw the waiter coming back with our drinks and stopped while she pouted.

    “Here you are,” he said as he set them down and we thanked him. She gave me a dirty look over her glass and I knew the combination of her already-kinky mind and high levels of alcohol would be a handful.

    I reached out under the table and grabbed her knee. She slid forward on her seat so I could reach higher up her body. I slouched as well as one of her hands snaked its way around my figure. The commander would never pay attention to the movie at this rate. It is fortunate my car’s windows are extremely tinted.

    The waiter once again returned with the soup this time, and after he departed I suggested to Mars we refrain from touching one another too much until the movie. She agreed and picked up her spoon to start in on the clam chowder.

    For as slow as she was eating it she was not conversing with me much. In fact, she had not said a word since concurring it would be wise to minimize contact.

    “Commander, are you feeling acceptable?” I clumsily asked, unsure as to how to best query on a female’s personal well-being.

    “Yeah, I’m alright, why?” she replied, looking at me quizzically.

    “I have noticed a decisive alteration in your mealtime behaviors. At lunch you could not silence yourself and expected a response out of me whenever you made a statement, however currently you have barely spoken and when you do you do not seem to anticipate receiving a reply. Is there any particular reason for this change?” I elaborated, much more content to be delivering observations and facts than inquiring on how anyone is feeling.

    She snorted and seemed to glare at me. “Well, aren’t you Mr. Insatiable? You looked really annoyed and uncomfortable when I decided to try and be sociable with you at lunch, so rather than continue to mess up your usual eating protocols I thought this time I’d just be quiet for you, but I guess that doesn’t fly for you either. What do you want, some perfect balance of silence and chatting? Sorry I can’t analyze how long I should speak for before being silent like I’m sure you could,” she sarcastically retorted, folding her arms and taking a large swig of her drink.

    I do believe she is attempting to get drunk. While I have taken two swallows she is almost done and is looking for the waiter to ask for a refill. I read that when the date is not going well oftentimes the distressed party will intake large levels of alcoholic beverages in order to loosen tensions and remove their frets.

    Apparently this date is not as perfect as I had planned.

    “I am not of the opinion that is a very appreciative response when I showed concern for your mental and physical health, however I could be incorrect. For this event I would prefer you engage me in conversation like the others are doing, the silence is rather awkward when everyone else is talking,” I whispered, having glanced around at other couples sitting within view.

    “You’re right, it’s not. I just didn’t think someone emotionless would really be interested in whether I was alright or not. If you wanna talk fine, we’ll talk. What’s the real reason you brought me on this date? To show everybody the leader of Team Galactic could get a girl? To prove you get just as much action as anyone else? Sorry to disappoint you, but I don’t intend to be used by you or any other man for their status. I won’t be going along for the ride on your little ego trip, hope that doesn’t cause any emotional flare-ups for ya,” she scowled, standing up. “I’m out of here,” throwing her napkin down on the table, she left.

    “Commander Mars, halt! You are sorely mistaken in your notion as to my motives for taking you on a date. I had no plot created to boost my ego or status, or to use you in any manner. The reason, as I stated previously, for bringing you was to provide you with the opportunity to go on a date and experience a fine, traditional romantic evening, which I am not aware you have ever had. And… and after you left I wished you had not,” I admitted, grabbing her arm to hold her in place so she would hear me out.

    Her angry expression faded as a look of curiosity spread over her face. “You… you missed me? You regretted sending me away, even though I was annoying you? Really?” she softly asked, looking into my eyes.

    “Without the emotional aspects, yes, those are correct assumptions for you to make. Considering my day was rather devoid of tasks it would have been an acceptable change of plans for you to have remained. Perchance on other days when neither of us has-” she cut me off with her lips, kissing me gently.

    Mars and I returned to the table and finished off the clam chowder, conversing along the way.

    “So Cyrus, where did you grow up?”

    “Sunyshore City.”

    “Did ya know Volkner, the leader of the gym there now?”


    “Oh really? Was he your friend?”

    “He was.”

    “What happened?”

    “I was attracted to him and he got drunk. We had sex, he woke up embarrassed about what he had done and told everyone it was rape. They believed him.”

    “Ohhh… So wait, you’re gay?!”

    “I was for him, yes.”

    “But I’m not a guy, oh gosh, are you bi?!”

    “No, I am no longer attracted to any males, especially not him.”

    “Okie. You didn’t have the nicest past… Well, how did you become the leader of Team Galactic?”

    “My mother was assassinated and I took over.”

    “Oh that’s horrible! If my mother had been assassinated she would’ve left my stupid half-brother in charge, even though I’m older. So, did your mom have the same ‘recreate the universe’ goal as you?”


    “Um… mind telling me more?”

    “Team Galactic has been an organization ruled by my ancestors for generations. The name, purpose, ambition, goals and members change whenever it is passed down to a new leader. My mother wanted to colonize the moons of the solar system and called the group Team Luna. They had constructed a shuttle with suitable provisions for living successfully on the moon however the governments of the world did not approve of a private organization landing on the surface of the satellite and shot her to prevent this.”

    “That’s horrible! Oh, it must’ve been hard for you… I hope they don’t shoot you.”

    “Your concern for my wellbeing is unwarranted. Most people of power consider Team Galactic to be a laughing-stalk, namely due to the grunts’ inability to speak English, Jupiter’s odd phrases she yells out in defeat, Saturn’s fondness for blowing things up, and your voyeurism. This all adds up to people thinking little of me and the team as a whole when we are a large threat.

    “Team Rocket views us as a valuable ally. Maybe because we share a mutual dislike for Teams Aqua and Magma and Team Cipher hates all of us. And they’ve got pretty crazy members too.

    “Team Rocket is run by children. Your half-brother is only in charge of the solo agents, he merely pretends to order the partnered agents around, everyone knows they execute plans and follow orders created by fourteen-year-olds.”

    “True, true. Mommy made a stupid choice leaving Giovanni in charge. If she’d let ME take over Team Rocket would’ve taken over the world by now! But no, I’m a girl, so once she made her final decision I left.”

    “It is most beneficial for me you did.”

    “Aw, thanks. So, what’s your favorite color?”

    “Preferring one hue of the spectrum over another is illogical and serves no purpose.”

    “Does too! Don’t you think you look good in one color more so than another? And when you buy furniture or carpet or paint doesn’t the color affect your choice?”

    “My outward appearance will not be relevant once I recreate the universe in my own image. I select the make that best suits the need I have and accept whatever color it comes in when purchasing the items you listed.”

    “Well, do you think I look good in black, since that’s what color your office and room are?”

    “How does my opinion of your clothing matter to anything?”

    “Ooooh, I knew it! You hate small talk and all I’m doing is annoying you. That’s why I wasn’t talking to you; all it does is make you irritated! Saturn’s great at chatting with people, but you’re nothing like him, whenever I ask you a question you use a one-word answer instead of explaining like he does, and you’re so blunt and pessimistic. And for your information, girls like to be told they look good in what they’re wearing, even if they don’t sometimes.”

    “Commander, I am out of practice with mundane intercourse. I assure you it is ‘not you, but me’ I believe the saying is. Commander Saturn excels at meaningless conversation because of all the females flocking around him: he is used to the attention and flirting. I do not understand the feminine desire for compliments about everything they do and put on however the dress you are wearing contrasts with your pale skin and red hair nicely.”

    “Well if the last time you had sex was with that stupid gym leader who’s dating Candice now I’ll say you’re out of practice! Saturn doesn’t need to be good at it, Jupiter’s too hot for him to care if he can make the weather sound interesting… whoo look outside the sun is setting, isn’t it pretty? You’re pretty… and I’m pretty too! Isn’t my dress pretty? It sparkles in the pretty sunset… my fork’s pretty too, don’tcha think Cyrus baby?”

    Commander Mars has drunk, by my count, ten Appletinis and one of my Cosmopolitans. I have had three Cosmopolitans. We just got our dessert of chocolate cheesecake and she is already begging for another drink. This time she wants a Bloody Mary.

    “Mars, you are drunk, you do not need any more alcoholic beverages. Eat your dessert; we still have to see a movie. And while your dress is quite form-fitting and flattering, I do not find your fork to be attractive in any way.”

    The waiter returns with two Bloody Maries and a Shirley Temple.

    “One’s for me, the other two are for you!” she squeals, trying to lap her drink up with her tongue.

    “This is embarrassing and unbecoming of someone of your status. I will not ingest those two drinks.”

    “Okie, I’ll drink it like you… but only if you drink yours! Pwease sweetie, drink ‘em, for me?” her words are slurred and she is looking very tipsy. I agree to drink the Bloody Mary and the Shirley Temple if she drinks like a normal person.

    “Finish your dessert so I can pay and we can leave.”

    “Dun rush me sugar. I know ya wanna get alooone with me but be patient lover-boy.”

    Our alcohol intake stands at ten Appletinis, one Cosmopolitan, one Bloody Mary and one shot of vodka with orange for Mars and three Cosmopolitans, one Bloody Mary, two Shirley Temples and a Pina Colada for me by the end of the evening.

    The drink bill itself is over a hundred dollars for the two of us. The commander is completely wasted and will most likely have a rather nasty hangover tomorrow. The effects of alcohol on me are not as severe, but I can tell my mind is impaired from my seven drinks. Nothing compared to Marsi’s thirteen, of course.

    We pay and are on our way out, stumbling along.

    “Soooooooo, what movie are we gonna go see? I luv movies, almooost as much as I luuuuv you!” she coos, latching onto me as I try to drive the car to the theater.

    “Connecticut Dreams,” I manage to spit out.

    We finally arrive and I park. Looking at other vehicles it is evident everyone else is in the backseat just like we will be in about two seconds.

    Just as soon as Mars figures out how to undo her seatbelt.

    “Cywus honey, ya didn’t tell me ya luv me, don’tcha?” she whines, desperate once again for a definitive relationship.

    “Commander, as you well know I do not feel, and love is an emotion. Thus, no, I do not love you,” I somehow got out relatively unslurred.

    Mars began bawling.

    “WHHHHHHYYYYYYYY?! Why don’tcha luv me? What’s wrong wit me? Why duz nobody luv me? Everybody I’ve ever loved never loves me back, I’ll never be happy!” she sobbed violently as I, rather drunk, pondered how to best comfort her.

    “There is nothing *hic* wrong with you, Marsi-poo, ya just do not get involved with da right peoples,” my mind was succumbing to the effects of alcohol rather quickly now and I could tell soon I would be lying to her about how much I adore her to get her into the backseat with me.

    “You sayin’ I’mma perfect? THEN WHY DON’TCHU LOVE ME?!” was the roaring response I received. Mars was getting angry with me now and attempting to force the issue.

    “Did Ah say that? I dun remember what Ah said… Ah told ya why Ah dun love ya, Ah ain’ got nooo emoootions,” I started mooing for some odd reason. It was also rather unfortunate I could not recollect events only a few seconds ago.

    “I *hic* am pewfect *hic* and I don’t *hic* care what the *hic* you can remember or *hiiiiic* not, I also *hic* don’t care what the *hic* you gotta say about *hic* your emotions, you *hic* got ‘em. Sooooooo, *hic* TELL ME YA LOVE ME, or *hic* no luvin’ fer ya *hic*,” she looked ready to pass out and was having difficultly speaking.

    “Your Perfection would ratha Ah lie ‘bout mah feelins’ than tell ya da truuuuth?” I personally find it extremely rude to lie to a female, and I will not lie to Mars, no matter how much I want her.

    “Whhhhhyyyyyyyy ya gotta say ya gotta liiie bout ya feelins’? Duntcha luv me, Ithoughtudid,” Mars was incredibly wasted and decided to drag me into the back whether I wanted to go or not.

    “Ya thought wrong stoopid. I ain’ got no feelins’ ta lie bout,” though I was trapped beneath her hot, shapely body I refused to give in to her fantasy-land where I possess emotions and am in love with her.

    “Weeeeeeeell, if ya did hev feelin’s *hic*, wud ya luv *hic* me *hichic*?” a dreamy looked passed over her face and her eyes looked a million miles away.

    “It… is… possible…” I had to confess that there was a chance I could love my redheaded commander if I did not banish myself of emotions and still had them.

    “Have you been having dreams about me, you know, romantically-inspired fantasies?” she suddenly asked in a completely normal tone without a trace of the multitude of alcohol she had ingested.

    “Yes,” was the only answer I could give.

    “Gud enuff fer *hic* me,” she grinned drunkenly above me, her breath reeking of alcohol and her eyes glazed over.

    “So you gonna gimme some or not?” I bluntly demanded, flipping us over so I was on top.

    “Yea I’ll put out fer you cuz I’m sucha sluuut,” she rolled her eyes and pouted at me.

    “You ain’ a **** baby-doll, ya jus’ like akshun,” my drunken attempts to soothe her seemed to work.

    “Aw thanx honey, I luv ya too,” Mars smiled sweetly at me and at that alcohol-induced moment I felt an emotion I had not felt in years welling up before demanding to be let out.

    “MARS I LOVE YOU!” I shouted as her eyes widened and she looked at me in shock. I also felt shock at this unexpected announcement. Her gentle, trusting look when she smiled up at me and the booze in my system caused an extremely emotional outburst.

    The question was, did I really love her? Did the alcohol force a hidden confession out of me or make one up?

    “Cyrus in love? THAT’S a new one. We go away for a little while and Mars gets you wrapped around her dirty little finger in no time at all,” one of the two voices I would least want to hear after screaming out anything emotional just decided to kindly pop in.

    “Hello Saturn, it is *hic* unexpected to see the *hic* of you here right *hic* now,” I replied, hoping he and Jupiter would let up fairly quickly.

    “So that’s your boss, doing a subordinate in a car at a drive-in theater? What the heck is up with that?” a Deoxys floating behind the two commanders telepathically stated. It had a cigarette in its mouth and a bottle of rum in a tentacle and I could only assume this was Private Oxy.

    “We wouldn’t know. I wasn’t aware he took the time to engage in romantic excursions. Guess the temptation of Miss Experienced Marzipan got him,” Jupiter smirked as she and Saturn laughed at us.

    “Oh, bug off whydontcha? We dun need ya roun’ here ruinin’ da night,” Mars muttered, glaring at her fellow commanders angrily.

    “I see. Well, we’ll let you two continue on with your lovey-dovey fun and go back to headquarters. Have a nice DATE,” Saturn cackled as he, Jupiter and Private Oxy walked off snickering.

    “You are jealous cuz Mars is soooooo much bettah than Jupiter!” I yelled after them. The two commanders froze in place.

    “Like you’d know how good I was! I’m too hot for you, you ugly old man, only Mars sleeps with way older men!” Jupiter screamed back before latching onto Saturn and dragging him off.

    “Issa true all da guys I slept wit *hic* hev been lotta older dan me,” Mars admitted, almost embarrassed.

    “That is alright, Marsi dear, *hic* Ah do not mind the age difference *hic* at all,” I attempted to counsel her, since it was evident she was distressed by her taste in older males.

    “Makes me look like a *hic* gold-digger,” she moaned, concerned people would consider her money-hungry.

    “Ah is only ten years older *hic* than ya, it ain’ dat *hic* bad,” I assured her. She appeared to settle down after this was pointed out to her and looked up at me with an expectant expression.

    “Da movie’s gunna be ovah if we dun *hic* get it on *hic* soon,” she reported, trying to rub herself against me but too drunk to maneuver very well.

    “An accurate assessment,” replied I.

    So I took off our clothes in a public location and had hot sex with my top commander in the backseat of my car.

    Did I ever mention she is extremely good?

    Mhm, you did, boi. Note the lack of running tally... I lost count of all the pwns played out... but I think it returns next chapter. In any case, thanks for reading, and please do add to the review count so Nutty and I can navigate our way across the mainland to Alaska to go dig gold with Marsi.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Almost everywhere


    I have a question. Why did you write 18 pages on a pairing that you hated? I really don't see the logic in that, but there were quite a few quotes I liked, mainly these:

    This report is most fascinating. It would most likely be easier to read if it was not coated in some sort of reddish slime that appears to be in the makeup of blood.
    This one just made me laugh. Again, the bluntness was great.

    This is most distressing; she is attempting to communicate with me in the dreaded method of ‘small talk.’ Why will she not leave me alone?
    Bah, I know that feeling.

    I can't play solitaire. At all...not that I've tried a whole lot, either.

    Anyway, I find pretty much all pairings with Cyrus completely insane and for the most part stupid due to his set-in-stone quirk as seeing all emotions to be illusions and useless sentimentality. But...I don't know if things such as lust or curiosity are classfied as emotions. For some reason I liked the timeline of events and the actual long will this story be, by the way? Oh, and I'm glad you liked the role-play sample I messaged you - I figured that would make you happy.

    The Cyrus chapter seemed to drag on, but it was rather fun in parts, if that makes any sense. Most of the drunk stuff just got old after the first few minutes.
    Team Galactic fanatic. Sinfulshipping supporter. Ginga 411 member.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Why? Why? I shall allow Nutty to tell the tale: Yeti used to simply hate BG [the ship in question, Nutty is lazy], it was despised more only by 1 *cough*advance*cough*. She only liked GodComplex for Cyrus, since you KNOW it's canon. But then, as Saturn got all the action in stories, she felt sorry for neglecting Cyrus, he was always so left out and alone! And, well, once he's ruler of the new universe, isn't it assumed he'll find someone to bear his descendents? Then Yeti went and read Tabby's fic, and decided that perhaps Mars, who had previously been the gay player bested by none, would need to settle down eventually too... And then, against her will, the ship began to grow on her, like a tumor, sucking the life out of the poor Yeti. She hates to love it, but she does. It shouldn't be, yet it... it is. *Yeti twitches on floor*
    That one is one of my favorite lines from the chapter. ^^
    Smaaaall taaaalk... eeeewww...
    I've tried, oooh, I've tried, but it's a nasty ole game unless you get haxxorz house rules. ._.;
    To be honest I hated all Cyrus pairings [except GodComplex] too. But I felt sorry for neglecting him, thus, well, I tossed the experienced ho called Mars his way, to be nice. It's rather difficult to tell if he simply doesn't HAVE emotions, or if he buries them, and they're still there, thus I assume the latter, but I do try and write him as emotionless as possible. I had hoped the timeline-style would be good for Cyrus. And the story is 47 pages in Word... but I need to add another chapter to resolve this one... which probably should come next, after Chappie Eight. C7 ended at page 42, for the record. These last two are short... until the new C9 comes in and makes it 10 chaps. *is rambling* Hehe, it did need, t'was quite amusing. ^^
    Oooh, I knew it'd be too long. Making everything ten minutes apart = loooong time, I got lazy in the end, if you couldn't tell. Dang, drunk stuff never does last very long, huh? >.> Ah well, it never reappears in this fic or others, no worries.

    I present the next chapter! A move-it-along-chapter-before-the-resolution. =o

    I hate that stupid ship. It needs to DIE. DIE!!!!! So, back to the ship I like… since, y’know, there was that Villain’s Ball shin-dig coming up… ho ho ho!

    Which is probably in about two days, considering it was in two weeks from before they went looking for Deoxys and going down to get it was a week…

    So here we go with it.

    “OMG Saturn, we have to go shopping for clothes for the Villain’s Ball!” Jupiter exclaimed, sitting on Saturn’s bed in his room as he flipped through the channels on TV next to her.

    He turned away momentarily before speaking, “Well actually, I was thinking that maybe we could wear our outfits from the Senior Prom…” “To redeem them? You don’t think they’re unlucky?” she cocked her head and thought about the idea.

    “Yeah, since they’re the only clothes that have lost. And no, I don’t think they’re unlucky, it just wasn’t our night. But in two days it will be ours again,” Saturn dreamily commented, staring off into space.

    “True, true. Alright, we can do that! Do you still have them?”

    “They’re in the closet in the bags, staying safe and clean and collecting dust.”

    “Time to shake those moths off then!”

    Jupiter walked over and opened the door, scanning through all his uniforms and casual clothes for the fancy dress section he had. “Here they are! Let’s make sure they still fit first,” she cheerfully brought the dress and tux out and unzipped them from their bags.

    The floor-length, tiered, silk, embroidered magenta gown was a bit tighter than Jupiter remembered, but it still fit quite nicely. It was strapless and had a ruffled upper section, a thick lace part that covered her stomach and the billowing skirt. Saturn’s dark blue tuxedo was also slightly tighter than before but looked very fashionable on him.

    “Looks like we’re set, huh?” he remarked as she smiled at him and nodded.

    “We just need flowers and we’ll be ready to win!” Jupiter kissed him on the cheek and decided to see if Team Galactic’s garden had anything interesting blooming this time of year.


    “Sooooo, Cyrus, the Villain’s Ball is coming up tomorrow, do you, uh, have a date yet?” Mars asked her boss as she set on his desk while he attempted to organize paperwork.

    “No I do not. I know what you are thinking about, because I assume you do not have a date either. Thus I shall ask you, as is customary. Commander Mars, would it be an acceptable arrangement to you to accompany me to the Villain’s Ball as my companion?” Cyrus responded, causing Mars to squee in happiness.

    “Of course Cyrus sweetie! Now we have to go shopping for clothes together, yay!” she cheered, dragging him out of his office as he attempted to escape, saying he still had work to do.

    I thank you for reading, and prompt you to review, if it would be convenient. ^^ *Nutty and Yeti begin trekking down from Alaska with all the gold*

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Almost everywhere


    Wait, so that's it? That had to be the shortest chapter ever. Thus being so, there is nothing I can say about it.
    Team Galactic fanatic. Sinfulshipping supporter. Ginga 411 member.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Sheesh, it WAS short... Originally it was supposed to be coupled with the first Chapter Nine, hence a longer section, buuut, I added a chapter. Tis finished, now. Original character time, >.>, sorry guys.

    Chapter Nine - The Chapter That Didn’t Originally Exist Because I Got Irritated

    My apologies for the shortness of Eight, it was meant to go in sync with the original Nine, but then I discovered… Cyrus STILL had a problem! AHHHH! Thus, um, Cyrus Chapter V. 2.0, less drunk, more emotionless, and no actual Mars appearance, yay! What is she doing during all this? Mmmm, mmm, I’m thinking Dawn. Ahhhh yeaaaaah.

    “You, uh, asked to see us, sir?” Saturn queried, standing in the front door of Cyrus’ office of loneliness with Jupiter and Private Oxy behind him. “Yes, I did. I am having a bit of a dilemma that I require your help in resolving. Please, enter and sit down,” Cyrus beckoned for the three to walk in and take seats. Reluctantly, the trio did.

    “Private Oxy, I presume. It is a pleasure to meet you, the commanders have made many reports about you,” the boss reached out to shake hands with the tentacle monster. [Dang, maybe Dawn will have to make a reappearance…] “Yeah, that’s me. I been hearing a lot about you, namely you, sir, have a problem with your favorite subordinate. That why we’re here?” the deductive Deoxys determined.

    “That is a correct assumption.”

    "Well, good, cause back on my home asteroid I was the resident private eye, militia AND counselor! I lived on the roughest, toughest, party-hard asteroid with the most crime rates and screwed-up Deoxys you’ll ever meet, mind you. Obvious why I took up drinking now?” Private Oxy took a swig of rum as he spoke, leaning back and rocking in his chair. “Yeah, it kinda is, if that’s the kinda place you came from,” Jupiter rather stupidly said in a rather stupid tone. Saturn shook his head as Oxy looked at her, wondering why she was so dumb but not blonde.

    “Now that we have settled that matter, I require second opinions on my hypothesis regarding Commander Mars,” he paused, tentatively watching their reactions. “Continue,” Saturn urged, waiting expectantly for details.

    “I believe the Commander is in love with me-” “DUH!” the other three cut him off, laughing that he wasn’t 101% sure she was.

    “As I was saying, I believe she loves me. I also believe she thinks I love her back, and she wishes to pursue a romantic relationship with me. What are your opinions on this situation?” he concluded, looking almost embarrassed talking about love.

    “Well, do you love her back? That’s the first point of business to determine,” Saturn asked confidently. “No, I do not experience emotions, thus I do not love her. She is sorely mistaken,” Cyrus retorted, nearly rolling his eyes before catching himself.

    “Okay, well, do you at least like her, or tolerate her as a constant, annoying presence in your life?” Jupiter put in, thinking about how to best not break poor Mars’ heart. “Commander Mars is my oldest, most favored commander, and her incessant being in my company has started bothering me less and less,” he determined after thinking about the question for a minute.

    “That’s a start. Now, you only slept with her because you don’t get any action otherwise, so, that means you’d continue to do so if the opportunity is present. Have you ever considered getting married, not to her, specifically, but in general?” Oxy contributed, rubbing his head with a tentacle as he pondered the situation.

    “When I was extremely, extremely young, before I took to machinery as opposed to human companionship, I had always accepted the reality I would marry eventually, as most people do. After I became less social, and certainly once I had buried my feelings deep, deep down, the notion was lost from my mind, and I only entertained the thought of sexual acts as a method to provide myself with descendants once I had recreated the universe.”

    “So, you used to, but now you don’t. Well, if you could only pick one female to have your kids, who would it be?” Saturn contemplated the situation carefully, still focusing on the more emotional side of the problem. Jupiter was trying to determine how to tell Mars Cyrus would never love her without breaking her heart, and Private Oxy was examining the more factual aspects, having realized Cyrus worked off logic and facts, not instincts and feelings.

    “Commander Mars, as I have informed her when she asked. She is the female I know best and has obviously expressed a desire to mate with me. Now, is she the most qualified, beneficial female to bear my children in regards to physical stamina, mental intelligence and emotional soundness? Certainly not, however, she would still be my first choice,” Cyrus didn’t have to think about his immediate answer for a second, which the three noticed.

    “What about now, like, you haven’t recreated the universe yet, would you still marry her?” Jupiter asked, having difficulty thinking of important questions. “Out of romantic devotion? No. Because I could? Yes. Because she wants to marry me? Yes,” was the rather cold, logical response. The trio could tell Cyrus was rapidly reverting to his even less emotional self who cared very little for anything but his normally-scheduled day.

    “Let’s say, hypothetically, she was pregnant. With your child, and then with someone else’s child. What would you do then, in the second instance, she does not know the father, and in both she does not want to be a single mother?” Oxy was still digging for Cyrus’ responses to situations.

    “If she could not find the father and would not want to raise the child alone, I would marry her, for the sake of her and the child. If it was mine, I would immediately marry her to try and save my name from disgrace. Both instances there is also the factor of not burdening her with an illegitimate child playing a role. Do not bother asking if I would be upset if the child was not mine, anger and jealousy are emotions I buried first, and I am well aware of her affinity for sleeping with anything that moves.”

    “So, you’re totally fine with marrying her, just as long as it’s clear you have no feelings towards her and don’t love her whatsoever, right?” Saturn deduced proudly, smacking his fist into the palm of his other hand, having discovered something important in the case. “Correct.”

    “Well then, I think you secretly do like-like her, but, you’re also very afraid that someone might hurt her to get to you if anyone ever knew. Am I close?” Jupiter followed up, thinking hard. Something she normally never did.

    “That is one possibility. I would not call it the correct one, however, but my subconscious mind may feel things my consciousness does not. You also must factor in I have lived without emotions for years before meeting the commander. It is a rather convenient coincidence, if you wish to seriously consider I harbor hidden feelings for her,” Cyrus had to admit, looking like he was scrutinizing this potential fact himself.

    “So, she wants to marry you, and you’re totally fine with that, right? I mean, you don’t care one way or another, if she thinks marrying you will make her happy, you’d just tell her to go ahead. But, you have to propose. And it’s obvious she wants you to. There’s that romantic Villain’s Ball thing coming up, right? These two hooligans are obviously going to get engaged at it, so, start looking for a ring, and then if she says anything about wanting to get married too, just tell her the ring’s the only thing holding you back! Perfect, no?” Private Oxy triumphantly concluded, cheerfully bouncing about in his chair.

    “That is a remarkably clever idea. Despite your drunken behavior 99% of the time, you are, in all actuality, much, much more intelligent than my idiotic commanders ever could hope to be. I believe I shall follow your advice, since she obviously greatly desires getting married. Her life has not been an easy one, I would not wish to be one more hardship and heartbreak in it.”

    “So it’s settled, find a nice ring and after the ball propose! Yay, Marzipan’s finally going to get MARRIED!” Saturn and Jupiter did some complex high-five routine before giving Cyrus a thumb’s up and skipping out with Private Oxy, who looked rather confident and cocky at having suggested such an excellent plan of action.

    “I should most likely begin completely reworking my regularly scheduled life. Being married shall throw it horribly out of sync. Now, what in the world kind of metal does Mars prefer?” Cyrus cracked his knuckles as he booted his computer up to start browsing jewelry stores and update his daily plans.

    Chapter Ten - The Villain’s Ball!

    An annual event held during spring, with the Villain’s Beach Bash in summer, Villain’s Smackdown in fall and Villain’s Christmas Party in winter as fellow events for villains, the Villain’s Ball is the most romantic of the four and has a very fierce competition for King and Queen, which has not been won in four years. But this year there are many couples vying for it, and everyone’s favorite Pokemon Master and Top Coordinator will have her hands full judging.

    The teams began filing in, Team Rocket first to sit at Brie’s right hand, Team Galactic second to sit at her left, then Team Cipher next to Team Galactic, the Go-Rock Squad next to Team Rocket, Teams Aqua and Magma taking up remaining sides of the table and leaving the other seats beyond them for smaller groups like Hunter J and the PMC.

    Team Galactic always had the smallest representation of the top four members while Team Rocket’s massive upper class of eight partnered agents, the top scientist, the top weaponry specialist, Professors Nanba and Sebastian, Domino, Giovanni, Madame Boss and four of the bottom-ranked partnered agents accounted for the most.

    Everyone had been shocked to see Saturn and Jupiter walking next to each other with their arms linked and smiling. Cyrus and Mars weren’t as much of a shock to the other villains as the formerly-arch-foes were.

    The blue-and-pink-haired girl sitting at the head of the table looked on in interest with glittering hazel eyes, observing all the couples she would have to choose from. The top trainer in all the lands had a soft spot for villains, namely Teams Rocket and Galactic, and had forbid any law officials from coming near their legal meetings. If some Officer Jenny did, Brie would shoot her.

    She wore a shimmering blue dress with a silver tiara with diamonds and sapphires and had two Porygon-Z floating next to her, a normal male and a shiny female. Her hair had hundreds of tiny curls held together by a ponytail on top of her head and her bangs, almost identical to those of her cousin, also in attendance, and his partner. She waved to Butch when he walked in and he waved back.

    Once everyone had taken a seat, Brie began speaking the usual statements about how it was an honor to have everyone, she hoped they’d all been well, enjoy the food, yada yada yada.

    The one thing everyone wanted was to know who the heck won the King and Queen Award.

    Brie eyed Jupiter, hair down and curled, and Saturn, hair sleeked perfectly into position, carefully, deciding to do some research when everyone started dancing.

    After the conversation and meal finished, all the couples went to the dance floor while Brie slipped off to see what she could dig up about this unexpected pair.

    She discovered they had gone to school together and won every king and queen award except senior prom, when they’d broken up and went their separate ways before joining Team Galactic separately. It can only be assumed they’ve gotten back together, but is it solely for the purpose of winning? They’re wearing the same clothes they did at the one place they lost at… to redeem the outfits, perhaps? I’ll have to study them before ruling them out…

    So the sly master returned to the party and observed the goings-on and who was taking the spotlight.

    To her surprise, it was Saturn and Jupiter who were forcing everyone else to the sidelines so they could take center stage.

    Domino ran over to Brie to protest this indignity. “Like, OMG, they’re soooo totally stealing Team Rocket’s spot! We’ve got sooooo many people who could win this year, get them outta there, they’re ruining our fun!” she whined as Brie shrugged.

    “Just cause they’re better than you doesn’t mean I’ll kick them off the dance floor, yo,” Brie retorted walking off as Domino fumed and returned to the grouping of Rockets.

    Brie sat on the table with her Porygon-Z hovering about her and watched the proceedings. The various partners of Team Rocket, her closest friends, were pretty stiff competition. She’d have to pick from them… although Mars in her bright red dress and Cyrus with his black suit were also mean contenders. And not forgetting the unlikely but present pairing of Jupiter and Saturn…

    Who to pick…

    Eventually the dancing ended and the much-anticipated announcement of the king and queen, if there were to be any, was looming.

    “Yes, yes, I know, it’s time for the moment you’ve all been waiting for. In fact, the moment everyone watching the ball on TV has been waiting for, actually. Will I pick a king and queen this year, or, per usual, turn down all the candidates?

    “Well, first I’ll announce that yes, I have finally selected a couple to win. It was tough, I admit, there were many great classics and a couple surprises, but I think I’ve picked who truly deserves to be King and Queen of the Villain’s Ball. You all know them, and most of you hate them for their looks and rather angry attitudes,” Brie began, pausing as the crowd began murmuring as to who this might be.

    The general consensus was that it was the second-highest Rocket duo, but the top duo doubted this theory, pointing out they severely lacked angry attitudes.

    “So, I’m proud to announce that the winners of this year’s award, the first one in FOUR years,” she paused dramatically and put a hand to her head, pretending she was about to faint.

    “One of my own relations-” she started again but was cut off by Team Rocket cheering, assuming it was either Butch, her cousin, or Johnny, her in-law.

    “I’m so glad you all are so happy for TEAM GALACTIC, MORONS!” Brie screamed at the Rockets, silencing them at once as everyone gasped.

    “How did I find out? Blood test, this certain male has the same highly superior blood as everyone in my noble family of blue-heads.

    “Thus I am proud to announce the winners are NOT from Team Rocket, but Team Galactic, hahaha, and are, naturally, Saturn and Jupiter. Suck it, all you losers,” she concluded proudly, cackling as everyone else stared at her in shock she could decide upon those two.

    Saturn and Jupiter, however, looked at each other, almost surprised they’d won, before screaming and hugging each other.

    Brie just grabbed the crowns and the flowers and walked over to them.

    “Here you guys go. You deserve to win again,” she winked, placing the crowns on their heads and handing Jupiter the flowers before departing to grab the camera.

    Timidly, Saturn called for everyone’s attention as Brie stopped and turned around, eying him knowingly.

    He got down on his knee and pulled a rather large ring case out of his pocket. Everybody else suspiciously stared on at the events taking place before them.

    “This is something I wanted to do several years ago, but never got the chance, so I guess I’ll do it now rather than later. Juliana, the love of my life forever and always, will you marry me?” he cautiously asked, eying her for her reactions.

    “Oh Simon, yes, of course I will!” Jupiter looked like she was about to cry but was trying not to so she didn’t ruin her makeup.

    They hugged once again before he slipped the golden ring with a monstrous diamond on her ring finger.

    All the villains except Cyrus, Mars, Venus and Brie booed.

    “IF YOU ALL DON’T SHUT UP THIS SECOND I’LL BLOW ALL YOUR BRAINS OUT!” Brie roared, silencing everyone as she pulled out an m16.

    “That’s better. Now, piiiiictuuuuure tiiiiiiiime!” she called out, skipping along with the camera to photograph the newly-engaged king and queen.

    “Hey Cyrus, think I’ll ever get to wear a ring like that on my finger?” Mars leaned over and whispered to her boss as she smiled at her fellow commanders.

    “As soon as I find a decent one with high quality for a decent price you shall. It is exceptionally difficult to find a suitable ring,” Cyrus replied, rather disgruntled at his search.

    Mars blushed and looked up at him. Nobody else would’ve seen it, but there was the faintest hint of mischief in his eyes and the most hidden trace of a smile on his lips as he stared back into her eyes almost lovingly.

    She kissed him softly on the lips as Brie finished up snapping images of his commanders.

    Aside from some rather irritated rival teams, all was well, and soon even the bitterest of villains relented their animosity to the mood and congratulated Saturn and Jupiter on making a complete 180 towards each other.

    They just smiled, knowing they had finally come back to their senses and were together again at long last.

    The final tally? Mars 10, Saturn 9, Jupiter 8. Marzipan won.

    I'm not happy with the end, I admit. If anyone wants, I can do a smutty honeymoon Chappie Eleven... o.O 50 pages in Word, at the moment. Nutty and I are off to work on the comedy...
    Plug time! If you enjoyed this story, check out my upcoming Team Galactic Comedy Oneshot series, posted here eventually. *Nutty scolds Yeti for being such a shameful plugger* In any case, thanks for reading, and make plenty of suggestions! ^^

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Almost everywhere


    So that's it, then? It was a pretty good story all-in-all. There were some great quotes. Hmm, yeah, I can't really say anything that I haven't before. I'll be looking for the next Galactic story of yours, though.
    Team Galactic fanatic. Sinfulshipping supporter. Ginga 411 member.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Thanks. ^^ I dunno if this is all, I may add another chapter... tis tempting. Needs more smut, I think. I do believe I shall begin the next story upload tomorrow. ^^ *scuttles off to work on it* Edit: Rank uuuuuup! *does dance with Nutty*

  17. #17
    Join Date
    May 2005


    Man I have nothing else to do, because there's a snow storm going on here... so I spent most of my day finishing this, as well as enjoying every minute of it.

    I have to say, everyone who is stalking this thread right now, stop it, and start reading now. This forum, as everyone knows, does not contain very many well-written works; however, if you search hard enough, you will find great and very enjoyable pieces such as this fic.

    Seriously, I'm disappointed at the lack of reviews this fic received. I barely spend more than a couple seconds a day in this forum tbh, and if I would've seen this, I would've reviewed a long time ago. D: I know this may be off topic, but I am getting to the review part. I just can't believe something as great as this was ignored just because it wasn't Poke/Advance/Contest/Pearl/Ikari/whatever else. This isn't bias coming from me, either, because I AM a fan of many mainstream shippings. :\

    Like I said, this was great and very enjoyable. You really gave it your all in each chapter. You gave the members of TG backstory that I would've never guessed or thought about, and each fit perfectly with their characters. Like, some people are just like, TG IS SO EVIL WTF MAN!!!!! but you proved to everyone reading that they are human, too, despite being villains.

    You got Cyrus to a T - I know it must have been hard to write him (as well as Cyrus/Mars) since he's so void lol.

    Your personality shined throughout the fic, too, giving it a lot of originality. A lot of things were quote-worthy, haha. If anyone else had tried to write something like this they would've failed hard, but then again idk if anyone could come up with something as awesome as this. 8)

    Something I also liked was the description of events and everything - you didn't drag it out (well, maybe with the Cyrus chapter, but I think that was necessary in order for us to learn more about him) or cut it too short. It was detailed but to the point, if that makes sense.

    Private Oxy/Deoxys had me loling, btw, as well as drunken Cyrus and Mars.

    Uh what else...I think that's it. You definitely got me into Saturn/Jupiter - consider me a fan now.

    It make take me a while to review your other fics but I'll try and get to them as soon as I can. Ty for linking me to such a wonderful story. <3 Hopefully other people will read it, too, and give you the reviews you deserve.

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