Page 4 of 9 FirstFirst 12345678 ... LastLast
Results 76 to 100 of 222

Thread: Good Love Charm (Advanceshipping, PG-13)

  1. #76
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Unda da sea
    Posts
    4,599

    Default

    Aw, I was just about to go to bed. But what the hell, right? I love this fic, so I just HAD to stay up and read. And now review.

    Anyways, specific points:

    "Gunk." the small, frog-like Croagunk replied, smiling proudly as it admired the bandaged fist which had dealt Brock the silencing blow. The purple Pokemon then proceeded to take a seat next to Pikachu and watch the match proceedings.

    Both May and Blaziken groaned as they heard the commotion coming from Brock's seat. The young coordinator giggled to herself, looking over to where a young trainer had just entered the hall and was finding his seat next to his happy Pikachu and the wounded breeder in question.

    'They haven't changed a bit.' she thought to herself, then blushed a little. 'Well... Ash IS more handsome than I remember...'
    Ah, Croagunk. It means well. At least, I think so...

    Good transition from a 'Brock-Croagunk Moment' to May on the stage. And some little Shippy thoughts about Ash are always good.

    Ash didn't reply and instead remained silent, waiting for the match to start. What May had told him about her experiences with Drew in Johto still bothered him; she hadn't actually explained how it had all happened, but Ash surmised that it was probably best not to ask the girl for too many details. After all, it seemed like a touchy subject for her and he didn't want to hit a nerve. May was back with them and that was all that he cared about. He was so happy, in fact, that he didn't want the day to end because he knew that, when it did, May would turn around and leave for Johto once again.

    Ash frowned as memories of their journey through the Kanto region flooded back into his mind. He remembered her goodbye so vividly - seeing her wave from the boat; her proud, confident smile more brilliant than the setting sun which covered the ocean's waves like a thin blanket of gold. He didn't want her to ever be so far away from him again, no matter how selfish it seemed.
    Dear Lord. Could Ash.....be.......experiencing.....feelings.....for a girl? {faints from shock}

    Good description. Ash knows he has some strong feelings for May, that possibly transcend friendship, he just doesn't understand them yet.

    "I have a feeling I know who taught her that strategy!" Brock exclaimed from the stands as he, Ash, Pikachu and Croagunk all sat transfixed at the spectacular display.

    Ash turned to Brock for a moment, curious.

    "What do you mean, Brock?" he asked, but Brock just smiled.

    "You taught her a lot of things, Ash." the breeder explained. "If it hadn't been for you May would have never gotten where she is today."

    "Nah!" Ash disregarded Brock's comments with a wave of his hand. "Come on; May got here all by herself, I had nothing to do with it!"

    "Heh," Brock chuckled knowingly, "if you say so, Ash..."

    "Pikachu..." Pikachu added.
    Yeah, May did imprint on Ash a bit. Even if they don't travel together any more, she still remembers all he taught her. Obviously, Ash doesn't want to acknowledge that (maybe it makes him feel old, or something). Of course, to pick up his strategies, May would have had to watch Ash closely.......I wonder why?

    Brock glanced nervously towards the Croagunk sitting on the arm of his chair, its bandaged fist ready to strike at any moment, and breathed a deep sigh.
    lol

    May chuckled, gratefully shaking her opponent's hand. She looked up towards the stands where she could see Ash, Brock and Pikachu cheering excitedly at her victory, and her smile only intensified, her heart fluttering at the sight of the boy who had supported her through so much.

    "Ash..."
    Awwwwwww! How sweet!

    Dawn had little time to comfort her Pokemon as Piplup was snatched away from her by Cassidy and she felt herself being pulled by her collar towards the storage room, where only now could she see numerous coordinators bound and gagged, watching her helplessly. She heard footsteps as the man named Butch continued to drag her towards the rear of the room and soon she saw Nico standing just above her, returning Piplup to its Pokeball.

    "Nico, why?" she stammered. "Why are you doing this!?"

    Nico stared down at the girl who seemed to be delirious with fear and confusion, her eyes welling up with tears as she began to worry about what would become of Piplup and her other Pokemon. He considered her position for a moment and wondered if she deserved pity, an apology, or simply silence. Finally he gave his answer.

    "Because it's my job."
    Poor Dawn. First that crushing loss to Drew, and now this. I hope she can handle everthing...

    I was actually starting to like Nico, but you've pretty much killed off all of that. Now I see he's a bad guy, I've had to reassess my opinion of him.

    Good cliffhanger as well. We'll just have to see what happens with regard to May meeting Nico, or if the Final battle between Drew and May goes forward.

    Overview:

    Great chapter. The battle was excellently written and described, as always. Less Ash/May interaction, but I'm sure you'll make up for that in the next chapter or two. Nico's true colours have shone through, making even less decent than already portrayed. Paul is free, as are (most of) his Pokemon, but at what price? Dawn has been captured, meaning there's even more at stake for our heroes.....

    Once they realise what's going on behind the scenes of course....

    One question though: Is Alisa in on all this? Since it's her father's operation and all. Just a query of min, don't feel obliged to answer it.

    I really need to improve my reviewing skills....

    As said, great chapter, good to see it up so quickly after the last one.

    Looking foward (extremely) to the next chap!
    Dave
    Former OSL Water Gym Leader, PASBL League Official, TL6, A- Ref, Dark Gym Leader, Fizzy Bubbles

    Random arts by DaisyInari


    Feel like a different style of battling? Where your Charizard isn't useless
    because your opponent has Stealth Rock up? Why not check out the:

    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    ASB has it's own subforum where you can can start with a basic squad of whatever
    first-stage Pokémon you want, and work your way up! Not sure how to begin?
    We have a Getting Started thread that covers the basics, plus you can ask for help in our Time Out Chat Thread.


  2. #77
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Graduating Class of 2009!
    Posts
    902

    Default

    Can I first start this review by saying that.was.so.good. Oh my God, this was one of the few times I decided to sit and read more than two chapters at a time. Yeah, it was that good.

    I love how you set up your fanfic - whether on purpose or on accident- where first we the readers were just interested in the story and then as the chapters went by we were drawn in to the story because of one- the romance, and two- the strange behind the scenes thing going on with team rocket

    And omg, what a way to end the chapter! I'm disappointed though, that there weren't three more chapters I could read.

    In conclusion, awesome advanceshippy fanfic. Your writing is superb and was very pleasing to read!!!

    (I'm trying to sound smart, could you tell? lol! JKJK)
    ~*Uza-chan's Good bye*~

    IS SUPAH FIIIINE

  3. #78
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    The Pltomaios
    Posts
    93

    Default

    Nico wasn't worried about what Drew thought of him, because the feelings were completely mutual. He was far more concerned with what his employer might say.
    Eh? Employer?
    "You know I don't expect you to lose." Kendrick continued, his voice almost groaning with exasperation as he spoke. "You've been like a son to me for all this time and this is how you repay me?"
    Oh. Him. Oh dear.
    Nico smiled and said nothing; instead turning again and heading towards the storage chamber where one of the members of Team Rocket was waiting for him. He had a new mission, and he was determined to accomplish it at any cost.
    Again, oh dear. I hope Nico does a Heel Face Turn.
    Minako was quite tall and had an elegant composure, like that of a dancer. She possessed long, blonde hair which trailed all the way down to her lower back and her eyes were a very bright blue.
    She's from Sailor Moon, right?
    Last edited by Ariel_Anderson; 14th June 2008 at 7:55 AM.

  4. #79
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Nowhere near You
    Posts
    238

    Default

    I had a long review typed out, but Serebii refused to accept it.

    Anyhow, long thing short, that was a sweet chapter. It's kinda sad that Dawn seems to get a little manhandled/hurt in a few advanceshipping fics I've read (including mine), but that's to be expected if she keeps an annoying mascot (POCHA) with her. I swear, it seems to be a subconscious hatred we transfer onto the poor trainer.

    Anyway, Piplup-annoyance aside, let's see what Paul decides to do. And I liked the fluff, as always.

  5. #80
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    837

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gaiash View Post
    I really picked a good time to read this, each new chapter makes it more and more interesting. I really like the last names you've given various characters.
    Haha, thanks; the anime really gives us way too little info on names sometimes.

    Quote Originally Posted by DaveTheFishGuy View Post
    Poor Dawn. First that crushing loss to Drew, and now this. I hope she can handle everthing...
    Heh, reading through the fic it seems as though I hate Dawn, but that's really not true. She's just a magnet for drama, I guess ^^;;;

    Quote Originally Posted by DaveTheFishGuy View Post
    I was actually starting to like Nico, but you've pretty much killed off all of that. Now I see he's a bad guy, I've had to reassess my opinion of him.
    Aww, I guess not everybody loves a good villain ^^;;

    Quote Originally Posted by DaveTheFishGuy View Post
    One question though: Is Alisa in on all this? Since it's her father's operation and all. Just a query of min, don't feel obliged to answer it.
    I would answer that, but instead I'm just going to say "wait and see" :D

    Your review skills are really good, by the way - you comment on lots of things and so it's good for me to know what you guys really enjoy most; so don't worry about them ^^

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    Can I first start this review by saying that.was.so.good. Oh my God, this was one of the few times I decided to sit and read more than two chapters at a time. Yeah, it was that good.

    I love how you set up your fanfic - whether on purpose or on accident- where first we the readers were just interested in the story and then as the chapters went by we were drawn in to the story because of one- the romance, and two- the strange behind the scenes thing going on with team rocket

    And omg, what a way to end the chapter! I'm disappointed though, that there weren't three more chapters I could read.

    In conclusion, awesome advanceshippy fanfic. Your writing is superb and was very pleasing to read!!!

    (I'm trying to sound smart, could you tell? lol! JKJK)
    lol, are you mocking my review of your one-shot? :p

    But really, thank you! That means so much coming from a big-name shipping author! Your words are way too kind ^^;;; But I really appreciate them so thank you! :D

    And by the way, thanks - I was really pleased with how the chapter ended, myself ^^ I love drama :D

    Quote Originally Posted by Ariel_Anderson View Post
    She's from Sailor Moon, right?
    Yeah, I've been watching too much of it lately so it stuck :p Plus I've been in a Jolteon phase, so it kinda made sense. It's a little inside-joke of mine to steal anime characters when I need extras, if you've noticed ^^;

    Quote Originally Posted by EarthBorn View Post
    I had a long review typed out, but Serebii refused to accept it. :(

    Anyhow, long thing short, that was a sweet chapter. It's kinda sad that Dawn seems to get a little manhandled/hurt in a few advanceshipping fics I've read (including mine), but that's to be expected if she keeps an annoying mascot (POCHA) with her. I swear, it seems to be a subconscious hatred we transfer onto the poor trainer.

    Anyway, Piplup-annoyance aside, let's see what Paul decides to do. And I liked the fluff, as always.
    Haha, I never really minded Piplup that much. Perhaps I'm just harbouring a bitterness towards Dawn for replacing May and this is my way of venting. But you gotta admit, it does add up for some nice drama and raises the stakes quite considerably :D

    Thanks for all the reviews, people; I always enjoy reading them ^^
    Good Love Charm
    *COMPLETE*

  6. #81
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Switzerland, Europe
    Posts
    1,469

    Default

    hah, it's Saturday, so I have time to review and not prepare my exams xD

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    Chapter Eight:
    Nico's Decision

    Cheers and applause continued to erupt from the crowd in the main hall of the carnival's tent, bombarding the speechless Nico from every side of the arena. He continued to stare down in disbelief at his Glalie's Pokeball, unable to quite grasp the fact that he had lost his match against Drew: that arrogant, egotistical, snide coordinator who began to walk away towards the backstage of the tent after recalling his Absol from the battlefield.
    Right about now, I feel that Nico will be a much more than a side character appearing for contest alone. I believe you're planning on making him have a much more imporant part here...

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    Both May and Blaziken groaned as they heard the commotion coming from Brock's seat. The young coordinator giggled to herself, looking over to where a young trainer had just entered the hall and was finding his seat next to his happy Pikachu and the wounded breeder in question.

    'They haven't changed a bit.' she thought to herself, then blushed a little. 'Well... Ash IS more handsome than I remember...'
    lol

    focus May ! xD


    Well, besides that, killer battle, nice development (I really didn't see Nico being part of Kendrick's "family" though ^^') and can't wait to see what Nico wants with May...

    Though I'm thinking of something sinister, with Ash saving the day

    Poor Dawn This really isn't her day, she's scared to death nearly...

    Keep it up
    Because of serebiiforums, my Life has been put on hold...

    ...wait, that sounds wrong...
    ...yeah, it's the other way around.

    My Works : A, B, C, D, E

  7. #82
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Graduating Class of 2009!
    Posts
    902

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    lol, are you mocking my review of your one-shot?

    But really, thank you! That means so much coming from a big-name shipping author! Your words are way too kind ^^;;; But I really appreciate them so thank you!

    And by the way, thanks - I was really pleased with how the chapter ended, myself ^^ I love drama
    ahahah, I've attempted, but failed. Hey, not to say I didn't like your review, but I felt like poking fun at it xD

    I can't believe you think of me as a big-name!!!

    Oh wait, this is your fanfic, not mine... eheheh

    I forgot to mention that when I first read about Nico I thought he was just a one-time OC but then he became bigger and now look at him!!! I have to say I'm very pleased that you have Paul in your fic. It's simply not a sinnoh-setting fanfic without him =D

    waiting for the next chapter....

    EDIT: RANK UP!!! I didn't even notice it until now xD
    Last edited by Uzamaki Hinata; 14th June 2008 at 9:58 PM.
    ~*Uza-chan's Good bye*~

    IS SUPAH FIIIINE

  8. #83
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    England
    Posts
    5,440

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    Haha, thanks; the anime really gives us way too little info on names sometimes.
    I've noticed Maple is a common sername name for May to have in fanfics. Any idea how that started?

    Anyway back to your fanfic, I'm interested in what is going on with Nico.

  9. #84
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    The Pltomaios
    Posts
    93

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    It's a little inside-joke of mine to steal anime characters when I need extras, if you've noticed ^^;
    Yeah, I have. If you remember, I was the one who spotted Meyrin.
    Last edited by Ariel_Anderson; 21st June 2008 at 10:30 AM.

  10. #85

    Default

    Great chapter as usual, and it totally blew my mind when Nico's true character unfolded. I also his new pokemon as well. : D

    Other things I liked about this chapter was May using a play from Ash's book. It was pretty awesome and I feel Ash would be the type to not take credit for it, he only does that for comical purposes mostly. ;P But yes, the details of the battle were as usual, very good as well as your original characters you develop like Nico and Kendrick.


    Also, you write Paul awesome. Period.
    I waste my life away on Nico Nico Douga.

  11. #86
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    837

    Default

    Alright, here it is; the new Advanceshipping thread set me off track a bit with the fic but I think it was worth it. *shameless plug* Go check out the awesome new thread! */shameless plug* This chapter was a lot of fun to write and is also my favourite thus far, so I'm curious to see what you guys think of it. It's also by far the biggest chapter so far, so be sure to grab some popcorn before sitting down to read it!

    Chapter Nine:
    May vs Drew? Decisive Battle!!
    (Part One)

    An infectious grin covered May's face from ear to ear as she made her way to the carnival's waiting room, eagerly psyching herself up for her next battle: the all-important final. Her adrenaline level was still soaring as high as could be and her heart was pounding as she recounted all of the matches she had won in order to come this far. It had been a difficult tournament and every last one of her opponents had been a competitor of the highest quality - to be completely honest she was surprised that she had managed to stay so consistently strong throughout the contest.

    May smiled as she thought of how far she had come. She wasn't the spoilt little girl who was stuck in Petalburg City anymore.

    May was so excited about her previous win in the tournament that she didn't even notice her arrival at the tent's waiting room - she was in full autopilot mode; her hand instinctively reaching for the door as she made her way inside, only to be greeted by a pair of green eyes that were waiting for her.

    The young girl's heart leapt into her throat as she saw the boy with the lime-green hair stare blankly at her, his face completely void of anything that could even be remotely described as an expression. Drew's stare was yet another reminder of why May had made such a grievous mistake in her decision to date the successful Pokemon coordinator during her brief time in the Johto region.

    "Looks like you're through to the final." Drew stated coldly, his tone causing May to turn her head and walk past him defiantly.

    "Yeah, that's right." she answered just as bluntly as she made her way towards the far corner of the room where a collection of chairs were idly positioned. The young girl took a seat on one of them and began unzipping her fanny pack, then stopped when she noticed her rival's shadow creeping over her.

    May looked up towards the boy and was met with the same, cold stare as before. She frowned a little and stared right back at him.

    "Something I can help you with?" she asked, her words causing Drew to smile before replying.

    "Come on, May." he said to the girl softly, sitting down beside her. May shuffled awkwardly away from the boy in response. "Don't be like that."

    "Like what?" May snapped, frowning at the coordinator who seemed unfazed by her glares. "Are you telling me I should just forget about what you did to me?"

    "I can't believe you're still seriously mad about that!" Drew groaned, flicking his green hair idly away from his forehead as if he were a famous movie star. "I already explained myself."

    "I don't need it explained to me, Drew!" May responded. "I saw you with my own eyes! You two were all over each other! Do you really think that just giving me that same old smile is going to change the fact that you cheated on me?"

    "Please, May," Drew laughed, waving the girls criticisms away, "you're overreacting way too much. It was just a kiss, that's all. Cheating is way too strong a word."

    "Oh, so I'm overreacting, am I?" May growled, clenching her fists tightly as the anger inside of her welled up like magma inside a volcano. "You don't even care about how much you hurt me, do you?"

    "You hurt yourself by getting so worked up about all this." Drew defended himself, his smile intensifying as he gazed at the young coordinator. "You know you look so beautiful when you're angry..."

    May could feel the boy's eyes all over her body, as if he were a snake slowly coiling around her, ready to toy with its newfound prey. She used to love when he looked at her like that; now it just made her feel dirty. She also knew that he only ever did it when he wanted something though, and right on cue Drew began moving closer to her, his hand gently brushing some loose strands of her brown hair away from her face.

    "Come on, May." Drew whispered, his breath softly caressing her face as his lips moved closer to hers, their faces mere inches apart. "Let's just forget about all this and go back to how it was before."

    Once again May felt shivers running down her spine as Drew said all the right words and touched all the right spots. His other hand began to trail down the girl's stomach and then rub her thigh gently - it was just like the first time they had ever kissed and she began to lose herself in his embrace once more. He had held her like she'd wanted to be held, touched her like she'd wanted to be touched and whispered all the right words in her ear. But their kiss - it was strange; not like May had imagined her first kiss to be at all. It felt good, there was no question about that - Drew was an expert after all - but, at the same time it had felt so empty; so meaningless.

    Suddenly May snapped out of her daze and she shoved the boy away, getting to her feet and backing away from him.

    "Don't touch me!" she yelled. "I don't ever want you to touch me again!!"

    Drew scowled at this response, steadying himself as he stood up as well and confronted the girl.

    "You belong to me, May!" he shouted back. "No-one else is allowed to touch you but me!"

    "You're pathetic!" May snapped. "I'm not your trophy, you know!"

    Drew growled, then noticed the girl's fanny pack where half of a pink ribbon with bold, white edges was on the verge of falling out. May soon noticed the boy's glance and hurriedly pushed the trinket back inside, zipping the pack up as quickly as she could.

    "Oh, I see." Drew commented, gritting his teeth as he did so. "This is about him. That's why you're here!"

    "I..." May stammered uncertainly. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

    "So you came all the way here to see HIM." Drew snarled. "I'm not letting that ignorant moron lay one finger on you, May! He doesn't deserve you!"

    "Don't you dare talk about Ash like that!" May exclaimed. "He's twice the man you'll ever be, Drew!"

    "Oh, I don't think so!" Drew began. "I-"

    Drew's voice was interrupted by the sound of the waiting room door being pushed open. Immediately the two coordinators did their best to regain their composure and waved courteously towards Alisa, who made her way over to them, an eager smile on her face.

    "Congratulations you two!" she applauded the two of them. "You guys were simply incredible! I feel honoured to have hosted this competition - you really have been so awesome throughout the whole thing."

    "Oh," May stammered, her cheeks flushing a light pink, "thanks Alisa."

    "It was nothing." Drew agreed, folding his arms confidently.

    Just then the sound of more footsteps could be heard and May managed to allow a grin to cover her face when she saw him along with his two friends and Pikachu.

    "Ash!" she called over, waving to him as if they were in the most crowded of rooms. Drew watched the girl out of the corner of his eye, an envious glare cast towards the young Pokemon trainer who was now approaching them, though fortunately Ash didn't seem to notice this.

    "Hey May!" Ash greeted his friend, Pikachu riding on his shoulder as Brock and Paul both walked closely behind him. "Congratulations!"

    "Pikachu!" Pikachu added, smiling happily as May reached out and gently scratched the little creature's chin. "Chaaaa!"

    "Thanks, you guys!" May accepted the congratulations as modestly as she could. "And thanks for cheering for me, Ash."

    May smiled at the boy and gave him a sly wink.

    "But you know you don't have to keep jumping out of your seat every five minutes just for little old me."

    "Wha-!" Ash coughed, his face turning bright red as an intense blush took over him. "I wasn't, uh, I mean-"

    "Sorry to interrupt this happy get-together you guys," Alisa chuckled, "but we're going to have to cut this short. You see it's getting late and we're running behind schedule. May, Drew - could I ask you to make your way to the stage? We need to begin the final round right away."

    Drew and May both exchanged a brief glance to one another before nodding their heads in unison.

    "Thanks!" Alisa said, smiling. "I've gotta get to the commentary box but good luck to both of you! I'm sure it'll be a great match!"

    The rest of the room watched as the young woman made her way to the exit and soon vanished from sight. There was a brief silence for a moment before Drew turned to face May once again.

    "Good luck in the final, May." he offered, his familiar, knowing smile returning to his face once more. "But I'm not going to be holding back this time."

    With those words said Drew cast a brief look of disgust towards Ash before following Alisa's trail and heading out the door. Ash, May, Brock, Paul and Pikachu all watched the coordinator leave and another awkward silence held the room in its gloomy embrace.

    "Well guys," May began, turning back to face her friends once more, "I'd better get going, too."

    "Good luck out there, May!" Ash exclaimed, pumping his fist excitedly.

    "Pika Pika!" Pikachu imitated its trainer happily, a light shower of sparks emitting from its cheeks.

    "Thanks you guys!" May giggled excitedly, smiling straight at the boy who meant so much to her. "Don't worry; Blaziken and I will make you proud!"

    With their well wishes said the group said their goodbyes and Ash and Brock headed out the door. Ash paused for a moment as he realised Paul wasn't moving.

    "What's wrong, Paul?" Ash asked, clearly puzzled. "Aren't you coming?"

    "Oh, uh, yeah," Paul managed, not entirely sure of what his excuse should be, "I just wanted to... Uh, to ask May something."

    "Oh." Ash muttered in response, wondering what on earth Paul could want to ask May about. "Okay then, we'll see you in the stands! Good luck, May!"

    May cheerfully waved as her friends left the room and she was left standing opposite Paul, whose demeanour was as gruff and aloof as ever. They had never been formally introduced but May recognised the boy from earlier when she and Ash had first had their reunion. Though he appeared stern and serious Paul had a different aura from that of someone like Nico and if he had been watching the contest with Ash she was certain that he was a nice person, regardless of his rather intimidating appearance.

    "You wanted to ask me something?" May enquired curiously.

    Paul took a moment to think of his answer; he really hadn't planned this event through very thoroughly. He had no personal grudge against the girl - indeed, she seemed like a very accomplished Pokemon trainer: anyone who was able to successfully command a Blaziken in battle had to have his respect. Paul had no real clue what Nico's plan was but the fact that the boy was working with Team Rocket lead him to believe that he did not have May's best interests at heart.

    Regardless of what Nico wanted Paul knew that he had to get that last Pokemon back.

    Eventually he spoke up, sighing a little as he did so.

    "Ash..." he explained hesitantly. "Ash wanted me to tell you that, uh... That he wants to meet you in this room after the match is over. Alone."

    May blinked at the boy in confusion. Ash? What did Ash want to meet up with her for? And why did they have to be alone? Was it something that he couldn't talk about in front of Brock? May's mind began to wander through all the possibilities, excited at what her friend might want to tell her. Was he going to offer to travel with her? Was he going to invite her out for a celebratory dinner?

    A coy smile then crossed her lips.

    Could it be... He liked her?

    "Alright, thanks!" May replied in her typically cheerful way. "Oh, I don't think we were introduced, were we? I'm May."

    May extended her hand in friendship to the boy, who analysed it nonchalantly, his own hands remaining firmly in his pockets.

    "Paul." he said, turning away and heading towards the exit. He paused for a moment as he reached the door, then glanced over at the girl who was watching him, puzzled. "And May."

    An uncomfortable silence penetrated the waiting room as Paul carefully mulled over his words before finally committing to them.

    "Be careful."

    With those final words Paul excused himself from the waiting room, leaving May on her own to consider them carefully.

    'Careful?' she wondered. 'Careful of what?'

    It was just Ash, wasn't it? May had nothing to be careful about when she was with her best friend; he was the one person she could be completely at ease with the most. May smiled to herself and approached the backstage exit of the waiting room, the chanting echos of the crowd rumbling just ahead of her. Looking down towards her fanny pack she undid the zipper and removed the small, pink ribbon from earlier, admiring it as she had done so many times in Johto when she had felt lost and alone.

    After taking a moment to look at the item lovingly she clipped it to the left breast of her jacket and placed her hands over her heart so she could check how securely she had attached it. Finally May took a deep breath and opened the door, her destination firmly set in her mind.

    She knew she couldn't lose. After all, she had him watching over her.

    Her good luck charm.

    ~*~*~

    Time continued to tick inexorably away as Nico anxiously stared at his Poketch. They only had a few minutes to carry out the rest of their plan and everything hinged on a strictly timed schedule.

    Nico sighed to himself. The air was thick and heavy with the glares of numerous Pokemon coordinators all seated behind him as Butch and Cassidy both finished tying up the last of their victims; the runner-up of the last semi-final round. The door was left open and the boy's Shiftry was standing guard beside it, its sinister eyes scanning the hallway for any signs of movement amongst the shadows.

    Nico had a difficult balancing act to perform: on the one hand he needed to ensure that Team Rocket was accompanied at all times; Kendrick was very specific about always keeping an eye on them, particularly during such a critical point in the operation. On the other hand, however, Nico also needed time to excuse himself and meet up with May. Though this wasn't an initial part of his plan it was still important to him, and he felt confident that there would be a way to fulfill both criteria at the same time.

    After all, where there was a will, there was a way...

    The boy watched the two Team Rocket grunts deposit the last of their prizes into the cart filled with Pokeballs. They then hefted up the handles on either side of the contraption, ready to roll their stolen goods away. Cassidy cast a glance towards Nico, snapping him out of his thoughts.

    "We need to get going now." she insisted, and Nico nodded in full agreement. He glanced towards his Poketch once more. Six-thirty-nine PM.

    "Right. You two get the Pokeballs out of here and I'll meet you at the rendezvous point with Officer Kendrick." Nico explained, causing both of the agents to stare at him rather curiously.

    "What about you?" Butch enquired.

    "Shiftry." Nico spoke up, turning to the Pokemon that was continuing to keep a vigilant eye over the corridor of the tent. "I need you to escort these two to the rendezvous point for me."

    "Shif?" the boy's Grass-type Pokemon responded, somewhat puzzled by its new orders, however the creature readily accepted its new assignment. "Shiftry!"

    "Good." Nico smiled at his Pokemon, confident in its ability to keep a watchful eye on the two members of Team Rocket in his absence. "I'm counting on you."

    With his orders set Nico turned and headed towards the door, only to be stopped by Cassidy's objections.

    "Wait just a second!" the woman loudly protested. "You don't honestly expect us to take orders from a Pokemon, do you?"

    Nico stopped, a confident smile passing from him to his Shiftry and back again before he turned around to reply to the woman.

    "I'm not expecting you to do it, Cassidy." he answered bluntly. "I'm ordering you to."

    Both Butch and Cassidy gritted their teeth in anger at the boy's display of authority and power, yet both of them knew there was nothing they could do about it. They had come so close to completing this mission and they knew that such a large-scale heist was certain to put them back into a favourable position with Giovanni after their abysmal failures in the Kanto region recently.

    "Keep an eye on them." Nico added to his Shiftry before exiting the storage room and leaving the trio to proceed with their escape.

    As the boy moved from out of the doorway his eyes caught a glimpse of the young girl who sat sobbing in the corner, her blue eyes glistening with tears. Nico watched her for a moment, a strange emotion welling up inside of him, but he paid it no heed. After all, he had more important things on his mind right now.

    ~*~*~

    "Alright ladies and gentlemen!" Alisa's voice boomed throughout the carnival tent as both May and Drew took to their respective positions on either side of the stage. "This is the moment you've all been waiting for! These two coordinators have battled their way through everything we've thrown at them but now they're down to the final stretch!"

    The audience's cheers and applause continued to spill forth like an enormous wave which crashed against the unprepared shore as Alisa did her best to hype up the crowd in her typical way.

    "And now without any further ado," Alisa continued, "May Maple; Drew Blackthorne: release your Pokemon!"

    "Come on out, Absol!" Drew called, elegantly spinning his choice of Pokeball into the centre of the stage where the Dark-type Pokemon appeared, completely calm and serene despite the crowd's incredible volume.

    "Your turn, Blaziken!" May exclaimed, winding up and throwing her own Pokeball into the arena. "Take the stage!"

    Blaziken's impressive silhouette was ejected onto the stage and soon the fiery aura of its vivid, red feathers overpowered the white light of the Pokeball which once housed it. The crowd continued to marvel in awe of the two coordinators' impeccably impressive Pokemon and the match timer was officially set to five minutes. The preparations were finally complete, and May and Drew watched each other carefully from either side of the stage, both relishing the sheer excitement of the coming final round.

    "And..." Alisa prepared as the crowd held their breath in anticipation. "Contestants begin!"

    With a loud beep the match timer began its countdown and neither coordinator wasted any time in issuing their attacks.

    "Sky Uppercut, Blaziken!" May ordered, pointing confidently towards Drew's Absol.

    "Flash into Water Pulse, Absol!" Drew countered, equally pumped.

    Both Pokemon immediately began to follow their respective trainer's commands, leaping forward to begin the battle. Absol's Flash was cut short, however, by a loud explosion in the centre of the contest stage which sent a pillar of smoke rising up towards the ceiling. The entirety of the main hall gasped in surprise and confusion as they looked towards the source of the explosion where a collection of four mysterious figures was now standing, their features veiled by the thick, black haze.

    "Listen," a woman's voice declared amidst the hiss of the smoke, "are those voices I hear?"

    "They're gasping to me loud and clear." a male voice replied.

    "On the wind." the woman continued.

    "Past the stars." the man answered again as the crowd began to look around in confusion. Both Blaziken and Absol crouched down low to the ground, suspecting an attack from the sudden intruders.

    "In your ear!" another voice declared. This one also sounded like a male's, though it was a lot scratchier and had a unique character all of its own.

    The smoke had now risen completely and the four figures could be seen standing proudly in the centre of the scorched stage. Two of them were humans: a woman with crimson hair and a man whose own was pastel-blue; both of them wore matching white uniforms with a bright red 'R' emblazoned on the chest. Their two smaller companions were Pokemon - a short, confident Meowth and a rather puzzled-looking Wobbuffet that was rubbing its head.

    "Team Rocket?" May gasped. "No way! Aren't they bored yet?"

    "Bringing chaos at a breakneck pace!" Jessie continued their motto.

    "Dashing hope, bringing fear in its place!" James agreed, the two of them pirouetting on the spot.

    "A rose by any other name is just as sweet."

    "When everything is worse, our work is complete."

    "Jessie!"

    "James!"

    "And Meowth!" their furry companion cried, jumping between the two humans. "Now that's a name!"

    Jessie smiled, brushing a few loose strands of red hair away from her face as if she were a supermodel posing for a magazine's photo-shoot.

    "Putting the do-gooders in their place." she laughed.

    "We're Team Rocket!" James spoke up again, putting his back up against Jessie's as the two of them turned to face the crowd.

    "In your face!" Jessie, James and Meowth all yelled at once.

    "Wobbuffet!!" the blue Pokemon by their side shouted, slapping its forehead in agreement with the team's motto.

    By this time the main hall had fallen completely silent and the entire crowd was staring in both awe and confusion at the group of intruders, no-one entirely sure what to make of them.

    "Team Rocket!" Ash growled, getting to his feet.

    "Pika Pika!" Pikachu squeaked, crouching down onto its trainer's shoulder and getting ready to pounce at any moment.

    Paul groaned to himself as he watched the scene unfold.

    'Not now!' he thought worriedly. 'They can't interrupt this final! If May isn't in that waiting room in the next four minutes then I'll never see my Pokemon again!'

    "Oh, no!" Brock exclaimed, standing up beside Ash. "Don't they ever get tired of this?"

    Team Rocket paused and gave themselves the opportunity to listen to the confusion and panic of the audience that they had caused. Drew, however, had no intention of letting this final be interrupted.

    "I don't have time for you clowns today!" he barked, pointing straight towards the trio and their Wobbuffet. "Absol, use Razor Wind and get them out of my sight!"

    Drew's Absol wound back its head in preparation for an attack, but Jessie simply smiled and waved her finger towards the young coordinator in reply.

    "Now now now my young twerp," she chuckled, "you shouldn't talk that way to genius masterminds like Team Rocket!"

    "I'll talk to you however I want!" Drew retorted. "Absol, do it!"

    Jessie looked remarkably unfazed by this and both Ash and Brock frowned a little, curious of what gave the woman such unusual confidence.

    "Then we'll just have to shut you up!" she growled, producing a Pokeball from her belt and hurling it towards the Absol.

    The ball dramatically spun in the air and Ash, Brock and May all expected to see the familiar sight of Jessie's snake-like Pokemon, Seviper, to be revealed from its confines. So it was all the more surprising when the light faded to reveal a towering Pokemon which stood on two legs and was covered in grey, armour-like plates of rock. The creature eyed the Absol which stood before it angrily and everyone gasped as it let out a tremendous roar which shook the very air inside the carnival's tent. Almost immediately a huge gust of wind passed through the area and the dust on the ground where the tent was pitched began flying into the air in a vicious, miniature sandstorm, causing the spectators to shield their eyes.

    "That's impossible!" Brock cried, watching as the creature smashed its spiky tail into the ground in anticipation of the upcoming fight. "How on earth did Jessie manage to get her hands on a Tyranitar!?"

    Even Drew felt his heart beat a little faster as he looked into the eyes of the colossal creature which rose above him as if like a skyscraper. Drew had never come face-to-face with a Pokemon as powerful as a Tyranitar before and he instantly knew that his Absol would be no match for it.

    Absol remained motionless, as if the Tyranitar's gaze had frozen it to the spot and it was powerless to move even a single muscle. The Dark-type Pokemon turned and glanced towards its trainer for a look of reassurance but received nothing of the sort.

    "What are you waiting for!?" Drew growled. "Switch to Water Pulse and take that thing down!"

    Sand continued to whip through the air like a blanket of needles which stung the faces of the competitors as they did their best to shield themselves from harm. Finally Absol began to summon the courage to attack the towering monstrosity that was thundering towards it, a wave of crystal-blue water gushing from its horn and plowing into the Tyranitar who seemed rather bemused by the creature's actions.

    "Okay, Blaziken!" May yelled over the roar of the sandstorm that was crashing through the tent. "Use Sky Uppercut on that thing! If this sandstorm doesn't calm down the entire tent will be torn to pieces!"

    "Blaziken!" May's Pokemon agreed, dashing towards the Tyranitar from behind and readying its fist for the strike.

    "That doesn't sound fair to me!" James chuckled, removing another Pokeball from his jacket and tossing it towards the oncoming Blaziken.

    Blaziken stopped and shielded its eyes from the blinding light of the capsule which slowly receded, revealing an enormous, metal Pokemon with four blue arms and a gigantic, steel cross that marked its head. The creature glared down at the Fire-type Pokemon with apathetic crimson eyes as it opened its gaping maw in a display of its undoubtedly terrifying power.

    "Metagross!?" Brock gasped in amazement at the titanic figure of the spider-like creature that was raising its steel claw menacingly towards May's Blaziken. "Where did Team Rocket get these Pokemon!?"

    "Metagross," James began confidently, "use your Hyper Beam on that pathetic Blaziken."

    "Yeah!" Meowth added excitedly. "Once these twerps are outta the way we can begin stealing all these other chumps' Pokemon!"

    "Who said quality's better than quantity, right?" Jessie laughed, pointing her finger towards Drew's Absol. "Tyranitar, take down that sniveling excuse for a Pokemon!"

    Both of Team Rocket's new-found Pokemon let out an ear-splitting roar that rocked the tent. By now many of the audience members had begun to flee and those who hadn't were taking cover amongst the stands, hoping to avoid any injuries from the rampaging battle that was taking place in the centre of the hall. Slowly Metagross began charging its powerful Hyper Beam, the cross on its forehead glowing red-hot before firing directly towards May's cautious Blaziken. The orange beam tore through the sandstorm that continued to rage throughout the area like a torrent of water crashing against a rocky cliffside, sending dust and debris in its explosive wake. Blaziken narrowly dodged the attack, rolling to the side as a flash of yellow lightning illuminated the stage and struck the Metagross head-on.

    May looked up from shielding her eyes to see Ash and his Pikachu standing just a few feet in front of her, staring towards Team Rocket and their angry Pokemon. Sparks were wildly flying from Pikachu's cheeks and it glared right back at Metagross, unswayed by the extreme difference in size between the two of them.

    "Ash!" May called out, rushing to his side and grabbing his arm worriedly. Ash made no resistance as he felt the girl's hands run over his shoulder and pull him closer to her. Ash responded by wrapping his arms around his friend, doing his best to shield her from the unending sandstorm whilst continuing to command Pikachu in battle as efficiently as he could.

    "Are you okay, May?" he whispered, causing her to look up and straight into his dark eyes. She paused for a moment, her fingers gently playing with the fabric of his shirt before answering.

    "Yeah."

    Ash smiled warmly at the girl, relieved by this answer as he returned his attentions to the battle at hand.

    "Pikachu!" he ordered. "Use Thunderbolt on Metagross one more time!"

    "Pika!" Pikachu cried, its entire body engulfing itself in electricity which was launched straight towards the Steel-type Pokemon, whose bulky frame made dodging such a fast attack an impossibility. Instead Metagross flinched, closing its dark, red eyes as the lightning unfailingly struck the smooth, metal surface of the creature, shocking it to its core.

    "Some twerps just don't know when they're beat!" Meowth cursed, climbing up onto Wobbuffet's head in order to get a better view of the action.

    "Wobbuffet!" Wobbuffet agreed, slapping its head and sending the feline Pokemon tumbling back down to the ground.

    Soon Brock and Paul had also joined the fray and were standing near to Ash and May, Pokeballs at the ready. Jessie and James both smiled, their confidence in their new Pokemon completely unshakeable.

    "Now after so many years of failure we'll finally have our success!" Jessie screeched. "Now, Tyranitar! Get rid of these pathetic pests so we can start our Pokemon plundering!"

    Tyranitar roared once again and charged straight towards Drew's Absol, whilst Metagross made a lunge for Ash's Pikachu. The Pokemon clashed in the centre of the stage and soon the battle was well under way.

    ~*~*~

    Stars blanketed the night sky and lit the eery gloom that veiled the tranquil Eterna valley. The air was chilly and a man in a dark-brown trench-coat shivered, rubbing his face against the collar of his jacket in an effort to avoid the cold.

    Suddenly the wind picked up and the man glanced away from the shadows to where a small group of three were pushing a wheeled cart up the nearby hill. Quickly and stealthily the stranger hurried over to a nearby collection of shrubs to get a closer look at the trio. On closer inspection the group actually consisted of two humans and one Pokemon; a Shiftry to be precise. Several complaints could be heard from the male of the group, who possessed short, jade-green hair and a very deep voice.

    "I don't see why I'm the one who has to do all the pushing!" Butch panted, slowly shoving the cart filled with Pokeballs towards their destination.

    "Quit your complaining." Cassidy replied, idly making shadow puppets in the moonlight as she walked alongside the man and their Pokemon escort. "Someone's got to do the manual labour around here."

    Suddenly a loud explosion rocked the valley, startling all three of the group, who turned towards the source of the noise. In the distance they could see the contest tent of the carnival and several coloured beams of light firing up into the sky.

    "Wh-what was that?" Butch stammered uneasily.

    "Looks like those two stooges played right into our hands." Cassidy snickered. "That was a Metagross' Hyper Beam attack."

    Butch looked over to Cassidy in astonishment.

    "You mean those morons actually went and used the Pokemon the boss gave us?" he asked.

    Cassidy nodded her confirmation.

    "They really did make the perfect decoys." she laughed. "And now we have a clear path straight to the chopper. Come on, let's go! I want to get this mission over and done with already."

    "Sorry, but I can't let you people leave here just yet." a voice came from the undergrowth nearby, causing the group to jump in surprise.

    "Who's there!?" Cassidy demanded. She didn't have to wait long for an answer.

    Idly the stranger stepped out into the moonlight, unbuttoning the long, brown jacket he wore to reveal his belt and six Pokeballs attached to it. His bright-red afro was easily his most striking feature, though he also wore an equally colourful yellow shirt as well as a pair of more understated black jeans and white sneakers. Cassidy gasped, immediately recognising the man.

    "I know you!" she managed, backing away from the man a little. "You... You're..."

    "The name's Flint." the man replied calmly, removing a Pokeball from his belt and readying it in his hand. "Flint of the Sinnoh Elite Four. And you two are out of luck this time."

    Flint swiftly threw down his choice of Pokeball, casting a flash of light on the darkened hillside which slowly shifted into the form of a tall, slender monkey; fire sprouting from its hair like an enormous mane. The creature punched its fists together and glared menacingly at the trio standing before it, readying itself for combat as it had done so many times before in the service of its powerful trainer.

    "Now are you going to surrender those Pokeballs quietly," Flint began, "or is my Infernape going to have to beat them out of you?"

    "Shif." Nico's Shiftry spoke up, making its way to the front of the group and standing directly opposite the Fire-type Pokemon, waving its leaf-covered hands defiantly. Shiftry knew that it was at a huge disadvantage in terms of type, but its trainer had never let such small facts stand in their way of victory before.

    Flint's Infernape seemed to admire the creature's determination, raising an eyebrow and glancing back towards its trainer for confirmation to begin the battle. Flint smiled knowingly towards his partner and finally nodded before returning his attentions to Team Rocket.

    "Don't say I didn't warn you." he sighed. "Infernape! Use Mach Punch on that Shiftry!"

    In a flash of cinders Flint's Infernape darted across the hill and slammed its fist straight into Shiftry's gut. The Dark-type Pokemon gasped for air for a moment, shocked mostly by the sheer speed of its opponent's attack. The creature had no time to recover, however, as the Infernape's next attack was already well underway.

    "Now launch into Flare Blitz!" Flint cried.

    "Inferr!" the Fire-type Pokemon screeched its battlecry, its entire body quickly igniting before it launched itself straight into Shiftry again, this time forcing the creature to the floor in exhaustion.

    "Now, where were we?" Flint chuckled, stepping towards the now-unguarded pair of Team Rocket agents and making his way past the unconscious Shiftry. He paused for a moment, playfully scratching his chin before resuming his speech. "Ah, that's right! You were about to surrender, I think?"

    "Fat chance, circus-boy!" Cassidy snapped back, snatching a Pokeball from her belt and hurriedly releasing the Pokemon that lay waiting inside.

    The star-veiled hill was once again lit up by the flash of an opened Pokeball and soon the titanic image of an enormous, dark-blue Pokemon towered above the group of humans. It possessed a vaguely humanoid appearance, with rough, navy skin and large, sharp wings that protruded like spikes from its elbows. Its hands and feet were endowed with razor-like talons that seemed to extend like daggers from its body, and its huge, gaping maw was lined with teeth that made swords look blunt by comparison. Flint looked up into the creature's large, red eyes and smiled to himself, quietly shifting his hands back into his pockets.

    "Well well well," he laughed, "I gotta admit I never expected you to have a Garchomp on your team, that's for sure."

    Flint cast a quick glance towards his Infernape, who stepped away slightly, sensing the sheer power of its new opponent.

    "You ready for another round, old pal?" its trainer asked.

    "Ferrr!" the creature barked in reply, sending a torrent of embers up into the night sky in a show of both power and confidence. Cassidy's Garchomp watched the display angrily and simply snorted back in response.

    "Infernape, Mach Punch!" Flint commanded.

    "Garchomp, use Dragon Claw!" Cassidy countered.

    The two Pokemon then proceeded to furiously clash against one another beneath the moonlight, illuminating the hillside for miles around.

    ~*~*~

    "Chu!!" Pikachu cried, enormous bolts of lightning crashing down into the steel titan beneath it.

    Pikachu lightly landed on its feet and dashed away from an oncoming steel claw which split the stage asunder. Ash watched the scene with careful consideration, clenching his fists anxiously. Normally he wouldn't have been worried about Team Rocket, but this time he knew that they posed a considerable threat and there was something too precious in this room to risk idleness.

    Ash glanced to his right, where May still stood close to him, occasionally reaching up to touch his arm when both Blaziken and Pikachu appeared to be in trouble. It was strange just how calm he felt whenever he saw her, and for a moment he felt as if they were the only ones in the room, despite the chaos that was tearing the tent apart. Ash resolved to spend some quality time together with the girl after this was all over; it had been far too long since they'd been alone.

    "You twerps don't know when you're beat, do you?" Jessie snarled. "Metagross, keep using your Hyper Beam!"

    The gigantic Steel-type Pokemon roared angrily and fired yet another brightly coloured beam through the tent, tearing up the stands and sending shards of wood and plastic flying through the air. Ash gritted his teeth and felt May's hands grip him even tighter than before. Fortunately most of the spectators had fled in the chaos and should have by now been well away from the proximity of the tent.

    "No way are we giving up that easily!" Ash cried over the screams of the sandstorm that continued to blow through the area like a relentless hurricane of debris. "Right, Pikachu?"

    "Pika!" Pikachu agreed.

    "Pikachu, Volt Tackle!" Ash commanded.

    "Pika!" Pikachu replied, dashing straight towards Jessie's Metagross and enveloping itself in a golden light which caused its features to blur and its paws to leave a brief imprint of sparks where they touched the ground. "PikapikapikaPI-KA!"

    Metagross was knocked back several feet by the tiny creature's deceptively ferocious attack, causing Jessie to jump slightly and avoid the metal Pokemon and the sparks that were bouncing off its smooth, blue surface. Metagross dug its claws deep into the floor of the stage, its eyes almost burning with a luminous, red glare as it stepped forward once again and prepared another attack.

    "Watch it, you big oaf!" Jessie cursed, shaking her fist angrily at the Steel-type Pokemon which glanced back at her curiously. "Are you trying to flatten me!?"

    Metagross' heavy, enraged breathing could be heard even amongst the din of the sandstorm that continued to swirl around the group, and soon the creature had rotated one-hundred-and-eighty degrees in order to face its temporary trainer. Jessie immediately began to stop her yelling and her face took on a very concerned expression as the Pokemon's shadow slowly creeped over her body, leaving her feeling very small and insecure.

    "Um, I mean..." Jessie began nervously. "I mean, um... Try your best Metagross! You can beat that Pikachu!"

    Jessie chuckled nervously, continuing to step away from the creature which followed her with large, loud strides.

    "Um, you guys?" the woman called over towards James and Meowth, who were both focused on Tyranitar's battle against Drew's Absol and Paul's Elekid. "I think we have some trouble..."

    "What is it now, Jess-" James began, but his voice quickly faded when he saw the gigantic Steel-type Pokemon making its way towards them with an enraged look in its eyes.

    "Well don't just stand there, Wobbuffet!" Jessie cried, suddenly grabbing her Psychic-type Pokemon by the head and shoving it in front of Metagross before cowering behind its soft, blue frame. "Use your Counter move or whatever it is you do!"

    "Wobbuh?" Wobbuffet replied, clearly confused by what was going on. It was tough being a member of Team Rocket.

    "I'm not sure that's gonna help us too much, Jessie!" Meowth exclaimed, leaping onto James' head as Metagross began to form a small ball of energy from its gaping mouth.

    "Wobbuh Wobb!!" Wobbuffet agreed, slapping its head nervously.

    "Then..." Jessie stammered, holding on tightly to Wobbuffet from behind. "Then that means we're..."

    Finally Metagross' attack was complete and the ball of energy swiftly turned into a ferocious beam of light which plowed straight into the earth below Team Rocket and sent them flying up through one of the many newly-formed holes in the carnival tent's roof.

    "We're blasting off again!!" Jessie, James and Meowth all screamed in unison as they were flung up high into the night sky.

    "Wobbuffet!!" their blue Pokemon's voice could be heard agreeing in the distance until finally they were beyond the horizon and out of earshot.

    There was a loud roar of pain from the other side of the tent and Team Rocket's Tyranitar turned to face Metagross, its demeanour just as angry as its former partner's.

    "Pika?" Pikachu squeaked, retreating back to the relative safety of where its trainer and his friend stood, May's Blaziken following swiftly behind.

    "Hey, what just happened?" Ash asked to no-one in particular. "Why's Tyranitar mad at Metagross all of a sudden?"

    "Ash! May!" Brock's voice could be heard in the distance and soon the young breeder could be seen dashing over to the two trainers, a very concerned look painted on his face. "Tyranitar caught part of that Metagross' Hyper Beam! It thinks that Metagross wants to pick a fight!"

    Both Ash and May gasped in horror upon hearing this news and the girl's grip naturally tightened on the boy's arm.

    "But if those two Pokemon fight," May said, "then they'll just put everyone in even more danger!"

    "Right!" Brock nodded somberly after replying. "We've got to stop them somehow!"

    Pikachu leapt back down from Ash's shoulder, clearly eager to separate the two Pokemon and keep the people nearby safe from harm. The small rodent looked up towards its trainer and the two seemed to silently come to some agreement.

    The moment was interrupted by a flash of sparks and another wave of water which crashed over Tyranitar in the distance. The angry dinosaur-like creature let out an ear-splitting roar in response, thrashing its tail and sending Drew's Absol flying into the wall of the tent. The sandstorm also seemed to be matching its creator's mood by growing increasingly thick and violent, and it soon became difficult to see even a few metres away from one's face.

    Ash, May and Brock made their way to the other side of the main hall as quickly as they could, Pikachu and Blaziken following close behind. By the time they had arrived Absol was back opposite Tyranitar, trying its best to avoid the enraged creature's powerful strikes and serve its master as faithfully as it could.

    "Good of you to make it." Paul remarked snidely to Ash, who frowned and raised his fists.

    "Hey, we were working on Metagross!" Ash protested.

    "Whatever." Paul replied as cockily as ever. "You and your Pikachu can just go home if you want and let the real trainers take care of business."

    "Oh yeah?" Ash growled. "Pikachu, Volt Tackle, let's go!"

    Once again Pikachu launched towards its opponent with a powerful Volt Tackle. The Pokemon crashed directly into Tyranitar's armour-plated stomach and caused the creature to roar in anger once more. Tyranitar swung its arms wildly in an attempt to catch the Electric-type, but Pikachu was too fast and simply leapt away with its usual elegance and grace, waiting for its trainer to call the next move.

    Paul kept one eye on the enemy, occasionally scanning the main hall for any signs of Nico, though the increasingly rough sandstorm was making this task a particularly difficult one. If there was one thing Paul always liked it was the luxury of being in control.

    And right now, that was a luxury he didn't have.

    ~*~*~

    The sound of Flint's Infernape panting heavily could be heard across the hillside as the creature crouched low to the ground, anticipating another strike. In the air above the Pokemon flew the two large Dragon-type Pokemon that it had been battling all this time. One was the Garchomp which Cassidy was controlling, whilst the other was commanded by Butch.

    Butch's Pokemon was also blue, though its skin was a far lighter shade than its partner and its body a lot less streamlined. It possessed four large legs, each equipped with vicious talons and two huge, red, leathery wings that glided on the air above without effort. Its head sported several large, spiky protrusions in perfect symmetry with one another and on the end of its body it possessed a long, powerful tail which underlined its status as a powerful dragon Pokemon.

    "Keep your guard up, Infernape!" Flint urged his Pokemon on, a trail of sweat rolling down the side of his head. It had been a tough battle so far, more-so due to the fact that it was a two-on-one fight and Infernape had had little opportunity to counter with Team Rocket's hit-and-run tactics.

    "Garchomp, dive down and use Dig!" Cassidy commanded.

    There was a slight pause for a moment and the hillside became silent once more. Suddenly Garchomp let out an ear-splitting screech before diving down, slamming into the earth and burrowing deep underground like a Seaking proudly crashing into the ocean waves. Flint gritted his teeth nervously and removed his hands from his pockets, spreading them out to the side in an effort to retain his balance as the ground beneath his feet vibrated like a miniature earthquake.

    This was bad: the hillside was almost completely pitch black, save for the illuminating flames of Infernape's ruffled fur. The ground underneath them continued to rumble ominously as Garchomp prowled deep beneath the hillside, waiting for the exact moment to strike. Flint knew that Infernape was exhausted and the lack of usable light in the area made fighting almost an impossibility. Garchomp, with its nocturnal vision, however, suffered no ill consequences from the situation.

    "In!" Infernape yelped, feeling a strong grip suddenly pull at its ankle and yank it down to the ground. "Infernape!!"

    "Infernape, no!" Flint called out in worry, watching bitterly as Garchomp's hands emerged from below the ground and latched onto Infernape's legs as tight as they could.

    "Now, Butch!" Cassidy urged her partner, who hesitated for a moment before commanding his own Pokemon.

    "Right!" he finally exclaimed. "Salamence, use Fly on that Infernape!"

    Salamence's shrill cry shook the wind before the dragon dived down eagerly, its razor-sharp wings glistening in the moonlight as the creature flew closer and closer and closer until finally it slashed down against its victim's chest, causing Infernape to cry out in pain. Flint flinched as he watched his Pokemon topple down to the ground unconscious, dark-crimson blood spraying into the air like a morbid fountain.

    "Infernape, no!" Flint cried, rushing over to where his Pokemon lay and kneeling beside it, cradling it in his arms. He had expected Team Rocket to fight dirty, but he had never expected them to use such excessive force in a battle. "Don't worry, pal! You're gonna be okay!"

    The laughter of Butch and Cassidy caught the man's attention and Flint looked up, the smiles of the Team Rocket agents causing him to overflow with anger. He kept his composure, however, and remained by his Pokemon's side, quickly fumbling in his jacket for some bandages and emergency supplies. A few yards away the sound of churning soil could be heard as Team Rocket's Garchomp flew up out of the earth and landed beside its owners, still glaring at its unconscious opponent.

    "Let that be a lesson to you not to get in Team Rocket's way." Cassidy mocked the man, returning to the cart of Pokeballs and helping Butch to push them up the hill towards their destination.

    Butch glanced over towards the unconscious body of Nico's Shiftry, the leaves on its body rustling in the late-evening breeze. He then proceeded to turn to back to Cassidy, who was frowning at him.

    "What are you waiting for?" she asked, tapping her foot as she spoke. "Let's go! We've got to finish this mission!"

    "But..." Butch stammered. "What about the kid's Shiftry?"

    Cassidy shot a glare at her partner which spoke louder than words could ever hope to speak.

    "Are you kidding me?" she replied. "Who cares? We've got to get to the rendezvous point right now!"

    Butch paused and considered his partner's words for a moment. Cassidy had always been a good partner; yes, she was tough on him at times, but he never felt unappreciated at all. Truth be told, she made the job more exciting and enjoyable, and he would never question her authority. She gave orders and he followed them, and that was just the way Butch liked it to be.

    "Right." he agreed, gripping the handle of the cart and helping her to continue pushing it up the hill.

    As they made their way towards the rendezvous point, Butch couldn't help but glance back over his shoulder to where Nico's Shiftry continued to lie, unconscious and alone.
    Last edited by Gazmof; 6th July 2008 at 12:42 PM.
    Good Love Charm
    *COMPLETE*

  12. #87
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    837

    Default

    Chapter was too big, so I had to split it into two posts. Here's part two:

    Chapter Nine:
    May vs Drew? Decisive Battle!!
    (Part Two)

    Nico continued to watch the battle unfold from the shadows of the darkened corridors just beyond the tent's main hall. The young trainer had been viewing the proceedings for quite some time, though Tyranitar's sandstorm had grown increasingly vicious and it was difficult to see anything at all now. All this time his eyes had been firmly set on one target: May Maple.

    Nico shielded his eyes as the sandstorm kicked another stray blast of dust towards his face. This was an unexpected event, though he was more than happy to welcome it. Nico had always been a big believer in working with what you were given and today was no different - the only question was how would he separate the girl from her friends during their time of need? Though he hadn't known her for long, what Nico did know about her was more than enough to orchestrate a convincing plan. May was a particularly old-fashioned girl in Nico's view; always hoping to help her friends and putting her Pokemon before herself. She was so innocent it was almost as if she had walked straight out of the pages of a fairy-tale - perhaps that was why he was so fascinated by the coordinator.

    Familiar voices from slightly farther down the corridor prompted Nico to shuffle back into the safety of the shadows. From the corner of his eye he could see Officer Kendrick escorting his daughter Alisa and the carnival's Nurse Joy. Though he was normally not the kind of man to get flustered, Nico found it interesting that Kendrick appeared to be in quite a hurry.

    "But Dad!" Nico could hear Alisa protesting as the man pulled her along with a tight grip on her wrist. "What about the spectators? And May and Drew? We can't just leave them here!"

    "I already told you that Nico is handling the evacuation!" Kendrick lied, refusing to look back as he continued to lead the way out of the tent. "Now hurry! It's dangerous here, Alisa, and we've got to get you out of here!"

    Nico's face continued to wear his blank expression as he heard the group's voices fade and disappear in the distance. Breathing a slight sigh of relief he returned his attentions to the main hall, where another burst of electricity could be seen behind the veil of sand that continued to engulf the entire area like a swarm of Combee to a honey-pot.

    "Blaziken, use Blaze Kick, now!" May's voice could be heard giving orders just a few yards away, swiftly followed by a flash of fire that was quickly swallowed up by the debris of the sandstorm.

    It was now or never.

    Nico took a deep breath before dashing straight into the chaos of the main hall, where he soon found Ash, May and Brock nearby, their Pokemon continuing to do their best to keep the angry Tyranitar and Metagross at bay. His arrival startled the three trainers slightly, but they were undoubtedly happy to see him.

    "Nico!" May exclaimed, shielding her eyes from the sandstorm which continued to plague them. "What are you doing here?"

    Nico panting loudly, doing his best to pretend to be exhausted.

    "I came to get you, May!" he explained. "We've taken your Pokemon to a safe place, but I need you to come with me to get them!"

    "But we've got to stop these Pokemon first!" May disagreed, another blast of fire erupting from nearby and the metallic roar of an angry Metagross chilling the air by several degrees.

    "There's no time for that!" Nico insisted. "I've already evacuated everyone else; you guys are the only ones left! It's dangerous here!"

    "But if we just leave," Ash began, "then these Pokemon will just follow us and put everyone in danger again."

    "Right." Nico nodded. "That's why I need you to stay here and distract them while May and I go get help."

    Ash, Brock and May all considered this for a moment. It was true that they were fighting a losing battle and the sandstorm was showing no signs of abating. May glanced towards Ash, then to Brock, and back to Ash again. The sound of Paul's Elekid launching another Thunderpunch could be heard in the distance, as well as the echo of another Water Pulse from Drew's Absol flooding the battlefield, causing Brock to finally speak up.

    "May, you and Ash should go." he suggested. "Drew, Paul and I can stay here and keep these two at bay."

    "But Brock!" Ash cried. "There's no way your Pokemon can take on Metagross and Tyranitar by themselves!"

    Ash scratched his chin for a moment as he considered their options before coming to a realisation.

    "I know!" he exclaimed. "Pikachu!"

    "Pika?" the electric rodent came bounding through the cyclone of sand upon hearing its trainer call out its name.

    "I need you to stay here and hold the line while me and May go to get her other Pokemon." Ash explained. "Are you up for it, buddy?"

    "Pika!" Pikachu squeaked in determination. "Pikachu Pika!"

    "In that case, then Blaziken will stay and help out, too." May declared. "Right, Blaziken?"

    "Blaziken!" May's Pokemon replied, leaping back into the fray along with Ash's Pikachu.

    Nico watched the two Pokemon closely before they vanished amidst the sandstorm yet again. It wasn't perfect, but he could work with this.

    "Alright." he said blankly. "Then it's settled. Let's go, you guys."

    Nico paused for a moment, reaching into the inside pocket of his jacket where a lone Pokeball was sitting, waiting to be removed.

    "Oh, that's right. Before I forget," Nico spoke to Brock, handing him the Pokeball, "give this to Paul."

    Brock looked down at the small device in his palm, clearly puzzled.

    "What's this for?" he asked, eying Nico curiously. The young trainer simply smiled at Brock's confused frown.

    "I'm a man of my word." Nico replied, then turned to lead Ash and May to the exit of the main hall. "Let's go!"

    Without any hesitation both Ash and May followed the young trainer into the shadowy hallways of the carnival tent, where May's Pokemon were waiting.

    ~*~*~

    Stars twinkled in the navy-blue sky, the yellow moon peering out over the mountains which bordered the Eterna Valley's eastern perimeter. The night air was as chilly as ever and the crowd of former spectators to the carnival's Pokemon contest continued to stand well away from the tent where the battling Metagross and Tyranitar were still rampaging out of control. Nervous glances were exchanged and hushed chatter abounded amongst the people until finally a loud, commanding voice silenced the uneasy murmurs.

    "Alright people, listen up!" a woman with dark-green hair announced, clapping her hands with authority.

    The crowd of people all turned and breathed a collective sigh of relief upon recognising the woman. She wore a plain, blue cap and a matching police uniform. Around her neck was a whistle that dangled from a silver chain and on her breast there was a neatly-polished gold badge proudly displaying her name: Officer Jenny.

    "I'm the officer in charge of this investigation!" the woman explained. "Please keep your distance from that tent and line up in single-file in front of my colleague here!"

    Officer Jenny proceeded to wave towards a sheepish-looking young policeman with a pen and notepad at the ready.

    "Now, who is in charge of this carnival?" she continued, her eyes scanning over the crowd with a quizzical look.

    "I am." came a confident reply from amongst the gathered spectators. The crowd quickly parted like a group of trained soldiers at the sound of the man's powerful and commanding voice and the top-hatted Kendrick made his way to where Officer Jenny was standing.

    Jenny briefly eyed the man who smiled confidently back at her. She frowned a little at the man's display of what she believed to be arrogance, and so she quickly took the metal handcuffs that were strapped to the side of her belt, firmly snapping them over Kendrick's wrists.

    "Then I am hereby placing you under arrest, sir!" she declared. The crowd of spectators gasped at this announcement, but Kendrick remained calm, his smug smile firmly painted on his face.

    "Oh?" Kendrick bluffed. "And on what charges, may I ask?"

    Officer Jenny scowled at the man, her jade-green eyes conveying exactly how much she distrusted him and she had to stop herself from squeezing the handcuffs tightly against his skin.

    "Pokemon theft." she replied bluntly, her scowl showing no signs of receding anytime soon as she continued to glare into Kendrick's uncaring eyes.

    Another gasp filled the air and hushed voices began to whisper and murmur once more from just a few feet away from the officer and her suspect.

    "That's impossible!" Kendrick's daughter Alisa yelled, making her way to the front of the crowd and staring at the policewoman in disbelief. "My father would never do anything like that!"

    "Yes, she's right!" Nurse Joy added, standing beside Alisa and placing her hand gently on the girl's shoulder, a look of utmost concern on her face. "I've worked at this carnival for many years and Mister Kendrick would never do anything untoward!"

    "Sorry, but I have very persuasive evidence that suggests otherwise!" Officer Jenny responded, her gaze now shifting from the suspect to his supporters.

    "Oh?" Kendrick chuckled, clearly amused by the whole scenario. "Then perhaps you'd be so kind as to share some of this..." He paused as he considered the word carefully, "'evidence' with us?"

    "I'm here with a member of the Sinnoh Elite Four who has received several testimonies about the real nature of this carnival from respected authorities of other regions!" Jenny snapped at the man. "Whatever you're trying to pull, you won't get away with it he-"

    Officer Jenny's speech was interrupted by yet another beam of light emerging from the contest tent and escaping up into the night sky. Another powerful roar could be heard from within the confines of the temporary building and the collected group people once again gasped in horror at the display.

    "Whatever case you may have against me," Kendrick stated coldly, "I suggest you leave it for another time. There are children in that tent and they're in grave danger from rampaging Pokemon! Are you really going to stand out here and arrest me when children's lives are at stake!?"

    Officer Jenny remained silent at this remark, glaring angrily into Kendrick's eyes.

    "If that's the kind of justice you promote," the man continued, his lips forming into a crooked smile, "then I feel sorry for the citizens you claim to 'protect'."

    Jenny paused at this comment, contemplating her options for a moment. With a growl in her throat she eventually came to her conclusion.

    "Secure the perimeter of that tent." she ordered her colleagues who sprung into action, doing her best to avoid Kendrick's smug grin. "Ensuring the people's safety is our top priority..."

    ~*~*~

    Heavy breathing filled the night air as three shadows raced up the steep hillside towards their destination. Ash and May had been following Nico through shrubbery and overgrowth for what seemed like almost half-an-hour and the frantic pace was beginning to get to them.

    Nico had explained to them on their departure from the rear-most exit of the contest tent that May's Pokemon, as well as those of all the coordinators who had been competing in the event, had been stored outside of the carnival grounds for security purposes. During the rush of excitement and adrenaline May had forgotten to enquire about Drew's Pokemon, though as she considered this she assumed that it would probably make more sense for her to collect both of the coordinator's Pokemon whilst he, Paul and Brock attempted to hold the rampaging Metagross and Tyranitar at bay.

    "Hey you guys," May managed, the strenuous pace of running finally catching up to her as she stopped and took deep breaths, "wait up, will you?"

    "Are you okay, May?" Ash asked, wandering back over to where May was standing and stooping down so they were both at eye-level.

    "We don't have time to hang around and catch our breath!" Nico insisted, turning back and looking up towards the top of hill, where the moon was casting its silver gaze from above. "We're almost there. Come on!"

    "Nico's right, May." Ash agreed, extending his hand to the girl who smiled up at him for a moment. He looked so handsome under the moonlight, and for a brief moment she imagined how he would look in a ballroom tuxedo, asking her for the final dance of the night.

    'Ash...' she thought to herself, taking the hand of her best friend and allowing him to lead her up the hillside where Nico had already resumed his walk.

    The entire valley was now well and truly blanketed by the darkness of the night sky and it was becoming impossible to identify large rocks and weeds in the ground, causing the three trainers to stumble every so often. As a result of this natural obstacle course Ash instinctively found himself shuffling closer to May, his hands gripping hers tightly as he lead her up to the top of the hillside which was now slowly coming into view.

    "We're here." Nico announced, bounding up to the clearing at the top of the hill where borth Ash and May were surprised to see a large chinook helicopter waiting for them. The cargo bay of the aircraft was open and inside was a large cart on wheels that had been locked into position.

    Ash carefully guided May up to the clearing, eventually breaking their hand contact as he did so. May frowned a little at this and continued to stare at her hand for a moment, as if she felt somewhat empty from this sudden separation, even though their hands had only been together for a few minutes.

    Nico made his way up to vehicle's cargo bay, his hand parting through the sea of Pokeballs that were stored in the cart until he finally picked out five. He waved towards his two companions and both Ash and May wandered over to the boy in response.

    "Here you go, May." he offered, passing the girl the five Pokeballs which she gratefully placed into her fanny pack.

    "Great!" she replied excitedly. "Thanks, Nico! Now let's grab Drew's Pokemon and get back down to the tent. We've got to help the others!"

    Ash nodded to the girl, turning and preparing to lead the way back down the hillside when Nico's voice stopped him.

    "I'm afraid we can't do that." Nico began, folding his arms and dropping down to the ground beside May, who looked at him for a moment, puzzled.

    "What?" she replied uncertainly. "What do you mean, Nico? You said that-"

    "May, you need to come with me." Nico said, forcefully taking a hold of May's wrist and pulling the startled girl towards him.

    "Hey!" Ash reacted instantly, dashing over to where the two were struggling. "What do you think you're doing, Nico!?"

    "Rockets!" Nico yelled as he did his best to hold May back. "I could use some help here!"

    The sound of the vehicle's cockpit doors sliding open echoed across the clearing and soon two shadowy figures were standing beside Nico and May.

    "What's going on?" the voice of Cassidy spoke up, when suddenly May's scream silenced her and the girl was flung into the Team Rocket agent's arms.

    "Throw her in the cargo bay!" Nico ordered as he removed a Pokeball from his belt and threw it towards Ash.

    Ash screeched to a halt and shielded his eyes from the blinding light of Nico's Pokeball whilst Butch and Cassidy did as they were told. The white illumination gradually receded and in its place hovered a large, purple-coloured Pokemon measuring just under four feet tall, though its moth-like wings made it seem a foot or so larger. The insect lacked limbs of any description, instead featuring a bulbous body that was covered in a strange, dust-like material, several short, tendril-like claws protruding from just below its long, pointed head. It considered Ash with its large, rounded eyes for a moment, waiting patiently for its trainer's instructions.

    "Venomoth!" Nico called. "Confusion!"

    Nico's Pokemon made a slight buzzing noise, prompting its large eyes to shift in colour like a kaleidoscope.

    "Oh yeah?" Ash countered, removing a Pokeball from his own belt and throwing it down to the ground. "Turtwig, help me out!"

    Ash's Pokeball split into two halves before ejecting a beam of light which twisted its shape before finally revealing the form of Ash's chosen Grass-type Pokemon, Turtwig. The tiny green tortoise glared up at Nico's Venomoth with its defiant, yellow eyes, the small leaf that sprouted from its head swaying harshly as the wind began to pick up.

    "Turtwig, Razor Leaf!" Ash ordered.

    Turtwig whipped its head back and forth, loosing a stream of razor-sharp leaves which cut and slashed at Venomoth's wings, forcing the creature's attack to be cancelled and causing it to lose focus in its struggle to stay airborne.

    "We don't have time for this!" Nico cursed loudly, turning to face Cassidy. "Strap her down and start the engines! We've got to get out of here!"

    "You're not going anywhere!" Ash shouted, determination filling his voice completely. "Turtwig, Bite!"

    "Venomoth, Stun Spore on both of them!" Nico responded.

    Ash's Turtwig leapt towards its opponent head-first, opening its mouth in preparation for its attack. Nico's Venomoth was surprisingly agile, however, and with a quick flutter of its strangely beautiful, purple wings a vast torrent of powerful dust spores washed down over both Ash and his Pokemon, causing the two of them to fall to the ground in agony.

    "No!" Ash cried, doing his best to crawl closer to Nico, already his vision becoming blurry from the effects of Venomoth's powerful attack.

    "Ash!!" May called back, struggling against Butch as he shoved her into place in the helicopter's cargo hold. "Ash, no! Ash!!"

    "May, I'm coming!" Ash managed, struggling to get to his feet as pain coursed through his body, numbing all of his senses. "Hold on!"

    Nico smiled to himself, returning Venomoth into its Pokeball and turning his back on the boy by walking deeper into the cargo hold. The cargo door slowly began to close behind him and soon the aircraft's rotor blades were powering up, ready to lift them up high into the sky. Ash fumbled with the Pokeball in his hands, doing his best to recall Turtwig back into the safety of the device before getting to his feet and stumbling towards the helicopter.

    "May!" he gasped, his eyes darting across the rear of the vehicle in order to find any place he could stow away.

    He was in luck - fixed to both sides of the transport were what appeared to be emergency capsules, presumably used for jettisoning excess weight or delivering supplies. With his mind focused on only one thing, and with the helicopter beginning to lift up slowly into the air, Ash unclipped the two latches attached to the side of the pod and dove inside, tightly slamming the capsule shut behind him.

    It was cramped inside and Ash was by no means comfortable with the constant roar of the vehicle's powerful engines just a few feet above him. Such worries were trivial in his mind, however. All he could think of was one irreplaceable thing as the toxins of Venomoth's Stun Spore began to mercilessly lull the boy into a deep sleep.

    'May...' his thoughts echoed in his mind. 'I'm coming, May...'

    ~*~*~

    Review time!

    Quote Originally Posted by shadow_shipper View Post
    Well, besides that, killer battle, nice development (I really didn't see Nico being part of Kendrick's "family" though ^^') and can't wait to see what Nico wants with May...
    Funny; I'd been planning it for so long I'm kinda surprised that people are shocked by it, haha ^^;;

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    I forgot to mention that when I first read about Nico I thought he was just a one-time OC but then he became bigger and now look at him!!! I have to say I'm very pleased that you have Paul in your fic. It's simply not a sinnoh-setting fanfic without him =D
    Yeah, we all love Paul, don't we? ^_~

    Quote Originally Posted by Gaiash View Post
    I've noticed Maple is a common sername name for May to have in fanfics. Any idea how that started?
    No idea, I'm just going with the flow :p

    Quote Originally Posted by Ariel_Anderson View Post
    Yeah, I have. If you remember, I was the one who spotted Meyrin.
    But of course.

    Quote Originally Posted by buster_wolf View Post
    Great chapter as usual, and it totally blew my mind when Nico's true character unfolded. I also his new pokemon as well. : D

    Other things I liked about this chapter was May using a play from Ash's book. It was pretty awesome and I feel Ash would be the type to not take credit for it, he only does that for comical purposes mostly. ;P But yes, the details of the battle were as usual, very good as well as your original characters you develop like Nico and Kendrick.


    Also, you write Paul awesome. Period.
    Hehe, thanks :D And yes, Nico's team is awesome. Period. I gotta work on recreating it sometime.
    Good Love Charm
    *COMPLETE*

  13. #88
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    The Giant Mitten
    Posts
    4,506

    Default

    Since I've been lurking this for a while... >_> I figured I should start reviewing. <_< *somewhat lazy person*

    I'm gonna be honest - I usually have a hard time reading chaptered fanfiction that focus on pairings that I don't support. However, the way you portrayed Ash and May's relationship in this...I really like it a lot. I felt like I was watching an actual episode while reading this, and I don't feel that way about a lot of Shipping fanfiction that I read.

    Everyone is in character (well, I guess Drew is a bit meaner than I expected, but it works out given the situation), and I feel you did extremely well with Ash. You definitely kept the dense part of him in tact.

    Anyways, yeah. If you couldn't already tell, I really love this fic. Everyone has basically said what I wanted to say regarding the chapters, so I'll just wait for the next chapter to "really" review. :x

    EDIT: Okay, read the chapter, and...wow. That was super action packed, and not to mention, freaking awesome. Gah, Nico is...he bothers me. Though, that was probably your intention with him, lol. Geeze, Drew is being...something I probably shouldn't say here, though go May for fighting back. That was probably my favorite part of this chapter. Flint was a cool addition to the fic, too. I definitely wasn't expecting him. Poor May, though. ;_; I know Ash is on the way, so I'm not gonna worry so much. DREW WILL PAY FOR THOSE THINGS HE SAID ABOUT ASH. D: /lolAshfangirl

    Nah, Mark and I wouldn't do that...I think. ;P Can't wait for the next chapter!
    Last edited by Chelc; 6th July 2008 at 6:14 PM.
    Currently a little busy. I'll respond to all messages when I can.

  14. #89
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Unda da sea
    Posts
    4,599

    Default

    Well, this has been a good evening. First the absolutely AMAZING series finale of Doctor Who, and now a double-bill of one of my favourite fics!

    Alrighty, to reviewing {cracks knuckles}:

    Very nice chapter, as always. One slight niggle, on my part:

    May smiled as she thought of how far she had come. She wasn't the spoilt little girl who was stuck in Littleroot Town anymore.
    She's from Petalburg City. At least, in the anime. She lives in Littleroot in the game though, but I digest...

    I think that's the only negative bit I could find, so on with the main parts I liked:

    The young girl's heart leapt into her throat as she saw the boy with the lime-green hair stare blankly at her, his face completely void of anything that could even be remotely described as an expression. Drew's stare was yet another reminder of why May had made such a grievous mistake in her decision to date the successful Pokemon coordinator during her brief time in the Johto region.

    "Looks like you're through to the final." Drew stated coldly, his tone causing May to turn her head and walk past him defiantly.

    "Yeah, that's right." she answered just as bluntly as she made her way towards the far corner of the room where a collection of chairs were idly positioned. The young girl took a seat on one of them and began unzipping her fanny pack, then stopped when she noticed her rival's shadow creeping over her.
    Oooooooooohh, I can feel the tension! That sort of situation is always awkward. I've been sat with a friend, and her recently-made-ex has come into the room. The thermometer plunges.... Good way to write it.

    "I don't need it explained to me, Drew!" May responded. "I saw you with my own eyes! You two were all over each other! Do you really think that just giving me that same old smile is going to change the fact that you cheated on me?"
    Ah, anti-ContestShipping. Gotta love it. Anywho, this is good, as it gives us more backstory to what "happened" between them in Johto. But still, the question remains, who?

    Drew scowled at this response, steadying himself as he stood up as well and confronted the girl.

    "You belong to me, May!" he shouted back. "No-one else is allowed to touch you but me!"
    Possessive! Seriously Drew, let it go. You had your chance, now it's time for someone else....

    "Thanks, you guys!" May accepted the congratulations as modestly as she could. "And thanks for cheering for me, Ash."

    May smiled at the boy and gave him a sly wink.

    "But you know you don't have to keep jumping out of your seat every five minutes just for little old me."

    "Wha-!" Ash coughed, his face turning bright red as an intense blush took over him. "I wasn't, uh, I mean-"
    Ah, simple flirting. Nice of you to cram it in wherever possible. Good on you!

    "Ash..." he explained hesitantly. "Ash wanted me to tell you that, uh... That he wants to meet you in this room after the match is over. Alone."

    May blinked at the boy in confusion. Ash? What did Ash want to meet up with her for? And why did they have to be alone? Was it something that he couldn't talk about in front of Brock? May's mind began to wander through all the possibilities, excited at what her friend might want to tell her. Was he going to offer to travel with her? Was he going to invite her out for a celebratory dinner?

    A coy smile then crossed her lips.

    Could it be... He liked her?
    Awwww! Poor May. Having all these hopes and dreams regarding our hero, and they're all for naught.

    Or are they......?

    It was just Ash, wasn't it? May had nothing to be careful about when she was with her best friend; he was the one person she could be completely at ease with the most. May smiled to herself and approached the backstage exit of the waiting room, the chanting echos of the crowd rumbling just ahead of her. Looking down towards her fanny pack she undid the zipper and removed the small, pink ribbon from earlier, admiring it as she had done so many times in Johto when she had felt lost and alone.

    After taking a moment to look at the item lovingly she clipped it to the left breast of her jacket and placed her hands over her heart so she could check how securely she had attached it. Finally May took a deep breath and opened the door, her destination firmly set in her mind.

    She knew she couldn't lose. After all, she had him watching over her.

    Her good luck charm.
    Ribbon = Good! I think every AdvanceShipper on the planet loved the fact that the ribbon was brought up during May's return. Nice reference to the title as well! It's sweet that May trusts Ash that much, and that she feels he brings her that much luck.

    As the boy moved from out of the doorway his eyes caught a glimpse of the young girl who sat sobbing in the corner, her blue eyes glistening with tears. Nico watched her for a moment, a strange emotion welling up inside of him, but he paid it no heed. After all, he had more important things on his mind right now.
    You really hate Dawn, don'tcha? JK. This is an interesting change for me. Most AS fics I read have Dawn as a 'pusher' for Ash and May to get together, as she seems like that kinda girl. But in this one, she's pretty much indisposed....

    The smoke had now risen completely and the four figures could be seen standing proudly in the centre of the scorched stage. Two of them were humans: a woman with crimson hair and a man whose own was pastel-blue; both of them wore matching white uniforms with a bright red 'R' emblazoned on the chest. Their two smaller companions were Pokemon - a short, confident Meowth and a rather puzzled-looking Wobbuffet that was rubbing its head.

    "Team Rocket?" May gasped. "No way! Aren't they bored yet?"
    Nope! Wobba always looks puzzled, eh? Gotta love him though!

    The ball dramatically spun in the air and Ash, Brock and May all expected to see the familiar sight of Jessie's snake-like Pokemon, Seviper, to be revealed from its confines. So it was all the more surprising when the light faded to reveal a towering Pokemon which stood on two legs and was covered in grey, armour-like plates of rock. The creature eyed the Absol which stood before it angrily and everyone gasped as it let out a tremendous roar which shook the very air inside the carnival's tent. Almost immediately a huge gust of wind passed through the area and the dust on the ground where the tent was pitched began flying into the air in a vicious, miniature sandstorm, causing the spectators to shield their eyes.
    Well, that was a bit of a shock. Tyranitar really shakes things up, huh? This is a bit of an upgrade from the Charizard and Aggron that they (mistakenly) got a while back.

    "Ash!" May called out, rushing to his side and grabbing his arm worriedly. Ash made no resistance as he felt the girl's hands run over his shoulder and pull him closer to her. Ash responded by wrapping his arms around his friend, doing his best to shield her from the unending sandstorm whilst continuing to command Pikachu in battle as efficiently as he could.

    "Are you okay, May?" he whispered, causing her to look up and straight into his dark eyes. She paused for a moment, her fingers gently playing with the fabric of his shirt before answering.

    "Yeah."
    Time and a place guys...... Nice addition. Even in the midst of battle, they still feel that spark run between them.

    "The name's Flint." the man replied calmly, removing a Pokeball from his belt and readying it in his hand. "Flint of the Sinnoh Elite Four. And you two are out of luck this time."

    Flint swiftly threw down his choice of Pokeball, casting a flash of light on the darkened hillside which slowly shifted into the form of a tall, slender monkey; fire sprouting from its hair like an enormous mane. The creature punched its fists together and glared menacingly at the trio standing before it, readying itself for combat as it had done so many times before in the service of its powerful trainer.
    Nice choice. Infernape can do quite a bit of damage, as I've been finding out recently..... wait, sorry, this isn't the battle forum. Anyways, interesting choice to use Flint. I take it Aaron, Bertha and Lucian are in on this as well? (Prays for Cynthia to appear)

    "Watch it, you big oaf!" Jessie cursed, shaking her fist angrily at the Steel-type Pokemon which glanced back at her curiously. "Are you trying to flatten me!?"

    Metagross' heavy, enraged breathing could be heard even amongst the din of the sandstorm that continued to swirl around the group, and soon the creature had rotated one-hundred-and-eighty degrees in order to face its temporary trainer. Jessie immediately began to stop her yelling and her face took on a very concerned expression as the Pokemon's shadow slowly creeped over her body, leaving her feeling very small and insecure.
    Yeah...... don't piss off a Pseudo-Legendary if you know what's good for you. Leave it to TR to mess things up in the stupidest way possible...

    Salamence's shrill cry shook the wind before the dragon dived down eagerly, its razor-sharp wings glistening in the moonlight as the creature flew closer and closer and closer until finally it slashed down against its victim's chest, causing Infernape to cry out in pain. Flint flinched as he watched his Pokemon topple down to the ground unconscious, dark-crimson blood spraying into the air like a morbid fountain.
    Ouch. A little descriptive, don't you think? Anyways, it's still good. What's with TR getting all the Pseudo-Legendaries then? The only one missing now is Dragonite, which is a shame really, it's my fave. Oh well...

    Nice little battle at the end, too bad Nico's getting away with May. At least for now....

    I appreciate a good villain, but it's still a villain! However, you make his character so interesting, I'm not sure if I can hate him...

    Great chapter, as always! Can't think of much else to say, so I'm gonna go to bed. See you around, maybe on the [continuation of shameless plug]awesome new AdvanceShipping thread![/continuation of shameless plug]

    Eagerly looking forward to the next chapter!
    Dave
    Former OSL Water Gym Leader, PASBL League Official, TL6, A- Ref, Dark Gym Leader, Fizzy Bubbles

    Random arts by DaisyInari


    Feel like a different style of battling? Where your Charizard isn't useless
    because your opponent has Stealth Rock up? Why not check out the:

    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    ASB has it's own subforum where you can can start with a basic squad of whatever
    first-stage Pokémon you want, and work your way up! Not sure how to begin?
    We have a Getting Started thread that covers the basics, plus you can ask for help in our Time Out Chat Thread.


  15. #90
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    837

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Chelc View Post
    Since I've been lurking this for a while... >_> I figured I should start reviewing. <_< *somewhat lazy person*

    I'm gonna be honest - I usually have a hard time reading chaptered fanfiction that focus on pairings that I don't support. However, the way you portrayed Ash and May's relationship in this...I really like it a lot. I felt like I was watching an actual episode while reading this, and I don't feel that way about a lot of Shipping fanfiction that I read.

    Everyone is in character (well, I guess Drew is a bit meaner than I expected, but it works out given the situation), and I feel you did extremely well with Ash. You definitely kept the dense part of him in tact. :p

    Anyways, yeah. If you couldn't already tell, I really love this fic. :D Everyone has basically said what I wanted to say regarding the chapters, so I'll just wait for the next chapter to "really" review. :x

    EDIT: Oh geeze, you just posted the next chapter while I was posting xD! I'll review in this post, then. Sorry about that!
    Haha, wow: first shadow_shipper and now Chelc. I'm honoured ^^ You're not both gonna gang up on me and make me change it into a Contestshipping fic, are you? ^_~

    Quote Originally Posted by DaveTheFishGuy View Post
    She's from Petalburg City. At least, in the anime. She lives in Littleroot in the game though, but I digest...
    Uh-oh, my bad. *edits* Been playing the game too much, obviously :p

    Quote Originally Posted by DaveTheFishGuy View Post
    Ouch. A little descriptive, don't you think? Anyways, it's still good. What's with TR getting all the Pseudo-Legendaries then? The only one missing now is Dragonite, which is a shame really, it's my fave. Oh well...
    Haha, sorry about that. I couldn't resist upping the drama, plus I wanted to portray just how savage and tough those Pokemon were.

    As for TR's possession of the ubers - remember in an earlier chapter where four Pokeballs were delivered to the gang? Those were the Pokemon in question.

    Thanks for the reviews! ^^
    Good Love Charm
    *COMPLETE*

  16. #91
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Earth, previously Gallifrey
    Posts
    404

    Default

    Great chapter!
    I just have one question... Why did you make that ending? *cries like Homer Simpson*
    Nah, I'm just kidding. The battles were awesome and the way you pulled them off was astounding (is that even a word?)
    Anyway keep that up!
    What Happens..., an AmourShipping fic.
    Read it if you want, I won't force you.
    Also, read my Amourshipping drabble, about Amourshipping.

    "An inspiring book on overcoming life's obstacles."
    New York Times 4-8-2016

    Write it down on your calendars.


    We're experiencing technical diFICculties,
    Please stand by.


    While I'm gone, I'm gonna read the whole of AmourShipping thread. Wish me luck.

  17. #92
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Switzerland, Europe
    Posts
    1,469

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post
    Haha, wow: first shadow_shipper and now Chelc. I'm honoured ^^ You're not both gonna gang up on me and make me change it into a Contestshipping fic, are you? ^_~
    ...nah...or are we ?
    ...and what do you mean : what pause ? xD

    Well, if you tell us to grab popcorn, how do you think I'd be able to write down what I think ?

    May likes being touched ^^' *shot* At least it's an instinct lol since she snapped out of it after a few seconds
    How dare you portray May like that ? xDDD

    That whole scene was very...extreme and degrading :/
    I mean, what made you make Drew treat her and talk to her like she's not a human being ?

    zomg !! Paul lieks May !!!1!1one xDD
    ...not Wait, why not ? Why can't you add a sort of twist ? After Drew exits the scene, have Ash and Paul's rivalry escalade to a new level !

    Wow...Team Rocket v.2.0, with new pokémon who can actually deal some damage !
    Epic...

    May thinking about Ash in a tuxedo was...random at a time like that ._.

    So much drama in this chapter
    Though you left me a bit puzzled with Drew and Paul's fates here...what are they going to do once they neutralise those two behemoths ? Will they join the group ?...

    Excellent ! Keep it up

    And don't worry about Chelc and me, we'll just be plotting behind your back

    See you next time ^^
    Because of serebiiforums, my Life has been put on hold...

    ...wait, that sounds wrong...
    ...yeah, it's the other way around.

    My Works : A, B, C, D, E

  18. #93
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Graduating Class of 2009!
    Posts
    902

    Default

    Yay, new chapter =D And is it okay if I have a hot dog instead of popcorn? We have no popcorn at home and it's lunch time D:

    Drew scowled at this response, steadying himself as he stood up as well and confronted the girl.

    "You belong to me, May!" he shouted back. "No-one else is allowed to touch you but me!"

    "You're pathetic!" May snapped. "I'm not your trophy, you know!"

    Drew growled, then noticed the girl's fanny pack where half of a pink ribbon with bold, white edges was on the verge of falling out. May soon noticed the boy's glance and hurriedly pushed the trinket back inside, zipping the pack up as quickly as she could.

    "Oh, I see." Drew commented, gritting his teeth as he did so. "This is about him. That's why you're here!"

    "I..." May stammered uncertainly. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

    "So you came all the way here to see HIM." Drew snarled. "I'm not letting that ignorant moron lay one finger on you, May! He doesn't deserve you!"

    "Don't you dare talk about Ash like that!" May exclaimed. "He's twice the man you'll ever be, Drew!"
    Holy-! Drew is a very evil person here! How can he talk to May like that? Treating her as if she were on object and not a human being >.<

    "Thanks, you guys!" May accepted the congratulations as modestly as she could. "And thanks for cheering for me, Ash."

    May smiled at the boy and gave him a sly wink.

    "But you know you don't have to keep jumping out of your seat every five minutes just for little old me."

    "Wha-!" Ash coughed, his face turning bright red as an intense blush took over him. "I wasn't, uh, I mean-"
    Aww, this was so kawaii I had to read it twice ^___^

    May extended her hand in friendship to the boy, who analysed it nonchalantly, his own hands remaining firmly in his pockets.

    "Paul." he said, turning away and heading towards the exit. He paused for a moment as he reached the door, then glanced over at the girl who was watching him, puzzled. "And May."

    An uncomfortable silence penetrated the waiting room as Paul carefully mulled over his words before finally committing to them.

    "Be careful."

    With those final words Paul excused himself from the waiting room, leaving May on her own to consider them carefully.
    Ooh, do I smell some Paul x May JKJK, but that was sweet of him to do, even though May has no idea what he's talking about

    She knew she couldn't lose. After all, she had him watching over her.

    Her good luck charm.
    This part was just adorable. Portrays their friendship perfectly <3

    "Ash!" May called out, rushing to his side and grabbing his arm worriedly. Ash made no resistance as he felt the girl's hands run over his shoulder and pull him closer to her. Ash responded by wrapping his arms around his friend, doing his best to shield her from the unending sandstorm whilst continuing to command Pikachu in battle as efficiently as he could.

    "Are you okay, May?" he whispered, causing her to look up and straight into his dark eyes. She paused for a moment, her fingers gently playing with the fabric of his shirt before answering.

    "Yeah."

    Ash smiled warmly at the girl, relieved by this answer as he returned his attentions to the battle at hand.
    Advanceshipping <3

    As they made their way towards the rendezvous point, Butch couldn't help but glance back over his shoulder to where Nico's Shiftry continued to lie, unconscious and alone.
    Okay, this part is sad D: They should have taken Shiftry with them.

    "May, you and Ash should go." he suggested. "Drew, Paul and I can stay here and keep these two at bay."
    Uh-oh, bet Nico wasn't expecting that =O

    "No!" Ash cried, doing his best to crawl closer to Nico, already his vision becoming blurry from the effects of Venomoth's powerful attack.

    "Ash!!" May called back, struggling against Butch as he shoved her into place in the helicopter's cargo hold. "Ash, no! Ash!!"

    "May, I'm coming!" Ash managed, struggling to get to his feet as pain coursed through his body, numbing all of his senses. "Hold on!"
    Oh my God, this is just sad D: But, the way you wrote it, I felt like I was sitting there watching it as it happened. This seems like a movie scene and something I could picture happening in Pokemon !

    On a side note, it seems that May makes the perfect DID, doesn't she? [DID = Damsel In Distress]

    It was cramped inside and Ash was by no means comfortable with the constant roar of the vehicle's powerful engines just a few feet above him. Such worries were trivial in his mind, however. All he could think of was one irreplaceable thing as the toxins of Venomoth's Stun Spore began to mercilessly lull the boy into a deep sleep.

    'May...' his thoughts echoed in his mind. 'I'm coming, May...'

    ~*~*~
    DAMN! A cliffhanger ;_; And I was waiting for more....

    Well, in general, the chapter was AWESOME, it was so drama-filled and I did not expect Team Rocket to show up like that right in the middle of Drew and May's battle. =O And, well, the advanceshipping in this chapter seemed to flow in perfectly. ^_^

    Great chapter as always, Spinner =D

    EDIT: Oh yeah, I saw like, No Dawn in this chapter =O Did she like run away or something? Or, wait, was she caught and uh... um... *attempts to remember what happened to Dawn*
    Last edited by Uzamaki Hinata; 6th July 2008 at 9:34 PM.
    ~*Uza-chan's Good bye*~

    IS SUPAH FIIIINE

  19. #94
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Nowhere near You
    Posts
    238

    Default

    Drama! I like some drama!

    That was a good double upload, it took the story forward quite a bit. I should say though, I was a little surprised that Flint brought only one Pokemon with him, despite knowing that a battle would follow. That's unprofessional of him.

    Anyway, we do get an Ash-trying-to-rescue-May scene. That's rather cute. I personally don't like May to be the "damsel in distress" - it kinda ruins her independent character, but it's alright a few times. Damn Nico, and poor Alisa - she doesn't realize that her father's innocence is all but fake.

    Lastly, Drew. How predictable - he's trying to sugarcoat his words and get May again. Not that he will.

  20. #95
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    120

    Default

    The first few chapters really drew me in, however I'm losing interest as it goes on. But I look forward to how this turns out.

    Don't forget to follow me on twitter: twitter.com/tsubasa1 and follow my blog: This Week in Pokemon.

  21. #96
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    837

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Chelc View Post
    EDIT: Okay, read the chapter, and...wow. That was super action packed, and not to mention, freaking awesome. Gah, Nico is...he bothers me. Though, that was probably your intention with him, lol. Geeze, Drew is being...something I probably shouldn't say here, though go May for fighting back. That was probably my favorite part of this chapter. :D Flint was a cool addition to the fic, too. I definitely wasn't expecting him. Poor May, though. ;_; I know Ash is on the way, so I'm not gonna worry so much. DREW WILL PAY FOR THOSE THINGS HE SAID ABOUT ASH. D: /lolAshfangirl
    Wow, thanks for the compliments ^^ I'm amazed you liked the May/Drew clash, considering that Drew's not being the nicest guy around right now, but I'm really pleased that I conveyed the right message there. Thanks for your input, I really appreciate it! ^^

    Quote Originally Posted by Sp1derp1g View Post
    Great chapter!
    I just have one question... Why did you make that ending? *cries like Homer Simpson*
    Nah, I'm just kidding. The battles were awesome and the way you pulled them off was astounding (is that even a word?)
    Anyway keep that up!
    Hehe, thanks :D And yes it's the best word ever.

    Quote Originally Posted by shadow_shipper View Post
    That whole scene was very...extreme and degrading :/
    I mean, what made you make Drew treat her and talk to her like she's not a human being ?
    Hey, I warned you at the start of this fic, y'know ^_~

    Quote Originally Posted by shadow_shipper View Post
    zomg !! Paul lieks May !!!1!1one xDD
    ...not :rolleyes: Wait, why not ? Why can't you add a sort of twist ? After Drew exits the scene, have Ash and Paul's rivalry escalade to a new level ! :D
    LOL, interesting concept there, shadow - who knows? ^_~

    Quote Originally Posted by shadow_shipper View Post
    So much drama in this chapter :)
    Though you left me a bit puzzled with Drew and Paul's fates here...what are they going to do once they neutralise those two behemoths ? Will they join the group ?...
    All in good time, my friend.

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    Aww, this was so kawaii I had to read it twice ^___^
    I loved writing that bit; it felt so anime-y ^^;

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    This part was just adorable. Portrays their friendship perfectly <3
    Not much I can say here except thank you! ^_^

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    Okay, this part is sad D: They should have taken Shiftry with them.
    Yeah, I felt bad writing that bit ;.; Poor Shiftry ;.;

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    Oh my God, this is just sad D: But, the way you wrote it, I felt like I was sitting there watching it as it happened. This seems like a movie scene and something I could picture happening in Pokemon !
    Wow, thank you! ^^ I was wanting to portray this whole fic as being Pokemon movie-like, so that's a huge compliment ^^

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzamaki Hinata View Post
    Well, in general, the chapter was AWESOME, it was so drama-filled and I did not expect Team Rocket to show up like that right in the middle of Drew and May's battle. =O And, well, the advanceshipping in this chapter seemed to flow in perfectly. ^_^

    Great chapter as always, Spinner =D

    EDIT: Oh yeah, I saw like, No Dawn in this chapter =O Did she like run away or something? Or, wait, was she caught and uh... um... *attempts to remember what happened to Dawn*
    You'll see what happens - I didn't forget about her. Thank you so much for such an awesome review, Uza-chan! ^_^

    Quote Originally Posted by EarthBorn View Post
    Drama! I like some drama!

    That was a good double upload, it took the story forward quite a bit. I should say though, I was a little surprised that Flint brought only one Pokemon with him, despite knowing that a battle would follow. That's unprofessional of him.

    Anyway, we do get an Ash-trying-to-rescue-May scene. That's rather cute. :) I personally don't like May to be the "damsel in distress" - it kinda ruins her independent character, but it's alright a few times. Damn Nico, and poor Alisa - she doesn't realize that her father's innocence is all but fake.

    Lastly, Drew. How predictable - he's trying to sugarcoat his words and get May again. Not that he will. :)
    Haha, yes, you know how it is, EarthBorn! :D Thanks for your review; I'm glad the double-post wasn't too much story to read through ^^

    Quote Originally Posted by Daisenki View Post
    The first few chapters really drew me in, however I'm losing interest as it goes on. But I look forward to how this turns out.
    Well, that sucks. Can you maybe elaborate on what made you lose interest and at what point? It'd really help me in the future direction of this fic and others I write.

    As always, thanks to everyone for your reviews ^^
    Good Love Charm
    *COMPLETE*

  22. #97
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    120

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gazmof View Post

    Well, that sucks. Can you maybe elaborate on what made you lose interest and at what point? It'd really help me in the future direction of this fic and others I write.

    As always, thanks to everyone for your reviews ^^
    I think most of it is my own personal preferences, for a shipping fic I usually tune out other stuff that's happening within the story. For example, I skip most of the battling because I find that its unnecessary needed and any other shippings that isn't the main one, for example in this one it's Dawn+Drew, I can't relate to it, so I also skip those parts.

    Don't forget to follow me on twitter: twitter.com/tsubasa1 and follow my blog: This Week in Pokemon.

  23. #98
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    In Solidary Training
    Posts
    335

    Default

    Man, this is an incredible fic. One of the best I have ever read! Keep up the great work!

    When the next chapter comes out, I'll make sure to write an extensive rate and review! Reading then!
    3DS Friend Code: 2079-6549-2981
    "Let's trade and battle!" - *message me first*
    I am a shadow, I seek the ways of Hadou.
    I'll have you know, I am a Lucario.

  24. #99
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    in the clouds
    Posts
    789

    Default

    Mo' drama!!! Mo' evil Drew! ^^ ar, sorry, I just like evil Drew =DD I'l be waiting for the next chapter~

    Seems like a long time since I gave a review

    This is the start of a brand new journey...

    FF.Net +
    PB + DA + Blog

  25. #100

    Default

    Hahaha, very action packed story in there. Lots of battle and suspense to change the romantic pace of the story. It's very refreshing pace from there, and the visit from Flint was quite awesome. Hehe, I think everyone already said what I would have said, but anyway, it's pretty awesome. Hahaha, I love your portrayal of Drew. Now I can't wait to see what happen nexts.
    I waste my life away on Nico Nico Douga.

Page 4 of 9 FirstFirst 12345678 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •