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Thread: Commitment

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Laguna, Philippines
    Posts
    270

    Default Commitment

    This is another(before I run out) AaMayl from me, sequel to the abysmal "Acquaintance Party". And, here's my usual trademark(XP) foreword:
    DO NOT ENJOY
    RATING:
    G
    DISCLAIMER: I don't own pokemon.

    Part 1: Sister Knows Best

    They think they've done good for the sake of their friend, but oh, were they wrong. Ash Ketchum has been in a deep funk ever since "that magical night", all because he met the girl of his dreams. And he's got his friends to bla-, I mean, thank, for that.

    ---At the End of that "Magical Night"---

    "Well, Ash," Richie said, braking the convertible right in front of the Ketchums' driveway, "this is your stop. See you tomorrow, of course?"

    "Huh? What?" Obviously Ash wasn't listening. He was instead just staring off into the distance, before he realised that they were in front of his house. He lazily jumped out of the car, and said, "Oh, yeah, sure, whatever. See ya."

    The other teens watched as Ash disappeared inside his house, then turned to Richie. "What, everyone still blaming me for ruining their moment? Sheesh!"

    ---

    Ash plopped down to his bed. As usual, he was home alone, but he doesn't mind. He went upstairs directly to his room, and after a glance at the clock(2:40 AM), he plopped down to his bed. Without even changing his clothes, he drifted off to sleep.

    His sleep, however, was interrupted almost immediately by a late night phone call. 'Ugh, who calls at this time of the night?' He deicided to let the answering machine record it, so he doesn't have to get up from bed.

    When he did get to answer it at 9:00 AM, he found out the late night caller was Jeanne, Ash's very own college sister. "Hey, Ash, I was wondering if you could meet me for breakfast tomorrow at Pop's. I want to hear all about your Acquaintance Party."

    Ash groaned. "Breakfast? She was expecting me to meet her for breakfast after a late-night party? Some sister, she doesn't even care for my welfare!" He did, grudgingly, accept the breakfast date. After a quick shower, Ash hopped onto his red-and-blue bicycle, and rode it to the college's favorite hangout for teenagers.

    The titular proprietor of the fast-food joint, only known to everyone as "Pop's", was quite surprised when Ash walked into his store. "Why, Ash, I wasn't expecting you here so early because of the party."

    "Blame it on my sister, Pops. Is she still here?"

    "Well, it's about time you arrived," a voice from a far-corner booth piped up. "Being late means you had quite some time at the party, huh?"

    "Never mind, Pops." Ash grudgingly trudged over to the booth, where his sister sat.

    Jean Ketchum, the older of the two siblings, was a nursing major. She was a graduate of the same school Ash is attending right now, North High. She was the female eyecandy of her time there, catching the hearts of nearly every male, including Brock. As stated before, she's not on friendly terms with her father, but still maintains good contact with her little brother.

    "Pops, a round of cheeseburgers here please," Jeanne called. "And the breakfast special for me."

    Ash stared at her scornfully. "I hate you," he muttered so that only she can hear. "How am I supposed to return to sleep now after eating all this?" he added, as Pops came to their table with their orders.

    "Just go ahead and eat," Jeanne suggested, taking a sip from her cup of coffee. After Ash gave a huge bite into a burger, she asked, "So, how was it? Your first Acquaintance Party?"

    "It was fine, for a 'complete waste of my time'."

    Jeanne raised an eyebrow, while slicing her eggs. "Oh, really? Well," she added, "meet any special people during the party?" When there was no answer, she grinned. "I thought so. What is she like?"

    A nerve twitched in Ash's temple. 'How could sisters be this nosy?!' he thought. "What's it to you anyway?"

    "It's just that I want to make sure you end up with the right people. Now, I repeat my question: What's she like?"

    Ash grumbled something incoherent before answering. "She's a year younger than I am, and- Er-"

    "And?" Jeanne repeated. "And what?" No answer. Jeanne sighed. "You have got to be kidding me. Don't tell me that my own brother, a fan of mystery novels and observationist, doesn't even remember what a girl he met just last night is actually like?!"

    More nerves twitch. Ash swallowed an entire burger in one bite. "Don't complicate things sis. It's not like she's anything special." He did turn his face away at the last word, making Jeanne even more suspicious.

    "I knew it. My little brother's in love!" the girl declared.

    "Sssshhh! Don't say it out- Erk," Ash said.

    Jeanne's grin went even wider. "AHA! I knew it!"

    "Now I really hate you, sis," Ash muttered under his breath.

    ---

    Thanks to his sister, Ash is now wide awake to return to his house and sleep. After saying goodbye, the older Ketchum headed back to college for her morning class. Ash, meanwhile, still lingered by Pops', which by then was still void of customers thanks to last night. That moment, he began to contemplate on things: Is he really in love?

    'Nah, it can't be, can it?' he asked himself. "Sis is just playing with my head, right? Hey, that's got to be it! There's no way I'm in love!"

    CONTINUED
    -My wacky, Advanceshipping eFics:
    Trials of the Elite Four
    War of Legends
    Dream or Future?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    567

    Default

    Yay! You finally post this on Sppf.

    Interesting storyline here. Jeanne seems to be a really cool OC sister for Ash, helping him realize his true feelings. Aww. I like the way you incorporate your experience and the character's own personalities. Really nice.

    But is he in love? Only time can tell.

    Good job again. ~Star Dust~

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Laguna, Philippines
    Posts
    270

    Default

    -Once again, I have to put up that stupid name Disclaimer that was found at the end of movies(credits) and I posted earlier in Acquaintance Party. So here it is:

    All names, places, etc., yadda, yadda, yadda, are completely fictitous. If you share the name of some of the characters here, it's all just a coincidence, okay? Got it? Good!

    -I wonder if I'll get sued for something or another for mentioning real video games here. XP

    Part 2: Ash's First Date? Maybe...


    Our hero headed to the nearby cybercafe, which is basically a tradition for him every weekend ever since he moved into town. It is a haven for video game addicts of all ages, and, with the soda shop right next door, it's basically Ash's home away from home.

    At the cybercafe, Ash has pretty much earned a name for himself, as the "one who never quits a game until he finishes it". However, this title was put on hold, because of Ash's renewed fondness of multiplayer online games. As he set foot inside, the patrons took one look at him, and began talking to each other in hushed whispers.

    The teen ignored the whispers directed at him, and headed to the proprietor. His name was Edel, and he, in fact, was incidentally Pops' younger brother. Like his sibling, edel was quite surprised to find a North high student(although Ash is one of his regulars), largely due to the Acquaintance Party.

    "My usual spot, please, Mr. Edel," Ash said, dismissing the question the proprietor threw his way about his early arrival.

    Typing into his computer, which is the server of the entire cafe, Edel quickly announced, "Number 7, Ash. And, of course, the usual three hours?"

    "Yeah. Thanks." Ash proceeded to PC 7, ignoring the murmurs directed towards him along the way. He logged in, and started playing his favorite, Warcraft: DotA.

    Minutes into the game, a new customer arrived at the cafe, though Ash doesn't care about it. The PC right next to him, no. 8, started lighting up, meaning the newcomer selected that spot to use. To his astonishment, the person turned out to be May! And the latter showed mutual surprise at seeing Ash as well.

    "Ash?"

    "May?" Forgetting that their PC timer is still running, the two youngsters could only stare at each other.

    "Hey, you two know each other?" Edel called out to them. "Anyways, both of you'd better snap out of it, time's running you know."

    "Sorry!" the two shouted out in unison, causing the proprietor to raise an eyebrow in their direction. They returned to their "business" right after, Ash on with his games, and May logging into the Internet.

    "Um, so, how'd you sleep last night?" Ash asked suddenly.

    "I slept well," was the girl's reply. "What about you?"

    Ash shrugged. "Not so much, all because of a pesky sister..." May managed a small smile of amusement, and, although Ash intended his comment to be sarcastic, couldn't help but feel content for making her laugh.

    For some reason he couldn't explain, Ash's player character kept dying on him. Maybe he was a bit too distracted? Because of this, he decided to log out even though only an hour passed of his playthrough. He payed for his rental, and he couldn't explain why, but he didn't leave just yet. May, who only logged in for an hour, son finished her time and joined Ash at the counter to pay her own tab.

    "Um, Ash," May quietly said as Edel's cash register ringed for her money. "Care to join me next door for something to eat? It's getting pretty near lunchtime, and-"

    "Sure," was Ash's quick reply.

    May walked ahead, out of the cafe. Meanwhile, when she was now out of earshot, Edel teasingly told Ash, "It's not exactly a good thing for girls to ask guys on dates, Ash. It should be the other way around..."

    "Thanks for the reminder," Ash retorted, before following May. Outside, he found out that she was still waiting for him, without even entering Pops' soda shop yet. Ash clumsily led her inside, "slightly" by the arms even.

    Coincidentally, the booth May chose for them was the same on where Ash ate with Jeanne earlier. Ash ordered his usual servings(a plate of cheeseburgers and a side of fries), followed by May's(four large bowls of ramen and noodles); plus "bottomless" shakes for each of them. The two could only gawk at each other at the size of each of their own orders.

    "I can't believe you're going to finish all that, Ash."

    "Funny, I was about to say the same thing about you..." They both laughed, albeit sheepishly. To clear off his nervousness, Ash hastily bit a large portion of a burger he randomly picked from the top of the pile.

    For a few minutes, none of them spoke. Whilst May sipped her ramen, she also curiously watched people come in and out of the shop. Ash, however, watched her, wondering about something. When May did notice this, she asked, "Why are you looking at me like that, Ash? Is there something on my face?"

    Ash shook his head, and pointed to May's chopsticks, which she uses to eat her ramen. "I don't think I'll ever understand, or learn, how to use those things," he remarked.

    "Oh, it's not that hard. I could teach you, you know..."

    "Uh, no thanks," Ash replied, appalled at the thought of someone younger than him giving him lessons, even of any sort of subject.

    CONTINUED

    -PS: Some(maybe most) of the facts revealed in this fic correspond to facts about myself and my ex.
    -My wacky, Advanceshipping eFics:
    Trials of the Elite Four
    War of Legends
    Dream or Future?

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