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Thread: Destiny's Tricks [Parody]

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    CHAPTER INDEX:
    Prologue
    Chapter One: Great Leagacies! Of Starters, Studies, and Rivals!
    Chapter Two: First Footsteps! Generic Design, Crushes, and Chosen Ones!
    Chapter Three: First City! Of Details and Evil Teams!
    Chapter Four:Oreburgh Gate! Of First Catches, Underused and Overused Pokemon, and Destiny Powers
    Chapter Five: First Gym Battle! Of Canon, Elites, and Gym Battles!
    Chapter Six: Floaroma Town and Valley Windworks! Of Fans and Heorics!
    Chapter Seven
    Chapter Eight
    Chapter Nine
    Chapter Ten
    Epilogue
    (Don't remember what I named my chapters. Will come back with them...if Serebii won't lag. :X)

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    Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix
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    Hi, Bay here! Yes, another new fic by me. If you’re wondering, “Nothing, Everything” is still going on and it’s going strong. More info about this fic here. There’s a couple other things I want to say though.

    -This is a first time I’m doing a parody so it might be a little clumsy and sloppy at first, as far as what kind of comedy I really wan it to be (be it totally random, more sopshicated, etc.)Pretty much I wrote it from what kind of topics I want to address in each chapter and also put in a few random jokes here and there that’s related to the subject matter of this story. Also, if I went too far with some of the jokes, let me know and then I end. I try not to be too wild here. XD

    -Like I said in the preview, it’s not to insult but poke fun of some of the mistakes in OT Journey fics. I’ll say I pretty much noticed those mistakes from reading a few fics, many parodies, and also discussions from this forum and others too.

    - Also, I know there might be a few reviewers thinking that I’m making fun of their fic and that my reviews are lies. Rest assured the reviews I do are for real and that I would not lie on what I think of the fics. Again, this fic pretty much come from a couple other fics , from reading other parodies, and from discussions.This part is just incase.

    -This fic may contain but limited too the following: Legendaries, spam, teenagers being Chosen Ones, shippings, evil Pokemon, plus many others. :P

    This fic will be rated PG-13 for violence, language, and crude humor.

    Now…to the main entertainment! (pushes the Play button).

    Destiny’s Tricks

    [An OT Epic Journey Parody by Bay]

    PROLOGUE:
    OF VERY EXCITING PROLOGUES! IN NEED OF A GREAT EYE CATCHER!


    Destiny, a girl that believed everything revolved around her and that she was destined for more. Damon, a boy who questioned things and thought there was something more to his life. Duku, a boy with a tragic life and too believed there was a reason for his life. The three would soon face challenges, angst, love, hate, lies, secrets,…

    Wait, why there seemed to be stories with introductions of the characters and of how they would deal things like angst and romance? To set the stage, right? Meh, none of my business. Let us get on with this story.

    ///The Story Begins…///

    (Yes, this was an indicator that the story would begin soon. Anything I said before “The Story Beings” tagline does not count as part of the story. An author’s note, that was all.)

    The scenery was a bleak one, per say. One building was in shambles, every wall and glass window broken. The smoke led the skies to being gray and covered the sun. As the flames died down, people began crowding around to see two teenagers getting ready to attack each other. This was a show they did not want to miss, so people began cheering to whomever they want to win.

    Two people, two teenagers, two different genders. One has her whole body engulfed in blue flames while another has his right arm clouded in pink flames. Both grinned, knew this would be their final showdown, winner would take all.

    After both finished charging, the girl roared while the boy twirled his arm around as if he was pitching a baseball. Roar of Time and Spacial Rend soon burst out of their bodies and then the attacks collided.

    How did everything led up to this climax? Well, we would have to go back to the beginning so that you have just enough time to get to know the characters and cheer for them. Maybe twenty chapters before we get to this part? Still, you readers like to know every single detail about them even the non-important things, right? Before we get to when they first met, though…

    +++

    To make the prologue even more exciting, it was a few hundred years before the event of those two teenagers dueling out came about. There was a huge war going on in the Orre region because of endless bragging between the people of Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, and Sinnoh that their region was better. The war took place over there because none of the leaders want their region to be destroyed.

    The battle was coming to its climax, like all the beginnings in movies, stories, games, and other media that started out with battles. So far everything was in chaos. Underneath the clouded sky there were men sending flames that flew high, catapults throwing spam, trolls beating some of the soldiers to death or making them cry, and many hacked Kygore and Mewtwo going against each other until one got destroyed. There were legendaries participating the battle, but many Celebi and Mew looking like half finished clones would say otherwise.

    Okay, time to pick up the pace a bit, huh? What happened next was that things were about to change. Throughout the battle Lugia and Dialga were going against each other.

    …Wait, was not Dialga supposed to battle Palkia, you asked? A while ago Palkia was blown into a hundred pieces by the Time Pokémon, which I would not go into detail.

    Anyways, back to Dialga and Lugia’s battle. The great white bird with finger like wings and the majestic blue dinosaur with a big diamond on her chest took deep breaths. There were many burnt marks and grease from the spam dotted all over their bodies. After what seemed like forever, Lugia spoke.

    “Your time’s up!” Lugia said in a sly tone.

    Dialga rolled her eyes. “Have you been planning on using that pun for a while now?”

    Lugia’s mouth stuttered for some time before he spoke. His anger rose when the realization hit him Dialga did not like that pun.

    “Come on, it’s good!”

    Dialga just stared at him with no emotion shown. Lugia was about to say something, but then shook his head and instead decided to say something else.

    “Anyways, I think this battle’s drawing to its conclusion.”

    “Too bad the readers didn’t get to see the emotions and feelings of the citizens affected by this war."

    “It would bore them anyway,” Lugia reassured. “However, like I said, your time’s up! Prepare to be doomed with my Ultra Mega Blue Orb attack!”

    The Johto legendary stretched his neck and his mouth began to have a blue orb and it was becoming bigger and bigger. After the orb was ridiculously big, it fired at Dialga straight on.

    “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

    The flames screamed and ate her body away.

    “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

    After a while, the flames died down and then her body was practically barbequed. The burned Pokémon’s slow crash on the ground soon caused a huge earthquake. Everyone in the battle then stopped and stared with concern shown on their faces at the fallen legendary.

    Lugia smirked. “See, told you. Never mess with me and my well-thought out puns.”

    Dialga coughed before she spoke her last words. “Before I die, I’m going to heed this warning. Palkia and I will be back again battling against each other in five hundred years, but as teenagers. The big clash will be at Veilstone City where everything’s going downhill.”

    The white bird’s eyes twitched. He felt like slashing Dialga into a thousand pieces. Teenagers, why? Please tell me she’s joking.

    “Why?” Lugia stuttered.

    Dialga grinned but then coughed. “Because…it seems teenagers…are the most mature people around…or so I heard.” After she finished, she coughed some more and then died.

    Everyone started crying and yelling up to the heavens. Many cussed and shrieked while others kicked sand. Only Lugia did not mourn, though. His mind still thought about how she would be back a teenager.

    Better brace myself when that time comes.

    It would be his biggest challenge yet, indeed.

    +++

    Read quick on some of the things here:

    -The beginning of the prologue pretty much was from that recent topic in the Authors' Cafe of where it's a good place to start. Pretty much will say I too think it's a little tedious to wait for thirty chapters to have the story to the beginning to the flashback (that is if the prologue is a flashback, etc.).

    -The second part of the prologue I basically got that idea from seeing one of friends having a new game and starts off with a war going on. XD

    Well, I hope this fic is at least funny and hope I didn't do anything wrong. ^^;
    Last edited by Bay; 11th August 2008 at 8:42 PM.

  2. #2

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    “Your time’s up!” Lugia said in a sly tone.
    That made this fic.

    I read this a bunch because I was laughing so hard. I didn't notice any glaring errors in anything (Mostly because I wasn't really looking, and I can't notice those things anyway).

    The writing was amazing. Your humor was perfect, and the description of what happened to Dialga, and Lugia's afterthoughts, will be stuck in my head next time I'm possessed to write a Chosen One fic.

    I'm going to close with this line, witch will be added permently to my vocabulary

    Lugia smirked. “See, told you. Never mess with me and my well-thought out puns.”
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    Nice beginning. I shall follow this paordy fic then, as I've looked at it before and it intriged me, and also my love of parodies and comedies is great too.

    Anyway, good work on the 'special' prologue. Already liking the small jabs at Journey fics - and I'm liking the plot which is developing, which is not always evident in Journey fics... And you've already done it? You, have a lot of time on your hands...

    Anyway, quite nice. I quite like Lugiad and his wonderful puns. Not to mention the 'Ultra Mega Blue Orb' attack. Also liked the occassional breaking of the forth wall. Ended quicker than I thought - maybe could have been longer, but then again it's a prologue - probably just wanted more funniness.

    Wait, why there seemed to be stories with introductions of the characters and of how they would deal with(?) things like angst and romance?
    Doesn't quite fit in... and I'm not exactly sure of what you are trying to say... probably needs rewording.
    To make the prologue even more exciting, it was a few hundred years before the event of those two teenagers duelling out came about. There was a huge war going on in the Orre region because of endless bragging between the people of Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, and Sinnoh that their region was better. The war took place over there because none of the leaders want their region to be destroyed.
    Interesting explanation for Orre's troubled and ruined state. Although, I believe 'dueling' needs an extra 'l' in there...

    All in all, not a bad beginning, and nice humour in there.

    A parody of the Pokemon Colosseum game, full of pastries and Miror B.
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    Well, this definitely succeeded in making me laugh. ^^ The pun-using take on Lugia, the spam being used as a weapon, and even the title of the prologue... all of these things amused me, as did a few other things, as well.

    Highlights:

    PROLOGUE:
    OF VERY EXCITING PROLOGUES! IN NEED OF A GREAT EYE CATCHER!
    I love the prologue's title. XD

    Two people, two teenagers, two different genders.
    And I love the presence of that particular detail. XD

    There was a huge war going on in the Orre region because of endless bragging between the people of Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, and Sinnoh that their region was better.
    What an amusing reason for a war to start. XD

    Underneath the clouded sky there were men sending flames that flew high, catapults throwing spam, trolls beating some of the soldiers to death or making them cry, and many hacked Kygore and Mewtwo going against each other until one got destroyed.
    Fwee for spam as a weapon and hacked legendaries! XD

    Okay, time to pick up the pace a bit, huh? What happened next was that things were about to change. Throughout the battle Lugia and Dialga were going against each other.

    …Wait, was not Dialga supposed to battle Palkia, you asked? A while ago Palkia was blown into a hundred pieces by the Time Pokémon, which I would not go into detail.
    This made me smile, partly because I could totally imagine that passage as fitting right into one of PsiUmbreon's af;lkjglk;uer Chronicles. X3

    There were many burnt marks and grease from the spam dotted all over their bodies.
    Ew, spam grease. XP

    “Your time’s up!” Lugia said in a sly tone.

    Dialga rolled her eyes. “Have you been planning on using that pun for a while now?”

    Lugia’s mouth stuttered for some time before he spoke. His anger rose when the realization hit him Dialga did not like that pun.

    “Come on, it’s good!”
    One of my favorite parts in the prologue. The idea of Lugia using puns amuses me because it just seems so awesomely silly to me. XD

    “Anyways, I think this battle’s drawing to its conclusion.”

    “Too bad the readers didn’t get to see the emotions and feelings of the citizens affected by this war."
    I thought that part was brilliant. XD

    Prepare to be doomed with my Ultra Mega Blue Orb attack!
    I love the name of that attack. XD

    Lugia smirked. “See, told you. Never mess with me and my well-thought out puns.”
    That = gold. Again, Lugia being a pun-user amuses the heck out of me. XD

    Dialga coughed before she spoke her last words. “Before I die, I’m going to heed this warning. Palkia and I will be back again battling against each other in five hundred years, but as teenagers. The big clash will be at Veilstone City where everything’s going downhill.”

    The white bird’s eyes twitched. He felt like slashing Dialga into a thousand pieces. Teenagers, why? Please tell me she’s joking.

    “Why?” Lugia stuttered.

    Dialga grinned but then coughed. “Because…it seems teenagers…are the most mature people around…or so I heard.”
    I found Dialga's last line there to be very amusing. XD


    I'll definitely be sticking around for more of this. ^^
    Last edited by Sike Saner; 11th April 2008 at 8:12 AM.
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    Wandering Rhythmical Phoneix: You read this a bunch of times already? Oh my gosh, would never thought someone would read this many times and thinks its that funny! XD Also, glad you love the pun Lugia did. I love it too. :3

    bobandbill: Glad you like it! And if you’re wondering… this fic will break more walls than divinity_123’s fic. XD Nah, I’m not that skilled enough to break many walls and make it funny. ^^; Also, don’t worry…more funny is on the way.

    As for me having a lot of time on my hands: Yeah, I guess so. XD The thing is I was done with half of this fic during my spring break (didn’t go to Canjun sadly ) and this quarter in college I’m only taking three classes and there’re easy classes. However, in May I’ll be busy applying to another major ( sort of changing my major ) and also busy studying midterms. >.>

    Sike Saner: Of course proglogues need to be great eye catchers! You need to hook your readers! That’s how I did it with “Nothing, Everything”! Also, glad you like that pun scene too. ^^

    Well, since the beginning is just a prologue, why not go for Chapter One now? I’ll say this though: Don’t get your hopes up that this fic will be updated every few days. At the moment I’ll try to update it at least every couple of weeks. However, could be a chance I’ll post all of this before even getting all of Part One of “Nothing, Everything” posted. XD

    All right then, to the next chapter!

    CHAPTER ONE:
    GREAT LEGACIES! OF STARTERS, STUDIES AND RIVALS!


    ///Five hundred years later…///

    After the huge war between the four regions was over, everything seemed peaceful. There was still the occasional spam and bringing up of old arguments long dead, but overall everything was in order. However, that was about to change.

    In the huge Ilex Forest in Johto, Lugia and the three legendary dogs (or cats as many of the other legendaries mused whenever joking about their appearance) were discussing something very dire and urgent, and it had to deal with what was predicted five hundred years ago.

    “Okay guys, you all know what today is, right?” asked Lugia.

    “Is it Appreciate Legendaries Day?” asked Raikou while scratching his yellow fur covered with black stripes.

    “No, you idiot!” corrected the blue colored dog Suicune. While shaking her head, her purple mane swished and caused a few leaves to blow on Raikou’s face, which he then got them off. “Lugia, today is the day of Dialga’s warning, huh?”

    The Johto legendary shuddered at the thought. For five hundred years that warning kept coming in his dreams and he was not looking forward to it one bit.

    “Yes, Suicune. I’m bringing this up today because I want to say that we should brace ourselves for the worse.”

    “Seriously, I don’t know why the so called ‘Chosen Ones’ are almost always teenagers,” the huge furry dog legendary Entei complained with a snort.

    “Well, I chose teenagers because they seemed to be more mature for the job,” Raikou said. “I think ten year olds are too young to travel and very immature for the job. Adults I think they’ll be too busy with something else to go for a journey.”

    “In some cases, yes. However, not all teenagers are more mature than ten year olds,” Suicune argued. “Celebi told me one time how when he chose one ten year old and one fifteen year old, he believed the ten year old was more mature than the other one.”

    “And here’s another problem! Why the only two things happen to us is we either choose the kids or they save us from some evil organization?” Entei asked.

    That question soon got all three of them rambling about that. Lugia sighed and shook his head. He too wondered that, but at the same time he knew the meeting would have to end soon. Before he stopped them from talking any further, he roared so loud that some houses a few miles away had their glass windows shattered. That got the three’s attention in mere seconds.

    “All right. Now, as I was saying, we need to prepare ourselves for the worse. This teenager who has Dialga’s spirit will be a tough cookie to handle.”

    “How about the one who posses Palkia’s sprit?” asked Raikou.

    “We’ll worry about that teenager too, but I’m really more concern of the one that has Dialga’s powers. Who knows what kind of mischief that teenager will do?”

    All three nodded, agreeing the same thing.

    “Now, I must go. Should get some supplies and then head towards Sinnoh. Remember, prepare yourselves.”

    Entei, Suicune, and Raikou nodded again and then Lugia began flapping his wings. After a few beats, the psychic-flying type flew up in the sky and headed east.

    “Buy, Lugia! Be safe!” all three dogs chorused.

    As soon as Lugia left, Suicune sighed.

    “What’s wrong?” asked Raikou when he craned his head.

    “Just hope he’ll be fine and not be splattered by spam again like five hundred years ago,” Suicune answered.

    +++

    The sun rose up to light up Twinleaf Town. There was nothing much but a few houses and one small pond everyone went to check their reflections to pity themselves or to hide some secrets down there. Everything was quiet and peaceful, saved for one house.

    ‘DAMN IT! I’M LATE! ALSO, STUPID LAB AT ANOTHER TOWN A COUPLE OF MILES AWAY!”

    Inside the home, a young black haired girl ran down the stairs while her pink skirt was moving up and down. The girl was so focused straightening her black and white blouse that she lost footing and fell down. After the last bump, the girl moaned and slowly got up.

    “At least I didn’t die,” the young lady muttered to herself.

    Remembering why she was running in the first place, she rushed towards the kitchen. When the girl was inside, her mother was drinking coffee, a plate of eggs and bacon already ready and set on the table. Her blue hair was moving gently thanks to the open window.

    “Hello, Destiny,” her mother, Dawn, chirped while her blue eyes were looking at her daughter’s brown ones. Many people would compliment how the two actually look the same except for their eyes and hair color.

    The girl, Destiny, quickly ate her breakfast and said while munching, “Why you didn’t wake me up?”

    “I thought you woke up already. Besides, I also have to drop your sister to Pokémon School. She’s waiting until she’s fifteen like you to start her journey.”

    And why? Dawn added to herself. I started my journey when I was ten and I was more experienced that way.

    “But the eggs and bacon weren’t eaten yet!”

    “I thought you were too excited to eat,” the mother admitted with a shrug.

    After she finished eating her breakfast, Destiny gulped on her drink and then said, “Whatever. I’m late so it doesn’t change anything. Dad still busy being a Pokémon Master?”

    Her mother just nodded and drank her coffee.

    “Well, I got to go now! I’ll let you know from time to time how everything went!”

    After a wave goodbye, the girl sprinted out of the kitchen and then charged towards her destination, Sandgem City.

    +++

    While the fifteen year old ran, many things went thundering through her mind.

    I think I’m destined for something more. And hey, my name is Destiny!

    Ever since she was a child, she thought she was born for something more meaningful, with her parents being Ash Ketchum and Dawn …in fact, Destiny was not sure what was her mother’s old last name. Both of them were respectful trainers and coordinators, so anything was possible for her.

    I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more…

    Too wrap up in her thoughts, Destiny suddenly crashed onto a glass door. In cartoon fashion, her body slowly slid down towards the ground.

    “Ouch…” she moaned once more.

    The door then opened automatically and came out a white haired man wearing a long coat and carrying a suitcase. He sighed and shook his head.

    Is it just me, or it always seems the late ones will get the special ones? The League says to give them the really rare ones so that they won’t sue or burn the lab.

    As soon as Destiny got up, she forced herself a smile.

    “Oh, hi Professor Rowan! Sorry I’m late. Overslept.”

    “It’s fine,” Professor Rowan said with a tired smile. “Come on, let’s come inside.”

    +++

    Destiny let out a disappointed sigh when she saw there was nothing too spectacular about the lab, thought the place would be filled with new technology and many scientists. Instead, there were only a few machines, shelves filled with many dusty books, a couple of desks, and one skinny assistant typing on the computer. She sighed more heavily when she saw there was only a white hat on the silver desk. No pokeballs in sight.

    “What? There’s no pokeballs.”

    “Sorry, but three other trainers came before you. Don’t worry, I’ve a few spare ones somewhere in the other room. Also, I need to give you a pokedex.”

    Rowan quickly went inside the other room and took out many items while saying some rude things. Destiny’s eyes got wide while the assistant shook her head and then continued typing. After precisely three minutes later, Rowan came back with a pokeball and a pink pokedex, which Destiny grabbed quickly, her eyes went wide with anticipation.

    “Like, oh my gosh, what’s inside?”

    “Just open it,” Rowan instructed. Hidden though was a nervous tone.

    Okay, gotta prepare myself in three…

    Destiny pushed the white button and then bright light burst with life.

    Two…

    The white light faded and it revealed a small brown fox-like Pokémon wagging its huge fluffy tail. Rowan closed his eyes shut and covered her ears.

    One…

    “OH MY GOSH, AN EEVEE! SO KAWIIIIIIIII!”

    Destiny did not hesitate but hugged the Eevee so tight the poor little creature began choking to death. That caused the teenage girl to let go of her starter Pokémon .

    “Opps, didn’t meant to do that,” Destiny apologized with a giggle.

    After Eevee shook her head, Destiny opened her pokédex and it began talking in a chirpy voice.

    Eevee, a rare Pokémon that adapts to harsh weather by taking on different evolutionary forms.

    “WOW, SO COOL!”

    After Rowan uncovered his ears again, he coughed. “All right, Pokémon and pokédex are in check. Wait, there’s one other thing. If you want, you can have your Eevee evolve right now. I’ve some evolutionary stones with me.”

    “No thanks,” Destiny answered while petting her Eevee. “I’m actually thinking of evolving it to Espeon.”
    Professor Rowan’s eyes went wide at that comment. He then shook his head and laugh.

    “Espeon, ey? Well, you do know you’ll have to wait until both the daylight and when the two of you are more acquainted? I’m sure you want it to be a Jolteon already.”

    “Don’t worry, Eevee will evolve in no time, because I’m going to be really nice and never abuse it, EVER!”

    After Destiny screamed that last sentence, Professor Rowan felt his ears ringing. He shook his head a few times to clear his head and then smiled weakly.

    “Well, it’s all settled then, now you’re ready to…”

    His very encouraging speech was interrupted by a sound of the sliding door. In came a girl with long brown hair that matched the color of her eyes. When Dawn looked at her short sleeved blue shirt and red skirt, she shook her head.

    Showoff.

    “Professor Rowan, sorry to come back but I seem to forgot my…wait, you’re Destiny, right?”

    Destiny raised an eyebrow and then said, “Huh? How do you know?”

    The brown haired girl blinked slowly and then scratched her chin.

    “To tell you the truth, I’m not actually sure. It seems as if everything’s revolved around you already. Maybe it’s also because you’re known to be both Ash and Dawn’s daughter.”

    “AHEM.”

    Both girls turned around and faced Professor Rowan.

    “Destiny, let me introduce you to Carmen, one of the trainers that got their starter today.”

    “Really? Which one?” asked Destiny.

    Carmen gave out a smudged smile and then threw her pokéball. After the ball burst out light, it revealed a small blue penguin with a huge head and a small beak. Destiny’s eyes went wide and erupted in flames.

    “WHAT? YOU GOT A PIPLUP? I WANTED THAT POKEMON?”

    “Destiny, she got it fair and square,” Rowan said while trying to calm her down.

    “YOU GOT IT BECAUSE I WANTED IT!”

    Carmen stared at her as if she was a crazy woman that had too many cat Pokémon. “Like seriously, chill. I didn’t know you wanted a Piplup."

    “THAT’S IT! YOU’RE MY RIVAL NOW! LETS BATTLE! EEVEE, TACKLE THAT PIPLUP!”

    Eevee titled her head and then cooed, “Vee?”

    At first Carmen too was confused. Even though she chatted with that girl for two minutes, she already thought she was crazy.

    “Look Destiny, I don’t think you want to battle me yet.”

    “Why not?”

    “First of all, I’m eleven and starting on my journey…”

    “Well, I’m fifteen and I’m starting my journey here too,” Destiny interrupted. “I studied Pokémon at school.”

    “I’m not finished. Anyways, I’m starting on my journey here. I was actually runner up in the Kanto Pokémon League. Besides, I’m eleven and I already have experience in training.”

    “If you’re experienced, why don’t you have your Kanto Pokémon with you? Also, why are you getting a starter here?”

    “They’re all at Professor Oak’s lab to rest. Also, I want to start fresh and train different Pokémon to study what different skills and techniques Pokémon in different regions learned. I actually want to become a Pokémon researcher like Professor Oak and Rowan. ”

    Destiny still glared at her, not believing one thing. When she quickly glanced at Professor Rowan, he smiled and nodded.

    “It’s all true. Professor Oak called me to arrange for her to have her Pokémon well in advance. Also, I’ve seen her battle before. She’s really good.”

    “Anyways Professor, I just came to get my hat back. Seems like as if I forgot it so that I can meet my rival,” Carmen mused with a giggle. “Okay, see you soon. Will let both you and Oak know how things went.” She then gazed at Destiny. “And Destiny, I think we’ll battle together eventually.”

    “But how about now?” Destiny demanded in a whining voice.

    “Nah. More original that way to wait for the rival and protagonist to battle each other at the end than have them battle at the beginning and then rinse and repeat. Until then, ta-ta.”

    After returning her starter and getting her hat back, Carmen ran back and then was out of the lab. Destiny’s jaws just dropped.

    Rowan chuckled. “She’s something, huh?”

    Destiny instantly turned around and sighed. “Yeah, very rude and overconfident.” She then sighed again, deciding to forget about Carmen at the moment. “Well, I guess I should then start my journey. Before I go though, what two other trainers got their Pokémon?”

    “One is a boy you already know, your friend Damon. In fact, he’s waiting for you at the beach right now. The other trainer is a boy named Duku.”

    “Oh, cool! Thanks, Professor. All right, looks like I don’t need you anymore!”

    Destiny and her Eevee was about to rush out of the door but Professor Rowan grabbed the both of them. He glared at them as if a Pokémon was stolen and they would have to pay a huge fee for the damages.

    “Now hang on one second, young lady! I’m tired of trainers just coming here to get their Pokémon and then leave! That’s why my research is going slow now these days! Luckily one of the new features in the pokédex is a videophone. You bet that I’ll take advantage of that and keep checking up on you. Understand?”

    Destiny now had only one feeling towards the professor: fear. Both she and her Eevee answered with a gulped.

    “Good. Now then, have a safe journey,” the professor chimed all of a sudden.

    Not wanting to be screamed again, both Destiny and her Eevee thundered out of the lab in just a heartbeat. The professor chuckled and then shook his head.

    +++

    Pretty much what inspires this is of complaints that every journey fic starts out with the main character late and then get a special Pokemon and of how rivals are like Silver (GS games) or Gary (anime/RBY games). May (RSE games, not anime) is a nice one. XD

    Well, hope this chapter is as funny as the prologue. Expect Chapter Two to come most likely in late April, possibly after I got done with one of my midterms. ^^
    Last edited by Bay; 12th April 2008 at 5:12 AM. Reason: Forgot a quotation mark! Shame on me! =O


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  6. #6

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    FIRST, I have to point out a mistake before I begen to praise you. PRAISE YOU!
    Carmen stared at her as if she was a crazy woman that had too many cat Pokémon. “Like seriously, chill. I didn’t know you wanted a Piplup.
    You forgot an end quotation mark. FOR SHAME! Actually, this line was really funny, too, but that lack of quotation mark rode me for the rest of the line.

    SHAME!

    I'm done now...
    SHAME!

    *ahem*

    Anyhow:
    (SHAME!) The intro reminded me (Painfully) of my last fic, a chosen one fic. It was actually a fairly similar mental process, I think.

    “Is it Appreciate Legendaries Day?” asked Raikou while scratching his yellow fur covered with black stripes.
    I love Raikou. Excellent pokemon. I'd celebrate that holiday.

    “And here’s another problem! Why the only two things happen to us is we either choose the kids or they save us from some evil organization?” Entei asked.
    *Facepalm* You're doing that "Making me feel bad about exploiting cliches" thing again.

    Inside the home, a young black haired girl ran down the stairs while her pink skirt was moving up and down. The girl was so focused straightening her black and white blouse that she lost footing and fell down. After the last bump, the girl moaned and slowly got up.

    “At least I didn’t die,” the young lady muttered to herself.
    I do that ALL The time... except the skirt thing. I may be gay, but not that gay.
    Her line also made me chuckle, I said that same thing earlier today.

    Too wrap up in her thoughts, Destiny suddenly crashed onto a glass door. In cartoon fashion, her body slowly slid down towards the ground.

    “Ouch…” she moaned once more.
    Again, something I'd expect in a comedy, but funny none the less. This actually made me laugh out loud, attracting a strange look from my mom.

    Is it just me, or it always seems the late ones will get the special ones? The League says to give them the really rare ones so that they won’t sue or burn the lab.
    That's a policy I can love as a late starter myself!
    Can't promise I'd not do burning on purpose though.


    The white light faded and it revealed a small brown fox-like Pokémon wagging its huge fluffy tail. Rowan closed his eyes shut and covered her ears.

    One…

    “OH MY GOSH, AN EEVEE! SO KAWIIIIIIIII!”
    I feel Rowan's pain. I know a girl who does that exactly for no reason what so ever. I felt a pang of hate before I busted out laughing again.

    “THAT’S IT! YOU’RE MY RIVAL NOW! LETS BATTLE! EEVEE, TACKLE THAT PIPLUP!”
    That line, "You're my rival now" actually is used in my groups, followed by "Go Pikachu!" You netted an extra laugh from that for triggering that memory.

    “Now hang on one second, young lady! I’m tired of trainers just coming here to get their Pokémon and then leave! That’s why my research is going slow now these days! Luckily one of the new features in the pokédex is a videophone. You bet that I’ll take advantage of that and keep checking up on you. Understand?”
    Actually, I think that's spsoed to be "And then leaving" but...
    I always wondered why the professors didn't complain about that more.

    I'd quote more but I don't feel like quoting everything I though was funny (Read: Everything)
    Hooray for college
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    Wandering Rhymetical Phoenix: Glad you like this chapter! Haha, don't worry I had already edit that little mistake. Don't know why I didn't catch that. O.o Okay, going to respond to a few of your responeses:

    *Facepalm* You're doing that "Making me feel bad about exploiting cliches" thing again.
    (Hugs) Don't worry, if this makes you feel any better, I before too wanted to write a real OT fic filled with prophecies, Chosen Ones, and romances and I began doing Pokemon fanfiction. Seriously. XD

    Again, something I'd expect in a comedy, but funny none the less. This actually made me laugh out loud, attracting a strange look from my mom.
    Oh man, I remember too one time while reading one of the fanfics here, I laughed and then my mom too asked why I'm laughing. XD

    That's a policy I can love as a late starter myself!
    Can't promise I'd not do burning on purpose though.
    I just came up with that idea thinking why would the professors give out those special Pokemon to the trainers? Answer: so they won't get mad.


    Again, thanks for the review! ^^


    To everyone: Expect Chapter Two either Wednesday or Friday. ^^


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  8. #8
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    Hurray for being late! Only realised this was updated much eariler (but had been on a week holiday). Anyway, again, nice work. Some funny jokes there, and good jabs at the whole 'getting the starter Pokemon' thing. Certainly intriguing as well - and I wonder which of the boys (Damon or Doku) will be the rival to Destiny...

    Pretty funny though - a few small msitakes in places, but nothing major.

    While shaking her head, her purple mane swished and caused a few leaves to blow on Raikou’s face, which he then got them off.
    That just felt a tad uncomfortable - a bt of a switch in tenses there in the middle. Last bit feels a tad clumsy.
    Ever since she was a child, she thought she was born for something more meaningful, with her parents being Ash Ketchum and Dawn in fact, Destiny was not sure what was her mother’s old last name.
    That ellipse needs joining up with 'Dawn' there...
    I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more…

    Too wrapped up in her thoughts, Destiny suddenly crashed onto a glass door.
    Wrapped rather than wrap - but still funny.
    Is it just me, or it always seems the late ones will get the special ones? The League says to give them the really rare ones so that they won’t sue or burn the lab.
    I like that explanation.
    Destiny did not hesitate but hugged the Eevee so tight the poor little creature began choking to death. That caused the teenage girl to let go of her starter Pokémon .
    Poor Eevee. It must be tough for the rare starter Pokemon. Also, there's a gap between Pokemon and the full stop there.
    Carmen stared at her as if she was a crazy woman that had too many cat Pokémon.
    Good reference there.
    Not wanting to be screamed at again, both Destiny and her Eevee thundered out of the lab in just a heartbeat.
    Suggest the 'at'.

    Still, quite funny - good job on it! Looking forward to more parodies.

    A parody of the Pokemon Colosseum game, full of pastries and Miror B.
    Completed. Four times winner of Best Comedy/Funniest Fic.

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    Well well. The famous fic of Bay's that I'm finally reviewing. Nice job, here. I wasn't quite sure what to expect from a parody fic of yours, and I was actually fairly impressed. I was expecting something like Divinity's fic, but then again. If you had recreated THAT level of insanity, he probably would have left the forum. XD

    What we've got here...is certainly interesting. One thing I'm not clear on is the description, however. It certainly is very bare bones, but is that the way you want it? The rest of the fic is quite normal (well...you know what I mean. Or maybe you don't...), but the description left me scratching my head a few times. Like here:

    His very encouraging speech was interrupted by a sound of the sliding door. In came a girl with long brown hair that matched the color of her eyes. When Dawn looked at her short sleeved blue shirt and red skirt, she shook her head.
    This girl is eleven, right? Why was "Dawn" jealous? But I'm getting ahead of myself. I just really couldn't get a good picture of what Carmen looked like here. I'm just curious if you meant to do that. Anyway...

    The battle was coming to its climax, like all the beginnings in movies, stories, games, and other media that started out with battles. So far everything was in chaos. Underneath the clouded sky there were men sending flames that flew high, catapults throwing spam, trolls beating some of the soldiers to death or making them cry, and many hacked Kygore and Mewtwo going against each other until one got destroyed. There were legendaries participating the battle, but many Celebi and Mew looking like half finished clones would say otherwise.
    XD Pure awesomeness. It's hard to say what I liked more, the hacked Pokemon or the spam catapults.

    Anyways, back to Dialga and Lugia’s battle. The great white bird with finger like wings and the majestic blue dinosaur with a big diamond on her chest took deep breaths. There were many burnt marks and grease from the spam dotted all over their bodies. After what seemed like forever, Lugia spoke.

    “Your time’s up!” Lugia said in a sly tone.
    Heh, nice. I didn't really expect Lugia to be using puns, which made it even funnier. Yeah...

    “Is it Appreciate Legendaries Day?” asked Raikou while scratching his yellow fur covered with black stripes.
    XD Nice.

    Yeah, not much of a review. Something about fics like this make my reviews turn into so much as spewing praise. Not to say you don't deserve it, as you did a very good job here. Sorry about how long it took for me to review, but nice job here. Keep this one up, for sure.

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    bobandbill: Well, who would be Destiny's rival...it'll be answered somewhat next chapter. ^^ Also, glad you like that explination as to why the late people get the special starters.

    duncan: Yeah, the description in this story will be a bit of bare bones so that I won't slow the story down too much. I always tend to not too much description in my comedies. XD However, I'll try to beef up the description a bit so that it won't look like the story is just with dialogue. XD

    Why Destiny is jealous? Carmen actually has some training experience. ^O^ Also, sorry that I didn't do too much description of Carmen. Don't want to suddenly stop and describe everything of her from her hair to the fabric of her clothing. ^^; I'm still trying to write description that's of the right medium, if you know what I mean.

    And oh, this fic will get crazier, though not as much as Divinity's.

    Again, thanks you two for reviewing! ^^

    And to everyone, sorry that Chapter Two is not up yet, been busy with a lot of stuff. Well, I'll say that maybe this week or next week expect the next chapter to come and there's a couple of things you guys will probably like.


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    Okay everyone, here's Chapter Two! Sorry it took a little while, been busy with school, work, and "Nothing, Everything". Well, hope you guys enjoy this one.

    CHAPTER TWO:
    FIRST FOOTSTEPS! GENERIC DESIGN, CRUSHES AND CHOSEN ONES!


    ///Now where should we start…///

    “Destiny, are you there?”

    Lugia was flying at Canalave City looking for any teenagers around. It was still early on this windy morning so not much people out yet except for a few fishermen. He smiled, thought the city would be a very comfortable and quiet place to live in if he was a human. There was the gym and Pokémon Center but also the Harbor Inn, the Canalave Library, and many cabin-like houses. The legendary Pokemon’s smile got bigger when at the port he saw a teenage black haired girl looking at her black and white blouse and pink skirt.

    That’s must be her. I can feel the Chosen One powers surrounding her.

    Could not wait to do this, he took a deep breath and then spoke in a very powerful tone, each word caused the wind to be stronger.

    “DESTINY KETCHUM, YOU ARE CHOSEN TO SAVE THE WORLD!”

    Part of Lugia wondered how he suddenly knew Dialga’s teenage form would be inside the body of a girl named Destiny Ketchum. He then shrugged, decided it must be because it was part of his psychic abilities.

    After hearing that, the girl turned around and stared at Lugia in a confused look. “Excuse me, I think you got the wrong girl.”

    Lugia titled his head and glared at her as if he was told he was in a different region.

    “So you’re not Destiny Ketchum?”

    The girl shook her head. “No. My name’s Hikari and I’m waiting for Uxie to tell me more information about my destiny.”

    “So you’re already chosen?”

    The teenager grinned and nodded. All of a sudden, two different female voices was heard.

    “You’re waiting for Uxie? I’m waiting for Azelf while my two other companions wait for Uxie and Mespirt, though not here and instead at a cave somewhere.”

    “I’m actually chosen by Giratina and I’ll be meeting him at Iron Island.”

    Lugia turned around and saw two teenage girls coming, both look exactly like Hikari. When he saw Hikari and the two other Chosen Ones side by side and staring at him, he felt his head was about to explode.

    “Wait, there’s three Hikari?”

    “No, I’m Failynn,” answered one of the girls.

    “And I’m Mitsu,” answered the other.

    Lugia stared at them longer, still confused why the three looked alike. He then shook his head to clear his mind.

    “Wait, let me get this straight. You all three are already chosen?”

    All three girls nodded.

    “Well, then why all of you look alike and wearing the same clothes?”

    “I guess it’s the new craze,” Hikari answered with a shrug.

    Lugia shook his head, thought this would get him to nowhere. At least he knew Destiny was not here.

    “Whatever! All you three find other Chosen One fics to star in. Scram!”

    Wanted to show he meant business, he roared and then flapped his wings. The wind made the three girls shield their faces with their hands, many leaves and splashes of water hitting them. As soon as the gust died down, all three girls screamed and ran. Lugia chuckled at that sight and then flew away.

    +++

    Still wounded from not battling with her rival Carmen, Destiny kept huffing and puffing while walking towards the beach.

    “That stupid Carmen! Thinks she’s much better than me? I’m the one that studied Pokemon while she battled. What can you learn from battling, anyways? Ha, I’ll show her that I’m better than her as I’m destined for greatness!”

    When she stepped on the sand, her eyes suddenly see the person she was looking for. The boy ran his fingers through his puffy blonde hair and then his hazel eyes twinkled when he looked at her. Besides him was a green turtle Pokemon with two leafs on his head and a bottom yellowed jaw. He was sleeping, his shell shined from the sun.

    “Destiny! Finally, you’re here!” screamed the boy while waving.

    “Damon!” Destiny said while waving back. “And kawaii, you got a Turtwig!”

    “I know. He’s awesome, huh?”

    The Turwig suddenly snored and then a bubble came out of his nose. Destiny’s eyes got wide, as if they contradicted what Damon said. She then shook her head.

    “Anyways, I see you got an Eevee there. Something’s wrong, though.”

    “Huh, why?”

    “Eve?” the Eevee asked in confusion, her head titled every so cutely.

    “Eevees are usually natives of Kanto and Johto. Even then it’s hard to get those things.”

    Destiny shrugged. “I’m lucky, I guess.”

    Damon shrugged too. “Anyways, I really can’t wait for this journey to start. This is going to be so fun. Just you and me…”

    Just you and me.

    Damon then looked as if he already ate too much of his favorite ice cream. For the past few years he had a crush on Destiny but never told her. What attracted to her….well, what was more important was eventually his crush would cause drama of sorts and his heart would soon be crush.

    “Damon? Damon?”

    Destiny’s voice woke Damon up from his daydream. He then blushed dark red in huge embarrassment.

    “Yeah, Destiny?”

    “I think I already found my soulmate?”

    One of Damon’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me?”

    Destiny pointed to a green haired boy with his long sleeve button shirt moving gently from the breeze. While his hands were brushing the sand off from his brown pants, his dull colored eyes showed of tragedy and no happiness in his life.

    “Wait, you mean you think that emo kid is your soulmate?”

    Destiny nodded. “Of course! Have you ever heard of opposites attract? Seriously, this happens in all trainer stories I heard on television. A beautiful and sweet girl falls for a handsome but quiet boy. The girl then is the only one able to have the boy open up more and then the two live happily ever after.”

    Damon felt his heart skip a beat when he saw Destiny’s eyes turned into hearts and some hearts floating around her. The Eevee just titled her head, not knowing that her trainer was now in love.

    “Don’t tell me you want him to join us?” Damon asked with urgency. “He’ll slow us down! That emo kid will probably want us to feel sorry and such.”

    Destiny instantly stop from her lovely-dovey phase and glared at him angrily.

    “Of course! I think it’ll be fun with the three of us! And don’t argue as I’m going to be right when there will be lots of drama soon!” After she finished, she then winked to no one in particular.

    Damon titled his head in confusion but then shrugged. One thing for certain was that he did not want to create an argument that might make Destiny only want that emo boy and her traveling alone.

    “Okay, fine. I’m not looking forward to this drama coming up, though.”

    Destiny squealed and then walked slowly…or should I saw hopped towards the boy. As soon as she was close to the boy, the girl tapped him on the shoulder. The boy then slowly turned his head to stare at her with confused eyes.

    “Huh, for some reason I for sure know your name is Destiny!”

    Destiny squealed. “Don’t worry, everyone knows me because my parents are Ash and Dawn, two great trainers. So, what’s your name?”

    “Duku,” the boy said simply. There was no smile on his face. “I came here because back at Hoenn I’m supposed to be going to another town with fresher air because of my poor health. However, it seems I accidentally feel into the ocean but was wash ashore here. It was as if I was meant to be here instead or something.”

    Destiny’s eyes already welled up in tears. “Oh my gosh, that’s so sad! You having poor health and also lost while on your journey!”

    Duku was at first unsure about how to react, but then decided it was probably just a girl thing to be already swayed with tragic events like that.

    “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m alive and that’s all that matters,” he assured with a smile.

    As if by magic, Destiny squealed and then hugged him tightly, which took Duku by surprise. Both teens then heard Damon’s voice.

    “Ahem. Guys, sorry to break up this first love in sight thing, but I think this plot should be moving along with all of us going to our first destination, Jubilife City.”

    Knowing that he was right, both teens nodded. The three were about to leave until they suddenly two objects wash ashore. They were two orbs, one blue and one pink. Destiny and Duku, curious what those things are, bend then and almost touch it until Damon screamed.

    “Wait, guys! You don’t know that those things are?”

    Too late. Destiny and Duku touched it and then all of a sudden, blue and pink flames engulfed their bodies.

    “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” both of them yelled

    +++
    Dang teenagers. Why it always have to be them?

    Lugia’s mind was still thinking about that warning Dialga told him five hundred years ago. Now today was the day it would happen, it would be the worst day of his life.

    I will be damn if the Chosen Ones are teenagers aga-

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


    Lugia felt his head was about to explode after hearing two different voice, a male and female one, screaming. After the screaming was over, he could only think of one explanation.”

    Crap, it’s starting now.

    Wanting this Chosen One introduction to be done and over with, Lugia began flying faster towards the source of the scream.

    +++

    “Destiny, Duku!”

    The flames soon started to faded and then both Duku and Destiny fell down, both their bodies not having any burns. How could that happen when Dialga was burned back to death in the prologue? Oh wait, I think I was too quick to ask. Anyways…

    “Um…what happened?” Destiny moaned.

    Right on que, a heavenly male voice spoke ominously. The breeze began to pick up with each of his majestic and holy words.

    “DESTINY KETCHUM AND DUKU SANSEI, BOTH OF YOU ARE CHOSEN TO SAVE THE WORLD!”

    All three teenagers and the two Pokemon gave confused looks. They then looked up and saw a huge bird Pokemon with hand-like wings staring at them.

    “LUGIA?” everyone shouted, even the Pokemon though in their own language.

    “Yes, the one and only. Both of you touch the Adamant Orb and Lustrous Orb, respectively. Now you two will have the powers of Dialga and Palkia.”

    Destiny’s eyes went wide. “Wait, we have the powers of Dialga and Palkia.” She then screamed, which made everyone cover their ears. “I know I’m destined for something!”

    Duku was speechless. For years his tragic made him not liking himself and not sure if he should be living. However, the prospect of being the Chosen One could change all that. Damon, on the one hand, was scratching his chin. There was something wrong about him being in this region in the first place.

    “Wait, Lugia. You’re a Johto legendary. Why you’re here telling them that and not one of the Sinnoh legendaries?”

    “Well, both Palkia and Dialga died five hundred years ago and the other legendaries already have their Chosen Ones being picked. Besides, I’m just telling and not choosing. Speaking of five hundred years ago, there is something I should say. During that time before Dialga died, she prophesied of how both she and Palkia will go against each other at Mt. Cornet, but as teenagers. Pretty much you two kids touched their spirits there.”

    “Is it accident or meant for us?” Duku asked.

    “Most likely it’s meant for both of you as Dialga did say there will be teenagers the one battling up there. Also, seems like this story pretty much will dealt with you two dealing with this conflict, especially when both of you are more likely to fall or each other sooner or later.”

    Duku did not listen on the part of how the two of them will fall for each other. His mind was still thinking of how he was a Chosen One. Already Destiny welled up tears. The teenager could not believe she would have to defeat her possible soulmate.

    “No, that can’t happen!” she whimpered. “Duku and I are meant to be together!”

    “Sorry, but that bound to happen if this journey were to have a tragic ending.”

    “One more thing,” Damon asked. “If you’re not a Sinnoh legendary, then what’s your purpose here besides telling them that?”

    “Let’s say I’m here to join the ride. Well, nothing more to say but good luck, kids!”

    In the speed of light Lugia flew off. Everyone just stared at him as if he was some lunatic. Silence held on for some time, but it did not last long as Destiny’s laugh broke the curse.

    “Come on, you two! I think this will be a really fun experience! We’ll save the world and our Pokemon will be better then everyone’s else!”

    All of a sudden Destiny began strutting and then was singing very energetically. Everyone glared at her in confusion.

    “My Pokemon brings all the boys to the yard and they’re like, wanna trade cards? Damn right, I wanna trade cards! I can beat you, I’ve got Charizard!”

    Both Turtwig and Eevee tilted their head and muttered in bewilderment. Duku’s eyes went wide while he was still thinking what to make up of it. He then whispered to Damon.
    “Is she always that crazy?”

    Damon gulped and then laughed nervously.

    “Yeah, she can be weird sometimes. Don’t worry, you’ll get used to it.”

    Duku grunted and shook his head, believing that would not be the case.

    Sure hope so.


    A few things I want to mention:

    -The part where the three "Dawns" appeared is bascially based how most of the original trainers fics I saw seems to use the character design of the games. XD Also, the joke “Go find other Chosen Fics to find” I got it from the old Looney Toons cartoon called “Red Rodent Hood” and there’s one part where Sylvester the cat (think I spelled his name wrong, lol) was playing the part as the wolf in Grandma’s clothing but then found four other cats also as wolves in Grandma’s clothing. XD

    -The song Destiny sang at the end is based around that avatar ( the one with May, Ash, and the Charizard card) that parodies the song "Milkshake" by Kelis. Seriously, that avatar rules. XD

    Well, hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Next one shall come soon! ^^ And oh, forgot about this: I’m doing a PM list so if you guys want me to PM you when the next chapter is posted, let me know! ^^
    Last edited by Bay; 6th May 2008 at 1:29 AM.


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    Ah, nice work on that again. Good jokes all around, but also a few mistakes. Very enjoyable though - nice to have a laugh now and then.

    Could not wait to do this, he took a deep breath and then spoke in a very powerful tone, each word caused the wind to be stronger.
    First 6 words somewhat contridicts with the rest of the sentence there (maybe 'Unable to wait, he took....')?
    After hearing that, the girl turned around and stared at Lugia in a confused look. “Excuse me, I think you got the wrong girl.”

    Lugia titled his head and glared at her as if he was told he was in a different region.

    “So you’re not Destiny Ketchum?”

    The girl shook her head. “No. My name’s Hikari and I’m waiting for Uxie to tell me more information about my destiny.”
    Now that was well done. Unexpected, and quite funny. A writer of comedy can enjoy such things.
    “I’m actually chosen by Giratina and I’ll be meeting him at Iron Island.”
    Minor - but isn't Giratina on the opposite (somewhat) of Sinnoh to Iron Island? Minor and probably not important though...
    Lugia shook his head, thought this would get him to nowhere. At least he knew Destiny was not here.
    Seems a tad clumsy with the slight tense confusions with the events around happening in the present... blah, I'm being confusing.
    “Whatever! All you three find other Chosen One fics to star in. Scram!”

    well, what was more important was eventually his crush would cause drama of sorts and his heart would soon be crushed.
    “I think I already found my soulmate?”
    Either 'you think I already...', or no question mark as it seems more a statement then a question with that wording.
    his dull colored eyes showed of tragedy and no happiness in his life.
    Eh, doesn't feel right.
    However, it seems I accidentally feel into the ocean but was wash ashore here.
    Fell, not feel. Quite the accident though.
    You don’t know that those things are?”
    Hmm... I'd say 'You don't know what those things are!' - a statement either way, rather than the question mark have an exclaimation mark.
    Both of you touched the Adamant Orb and Lustrous Orb, respectively.
    “My Pokemon brings all the boys to the yard and they’re like, wanna trade cards? Damn right, I wanna trade cards! I can beat you, I’ve got Charizard!”

    Both Turtwig and Eevee tilted their head and muttered in bewilderment.
    I though the 'other chosen people' joke was the funniest thing, but this wins. Very much so. Especially that a friend of mine is the sort of person who might say that sort of thing...

    In short - good work once again - nice comedy. Keep it up!

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  13. #13

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    It was totally worth waiting to read this till after I finished my essay (I are responsible student!)

    Bobandbill already caught the one mistake I saw (crushed), so I think I just get to name my highlights and point out a few things and what not.

    “DESTINY KETCHUM, YOU ARE CHOSEN TO SAVE THE WORLD!”

    Part of Lugia wondered how he suddenly knew Dialga’s teenage form would be inside the body of a girl named Destiny Ketchum. He then shrugged, decided it must be because it was part of his psychic abilities.
    I wish I wrote my Lugia half as funny as you wrote yours, but no, mine has to be all serious for the scene he's in. Both are overly dramatic, but yours is the GOOD over dramatic.

    “Well, then why all of you look alike and wearing the same clothes?”

    “I guess it’s the new craze,” Hikari answered with a shrug.

    Lugia shook his head, thought this would get him to nowhere. At least he knew Destiny was not here.

    “Whatever! All you three find other Chosen One fics to star in. Scram!”
    ... *sigh* yyyyeeeppp, Guilty of this too. All my heroes in my last fic are based directly off in-game sprites. Fortunately, I'm using original designs this time, making me feel less bad about myself!
    And Lugia may just have had the best moment in the story thus far right there.

    Wanted to show he meant business, he roared and then flapped his wings. The wind made the three girls shield their faces with their hands, many leaves and splashes of water hitting them. As soon as the gust died down, all three girls screamed and ran. Lugia chuckled at that sight and then flew away.
    Retract my last statement and put it here.


    When she stepped on the sand, her eyes suddenly saw the person she was looking for.
    I caught something after all! I think that's the right saw, but you mixed tense (Stepped, See).

    Besides him was a green turtle Pokemon with two leafs on his head and a bottom yellowed jaw. He was sleeping, his shell shined from the sun.
    Was that supposed to be "Besides him, there was a..." or "Beside him there was a..." ?

    “Damon!” Destiny said while waving back. “And kawaii, you got a Turtwig!”
    Oh god more kawaii...

    Damon shrugged too. “Anyways, I really can’t wait for this journey to start. This is going to be so fun. Just you and me…”

    Just you and me.
    The old "We're traveling together so we must be lovers" thing, huh? I actually attack that point a couple times in my story. It's one of my favorite cliches.

    While his hands were brushing the sand off from his brown pants, his dull colored eyes showed of tragedy and no happiness in his life.
    I'm with Damon on this kid:
    “Don’t tell me you want him to join us?” Damon asked with urgency. “He’ll slow us down! That emo kid will probably want us to feel sorry and such.”
    I bet he wears makeup too!


    “Huh, for some reason I for sure know your name is Destiny!”

    Destiny squealed. “Don’t worry, everyone knows me because my parents are Ash and Dawn, two great trainers. So, what’s your name?”
    *sigh* What a destiny *bricked*

    Destiny and Duku, curious what those things are, bend then and almost touch it until Damon screamed.
    "Destiny and Duku, both curious as to what those things were, bent down and almost touched them until Damon screamed."
    More keeping in tense, other wise you switch from present to past.... unless I'm totally wrong, in witch case: Ignore this statement completely.

    different voice, a male and female one, screaming. After the screaming was over, he could only think of one explanation.
    Random end quotation mark.

    “LUGIA?” everyone shouted, even the Pokemon though in their own language.

    “Yes, the one and only.
    Lugia is win. In bird form.

    For years his tragic made him not liking himself and not sure if he should be living. However, the prospect of being the Chosen One could change all that.
    His tragic... what?

    “Most likely it’s meant for both of you as Dialga did say there will be teenagers the one battling up there. Also, seems like this story pretty much will dealt with you two dealing with this conflict, especially when both of you are more likely to fall or each other sooner or later.”
    Lugia's story analysis is expert. How many other pokemon can completely analyze a story before it even happens?

    Duku grunted and shook his head, believing that would not be the case.

    Sure hope so.
    I kinda like Duku. He's tolerable. If I had to travel with Destiny, I'd have to fight an urge to shoot her or something.

    ... why do I always wanna shoot things? God, I should get that checked out.


    A few details aside, another great chapter. I laughed, witch is what I definitely needed. Even if your updates get spaced out I definitely appreciate the humor it brings.
    If you're doing a PM list throw me on there, I desire the knowledge of new chapters.
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  14. #14
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    bobandbill: Thanks for highlighting the mistakes. Seriously, I suck at checking over tenses. XD Will try to do better though. Also, glad you love that scene where Dawn sings. Me too! ^^

    Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix: Thanks too for highlighting the mistakes. XD

    ... *sigh* yyyyeeeppp, Guilty of this too. All my heroes in my last fic are based directly off in-game sprites. Fortunately, I'm using original designs this time, making me feel less bad about myself!
    I'm actually using a character design for one of my characters too, short of.... (*cough*NothingEverythingbanner*cough*)^O^;

    Lugia is win. In bird form.
    XD Oh yes.

    Lugia's story analysis is expert. How many other pokemon can completely analyze a story before it even happens?
    It's mostly with him being used in too many destiny stories...XD

    Again, thanks you two for the reviews! As for the next chapter...probably not until for a couple more weeks as this week and next week I'll be busy with quizzes, midterms, and will be changing majors. Man, will be very busy. O.o


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  15. #15
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    And I missed an update somehow. X_X Seeing as everyone else has already pointed out everything funny, I'll just do it again, shall I?

    Knowing that he was right, both teens nodded. The three were about to leave until they suddenly two objects wash ashore. They were two orbs, one blue and one pink. Destiny and Duku, curious what those things are, bend then and almost touch it until Damon screamed.
    *facepalm*

    All of a sudden Destiny began strutting and then was singing very energetically. Everyone glared at her in confusion.

    “My Pokemon brings all the boys to the yard and they’re like, wanna trade cards? Damn right, I wanna trade cards! I can beat you, I’ve got Charizard!”
    XD I like that avatar too.

    “I think I already found my soulmate?”

    One of Damon’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me?”

    Destiny pointed to a green haired boy with his long sleeve button shirt moving gently from the breeze. While his hands were brushing the sand off from his brown pants, his dull colored eyes showed of tragedy and no happiness in his life.

    “Wait, you mean you think that emo kid is your soulmate?”
    At least I know where that cliche is from.

    “So you’re not Destiny Ketchum?”

    The girl shook her head. “No. My name’s Hikari and I’m waiting for Uxie to tell me more information about my destiny.”

    “So you’re already chosen?”

    The teenager grinned and nodded. All of a sudden, two different female voices was heard.

    “You’re waiting for Uxie? I’m waiting for Azelf while my two other companions wait for Uxie and Mespirt, though not here and instead at a cave somewhere.”
    Eh...lots of Chosen Ones everywhere. XD

    They then looked up and saw a huge bird Pokemon with hand-like wings staring at them.
    I don't think this was supposed to be funny, but it was.

    Yeah...shameless copy of their reviews over.

  16. #16
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    Oh snap, can't believe I missed a chapter. XD; Yeah, I think that's a sign that I need to go on the PM list. XP Anyway, I'm glad that I managed to catch up, because those two chapters, like the prologue before them, contained things that got a laugh out of me. Here now are those very things:

    “In some cases, yes. However, not all teenagers are more mature than ten year olds,” Suicune argued.
    Amen to that! X3

    I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more. I think I’m destined for something more…

    Too wrap up in her thoughts, Destiny suddenly crashed onto a glass door. In cartoon fashion, her body slowly slid down towards the ground.
    Someone just walking or running into something like that will very often make me laugh, just as this did. XD

    “Don’t worry, Eevee will evolve in no time, because I’m going to be really nice and never abuse it, EVER!”
    That's pretty darned funny, considering that not only did she huggle that poor thing so hard earlier that its life might well have flashed before its eyes, she also went and inflicted abuse of sorts on its poor ears there. XP

    THAT’S IT! YOU’RE MY RIVAL NOW!
    That made me laugh, too. XD

    “And Destiny, I think we’ll battle together eventually.”

    “But how about now?” Destiny demanded in a whining voice.

    “Nah. More original that way to wait for the rival and protagonist to battle each other at the end than have them battle at the beginning and then rinse and repeat. Until then, ta-ta.”
    As did that. XD

    CHAPTER TWO:
    FIRST FOOTSTEPS! GENERIC DESIGN, CRUSHES AND CHOSEN ONES!

    Another title that got a laugh out of me. XD

    After hearing that, the girl turned around and stared at Lugia in a confused look. “Excuse me, I think you got the wrong girl.”

    Lugia titled his head and glared at her as if he was told he was in a different region.

    “So you’re not Destiny Ketchum?”

    The girl shook her head. “No. My name’s Hikari and I’m waiting for Uxie to tell me more information about my destiny.”
    Lugia making that big, loud declaration to the wrong girl was pretty amusing. XD

    All of a sudden, two different female voices was heard.

    “You’re waiting for Uxie? I’m waiting for Azelf while my two other companions wait for Uxie and Mespirt, though not here and instead at a cave somewhere.”

    “I’m actually chosen by Giratina and I’ll be meeting him at Iron Island.”

    Lugia turned around and saw two teenage girls coming, both look exactly like Hikari. When he saw Hikari and the two other Chosen Ones side by side and staring at him, he felt his head was about to explode.
    Also amusing was the appearance of a whole bunch of identical Chosen Ones in one place. XD

    The flames soon started to faded and then both Duku and Destiny fell down, both their bodies not having any burns. How could that happen when Dialga was burned back to death in the prologue?
    XD
    Last edited by Sike Saner; 23rd May 2008 at 7:56 AM.
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  17. #17
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    Happy Memorial Day to everyone in the United States! To celebrate this great holiday, I have a new chapter! ^^ Before we get to the chapter, a few things. First, again I’m now doing a PM List so let me know either in your reviews or comment in my visitor profile thingy. Another thing is I tried my best to dealt with tenses, so I hope there’s not too many mistakes. ^^; Next, replies:

    duncan:
    XD I like that avatar too.
    Yeah, that avatar is just really awesome. And to let you know, my Charizard can beat your Blaziken. XD

    Eh...lots of Chosen Ones everywhere. XD
    Seems to be, yes. =O

    Sike Saner:

    That's pretty darned funny, considering that not only did she huggle that poor thing so hard earlier that its life might well have flashed before its eyes, she also went and inflicted abuse of sorts on its poor ears there. XP
    Yeah, poor Eevee. ;_;

    Another title that got a laugh out of me. XD
    You probably figured out already that each chapter titles says what’s the chapter’s going to be about. ^^

    Again, thanks you two for the reviews and commenting on what your guys’ favorite parts are! ^^

    Okay, everyone…are you ready, ready, ready, ready, ready, for a new chapta?

    CHAPTER THREE:
    FIRST CITY! OF DETAILS AND EVIL TEAMS

    ///Muahhaaaaaaaaa…///

    Inside a dark room, a man with spiky silver hair and wearing a uniform that looks like a spacesuit was writing something. Could it be an outline of his great scheme? Who knows. He suddenly stopped and glared at what he wrote, one part made him gasped. .

    Plan: Get Destiny Ketchum.

    He was not sure how in the world he came up that name. For some reason though, he felt the urge to find and get that girl fast. The man believed she would soon be a threat to his crime syndicated organization.

    No one messes with Cyrus and Team Galactic.

    How Cyrus started out Team Galactic was a mystery. His past was also not much known. There were a few stories of how he spent too much time with machines and robots, thus led him to hating emotions. At least a Smeargle did not drain his brain, that was for sure.

    Cyrus began to chuckle, which then turned to one of those cheesy villain laughs from some cartoons to indicate they are indeed, evil.

    “MUAHAAAAAAAAAAA!”

    The evil laugh not only filled his small office but his hideout place too.

    +++

    After the three teenagers found out the prophecy predicted by the late Dialga and returned their Pokémon in their pokéballs, they took Route 202 towards their destination to their first city of the journey, Jubilife City. Nothing worthwhile happened at Route 202 (no Pokémon came out sadly), so already they made it to the city in only a couple of days.

    The three teenagers gave out amazed gasps and screams when they laid eyes on that city. There were many tall glass structured buildings like the Jubilife TV Station and the PokéTech Company. Many people and Pokémon were walking together and enjoying each ones’ company. Seems like everything was in harmony until…

    “HEY! GET OUT OF MY WAY!”

    “I know that voice! It’s Professor Rowan!” exclaimed Destiny.

    “Professor Rowan?” asked Damon. “Why he’s here in the first place? Also, aren’t we suppose to be the ones here first, not him?”

    Duku just shrugged and then answered, “It doesn’t matter. What’s important now is we must save him!”

    Both Damon and Destiny nodded and then the three rushed towards the source of the noise. It did not take long for them to come and saw two blue-green haired people in uniforms, which look like spacesuits, harassing Professor Rowan. No, not that kind of harassment. This is a PG-13 story for goodness sakes. Instead, they kept pushing him back and forth and trying to grab the briefcase, but the professor used it to whack them a couple of times. With faces being bruised, they glared at him with clenched hands.

    “Give us that briefcase! We know you have some very important information in there!” demanded one of them. He then pushed the old man down to the ground.

    “Yeah, give us that briefcase!” demanded the other, but this one it was a female one. Unusual both look the same but are different genders, huh?

    “Never!” screamed Professor Rowan while getting up. “Whatever’s in this briefcase is none of your business!”

    “Yeah, because we’ll fight you if you harass him any further!” yelled Destiny in a very heroic manner, pointing her fingers at them.

    Everyone turned and saw the three teenagers glaring at them and already had their pokéballs on their hands.

    “And who are you guys?” asked the female grunt.

    “We’re Destiny, Duku, and Damon, and we’ll defeat you!” exclaimed Damon.

    “Huh, just a couple of punks. We can defeat them, right?”

    The female grunt nodded and then both of them threw their pokéballs. After the pokéballs cracked open, one revealed a gray cat with a springy tail and another one a purple skunk with puffy cheeks and a white streak on his forehead running through to its fluffy tail.

    “All right, let’s get this battle started!” proclaimed Damon.

    All three threw their pokéballs and then Turtwig, Eevee, and a Pokémon Damon and Destiny suddenly gasped at. He was a small monkey with brown fur and a flaming tail. The fire type’s huge eyes went wide and then he titled his head.

    “It’s a Chimchar,” Duku answered. Destiny and Damon still stared at the Pokémon with squinted eyes, but then they shook their heads.

    “Damon, you watch out for Professor Rowan. Duku and I will take care of these two Pokemon.”

    Damon’s jaws dropped. He thought this would be his first battle, but that chance would soon be lost.

    “What? Why?”

    “For now only two is needed and I think our Pokémon could take care of those guys better.”

    The boy’s mouth was about to open, but then he closed them and sighed. Damon decided protesting would probably lead him in not joining on the journey with them. Plus, he wanted to still be with Destiny…even if he would have to stay with Duku. True, he does not know Duku very well yet but predicted he would steal Destiny from her, thus he believed it was right for him to call the quiet teenager a jerk. However, why he was not doing anything about it, not making Duku leave the group?

    Too wrapped up on those thoughts, Damon gasped when he already saw Glameow and Stunky fainted, full of scratches and bruises. Eevee and Chimchar, however, were left unharmed. After the two grunts returned their Pokémon, the female one pointed her fingers at them.

    “This isn’t the last you’ll see of Team Galactic!”

    The two Team Galactic grunts then ran off, dust picking up. Everyone just stared at them in confusion but then Professor Rowan chuckled.

    “Oh, hey you three. So glad you guys came, and at the right time too.”

    “Wait, Professor. How did you get here before us? Also, why you’re here?” asked Damon.

    “Oh, I used a flying Pokémon to come here. Also, let’s just say I’m here for something important. And to Destiny, told you this is not going to be the last time you’ll see me.” He said that last sentence with a wink.

    Destiny just gave an uneasy laugh. All of a sudden, a huge man in hitchhiker clothes and wearing a hat came in with color pencils and a drawing notebook. He panted a few times and then wiped the sweat off his forehead.

    “Sorry to intrude but I can’t help but saw you two battle with magnificent skills.”

    Damon’s jaws dropped again.

    Magnificent skills? I didn’t even get to see it!

    Destiny blushed. Duku, on the other hand, just smiled uneasily. He was not too sure how to react. He thought it was a nice compliment, but it was his first battle and he felt weird being praised already. It was as if something already made him a change man. He then frowned.

    Oh no. I’m still a quiet boy with a tragic life and am surprised I did my first battle.

    All three teenagers’ thoughts were interrupted when the mysterious man continued speaking.

    “Anyways, my name’s Jack and I’m an employee at Jubilife TV. I come and draw pictures of great trainers in the making. I want your guys’ permission if the both of you would come with me and I can draw Eevee and Chimchar over at my workplace.”

    “Sure!” Destiny squealed.

    Duku shrugged and then said, “That’s cool.”

    “Great! All right, to my place then!”

    +++

    Inside the second floor of the Jubilife TV building, the professor, the three teenagers, and their Pokémon were inside a brightly lit room with horizontal stripes on the walls and flowing green curtains. Jack was sharpening his colored pencils, and after he finished that task, he smiled.

    “Okay Destiny and Duku, how would you like your Pokémon to be drawn?”

    As everyone stared at the man’s drawing pad, he first wrote two names:

    Chimchar

    Eevee

    “I think that’s enough!” Damon insisted. “I think people will already know what those Pokémon look like.”

    “No, I don’t think so,” Professor Rowan informed. “What if someone thinks a Chimchar is a lizard with a fire tip tail and an Eevee a Digimon? Jack, maybe do a black and white sketch of them.”

    James nodded and then sketched Eevee and Chimchar.

    “I think that should be good,” Professor Rowan praised with a smile.

    “Hold on, not yet!” protested Destiny. “There should be color! What if someone will confuse an Eevee with a Vulpix? Also, that would probably make someone think that Pokémon is a shiny, and everyone hates it when someone has a shiny.”

    “I don’t think anyone will confuse the Pokémon,” Duku countered. “Pretty much everyone here will know what kind of species an Eevee is, even without color.” He then began pointing at the various black and white sketches. “See, that’s a Poliwag, that’s a Hypno, that’s an Arcanine, and that’s a Porygon.”

    “Well, you may know those Pokémon, but what if someone else doesn’t.”

    Duku chuckled. “I doubt so.”

    Destiny felt her heart pounding faster and faster. For a second she thought steam came out from her ears.

    “Can too!”

    “Cannot!”

    “Can too!”

    “Cannot!”

    “Can too!”

    Eyes twitching and feeling like he was having a headache, Jack shouted, “Okay, ENOUGH! Am tired of the argument on how much detail I should put on the Pokémon. I’ll just leave the picture like this and that’s that!”

    James did as he said as he just pinned the drawn pictures of Eevee and Chimchar on the wall. Damon, Professor Rowan, and the two Pokémon sighed in relief while Duku and Destiny glared at each other at first and then turned their backs from each other.

    “Something tells me those two will fall for each other someday,” Professor Rowan whispered with a chuckle.

    “Of course they will,” Damon whined with his head down.

    +++

    Back at Cyrus’ office…

    “What? Two teenagers starting on their journey beat you guys?”

    “Yeah, and it was over just like that. It was as if no one else saw it,” answered a female voice.

    Cyrus sighed and shook his head. Already he was embarrassed his team members were beaten by teenagers starting their journey.

    “Looks like they’re hot on our trail. For now, try to keep an eye on them.”

    “Yes, sir.”

    After the female grunt hung up, Cyrus closed his cell phone. He began massaging his forehead..

    They had beaten my grunts. They should have just shot them or something. That would mean though this story won’t be epic and a waste of time.

    In an instant though, he grinned.

    Oh, I’ll get them for sure.

    Once again Cyrus began laughing in a cheesy manner.

    +++

    A couple of things.

    -One joke “At least a Smeargle didn’t drain his brain,” is actually a joke made by Sike Saner on one discussion about Cyrus. XD

    -The scene with Jack not sure how much detail he should put on the Pokémon is inspired by an old discussion of how much detail a Pokémon should have.

    -The villain laugh is inspired by a discussion on villains in another forum, muhaaaaaaaaa. =D I’m fine with villains laughing but there has been a few that laughed very cheesy. XD

    Hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Next chapter shall come in late June, after school is over. ^^


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  18. #18
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    Well, this is certainly an interesting read-I don't believe I've read a Pokemon parody before, only the Naruto ones at ff.net. This is quite good though, and I expect it to be very interesting.

    To make the prologue even more exciting, it was a few hundred years before the event of those two teenagers dueling out came about. There was a huge war going on in the Orre region because of endless bragging between the people of Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, and Sinnoh that their region was better. The war took place over there because none of the leaders want their region to be destroyed.
    Which of course explains why Orre looks like a nuclear testing ground.

    The battle was coming to its climax, like all the beginnings in movies, stories, games, and other media that started out with battles. So far everything was in chaos. Underneath the clouded sky there were men sending flames that flew high, catapults throwing spam, trolls beating some of the soldiers to death or making them cry, and many hacked Kygore and Mewtwo going against each other until one got destroyed. There were legendaries participating the battle, but many Celebi and Mew looking like half finished clones would say otherwise.
    The current state of the Pokemon forums, I assume?

    “Just hope he’ll be fine and not be splattered by spam again like five hundred years ago,” Suicune answered.
    The fact that a bird-which usually does the splattering of poop-getting hit by poop is ironic.

    The sun rose up to light up Twinleaf Town. There was nothing much but a few houses and one small pond everyone went to check their reflections to pity themselves or to hide some secrets down there. Everything was quiet and peaceful, saved for one house.

    ‘DAMN IT! I’M LATE! ALSO, STUPID LAB AT ANOTHER TOWN A COUPLE OF MILES AWAY!”
    Seems like the second sentence in the first paragraph could be one of those pesky run-ons. Try a comma right here:

    There was nothing much but a few houses and one small pond everyone went to check their reflections to pity themselves,or to hide some secrets down there.
    However, since this is a parody, I'm not sure how serious you are about grammer. Thought I'd point that out though.

    “No thanks,” Destiny answered while petting her Eevee. “I’m actually thinking of evolving it to Espeon.”
    Professor Rowan’s eyes went wide at that comment. He then shook his head and laughed.
    Destiny, it's impossible to evolve something if you killed it. ^_^

    Bolded the part that should be added to keep it sounding good.

    That's all for now, I guess. It looks good so far, so let me know when a new chapter comes out.

  19. #19

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    They had beaten my grunts. They should have just shot them or something. That would mean though this story won’t be epic and a waste of time.
    *snrk*

    Wow, that was exactly what the doctor ordered. I've been so down lately I needed a good comedy to bring me back up.

    Damon’s jaws dropped again.

    Magnificent skills? I didn’t even get to see it!
    I liked the on going "Nobody even saw it!" bit. It would probly explain why people keep going on when you battle in city streets: No one sees them because you lapse into the alternate plane of existance known as the battle screen.
    or somthing.


    No, not that kind of harassment. This is a PG-13 story for goodness sakes.
    That thought didn't even cross my mind untill you said that's NOT what it was.

    Plan: Get Destiny Ketchum.

    He was not sure how in the world he came up that name. For some reason though, he felt the urge to find and get that girl fast. The man believed she would soon be a threat to his crime syndicated organization.
    I name all my plans "Get Destiny Ketchum" It confuses people when I say "Now I will activate Plan: Get Destiny Ketchum!" They don't know what's going to happen!

    “Yeah, give us that briefcase!” demanded the other, but this one it was a female one. Unusual both look the same but are different genders, huh?
    Team Galatic just looks like a bunch of robots. What was their big disign diffrence between males and females? A Skirt?


    Nuts. I noticed one mistake but I don't remember where. I'll continue this quote fest when I return.. later!
    Hooray for college
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    Haha, nice chapter. Seemed a bit short, but it was fine with me. Means I get to make a short review, doesn't it?

    Both Damon and Destiny nodded and then the three rushed towards the source of the noise. It did not take long for them to come and saw two blue-green haired people in uniforms, which look like spacesuits, harassing Professor Rowan. No, not that kind of harassment. This is a PG-13 story for goodness sakes. Instead, they kept pushing him back and forth and trying to grab the briefcase, but the professor used it to whack them a couple of times. With faces being bruised, they glared at him with clenched hands.
    The idea of an old man beating off a couple of young thugs with a briefcase brought a smile to my face. XD

    Too wrapped up on those thoughts, Damon gasped when he already saw Glameow and Stunky fainted, full of scratches and bruises. Eevee and Chimchar, however, were left unharmed. After the two grunts returned their Pokémon, the female one pointed her fingers at them.

    “This isn’t the last you’ll see of Team Galactic!”

    The two Team Galactic grunts then ran off, dust picking up. Everyone just stared at them in confusion but then Professor Rowan chuckled.

    “Oh, hey you three. So glad you guys came, and at the right time too.”
    XD Nice.

    You know, I've been thinking and I've had an idea to spice this fic up some more. Spam. Seriously, you need some more spam catapults and such. :0

    Wow, this is the shortest review I've done in a while. Sorry, I just don't want to fill up space quoting the same things other people have, you know? Nice chapter.

  21. #21
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    Nice job again. Quite funny, if seemingly a little too short for my liking - I wanted MOAR MUDKIPS-eh, CHAPTER!
    Anyway, it seems that you have improved over your problems with tenses. Too bad there were other mistakes.

    He suddenly stopped and glared at what he wrote, one part made him gasped. .
    I question the random second full stop there.
    How Cyrus started out Team Galactic was a mystery. His past was also not much known. There were a few stories of how he spent too much time with machines and robots, thus led him to hating emotions. At least a Smeargle did not drain his brain, that was for sure.
    *cough mention to people in sunnyshore city who say such things cough*. Amusing.

    Liked a few 'fourth-wall-broken-by-narrator' moments you had, such as this one:
    It did not take long for them to come and saw two blue-green haired people in uniforms, which look like spacesuits, harassing Professor Rowan. No, not that kind of harassment. This is a PG-13 story for goodness sakes.
    And this:
    Unusual both look the same but are different genders, huh?
    Nice work - preferred the first one though.
    He was a small monkey with brown fur and a flaming tail. The fire type’s huge eyes went wide and then he titled his head.

    “It’s a Chimchar,” Duku answered.
    Just felt like quoting this, and saying that I half hoped that you might have used a 'spammy' moment and have them shout 'EVIL FIRE MONKEY!'. Yeah, that's what me and my friends called it for a long while. In fact, scrap that - I claim that joke in the very minor case I ever use it or write a fic in Sinnoh.

    Chimchar

    Eevee
    “I think that’s enough!” Damon insisted. “I think people will already know what those Pokémon look like.”

    “No, I don’t think so,” Professor Rowan informed. “What if someone thinks a Chimchar is a lizard with a fire tip tail and an Eevee a Digimon? Jack, maybe do a black and white sketch of them.”
    Heh, caugth what that was referring to stright away. Nice, liked that argument. Heh: 'no, a name is enough! Never mind that it's a drawing!'. Also lol'd at that 'what if someone thinks... an Eevee (is) a Digimon?' Win, 'nuff said.

    “There should be color!
    For some reason I really feel it needs the word 'some' before colour, (or color, silly American spelling...), even though it isn't really required...
    Am tired of the argument on how much detail I should put on the Pokémon.
    Suggest 'I am', rather than just 'Am'.
    They had beaten my grunts. They should have just shot them or something. That would mean though this story won’t be epic and a waste of time.
    A thought I have thought about before - shooting does the job better than forcing creatures to fight other creatures.

    Overall good job - but felt a bit too short. Aw well, still enjoyable. Keep it up!

    A parody of the Pokemon Colosseum game, full of pastries and Miror B.
    Completed. Four times winner of Best Comedy/Funniest Fic.

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  22. #22
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    xXPorygonxX: Hehe, a new reader. Hi! =D

    The current state of the Pokemon forums, I assume?
    For the most part, yes. (nods)

    Sure, I'll let you know when the next chapter comes. You want to be on my PM list or let you know via Visitor Messages?


    Destiny, it's impossible to evolve something if you killed it. ^_^
    XD So true.

    As for grammar, I'm serious about the grammar issues, but not as serious as my other fic "Nothing, Everything." Hence, why I have a beta for that story and not this one...^^; I still try to edit as many mistakes as possible, though, hehe.

    Wandering Rhythmical Phoenix:
    I name all my plans "Get Destiny Ketchum" It confuses people when I say "Now I will activate Plan: Get Destiny Ketchum!" They don't know what's going to happen!
    Wait, you actually say that in real life? XD

    duncan:

    Yeah, old men beating young thugs for the win! =D

    You know, I've been thinking and I've had an idea to spice this fic up some more. Spam. Seriously, you need some more spam catapults and such. :0
    Here, this whole reply is meant for bumping, thus this is spam. This is what you want, right? XD Oh wait...you want them spam catapults, huh? Hm, I might add a couple more next chapter. ;D

    bobandbill: Sorry for the shortness of this chapter...not much going on at Jubilife City. That Global Trading building wasn't open yet. =O

    Just felt like quoting this, and saying that I half hoped that you might have used a 'spammy' moment and have them shout 'EVIL FIRE MONKEY!'. Yeah, that's what me and my friends called it for a long while. In fact, scrap that - I claim that joke in the very minor case I ever use it or write a fic in Sinnoh.
    I actually have a one shot called "Forever Young" (which I'll rewrite...eventually) and I have the main character called that Pokemon "Fire Butt Monkey." XD

    Heh, caugth what that was referring to stright away. Nice, liked that argument. Heh: 'no, a name is enough! Never mind that it's a drawing!'. Also lol'd at that 'what if someone thinks... an Eevee (is) a Digimon?' Win, 'nuff said.
    Glad you like it. Seriously, I too laugh at that part whenever I reread the chapter to check over some mistakes. XD

    A thought I have thought about before - shooting does the job better than forcing creatures to fight other creatures.
    Yeah. OT fics needs more guns. XD Kidding, kidding! (doesn't want to get sued :X)

    Anyways everyone, thanks for your reviews! Expect the next chapter to be on Father's Day. Yep, that's right, the next chapter will be a Father's Day special one (sort of).
    Last edited by Bay; 5th June 2008 at 8:03 AM.


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    How Cyrus started out Team Galactic was a mystery. His past was also not much known. There were a few stories of how he spent too much time with machines and robots, thus led him to hating emotions. At least a Smeargle did not drain his brain, that was for sure.
    Actually seeing that staring back at me from the text put a big, silly grin on my face.

    It did not take long for them to come and saw two blue-green haired people in uniforms, which look like spacesuits, harassing Professor Rowan. No, not that kind of harassment. This is a PG-13 story for goodness sakes.
    LMAO! XD

    “What? Two teenagers starting on their journey beat you guys?”

    “Yeah, and it was over just like that. It was as if no one else saw it,” answered a female voice.
    Indeed. X3


    I liked the "undescribed battle" jokes in that chapter, such as the one that I just quoted. I also liked the references to the debate over how much description of a Pokémon is necessary. And again, the "harassment" joke was priceless. XD That might very well be my new favorite joke in this fic so far, in fact. ^^
    DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK
    (Or do. I don't actually mind.)
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    Sike Saner: Hehe, yeah that was the time when I told you about my initial idea of a Cyrus centered one-shot for the Requiem contest, which sadly I didn't even finish the planning stages of it. However, after watching this anime called "Chobits", I finally got an idea how I can do a story about him, and I might use that on the upcoming Sci-Fi/Fantasty contest. =D And yeah, really love that harassment joke too. XD

    Thanks for your review! ^^


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  25. #25
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    Before I proceed, I have something serious to say. Now, many people here heard how Mix stopped her fic “Destiny’s Journeys ”and such. The reason I mention this is because I’m afraid maybe there might be a couple people think the rest of this story issuddenly inspired by what Mix put at the end. I’ll say this: the rest of this fic won’t be inspired by the rest of the plot of DJ Mix explained. In fact, I actually had finished this fic a couple months ago, but now it’s in the editing stages. True there are times I do make last minute changes, but I swear the rest of this parody is not inspired by what Mix posted. In fact, some of the last minute changes is more due to recent debates at Serebii that inspired more ideas for this fic.

    Okay, with that out of the way, here’s Chapter Four, the somewhat Father’s Day Special! ^^ Also, I’ve tried my best to get the grammar mistakes out of the way and even tried to say it outloud to myself, but there could still be a few silly ones, so that’s fine if you guys can catch them (yes, I’ve read your review of NE, duncan! XD). ^^;

    CHAPTER FOUR
    OREBURGH GATE! OF FIRST CATCHES, UNDERUSED AND OVERUSED POKEMON, AND DESTINY POWERS

    That same night, everyone settled in at the Pokémon Center. Inside their room, both Duku and Damon were sleeping while Destiny made a phone call. Her eyes were becoming sleepy from staring at the screen for quite some time.

    “Come on, Dad. Please pick up!”

    Finally, the screen lit up and revealed a man with messy black hair and zig zags on his cheeks. He stared while his eyes were blinking.

    “Who’s this?”

    Destiny squinted her eyes. “Um, it’s me, Desitny, your daughter!”

    At first Ash still gazed on with confusion, but then he chuckled.

    “Oh, Destiny! Sorry hun, almost forgot I had one. You and your mother know I can be clueless sometimes.”

    Destiny shook her head and sighed. “Anyways Dad, want to say that today I entered Jubilife City and tomorrow I’ll be going to Oreburgh Gate.”

    Ash grinned. “That sounds cool. You know, I’m proud of you. First, you graduated first in your class and now you’re beginning your journey. I remember on my journey it only took me a couple of days to travel from my hometown to the closest city.”

    Destiny felt her cheeks burning. She rubbed her head and laughed.

    “Well, glad to hear that. Just want to let you know how I’m doing. I’ll talk to you again later!”

    Ash smiled. “Can’t wait.”

    After the screen turned black, Destiny sighed and her shoulders slumped down.

    “Wonder how long Oreburgh City is from here,” Destiny muttered.

    +++

    Next day our heroes went inside Oreburgh Gate, a small cave trainers must past in order to enter Oreburgh City. They are trying to find a couple of Pokemon to put in their team and very vital if they were to go against the gym leader of Oreburgh City. So far, nothing.

    “Urgh, how many hours have we been in this cave?” complained Dawn while taking deep breathes.

    “Four hours,” answered Duku. He too was panting.

    “Seriously, I’m getting bored. Why don’t we just go to Oreburgh City and then try again tomorrow?” Damon asked.

    After Destiny took a few more deep breathes, she grinned.

    “Good idea. Should we do this, Duku? Duku?”

    When Destiny saw Duku, he did not look at her back. Instead, he looked down, deep in thought. He felt a little dizzy, however.

    Already I‘m having doubts about this journey. Many things happened. I was wash ashore, found out I’m one of the Chosen Ones, beaten Team Galactic, and fought with Destiny many, many times alreaady.”

    “Duku? Are you all right?”

    All of a sudden, Duku gazed back at Destiny with a confused look.

    “Huh? Yeah, I’m okay.”

    “Doesn’t seem like it. You look very sick. Are you sure your parents say you need fresh air?”

    “Of course!” Duku snapped. “Gosh, do you ever listen?”

    “Well, I was just wondering,” Destiny apologized, though in an angry tone.

    Nervous the argument would be even more heated, Damon whistled and then the two teenagers turned around.

    “You know what, I’ve a better idea. Let’s try to find some other Pokémon in that other room and then we can retire for the night if we don’t find any.”

    Already Destiny and Duku nodded. After Damon chuckled, the three went to the next room.

    +++

    When the three were inside the next room, there was not much difference except for a huge pond. For an hour now, they still had not found anything.

    “Seriously, this is getting tedious. Urgh, maybe we’ve better luck tomorrow,” Destiny mourned and then her head was down.

    Seriously, this is not going the way I wanted to go. I‘m suppose to be having good luck! I‘m one of the Chosen Ones, damn it!

    Her thoughts were interrupted when Damon asked a question to everyone.

    “Hey guys, something suddenly came to my mind. All right, pretty soon we’ll have a full team, right?”

    Both teens nodded.

    “I’m curious. What are your guys’ stances of underused and overused Pokémon?”

    “Excuse me?” Duku asked.

    “Well, from many years watching Pokémon Championships, there are certain Pokémon being used more than others. And here’s two of the overused ones.”

    “Huh?” asked both Destiny and Duku with wide eyes.

    The two then turned around and saw a long haired girl wearing a short dress with an orange lizard swishing his fire tip tail. A red colored fox-like Pokémon with a yellow tail and fur around his neck was tailing behind.

    “Char!” Charmander cheered.

    “Eon!” Flareon whined.

    “Don’t worry, you guys. We’ll get a Pokémon here somewhere. Looks like there’s only going to be water Pokémon, though. Come on, let’s go back and keep searching.”

    The three then left the room, just like that.

    “Huh, that’s kind of random,” Duku pointed out.

    Ignoring that comment, Damon coughed. “Anyways, what do you guys think about the concept of overused and underused Pokémon?”

    “I think it’s better to use overuse Pokémon. Like seriously, that would make other trainers like you!” Destiny answered.

    “Underused Pokémon for me. I’m tired of seeing everyone on television using Absol and Grovyle, as those two are really common for trainers back at Hoenn.”

    “OU!” Destiny protested.

    “UU!” Duku argued back.

    “OU!”

    “UU!”

    “OU!”

    “UU!”

    Annoyed at their bickering, Damon whistled to bring their attention back to him once again.

    “Seriously, you guys sound stupid saying the initials. Well, I think there is no sure thing as overused and underused Pokémon. Any trainer can use any Pokémon he or she likes and as long as they take good care of it.”

    “If you think that way, why you asked?” Duku questioned.

    “Just wanted to know if you guys do believe in underused and overused Pokémon,” Damon explained with a chuckle.

    Destiny just grunted. “Okay, enough about underused and overused Pokémon. I think we looked inside this cave long enough, so I… oh my gosh!”

    “What is it, Destiny?” Damon asked.

    “I think I see a Pokémon, and a shiny one too!”

    “Where?” Duku asked.

    Destiny pointed to where a shiny Psyduck gazed at its own reflection. Its huge eyes were looking at its body in disgust, the same color as the pond. After hearing the echoes of a female voice, he slowly turned around to look at her.

    “Psy?” the Pokémon asked in confusion, his head titled to the right.

    “Hey Duku, would you consider it an underused Pokémon or an overused Pokémon?”

    Duku’s eyes went wide. His mouth opened, but then he closed them. He would hate it if he and Destiny argued again. After an unsure noise, he spoke.

    “Underused, I guessed. Don’t see too much trainers with it, most likely because of the stereotypical portrayal of it being stupid.”

    “Psy?” the shiny Pokémon asked again in confusion.

    “You know, it looks very sad and also it looks like it wants to be with you.”

    “Huh?”

    Duku bit his lips and then stared back at the Psyduck. That Pokémon wanted to be with him?

    “I hate to say it, but seems like Destiny’s right. Hey, you two are a match made in heaven!” Damon exclaimed with a smirk.

    Duku’s mind was still wrapped about the idea of that Psyduck wanting to be with him. However, he was not sure if he should trust them. He decided to ask.

    “Hey there little buddy, what did you say you join me?”

    In an instant, the Psyduck smiled.

    “Sure!” the shiny Psyduck answered.

    Duku’s eyes went wide. He just could not believe what he heard.

    “Wait, what? Also, you talk?”

    “Actually, it seems you can only understand me,” the Psyduck answered, as if he already knew Duku was the Chosen One.

    “Hey, I can understand you, too!” exclaimed Destiny, in tiptoes. her hands clasped together.

    “Then I guess the both of you are Chosen Ones. How sweet!” the Pokémon answered with a smile and then she turned to Duku. “So, you better catch me before I keep following you like that Jigglypuff that kept following Destiny’s dad.”

    Duku was at first startled by this but then smiled. He thought it was cool to have a shiny as a Pokémon and believe maybe his life was not tragic after all, for the most part.

    Maybe I’m cursed being a Chosen One and getting this shiny Psyduck, but it’s still cool to have a Pokémon as a shiny. Every trainer in Sinnoh’ll admire me, possibly around the world! Maybe that will cure my depression!

    Quickly, he grabbed a pokéball and threw it at the Pokémon. When the ball hit the ground, there was already a ping sound. Duku picked it up and grinned.

    “All right! I caught a Psyduck!”

    Destiny grinned. “Congrats on catching your Pokémon!”

    Damon frowned, felt a bit uneasy about it, though. He thought Duku was going to ditch that Pokémon and let him sulk about his shiny body forever. Things changed though when Duku caught it.

    Great, now people will either praise him or throw spam at him. Actually, I would like that. Still, Destiny thought it’s cool. Maybe I should get myself a shiny Pokémon too and she’ll probably like me.

    +++

    Decided to retire for the night, the three got out of the cave and were only a few hundred feet away from the city until Destiny heard whimpering.

    “Shin…shin…in.”

    After she gasped, Destiny turned around and saw an injured Shinx. The lion Pokémon’s blue and black body was filled with scratches.

    ‘Oh, my gosh, it’s hurt! I’m going to take it to the Pokémon Center!”

    “Wait, Destiny! Be careful with it! Maybe it’s best to put it in a pokéball!” Damon warned.

    Destiny touched Shinx gently, but the Pokémon yelped in pain. The girl’s eyes widen.

    “Sorry, little guy. Look, we need to take you to the Poké…”

    Destiny stopped and gasped when she suddenly saw her hands glowing blue. At first Shinx yelped even more in pain but then when the glow faded, he cheered and licked Destiny’s face. The girl’s eyes widen when all of her scratches were gone.

    “Did I just heal it?” Destiny stuttered.

    Duku and Damon did not answer. Their mouths were left open the whole time. Not too far from them, a shadowed figure behind a tree watched the whole thing and then laughed.

    “So it’s those Chosen One kids I heard about,” the figure whispered. The voice was feminine and scratchy. “Tomorrow they’ll be in for a big surprise.”

    +++

    A few things:

    -One part of Ash saying Destiny is the top of her class is of how in many fics the main character tends to be the one graduating as valedictorian or scored the highest on the tests. I actually did that mistake in “Nothing, Everything,” my main character top of her class…though she is very obsessive with history. That really still doesn’t make it right, though. ^.^;
    -The OU/UU debate is from this old discussion about whether it’s right or wrong to be using OU/UU Pokemon and which is better.
    -The last part in which Destiny heals Shinx is of how there always seems to be trainers who gives the Pokemon to Nurse Joy to heal and then the Pokemon actually then likes the trainer instantly. The thing with that is…let’s just say I’m one of those people that believe sometimes it takes a while for Pokemon and humans to bond. :P

    Next chapter shall come in a couple of weeks. Also, now that summer’s here, a chapter shall come every couple of weeks. ^^


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