Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: Serial (One-Shot, horror/gore) Rated R

Threaded View

Previous Post Previous Post   Next Post Next Post
  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2006
    A therapist's Sofa


    Well, this is the first fic that I actually want to post here and I don't expect anyone reading this and subsequently reviewing to sugar coat anything they say. I expect hardcore, full-frontal reviewing from you guys (Sorry for the misleading innuendo)

    Again, warnings as the following scenes contain gore and mutilation. Not safe for younger audiences. All though, none of the following scenes contain flashing images, so read on epileptics your safe here.

    Without further stalling here it is. *Cringes in anticipation of bad feedback*


    By Diddy

    I see her.

    I’ve been watching her for weeks now.

    I know her routine.

    I know what she does when she’s alone at night.

    And I know when she’s most vulnerable.

    ~ ~ ~

    On a Wednesday evening, one Anne Pretloe goes out into the forest near her dwelling and picks wild mushrooms, she finds enjoyment in this as she always makes stuffed mushrooms the next day, sometimes inviting friends over to revel in her culinary skills.

    However, tomorrow night, her friends will be disappointed. There will be no invitation, no stuffed mushrooms and no Anne Pretloe.

    It was autumn time, the trees had surrendered their leaves, letting the oranges, reds and browns coat the ground, making walking a quite loud affair. The trees that had surrendered said leaves were left barren, mere skeletal forms of what they used to be.

    A dead forest.

    The time was 11:49pm; Anne always said that this was the best time to pick mushrooms. For me it was the best time to select my method. I had gone over the plan countless times in my head and had come to a crossroad, either option viable. Should I let my primal side take over and deal with the consequences later, or do I let my rational side win over and perform in the utmost discretion. That would come automatically when the moment best presented itself.

    ~ ~ ~

    The time had rolled to midnight and what a delight, this is the moment. The moon at its peak in the night sky, I approach. In a voice designed to be cold, emotionless but also one of trust…

    I spoke.

    “Why, I do believe you have picked some very nice mushrooms there.”

    I anticipated her reaction; the humble Kirlia turned quickly, her white skirt flowing gracefully as she moved and wide, frightened red eyes met fierce, intimidating red eyes.

    “Who are you? What are you doing? Sneaking up on me like that. Never-Do-That-To-Someone-In-The-Dark.” She spoke first of inquisitiveness and secondly of a fierce determination, stressing each word. Red eyes slowing matching mine in intensity.

    “Why, I’m so sorry child, I didn’t mean to startle you.” This I used to quickly gain an accord, while not trusting of me, she still knew I could be trusted. Along the line. Sadly the pen sketching her line had run out of ink, and the gods didn’t have time to get a new cartridge. “I’ll just let you get to your mushroom picking shall I?”

    “Well, I hope you’ve learnt your lesson.” Anne retorted, turning back around indignantly.

    Standing almost a full three feet above her, I extending the green sword on my right elbow soundlessly.

    It was then I decided.

    I would like to enjoy this to its maximum.

    It is said to be an utmost dishonour for a creature such as me to kill another member of my evolutionary tree. But since birth, despite being a creature so in tune with emotion, I felt nothing. I had no sense of honour, I had no sense of family and I had no emotion.

    This left me exiled as a young child, killing small creatures to feed my primal desire of hunger. Soon enough killing for food wasn’t enough. As I developed, my psychic abilities blossomed and I found new ways to ensnare my prey.

    Using these psychic abilities, I reached out my consciousness and touched upon Anne Pretloe’s mind. ‘Hmm, she has something else planned for these mushrooms rather than the usual stuffed variety.’ But it meant nothing, as she wouldn’t last the night. I probed further, past residual thoughts and memories until I happened upon motor function. The task of learning the complex junctions of the mind had been a long and arduous one, but one that had become very useful in fulfilling my animalistic needs. I promptly shut it down and she crumpled under her own weight.

    As she lay, motionless on the floor, I pondered, ‘was my decision of a rational approach correct?’ I dismissed that thought, of course it was. The cleaner this was, the harder it was for anyone to find out.

    Using my innate telekinesis, I lifted the body to a nearby branch and held it there, waiting for the blood to collect in her round, green head.

    Slowly the vivid green welcomed patches of red, until the rest of her body was as pale as the glowing orb miles above me.

    I glanced down at the blade attached to my elbow. “Well my old friend, its time to get to work.” Announced I happily.

    Utilizing the blade I made a deep incision horizontally across Anne Pretloe’s stomach, ‘perfect’ I thought, there was no blood, only a transparent fluid that oozed lazily from the wound dripping cautiously until it reached her chin and with the faintest crunching sound hit the heavily leaved forest floor. She had by this point lost consciousness, completely oblivious to the mutilation across her midriff, oozing that transparent fluid coating her torso.

    My control over her was absolute; I now made two more incisions either side of the first, the wounds making an ‘H’ in shape.

    H for hello internal organs.

    Using both blades I pulled the two pieces of flesh both upwards and downwards respectively, extending my telekinesis to hold them in place while I worked. I first extracted the small intestine, pulling the pink rope-like organ out of her body like an unopposed tug-of-war contestant. The darker large intestine came next, while considerably smaller in length; it was more voluminous and easier to grasp hold of. When the last of it was removed I dumped it next to the mushrooms as I did with the small intestine. Next was Anne’s bladder which with a few simple cuts, joined its fellow organs on the pile, just below that and required me to reach right in there was Ms. Pretloe’s reproductive organs, her ovaries, along with her uterus.

    The profuse amount of transparent liquid was now gathering underneath her floating corpse, lengthening the vertical incisions I continued to peel open her chest like one would do to a can of anchovies. With a quick snap of cartilage, I disposed of the bone structure designed to keep the vital organs safe. ‘They aren’t so safe anymore though are they?’ mused I focusing intently on the still beating heart. Keeping a determined smile on my face, I sliced the vena cava and the aorta, releasing it from its myogenic slavery.

    Taking Anne Pretloe’s heart in my hand, I stared, just stared as it struggled to beat, but suddenly failed, stopping outright.

    I lifted Ms. Pretloe’s heart to my nose smelling the flesh, that hypnotic odour, willing me to continue, to reach out my mouth and take a bite. So I indulged myself, starting with the expertly cut remains of the vena cava, I tore a chunk off. ‘How I had missed that taste.’ It was then my primal side kicked in. I took a larger bite, this time into the right atrium, blood smattered across my face and onto the wild mushrooms on the forest floor. ‘They would get a feast just as I am.’ My cravings for vascular flesh grew and grew until I had consumed the entire thing.

    Until next time, sweet nectar of life.

    Nature, being the only thing that had sustained me for the near entirety of my life, deserved some compensation.

    The offering of sustenance as it had always gifted me.

    I turned to my side and threw my right arm across my body, only for it to swing back with expert precision, across the face of Anne Pretloe. Blood, the crimson life giver, a profuse amount for such a trivial wound flew in all directions, most thrown to my right, resting in an arced line across the forest floor, becoming unnoticeable upon the leaves of similar colour. Some of it flew back at me onto my torso; with a finger on my left hand I gathered some of the crimson fluid onto the fingertip and drank, a feeling of euphoria as it slid slowly down my throat and into my awaiting stomach.

    Finally releasing my telekinetic grasp on Anne’s person, she crumpled to the floor again, but this time falling into her own internal transparent fluid. She was literally stewing in her own juices.

    And now I dispose of her corpse.

    Releasing the head from her shoulders was first priority, next was to remove both arms and finally both legs, biological constructs such as bone crumble like paper under the power of my blades. The internal organs, I was to leave in the place I killed Anne Pretloe, nature taking its course, bacteria will breakdown the organs until they are nothing more than nutrients to be reused as fertiliser for the surrounding trees and fungi. Like I do with all of my conquests, I mark the place of finality. An ‘x’ carved into the tree would suit perfectly.

    The body parts of Ms. Anne Pretloe were to be buried in her back garden in various places. One near her cabbage patch, two more near the carrot patch and the other two residing with her potatoes. Again, the decomposing flesh and muscle serving as fertiliser for plants that will now go unpicked, themselves rotting and feeding the earth.

    When all is done, I return to my place of residence. A small shack nearly four miles due west of Ms. Pretloe’s cabin. The walk there was filled with memories of the past hour, reliving how I had subdued, tortured, killed, partially ingested and disposed of a humble Kirlia, of whose name was Anne Pretloe.


    Again, tell me what you think. As I do have many more ideas with my anti-hero here.

    By the way, with the hints provided, did it give enough to reveal the identity of the main character? I'd just like to know if I succeeded on that point.
    Last edited by Diddy; 25th May 2008 at 10:34 PM.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts