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Thread: The Serebithian Crusade

  1. #1
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    Default The Serebithian Crusade

    The Serebithian Crusade

    Authors: ~Mist~ & Cap D. Blue
    Pairings: Member shippings, of course!
    Fandom: Original
    Genre: Adventure, Comedy, Romance, along with some Suspense & Drama.
    Rating: PG-13
    Disclaimer: All of the characters used are based on real people, meaning the members themselves. The idea belongs to us, but we have given the okay to everyone who wishes to be part of this. So basically, this story is ours.
    Summary: One shipper was living in the present until discovering a mysterious book that suddenly transported her to the times of the Crusades; she realized that all the shipping wars that happened online have come to life in this once in a lifetime journey.

    Notes: Yes, finally! It’s here! *jumps up & down with excitement* Cap D. Blue & I are anxious as hell about this one. The idea was introduced by me since I was having strange dreams weeks ago along with playing a ton of Brawl that inspired this to come into play, and Blue-kun offered to help me out with this one. This story is an original, focusing our views on the very members who roam the Shippers Community. I first introduced the idea as a joke in a thread some time ago, telling how the ship wars would come to life in my dreams, and so, it’s going to be made reality… well, on here. xD

    So then I began to develop this idea, wanting to turn it into a fanfiction much like PokeProphet’s fic back in 2005. I started making a googlepage site, wondering if anyone was interested in the story. We have a total of 12 applications from members so far, so I’m hoping we can attract more people later on. I’m really hoping people will like this story. I hope that it’ll be a hit or at least liked by the shippers themselves.

    And so we have our first chapter. I’d like to say a big thank you to Mel-Girl & darkwithrobots who kindly offered to be the roles of our two narrators, along with everyone who applied! I wrote the first part of this chapter while Cap D. Blue wrote the second part of the chapter. The pattern may change so we’re still trying this out.

    Reviews are greatly appreciated! I’ll be having some extra info on the site in case of confusion but will gladly take more people anytime. So, let's get the show on the road!



    The Serebithian Crusade
    Chapter One

    Two young women stepped onto the large stage, noticing a silky red curtain behind them. The room was massive, filled with many seats and people quietly whispering. A soft, soothing melody played nearby; it was useful for the two that stood in order to help relax them and prevent running out with panic.

    The voices silenced, gathering their attention towards the two females while the sweet sound of violins started, gathering the delicate mood for what was going to be told.

    One of them had the sweet tone of blond hair with black tints underneath, her dark forest eyes looking beyond. Her outfit was modern: an adorable looking t-shirt, skinny jeans along with flat shoes. Her expression was somewhat anxious, wanting to get started right away before stage fright would kick in. The other stared at the crowd nervously, catching her breath. Her hair was a dark tone of a blend of brown and red together, her eyes set as emerald, although her outfit was very casual being a light sweater with denim jeans.

    Each of them carried a series of papers in their arms. The blond, who was darkwithrobots, cleared up her throat, ready to read; the brunette, Mel-Girl, watched across the grand crowd happily, starting to feel confident. The two glanced at each other and then nodded in agreement to begin as the violins grew softer.


    darkwithrobots: We set eyes on a small little town in the state of New York. It’s considered to be a typical sort of place, especially when you step away from the grand city of lights that is known all across the world. (In a careful tone) In this place, everything is very silent; it is quite rare if anything happens.
    Mel-Girl: When you spot the birds from a short distance away, none shall fly away. They simply sit still, focused on their own troubles. (Staring out towards the audience) The only main attraction was a private college. Even with the roar of the students, when they are gone, the city is asleep. But, the college itself looks more like some sort of hidden castle. Nature surrounds and swallows it whole, filled with plenty of fields, small little gardens, fountains, and so much more.
    darkwithrobots: Even though the city is calm, there is a strange aura about the location. (Softly) Something whispers to the students to prevent disturbing the peace and serenity, but only little sense it.
    Mel-Girl: That is why we set our eyes on one of the few who does sense something strange in the environment, which leads us to the story.
    darkwithrobots: What will happen to this one?
    Mel-Girl: Only time will tell as our journey begins…

    By then the violins had stopped, the crowd growing into applause. The two teenagers sighed with relief, nearly falling over backwards. They stepped towards the side of the stage, staring into the scene where the curtains had opened.

    darkwithrobots (whispering with a huge grin): We owned, Mel!
    Mel-Girl (nodding happily, whispering in return): I’m so glad we didn’t mess up. I would have fainted!
    darkwithrobots (in a low voice, amused): Same, but good thing we didn’t.

    By then, the stage appeared in front of a large ivory building. There were a few benches nearby along with a meadow of green grass surrounding all over. The time was very late, appearing to be very close to midnight. A young woman with raven black hair appeared with tan-like skin, her dark chocolate eyes hiding behind black glasses. The night was calm, but it did not help her sense of suspicion.

    ~Mist~ (carrying a tower of books, grumbling to herself): God damn it, why on earth did my professor have to give me an assignment like this?! (Sighs) Especially that I just finished this one…

    She then walked into the building, heading for the doors that presented the library as they opened instantly; she was too busy watching her balance to pay attention to anything else. Her eyes managed to glance at the stairs ahead of her, and then walked up as carefully as she could.

    Something told her to wait until morning to do this, but the books were filling up her entire room; she had to empty her room one way or another.

    Within a few minutes, she reached upon the top of the stairs, heading towards another door. This resembled the study section of the library, filled with many towers of text. Her hands were feeling sore from the heavy weight of the books, so she settled the tall amount of books on a nearby light brown table. The table was quite aged, appearing that it must have been there for several years.

    Carefully, she began to look over the titles of each of the books while shaking her head gently. There was a wooden ladder nearby that would prove usefulness, and so she took a crimson book in her delicate skinny hand. The adventurous one began climbing, step by step as if she was climbing a cliff. Each of her steps was softly pressed, not wanting to become a distraction to anyone that may be nearby busy concentrating on their studies.

    The dark haired young woman already knew from her very home what it was like to be stuck studying with three children running around in circles screaming their heads off. A small smile spread throughout her face, remembering her younger siblings, as annoying as they could be sometimes.

    ~Mist~ (eyes widening): Aha, here we go. (Sets the book back into its’ place) There. Now eight more to go… joy.

    As the young woman continues the slow (yet annoying) process, she eventually reached down to the last book which had an interesting topic that captured her attention: the Crusades. She smiled at the title gently.

    ~Mist~ (holding the book carefully, staring at it for a moment): Last but never least, a book about the Crusades. Oh, I’ll miss this one. It’s the only one that was actually interesting.

    Meanwhile, ~Mist~ focused on the book for a good moment, flipping through the pages that contained many drawings. Her eyes gleamed with wonder, smiling as she hugged the book close. She released it shortly after, about to place it back into its’ spot until…

    Thud!

    ~Mist~: Aw, crap! I better pick it up.

    With that, she carefully climbed down the ladder and landed on safe ground; her expression paused when she found herself kneeling in front of it. Her dark eyes stared in confusion at a particular section of the book that had opened. It felt awkward to her since she did not recall this part, or was it because she was a bit absent minded…?

    ~Mist~ (picking up the book without closing it): Hmm, that’s weird. I’ve never seen this…

    The image below her was a full two pages, a breathtaking portrayal of a violent bloody battle. Several people were posing in a fighting stance, ready to end the lives of their enemy with a sinister look in their eyes. Some were already hit by sharp weapons, their expressions filled with dreary pain. Others lay dead at their very feet as lifeless creatures.

    She cringed at the sight. Surely, war was never a pretty sight; the same always happened to either side until one could not bear it any longer. Did the world have to be like this every time there was a dispute? By now, the expression of the young history major grew sad with emotion.

    Her mind wandered into the past, recalling what she had learned during her lessons in education ever since she was a child. The World Wars came to mind along with many others that occurred during history. Even though she was not born in those times, she figured it must have been a difficult time… a very difficult time.

    ~Mist~ (taking notice of a sudden breeze): Eh? Why is it suddenly cold?

    The warm sunshine lights begin to dim slowly as she stood, staring at them with an alarmed expression on her face. At that moment, the library turned into a pitch black.

    ~Mist~: Holy crap, what time is it? I must have stayed longer than I thought! (Glances around, calling) Hello! Is anyone still around? Can anyone hear me?

    A loud slam echoed in the building which caused her body to tremble cautiously.

    ~Mist~: ****. Everyone must have left. (With worry) That’s not good.

    She then ran as fast as she could, hoping to reach the entrance of the large library. Passing after several walls filled with thick books and the set of stairs, her eyes panicked; she did not enjoy this feeling one bit. Where was the exit?

    The only sounds that were heard were the eerie air conditioner along with the short quick footsteps of her slippers. She breathed shortly once she reached the exit and shook her head slightly in astonishment.

    ~Mist~ (whispering): No, it can’t be… that’s the exit. (Takes a few steps back) I got to find my way out of here… somehow.

    As she turned around, the young woman spotted a warm light coming from somewhere. A wave of curiosity struck her, wanting to know where it was coming from. Perhaps it was someone who could help her get out.

    ~Mist~ (in a careful tone): Hello?

    No answer.

    She took a deep breath, noticing that it was beginning to appear; ~Mist~ stared at it disappearing into the air in wonder, her brown eyes widening with shock. Shivers fell upon her very spine, stepping towards the emerging light. Every step was the sound of her heart beating.

    But then, the light began to dim as well…

    ~Mist~ (reaching with one hand while beginning to run): No! Don’t go! Wait!

    As she moved closer, the light was fading away. What was this thing? Just what on earth was happening anyway?

    ~Mist~ (in a determined tone): Oh no, you’re not getting away from me!

    Her feet had reached the source, breathing slightly in response. She ignored the puffs of air before her, staring at the mysterious book she studied not long ago. She sat next to it, lightly tracing the picture with her fingers of one of the figures that stood in battle.

    ~Mist~: What is… this?

    Just as the light completely disappeared, a new breeze howled with power. As she blinked, books began to fall from the shelves, one by one. The sound grew louder as more began to fall at once, going down like a line of dominoes. The young woman stared, hearing its’ mighty roar.

    Her tan toned hands shielded her head at once, screaming in horror as the sound echoed in the lonely building. Her eyes were filled with fright, looking at the battle under her body. A shimmering light came from the book, creating its’ own gust of air. Her black hair flew in different directions as the young soon to be historian realized she was getting sucked into the very image.

    In a short time, her body fell into the air; she tried reaching for the opening of the book but failed.

    It was over.

    The curtains fall upon the scene, leading the two narrators to set foot upon the stage again. This time, only the sound of a lone violin was heard, barely even heard to the audience. Shimmering lights blinded the duo for a moment before beginning to speak.

    darkwithrobots: And the Great King named his grand empire after himself: Serebithian. And his subjects, loyal as they be, required their own area... and the Great King did, and they all divided and prospered...
    Mel-Girl: Now a portion of the subjects, the Shipethets, have waged war against each other, allying and attacking based on beliefs...
    darkwithrobots: The Serebithian Empire is falling into turmoil. The Priests, the Great King’s loyal enforcers, are doing all they can, in order to end the period known as The Grand Whine...

    The curtains open once more while the sound of the violin stopped; the audience applauded before silencing upon what was next.


    A grand castle overlooks the mass field, built over the remains of the ones before it. Flags wave and dance in the wind, and the moat is lowered over the fierce stream running in a border. A solitary figure walks over the wooden bridge, which rises up to a close.

    Giving only nods to those who greet him, the figure continues walking, opening a door to one of the towers. A spiral staircase descends down to the ruins of the previous castle...

    And the figure reaches what he was looking for. Kicking aside a few storage boxes, he rips open one and finds the objects he had been searching for.

    ???: Wanted posters... (Smirking) Heh, I remember when these came out...

    He looks at the one in his left hand, blinking at the all-too familiar face on the poster.

    ??? (reading): Wanted Dead or Alive... PokeProphet... bounty: 500,000,000 G. (Turns to the next one) Wanted Dead or Alive... Water Spirit... bounty: 750,000,000 G... Hard to believe...

    Setting down the posters back in the box, the figure stands up and looks around, hands on his hips.

    ??? (sighing): Can’t do much about them now... they haven’t been seen here for years.
    Voice: Yet we still know they’re around.

    He whips around and blinks at the person who has joined him.

    ???: Priest Chelc...

    The brunette grins, a piece of paper held in her hand. She walks down the last few steps closer to him.

    Chelc: I knew I’d find you here... Blue.

    She holds up the paper: another wanted poster. The picture displays the face of a grinning teenage boy with dark hair and gleaming eyes.

    Chelc: This just came out a few minutes ago... (Reading) Wanted Dead or Alive... Cap D. Blue. (Looks up) Want to know your new bounty?
    Blue: Just spill it.
    Chelc: Fine... (Looks back at the poster) Bounty... 625,000,000 G.

    She notices Blue’s wide eyes and laughs.

    Chelc: Right between PokeProphet and WS, then... you should be proud.
    Blue (snatching the poster from her): Says one of the Grand King’s Priests... He puts this up and you come to deliver it personally?
    Chelc (shrugs): Better me than a bunch of bounty hunters or rival shippers.

    Blue says nothing, still staring at the poster.

    Blue: At least they got a decent picture. Remember Blacknite? When he got his first poster, he went straight up to the Great King to complain and we never heard from him again.
    Chelc: Rules are rules, Blue. Traitors are given no mercy.
    Blue (waving his poster in front of her face): Then why are there people with bounties still running around? The rookies with bounties over 100 million Gs are still out there somewhere.
    Chelc (frowning): Are you saying us Priests are irresponsible?
    Blue: No, never... You just let them run off before anyone could get whacked.
    Chelc: Whatever... look, the King’s Government still says that we gave them a head’s start for being... “loyal contributors”.
    Blue (grunts): Anyways, have you heard anything new about–?
    Chelc (cutting him off): Nothing’s been happening for a while... Everyone’s been staying within their own kingdom. Now, I have to go. Stay inside.
    Blue: Right... (Holds up his poster) Just gonna have this hung up upstairs. I still deserve a little recognition, after all!

    Chelc rolled her eyes and walks up the stairs, Blue following after. The latter looks out a window, then points at a small figure lying in the grass a few yards in front of the castle.

    Blue: Hey, we got ourselves a freebie.
    Chelc (looking out the window): I’ll alert the sentries... We better get her before they find out that this one’s her.
    Blue (grinning): ‘Bout time she decided to join in on the fun!
    Chelc (facing Blue): You call it whatever you want... but the Great King is still unconcerned about it.
    Blue: Let him think what he wants... but with her– (Pointing out the window) –here now, things are really gonna start up.
    Chelc (walking further up the stairs to the ground floor): The last time you said that, our last castle got destroyed.
    Blue: Hey, that wasn’t even my fault!

    He runs after her with the poster in his hand as the red curtains fall.

    The Serebithian Crusade
    (End Chapter One)



    Notes [2]: Yay, I’m so thrilled that it’s done! I’m really hoping we get good feedback on this. Now, in case you’re a little confused about the ranking of members such as when Blue introduced Chelc, don’t worry; it will all be explained throughout the story. I think I’ll be putting up some extra notes on the site, and maybe create a list of everyone who is in the story so far. But just in case, Blue-kun thought of a neat way to arrange how we have the higher ranks upon the forum so far.

    Admin (Serebii) = King
    Super Mods = Advisors
    Mods+ = Bishops
    Mods = Priests


    Why religious terms? Well, if you think about it, the Crusades was considered to be one of the most religious times in history where everyone was obsessed with converting anyone that did not support your religion to become a part of it. See how it ties in with the shippers themselves? As for the ordinary members, we’ll have to think a little more on that.

    Oh, and in case you’re a little confused on the Gs, that’s the way money will be shown. Gs = gold. So, I hope that clears some confusion.

    I think another thing to point out is that Blue-kun & I have different ways of writing, so for this chapter, we’ll blending them together. I think you guys could see the difference. xD We’re unsure of how our pattern will be, but we’ll get that part figured out.

    Another thing to point out are the bountys mentioned by Chelc & Blue. Quoted from Blue-kun, In times of war, both the government (King Serebii) and the kingdoms put prices on the people who are the greatest threats. Anyone with a bounty of 500,000,00 G or higher are especially dangerous. So basically, you can get a bounty set by the government and the kingdoms combined together. I think that clears that part up.

    I hope everyone is enjoying their roles so far! I hope everyone’s I character, or else you can throw a chair at me. 8D It’s still the beginning and we have plenty more members to introduce for the story. If anyone is interested to be a part of the story, please PM me with your application found in the site. There are a few conditions, so be sure to read over that.

    Lastly, the title! Blue-kun had thought of a different title before, but then we both somehow forgot it. Yes, we have terrible memories sometimes, I know. xD So then earlier today, we were trying to come up with a new title & Blue-kun came up with this one. So, it makes good sense for our title.

    Again, comments are greatly appreciated! The next chapter will be written soon, hopefully. So, let’s hear it from the people! :333
    Last edited by ~Mist~; 25th July 2008 at 8:48 PM.
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  2. #2
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    I have heard about this in one of your posts a while ago. I thought the first chapter started out pretty strong but as I can imagine, it seems like a lot of work to actually get this one out. Disregarding some spelling errors, I find it very interesting. I like to see the second chapter out some time.
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    zomg. :'D

    Wow, I wasn't expecting to be in this chapter at all, but sweet. Priest Chelc, rofl. I can see myself taking on the priest role, so it's all good. XD I love this so far! It's really cool, especially the way Tiff and Mel are telling the story, and the way you get sucked into the book. I didn't see any mistakes or anything...but...that might be because I like the fic so much or something, and I'm not the best reviewer, so yeah. xD

    I EAGERLY AWAIT THE NEXT CHAPTER

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    Oh, yay, reviews! *dances with her sandwich*

    @ The Horizon: Glad to see you reviewing here! Spelling errors? Oooh, I'll search for any around. But, I'm glad you think it's interesting! This one will be a tough story to handle, but I think we'll find a way around. Blue-kun and I have plenty of ideas and honestly, we're having a lot of fun with it! =D Thanks for your input, The Horizon! :3

    @ Chelc: I am so amused to picture you as a priest. LMAO. XD I'm so happy you really like it so far! Blue-kun and I are having a blast writing this, so we're happy with the result. Yeah, I'm trying to look around for any mistakes but like I said, I get a feeling Mark would find them whenever he posts. [/prediction] xD But yay! I shall start writing the next one soon. >D Thanks for your opinion, Chelc! :333
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  5. #5
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    This fic is really good! Even though it's in more of a script format, it's still extremely descriptive so I can really get the feel of what's going on and I'm glad you're enjoying writing this fic!

    Haha, me as a narrator is amusing. I am usually the type of person to tell things as they are instead of with description but that's okay, because a narrator needs to preferably be descriptive so no worries there!

    So yeah, good job with the writing and you can let me know when the next chapter is up!

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    Oh, I heard about this fanfic but never applied, if you're still accepting applications ~Mist~, I'd love to apply.

    Anyways, on to the actual review, I loved it, the way it was written, the story itself and history is my favorite subject in school so I like that you took a historical approach to this. Not much else to say except I don't really know much members here but I like the way you portrayed them

    I can't wait for the next chapter


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    Mel: Yay, it's great to see a review from you! I had a lot of fun setting ya as Narrator. You guys were mostly reading from the script and trying not to get stage fright, wth. xD I'm glad you like your role; I was worried that you guys wouldn't like your roles or anything; I'm jsut weird like that, I know. xD But we try our best trying to add as much information as possible to set things smoothly. I kept rewriting the entire first scene of narration because I was going to have you guys talk it all out, but then it didn't sound powerful enough for a beginning, so I switched that around. I'm happy to see you're enjoying it, so thankies! You guys really saved me! xD

    Pokewiz: Yay, happy to see ya here! Oooh, sure thing! I'm still accepting since we need plenty of people later on, so feel free! :333 Oh, your favorite subject is history, too? YAY! XD I'm happy to hear that you love it so far, that's a good sign. xD Blue-kun & I are planning to do a lot with this fic, and I love going on research sprees about the Crusades. =D But happy you're ejoying it, thanks for the review! :3
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  8. #8
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    X3 YAY! It's here!

    I really love how everything's set up so far~ I love the descriptions! Whoo Chelc's a priest~ xD Can't wait to see what happens next! X3
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    YUP! AT LAST, RIGHT? XD

    Aww, I'm happy you like it so far, Katsu! Hooray! Description is a powerful weapon, wooo! xD And yes, I knew Chelc being a priest would be fun to do! xDDDD But yays, I'll let you know when more comes up. :3 Thanks for reviewing, Katsu! =D
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  10. #10

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    This is certainly an interesting start, I liked to see how more of this unravels later on and see more characters appear. ;P

    Hahaha, and Chelc fits so well as a priest. XD
    I waste my life away on Nico Nico Douga.

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    Thanks a bunch, Buster! I'm looking forward to introduce more characters later as well as the other shipping kingdoms. Blue-kun & I are going to have fun with the next chapter. xD

    Yes! LMAO, I find it funny how many people like that part for Chelc! xDDDD You can thank Blue-kun for that. xDDDD Thanks for your review, Buster! :3 And you should stop beign a procrastinator & send your application! xD
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  12. #12
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    ftw.

    is all I can say.

    I didn't see any errors, and your story line/plot is highly original. :]

    Ya got me down pretty well, so don't worry about the ooc thing.

    take me somewhere stars are still asleep.

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    ftw.

    is all I can say.

    I didn't see any errors, and your story line/plot is highly original. :]

    Ya got me down pretty well, so don't worry about the ooc thing.

    take me somewhere stars are still asleep.

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    Holy crap, we posted at the same time! xD [/observant]

    Hooray, I'm still checking Word just in case, but I'm glad you didn't find any, Tiff! xD But I'm happy you ghuys all like it so far! So much positive feedback, and original is awesome. 8D And yays, I was worried for a second but with you guys all telling me otherwise, I'm okay with stuff. Thanks for your words, Tiff! I owe ya. :3
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

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    Woah it's finally here! :O

    Congratulations on a great start, you two! *grumbles* But I wasn't in it... *grumbles*

    Your writing is very good; plenty of description despite being a script format (which naturally tends to force the writer to lack important description), so that's very good news.

    I actually didn't see any spelling errors whatsoever, though I did see some somewhat bizarre errors that are difficult to catch, like this one in the first paragraph:

    Two young women stepped onto the large stage, noticing a silky red curtain behind them. The room was massive, filled with many seats and people quietly whispering. A soft, smoothing melody played nearby; it was useful for the two that stood in order to help relax them and prevent running out with panic.
    I'm guessing you meant to write soothing? There are a couple of other instances like this in the chapter which could be something to look out for in future proofreads of upcoming chapters.

    All in all though; a great intro which really pulled me into the action! Looking forward to chapter two! It won't be long, will it, huh, will it huh huh?
    Good Love Charm
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    Neat! I'm lovin' the play style. XD Now I'm just waiting for my role! Let's hope I'm not some annoying gaki... LMAO;;

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    Gaz: Yipeee! I knew you would post, Gaz! Thanks a bunch! This one was a little tough to get used to due to the format, so I kept reading a ton of plays. xP No worries, you'll be in the upcoming chapters. xP Oh, LMAO! Yay! Thanks for pointing that mistake out! I should have written smoothie. xD I corrected it. =D We'll do our best with the next chapter. :333 Thanks again for the review! =D

    Hikari: Thanks! I'm enjoying the play format; it's tough but fun. xDDD You'll appear sooner or later, so stay tuned! Thanks for your words! :333
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  18. #18

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    hehe... i'm liking this so far.
    i like the way you put it into play format--almost like there's a story within the story. and geez, that must be hard to keep track of XP

    the overall idea of it really blows my mind. it must've taken a lot of creativity, a lot of textbooks, or a relly wierd dream. i'll be keeping an eye on this. best of luck ;D

    Tff
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  19. #19
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    Hehe, I should love this !
    History was always my favourite subject at school, and the Crusades are one of the most fascinating periods in time...So this should rock....

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Mist~ View Post
    darkwithrobots (whispering with a huge grin): We owned, Mel!
    Mel-Girl (nodding happily, whispering in return): I’m so glad we didn’t mess up. I would have fainted!
    darkwithrobots (in a low voice, amused): Same, but good thing we didn’t.
    lol Slight stage fright ? xD

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Mist~ View Post
    Carefully, she began to look over the titles of each of the books while shaking her head gently. There was a wooden ladder nearby that would prove usefulness, and so she took a crimson book in her delicate skinny hand.
    I believe it's either prove useful or prove of usefulness...

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Mist~ View Post
    darkwithrobots: The Serebithian Empire is falling into turmoil. The Priests, the Great King’s loyal enforcers, are doing all they can, in order to end the period known as The Grand Whine...
    LOL xDDDD


    The ending just got me sucked in !
    It's actually hilarious to read about people we see around every day interracting in a fic based upon shipping wars

    This is going to be great ! Can't wait for the rest !!
    Hope my application was valid enough lol
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  20. #20
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    Teddiursa fan forever: Yup, I'm glad you like that aspect of the story. We have the story where our narrators are with the audience and stuff and then there's the world within the shipping kingdoms. It's a tough storyline, but it's a ton of fun. :3 And actually, it was all three, but the dream started it all. The idea is fun to work with. =D But thanks so much for your kind review! :333

    Mark: History is such an awesome subject, so I enjoyed that I can research about the old times and relate it for this story. Yay, history. <3 Yup, it takes bravery to stand in front of a crowd so stage fright is a god way to go. xDDD And ah, I knew you would find something, yay! I'll go correct that right away; thanks for catching that mistake! and yes, LMAO @ the quote! Blue-kun thought of that part. xDDDD But yays, I'm very happy to see more people apply! Thanks a bunch again for your review, Mark! :333
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  21. #21
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    This looks to be a really interesting and unique story. I can't wait to see how it turns out.
    My fanfictions
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  22. #22
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    Yay, another review. I'm getting happy with them. xD But thanks a bunch Matkin22! =D I find unique stories to be really fun to work with. :3 We'll all have plenty in stock later on. =D Thanks again!
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

  23. #23
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    First off, I'm loving the narration. It's really funny. XD I've always been a sucker for ancient times and (especially) ancient wars, so I've been looking forward to this since I saw the application. It's a very nice start, and I can't wait until the action really starts. It should be a fun read the whole way through!

    ...And really, the whole shipping wars premise is genius. Just thought I'd throw that out. X3
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  24. #24
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    It's great to see the first new chap of the fic Kris. I love the title as well, sounds really powerful, fun serious and religious too.

    I like how you've made the mods as preists and the narration is really nice so far.

    ??? (reading): Wanted Dead or Alive... PokeProphet... bounty: 500,000,000 G. (Turns to the next one) Wanted Dead or Alive... Water Spirit... bounty: 750,000,000 G... Hard to believe
    I like who Blue was ??? at first, some good tension for the begining. ^_^

    Overall great so far. Can't wait for the next, with al of our us Spff members in.


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  25. #25
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    taitofan: Aw, same! I was the kind of student who stays up for all the documentaries while everybody else was dead on their desk. xDDD Thanks a bunch for your kind comment! I'm really happy to see people liking it, so we'll do more for the next chapter. :3 The Crusades is the only time period that appears to make the most sense in terms in ship wars and all of that. =D Thanks again! :333

    Chloe: Yay, thanks! I'm glad you like the title; I think it suits the fic, but it will later on into the story. xD And yes, Blue-kun wanted to add a little mystery for his character, but I'm very happy you like it so far! Thankies! =D
    For those who'd like to keep in contact, you know where to find me. ♥

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