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Thread: Pokemon Academy: Dedication Through Light and Darkness

  1. #201
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    Well, that was fun... while it lasted.

    Oh, you know what I mean. The evil Jyharri, the tension between Jyharri and Sydnie... the list goes on. Let's see how long Jyharri Stu will keep this flame going, eh? *wink, wink*

    I'm too lazy right now to remember where you made spelling mistakes, and as Silawen's now on the case, I guess I won't need to unless I review a lot sooner.

    However, don't forget your commas when someone is referred to directly in speech. Something like

    "Get him Milotic!"
    should be

    "Get him, Milotic!"
    or

    "Charizard Iron Tail!"
    should be

    "Charizard, Iron Tail!"
    or
    "Charizard! Iron Tail!"
    if you don't wish to use them so much.

    Will let you know about more isues when they arise. So it's back to school, hunh? Wonder how that's gonna work out...

    Interesting piece. Nice battle too!

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  2. #202
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    Okay, my life is unbelivably swamped at the moment, and I don't even have time for my own fic. However, I will give you a very brief review.

    “Around a decade ago a house was set ablaze,” Damien started. “This house was home to a family of four. Everyone in the house perished, all but one.”

    “What does this have to do with me?” Jyharri asked as he crossed his arms.

    Damien chuckled as he slowly approached Jyharri. Damien’s eyes slowly turned red as he looked into Jyharri’s yellow ones. “The one that survived was me and I saw the person who killed my family. It was a man using a Charizard. I’ve done my research on you and I heard your father was a trainer of Charizards.”

    “I never even knew my father,” shouted Jyharri. “I still don’t see what this has to do with me.”
    This whole exchange, with Damien and Jyharri about the Charizards and all that crap seems both manufactured and rushed. I mean, come on, they're in the middle of an epic battle where people are dying, why would they stop and explain things? It seemed very family guy-esq. Also, the dialogue between Sydnie and Jyharri could stand to be spaced out a bit. Description or some narration would be nice.

    “When I win, the world will know my power,” Jyharri replied. “They will know the power of Team Lustrous! Charizard hit Milotic with Wing Attack!”
    Rule #1- If you plan on writing about a misguided Anikan Skywalker type character, you need to make their fall from grace belivable. Otherwise moments like the one above seem out of place.

    “I’m sorry but I’m going to have to refuse,” Jyharri told her. Turning away from her he gripped the Pokéball she tossed him tightly.

    “Excuse me?” she asked in disbelief. “You refuse?”
    Okay, now I'm mad. Jyharri goes batshit insane, convinces himself of all his stupid beliefs, and than in an instant, he comes back to normal, and with a strong conviction?! Pardon the star wars refrence, but when Darth Vader was beginning to loosen the grip the dark side had on him, it took an entire goddamn movie, not thirty seconds and some memories. And Sydnie takes him back? After the death and destruction that was arguably his fault?

    I do like that they kissed though.

    And I agree with Silawen about the rewrites. I think you should give the fic a once over....it really helps with quality.

    PM when the next one comes out!

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  3. #203
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    Dude, this fics awesome, spent the last 2 days reading the whole thing. Add me to the PM list please. Thanks
    Quote Originally Posted by Son_of_Shadows View Post
    “Okay... Inny, for the record, this is no longer humiliation. It is now an expression we humans like to call 'up yours'.”

    I see. What does that mean?


    “... Ask Victoria. That should be fun.”
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  4. #204
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    Hey there readers. With the posting of this chapter we are nearly at the end of Dedication Through Light and Darkness. Only one more chapter after this one. The plot has pretty much been wrapped up. If there are any holes still then I apologize. Didn't say much this time. Anyway, as always, enjoi!

    Dedication Through Light and Darkness

    Opening 4

    Chapter 26: The Recovery Begins!

    “What’ll you do now Damien? You don’t have much reason to stay here since the Black Organization has fallen.”

    The older man looked towards the sky, the sun hiding behind the horizon. He began to chuckle as he pushed his hands into his pockets and began to walk in the opposite direction of the Academy.

    “I’m not finished with Team Lustrous,” he said, stopping briefly. “As long as they exist I will continue to fight against them.”

    “Good luck to you then,” said Sydnie.

    “May our paths cross again,” was all Damien said before he took off towards the shoreline.

    Once the man vanished, Sydnie turned back to Jyharri. A sad expression had taken over his face as he looked at all the motionless bodies around them. Pulling his chin up, Sydnie smiled at him, Jyharri returning the gesture. The two friends then began to walk back towards the school using each other as a support.
    ----------------------------------------------

    “Mio, can you hear me? Say something Mio.”

    Slowly the infirmary came into view as Mio slowly opened his eyes. Beginning to sit up, his head began to pound. He clutched it fast, falling back into the pillows. Crowded around him were four people, all of them had a worried look on them.

    “Are you alright Mio?” asked a girl in a green blazer. The light shined off her face brilliantly due to the wetness.

    “Charlotte, were you crying?” Mio groaned out.

    “Of course I was,” she replied as she began to wipe her face. “I heard you got hurt and I rushed here as fast I could.”

    “What happened?” Mio asked holding his head.

    “Someone said you were trying to find some Pokémon on the cliff and fell off,” answered Sydnie. “Luckily Jyharri was there to take you to the infirmary.”

    When they’re eyes met Mio studied Jyharri suspiciously. There was something about Jyharri that he forgot. Searching his mind, Mio only found more pain. Groaning once more, he sat up, his breathing becoming heavy.

    “You can leave now darling,” said the nurse. “You’re going to be feeling headaches off and on for the next week or so, but it shouldn’t be anything serious. If you have any more major problems then come and see me.”

    “Great,” Brandon cheered throwing his fist into the air. “Now we can go practice for our field exam!”

    Exiting the infirmary, the group arrived on the main campus. The sun had fallen behind the horizon, the sky a pitch black. Lamp posts had been lighted all around the campus, making a light path around the school. Once they began to head back to the dorms, the Leaf Green and girl and Sydnie had fallen behind, talking and giggling at the boys walking in front of them. The campus seemed like a ghost town. The only people that had walked the campus was the group of five.

    “Hey Mio,” Jyharri whispered to him. “Who’s the girl? She seems familiar, but I’m sure I’ve never met her before.”

    “That’s my girlfriend,” Mio told him. “We’ve been dating for almost a year now. You’ve met her before.”

    “Are you serious?”

    “She was with me when I first met you,” explained Mio. “Not only that, but we were holding hands before we went off into that cave.”

    Pushing his hat up to scratch his head, Jyharri gave Mio a look that said he did not have any idea what he was talking about. Mio threw him a disgusted look.

    “You never pay attention to me!”

    Mio stormed off ahead, arriving at the docks to the Fire Red dorm in a matter of minutes. Once they were alone, Brandon looked at Jyharri with a smile. When Jyharri looked at him, he began to chuckle.

    “What’s so funny?” demanded Jyharri.

    “The fact that you’re oblivious to the fact that Sydnie has been watching you this entire time,” replied Brandon. “She would say something to Charlotte, look at you, blush, and then look away. I don’t see why you two aren’t together. You’re perfect for each other.”

    Jyharri scoffed at Brandon’s delirious statements. As they passed the main Academic building, Brandon nodded to Jyharri before walking off towards a large yellow dome. Turning around, he saw Charlotte give Sydnie a quick hug before skipping off to Mio who had suddenly appeared by the path leading to the Leaf Green dorm.

    “You could wait,” Sydnie called out, a smile on her face.

    Stopping in his tracks, Jyharri turned his head slightly, a smirk on his face. Once Sydnie caught up she grabbed his hand, their fingers interlocking. Silence reigned over them as they walked onto the boat that traveled to the Fire Red dorm. Still holding hands as they sat down, the two occasionally looked at each other with a smile. As they left the docks, torches had lit the way to the dorms, the fire burning brightly. The lobby, like the campus, was completely deserted. There was no source of light except for the fire outside. Leading the way, Sydnie pulled Jyharri towards the left, towards the girls’ dorms.

    “Sydnie-” began Jyharri before being silenced by Sydnie’s index finger.

    Proceeding through the sliding doors, the two Fire Red students stopped at a door that wasn’t too far from the lobby. Sydnie placed her palm on a small machine located next to the door. After a few beeps and a loud click, the door opened. The room looked exactly as it had several months back. Jyharri remembered being in the room when he had to go on a date dressed up as a girl. Pulling him even more, Sydnie led Jyharri to another door, this one not needing verification. Once the door was swung open Sydnie’s room was revealed. Sydnie brought Jyharri in, closing the door behind her. When the door was finally shut the two finally released each other’s hand.

    “It feels good to finally be back in a dorm,” commented Jyharri as he sat on Sydnie’s bed.

    “Not only that, but it feels good to finally not worry about anything life threatening,” Sydnie added as she sat next to him. “Now we can just rest.”

    Sydnie laid back, her head coming to a rest on a large pillow. Following suit, Jyharri lay behind her, wrapping his arm around her torso. Sydnie smiled before closing her eyes and drifting slowly into the unconscious state called sleep.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Come here Jyharri.”

    Just as he had before, Jyharri had seen the woman who possessed similar features to Sydnie in his dreams. She had a cheerful expression on her face, beckoning to him. A tree had been placed behind her, the leaves a golden color. A leaf slowly began to fall towards the yellow ground. Running to the woman, Jyharri let out a high pitched laugh. As soon as the leaf hit the ground the scene had changed. Now inside a small room, the woman sat in a chair clear across the room, her head hung low. Jyharri approached her, trying to get her to move. She remained motionless, her hair hanging in front of her face. Pushing a little harder, the woman fell off the chair and onto the floor still not moving. Coming back to reality, Jyharri bolted upright. He began to pant as he looked around the room he was in.

    This isn’t Sydnie’s room, he thought as he saw his belongings against the opposite wall. I’m in my own room. But how did I get in here?

    As he got out of his bed, he noticed his blazer was hanging off the chair by the door. Grabbing his blazer, he quickly opened the door, entering the main room. The room was deserted of people minus Jyharri. A loud chime sounded from his pocket, a light expelling out as well. Pulling out his PDA he saw that a message had been sent to him.

    “It’s from Brad,” Jyharri noted. He began to read the message allowed as he walked to the door. “I saw you and Sydnie walk towards the dorm so I decided to tail you. When I noticed you were going into her room I quickly put my foot in between the door and the wall so it wouldn’t lock. After about ten minutes I entered the room and brought you back to our room. The headmistress and her staff were checking the dorms and I wouldn’t be much of a friend if I let you get in trouble again. You can thank me later. Peace!”

    Jyharri shook his head as he began to run out of the dormitories, heading for the dock to the main campus.

    ----------------------------------------------

    “Nice try trainer, but this is where you lose. Blaziken finish this with Blaze Kick!”

    A smile drew itself across Jessica’s face as her battle with a proctor raged on. The proctor’s Blaziken jumped towards her Quilava, his right foot surrounded in flames.

    “Dodge and hit,” said Jessica. “Go Quick Attack!”

    Dashing around Blaziken in a flash, Quilava jumped at him, tackling him in the back. The Blaze Pokémon hit the ground, skidding across it before jumping back up. The large battlefield behind the academic buildings had been occupied by many students and proctors.

    “Now use Flame Wheel,” shouted Jessica.

    Once again dashing at Blaziken, Quilava became covered in flames. Blaziken flipped over him easily, his right fist beginning to glow.

    “Let’s go,” roared the proctor, his dark hair flowing in the small breeze, “Sky Uppercut!”

    Before Jessica could tell Quilava what to do, he was punched high into the air by Blaziken. A small cry of agony came from Quilava as he flew into the sky. Following up from the uppercut, Blaziken’s foot once again began to glow.

    “Time to end it,” the proctor said. “Knock him down with Blaze Kick!”

    Blaziken’s leg swung around Quilava, quickly coming down on his face. The Volcano Pokémon fell to the ground fast. Hitting it with a thud, Quilava’s body began to twitch a little. Pulling out a red and white sphere a red light engulfed Quilava, bringing him into the sphere. The proctor did the same, stowing the Pokéball away in his purple blazer.

    “You did well trainer,” the proctor shouted across the field. “You met all the requirements that were set. Even though you didn’t win you still pass.”

    After quickly bowing to the proctor Jessica hurriedly walked off the field with a sigh of relief.

    Man, the teachers here sure are tough, she thought. I hope Genevieve did well enough to pass.

    “Jessica!” called a voice.

    Turning around Jessica saw Genevieve running through the small crowds of students, her arms waving in the air. Jessica smiled as her friend reached her, panting.

    “I passed,” said Genevieve between breaths. “I almost knocked her Pokémon out too. How did you do?”

    “Same as you,” replied Jessica, “but I wasn’t even close to knocking out his Pokémon. That proctor was just too tough.”

    As they started to walk down the field, a bright blue figure appeared in the corner of Genevieve’s eye. Instantly turning, she saw Jyharri commanding his Glaceon against a proctor’s Electabuzz. Once she nudged Jessica she turned as well, watching as Jyharri’s Glaceon fired a jagged blue beam out of her mouth.

    “I hope Jyharri wins,” whispered Genevieve.

    Jessica didn’t comment on Genevieve’s statement. The blue beam rocketed at Electabuzz, but the Electric type simply emitted a barrier of electricity destroying the beam almost instantly.

    “Go for an Iron Tail,” said Jyharri.

    Glaceon raced towards Electabuzz, her tail beginning to glow. The proctor smiled as Glaceon jumped into the air.

    “There’s no need to move Electabuzz,” the female proctor announced. “Stand your ground.”

    “Hmph,” Jyharri said with a smirk. “Go into Shadow Ball!”

    Flipping through the air, a ball of black energy formed in her mouth. Both Electabuzz and his trainer appeared surprised. The ball launched out of Glaceon’s mouth, whizzing straight towards Electabuzz.

    “Block with ThunderPunch,” the proctor shouted quickly.

    Instantly, Electabuzz’s arm became surrounded in electricity, just as his body did before. Once the ball of energy met Electabuzz’s fist it blew up, pushing Electabuzz back a little bit.

    “Ice Beam one more time,” Jyharri commanded.

    Once again the jagged blue beam shot out of Glaceon’s mouth, hitting the ground around Electabuzz’s feet. The ground froze instantly, ice forming around Electabuzz’s feet as well.

    “Unleash your Thunder attack,” yelled the proctor.

    The entire ground around the Pokémon began to tremble as energy began to build in Electabuzz. Falling to her knees, Glaceon became a sitting Psyduck, unable to dodge the attack that was to come. Letting out a loud roar, electricity exploded from Electabuzz, forming a large lightning bolt. The ice around his feet shattered instantly as the lightning bolt came down, striking Glaceon in the back. The Ice type fell on her side, no longer moving.

    “I’m sorry, but you lose,” the proctor examined as they both recalled their Pokémon.

    Without even saying a word Jyharri nodded to the proctor before placing his Pokéball back onto his belt. The proctor held up her hand, giving him a thumb up as a sign of his passing. Throwing his hands into his pockets, Jyharri slowly walked off of the battlefield, heading in Jessica and Genevieve’s direction. Genevieve felt a fluttering feeling in her stomach as Jyharri neared them. It was like the day they had met. As he passed by their eyes met. Even though they hadn’t exchanged any words Genevieve knew enough just from looking into his eyes.

    “Something is different about Jyharri,” observed Genevieve as she and Jessica began to walk again.

    “What do you mean?” Jessica asked.

    “The fire is gone,” Genevieve replied. “That confidence or as you and Sydnie say, arrogance, is completely gone. Didn’t you notice that when he lost he didn’t show any sign of remorse or anger?”

    “You can’t expect people to become upset every time they lose,” said Jessica. “Maybe he’s grown up a little.”

    Genevieve nodded with a smile as she watched Jyharri walk off, disappearing over a hill.

    ----------------------------------------------

    “This summer is going to seem long.”

    “It’s only two months. Before you know it we’ll be back here.”

    “I know, but it will feel weird not having you near. I’m going to miss you Jyharri.”

    Sydnie and Jyharri had been sitting under a tree near the docks. Boats had been docked there, waiting for all the students to board the ship that took them to their home region. Knowing she would cry, Sydnie avoided eye contact with Jyharri. Tears began to build up in her eyes.

    “It’s alright Sydnie,” Jyharri told her with a slight chuckle. “You can always write me a letter and I’ll always reply back. Let’s get you to your boat. It’s going to be leaving soon.”

    Neither one of them spoke a single word as they approached the boat. Steam billowed out of the smoke stacks that towered above the deck. A loud blaring horn sounded signaling the ship was leaving soon.

    “Did you take your things on board already?” asked Jyharri.

    “They had Machoke and Machamp take everyone’s stuff earlier today, you know that,” Sydnie replied still not facing Jyharri.

    “Why don’t you look at me and tell me?” he asked trying to look into her eyes.

    “If I look at you then I’m going to miss you even more when I board the ship,” Sydnie told him as she began to walk up the board walkway towards the ship.

    I know, thought Jyharri as he grabbed Sydnie’s hand. Pulling her back, he turned her around, their eyes meeting for the first time of the day. With a smile Jyharri removed his black and red hat, placing it on Sydnie’s head.

    “What are you doing?” she asked, pushing the too big hat up a little.

    “This way you’ll have something from me near you at all times,” Jyharri replied a smile still on his face. “On top of that, you’ll never forget me.”

    Once the horn sounded from the boat again Jyharri let go of Sydnie’s hand, allowing her to continue onto the boat. The walkway was pushed off the boat as soon as Sydnie was on the dock, the boat itself starting to move. Running to the side, she waved at Jyharri, tears beginning to roll down her face. Despite her starting to cry, a smile was on her face. Jyharri simply placed his hand into the air, his fingers slightly bent. As the boat began to pick up speed, Sydnie began to slowly disappear from Jyharri’s sight, but he didn’t turn away until she completely vanished.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sidewinder
    While it is very reminiscent of a lot of journey trainer fics, it held my attention. It stands out among a lot of the other fics I've read lately and I'm excited to continue the story.

  5. #205
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    Hi, I have been reading your story for a couple of hours now, I found it quite good actually. Different then usual. I was a bit sad that Eevee didn't evovle into Umbreon but Glaceon's not too bad.The main character is quite a gary stu, all these girls liking him lol.

    Anyways interested to see your last chapter
    Claims Amber Benson and Ali Larter as Bishie.


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    United we stand but seperated we fall

    And so the fifth generation begins...

  6. #206
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    So... the penultimate chapter... hmm... I'd like to say interesting, but it seemed a tad rushed in the battles area. You ought to work on that. It would help your chapter length a lot.

    Your only major grammatical fault is your coma usage in speech quotations. You realy need to review them. Your cast sound unhelpfully insane without them. :P

    Well, I guess we'll see more of the students sooner or later. Will wait for your final chapter to see that go down for myself.

    Bring it on, hotshot.

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  7. #207
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    Here we are...The final chapter. Hope all goes well! That's all I'm going to say. Enjoi!



    Dedication Through Light and Darkness

    Chapter 27: Coming Home…

    The steam from a boat traveled over the Academy. The boat’s destination was the Sinnoh region in the far north. Jyharri began to walk along the docks, waiting for the boat that would take him home to the Johto region. Looking to his left he saw groups of people sitting under the trees by the buildings, shading themselves from the sun. Jyharri began to smile as he turned his head to face the sea. The sun sparkled off the water’s surface as the waves lapped against the shore. The distant sound of Wingull squawks could be heard as they flew across the ocean.

    “Hey,” a voice called out, “tall Fire Red guy!”

    Even though he wasn’t sure if the voice was calling him Jyharri looked around for the person who was calling out. Sure enough he came to spot two girls who both sported Leaf Green blazers. The girl on the left was shorter, but only by a few inches or so. Her curly hair bounced as she walked much like the other girl’s long blonde hair. She sported square frame glasses with the frames themselves being a black color. The taller girl’s eyes were locked on Jyharri, a fierce look in them. Her bosom was noticeably large, being the first thing Jyharri noticed.

    “What do you want?” questioned Jyharri.

    “The Kanto ship won’t be here for a while,” explained the girl on the right. “I need to pass the time by. Are you up for a battle?”

    “Fine,” Jyharri told her, “but it’s a one on one. The Johto ship will be here soon.”

    “That’s fine by me.”

    “Go easy on him Desiree’,” the other girl piped in. “Don’t want him to end the year with a humiliating defeat.”

    The girl known as Desiree’ pulled out a single Pokéball, a small smirk on her face as she held it between her index and middle finger. Jyharri followed suit, pulling out his own Pokéball. Jyharri jumped back a few feet as they stared each other down.

    “Showdown Combusken,” yelled Desiree’ tossing her Pokéball first.

    “Gastly standby for battle,” Jyharri shouted as he launched his Pokéball onto the makeshift battlefield.

    Once the bright lights hit the ground the students who had been talking in groups turned their attention towards the oncoming battle. On Jyharri’s side was one of his newest Pokémon, Gastly, and while on Desiree’s side stood the Young Fowl Pokémon. A small group of students jogged up to the side where Desiree’s friend stood to observe what was about to unfold.

    “I’ll start it off,” Desiree’ said. “Combusken go in with an Ember attack!”

    After scratching himself with his beak a bit Combusken began to charge at Gastly. Opening said beak, small fireballs shot out at Gastly. With a large smile on his face Gastly seemingly disappeared, reappearing a few feet to the left of the attack.

    “Fire another Ember,” commanded Desiree’.

    Combusken jumped into the air this time, firing the fireballs from above. Once again Gastly appeared to the left of the attack.

    “Gastly show them your Lick attack,” ordered Jyharri.

    Once Combusken landed Gastly swiftly flew in towards him. The Fire type flinched, slightly jumping into the air. Opening his mouth, Gastly’s giant tongue fell out, rubbing up the side of Combusken’s face. Combusken stumbled backwards a bit before regaining composure.

    “Ew!” cried Desiree’. “Hit that little ghoul with a Peck!”

    “Counter with Night Shade,” said Jyharri quickly.

    Combusken’s beak began to glow as Gastly’s eyes began to glow red. Jumping into the air again, Combusken made himself an easy target. A black beam fired from Gastly’s glowing eyes, hitting Combusken in the side. The Young Fowl Pokémon fell backwards, landing on his rear. Jumping up quickly, Combusken showed a look of agitation. He began to stomp his feet and flail his arms around madly.

    “He’s beside himself with anger,” Jyharri told Gastly. “If we fire an attack now he’ll be a sitting duck or rather a sitting chicken. Go for another Night Shade.”

    Once more Gastly’s eyes turned a bright red. Just before the attack could be launched a loud blaring noise sounded. Looking towards the docks, a ship was stationed there, steam billowing out of its smoke stacks. Quickly turning back to the battle Jyharri waved his hand to Desiree’.

    “Sorry to leave this battle unfinished but Gastly and I need to jet,” he told her. “Let’s make tracks buddy!”

    With a nod to his opponents Gastly floated after Jyharri, staying right behind him as they made their way to the ship.

    --------------------------------------------

    “Just a few more hours or so and we’ll be docked in Olivine City. After that it will be just a short train ride until we’re home. Once we’ve settled in we can begin training.”

    After a few hours on the ship, the students headed back to Johto were now in the middle of the sea. The sky had changed to a dark purple color, the clouds covering nearly the entire sky. In the distance a small strip of land was able to be seen, the sun hiding just behind the mountains of said land strip. Jyharri had been on deck with his Gastly looking out at the ocean.

    “We’re getting closer to the Whirl Islands,” Jyharri told Gastly. “You can tell by how the water is beginning to form small whirlpools. Like right there.”

    Gastly followed Jyharri’s finger to a small part of the water. The water seemed to be going down a drain, swirling in a hypnotic fashion. Suddenly Gastly began looking at the water with a focus that Jyharri had never seen.

    “Is something wrong?” asked Jyharri.

    Gastly simply nodded at the water, unable to point. Jyharri now focused on the water as well, ready for anything. Just as they passed another whirlpool a large shadow appeared under it. The shadow was in the shape of a large bird.

    “What is that?!” exclaimed Jyharri.

    The bird extended its wings, showing its magnificent wing span. Its wings were more like hands, the ends of them seeming more like fingers. Once the creature closed its wings onto its body spine like protrusions began to stand up all along its back. The bird creature flew forward in the water, disappearing in the dark sea.

    “What in the world-?!” gasped Jyharri, unable to comprehend what happened. “Did you see that Gastly?”

    Gastly nodded, still looking at the water. A few minutes after the creature was out of sight the boat began to rumble. Rocking back and forth, students stumbled across the deck, many Pokémon doing the same. After a quick lurch Jyharri fell forward, falling over the railing. With reactions as quick as a Glameow, Jyharri grabbed onto the deck below the railing with his right hand, hanging on for dear life.

    “Attention students,” boomed a voice over an intercom, “get inside your rooms now! It is unsafe on the deck! We’ve hit some large whirlpools! They seem to have come out of nowhere!”

    Once the announcement was made red lights shot out everywhere as trainers began to recall their Pokémon. In an attempt to save his trainer Gastly flew over the railing, grabbing the back of Jyharri’s blazer with his mouth. With the little boost, Jyharri managed to make it up onto the railing.

    “Gastly it’s too dangerous for you out here,” Jyharri yelled over the commotion of the students and staff retreating to the lower levels of the boat. Pulling out a Pokéball, Jyharri enlarged it, recalling Gastly. “I need to find out what’s happening! These whirlpools don’t seem natural!”

    Pulling out another Pokéball, Jyharri was right about to toss it into the air when the boat gave another lurch. Even though Jyharri managed to keep his grip on the railing his Pokéball flew out of his hand, plummeting towards the ocean.

    “CHARIZARD!” screamed Jyharri.

    Without thinking Jyharri lunged after the Pokéball. Reaching out, the young Fire Red student barely touched the ball with the tips of his fingers. A fearful look in his eyes, Jyharri used every muscle in his arm to extend his reach, grasping the ball just before they hit the dark waters. A large splash erupted out of the water once the boy crashed into the surface. Without any energy to spare Jyharri began to sink towards the ocean floor slowly as his vision began to become blurry. Holding onto the Pokéball like it was his life line, Jyharri’s vision went black as he passed out.

    --------------------------------------------

    What’s that bright light? Didn’t I just crash into the ocean? There’s no light in the ocean!

    Once the light became brighter Jyharri saw he was in a room no larger than his dorm. A burning sensation quickly made its way up his throat, water spewing out onto his legs as he coughed, his body bolting up right. Looking around him, Jyharri noticed he was lying on a bed, the sheets soaked with water. His clothes had also been soaked, his hair now a tangled black mess.

    “So you’re finally up,” a suave voice said from Jyharri’s left.

    Quickly turning Jyharri saw a boy who appeared to be older than he was. He wore a similar school blazer, but his was blue in color and the sleeves were cut off to reveal toned arms. A toothpick was placed in the left corner of his mouth, the point slightly protruding. After a quick observation Jyharri noticed he was drenched as well, his shoulder length blonde hair slicked back.

    “Man I thought you would never wake up,” the boy said.

    “Who are you?” Jyharri questioned, swinging his legs around to the side of the bed.

    “I go by Biff,” he said jabbing his thumb into his chest.

    “How did I get here?” Jyharri continued with the questions.

    Biff began to laugh as he sat next to Jyharri. “It’s a funny story really. Right after they made the announcement to go into the rooms I was right about to recall my Pidgeot. That’s when I heard a big splash. I ran over to the railing and had my Pidgeot fetch you out of the water.”

    “Thanks for saving me, but I have one more question for you,” said Jyharri. “How long have I been out?”

    Instead of answering the question Biff simply stood and pulled Jyharri to the door of the room. Once they emerged onto the deck, Jyharri saw that the clouds had disappeared and the sun had been shining brightly in the east. The water had now become a light blue, reflecting the sky’s color. A loud blaring signaled the boat docking in the port town of Olivine City, more smoke billowing out of the stacks.

    “Thanks for rescuing me,” Jyharri said to Biff again once they were on the docks.

    “Don’t mention it. I’m just glad I got to help out a fellow citizen of Johto. I’ll be seeing you around, well at least at school next term.”

    With a wave Biff began to walk towards the beaches while Jyharri picked his backpack up, slinging it onto his back. Walking towards the city he had a smile on his face as memories of the past year began to play over in his mind.

    “Next stop Blackthorn City,” Jyharri whispered to himself.

    --------------------------------------------

    Stepping off the train into the Blackthorn station made Jyharri’s heart beat faster than usual. Meeting up with Jessica and Genevieve on the train, the three exited the station. For the first time in a year Jyharri smelled the burnt charcoal smell of Blackthorn once again.

    “It’s been quite a while since we’ve been back,” Jessica said as she began to observe their hometown.

    “Nothing has changed at all,” Genevieve said. “It’s still the same as it’s always been.”

    “Genevieve!” shouted a deep voice.

    When the three friends looked for the source of the voice they saw a large man running towards them with a petite woman jogging behind him. The man wore a brown shirt with a picture of Genevieve on it with who seemed to be his wife wearing the same thing.

    “Mom, Dad!” Genevieve cried as tears began to form in her eyes. Running to meet them, Genevieve jumped onto her father, throwing her arms around his neck. “I missed you guys so much!”

    “It’s good to see you too Jyharri, Jessica,” Genevieve’s mom said addressing the other two, tears in her eyes as well.

    “Same to you Mrs. Jenkins,” Jessica said as she waved. “Nice skirt by the way.”

    Mrs. Jenkins looked down at the long skirt she wore, floral patterns consistent all over. “Well Jim insisted we match and he challenged me when he wore his old surfing shorts. You know Jessica; I think you’ll like that woman’s pants even more.”

    Mrs. Jenkins pointed behind Jessica with a smile, wiping the tears from her eyes. Jessica did yet another spin, coming face to face with a woman that looked very similar to her. Jessica’s mouth fell open, letting out a small scream.

    “Mom,” she exclaimed, hugging her mom closely. “I thought you weren’t going to be here for another hour!”

    “I couldn’t miss my little girl arriving now could I?” her mom asked as she patted her back.

    “Where’s Dad?” Jessica asked, pulling away from her mom a little.

    “He had to be at work early so he couldn’t make it,” explained Jessica’s mom. “Jyharri it’s been a while since I’ve seen you! You’ve grown into such a handsome young man.”

    “Thank you,” was all Jyharri could say. “I’m sorry, but I must go.”

    With a quick bow to all of the parents Jyharri headed into the city. Almost all of the buildings he passed had a chimney with smoke rising out of it. The difference between Blackthorn and most cities was that, despite being big, Blackthorn had no cars or gas powered vehicles. The townspeople all got around on foot and travelers either got in through the Ice Path or by using the Magnet Train. A sense of nostalgia came over Jyharri as he walked through the city. Many of the passing people greeted him even though he had never seen them in his life.

    “Here we are,” Jyharri said once he arrived in front of a small two story house.

    Pulling out a set of keys, Jyharri placed one into the door. Once he unlocked the door his heart began to race. Stepping in he felt at ease, something he never felt anywhere else. It was a feeling you could only get at home.

    (Listen to this song. Just click here.)

    Pokemon Academy: Dedication Through Light and Darkness

    FIN
    Credit goes to MagicMochi. Check out their shop.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sidewinder
    While it is very reminiscent of a lot of journey trainer fics, it held my attention. It stands out among a lot of the other fics I've read lately and I'm excited to continue the story.

  8. #208
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    Good finished. It's a bit sad the story has ended but I guess all stories must come to an end eventually. Anyways I didn't much wrong with it, I actually though Jyharri would fall into the water and drown or something, it's a rather nice ending.
    Claims Amber Benson and Ali Larter as Bishie.


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    And so the fifth generation begins...

  9. #209
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  10. #210
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    Cool Final review... START!

    Well, we're finally here. Every road must have it's end, and this was something new.

    It was a good finish, although Jyharri playing Indy was a bit much. Guess he can't really helpp it, being a rebel and all, but seriously... he needs to get a grip.

    Too tired to note where your possible errors lie this time (that and the fact that I didn't catch that many), so i'll let you off easy.

    Well, good fic, good end. I really can't say fairer than that. we'll see how well your sequel goes (Judging by the way you give Jyharri's Gastly this much exposure at the end suggests little else... )

    Good job, mate.

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  11. #211
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    I guess I can afford to give you a quick review.

    I was a bit bored to be honest, there was a stark lack of description and not enough "slow down lets take this in," moments that would be characteristic of a fic's conclusion.

    I have to agree with AD here on this one, there isnt much to say, and I don't fault you for that, this chapter was neccessary to wrap up the story and bridge to the sequel, but I will leave with a few closing remarks.

    First, for the sequel, actually take our advice please. AD, Silawen and I are here to help, and what we have to say has merit. You're going to want to work on description and characters in your sequel. Jyharri can't be this much of a stu.

    Second, this was by no means a bad fic. I thought it was a very interesting read, with a decent concept. Just some fundamental flaws.

    Congrats on finishing, decent journey fics usually arent finished on this forum. I'm proud.

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