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Thread: Dimensions of Darkness Book 2: The Explorers of the Core

  1. #201
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    Quote Originally Posted by Torpoleon View Post
    I think I know the foreshadowing. The banner you had for Book 3 had a Deoxys. I think something involves Depxys and maybe Ho-Oh, Lugia, Entei, Raikou, Suicune, Kyogre, Groudon, Rayquaza and Giratina! I'm excited for more! I wonder what happened with Grovyle since Piplup and Chimchar gasped in horror.
    I will confirm to you that Deoxys, Lugia, and Raikou will all appear in Book 3, but I'm not telling what roles they'll play or how big a part they'll have until then. And I'm really sorry about how short that chapter was. I was going to have to shut down my computer before long and had to wrap things up quickly. I promise that the next chaper will be longer.
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  2. #202

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    Aw... I missed all the fun voting again ;_;

    Short, but if all that Mew said is really like a story (with all the diagrams and stuff), it might go up to 30 minutes... I think?

    Oh, by the way:

    Quote Originally Posted by GalladeRocks
    "Stared right into an illusion of it," Chimchar corrected."
    What's with the extra quotation mark?

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  3. #203
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    Ooh! It's a nice, quick chapter.

    Aw... I missed all the fun voting again ;_;
    Don't worry, I missed it too. >_>

    Keep it up, can't wait for the next chapter!
    on a hiatus at the moment.

  4. #204
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    have you caught the short chapter syndrome, perchance? but still, good chapter, if a bit short. (almost missed it!)
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  5. #205
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mi10ticFan View Post
    What's with the extra quotation mark?
    Oh, thanks for pointing that out. I'll go get it fixed.
    Dimensions of Darkness l harmoNy l Envoy - Coming Soon!

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  6. #206
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    It's ok that the chapter was short. We still learned a lot and you said that there was a lot of foreshadowing in Chapter 19. It is also called "Facts and Legends". I wonder why Piplup and Chimchar gasped when they saw Grovyle at the end of Chapter 19 though.
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  7. #207
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    Giratina's back... Weird, I never really thought of Giratina as evil. And Yeah, there was obviously tons of foreshadowing in this, so... I bet there's going to be a big war: Some trios sidw with Giratina, some side with Piplup and Co. And Rayquaza is still a bit odd. Well, great chappie!
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  8. #208
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    Ok, guys, I've got yet another matter for you to vote on. I'm sure that most, if not all of you, have seen and read about Zorua and Zoroark. Therefore, I would like to ask: Should I include them somewhere in Dimensions of Darkness?
    Dimensions of Darkness l harmoNy l Envoy - Coming Soon!

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  9. #209
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    Quote Originally Posted by GalladeRocks View Post
    Ok, guys, I've got yet another matter for you to vote on. I'm sure that most, if not all of you, have seen and read about Zorua and Zoroark. Therefore, I would like to ask: Should I include them somewhere in Dimensions of Darkness?

    Yeah dude!, You should Have Zoroark have a Past with Chimchar that would be interesting like he was the one that gave chimchar the relic fragment along time ago.

  10. #210
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    I didn't like it. The story wouldn't cause a giggle in me, just a smile at most.

    But I think you got away with simple characters and low narration because that's exactly what you wanted. You aimed for younger readers that would take amusement to the story's dialogue, they liked it. I can't put up with it because I've heard it before and my classmates echoed such phrases in school.
    In terms of literature you probably would fail with that story if you tried giving it to an adult reader; but for the younger readers, that are in their teens or just starting, you did it for them. And thanks, because I like it when readers start young and become more educated. You might have it in you for writing children's books or young literature, but I can't advise more than this because I haven't read that level of literature since I was 11 or less.

    You just keep it funny and loose, or whatever you do, and I think you'll get better at entertaining this audience. Good story for the young ones.
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  11. #211
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    @Mudkip43-Interesting idea! There's an area of the plot which I hadn't yet given consideration...I may very well use that sometime later!

    @Akiyama-Thanks for your comments. I always tell myself that I need more description, better narration, longer paragraphs, less dialogue, that kind of thing, but I always fall flat on my face. I aspire to be an author as an adult, but I'm sticking to things similar to children's books right now. Actually, my mom has a friend who's an author, and she's been giving me pointers, so that's been going pretty well. Hopefully someday, you'll be reading a novel by me, but as for now...Well, let's just say that people are lucky to be getting this. The other stories I've written were all short, and they were about dragons, monsters, and Ellis Island, so fan-fiction was a new step for me. And, one final comment: Thank you for giving me a negative review without being mean about it. I know a few reviewers who could learn a thing or two (or even more than that) from you.
    Dimensions of Darkness l harmoNy l Envoy - Coming Soon!

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  12. #212
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    Much appreciated.
    My review was negative because I am older and more tuned to serious stories, but I thought about the kind of people that read this. You wrote what I think is just right for kids, but I don't know much about that level. Well, certainly I hope I'll have a novel written by you in the future.

    I do have a busy life sometimes, so I don't come on all the time. As for what reviewers could learn from me, I haven't seen many reviews so I wonder what's wrong. Oh well, keep going, you got a lot of readers.
    Anyone ought to be free to own whatever ordnance they can afford - provided they don't harm others. Outlaw the nukes and only outlaws will have nukes.
    You already have what you want. Only outlaws [states] have nukes.


    The extreme has been stated.

  13. #213
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    Mew and Dusknoir led the way deeper into the ruins, until they came into a small room with a fire lit in the middle. A shadowy figure lay slumped beside it. Piplup and Chimchar gasped in horror. "Grovyle!"

    I was like, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! GROVYLE!!! NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Then I was like, Wait a sec, Grovyle can't die! Eh, he's probably just messing with Piplup and Chimchar.

    Right?
    Anyways, rockin' story! Can't wait for Ch.20!
    Grovyle is awesome. So is Celebi. 'Nuff said.



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  14. #214
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    Wow! It's just so interesting! Add me to the PM List please, so I know when there's a new chapter out! Also It's well written so keep up the good work!


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  15. #215
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    @DaggerThruMyHeart911-Don't worry, Grovyle's not dead...yet.

    @GlaeceonLover1-You're on the PM list!

    @Akiyama-Thank you for your support!
    Dimensions of Darkness l harmoNy l Envoy - Coming Soon!

    Sgt. Froakie - Coming Soon! l humaniZed - Coming Soon! l The Piplup and Chimchar Variety Hour
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    Latest Chapter: Chapter 24 (In the Shadows)
    Credit to PKMNRookie for the awesome Avatar Sig!

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  16. #216
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    Zoroark NEEDS to be in the story. Zoroark could even be with Zorua, living together somwhere. If they are bad, just make them fight using Dark type moves like Bite for Zorua and Dark Pulse for Zoroark. Still one of the best fanfics!


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  17. #217
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mudkip8003 View Post
    Zoroark NEEDS to be in the story. Zoroark could even be with Zorua, living together somwhere. If they are bad, just make them fight using Dark type moves like Bite for Zorua and Dark Pulse for Zoroark. Still one of the best fanfics!
    We barely know anything about Zorua and Zoroark. I think that GalladeRocks would have those and future Generation V Pokemon in his stories when English names and moves are revealed.

    Can't wait for the weekend! That's when Chapter 20 will be up the latest!
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  18. #218
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    It would be nice to see Zorua and Zoroark but like Torpoleon said it would be better to wait until there US Debuts but I guess its Up to Gallade for what he wants to do. Another thing Chimchar and Piplup are going to stay unevolved arent they.

  19. #219
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    Zorua and/or Zoroark needs to be in the story. They're just so awesome looking.
    And I hope you're just trying to creep me out, cuz you succeeded in doing that... 0.o
    Last edited by DaggerThruMyHeart911; 13th February 2010 at 12:30 AM.
    Grovyle is awesome. So is Celebi. 'Nuff said.



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  20. #220
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    Ok, I've done quite a bit of planning. I have a minor role which Zorua could fit into, but I'm still debating. I also have a minor-supporting role for Zoroark, though once again, I'm still debating. Basically, one way or another, Zorua and Zoroark will both get at least minor appearances. However, they probably won't appear until Book 3.
    Dimensions of Darkness l harmoNy l Envoy - Coming Soon!

    Sgt. Froakie - Coming Soon! l humaniZed - Coming Soon! l The Piplup and Chimchar Variety Hour
    Author's Profile

    Latest Chapter: Chapter 24 (In the Shadows)
    Credit to PKMNRookie for the awesome Avatar Sig!

    Pokemon Soulsilver Nuzlocke Challenge

    Bonnie, Samba, Cinders, Shawn, Sherlock, Yukon
    Badges: 7 l Deaths: 4

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