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Thread: The Bleach Club...2.

  1. #1276
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    well here we go. got nothing else to do so here we go. sidenote: deciced not to go with a prolouge and instead go straight to chapter one

        Spoiler:- Chapter One: Corruption pt.1:


    Wow. Damn that took a while. Well the plot is already in motion. If you can figure it out you win ten cookies from Arc. And to NL and Zam the fights you two took place in weren't covered because they really don't change the plot much. Now all of you i want to know what you think. Positive and negative reviews greatly accepted. And on that note I haven't really thought of a title for the story. Title suggestions also greatly accepted. Corruption is the name of the first two chapters.
    Last edited by kusari; 23rd May 2010 at 5:34 AM.
    Hey, you! Yeah, you! No, not you in front, you there who likes pokémon. Do you like the animé? Do you ever think you'd like to use pokémon and battle like they do in the show?

    Look no further than the
    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    Come say hello in our Chat Thread and we'll help you Get Started on a wonderful adventure. Training pokémon, fighting Gym Leaders, maybe even catching a Legendary Pokemon? The choice is yours!

    We're a friendly bunch. We don't bite. What more could you want!


    ASB: Trainer Level 4 -- All Around Terrible Battler

  2. #1277
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    Fanfiction frenzy. I suppose I'll skip voting and stick with the ONE vote i got (over PM too -_-)

    We should, like, totally start a fanfiction Club lol.

    anyone else notice how NL writes her character's relations to the others

    Writing Prologue!

        Spoiler:- The Super Robot War Prologue (Cliche title ftw!):


    What do you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by Northern Lights View Post
    I have that effect on most men for some reason. no wonder i've been feeling lesbian lately >.>

  3. #1278
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    Emcee: It looks fine... I guess. Continue writing

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
    I made Shinigami Bio Sheets [i was bored] ~ HERE

    My example is here
    Ohhh that looks neat. Wish I could do one, but I can't draw my character. XD

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post

        Spoiler:- Begining of the Inverted Souls Arc:

    That's funny, I just chatted with him. XP

    Fruitcake, lol. You're quite right there

    Woah. rotrum never laughs, ever since I knew him. Nice to know that he can *runs away from his daggers*

    Why was there 2 p from Ilppy?

    The final part was funny. XD

    Sooo does this mean you're not continuing on your Kuchikukan fanfic? hmmm..
    But this one looks good too. Want to see more.

    Quote Originally Posted by VizardBlue View Post
        Spoiler:- Prologue: Oh Son of a Bi-:
    Well... that was short, but I'd like to see more.
    That guardian part was funny.

    You know, the first thing that comes to mind with the name Cameron is... Camerupt.

    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    well here we go. got nothing else to do so here we go. sidenote: deciced not to go with a prolouge and instead go straight to chapter one

        Spoiler:- Chapter One: Corruption pt.1:


    Wow. Damn that took a while. Well the plot is already in motion. If you can figure it out you win ten cookies from Arc..
    Oh yeah. You hate being woken up. XDD

    "Again"? Sounds like you do that.... a lot of times. Hmmm..

    I can't figure it out myself, so I'll raise the offer to 15. XP Except maybe... they're torturing you to get some information.. But why the Hollow then? Vizards? With the title corruption, I guess that's it. Amirite?

    Quote Originally Posted by rotrum View Post
    Fanfiction frenzy. I suppose I'll skip voting and stick with the ONE vote i got (over PM too -_-)

    We should, like, totally start a fanfiction Club lol.

    anyone else notice how NL writes her character's relations to the others

    Writing Prologue!

        Spoiler:- The Super Robot War Prologue (Cliche title ftw!):


    What do you think?
    There's already a fanfiction club... heh heh. But you're right there;
    1. Dac
    2. Emcee
    3. NL
    4. You
    5. kusari
    6. VB
    7. Eon

    Now that's a lot......... And like MC/Dac/NL/you have more than 1 fiction... though they weren't continued...

    Okay....


    1. Too many acronyms >.<
    2. You should try separating the first paragraph into smaller parts. It was too long @.@
    3. Hmmm... How to put this... Can you like convert the way you convey all the facts? Straightaway facts are soooo boring which was why I effing hate History so you can like turn them into a dialogue between 2 people, flashback etc...


    You know what.... We seem to use NL a lot in our first chapters. I did, and Dac did, and kusari too.... Why are you so famous NL? XD

    I was surprised Zam did not comment on last week's episode... Unless I missed his post. He usually does.
    Last edited by arceus03; 23rd May 2010 at 6:20 AM.


  4. #1279
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    I actually came online to post the next chapter to my story, but now I figure, I should probably wait until people have read and digested the new stories popping up =)

    By far my favourite is NL's!!!! (we all saw that coming). But I like her writing style, and the fact that I am prominent within it. Also, what I especially like is that the dialogue seems real. Someone says something, the other person reacts. It does not feel scripted in the sense that you cannot predict what a character will say, unless you know the character.

    Rotrum; your story has waaaay to many acronyms and is bordering on sci-fi. I guess its just not my flavour, but I am interested to see where it goees and how long you will keep to it

    Kusari; I like your writing style, though I must say, you have a few typos. I like the plotline so far and I am looking forward to seeing it develop. The characters seem slightly 2D and the dialogue seemed too... i dunnno how to put it. Too scripted. I could predict what everyone would say before they said it because it seemed like each character had the same personality. But I like it and I cant wait to see what you do with it. I am sure it will develop as it progresses.

    VizardBlue; interesting start. cant wait to see where it goes.

    MC15; i like how you kept the names hidden so that we would have to guess who is who from the personalities you gave them or assume it was a previous squad. I like how the story line is going and how real things are seeming so far. I cant wait for the next chapter. a suspensful ending ~ classic

    you die in the first chapter. lol
    so mean!!! lol

    ... where to start, actually, because it would amuse you too much and i'm having a lazy day marking tests i won't bother even starting
    you take the fun out of my life

  5. #1280
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    well thanks for saying ya liked it. ok response time. i'll start with...

    Da.C: i get what you're saying about the scriptedness. before i write the next chapter i'm gonna have one of my freinds, who has always been a good writer and is currently working on his own book, take a look and give me notes. as for the typos i know. when i read back through it i was just to lazy to fix them. next time i'm gonna type it in word and run spell check over it. and when i wrote your place i had just woken up.

    Arc: ah hah you caught the all importent part: i like my sleep. the "did it again" part was just for fun. and honestly that's what my uncle does when he gets drunk. i was drunk the night before the chap if you didn't infer that already. and as for the plot i'll call and raise you to twenty for being close with the vaizard thing. i can assure you i will not be interrogated. i have a feeling you'll get where i'm going with it after the next chapter. and if you noticed i already named my villain.

    NL and Zam: if you read this i want your input considering you were in the chapter. and if there's anyway i could improve you in the story i'd like to know.

    Also i'm looking for volunteers. i need four for what i'm planning and you won't know for what until i write it.

    and on my last note i have character descriptions of some of you but not all. these are the ones i have NL, Arc, Zam, ILP, MC and Senny. please any others ASAP.
    Hey, you! Yeah, you! No, not you in front, you there who likes pokémon. Do you like the animé? Do you ever think you'd like to use pokémon and battle like they do in the show?

    Look no further than the
    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    Come say hello in our Chat Thread and we'll help you Get Started on a wonderful adventure. Training pokémon, fighting Gym Leaders, maybe even catching a Legendary Pokemon? The choice is yours!

    We're a friendly bunch. We don't bite. What more could you want!


    ASB: Trainer Level 4 -- All Around Terrible Battler

  6. #1281
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    @NL

    Very nice first Chapter.

    @Arc

    Kida is cool, thats why...
    Thanks.

    @Rotrum
    ...what?
    It was well...informative...>,<

    @Kusari
    Intresting.

        Spoiler:- Chapter 1: Revenge and Rebirth, part 2:

  7. #1282

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    All of these fanfics... All the spelling mistakes... I was half willing to write a (non-bleach) fanfic, but now... No way.

    Right, better start reviewing.


    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
    ^that's because Division 12 IS the science and research division - it's expected that any abnormalities would originate from there.
    Well, that's true. And I'm on good terms with.... Pretty much everyone in the club, it seems.


    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
        Spoiler:- Begining of the Inverted Souls Arc:
    One thing to note is that I read this yesterday and I feel it'd be somewhat redundant to read it again just before reviewing (since I can remember most, which skim-reading will help with). But overall, I really like the dialouge and everyone's reactions. I don't really have much else to say, except that I'm wondering how Senny will be involved with the evil villain.

    Blue, I've already gave a review for your chapter when I helped out with spelling and stuff.

    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
        Spoiler:- Chapter One: Corruption pt.1:
    I quite liked that first chapter. It's interesting to see a new take on the Espadas/Arrancars (with the "hollow mask" being more of a piece of armour). Though I'd like to see how these Arrancar are made, and why Zam and NL knew about them.
    I think that Yasushi Hayashi and Hayate Zakei are the same people 8O.

    Quote Originally Posted by rotrum View Post
        Spoiler:- The Super Robot War Prologue (Cliche title ftw!):
    Okay, the first chapter was a HUGE giant wall of text. I barely got through half way before I got really tired. I think you really need to fix that up first. I think maybe after a bit, I'll read it again, and then give a proper review on the plot.
    Quote Originally Posted by arceus03 View Post
    Why was there 2 p from Ilppy?
    Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that. Why ARE there 2 Ps in Ilppy?

    Quote Originally Posted by arceus03 View Post
    You know, the first thing that comes to mind with the name Cameron is... Camerupt.
    I think of David Cameron XD

    Quote Originally Posted by arceus03 View Post
    There's already a fanfiction club... heh heh. But you're right there;
    1. Dac
    2. Emcee
    3. NL
    4. You
    5. kusari
    6. VB
    7. Eon
    Not to mention you and Golde, too.


    Quote Originally Posted by arceus03 View Post
    3. Hmmm... How to put this... Can you like convert the way you convey all the facts? Straightaway facts are soooo boring which was why I effing hate History so you can like turn them into a dialogue between 2 people, flashback etc...
    I like the idea of rewriting that first first into pieces of dialouge, or flashbacks. It definitely would make it more digestable.


    Quote Originally Posted by arceus03 View Post
    You know what.... We seem to use NL a lot in our first chapters. I did, and Dac did, and kusari too.... Why are you so famous NL? XD
    As well as me, quite a lot. Though I guess as the Token Girl (TM) and the Mad Scientist (TM) it's to be expected.

    Quote Originally Posted by MasterCharizard15 View Post
        Spoiler:- Chapter 1: Revenge and Rebirth, part 2:
    I think you definitely portrayed Blue right, energetic, wanting to fight... Then again, we've been hanging out with him a lot recently XD.
    As for you having those bodyguards... I'm assuming that they'll be important to the story? And have you posted their designs in the club? So that everyone knows what they look like...

    "Oddly, he was soaking his feet as well," you really don't know how much I lol'd at that. Which reminds me, I probably should, too.

    Hearing myself think is never a good thing... My thoughts aren't the most pleasant thing in the world.

    "That has as much of a chance as you not wearing that hat."
    Definitely the way I'd react to that. Yes, yes.

    I don't actually mind being called Ant, since I guess I'm used to it And Ed officially gave me that.

    I think the last 2 scenes seemed quite... Bare. They were only, what, 2 lines long? I think some description, especially with the second-last part, would be really good.
    YOU JUST LOST THE GAME!
    Click HERE to be rickrolled... c'mon, you know you want to.
        Spoiler:- I HAVE DEFIED ALL MATHS AND LOGIC!:


  8. #1283
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    first off thank you to everyone who mentioned my tiredness and you can understand why by looking at the times of my last few posts. anyway time for the real reason i'm posting:

    Ant: good inquiry about Hayashi and Zakei being the same person. there is just one fatal flaw Yasushi Hayashi is the name i use for myself in fanfics and i was kidnapped and force fed hollows by Zakei's underlings. and the whole mask armor thing is caused by the particular means of arrancar creation i chose. and trust me in the next chapter NL and Zam's knowledge of the arrancars and Espada is revealed. its a wierd thing you know and who explains all weird things? as for my volunteers i'd like you to be one of them.

    MC: what was interesting about it?
    Last edited by kusari; 23rd May 2010 at 11:42 AM.
    Hey, you! Yeah, you! No, not you in front, you there who likes pokémon. Do you like the animé? Do you ever think you'd like to use pokémon and battle like they do in the show?

    Look no further than the
    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    Come say hello in our Chat Thread and we'll help you Get Started on a wonderful adventure. Training pokémon, fighting Gym Leaders, maybe even catching a Legendary Pokemon? The choice is yours!

    We're a friendly bunch. We don't bite. What more could you want!


    ASB: Trainer Level 4 -- All Around Terrible Battler

  9. #1284
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    Thanks for the comments guys, i've got the plot lined up already, so it's just whether my brain and the plot bunnies can kick my motivation into gear. Oh, just as an added thing, my Spell Checker is set to English [UK], so words may be spelt differently from American ones.

    Quote Originally Posted by Arceus
    Why was there 2 p from Ilppy?
    Because spelling the same sound it creates like 'Ilpy' doesn't look right, so it's 'Ilp' 'py'

    Quote Originally Posted by Arceus
    You know what.... We seem to use NL a lot in our first chapters. I did, and Dac did, and kusari too.... Why are you so famous NL? XD
    I noticed that too - i'm flattered =]

    Quote Originally Posted by Arceus
    Sooo does this mean you're not continuing on your Kuchikukan fanfic? hmmm..
    I forget which one that was, but i think this story is pretty much just a heavily edited version, with a few tweaks in the plot

    EDIT; Ah, i remember now - yes, this is just a heavily edited re-write, the Kuchikukan would have had the same outcome as this story, it's just the means to which we arrive at that situation have changed

    Kuchikukan, Destroyer = Sakasama Tamashii, Inverted Soul [逆さま神]

    Quote Originally Posted by ILP
    except that I'm wondering how Senny will be involved with the evil villain.
    You'll just have to see.

    Vizard; your's was a bit hard to follow and grasp in the first instance, you should usually include and opening line, just to set the scene first, then get into the nitty gritty.

    Kusari; XD you got me so well, i bite Zameric, actually i do that in real life, i bite people when they annoy me, then again so does my best mate soo.... rock, paper, scissors, i would totally do that, and lose.

    Rotrum; same as what other have said, HUGE block of text, try breaking it up a little, it makes it easier on the eyes =]
    Last edited by Northern Lights; 23rd May 2010 at 12:03 PM.

  10. #1285
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    Quote Originally Posted by MasterCharizard15 View Post
    @NL


    ~Even though it is hated, despair manages to be one of the most memorable experiences in life.~

    The day before the attack the Soul Society was bussiness as usual. The weather was clear and peaceful. The Squads were running smoothly and there haven't been any attacks or hollows for weeks.

    "I"M BORED"! yelled the 7th Squad's Lieutenant. He was average hieght for his age and his blue hair contrasted against his pale. He was the newest lieutenant and the loudest.

    "I"M TRYING TO SLEEP! GO PESTER YOUR OWN CAPTAIN!" the 13th Squad's Captain yelled out in irritation. Oddly, he was the newest Captain and joined around the same time as the 7th Lieutenant, he used a simple kido spell to blast the lieutenant away.

    'WEE!" The Lietenant yelled as he soared across the Seireitei, landing in Squad 6's court yard. The court yard was void of any other Shinigami, other then the one that crashed in.

    "I wonder where everyone is?" he asked himself.

    "Their jobs, like you should be..." said the 6th Squad Captain. A few inches taller then the lieutenant, he stood their with an air of noblility.

    "...but thats so boring...hey, I have an idea! LETS FIGHT!" Exclaimed the now hyperactive Lietenant, he placed his hand on his Zanpaktou...only to be pinned down and having three swords pointed toward his heck, neck and hand.

    "What the...what the hell just happenned!?!" The Lieutenant demanded to know.

    " My own personal guards...they tend to do that when you try to attack me. " The Squad 6 Captain said in an bored tone.

    There were three of them, two males and one female, though it was nearly impossible to tell due to their unifoms covering their entire body, aside from the eyes. The blood red coloring of the uniform brought attention to their eyes, blue, green and brown.

    "Shall I terminate him?" the blue eyed one asked in a serious tone.

    "No, he is harmless, let him go." He said staring at the sky.

    "HARMLESS!?!" The lieutenant shouted outraged and offended.


    "You may want to leave, my lieutenant will be here an second now, you don't wnat a repeat of that incident now do you?"

    "I'm still paying off the damages too, fine." The lieutenant left in flash, shunpoing back to his own division.
    -


    [/SPOILER]
    First of all, in the bold quotes, that is TOTTALY, how i would react. you know me well, MC. Infact, other then the fact i would say Woohoo instead of wee, those would be my EXACT reactions to those different things! woo! And Ant hearing himself think? Dear god man, are you trying to send us into pandemonium?! And Nyah! you PROMISED you wouldn't use the body guards on me! T_T
    [IMG]http://i27.*******.com/2rwuxs7.jpg[/IMG]

    Quote Originally Posted by ILP

    We're Mad.
    Our 1st Squad Captain has an insane sweet tooth
    Our 2nd Squad Captain is some super-ninja
    Our 3rd Squad Captain is part wolf
    Our 4th Squad Captain bakes cookies and cuts up anyone who makes him mad
    Our 5th Squad Captain is some party-crazy army man
    Our 6th Squad Captain is calm, prideful and pervy
    Our 7th Squad Captain seems to be, barely, the only sane one
    Our 8th Squad Captain is missing
    Our 9th Squad Captain is a shy, respectful, boring and pervy
    Our 10th Squad Captain hates some of our OWN captains
    Our 11th Squad Captain is a sadistic maniac
    Our 12th Squad Captain is an insane nerd
    Our 13th Squad Captain is sleeping

    That's Gotei 13

  11. #1286

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    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    Ant: good inquiry about Hayashi and Zakei being the same person. there is just one fatal flaw Yasushi Hayashi is the name i use for myself in fanfics and i was kidnapped and force fed hollows by Zakei's underlings.
    We know that these Arrancars are different to the Bleach Arrancars (due to your ones having their "masks" as armour) which means that they would have had to have become an Arrancar in a different way to Bleach's way (so not using the Hougyoku, or having their masks broken off traditionally, as we know that it would produce a similar result, we know this from Grand Fisher). This new Arrancarisation could be from a "Hougyoku 2" which Captain Hayashi, who you can make to be as sneaky or villainous as possible, could have used (who knows, we could be partners in crime).

    If Captain Hayashi DID have a "Hougyoku 2" then it's possible that he could've used it on himself. This would mean that the force-feeding Hollows could be the equivalent of stuffing a banana in your mouth: it won't do you any harm, and you'd rather stay away from it altogether/eat it normally.

    And anyway, if I were a secret mastermind, what better person to have "taken hostage" than myself? As Aizen probably knew, it would almost entirely take him out of the equation of being the bad guy. It would be the perfect way to make Soul Society weaker and more vulnerable for attacking.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kusari
    and the whole mask armor thing is caused by the particular means of arrancar creation i chose. and trust me in the next chapter NL and Zam's knowledge of the arrancars and Espada is revealed. its a wierd thing you know and who explains all weird things?
    8D screentime woo
    Quote Originally Posted by Kusari
    as for my volunteers i'd like you to be one of them.
    volunteers for what? *Feels like I should already know this*

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
    Thanks for the comments guys, i've got the plot lined up already, so it's just whether my brain and the plot bunnies can kick my motivation into gear. Oh, just as an added thing, my Spell Checker is set to English [UK], so words may be spelt differently from American ones.
    UK spelling > US Spelling *Hides from Zam*

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
    Because spelling the same sound it creates like 'Ilpy' doesn't look right, so it's 'Ilp' 'py'.
    Eh, fair enough.



    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
    You'll just have to see.
    It feels like everyone thinks I'm trying to find out what happens in all of these stories before it does... I'm just making predictions, that's all...
    Quote Originally Posted by VizardBlue View Post
    And Ant hearing himself think? Dear god man, are you trying to send us into pandemonium?!
    Yes, it seems like it. I must never be allowed to hear myself think, or worse, tell my thoughts to someone 8O It'd make their heads explode!
    Wait... That can be my new attack! HeadSPLOSION *boom*
    YOU JUST LOST THE GAME!
    Click HERE to be rickrolled... c'mon, you know you want to.
        Spoiler:- I HAVE DEFIED ALL MATHS AND LOGIC!:


  12. #1287
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    Apparently I went from not worth commenting to overcomplication, is that a good or bad thing?

    Love how the former R&D leader is not a fan of Sci-fi. Totally makes sense

    Although usually explaining a series is gonna be long anyways -_-

    Idea 2.

    Gonna be boring, but if the idea is more appealing then the first to you all, then it’ll get more exciting next.

    And no, I don't like having actual Story in my prologues

        Spoiler:- KHR-Bleach:

    Quote Originally Posted by Northern Lights View Post
    I have that effect on most men for some reason. no wonder i've been feeling lesbian lately >.>

  13. #1288
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    We know that these Arrancars are different to the Bleach Arrancars (due to your ones having their "masks" as armour) which means that they would have had to have become an Arrancar in a different way to Bleach's way (so not using the Hougyoku, or having their masks broken off traditionally, as we know that it would produce a similar result, we know this from Grand Fisher). This new Arrancarisation could be from a "Hougyoku 2" which Captain Hayashi, who you can make to be as sneaky or villainous as possible, could have used (who knows, we could be partners in crime).

    If Captain Hayashi DID have a "Hougyoku 2" then it's possible that he could've used it on himself. This would mean that the force-feeding Hollows could be the equivalent of stuffing a banana in your mouth: it won't do you any harm, and you'd rather stay away from it altogether/eat it normally.


    i guess you could call it a hogyouku of sorts except it's not really a sphere. we couldn't be partners unless you knew about the kidnapping beforehand which you didn't. i've never stuffed a banana in my mouth. i have never been exposed to the "hogyoku" before the fight. trust swallowing 527 hollows does hurt.


    I And anyway, if I were a secret mastermind, what better person to have "taken hostage" than myself? As Aizen probably knew, it would almost entirely take him out of the equation of being the bad guy. It would be the perfect way to make Soul Society weaker and more vulnerable for attacking.

    i am making this clear for the final time Hayashi and Zakei are two completly different people.



    8D [s]screentime woo

    volunteers for what? *Feels like I should already know this*


    in my last post i asked for volunteers but not even they would know what's going to happen.


    Yes, it seems like it. I must never be allowed to hear myself think, or worse, tell my thoughts to someone 8O It'd make their heads explode!
    Wait... That can be my new attack! HeadSPLOSION *boom*


    i can work that in if you want


    my quote button didn't work the first three times i tried so i bolded ILP's original words
    Last edited by kusari; 23rd May 2010 at 3:20 PM.
    Hey, you! Yeah, you! No, not you in front, you there who likes pokémon. Do you like the animé? Do you ever think you'd like to use pokémon and battle like they do in the show?

    Look no further than the
    Pokémon Animé Style Battling League!

    Come say hello in our Chat Thread and we'll help you Get Started on a wonderful adventure. Training pokémon, fighting Gym Leaders, maybe even catching a Legendary Pokemon? The choice is yours!

    We're a friendly bunch. We don't bite. What more could you want!


    ASB: Trainer Level 4 -- All Around Terrible Battler

  14. #1289
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    Quote Originally Posted by MasterCharizard15 View Post
    @NL

    Very nice first Chapter.

    @Arc

    Kida is cool, thats why...
    Thanks.

    @Rotrum
    ...what?
    It was well...informative...>,<

    @Kusari
    Intresting.

        Spoiler:- Chapter 1: Revenge and Rebirth, part 2:
    where is my thank-you -_-

    Apparently I went from not worth commenting to overcomplication, is that a good or bad thing?

    Love how the former R&D leader is not a fan of Sci-fi. Totally makes sense
    Its a bad thing :P

    and you should see peoples faces when I tell them I can't stand star wars and they are like "But you are a science major!" and so I reply by asking if they like star wars.
    If they say yes, i am like "yeah, you look ugly enough to like it,"
    If they say no, I am like "Really? But you are ugly enough to be a star wars fan,"

    To everyone who likes star wars in this club; I mean no insult =) I just have a sharp tongue when someone makes a dumb assumption.

  15. #1290
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        Spoiler:- Chapter 2:


    Dun dun da. We all accumilate in the next chapter and Zameric becomes a hero, well sort of.
    Last edited by Northern Lights; 24th May 2010 at 2:36 PM.

  16. #1291

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    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    We know that these Arrancars are different to the Bleach Arrancars (due to your ones having their "masks" as armour) which means that they would have had to have become an Arrancar in a different way to Bleach's way (so not using the Hougyoku, or having their masks broken off traditionally, as we know that it would produce a similar result, we know this from Grand Fisher). This new Arrancarisation could be from a "Hougyoku 2" which Captain Hayashi, who you can make to be as sneaky or villainous as possible, could have used (who knows, we could be partners in crime).

    If Captain Hayashi DID have a "Hougyoku 2" then it's possible that he could've used it on himself. This would mean that the force-feeding Hollows could be the equivalent of stuffing a banana in your mouth: it won't do you any harm, and you'd rather stay away from it altogether/eat it normally.


    i guess you could call it a hogyouku of sorts except it's not really a sphere. we couldn't be partners unless you knew about the kidnapping beforehand which you didn't. i've never stuffed a banana in my mouth. i have never been exposed to the "hogyoku" before the fight. trust swallowing 527 hollows does hurt.
    Ah, but your character and mine good be really good actors

    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    I And anyway, if I were a secret mastermind, what better person to have "taken hostage" than myself? As Aizen probably knew, it would almost entirely take him out of the equation of being the bad guy. It would be the perfect way to make Soul Society weaker and more vulnerable for attacking.

    i am making this clear for the final time Hayashi and Zakei are two completly different people.
    Okay, okay, I'm just saying, it could've been possible...


    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    8D [s]screentime woo

    volunteers for what? *Feels like I should already know this*


    in my last post i asked for volunteers but not even they would know what's going to happen.
    I suppose I'll volunteer, then.

    Quote Originally Posted by kusari View Post
    Yes, it seems like it. I must never be allowed to hear myself think, or worse, tell my thoughts to someone 8O It'd make their heads explode!
    Wait... That can be my new attack! HeadSPLOSION *boom*


    i can work that in if you want
    8D
        Spoiler:- Chapter 2:
    Last edited by I like Pokemon (...); 24th May 2010 at 5:30 PM.
    YOU JUST LOST THE GAME!
    Click HERE to be rickrolled... c'mon, you know you want to.
        Spoiler:- I HAVE DEFIED ALL MATHS AND LOGIC!:


  17. #1292
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    Chapter 4 =)
    I promise everyone is going to have a fight scene, I just find it easier to do chapters on people that have really obvious personalities

    He and Seijuro took in the whole lair. Kida was scanning different methods of exits. They were in a large underground tavern. They saw different pathways surrounding them, it was as if they were in a giant block of Swiss cheese with holes everywhere. Their captors looked pretty proud of themselves as one of them went to what Seijuro assumed was the front of the tavern and made a very strange sound; it sounded like a mix between a choke and a singing cat.

    “What-” a booming voice echoed throughout the tavern. Seijuro scanned around the room looking for the source. He simply stared straight forward looking deep in thought. Kida started playing with the ropes that bound her.

    “is-” Each word seemed to come haltingly, echoing around. Their captors started shifting uncomfortably. Seijuro could feel a foreign spiritual energy, it did not belong to any soul reaper. It felt different, like the difference between coke and pepsi. It was subtle yet there. He remained impassive. Kida decided to try a spell to burn the rope.

    “it?” The final word echoed. The spiritual energy increased as whatever the creature was got closer. A giant pair of golden eyes peeped though one of the holes form above. Seijuro looked up, trying to asses what type of creature it was. Kida had finally gotten through the ropes, though she held her hands together to keep up appearances. He did not move.

    A glint of teeth was seen.

    “I see, three captain-level soul reapers. Well done. You will be rewarded in due time,” the creature echoed. Its sentences seem to have become more coherent. There was less of a pause between words. Seijuro could sense his spiritual energy lessening slowly and then it clicked. Unfortunately the men had taken away his and Kida's zanpaktous. Seijuro was unsure was to whether He even had a zanpaktou.

    “You absorb spiritual energy don't you?” Seijuro demanded. Kida groaned.

    Great, so I am officially useless? she thought to herself. Her zanpaktou was a kido-type. Her strength lay in kido. She looked towards Him. She knew His policy on releasing his zanpaktou. The last time it was ever seen released was over a hundred years ago, and even then, everyone who witnessed it died. Kida was the only person in Serebii who knew what His released form was capable of. It was Seijuro was constantly trying to find out about His release, whether by digging into archives or asking around, yet He had covered his tracks well. However this situation was not an easy one to get out of.

    Kida did not know what Seijuro's release looked like, or if he had even achieved shikai. He rose to captain-ship the same way He did it, by killing the previous captain, that way he did not have to show his released form to all the other captains as was standard procedure.

    Seijuro cursed. His zanpaktou was a kido-type. He had no idea what to do.

    He sighed and looked at Seijuro. He refused to be the one to release his zanpaktou, but it seemed like everything depended on that.

    He sliced himself out of his ropes, as they had tied his long sleeves without knowledge that he held a zanpaktou in there. He then flash stepped next to Seijuro and cut the ropes that bound him. He knew Kida had burned through hers. The men who captured them seemed relaxed however. This worried Him because it indicated that the creature, whatever it was, was going to attack head on.

    It roared, and the roar echoed throughout the cavern, but the roar did not fool the captains. It was tinged with magic, a sort of confusing spell.

    “Bakudō number seventy three!” Kida yelled. In seconds, she surrounded all three of them with a blue triangle that protected them from the confusing magic.

    “We only have a few minutes before it absorbs the energy I used to make this thing. You have got to release your zanpaktou!” Kida insisted.

    “No,” He replied.

    “But Kida and I don't even have our zanpaktou on us,” Seijuro commented

    “Oh well,” He replied.

    “YOU ARE SO STUBBORN!” Kida yelled.

    “I know,” He replied, “but watch. Three,” He started a count down. When he said “Three” nothing seemed to happen.

    “Two” The two captains looked around frantically, trying to see what would happen.

    “One” he ended.

    “Silence the eternal pain Mugen Utsuro,” It was barely audible, yet the effects of those words were clearly visible. The cavern seemed to blur, like a bad television signal. He knew how ILP's release worked. The zanpaktou that he hung around his neck elongated and curved, effectively forming a miniature scythe shape. He pulled it off with both hands and the scythe seemed to blur, and when you were able to focus on it once more, he was actually holding two miniature scythes of different colours. One being ebony and the other being ivory.

    “How did he-?” Seijuro started but decided he would ask later. It was time to win a battle.

    As Kida's spell faded, ILP threw what looked like a sugar cube at her, Him and Seijuro.

    “It rebukes his spiritual pressure absorbing ability?” He looked at His son. ILP nodded in response. The captains (and Him) sprung into action. Kida was behind the man holding her zanpaktou and whispered in his ear “Hadō number four,”. A purple light shot out from her palms, incinerating the man. She grabbed her zanpaktou before it hit the ground and unsheathed it.

    Seijuro did not move. Instead he looked at the man holding his zanpaktou and held out his hand. The zanpaktou started to vibrate. The guy holding it panicked and dropped it. In seconds Seijuro grabbed it before it hit the floor and stabbed the guy. It was now two down, three more to go, and a creature no one could understand.

    ILP and Him decided to go for the creature.

    “Hadō number ninety,” He called out. He held out His hand and watched as a black box formed around the creature, forcing it out of the whole. Just before the box closed, it looked like a black dragon. The black shadow spears hit the box and a roar echoed throughout the cavern, shaking walls and causing an army of men to come out from different passages.

    “This is huge...” ILP observed. Kida smiled. She was going to go all out.

    “Hunt Ryookami,” she commanded. Her zanpaktou started to transform. As the transformation was occurring, a wolf howl could be heard in the background and Kida's spiritual energy took the form of a wolf-dragon. As soon as the transformation was finished, she formed a series of swirls that took the overall shape of a flame and her hair suddenly turned a deep shade of red.

    “Burn you pieces of ****,” she snarled. Fire erupted all around the cavern, burning the weaker soul reapers. Seijuro took her queue and released his zanpaktou.

    “Ravage Garou,” He mouthed the words, not wanting his command to be heard by others. His zanpaktou shorted and got heavier. A hungry growl could be heard in the background and claw marks appeared on the wall opposite. He absorbed some of the fire released by Kida.

    “Hekihoukou,” he uttered. A powerful widespread blast of spiritual energy short around the cavern.

    As soon as the giant black box disappeared, ILP jumped to attack, thrusting this ebony dagger into the dragon, and the creature shrunk to the size of a chihuahua.

    “Trap it son,” He commanded. He then turned to view the scene of carnage. Rotting bodies, fires everywhere, burning corpses, spiritual balls of energy floating around, killing all it came in contact into. He sighed heavily, this was getting to messy.

    “FINISH IT UP YOU TWO!” He yelled above the screams of death echoing around the room.

    Kida increased the intensity of the flames. Smoke started to fill the cavern, choking those who were not burning. The fire seemed to form wolf shapes as they burned and bit people, and as the last person died, a howl echoed.

    She sheathed her zanpaktou, Seijuro followed suit.

    “We have a lot to explain to Golde,”

    Back in the tenth squad barracks, Rotrum sat down cursing. He killed potential informants, he had a lot of paper work to do....

    The next chapter, I need zanpaktou personality info from NL, Kusari and anyone else who has a fire based zanpaktou or one that has fire abilities.

  18. #1293
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    I guarentee chapter 1 will be up by tommorow. hopefully[/s]im lieing[/s][/s]noseriously[/s][/s]probablyonfriday[/s]. yeeep. Tommorow.

    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpaktou spirit, which one would you choose?
    Absol. Nuff said. I would quote all your stuff.. but im too lazy, don't wana figure out how, and if i do i'll wake kusari from his sleep. keh keh.

    i volunteered for kusari. what happens now? *gets thrown into a pit and expiremented on. .

        Spoiler:- Chapter 2 NL:
    [IMG]http://i27.*******.com/2rwuxs7.jpg[/IMG]

    Quote Originally Posted by ILP

    We're Mad.
    Our 1st Squad Captain has an insane sweet tooth
    Our 2nd Squad Captain is some super-ninja
    Our 3rd Squad Captain is part wolf
    Our 4th Squad Captain bakes cookies and cuts up anyone who makes him mad
    Our 5th Squad Captain is some party-crazy army man
    Our 6th Squad Captain is calm, prideful and pervy
    Our 7th Squad Captain seems to be, barely, the only sane one
    Our 8th Squad Captain is missing
    Our 9th Squad Captain is a shy, respectful, boring and pervy
    Our 10th Squad Captain hates some of our OWN captains
    Our 11th Squad Captain is a sadistic maniac
    Our 12th Squad Captain is an insane nerd
    Our 13th Squad Captain is sleeping

    That's Gotei 13

  19. #1294
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        Spoiler:- NL Chapter 2:


    @Dau.C: I'll get to yours tomorrow, I swear. Just sometime when I'm not making typos with every fourth keystroke. I can't type today at all, it's taking me twice as long...

    My fic will hopefully have its first chapter up by tomorrow, I was stuck with figuring out how to defeat my opponent in a reasonable manner, but I've managed it. Cheers all.

    -Eon Out
    "Archer, you've decided? You'll really kill him, no matter what?"
    "Go on, escape from here. I'm not going to allow you to cry anymore."



  20. #1295
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    Wow, I have quite a few fanfic chapters to catch up on once I'm done with school.
    But I'm working on my finals right now so I can't. But I will after my graduation on this Friday.

    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpakuto spirit, which one would you choose?
    Lets see...I guess it'd probably be Zangoose or Absol. There are not many pokemon that share a theme with my zan. :/



    Please check out my 4th & 5th gen trade thread posts.

  21. #1296
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    I'm glad the story is coming over well for you - thanks guys =] - Ok making post to link on first post

    [IMG]http://i47.*******.com/33xahi0.jpg[/IMG]

    + Chapter 1
    + Chapter 2
    + Chapter 3
    + Chapter 4


    Last edited by Northern Lights; 25th June 2010 at 5:54 PM.

  22. #1297
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    Since I'm too lazy to split them... Yeah. Bold in comments.

    Quote Originally Posted by MasterCharizard15 View Post
        Spoiler:- Chapter 1: Revenge and Rebirth, part 2:
    That last one made me lol.

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post


    EDIT; Ah, i remember now - yes, this is just a heavily edited re-write, the Kuchikukan would have had the same outcome as this story, it's just the means to which we arrive at that situation have changed

    Kuchikukan, Destroyer = Sakasama Tamashii, Inverted Soul [逆さま神]
    Ooooh. Yay =D
    I loved that one, even if it's only just 2 chapters~

    Quote Originally Posted by rotrum View Post
    Idea 2.

    Gonna be boring, but if the idea is more appealing then the first to you all, then it’ll get more exciting next.

    And no, I don't like having actual Story in my prologues
    Hmmmm.... So you're not continuing that last one?

    That's too bad. As I said, I effing hate dislike outright facts... Might try to digest this new one later.

    Quote Originally Posted by ~.:Northern Lights:.~ View Post
        Spoiler:- Chapter 2:

    Uhh, again, bold in comments.

    Quote Originally Posted by Da14u.C View Post
    Chapter 4 =)

    “Ravage Garou,” He mouthed the words, not wanting his command to be heard by others. His zanpaktou shorted and got heavier. A hungry growl could be heard in the background and claw marks appeared on the wall opposite. He absorbed some of the fire released by Kida.

    The next chapter, I need zanpaktou personality info from NL, Kusari and anyone else who has a fire based zanpaktou or one that has fire abilities.
    Oh. So Seijuro was Eon. I originally thought it was kusari.

    Emcee has a fire based zanpakto. So does Flash Step, but I haven't seen him for quite some pages now.

    I just noticed. You still refer to Golde as a woman. Why is that, I wonder? (From Chapter 3)

    And woo, I have a long title :P

    Quote Originally Posted by VizardBlue View Post
    I guarentee chapter 1 will be up by tommorow. hopefully[/s]im lieing[/s][/s]noseriously[/s][/s]probablyonfriday[/s]. yeeep. Tommorow.

    Tagfail

        Spoiler:- Chapter 2 NL:
    Because you're fighting over 2 CAPTAINS.

    I trust I don't need to bold, italicize and underline the word Captain?

    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpaktou spirit, which one would you choose?
    Mantine, cos it resembles Minazuki Hmmm... Something watery huh. I'd say Manaphy/Tentacruel. Gee. idk.

    Hurm.... I read like 3 chapters today. ^~^
    I feel like posting a one-shot.... Maybe soon.

    I think someone needs to inform Golde that he had kusari both on Squad 3 and 13.... on the front page. Hmmmm..
    Last edited by arceus03; 25th May 2010 at 12:38 PM.


  23. #1298
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    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpaktou spirit, which one would you choose?


    Absol or Ninetales - come on, both are based off ambiguous canine creatures of the spirit world, Absol = Barghest and Ninetales = Kitsune

    OH, guys, if it isn't too much trouble i need you guys to give me a description of what your inner worlds look like. I'll pick a few to use in coming up chapters, but i can't progress far until i have them =]

  24. #1299
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    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpaktou spirit, which one would you choose?

    Charizard.

    Firey Dragon...win.

    If not my favorite than, Salamence...

        Spoiler:- Chapter 1: Revenge and Rebirth: Part 3:
    Last edited by MasterCharizard15; 25th May 2010 at 4:09 PM.

  25. #1300
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    Sigh, are ya'll blind?
    The next chapter, I need zanpaktou personality info from NL, Kusari and anyone else who has a fire based zanpaktou or one that has fire abilities.


    And I know they are a lot of you who enter taht category. hinthintMC15hinthintNLhinthint


    and now Imma highlight my post in red.

    I get irked when I feel ignored.

    If you could have a pokemon as a zanpaktou spirit, which one would you choose?

    Jigglypuff ~ cute pawns all

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