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Thread: Ice Heart

  1. #1

    Default Ice Heart

    Ice Heart

    Welcome to Ice Heart, a new tale about a Glaceon named Spazz's journey for... something. You have to actually read the story to find this stuff out. I just figured everyone loves the eeveelutions, and they're unlike any other Pokemon family, so they deserve their own fanfic! Banner needed, any artists that would be willing to do it would be great. Character bios coming soon, and chapter directory, you know, as soon as I right actual chapters besides chapter one. By the way, I have serious motivation issues... so please comment, all critiques/comments drive me to write more!!

    Chapter 1
    Rated: G
    Reason: Nothing in here Pokemon doesn't have.

    I stood in the deathly silence of what they called the Acuity Lakefront. The snow was falling lightly, covering everything with a layer of white, like the powdered sugar on a human's treat. I don't think anyone has ever actually seen the grass surrounding Snowpoint City, even in the summertime it remained as frosty and cold as ever.

    I opened my eyes and looked around. The sky was gray-white and depressingly bleak. The pine trees surrounding the area were covered in snow and strung with multicolored lights and stringy garland, along with ornament bulbs. Christmas. Another pointless human celebration.

    In the distance, I could see two shapes vaguely, moving in circles around each other. No doubt another Pokemon battle. Something I had hated since.... no.

    I'm not even going to go there yet.

    I shook myself off, turning my mind back to what I needed to do. Jazz was coming, and I needed to check on something.

    Our parents must have been really tired when they named us. I mean, our names rhyme for goodness sake! But secretly, when I'm not around my brother, I like my name: Spazz. It just sounds good and rolls off your tongue nicely, right?

    I padded softly over to a mound of snow, and pawed at it gently, unearthing a pulsing green rock with grass growing all over it. Grass. What a strange, mysterious thing. I had never seen it in all my life. And the way it glowed... I knew it was somehow important.

    Softly, I brushed my tail over it to bury it once again and head off to my den. Upon turning around, I was greeted by a yellow, spiky face grinning at me. "Spazz. What a nice surprise. You don't look happy to see me. ...What was that?"

    "What was what?" I asked nervously. I didn't want Jazz to know about the green rock. All my life Jazz the Jolteon had been stealing my thunder, no pun intended, and for once I wanted one thing all to myself.

    "It was nothing, bro. Seriously, I'd tell you if I'd found something important." I started padding in the direction of Snowpoint while desperately trying to change the subject.

    "So, how's the battle training going?" If there was one thing Jazz was obsessed with, it was Pokemon battles. Every time I saw him, he was boasting about his lastest victory against a Machamp or the new battle move he just learned. I figured asking about his wins would keep his mind off the wins. But I was about to experience a different Jazz that I've never known.

    Jazz's face contorted till he was almost growling at me. "I know your secret, Spazz. You have the Moss Rock. We want it, now."

    I shook my head, not knowing what he was talking about. Could it be the green stone I had found buried in the snow the day I evolved into Glaceon?

    Then I remembered one of the first lessons our mother taught us - evolution. Eevee is the evolution Pokemon, and can evolve into many different forms.

    Touching a Thunder Stone makes them a Jolteon. Touching a Fire Stone makes them a Flareon. Touching a Water Stone makes them a Vaporeon. Happiness makes them an Espeon in the day, Umbreon at night. And finally, the Moss Rock makes them a Leafeon and the Ice Rock makes them a Glaceon.

    I had been training one day when I tripped over something buried in the snow. Unearthing it, I found a pulsing icy blue rock with a frosty tip. The aura emitted from it was cold. I should know, since I can sense auras. I touched it cautiously... and was out cold in a flash of bright light. Upon awakening, I felt different. I was different. I was a Glaceon. The Moss Rock is the rock that evolves Eevees into Leafeon.

    "Hand it over, Spazz. We need to harness the evolution of eevee so that our glorious family can triumph over all Pokemon."

    "...Okay, that's just stupid, Jazz. The eevee family is remarkable, but so are all Pokemon. All Pokemon are equal, except for Legendaries. That's the way it is," I said fiercely.

    Jazz didn't even bother replying - he let his skills do the work. His spiky fur crackled with electricity, and in one swift motion he shot a bolt of lightning at me. I may not be a battler, but I do have some skills. Quickly, I concentrated and a film-like substance covered my whole body with a silver-pink. I leapt at the Thunderbolt and it rolled off of me, zigzagging back towards Jazz. Jazz leapt aside gracefully, the electricity making the snow rise like a curtain.

    When it fell again, the snow was gone. So was the Moss and Ice rocks. And so was Jazz. If he gets his paws on the Thunder, Fire, and Water Stones, all Pokemon will be in big trouble, I thought. Evolution emits really powerful rays... who knows what they could do if they could harness that power?

    I gritted my teeth. I wasn't a fighter. That was true. But this was too big to back down from. I decided to get going right away for Sunyshore. Why? Because Sunyshore is where the ThunderStone is. I'm talking about a giant ThunderStone where all the little ones come from. That's the one they're after. I know it.

    Suddenly a small ball of brown fur came tumbling down the mountain and landed in a heap in front of me. Its two pointy ears poked out of its round head, and small black eyes gazed up at me, frightened. I recognized the Pokemon instantly, mostly because I used to be one. The Eevee shook itself off, scattering snow everywhere - not that I minded, being an ice type.

    "I heard everything," it said. Its voice was a little squeak - it must be a young little eevee. "Is it true that Jolteon's going to destroy all the Pokemon but the eevee and its evolutions?" I wasn't surprised such a tiny creature could go ten minutes without being noticed - what I was surprised was how the heck that eevee got up the cliff, and when. I hated to tell the eevee it was true and scare him even more, so I decided to get the eevee off my back all the while not scaring it. There was no place for a tiny little vulnerable eevee on my journey. I bent down and dropped my voice to the barest of whispers.

    "Don't worry, it's just a game. Don't tell anyone! My brother and I like to play a game. He's the pretend bad guy, and I'm the hero. Sometimes we even fight, but we don't hurt each other bad. So there's no reason to worry, little eevee." I could see the little eevee's eyes get brighter when I mentioned that it was a game.

    Uh-oh. I hope I didn't just say the wrong thing.

    Sure enough, within the space of ten seconds I had a little eevee jumping and prancing all around me asking if he could join in the game. I calmed down the eevee, and quickly invented a lie to keep the eevee out of danger. "The game is a tough one! Too tough for a little eevee. In fact, we have to keep moving or we lose. That's because the winner is the first one to make it to Sunyshore City, on the other side of Sinnoh! It's too dangerous for a little shrimp like you." I could see the eevee's lip trembling and eyes watering as I walked away.

    I looked back one more time, and the eevee was gone. Good, it probably realized it couldn't join in and went home. Now I could get back to my task at hand - beat a Jolteon to Sunyshore, protect the Thunder Stone. The Fire Stone and Water Stone didn't matter. I had seen them with Jolt already. Protecting the Thunder Stone was our only hope.

    Looming ahead of me was a giant rocky tunnel. Mt. Coronet! Had I walked that far already? I looked back. At my snow. My ice. My home. I'd see things I've never seen before. Pokemon I've never met before. But it would be worth it. I hoped.

    Now for the matter of getting into Mt. Coronet, as the entrance was fairly high and I wasn't a Leafeon. During my limited battle training, I got to choose between Strength and Rock Climb. Oh, why didn't I pick the former? That's it! Moves! I backed up a bit and formed a glowing ice-blue circle in my mouth. I shot zig-zagged beams all over the place, forming steps out of ice. I climbed the slippery steps one by one and made it to the top.

    I was about to go inside, when something fell on my face, yelling and shrieking. I was under attack!
    Last edited by Mayfan; 11th August 2010 at 5:16 PM.

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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Eon Isle, Caelia


    I enjoyed it, its very rare to see a Pokemon Pov, your is also very well exucuted, well done. Spazz is very unique and so is Jazz, who indeed is a pokemon psychopath. I hope to see more real soon.
    A fanfic set in a magical region far away from Nippon. where a boy faces a mass of Shadow Pokemon and typical travel!
    Check it out!

    I am a proud AmberDawnshipper, Pokeshipper, AmberMistshipper, Sunnyshipper, Sparksshipper...etc!

    PM me if your curious about what the hell are those shippings!

    Post this into your Sig. if you think the beast of Dartmoor is a Luxray!

  3. #3


    Yay, a review! Now I can write chapter two (seriously no rhyme intended)

    Chapter Two
    Rating: PG
    Reason: Blotted out minor swearing

    The attacker flailed all over my face. It sure was a small opponent - easier to beat. I let my tail do the talking. I focused all my energy into hardening my tail into a steely iron and smacked it across the attacker, sending them flying into the wall of the cave mouth. Hissing and spitting, I leapt into the cave and pawed the ground, ready for more combat. But to my surprise, my attacker was light brown in coloration and very fluffy. Wait... eevee? Eevee's ears and tail drooping and it looked at the ground in nervousness, sweeping its bushy tail back and forth.

    "Please don't be mad. It's just... your game looks fun! I want to help you. I know Rock Climb, and I can easily get to high things. I wouldn't be a problem at all. Really!" The eevee looked up at me. "Please, there's a bit of the moon shard in this mountain. At least let me come with you until them. I hate being a scaredy cat weakling, and if I evolve into Umbreon, my personality will grow up." I bit my lip. It was hard to resist the giant brown eyes staring hopefully at me.

    "Fine. Just know that I am not your babysitter and I am not responsible for any bodily harm that may come to you. Deal?" I bit my lip harder, knowing that I may have just doomed a fellow eevee to be chased by an evil Jolteon... and his friends - he said we, so there must be more. We had to get to the moon shard as quickly as possible, because eevee would be a lot tougher in battle and in personality as an Umbreon. The sound of Eevee's voice jolted me back to the present, declaring it a deal.

    "Great. We're on the same page, then. Do you have a name, little guy?" The eevee's eyes dropped back to his paws and his tail curled around him tightly.

    "My name... is... Sapphire," he said, sounding choked up. I could tell that name had some important meaning to him. "But you can call me Saffy. I know, it's a girly gem. I hate it. But it's my name." Saffy closed his eyes and looked away. "When we win this game, do you promise me you'll take me to Canalave City? That's where my family is. I... miss them so much. That's why I have to show them I'm capable of evolving into Umbreon."

    I felt Saffy's pain. I knew something happened between him and his family, but I barely knew him, so I wouldn't press for details. Just then a large screeching sound boomed through the cave, and the ugliest creature I had seen was before us. It had two stubby light blue legs and a gaping mouth. Two tiny purple ears rested on its fat head. "What the h*ll is that!?" I yelled.

    Saffy whimpered. "It's a Golbat! They're very mean!"

    I stepped up to protect Saffy from the Golbat. The familiar icy blue orb pulsed in my mouth momentarily, then I released it in an amazing burst of ice. It struck the Golbat down, and I grabbed Saffy by the scruff of his neck, running down a slope of the cave.

    We zipped right by of a bunch of Clefairy and Cleffa, past a pond with Tentacool and Buizel... there were a lot of cool things to see here if we weren't in such a goshdarned hurry! Finally I turned the corner and slowed, panting. "I... think... we lost em." I couldn't be sure. It was really foggy and hard to see anything. Saffy prodded me in the side and pointed down the nearest slope. I could see light filtering in from above and a shiny black rock illuminated.

    Without knowing, we had run ourselves right to the moon shard. I remembered what I had been taught: the moon shard. It was one of the most effective ways to evolve into Umbreon. It simulated nighttime, but stronger than actual night, so all you had to do was touch it and think happy thoughts and we'd be on our way to evolution. I bent down and whispered in Saffy's ear, "Go for it!"

    Saffy took a deep breath and slowly made his way down to the Moon Shard. Putting one paw up, he was about to touch it when suddenly, white needles soared through the air, striking him and making him cry out in pain. Who else would have done that but our good friend Jazz?

    I intervened, a purple pulse of darkness glowing in my mouth. I flung it at Jazz, hitting it with Iron Tail to make it go that much faster - it was now a glowing purple darkness orb with silver streaks. Jazz's fur crackled like it always did and soon a Thunderbolt attack was soaring towards my Shadow Ball. A huge explosion went off, throwing Saffy into me and Jazz into the wall. I got up with somewhat ease while Jazz peeled himself off the wall. I narrowed my eyes and spoke harshly. "You won't win, Jazz. Saffy, touch the stone." Saffy nodded and ever so slowly touched the Moon Shard, concentrating on the happiest thoughts. I knew it would take a while for the happiness to build up, so it was my job to stall Jazz.

    I readied another ice beam, drawing all my icy energy to the surface. I could tell Jazz was readying a Thunder the way his fur kept crackling insanely. Insane, just like him. Ha! I suddenly dropped the Ice Beam and readied Mirror Coat. I could see the shock and confusion on his face when I stopped charging and let the filmy substance creep over my body again, making me glow beautifully. He let loose the most powerful blast of electricity I've ever seen. I leapt in its path and sent it right back at him, causing the cave to rumble and collapse. I could see that Saffy was done evolving, and I yelled at the top of my lungs, "Mt. Coronet is having a landslide! A rockolanche! We need to get out of here, quick!"

    As we were running, Saffy looked at me with intelligence in his eyes and told me what I feared he'd find out. "It's not a game."
    Last edited by Mayfan; 17th August 2010 at 5:29 PM.

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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Eon Isle, Caelia


    Great chapter, just like I tell all others always go over the work. I love your details as well as Saffy, he seems very peculiar.
    "Mt. Coronet is having a landslide! A rockolanche! We need to get out of here, quick!"
    That cracked me up, I don't why but it did.

    Keep it up.
    A fanfic set in a magical region far away from Nippon. where a boy faces a mass of Shadow Pokemon and typical travel!
    Check it out!

    I am a proud AmberDawnshipper, Pokeshipper, AmberMistshipper, Sunnyshipper, Sparksshipper...etc!

    PM me if your curious about what the hell are those shippings!

    Post this into your Sig. if you think the beast of Dartmoor is a Luxray!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009


    'Allo allo there~ It has been indeed a long time since I reviewed a fic, so forgive me if I'm rusty~

    First thing I want you to ask yourself is that if you really have the motivation to write this. Sure, reviews and praises are great, but when you write a story you have to want to write it. You have to be sure that you can push through with it. If it is, the effort you put into it will show through your story, and people will be more than happy to read it :3

    You might have a pretty interesting plot, depending on how you write it out. From what I can tell, it's about a family Eevees attempting to take over the world with some evolution stones. But before I jump the gun on that and all, I'mma gonna talk about the story and all the nitty-gritty technical stuff.

        Spoiler:- Apologies if it's a bit long? I tl;dr too much ;3;:

    Soooo um, I hope that helps? D:? I tend to ramble on and on, but overall I think you might be able to make this work if you fix a few things here and there, and definitely make the story go a bit slower.

    PROGRESS: 0% (Currently Planning)
        Spoiler:- Need to kill some time?:

  6. #6


    Chapter Three
    Rating: PG
    Reason: Blotted out swearing

    "No, it's not a game," I said, slowing down and dropping my voice to barely a whisper. "It's... all real. We need to beat Jazz to Sunyshore City, or we lose more than some silly game." Saffy looked down, and I could see the worry in the young Umbreon's eyes. "We'll be fine," I told him soothingly.

    There was a large opening in the side of Mt. Coronet. Daylight so harsh I blinked in confusion poured in from the side, surrounded by a circle of boulders. Then I remembered the move I had decided to take on. "Watch this," I winked at Saffy and began to glow red, concentrating. I barged at the boulders, keeping low the the ground, and thrust my head up so that the boulder went flying, clearing the path for us to get through.

    "That was quite impressive," I heard a voice say. Coming in my direction was a sleek light purple Pokemon with whiskers and a ruby red jewel on her forehead. Her cat-like ears were standing upright and alert, and her long, narrow tail was split into two at the tip. It was an Espeon. She was moving towards me in large strides, with her head raised high and confidently. "I'm Myfia," she said, "Welcome to Celestic Town."

    Myfia moved over and I saw what she was talking about. The mountain curved down sharply into a deep, beautiful valley. Human houses sparkled and grass, something I had never seen before in my life but on the Moss Rock, sparkled with fresh morning dew. There were quite a few pristine lakes and pools, and people and Pokemon bustled in the morning fog. I was breathless at the amazing sight.

    Myfia smiled. "So, what do you think of my hometown?" she asked, looking over at me and Saffy.

    "It's beautiful," I said contently, and Saffy quickly agreed.

    Myfia giggled. "Come on, then, let's go! I have someone I want you to meet." Ever so gracefully, the Espeon slid down the rocks and into a warm puddle. I beckoned for Saffy to follow me and was about to follow suit when I thought - why not make this fun? I brought all my ice energy to my mouth and pushed it outwards in a jagged beam, freezing the hillside. I jumped onto my new ice slide and slid down, splashing into the warm water. Saffy took a deep breath and did the same, landing on top of me with a grunt.

    After clambering out of the water and shaking ourselves off, Myfia lead me to a cave in the center of Celestic Town. It had three drawings etched into the rock around it. I could recognize them instantly - Palkia, Dialga, and Giratina.

    Myfia hesitated before going in. "So why are you guys here, anyways?" I explained to her all that had happened thus far, and she closed her eyes. "You must talk to him, then. He can help you."

    "This way," Myfia beckoned with her tail, padding into the cave. "Father? I brought three visitors for you!"

    An Espeon turned around, growling, "Tell them to go the h*ll away!" Except it didn't look like an Espeon. Its fur was black and matted, laced with dried blood and battle scars. Instead of the usual red, the gem on its head was a dark purple.

    "Please, sir, hear us out," I pleaded. "Myfia brought us here because she thought you could help us with our mission."

    "I don't care about any of your stupid kiddie games," the Espeon growled, turning back around towards the stone wall.

    Saffy spoke up for the first time since we got out of the mountain. "Sir, please. This isn't a game. This could save all of Pokemon. There's a Jolteon who wants to harness the power of eevee's evolution and use it for evil purposes. We have to stop him, but we need your help. You're a psychic type. Use your Future Sight to help us, please."

    The Espeon closed his eyes. "I am Domek. I.. know what it feels like to want to be able to help, but not knowing if you can. I will use my psychic abilities to see what I can." He laid down on the cavern floor and reached into the future with his mind.

    Saffy, Myfia, and I waited in silence as the sun crept higher in the sky. Just as it begun to fall, Domek woke up and rasped his prophecy.

    Silver wings shall thou be grant,
    The voice of fate across the land,
    The universe, destroy or keep,
    The enemies again must meet,
    Thunder and ice, rain and snow,
    To the place where time won't flow.

    The air was filled with so much silence you could've heard a snowflake drop.

    "What... does it mean?" Saffy asked after a few minutes.

    "I know what some mean," I said stiffly. The enemies again must meet. That confirms that we haven't seen the last of Jazz. But inside I was puzzled. 'Silver wings shall thou be grant?' What the h*ll is that supposed to mean?

    "Since you're heading towards Sunyshore, I'm guessing Solaceon Town is your next stop," Myfia said. "I can accompany you to there. I'm afraid not any farther, however."

    "That would be great," said Saffy, blushing. I was guessing he would be looking forward to spending more time with Myfia.

    "You guys look wiped out," said Domek. "Why don't you rest a while here? It would be much easier for you guys to travel on full rest."

    None of us could turn down the offer. We all set up camp inside the cavern with Domek. We told him about Jazz and our journey and the like. He wished us luck, and it was off to bed for us.

    When I woke up, everyone else was still asleep. I got up, stretched, and padded softly outside of the cave. The sun was rising, dyeing the sky in a beautiful hue of pink and red. This was the dawn of a journey. My journey, with whatever friends I may make. Behind me, I heard stirring. Soon Saffy joined me, sitting by my side and watching the sunrise.

    It was true.

    Jazz, watch out. We're getting us to Sunyshore.


    ...That was exhausting. More later. Gonna go faint now. Baibai.
    Last edited by Mayfan; 18th August 2010 at 9:22 PM.

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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2010


    You seem to have completely forgotten about the landslide.

  8. #8


    Now for the start of a three-part arc: the journey to Solaceon!

    Chapter Four
    Rating: PG-13
    Reason: Swearing, minor blood

    After Domek had seen us off, we were on our way to Solaceon Town. Myfia turned towards me, the purple-pink whiskers on her head trembling. "There's fog ahead. My limited psychic powers can sense it," she said. I looked ahead, squinting, and sure enough I could see the faint wisps of gray-blue fog towards the horizon.

    "D*mn," I whispered. The last thing we needed was another obstacle in our path. Looks like the road to Solaceon wouldn't be that easy after all.

    Saffy squinted his eyes. "What kind of Pokemon is that!?" he asked, pointing ahead with his ears. It was a black bird with white on its breast. It stared at us from afar, then spread its wings and flew away. A cold wind swept through the air and I knew this would be important later.

    Myfia spun her split tail. "I can sense something! There is a mysterious presence here..." She closed her eyes and let the world wash over her, consuming her. "We must head down. Follow me."

    "Down where?" Saffy whispered to me. "What's she talking about?"

    Myfia's red jewel glowed blue and a beam shot out of it, striking the ground and revealing a small, rounded hole that was just big enough for a Pokemon our size to fit into.

    Without a word, I slipped down the hole headfirst. If this was what fate wanted, then so be it. I could feel Saffy and Myfia land behind me on the soft as clay soil.

    I padded forward, not a bit nervous. I could feel it in the air. Something was down here. Something was stirring. It wasn't dangerous. It was on my side.

    The hole lead on in a small, narrow tunnel that eventually opened up into a wide underground cavern. A green stone pulsed in the middle - but something was weird about this green stone. It looked like the branch of a tree, complete with leaves, and blue crystals stuck out of it.

    Suddenly the stone lit up like a star and the pulsing went haywire. Once it finally settled down, I heard snoring from behind me. Myfia and Saffy were sleeping soundly by the entrance. I poked them with my tail, but they didn't even stir.

    A pink beam shot out of the stone, and quickly took the shape of a Glaceon, just like me. "Hello, Spazz."

    I blinked. "What the h*ll? Who are you?"

    The Glaceon strode around me and, as if my magic, began to glow white and turned into a Jolteon. "You know me, Spazz. Every Pokemon knows me. But that isn't the point. I am here to tell you about your destiny."

    "I know my destiny," I told the creature. "It's to save the world."

    "Maybe," said the Jolteon, sitting down. There was another flash of light and then I was looking at an Umbreon. "Or is it? I thought my destiny was to live in a tree, playing jokes, but then I discovered my true destiny."

    "But this is serious," I said impatiently. "It isn't a joke like you supposedly used to play."

    The Umbreon winked and turned into an Espeon. "Come with me." And suddenly we weren't in the cavern anymore. We were floating outside of space and time. The Espeon waved her paw and an image flashed across my vision.


    "What are you trying to tell me?" I asked.

    "That everything is not as it seems. Spazz, you are not the hero."

    "You mean I'm not going to win?"

    "Now hold on, I simply mis-spoke. When it comes down to it, all will not be as expected."

    The Espeon raised its head, bringing us back to the cavern, and it glowed white. I stood in wonder, watching for what it would transform into this time.

    When I opened my eyes, a small, pink cat-like creature was floating in front of me. It smiled and turned into a pink beam, being absorbed by the rock once more.

    I had just been in the presence of Mew, the Legendary Pokemon.

    I heard a yawn and shuffling behind me. Upon turning, I saw Myfia and Saffy stretching and getting to their feet.

    "What... happened...?" Saffy asked groggily.

    "I'm not sure," I lied.

    What did Mew mean, everything is not as it seems? It seems pretty straightforward to me. I couldn't think about it now. My focus should be getting to Sunyshore.

    "Come on, guys. Let's get moving. We still have a long way to go, especially with that little Mew- I mean hole side quest." I flicked my tail upwards as a way of beckoning as I headed out of the cavern and up the slope back onto the route.

    When we got out, I had a surprise for me.

    The bird I had seen earlier, lying on the ground with blood smeared all over his wing.

    I rushed up to the little fellow and crouched beside him. "What happened, little guy?" I asked worriedly.

    The Starly opened his eye. "Big... scary... no time... attack..." He screeched and fell unconscious, his tongue lolling.

    I stood up. "Come on, guys! We need to get this poor little one help, and fast!"

    "No need," Myfia said smoothly, walking up to the Starly. She closed her eyes and focused her energy. A green aura seeped out of her and washed over the Pokemon. After a while, the bleeding cleared up and the Starly opened his eyes. "Thank you, miss!"

    "Who could have done this?" I asked, and got my answer with a roar behind me. I turned around slowly and swiftly to see a giant gray rock-like creature with bits of orange rock and a large drill on its giant face. Rhyperior! And it sure looked mad!


    Whoo, first chapter with non-eeveelutions with speaking roles! Two of them! Also first chapter with a Legendary, first PG-13 chapter, chapter with the most non-eeveelutions... this breaks a lot of records for the story Ice Heart, doesn't it?

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  9. #9


    Chapter Five up tomorrow everyone!

    Best Wishes Reviewer
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  10. #10


    Chapter Five
    Rating: PG
    Reason: Nothing in here Pokemon doesn't have.

    "Saffy! Get the Starly out of the way! I'll hold off the Ryhperior!" I yelled.

    Saffy jumped, grabbing Starly's wing and leaping out of the way just in time to miss a Hyper Beam.

    I closed my eyes and focused on an Icy Wind attack. The temperature in my mouth swiftly dropped to below zero, and I shot all the cold out in sparkling, glowing bursts of wind and frost. It buffeted the Rhyperior, but otherwise did almost nothing.

    The Rhyperior created a glowing yellow ball of energy in its mouth, and my eyes grew wide. It let the yellow energy out in a concentrated beam that surged at Saffy and the Starly. It scored a direct hit, causing a huge explosion.

    My eyes grew clouded with anger. I know I let out a roar and leapt at the Rhyperior, but after that.... I'm not quite sure.

    "What happened to Spazz?"

    "After the light, she fainted, I think."

    Light? What are they talking about? I struggled to come to, blinking my eyes. Everything was blurry, but I could faintly see black and purple. Saffy and Myfia.

    "I.... what happened, guys?" I asked, struggling to sit upwards and shaking off the blurriness.

    "I'm not sure exactly," said Myfia. "But you roared and leapt at the Rhyperior, and started glowing this weird shade of blue. The Rhyperior disappeared, and you fainted."

    "I... that's weird..." I managed to mutter before passing out again.

    I was back in the cavern where I had met the Mew.

    "This is the gift I have given you," said the Mew, in the shape of a Jolteon.

    "What, to glow and then faint while making things disappear?"

    "No. You have more power than any other Pokemon, bar the Legendaries themselves. You just don't know how to control it. Never let anger overtake you, Spazz. Remember what I told you..."

    I woke up, sweating and panting. Saffy and Myfia were peering at me nervously. "What's wrong, Spazz?" Saffy asked.

    "N-nothing. Forget that ever happened, okay? Let's just focus on getting to Solaceon." I picked myself off the ground and forced myself to march forward.

    Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Myfia and Saffy exchange nervous glances before eventually trotting after me.

    Don't worry. We'll be in Solaceon soon.

    But strangely enough, I don't think it was me who thought it...

    I'm not you, Spazz.

    I recognized it. Mew? Is that you?


    What the heck are you doing inside my head!?

    Guiding you through your powers.

    I grimaced, and Saffy looked at me. "Spazz? Is something wrong?

    "No, no, nothing's wrong," I said quickly, but I could see the worried expression on his face.

    "I think Spazz is going whacko," he whispered to Myfia, not knowing I could hear with my new sensitive hearing. Is that what I am? Whacko? Maybe I'm making this whole thing up, Mew and all.

    Mew's voice came to me sternly. "You are NOT whacko, Spazz. You are perfectly sane. I understand this is a bit traumatic, but..."

    I managed to tune Mew out by humming a soft little tune under my breath.

    The fog started getting deeper and deeper. Soon I could barely see in front of me. Myfia sighed. "So how do we get out of this one?"

    "Go left for a few feet, then turn right and head straight."

    I repeated the instructions Mew had given me to my friends, who looked at me like I was insane. "Um, just a wild guess," I said meekly. "Anyone got a better idea?"

    No one did, so we ended up following Mew's instructions and getting out of the fog.

    "That actually worked," said Saffy suspiciously.

    "Whattya know..." I said cautiously, trying to act like nothing had happened.

    "Yes," said a voice suddenly. "What do you know... Spazz!"
    Last edited by Mayfan; 31st August 2010 at 6:29 PM.

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