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Thread: "Don't Think, Just Do" A Pokemon Fanfic.

  1. #26
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    Okay so I read through and there were a couple of format errors, like you forgot to hit enter twice or something but nothing too major.

    I noticed that sometimes you use an where it should be a, if the word before the a has a consonant (like there) then you use an a and if the word starts with a vowel, you use an, I've noticed it a lot and I figure it's probably a typing habit more or less but I figured I'd point it out.

    Good chapter! We learn a lot about Mickey and Billy here, their very talented kids!
    Insert Cool FanFic Banner Here.
    Maybe I should start writing one of those...

    Honestly, the hell if I know...

  2. #27
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    My WHOLE life I've been trying to figure out how the heck the whole an/a rule goes!

    Wait... or is it a/an because I put "had" after it? ...0_o UGH!

    I just can't seem to get it right! T_T""" !!

    But thanks Legend and Chansey and all the others for your help! And yeah, now that I think about it, you actually DO seem to learn alot about them here...

    Hopefully I didn't make them too ...I dunno... too unbelievably good? Maybe that's the word for it...

    Credit to
    SWORN METALHEAD
    for the sig!

  3. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by bookauthor1123 View Post
    My WHOLE life I've been trying to figure out how the heck the whole an/a rule goes!

    Wait... or is it a/an because I put "had" after it? ...0_o UGH!

    I just can't seem to get it right! T_T""" !!

    But thanks Legend and Chansey and all the others for your help! And yeah, now that I think about it, you actually DO seem to learn alot about them here...

    Hopefully I didn't make them too ...I dunno... too unbelievably good? Maybe that's the word for it...
    No, no, they're believable, I just didn't know that they were that experienced all ready. I mean with proper training and care I'm sure someone could earn those badges and ribbons, I honestly thought they were blossoming trainers but it appears there is much more than just that!
    Last edited by Legend of Lucario; 16th June 2011 at 7:08 PM. Reason: I said I just a lot, and it bugged me...
    Insert Cool FanFic Banner Here.
    Maybe I should start writing one of those...

    Honestly, the hell if I know...

  4. #29
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    Okay , I'm going to attempt to revive this fic a little bit !

    I know I've been AWOL for a good while, but I'm going o re-read all my other Fic chapters and attempt to make the next Chapter to this ! Hopefully if I message you all I can get you to continue to read over and enjoy "Don't Think, Just Do" !

    Until then , I'm currently in : Read & Review Mode , ...

    Credit to
    SWORN METALHEAD
    for the sig!

  5. #30
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    Hey remember me? I bet hardly anyone does. I've been AWOL for forever. Don't feel left out.

    You'd be smart in reviving this; it was good. My fanfic came and went. I plan on posting it again, but for now, do not let me use this post for cheap advertisments.

    I hope your story will be as good in 5 chapters as it has been this entire time.

  6. #31
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    Default Chapter 7: The Funny Thing About Ol' Volkner (I'm Baaaacccckkkkk!!!!) ^__^

    Chapter Seven: The Funny Thing About Ol' Volkner...

    ... ... ...

    It may have been a brief moment in time sure...

    But there WAS a brief moment where I despised Contests and the like...

    ... ... ...

    Throughout my long years,

    there have only been three people who've ever made me see

    a sort of different perspective of it all...

    ... ... ...

    I wonder how Wallace is doing, by the way?...

    ... ... ...

    Mr. Fox didn't see the group off once everyone was ready to leave. As a matter of fact, after lunch, no one could even find Mr. Fox; and Mickey's suspicions rose up again. Its was 4:23 now, and the group that was interested in signing up for the Contest all filed in and filled the limousine with conversation and life.

    No one of any importance made their way to join everyone to the Contest Hall downtown. At least no one worth Billy or Mickey's recognition. Elesa and Flannery weren't planning on staying long. They were both there on business, and Elesa had to go back to her Gym in Unova once Mr. Fox told her... well... Whatever it was he had to say to her in private. Billy and Mickey weren't allowed to hear much of that part. As for Flannery, her band, Burning Slugma, had a rush performance back in her hometown in Hoenn.

    ...But I promise I'll make it to see you guys in the next one! Billy remembered as he and Mickey watched Flannery get picked up by helicopter outside the mansion walls. I wonder if she'll really make it? he thought with a soft sigh.

    Billy found his place next to Mickey, who didn't seem too focused on anything in reality to even acknowledge the fact that their clothes were still in the house.

    ...Along with someone's favorite red jacket... Billy thought sourly. Billy could feel the disgruntled grimace on his face, mostly aimed at Mickey's silence, and scrutinized himself for how he'd been acting just like Mickey would have...or should have.

    Speaking of Mickey, Billy slowly began to catch on to whatever it was that had his attention. Or so he thought.

    "I'm going too!" Volkner announced.

    "WHAT?" Mickey yelled in a fit.

    Mr. Fox looked slightly taken aback by Volkner's proclamation. "Really?" he asked. "Well, why all of a sudden you wanna take up Coordinatin'?"

    Volkner's sharp blue-eyed gaze met the darkness in Mickey's. Billy could almost feel the tension between the two as they both glared daggers into each others heads. Although, that really wouldn't amount to anything seeing as Billy's mind was almost literally wrapped around Elesa before she left.

    A cold grin stretched across the side of Volkner's face, just wide enough to avoid Mr. Fox seeing it, but just enough to taunt Mickey with. "I dunno..." he shrugged, obviously lying. "Just thought the crowd deserved some real talent
    in the ranks..."

    Mickey's brow furrowed in anger, but before he could get to yelling again, Fox spoke first.

    "Hahahaha! Splendid! Splendid! That'll be two Gym Leaders in appearance at the contest tomorrow night!"

    Two? Billy thought. "But, who's the first one if Volkner isn't-"

    "That would be me!" Juan said, a boastful demeanor to his facade as he'd cut Billy off.

    "Juan?" Mickey said dumbfounded. "Are you even allowed to bring two Gym Leader into a competition like that? Seems like an unfair disadvantage to everyone else..."

    Juan snickered under the brow of his pencil thin mustache. "Yes, it is... But however unfair, it's completely allowed in Sunnyshore."

    To this Mr. Fox nodded with an agreeing grunt, eyes closed in thought.

    Juan continued. "As the Mayor, Mr. Fox allowed guest appearances of certain Gym Leader and Elites...Dozens at a time on most days..."

    The boys gasped to this, to which Volkner rolled his eyes, mostly at Mickey though.

    "So... even Elite Four come to Sunnyshore City?" Billy asked.

    "Yes, more times than necessary really..." Juan replied. "That's why most people would agree that the Sunnyshore Festival Contest Hall ribbon is one of the hardest to acquire. It's quite a difficult task..."

    Suddenly, it became clear to the boys how severe a job Mr. Fox had given them. No matter how much faith he had in the two, Fox would actually put them up against Gym Leaders and Elites from all over the Pokemon world just for one competition? ...What happens if they fail?

    Volkner's devilish grin returned, along with the silvery glare in his sea blue eyes. "What's, wrong little Mickey?" he asked mockingly. "You seem a little...overwhelmed...?"

    Mickey immediately snapped out of whatever phase he was in and slashed his glare back at Volkner.

    "Overwhelmed? No, not in the slightest, mate!" he started to grow a little devilish grin of his own. "You're the one who should be a little worried. Seeing as I'm gonna take that ribbon...and your Gym Badge too once I mop the dirty floor with you in your Gym!"

    The two began to nudge foreheads with one another, lighting could almost be seen exchanging currents as the two forced each others momentum away. Juan wanted to interject; to tell them that they aren't the only two people in the competition tomorrow...to tell them that he was in the competition tomorrow as well...

    ...Sigh...

    ...this is why I so despise Contests...

    And that was the end of that. It seemed like there where at least 3 people that Mickey knew he needed to watch out for; Billy, Juan... and him...

    Bloody twit! he thought with a shark toothed grimace perched low on his face. His left hand covered the bottom half of his jaw though, taking away any satisfaction Volkner would have had from seeing him upset. I can't even focus on Fox with this 'blimey idiot glaring at me!

    Billy looked around at the other faces in the car, ignoring the only two that couldn't keep their eyes off each other for more than a minute. Collectively, it was around 12 people in the limousine. A fair amount of boys as the amount of girls. It was one-to-one by Billy's guess, although he made sure to double-check...and even triple-check at that, just to be safe.

    "Okay yea..." he whispered to himself as he began pointing at heads one last time. "Yeah, it's 12. Six boys. Six girls."

    In the vehicle, it Was Billy at the window seat furthest towards the other side, and Mickey sat on his left. Across from Mickey was Volkner, of course, and Juan sat in front of Billy on Volkner's left. Four other people, one other boy and three girls all sat on Billy's row, while the rest filled in the seats on Juan's row.

    Everyone soon began having their own private conversations, seeing as the end of the rows they were seated in were occupied by 'anti-social weirdos', as one girl described them.

    Oh come on! Billy lamented, his face plastered against the car window. This isn't how I wanted to meet my new co-workers!

    Juan merely let out a heavy sigh, and flipped the fringe of white hair that rested on his head. With a yawn he let his head rest on his knuckles, slowly beginning to drift off to sleep amidst the silence. Thinking Juan did this so that Billy would have to deal with Mickey should he and Volkner get into another screaming match, he followed suit and drifted off to sleep as well, his face still mushed and deformed against the window pane.

    Billy's gaze faded in and out as he tried to recollect where he was. When he finally 'came too' he was in a mysterious winter wonderland of snow. The likes of which he'd never seen before. Everything felt so real to him. The shivering cold, the warmth of his short breaths as he'd breathe and step into them. All so real...

    'Wow...' he said. 'Where am I?'

    Billy heard a hard sniffle behind him, then someone spoke up.

    'You're at Sinow, Billy!' a tiny voice from behind him said.

    'Who said that?' Billy yelled frantically.

    Suddenly, something pulled at his leg and he turned around in fright, trying to play it off by forming a random ninja pose and making Bruce Lee noises. The tiny person wasn't phased...

    'Who are you?' he asked dumbfounded by the voices small physique.

    'Wow, you sure do ask a lot of questions don't you?' the small body asked with a tilted head. 'I'm Cubchoo. I'm a Pokemon!'

    Billy's eyes widened more in fright as he bounced back. 'And you can talk!' he yelled.

    [Another question...] The Pokemon said as it shook it's head. 'Geez, calm down will ya'?' I know you've seen a talking Pokemon before haven't ya?'

    Billy raised his finger to his chin in thought. 'Well... only on television..' He looked down at the Pokemon, who looked back and snorted really hard to keep the mucus from falling out any further. '...But...I've never heard one talk to me in reality.'

    His body shivered a little as a small breeze blew past in the snow.

    Cubchoo's eyes turned up in astonishment. 'Really? You haven't heard us talk yet?... At all?"

    Billy shook his head as he let out another breath, the white puffs getting shorter and shorter from his quivering body.

    'Well...' Cubchoo said looking over his body and back at Billy. 'I can see how this'd be awkward for you now...'

    'Uhm...Well where am I? Is this still Sinnoh...like you said?'

    'Yes it is...Well, actually...' Cubchoo correcting himself. 'No...no it's not...'

    'It's not?' Billy looked around at all the snow and the thick mist overlayed around him. 'Then...what is this place?'

    'Hmm... never really thought about that... Guess it's whatever you want it to be...' Cubchoo responded.

    To this, Billy raised his finger to his mouth again, thinking about everything that was going on in his mind all at once. Cubchoo's face grew a tad bit complacent.

    'I can see this is a little...much for you right now...' the small bear said over another snorting gesture. 'How's about I show you?'

    Billy was slightly pushed to the side as Cubchoo walked behind him and rubbed his stubby hands together. The small puff for a tail that he had wiggled and tiny specks of ice trickled down in a soft, powdery motion. Billy just stared, skeptical of what was gonna happen next, but giving all of his attention nonetheless.

    Suddenly, as if out of nowhere, a gigantic polar bear-like creature started roaring madly in Billy's face; its icy cold breath chilling the tiny hairs on his complexion.

    Then , in the same instant, he was...awake?

    Huh? he thought, looking around with obscured vision. Where am I now?...

    "WAKE UP, YOU TWIT!" Mickey screamed from the top of his lungs, startling Billy.

    "Must you be so loud?" Volkner said with his hands covering his ears.

    "Quiet, you!" he quickly retorted. He turned back to Billy in the limousine as Volkner smugly scoffed and walked away. "And you, get up! We're here..."

    "Here?" Billy asked rubbing his baggy eyes. "Where's here?"

    "Geez, you ask a lot of questions!" Mickey yelled tugging him out of the car.

    Deja Vu ... Billy thought as he was pulled from the back of his collar into an unknown building. ...Why couldn't he remember why part of this seemed so familiar though?

    After a few more steps, Billy was forcefully dropped onto the ground with a hard thud.

    "Ow!" He yelled rubbing the soon-to-be knot on the back of his head. "What did you do that for?"

    "Now look what you've gone and did!" Mickey said in his dialect, ignoring the question. Exasperated, he threw his hands to his head at the scene before him.

    Billy dragged himself up and walked up next to him to see what he was looking at. "What?" he asked. "What'd I do?"

    Mickey glared at him with tired eyes. "You've gone and made us the last in line, that's what ya'did, you twit!"

    "You know, you can be nicer..." Billy said with a frown.

    "Nicer?" Mickey repeated, almost jokingly. He reached into his belt and unlatched a Pokeball, making Billy cringe as he took notice of which one it was. The Pokeball inflated as he spoke. "Why, you're lucky I don't call out Maestro to come and-"

    "Well, well, well..." called a voice from in front.

    The two turned to face Volkner, who was tauntingly tapping his foot on the floor in a mocking gesture. "Looks like you two have gotta file in at the end of the line..."

    Mickey was about to burst, but Billy spoke before him.

    "Wait" he said, raising his finger to his chin "You got here a while before us...so...why are you back here with us too?"

    The question caught Volkner off guard, causing him to loss his footing and drop hard onto the Contest Hall floor. He got up embarrassed, scratching the back of his head.

    "Uhm...well you see...-"

    "- You're in the back of the line too aren't you, Volkner boy?" Mickey said devilishly.

    Volkner's glare faltered and he was taken aback at the situation. Defeated, he simply tossed Mickey a dirty glare and turned around to walk off; but something stopped him cold, and he froze. Mickey and Billy watched as a figure walked past him, Volkner's eyes following them with every step they took. The boys exchanged a confused look, shrugging it off since neither could come up with anything to say that would accompany the situation. They just simply watched as Volkner's face turned into a constricted grimace, the victim of the look not even paying it any mind seeing as they'd merely walked past a few seconds before.

    The man had on a short-sleeved white dress shirt, over an outstretched black turtle neck and slightly faded khaki pants. He had on green sneakers, but that's not what caught Mickey by surprise. Underneath a black and white baseball cap and tied in a loose fiery ponytail that stopped just about his waist, was a full head of green flowing hair. It covered the base of his eyes and gave him an ominous look, at least for that brief moment under the room light that they had all say him.

    Billy was the one who'd pointed out all the weird jewelry the man wore. He had this weird symbol on a string that he wore around his neck, and what looked like a set of building blocks around his waist, held to it by a thick looking chain. The bracelets he wore made the most noise as he walked by, each arm with a different looking set of armbands than the other. He may have looked ominous and disheveled but, strangely, Billy seemed to get a good vibe from him. Was it because he knew this man from somewhere?

    ...Maybe there's not too much bad about this guy after all... Mickey thought with a small laugh to himself. If he can make Volkner act like thatthen he must not be all that bad!...

    "...N..." Volkner said through gritted teeth.

    "'N'?" Billy repeated nudging Mickey for some kind of explanation.

    "Don't ask me..." Mickey said trying to figure it out himself. Then, he suddenly got the devilish look into his eyes again. "...But it looks like someone has some information about him." He pointed over to Volkner, who was now freely moving, or at least breathing...which was a start.

    Volkner's pupils grew a little bigger in his eyes, and he returned to normal. Then, without turning back to Mickey and Billy, he finally spoke. "..His name... His name's Negative..."

    "Negative?" Mickey said.

    "Wow..." Billy laughed. "His name's that bad?" He and Mickey chucked together as they tried to determine what it actually was.

    "Maybe it's like a codeword for something?" Mickey suggested, humored by the concept, but mostly trying to get under Volkner's skin.

    "Oooh yeah!" Billy agreed with a heavy nod. "Maybe it's like 'Wiener McStinkyPants'!"

    "Haha! What? It's gotta be something worse than that! That name's just terrible!"

    "Hmm...yea you're right..." Billy thought again for a second. "How about-"

    "What? No!" Volkner yelled, turning around to face them again in annoyance. "N-E-G-A-T-I-V-E!" he spelled it out while gesturing the letters in front of them in thin air. "That guy's name is Negative!"

    Billy and Mickey stared at Volkner for a second, their eyes revealing nothing in particular, which threw Volkner off for a second.

    "Uhm...yea..." Billy finally said. "We got that part. Since you won't tell us what his name IS, we're trying to find out for ourselves..." He turned back to Mickey and kept making quieter suggestions to hide the crudeness of his guesses. Mickey replied to his suggestions with small snickers and sometimes a hard laugh that he'd have to muffle with the cuff of his hand.

    Finished with the two boys, he turned back around and walked up to the end of the line, scrambling his eyes around looking for the man along the way.

    Idiots... he thought before finally placing himself behind one of the Coordinators, waiting in the line that went on for almost a mile at best...

    Mickey watched him walk off from the corner of his eye, thinking that somehow, he might not know how yet, but somehow he'd just beaten Volkner at his own little "mind-game"...

    End of Chapter 7

    I'm pretty sure everyone can tell who the mysterious guy who's made even Volkner freeze up is, right? I had to put my favorite Gen5 character in this story somehow, and with what I've got in store for this story thus far, I think he's just the BEST pick for this plot twist! ^_^ , alright Comments are always welcome so please REVIEW ! TTYL

    And sorry for the whole AWOL thing ... You guys have NO IDEA what I've been going through to get this chapter typed... -__- But! Here it is and I hope you enjoy it!

    Credit to
    SWORN METALHEAD
    for the sig!

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