Chronicles of Unova (PG-15)

[Quackjack29]

^Good point NACHOE, did Red know about Plasma and got David a Ralts on purpose O.o?

[Glover]

YAY! I get mentioned in the Author's Notes! Whee! It's like getting your own Wanted Poster, but without the "Preferred Dead" part.

So, anyway. As you said, Paula hiccuping was just flipping awesome. I think you missed a good move opportunity there, one good hiccup with a mouthful of water and Paula can imitate water gun!

(On Move counts, I personally wasn't paying any attention to how many moves each person was using, if you pay attention to the anime, or look it up on Bulbapedia, you'll notice they stick to a regular 4 moves or so as well, probably because it's easier for the story-telling, so you're thinking is fine.)

We are dark, trans-dimensional assassins; the evil actors of an ancient deity. We do not need to explain ourselves to you.”

Typical baddie thing. "We are evil beings who do not need to explain ourselves to you. But we jsut explained it to you anyway."

Well done with the battle. Not too bad with Joltik, that battle scene felt short and flat comp[ared to others, but they don't leave you with a whole lot to write with, do they?

The swarm battle style was a fun take on the "randomly placed Grunts routine."

The music was for me, a bit off. One, I read too slwo and had to keep re-starting it, whereas the game loops it to a point where you don't notice, the other is that the story pacin g at soem point depends on the reader, and may or may not match up to the upbeat rythem of the music. Still, a preferred way to add sounds to the story, and I'd rather it this way in all audio uses.

(PS, I got around my video card issue by pulling up track titles on Google and playing the MP3 files.)

I'm back to liking where L/M are headed to, and I'm enjoying N.

Paula's evolution scene was very touching. I loved the meaning and the feelings, but it was another one of those "evolve to win the battle, not because of the battle" formulas, and we still need to break you of those for over-use. :P In all seriousless, the basis of that scene could have been done as a Kirlia, or as an evolution post-battle for variety. But that's the beuty of that scene, it's good whether Paula's a Kirlia, a Gardevoir, or something else entirely.

“Liepard, Fake Out!” the Plasma agent commanded. Liepard set its paw back down on the ground and glared at Paula menacingly. It slowly rose and started walking away, but then suddenly lunged towards Paula in a flash. The sudden movement startled Paula, but she was expecting it and utilized Liepard’s temporarily lowered guard to strike.

“Hey Paula!” David started to say in a loud voice. “Remember when N beat us in Accumula Town because you didn’t know any moves that could damage his Purrloin?” he asked. Paula nodded and grinned as she realized his plan. “You know what I think about Purrloin and Liepard?” he asked.

“What is that, master?” she asked back sheepishly.

“I think that- FOCUS BLAST!” he shouted in reply. Paula summoned the bundle of energy and launched it towards the overly-confident cat. The Fighting-type attack dealt absolutely crushing damage to her Dark-type opponent, soundly defeating it. David raised his fist in excitement, motioning towards N in the back of the room.

Let me see if I've got this right. Focus Blast is Paula's counter to Fake-Out? I think for imigery purposes, this bit is a bit backwards, or needs to be shoved into the middle of the Fake-Out description.

And really, what's a Fake-Out worth when you can hear the other trainer say it?

Great chapter... Must say though, Team Plasma is crazily evil in this fic. Not that it's a bad thing, but it's a giant leap from the games. It was more of a test here than there, David didn't even get to heal. It's a bit understandable why N only used Ferroseed though... having Paula sweep an entire team may have been too much.

Actually, in looking at ChaosBlizzard's and the canon bios for N, in this particular case, I think this is more right. How would it be fair to a Pokemon for N to come at them with 6 after a 1x1 gaunlet of 20? That's not a test, that's an ambush. And besides, N got the result out of it. I don't think he'd have pulled a second Pokemon anyway. In the game, you at least have the option to item-up between battles, which would make a full team battle more fair.

And I do have to exho Dr.Chaos' comments here too. And confess I'm guilty of the same thing.

[Quackjack29]

I got a feeling next chapter is gonna have something big.

[ChaosBlizzard]

Hey everyone, glad you all liked the last chapter so much. Just wanted to drop a quick update. First of all, the next chapter will hopefully be up around Sunday night, but I have a lot of work between now and Friday night, and I haven't started on the chapter except sketching an outline of events yet. If it isn't this weekend, then it probably won't be until next weekend unfortunately. I have linear algebra and C programming midterms next Thursday, and an assignment in my game class worth 15% of the grade, so next week will be busy. Hopefully everything will go well though and we'll get a chapter every weekend like normal; we'll just have to see how everything goes.

Second, as cool as it would have been if I had planned this, I did not choose to give David a Gardevoir because of Gardevoir's notorious devotion to their trainers. While that would work perfectly for the hero who opposes Team Plasma, that was completely an accident. I gave him a Ralts because Gardevoir are my favorite Pokemon. Let's just pretend I meant to do that though; makes me look smarter. On that note, <3 Nachoe.

And finally...

I got a feeling next chapter is gonna have something big.

The next chapter will introduce Cedric and Skyla, will cover the events of the Celestial Tower (Is that what it's called? The Litwick thing? I forget right now...) and will end with preparation for the Mistralton Gym Battle. Sorry to burst any bubbles, but this last chapter was the "big chapter." The next probable "big" chapter will probably be "Pranksters" or "Separation." If it isn't, "Dragonspiral Tower" will necessarily be, obviously... because it's Dragonspiral Tower... derp...

Thanks for reading, guys.

[Gegoory]

Why must I be beaten!

I wanted to mention your constant usage of "crushing damage." *sobs*

Being compared to Breezy and xXSaberXx is pretty impressive, seeing as they are the two most popular writers on SPPf.

Anywho... You seem to like describing Bianca and Gardevoir's... assets.
From what I recall, Gardevoir has no 'breasts' for the horn thing to stick out of. And you really fell in love with the Kirlia/Gardevoir+'seductive' combo.

Just saying.

Anyways, I think I'm too excited about the way you're going to describe Skyla and her half masticated flight suit.

Yes, masticated. It means to chew.



Hope you can get the chapter up sonner rather than later, but don't pressure yourself too much.

Seeya

[Glover]

Why must I be beaten!

I wanted to mention your constant usage of "crushing damage." *sobs*

Being compared to Breezy and xXSaberXx is pretty impressive, seeing as they are the two most popular writers on SPPf.

Anywho... You seem to like describing Bianca and Gardevoir's... assets.
From what I recall, Gardevoir has no 'breasts' for the horn thing to stick out of. And you really fell in love with the Kirlia/Gardevoir+'seductive' combo.

Just saying.

Anyways, I think I'm too excited about the way you're going to describe Skyla and her half masticated flight suit.

Yes, masticated. It means to chew.



Hope you can get the chapter up sonner rather than later, but don't pressure yourself too much.

Seeya

I was refraining from that comment, but... ^This.

[Quackjack29]

Why must I be beaten!

I wanted to mention your constant usage of "crushing damage." *sobs*

Being compared to Breezy and xXSaberXx is pretty impressive, seeing as they are the two most popular writers on SPPf.

Anywho... You seem to like describing Bianca and Gardevoir's... assets.
From what I recall, Gardevoir has no 'breasts' for the horn thing to stick out of. And you really fell in love with the Kirlia/Gardevoir+'seductive' combo.

Just saying.

Anyways, I think I'm too excited about the way you're going to describe Skyla and her half masticated flight suit.

Yes, masticated. It means to chew.



Hope you can get the chapter up sonner rather than later, but don't pressure yourself too much.

Seeya

I loled pretty hard there bro

[ChaosBlizzard]

Bianca is the main character's romantic interest; it would be strange if I didn't describe her as such. As for Paula, I mentioned the fact that she has breasts (as Gardevoir do, and always have), but I don't remember describing them in any kind of detail, unless... using the word "breast" is too descriptive, in which case... :\

PG-15 for a reason, kids...

[Gegoory]

Sqeeeeeeee! Minions! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHABANANAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Whoah...

I'm pretty sure Gardevoir has a flat chest, with the exception of the red horn thing.

[Glover]

Bianca is the main character's romantic interest; it would be strange if I didn't describe her as such. As for Paula, I mentioned the fact that she has breasts (as Gardevoir do, and always have), but I don't remember describing them in any kind of detail, unless... using the word "breast" is too descriptive, in which case... :\

PG-15 for a reason, kids...

Yes yes, ratings and all that, but some things you don't expect to see described on a Pokemon. And besides, in looking at the stock photos, there's nothing defined enough to call Garde's chest anything more than a chest, you know, thing with lungs, used to breathe?

And do we need to remind you how overboard you went with the Psychedlic Mushroom-like coma David was in? Cause we can. We're evil. Mwahaha.

[ChaosBlizzard]

Yes yes, ratings and all that, but some things you don't expect to see described on a Pokemon.

Sweet Jebus, avert'cher eyes, chillins!

And do we need to remind you how overboard you went with the Psychedlic Mushroom-like coma David was in? Cause we can. We're evil. Mwahaha.

You say that as if it's a threat. I still stand by what I wrote there; it was good. Why can't David and Paula have a close, personal relationship without it being sexual? Don't read between the lines. If stuff like that bothers you, I don't think you'll like where Part 2 goes.

Btw, the next chapter should be done this weekend with no problems.

[Quackjack29]

Why can't David and Paula have a close, personal relationship without it being sexual?

Who said it was sexual? Please quote me this said referance, cuz i don't remember someone saying that, just saying Gardevoir's are flat-chested

[ChaosBlizzard]

Who said it was sexual? Please quote me this said referance, cuz i don't remember someone saying that, just saying Gardevoir's are flat-chested

I assumed that was why you guys were taking issue with it. If not, my mistake.

That said, if your issue is with me identifying the fact that Paula has breasts, then let me clear something up.

breast
noun
1.
Anatomy, Zoology . (in bipeds) the outer, front part of the thorax, or the front part of the body from the neck to the abdomen; chest.

Diagram

As you can see, the horn lies on her "breast," specifically, in the middle. It was the proper word to describe where it is on her body. Now admittedly, looking at that picture again, they are more flat than I remember, but there clearly is still something there. Regardless of what that stock image depicts however, Paula the Gardevoir, being a female of the species, has something there; it was the proper way of describing it. My Pokemon, my story, my rules, to put it bluntly.

On a lighter note, I have something that I will be uploading with the next chapter as a special treat/surprise that will probably quell all these issues. Look for that along with Chapter 16 in the next few days.

[Dr.Chaos]

Are we really having an arguement about what breasts look like and what is classified as breasts? Come on people, grow up. The fic is rated PG-15 for a reason. Really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

[jstinftw!]

Are we really having an arguement about what breasts look like and what is classified as breasts? Come on people, grow up. The fic is rated PG-15 for a reason. Really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

I agree. I was tempted to comment earlier, but I figured it best to keep out. @__@

[Quackjack29]

Are we really having an arguement about what breasts look like and what is classified as breasts? Come on people, grow up. The fic is rated PG-15 for a reason. Really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

A'ight, was getting tired of this... strange argument to.

[ChaosBlizzard]

Are we really having an arguement about what breasts look like and what is classified as breasts?

Guys, we read and/or write Pokemon fan fiction for fun. Let's be honest; none of us have ever seen nor will see female breasts.

Come on people, grow up. The fic is rated PG-15 for a reason. Really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

Thanks, bro. Like I said before, I'll have a special surprise in with the next chapter. I'm going to do some more work on it tonight and it'll hopefully be up this weekend.

Thanks for reading everyone.

[Quackjack29]

Guys, we read and/or write Pokemon fan fiction for fun. Let's be honest; none of us have ever seen nor will see female breasts.



Thanks, bro. Like I said before, I'll have a special surprise in with the next chapter. I'm going to do some more work on it tonight and it'll hopefully be up this weekend.

Thanks for reading everyone.

Good luck, and have a good weekend

[Gegoory]

I think the resolution of this debate is straightforward and reasonable.

I was not complaining about sexuality. If I was, I would have mentioned David and Bianca's make-out session in front of Mistralton Cave. The second one.

I don't think most people realised that I was just trying to clear up CB's description of Paula, I was just confused. Or maybe not confused, rather...

What's a better word for confused that isn't as strong as confused?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hope the chap is up by tomorrow night, that would be awesome.

[Glover]

[QUOTE=Gegoory;13592958]

What's a better word for confused that isn't as strong as confused?

QUOTE]

Puzzled, confounded (might be too strong depending on useage, but who takes confounded seriously?), ah, alright, I'll shut up now from the Peanut Gallery...

Is it done yet? Is it done yet? Is it done yet?