Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.
Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
Doesn't seem to be as entertaining as the Gladys forum. (I missed the whole A.N.A.L. or whatever it was called, so I can't really compare that one)
Watch me tumble stuff:
good work, jb
soon we will bow to our new chocolate gods
What the hell is that board
other than apparently not terribly active
Last edited by The Admiral; 11th July 2013 at 7:51 AM.
I always put a cookie/chocolate/candy in my special safe that costed me 150$
So if a thief came in my house I was sure I had something to eat.
#001 VGC in the Netherlands
I love when stores give out free stuff.
yeah and then you get this thing and like it was free
stores always have free things. it's up to you to decide whether to pay for them or not.
I do not want to trust you.
When did we get so many 53 year olds?
maybe some people lie their age to make it look funny?
Thanks to FairyWitch for the profile pic!
† I am a Christian, and not ashamed to admit it! Copy and paste this if you are too.†
National Dex Completed 2/13/2014, at 12:12 A.M., with 212:16 Game Time, and thanks to my friends who traded me over 200 times that week
i only saw one in that pic
usually people hype them up as a means to be able to expand their value and hope to be able to live the tale of how they knew and saw them before they got big and famous and be able to sell their autographed memorabilia for a high price on eBay.
Or of course, just to defend themselves of probably possibly having bought a bad record they regret ever getting their hands on and defending their position as to why they make it out to be good and try to get people to do the same. I dunno, it's whatevs.
kinda hard to believe it's always been like that and beyond.
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