Rating: R (language & brief mention of death, mental illness & suicide)
Shipping material: Contestshipping
Summary: She's a free bird now, escaped from her cage, and about to fly high into the sky, to meet someone she loves dearly. Just another step, and she'll be together with him again. All it takes is just another leap.
Author's Note: R for character death, even though it isn't described too clearly. Don't read if you don't like May dying. The centered sentences are lyrics from two different songs. The opening contains a quote from Avril's song, Nobody's Home and in the middle of the story there is another quote from In Heaven by JYJ, but this is not a songfic. However, I recommend you to listen JYJ's In Heaven while reading this though. (I very recommend it) It's a korean song by JYJ, and I love them a lot. :P I was planning to insert the translated lyrics into the story, but I decided not to. I don't want this to be a songfic, but it's almost a songfic alright. LOL. :P
And yes, this is posted on my account in Fanfiction.net.
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, JYJ's, and Avril Lavigne's songs.
"She wants to go home, but nobody's home. That's where she lies, broken inside. With no place to go, no place to go, to dry her eyes, broken inside."
Her bandanna flies away from her grip. The coldness of the wind doesn't affect her a bit, though she is standing on the open railing on the highest floor of this building. The bright moonlight shines into her sapphire blue eyes, making them glow sparkly under the dark night sky. She keeps looking at the sky above whilst listening to the soft rustling sound the wind causes.
She doesn't even bother to look at where her bandanna lands. All she watches are the clouds and the sky.
The front side of her loose shirt sticks onto her petite body as the wind blew, creating outlines of her body. She has chosen the right place, the view of whole city can be seen from here. From the cozy houses, huge malls, tall skyscrapers, elite offices, brightly lit bars to the dimly painted banks.
The night breeze breathes softly against her face, tickling it gently. Her light brown hair feels coarse under her fingertips. It has been like this ever since he's gone. It's as if the hair withers along with her life.
She steps forward, hands holding out onto the sky as if to receive some kind of gift that's about to drop from the heaven. Yes, she's about to receive a gift, an eternal gift which will erase all her sadness, even all the memories and emotions she has ever felt.
She closes her eyes and smiles at the thought of what she's going to receive.
I'm going home.
That thought repeats in her mind as she retreats her hand and places them onto her heart.
I'm going home.
Now that she's declared not sick anymore, she doesn't have to be locked up in a small room with nothing to look at. She's a free bird now, escaped from her cage, and about to fly high into the sky, to meet someone she loves dearly.
He'd promised her to always be on her side, but now it's her turn to fulfil her promise. She made a promise to accompany him there, and she will never break her promise no matter what. She knew he will always be waiting for her, but she doesn't want to keep him waiting any longer. A year is enough.
She closes her eyes, savoring the taste of wind against her skin for the last time. She might not be able to do it again, so it's best if she enjoys everything she wants now. It has been a while since she last felt the wind.
"It has been a while." Her mind muses on the sentence mockingly. A while? A year, 12 months, 365 days without him, it's not just a while! Of course they would say it's not a long time because they aren't the one to experience it!
To be kept in a white room without any window for a year, to be eating the same thing for a year, to be seeing the same snotty nurse for a year, to be checked by a doctor every week for a year, that's not a definition of a life! She never wishes for a life like this. She doesn't want her life.
This is what she wants. This is what she has always wanted since this day a year ago. She has been strong for a year now, and it's too long for her. She has been enduring the emptiness, the loneliness in her life for a year now, and she believes he also has. She won't keep him waiting any longer now. This night, they will be together once again, and nothing can separate them anymore. Their friends, families and other obstructions are not there to stop her now.
She wants this. She wants him.
Drew Roselion, ever since he's gone from her life, she has seen him constantly. It's still clear in her memory when she first saw him, in his funeral. She was crying his name in agony and he was next to her in an instant, murmuring comforting words to her. She was, of course, shocked at first and couldn't believe it. That's why she asked him if he was Drew to see if it really was him and if he could hear or answer her. And he nodded, telling her not to cry as he'd always be on her side. She told them—all of the people who were present in his funeral—and he suddenly disappeared into nowhere. She told them he was just next to her, but then disappeared after she informed them about it.
But they wouldn't believe her.
The second time she saw him was when she was on her way to home after his funeral. He approached her and apologized. He also told her he missed her, and that brought her to tears. The third time she saw him, she'd already been admitted into a white room.
Her white hell.
They told her it was for her own good. For her it was a big nonsense. Right after seeing her beloved green-haired man for the third time, they immediately put her into that hell, what were they thinking? They might be locking her out to prevent her from more sorrowful thoughts, or more sightings of him. But it only made the matter worse, and they don't know. Or they don't care. Either way, it was as if nobody wanted her anymore, nobody loved her anymore.
Screw it all.
Right now she has to enjoy everything. No sadness, no sorrow, no hard feelings. It's too peaceful tonight to be feeling sad. She has to enjoy this last moment of her, before she will soon be reunited with him again. And when that happens, she can enjoy everything.
Everything is enjoyable with him by her side.
A serene smile graces her features as she looks down to the city beneath. The bright lights which illuminate the buildings below makes her see the crowd that's already forming. Some are maybe passerbys, some maybe are workers of the offices next to the building she's standing at. Which are which, she doesn't know. They are looking up at her, with various expressions on each faces. Older people seem to be worried, shocked, and concerned. The younger ones are either curious or just watching whether she dares to jump off.
Of course she dares.
She hears yells and screams. She hears those people shout at her to get off there. She hears shouts of people asking her not to jump. She hears some voices screaming at her to not be stupid. She hears some people lecturing about how sadness is a part of life and life goes on no matter what.
They don't know shit about life.
"I'm sorry but I'll leave now- following your footsteps
Following the road with no end- as I wander to find you."
She takes a step forward and scans her eyes around the people underneath. There's no sight of green hair anywhere. She chuckles to herself, there won't be any, however.
The peaceful wind of the night blows her hair again.
Her eyes are now gazing up to the night sky, wondering in which part of the sky is Drew at. But she knows, no matter where she is or where he is, they'll always find each other. Just like the past. They'll always find each other again.
"Drew," she whispers his name lovingly when she sees a faded silhouette of his face appearing on the sky, though it's evident that she's the only one who could see it. His facial features doesn't change even though he isn't living anymore, he still looks as handsome as ever. He smiles at her, the kind of smile that she loves. The smile that always warms her heart.
"We'll be together." She says fondly, face upwards looking at him. He smiles in response, and then disappears.
In your arms is where I belong, Drew.
She grits her teeth as she is once again disturbed by more people screaming below. It's becoming annoying to her, and she shots down an enraged look at them and yells loudly whilst pointing below, "Shut up! Shut up!"
The crowd does just that. Everyone silences for a while, partly curious of what she's going to do and afraid that she'll really jump off.
Smiling victoriously, she says to the people below, not caring whether they can hear it or not, "If you make any noise, I'll jump straight off."
Almost everyone who's watching draw a gasp and has his or her eyes widen when she steps forward. The underside of her toes is already visible to them, peeking through the floor she's standing on.
She's almost there.
Just another step, and she'll be together with him again. All it takes is just another leap.
There are some whispers, but she doesn't hear them. She yet again closes her eyes and smiles to the sky before taking another step towards the edge of the floor. She's dangerously close to falling and she doesn't care. If this means reuniting with him again, she would do it.
She's never been this determined before.
She draws a deep intake of air, she could already feel Drew's scent wafting in the air. The scent of red rose he had always given her when they were still together.
Her eyes glance down for maybe the last time, finally spotting them. Them. Those who used to be her friend. Now she's even disgusted of the word friend. There's nothing such as friends, just a bunch of backstabbers disguising themselves. Friends do not put their friend into an asylum! She screams in her head angrily. She sees next to them are her family. No, she has no family; they don't fit to be called her family. Family should object the idea of putting her into an asylum, but instead they accepted it. Family my ass.
No, no anger tonight. Tonight I have to be happy, I'm joining you, Drew. I'm keeping my promise.
Despite the obvious looks of concern and shock on her friends' and family's faces, she takes a small step forward. The female she used to call mother faints, and the male beside her—who she used to call father—holds her before she falls off. Oh, quit that ridiculous act, fuckers.
They don't give a shit about her anyway. If she's joining him, then they'd be more than happy to let her do so. Ah, why should she think about their thoughts about her joining Drew? They aren't the subject tonight, Drew is.
Filling her mind with happy thoughts, she gets extremely ready to jump. All it takes just this one leap, May, and you'll be united with him in no time.
"I'm going home, Drew." Her lips mutter with a sweet smile while her eyes close.
With her hands spread wide like wings, she lets herself fall loose on the air, ignoring all the screams and gasps below her. Ignoring all the cries of those people, whether she knows them or not. Ignoring the calls of her name from her family. Ignoring the despondent yells of her friends.
It feels light to be in mid-air, it feels so peaceful.
Like an angel.
All the time her mind is thinking about him, the only man she has ever loved. Finally they can be together without any obstacles. Her lips quirked into a fond smile before murmuring. "I'm home."
She has no regrets.
The last thing she knows is she sees him smiling with white glow illuminating his form gracefully, and his pure white wings spread along with his arms, reaching out for her.