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Thread: Rude Awakening (Pokemon X Fire Emblem; FF Quarterly 4 CHALLENGE ACCEPTED)

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    Default Rude Awakening (Pokemon X Fire Emblem; FF Quarterly 4 CHALLENGE ACCEPTED)


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    IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING!

    But anyway... After many delays, here's my attempt at belatedly answering the Quarterly 4 Challenge by crossing over two Nintendo franchises I'm fond of, Pokemon and Fire Emblem. It has some silly tie-ins to other stories I've done for both fandoms, some obvious and some less so, but on the Fire Emblem end it involves a particular game in the series I've toyed around with writing-wise a lot and have had a lot of fun working with the characters, and on the Pokemon end it involves three Yangverse characters I've wanted to expand on for a while, and one I wanted to give a test run. It also inadvertently wound up being the Yangverse's first chapterfic ahead of the still-in-progress Heroes After All due to sheer estimated length.

    But regardless, the resulting character collision occurs as such:

    Rude Awakening



    Chapter 1: Off The Clock

    You'd expect picking a vacation spot would be easier for the goddess of space, Palkia thought.

    Unfortunately, it wasn't, for the vacation spots were ones a bit out of her comfort zone in that regard: Alternate universes, ones mostly heavily displaced from the ones she sometimes casually visited.

    It didn't help the guide to said multiverse she was reading had various terrible jokes and memes scrawled in it by a certain brother of hers.

    She groaned and looked up to gaze around said brother's home dimension, looking among the black and purple haze and the chunks of off-looking earth with off-looking plant life until she spotted Giratina in his Origin forme, idly hovering and levitating a Nintendo 3DS he was playing before him.

    Knowing her space-bending powers would probably be affected by the nature of the place, Palkia spread her wings and summoned a jet of water to propel her to a chunk of the off-looking earth near where her brother was idly floating to wave the book at him, scowling.

    "Hey! Giratina! You agreed to help here!"

    Giratina turned his attention away from the video game to address his sister. "Ooh, right, the vacation! What's it for again?"

    Palkia sighed and shook her head. "We're trying to cheer Dialga up!"

    "Isn't bro too stuffy and busy for a vaycay most of the time?"

    Palkia paused, then looked away. "It... Hasn't been that long since... What happened with Cyrus. I see him more than you do. As much as he tries to hide it he's still really upset over it."

    She turned back to him with a still-despondent look."And... Well, we both already owe you, that kid, and Cynthia big time for stopping him... But you know the multiverse better than I do, so I wanted you to help me pick a fun spot. So we could both cheer him up."

    Giratina paused, then nodded somberly himself. "Good point... We could all try to find a place to chill after that..."

    He then promptly turned back to his game. "Just let me get to a spot where I can save..."

    "Alright, then-"

    She took a closer look at the game he's playing and scowled. "Hey, wait a minute!"

    She snatched the game and system from him. "That's my copy of the latest-"

    She paused, stared at the game for a few seconds, then snapped two of her claws together and grinned. "That's it! We give Dialga one hell of a theme vacation!"

    Giratina stared at her in confusion. "Why would we want to take him video game shopping?"

    Palkia smirked. "A bit deeper than that, dear brother."

    She gestured to the eldritch space around them. "Your little... abode ties into all sorts of other worlds! Now, not even we know exactly how many are out there, but likely millions, trillions, quite possibly an infinite number of 'em! And if there are that many, well, some might just very well be kinda familiar..."

    She points to the 3DS's screens. "...But that's more your department. Can you find out if there's a universe anything like the thirteenth and newest installment of my favorite strategy game series?"

    Giratina blinked and stared a good while before responding. "Um... Lemmie try something."

    He soared off further into his realm until he was a speck in the distance, leaving Palkia to stand impatiently and cross her arms to stare after him a while.

    Eventually, Giratina returned levitating a small rectangular device in front of him, using the points of the tentacle-like structures on his back to tap it carefully. Palkia eyed the device quizzically.

    "Is that… A Sliphpad?"

    "Yup! State of the art. Use it for keeping track of all the really out there universes as well as the closer-to-home ones."

    Palkia glanced at the book she was holding then at Giratina irritably.

    "Why'd you give me the musty guide with all your doodles in it then?"

    "Hey, don't diss my modern art."

    Palkia flung the book at Giratina's head. He didn't notice as it bounced off of one of his facial plates, but he did notice something on the screen he quickly tapped a tentacle to and levitated toward Palkia for her to look at. "Is this it, sis?"

    Palkia grumbled as she took the Sliphpad, expecting Giratina to have found a world closer to Dragonite Quest or Last Legend or, if she was lucky, a previous game in the same series as the one she wanted, only for her own eyes to light up upon seeing she was wrong. "This… This is it! It's pretty much it! I can't believe I'm saying this, Giratina, but you're a genius! Thank you so much!"

    She embraced her more serpentine brother, who reciprocated with his three sets of tentacles. After the hug was broken, she bounced up and down excitedly on her large feet, her claws clenched and her long tail thumping the ground in excitement. "This is gonna be great! We're gonna take Dialga on vacation there and all have a blast, and he's gonna be so much happier and we just need to think up some good disguises and get access to -"

    She froze in place mid-sentence, then scowled, tapping her foot. "Great. I just realized there's one particular obstacle to getting the resources."

    Giratina gave her a puzzled look. "...Um, we're Legendaries? We can just get 'em however?"

    Palkia sighed and put a claw to her forehead. "...Problem is that "however" involves one particular other Legendary."

    ----------------

    "So... let me get this straight, space babe."

    Palkia's eye twitched at that particular moniker from the small, grey-and-pink creature with gold hoops before her and Giratina within a quiet forest grove, but allowed him to continue.

    "You want to take your bro on vacation to a fancy swords 'n sorcery universe to cheer him up after that Cyrus guy tried to push the reset button on the universe, and honestly, I don't blame ya!" said Hoopa. "Some ******* trying to do that has gotta rub you guys the wrong way."

    He then raised an eyebrow. "That said, why do top-tier deity Legendaries like you guys need into... The Stash?"

    Palkia sighed. "Hoopa. Everymon knows you are the ultimate hoarder. Your pocket dimensions are filled to the brim with the sorts of things we need for this fantasyland vacation we can have easy access to anytime, so we're gonna need you to tag along."

    "Plus, if I screw with your pocket dimensions enough I can let us get to the wifi and stuff back home!" said Giratina. "Can't forget the essentials."

    "...What he said too," said Palkia.

    Hoopa tapped one of his mitt-like hands to his chin in thought for a bit before looking to the other two Legendaries and nodding. "...Alright then. You guys are the bosses. Plus, If you wanna cheer your bro up that bad that's a hell of a nice thing to do. I guess I can let you in on The Stash for this little trip of yours."

    He then smirked a bit. "...On three conditions."

    Palkia scowled. "Figured. What do you want, you greedy little djinn?"

    Hoopa's smirk grew wider. "First, all use of the Stash is under my supervision."

    "Okay, that's fair enough. Next?"

    "Second, I actually want in on this vacation, not just to be some sort of luggage carrier. And if it helps on your end I'll at least try to help cheer your brother up."

    "Also fair enough, what's the thi-"

    Hoopa made a gesturing motion with one of his hands as his smirk morphed into an outright mischievous grin.

    "...Bottle."

    Palkia's scowl likewise grew more intense. "You know full we-"

    "Deal's a deal."

    "Just roll with the dude, sis," said Giratina.

    "...Fine," said Palkia, "but keep an eye on him."

    A rift in space opened, which she quickly dashed through.

    ------------

    In a Hoenn Pokemart winding down for the evening, a lone employee stood idly lost in thought as he waited for his manager to bring his paycheck, only to hear a voice in front of him.

    "Yo!"

    He blinked and turned to see a young, pink-haired, red-eyed woman in pink and white clothing - he noted her t-shirt had characters from the TV show Valiant Knight Skarmory on it - giving him a doe-eyed look that to the worker seemed a tad too innocent.

    "Hi there! Let me guess, you were working the night shift one night some time ago?'

    "Erm, yea-"

    "And this crazy old man came in and robbed the place?"

    "...Y-yeah?"

    "And then he gave you this bottle and made all these oh-so-creepy mutterings about this Hoopa Pokemon whose power would be unsealed for three days if you opened it but when you did nothing happened and it was all like, to use the phrasing of one of my brothers, two spoopy four you?"

    "H-how-"

    "And you've just been oh so dearly hoping you can find some passerby you can feasibly pawn it off to so you don't have to deal with it anymore?"

    "U-um..."

    The woman extended a hand. "Gimmie."

    The man quickly pulled out a strange purple-grey-and-gold bottle and plopped it into her palm.

    "Thank you sir, have a nice day!"

    A rift in space opened next to her, which she darted through just before it closed and vanished.

    The man simply stared blankly a good while after.

    "...I need a raise."

    ----------------

    Palkia quickly emerged back in the grove where her brother and Hoopa were, her more natural form and scowl quickly returning. "Found it."

    Giratina blinked. "How'd you find it so fa-"

    "The 'pay a guy to act like a creepy hobo and pawn it to some nobody' trick is losing its luster, Giratina."

    Giratina fell silent as Palkia grumbled and popped open the bottle. Immediately a sparking haze of black energy emerged and swirled around Hoopa, and he laughed maniacally as he grew and grew until the haze dispersed to reveal a towering, six-armed, monstrous version of himself.

    "Yes! My true power! And I know just what i'm going to do with it first!"

    He created six portals from his hoops and reached through them with all six arms to pull out countless boxes of donuts of various brands.

    "Hey!" Said Palkia. "You're supposed to help us with-"

    "Aye, space babe, hold up! Getting my true form back works up an appetite!"

    He promptly used all six arms to shovel the donuts into his toothy maw and toss the boxes away, let out a resounding belch, then turned back to the two dragons before him. "Alright, appetite sated, I'm ready. What are we gonna need from The Stash for this little renaissance affair?"

    Palkia's expression became more passive as she put a claw to her chin.

    "Hmmm..."

    --------------

    In a dimension dominated by an omnipresent blue haze and teal, diamond-like, crystals of various sizes floating through it, Dialga was peaceably reading a book - a long one, he needed it to keep his mind on it for long. He flipped to one page, blinked at something scrawled in the corner, and groaned. "Giratina, must you leave your mortal innuendoes and cultural crude jokes everywhere?"

    It was right then he heard a voice from behind him."Bigger question, bro, you ready for us to rock your world?"

    Dialga stiffened with an annoyed expression and turned around. "Please tell me you weren't stupid enough to replicate a certain-"

    He blinked to find not only Giratina, but Palkia and Unbound Hoopa standing together before him, standing under a banner that said "VACATION TIME!" With a strange teardrop-shaped sigil Dialga didn't recognise below it.

    "...Alright, what are you three up to?"

    "We're up to cheering you up by going on a multiversal vacation!" Said Palkia.

    "Sis got a crazy idea for the theme," said Giratina.

    "And it only took just under three days for us to get most of the stuff read-" said Hoopa.

    Suddenly a mass of black energy dispersed from him and entered someplace on Palkia's person, reverting him to the form of a small, poltergeist-like creature.

    "...Scratch that, exactly three days," said the now-Confined Hoopa.

    He made another beckoning gesture to Palkia, who wagged a claw back in a scolding fashion.

    "Ah ah. You're gonna need to be small and innocuous-looking for part of this."

    "And what exactly are the fine details of "this"?" said Dialga, scanning the other three skeptically.

    "Well," said Palkia, "You - and really, all of us - could use a load off after... the Cyrus incident..."

    Everyone grew silent. Dialga stiffened a bit but allowed Palkia to continue.

    "...But me and the others found a good way to do so!" Said Palkia. "Go on a theme vacation to an out-of-the-way universe and have fun incognito with the locals to let off steam better than Volcanion does!"

    "Erm," whispered Hoopa, "Knowing Volcanion personally, if you take what you just said metaphorically it totally works,but more literally not so much since she can get kinda-"

    "I know, stick to the script!" Palkia whispered back.

    Dialga just stared awkwardly until hesitantly continuing.

    "...Go on?"

    "Well," said Palkia, "Giratina and I found a universe just like the thirteenth, newest game in my favorite strategy game series! And Hoopa here's gonna join the ride and let us all have access to local niceties while we're at it!"

    *"We'll go incognito, chill with the locals, relax, have a good time," said Giratina. "It'll be perfect!"

    "And I've got all we need to keep access to conveniences back home!" said Hoopa. "It's a win-win situation!"

    Dialga looked at them all, conflicted, before sighing.

    "All of you, I appreciate the effort and" - he paused - "concern. But this sounds rather risky, especially given things have gotten iffy via Palkia getting me too deeply into her interests in a less literal fashion. Remember when you tried to get me to read that Home-whatsit comic, sister? I had to drown my sorrows in Giratina's alcohol over all the convoluted meddling with time in its narrative!"

    Palkia frowned and raised a claw. "Okay, that was an exceptional case, yet I get why you're wary. But me and Giratina found a spacetime coordinate in this universe that'll be totally fine."

    "How?" said Dialga. "Doesn't that strategy game involve war? We can't barge in on another universe and commit wanton murder on the locals!"

    "That sweet spot Palkia mentioned is an era of peace, bro, just long enough for a good cooldown," said Giratina.

    "...Era of peace?" said Dialga.

    He turned his head away and thought a bit before turning back and nodding.

    "...That does, in fact, sound nice."

    He frowned again. "But abandoning our posts here might cause complications, especially so soon after a disruption..."

    "Well first," said Palkia; "we're not Legendaries from some human fantasy novel that go poof if no one is around to clap their hands and believe, You know we're made of tougher metaphysical stuff than that. We can leave and come right back in a spacetime sense just fine. And just to make sure, Hoopa can help us keep an eye on things back home."

    Dialga paused, then lowered his head and closed his eyes a bit before looking up and smiling.

    "...Very well. This vacation could be just what we all need."

    Palkia pumped her claws. "Yes! Thank you, Dialga, you're going to love this! We're going to love this!"

    "Alrighty then!" said Hoopa. "Now the multiversal getaway is a thing, we gotta get the disguises ready!"

    Dialga eyed him oddly. "Disguises?"

    Hoopa grinned. "Newsflash, Timeasaur! Me and your sis teamed up on the filthy cosplaying and LARPing bit!'

    ----------

    The four Legendaries, all but Hoopa having assumed human forms, were gathered around four of the latter's pocket dimension hoops, all going over a book together with Palkia.

    "OK, to start I think I'll demonstrate what we're going for..." said Palkia.

    She hopped into the hoop-portal and emerged a few minutes later wearing a distinctly flamboyant dress-like outfit themed around her more natural dragon form, complete with a long staff that had the Lustrous Orb embedded atop it. "Ta-da!"

    Dialga raised an eyebrow. "I thought this was a universe stuck in the medieval period, not one of your human magical girl shows."

    Palkia huffed and waved her staff at Dialga. "Not so fast. I'm a Valkrye, I've got a balance of healing and offense magic. Granted, latter for self-defense, but still."

    Dialga tilted his head. "So this is one of those character class things?"

    Palkia smirked. "Exactly."

    "Ooh!" said Giratina, balling his fists excitedly, "What do I get to be?"

    Palkia grinned. "Found a perfect one for you, Giratina..."

    She flipped the book to a new page and presented it to him. "Dark Knight!"

    "Ooh!" he said again, his red eyes giving a rather off-looking sparkle, "Is this like that one Gligarman movie?"

    He struck a dramatic pose. "You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the vil-"

    Palkia quickly frowned. "Not quite right either, you've got a lot of both physical and magical power and can still take a hit."

    Giratina blinked. "Oh, that's cool too! Lemmie get mine on..."

    He ducked into his own portal and emerged in plate armor themed around his own natural form, complemented with a sword adorned with a Griseous Orb on its hilt. "Ready to kick ***!"

    <OK, wait, if you guys are all putting on human suits for the locals, how do I get in on that?> said Hoopa.

    Palkia raised an eyebrow. "You likely have something in that "stash" of yours... "

    Hoopa placed a mitt-like hand to his chin and thought a bit before his eyes widened. <Wait! There's that one armband doohickey, hold on!>

    He jumped into his hoop portal and emerged shortly after as a scrawny, bronze-skinned youth, more teenager-ish in looks than his fellows, with pink hair tied back in a ponytail. "Geez, I dunno how you guys are so used to the whole funny looking monkey gig, such weird spindly legs..."

    He shuddered, then turned to Palkia. "But I'll live with it for this. Speaking of which, what do I go as for this whole LARPing session?"

    Palkia smirked and turned the pages of the book to a page she held up for Hoopa to see. "Trickster."

    Hoopa looked and grinned. "That's my style."

    He lept through his portal again and emerged wearing clothes themed around his confined form that seemed a paradoxical combination of jestery and roguelike. "Ready to role!"

    He turned to Dialga. "Your turn, vacation boy."

    Dialga put a hand to his chin and thought, then turned to Palkia. "May I see the book?"

    Palkia handed it over, with Dialga immediately flipping through it until he came upon a particular page and grinned.

    "Perfect! This "Manakete" class suits me nicely."

    Palkia raised an eyebrow. "The dragon one?"

    "Yes! It'll let me assume my natural form while still blending in!"

    Palkia scowled. "Hey! You may be vacation boy, but no cheating!"

    She smiled and flipped to another page in the book. "How about a Taguel? Turns you into a critter other than a dragon, good for variety, huh?"

    Dialga looked a bit before nodding. "Acceptable."

    "Great! Can I have your Adamant Orb?"

    Dialga hesitantly handed it over before Palkia and Hoopa whispered to each other, she dived into his hoop, and emerged with the Adamant Orb emitting a strange glow. "Here you go!"

    Dialga warily took the orb back and gasped and shuddered a bit as his human ears grew much longer and floppier in shape and excess blue hair sprouted in several places on his body. "What just-"

    "I tweaked it a bit to let it serve as your Beaststone. It'll let you shift between what you are now and your more beastial form. Though for this form you should get that armor you saw in the book on."

    Dialga blinked, but hopped into his own hoop anyway, and hopped out in armor that was, like his fellows, themed around his more natural form, but in his case form-fitted around his upper arms, lower legs, waist, and chest with no noticeable weapon. "I... believe I am ready."

    "OK!" said Palkia. "I think our usual human monikers will work here."

    "Valentina for you, Howard for Giratina, and Quentin for Dialga, right?" said Hoopa.

    Palkia smiled. "Yep."

    Hoopa smiled back. "Call me Bartimaeus then."

    "Fine by me. Everything we need packed in The Stash already?"

    Hoopa nodded. "Yep."

    Palkia turned to Giratina and grinned.

    "Gratina? Rev up that portal."

    Giratina grinned back to spread his hands in front of him and summon a large, distorted portal with a bright light emerging from within.

    "So we're going?"

    "Ayep!" said Hoopa.

    "You bet," said Palkia. "But Giratina?"

    "Yeah sis?"

    "No flirting with the locals."

    Giratina raised a finger to object before Palkia cut him off.

    "Of any gender or species."

    Giratina grumbled, and crossed his arms as he followed the others into the portal.

    ***

    And there's our kickoff! I've technically already got Chapter 2 queued up (I actually wrote a big chunk of both the first and second chapter in a notebook while I was away from anything with Internet access for a couple weeks a few months ago, and just need to transcribe second as I did first here) so expect it soon enough! For now,feel free to tell me what you think so far.
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 21st July 2016 at 4:12 AM.

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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    Well, this seems like it'll be an interesting tale. I haven't really played any Fire Emblem games or watched any Let's Plays of them, but I suppose I do have some knowledge from what I've read on TVT and such... Should I look up an LP of the game or something in order to better understand the setting?

    Anyways, the interactions between the legendaries were fun, and I particularly liked the Pokémart scene. Found that part very amusing.

    So, yeah. The set-up seems good, and I'm curious about what will happen next.
    Formerly known as EeveeandKirliafan.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DarkerShining View Post
    Well, this seems like it'll be an interesting tale. I haven't really played any Fire Emblem games or watched any Let's Plays of them, but I suppose I do have some knowledge from what I've read on TVT and such... Should I look up an LP of the game or something in order to better understand the setting?
    First off, thank you so much for reading! And short answer is, if you want! The setting will gradually be explained as part of the story's progression to make this fic more accessible to non-Fire Emblem fans, so it hopefully wouldn't require much extra research to enjoy! That said, if you or anyone else wants some extra familiarity on what it's going into and are willing to watch someone else play the game to get it, an LP's a viable option! I recommend this LP, though you can search around for another; I do recommend skimming over battle-heavy segments with no character dialogue and the very-late-game side stories if you want to get more of what'll actually be important to this fic regardless.

    Anyways, the interactions between the legendaries were fun, and I particularly liked the Pokémart scene. Found that part very amusing.
    Haha, thanks. I knew I had to address the in-game Hoopa event somehow, and that felt like a fun way to do it.

    So, yeah. The set-up seems good, and I'm curious about what will happen next.
    Again, it hopefully won't be too long until you find out!
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 23rd July 2016 at 12:45 AM.

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    Aaaand here's Chapter 2! This is where we start getting into the Fire Emblem bits, though, in a way people can hopefully get the gist of.

    I also apologize in advance to any residents of Utah reading this.

    Chapter 2: Welcoming Committee

    The four emerged in a grassy meadow, the portal quickly closing behind them as they gazed around curiously.

    "Doesn't look like anything too out of the ordinary..." said Dialga.

    "You'll see soon enough," said Palkia, "There should be a big city up ahea-"

    "What is that?!" said Hoopa.

    He was pointing to a brown shaggy creature, with round ears and sharp claws and teeth, sniffing at them cautiously.

    Palkia blinked. "Seems this is a bit further from home than expected - that's an animal, not a Pokemon."

    "A-animal?" said Hoopa.

    "They are beings touched by forces quite different from us Legendaries," said Dialga; "Like Pokemon, but feral and with only basal intelligence."

    "So that thing is a fucked-up Ursaring?" said Hoopa.

    "It's just a bear." said Palkia.

    "...Just a bear? Not an Ursaring or a Pangoro or a Beartic or a Bewear, just a bear?"

    "I... think it's a brown bear?" said Palkia, shrugging sheepishly.

    Hoopa crossed his arms. "They need to hire a new guy to name these things."

    "Can I keep it, though?" said Giratina.

    Everyone looked over to see Giratina was holding the bear and pinning its limbs from behind, the creature roaring and attempting to futilely claw and bite at him.

    "Giratina, no, you can't just adopt the local fauna in place like this!" said Dialga, scowling.

    "But it's soft and huggable," said Giratina, pouting.

    Palkia sighed. "Just keep it untill we get to Ylisse and we'll see what we do there."

    She headed off, everyone else following after, the bear still struggling and roaring in protest in Giratina's grip.

    --------

    The four eventually wandered far enough to reach the outskirts of a lavish city before them.

    "There it is! Oh, it looks just like the game, I'm so excited!"

    "Fancy place!" said Hoopa. "What's it called?"

    'Yilissitoll, capital of Yilisse!"

    "...The cities too?"

    Palkia shrugged. "Eh, I've heard worse. There's this city near a salt lake in a universe we stopped by one time, you know what they called it?"

    "...What?"

    "Salt Lake City."

    "...I'm suddenly grateful for our universe."

    Palkia smiled. "As a mon who helped make it, I appreciate that. That said, let's see this one up close, shall we?"

    The bear roared in protest again.

    "Hush, Wuzzles," said Giratina, patting the bear softly while maintaining his tight grip. "I'll get you snacks when we get to the city place."

    "Giratina, you were supposed to let that thing free when we got to the city!" said Dialga.

    "Er, actually," said Palkia, "Letting it loose this close to the city might be a problem."

    Hoopa put his hands on his hips. "...I'm not putting that in the Stash."

    Dialga glared at Giratina before shaking his head, sighing.

    "Please, just... Keep it pinned for now."

    "Thanks bro!" said Giratina, indeed hugging the protesting bear tighter.

    Everyone then headed into the city proper, marvelling at the elaborate and sturdy buildings, bustling locals of various walks of life, and the busy shops, stalls, and bazaars, ignoring the more than a few odd glances they got back themselves as they whispered among each other.

    "It looks so much like some of the cities in our world just a few hundred years ago..." said Dialga.

    "Quite the nostalgia trip, huh?" said Hoopa.

    "Still different from back home, though," said Giratina. "No Pokemon, humans dressed funny even for the time period, selling funky things at the shops..."

    "Speaking of which, we should stick to the plan trying to talk to anyone for now," said Palkia.

    "The "is that foreign" plan?" said Giratina.

    "Yep."

    "Hopefully we won't have to use it too soon..." said Dialga.

    "Yeah, better for now we-" said Palkia.

    She stopped froze, and grinned. "Scratch that, it's them!"

    Everyone else turned to see Palkia staring enraptured at four people nearby - a white-haired young man in a black-and purple coat, a taller, blue-haired young man dressed in blue armor with a white cape hanging behind him, an even taller, somewhat older man with brown hair and much heavier armor, and a teenage girl with long blonde hair in pigtails complimenting a strange, dress-like outfit, all looking over the items in a shop.

    "...Them?" said Dialga.

    "The Shepherds! Well, the four major ones. They're the main characters of the game!"

    "So they're the dudes we wanna hang with?'

    "Exactly!" said Palkia.

    "Sweet!" said Hoopa.

    He frowned. "Now how exactly do we get chummy with 'em?"

    Palkia froze and paled. "I don't know; I didn't think we'd get this far."

    Dialga groaned. "Can't we just go up and ask them?"

    "I don't think that's how it works... here we're the nobodies and they're the big shots!"

    "Then how do you suggest we-"

    The quartet then heard a scream.

    "Bandits! To the south!"

    The group of disguised Legendaries then saw a farmer barge through the streets in panic toward the Shepherds as they quickly turned to address him.

    "Bandits? In this time?" said the tall, sturdily-armored man.

    "Armed burglars, sir!" Whole bunch of them headed straight for our village!"

    The blue-haired man scowled. "We'll deal with them right away."

    "If they're just a bunch of theives they should be no problem for us," said his white-haied companion.

    "Yeah!" said the girl, pumping her fists. "Especially if they're dumb enough to attack this close to home!"

    The four of them and the farmer rushed off, leaving the multiversal visitors staring after.

    "Well," said Dialga, "They certainly seem to have the problem under control themselves..."

    Palkia hesitated, then grinned. "Actually, I have a plan."

    "Ooh, what, sis?" said Giratina.

    "We help the Shepherds with their little bandit problem."

    "So we're gonna impress 'em to get 'em on our side? I like this plan."

    "I'm not so keen," said Dialga, "didn't we agree to keep things nonlethal?"

    "That's part of the plan," said Palkia, grinning. "You see..."

    The four huddled together amidst the crowd. A bit later, several onlookers stopped and stared when they seemed to vanish.

    ------------

    The village was battened down in their houses, a few farmers armed with crude makeshift weapons outside. Even then, they knew they didn't stand a chance against the rapidly-approaching raiders.

    It was then a young, pink-haired woman in some bizarre-looking white-and-pink battle dress wielding a staff with a pearl-like orb at the end stepped out into the streets almost too calmly.

    "Easy boys," she said, "me and my friends have this covered. Can I just borrow a horse?"

    "M-m'am, you're crazy' there's-"

    "Sir, I can save your village just fine either way, but it's better with the horse."

    "...There's a draft horse in the stables, but she's used for till-"

    He didn't get to finish, as the woman had vanished in a warp in space and emerged atop the draft horse in question just out of range of the bandits. The horse reared in panic before Palkia calmed it with a soothing aura from her Lustrous Orb staff and addressed the bewildered men before her with a smirk.

    "Now you all hold still so we can make this easy."

    The bandits blinked collectively before one stepped forward to face her with a scowl.

    "And what makes you think you're some one-woman army?"

    Palkia gave a dismissive wave of her hand and chuckled. "Ooh, you're all so cute trying to be little bandit-wandits out to kidnap the crops and burn the women, but you're still being naughty and need to be punished..."

    She pulled out and opened out a dark blue book several of the bandits backed away nervously from.

    "...But first you all need a bath."

    Blue Unown-like runes spiraled upward from the book as a massive wave emerged in front of Palkia and swept the bandits back. As they gasped and spluttered trying to get to their feet afterwards a chill ran down their spines as a bear roared followed by a man shouting:

    "Sneak attack, Wuzzles!"

    The bandits screamed as a blonde, red-eyed man emerged from nearby shrubs atop a roaring bear, slicing at each of them with his sword...

    ...Only for the sword strikes to miss each and every one of them by a hair's length, instead opening dimensional portals that punted them screaming through the Distortion World only to fall through a much larger portal that landed them on the ground almost out of sight of the village.

    As they got to their feet, they noticed a man with shaggy blue hair and long fleshy ears fiddling with a diamond-like orb.

    "Okay, so I need to change to the right form to use my pow-"

    Suddenly he was enveloped in a blue, crystalline cocoon, emerging as an enormous, monstrous blue rabbit with markings and armor plating reminiscent of his dragon form.

    "...I'm a bunny?!"

    He recovered from his shock just in time to see the bandits fling axes and spears at him. He sighed as his eyes glowed, the weapons stopping in midair and rusting and rotting into dust within seconds.

    "...Let's just get this over with."

    He rushed up to each bandit and dealt them precision headbutts and kicks, sending them flying and screaming yet again into a dazed pile.

    "Now we've thoroughly gotten your attention," said a voice, "let's keep it!"

    A youth appeared and threw golden hoops atop the pile of bandits, each squeezing in to bind them in place. Once he was done Hoopa gave the dazed, trapped pile of bandits a wave.

    "Thank you for attending this show of "How Not to Plunder a Village!" We hope for your sake it was educational."

    Dialga reverted to his more humanlike form as Palkia approached on the draft horse's back and Giratina approached on Wuzzles. A few of the trapped bandits started at Wuzzles sniffing them, at which Giratina shushed him.

    "Wuzzles, they are not snacks. I will get you your snacks back in town."

    "Speaking of which," said Dialga, "Where are those humans Palkia said were so important anyway?"

    "They should be here any minute now..." said Palkia.

    Indeed, the other quartet and the farmer soon ran up to the scene only to look at it baffled.

    "What in the name of the gods...?" said the blue-haired one.

    "...It seems we've been beaten to our objective," said the shorter, white-haired man.

    "That was already apparent, but how?" said the third, tallest man.

    "Aw, phooey!" said the girl. "I hate missing out!"

    ~Alright, who does the introductions?~ said Hoopa telepathically.

    ~I'll start.~ said Palkia.

    She turned to the other group.

    "Oh, hey! Sorry if we messed anything up taking care of these guys!"

    "It's fine!" said the farmer. "You saved our village before the Shepereds even could!"

    "We're part of said Sheperds by the way," said the blue-haired man."I'm Chrom, my companions here are Robin..."

    He gestures to the white-haired young man in the coat.

    ~He's one of my favorites!~ said Palkia to everyone in her group.

    "Fredrick..."continued Chrom, guesturing to his older, taller companion, "and Lissa," guesturing to the blonde teenager.

    "You certainly seem skilled from how easily you seem to have dealt with those bandits!" said Robin, looking at the multiversal group in admiration.

    He then furrowed his brow. "What land are you even from, though? You certainly seem like an unusual bunch."

    "We're from the esoteric faraway land of Cincinatii," said Dialga dryly.

    "It's got some great views and locales and good food!" said Palkia

    "The sports teams kind of suck, tho-" said Giratina.

    Palkia nudged him with a foot before continuing.

    "Anyway," said Palkia, "I'm Valentia, this is Quentin, this is Howard, and this is Bartemaeus," she said, gesturing to each of them in turn.

    "Pleasure to meet you all," said Chrom, nodding.

    He smiled. "And for being so helpful here... If you need a place to stay from so far off why not with us?"

    Frederick raised an eyebrow. "...Mlord, this time you cannot be serious."

    "Frederick, you've known Chrom far longer than I have," said Robin. "He's always serious about these things."

    ~Chrom's the nice one,~ said Palkia telepathically. ~He's our ace in the hole for getting in with these guys without too much trouble!~

    "But... We have no records of this Cincinatti place anywhere in Yilisse! They look more like travelling circus performers than anything!"

    "Hey!" said Hoopa, gesturing to his outfit. "Don't tell me this isn't stylish."

    Robin looked over the pile of bandits. "If they were circus performers or enemies they wouldn't have subdued what appear to be remnants of Gangrel's army so quickly or easily..."

    ~Gangrel's the guy that started the war right before this peacetime. He's a douche.~, said Palkia.

    "Yeah!" said Lissa. "And if they're so tough, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!"

    She scrunched her face up. "Or... The other way around. Kinda. Mabye. You get my point!"

    "If we could chill with you guys that'd be pretty cool," said Giratina.

    "What Howard said!" said Hoopa.

    "I suppose despite my own caution I'll agree," said Dialga.

    Fredrick looked between them all and sighed. "Alright... But everyone, keep an eye on these.... Cincinnatians."

    Robin gave a small bow to Palkia. "It's a pleasure to have you all with us."

    Palkia bowed back. "You as well."

    Internally, she gave an excited fangirl squeal. We're partying with the Shepherds! This is gonna be great!

    ***

    And so things seem to be going smoothly for our team so far. Emphasis on so far. We'll see happens when they meet the rest of the Shepherds next chapter- which, sadly, may take a bit longer than this one to come out for a few things I have to take care of on my end. Don't worry, though- I know full well what comes next, so when the time arrives you readers will too.
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 25th July 2016 at 3:28 AM.

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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  5. #5
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    "Eh, I've heard worse. There's this city near a salt lake in a universe we stopped by one time, you know what they called it?"

    "...What?"

    "Salt Lake City."
    I'm dying. Honestly, jokes about my capital city are the best thing. (Take me down to the Salt Lake City where there's salt and lakes and the lakes are salty!)

    "We're from the esoteric faraway land of Cincinatii," said Dialga dryly.

    "It's got some great views and locales and good food!" said Palkia

    "The sports teams kind of suck, tho-" said Giratina.
    Again, I just... I really like your humor, my guy.

    Oh man. You've got some really good dialogue and characterizations going on here. I like the concept too, it's interesting and the crossover flows quite smoothly. You've also got some reaally good interaction, the relationships between characters are clear.

    Now, ah, one thing you gotta watch out for. You've got a lotta characters here, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But you gotta be really clear with your tags and who says what. Not gonna lie, there were a couple times where I got kind of lost, and I didn't know who was talking. Just somethin' to think about I guess.

    Overall though, I really like this! I'm excited to see where it goes! *thumbs up emoji*

    Quote Originally Posted by Schade
    Have you ever played Hide and seek? I love that game, because you never know who's gonna be the duck, and who's gonna be the goose.
    thesketchqueen everywhere else on the internet. don't call me a girl, thanks.
    role player profile . tumblr . claims . art . coronet designs

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sketchie View Post
    I'm dying. Honestly, jokes about my capital city are the best thing. (Take me down to the Salt Lake City where there's salt and lakes and the lakes are salty!)
    >apologizes to Utah natives in advance about that gag

    >guy from Utah is first to respond

    >thinks it's hilarious.

    ...Not sure if flattered.

    Again, I just... I really like your humor, my guy.
    OK, definitely flattered here; am really glad the humor in this fic is hitting its mark so far.

    (Also as a Cincinnati native I can confirm all of those things are true.)

    Oh man. You've got some really good dialogue and characterizations going on here. I like the concept too, it's interesting and the crossover flows quite smoothly. You've also got some reaally good interaction, the relationships between characters are clear.
    Aaah, yeah! The affirmation on all those is pretty great too.

    Now, ah, one thing you gotta watch out for. You've got a lotta characters here, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But you gotta be really clear with your tags and who says what. Not gonna lie, there were a couple times where I got kind of lost, and I didn't know who was talking. Just somethin' to think about I guess.
    Ah, thank you for pointing that out! Usually I try to stay consistent here, but looking back I may not have done as well as intended, whoops. Will definitely keep n mind for future chapters considering the character count is soon to go up.

    Overall though, I really like this! I'm excited to see where it goes! *thumbs up emoji*
    Thank you! I'm working on something else ATM, but hope to have Chapter 3 up soon after!

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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    To be honest, I was convinced this fic wasn't going to be my cup of tea.

    I was wrong.

    First I actually liked the light-hearted contrast between Palkia's eager and upbeated nature compared to Dialga's deadpan and more reserved nature. I'm not exactly well versed when it comes to humor or that kind of stuff. But I actually enjoyed the light nature of this fic so keep it up.

    But a few things I'd keep an eye out for is give some 'action' behind the speech. Instead of saying 'said' all the time, try something like exclaimed or snarked so that we can get an idea of 'how' the character said their line.

    I'd be more indepth with my review, but I don't have the luxury sadly, still keep it up. Looking forward to some more!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Level10CatWarrior View Post
    To be honest, I was convinced this fic wasn't going to be my cup of tea.

    I was wrong.
    PLOT TWIST!

    But yay for defied expectations there!

    First I actually liked the light-hearted contrast between Palkia's eager and upbeated nature compared to Dialga's deadpan and more reserved nature. I'm not exactly well versed when it comes to humor or that kind of stuff. But I actually enjoyed the light nature of this fic so keep it up.
    Yeah, the contrast between the personalities of those two characters has always been a fun one to play with, and glad you found it works - they're two of the central characters, after all.

    I will warn you this story isn't going to stay purely lighthearted as it goes along, so there will be my abilities with drama to consider if that doesn't turn you off right away. It's still going to maintain a distinct sense of humor throughout, however, if that helps.

    But a few things I'd keep an eye out for is give some 'action' behind the speech. Instead of saying 'said' all the time, try something like exclaimed or snarked so that we can get an idea of 'how' the character said their line.
    Eh, that's one thing where I'd rather pass on the suggestion as-is; I find most dialogue tags other than "said" to be horribly redundant and more distracting from the dialogue than enhancing of it. Dialogue should literally speak for itself alongside character action.

    That said, if you brought that up because you felt there were places it didn't speak for itself rather than just my continued usage of "said" feel free to point them out.

    I'd be more indepth with my review, but I don't have the luxury sadly, still keep it up. Looking forward to some more!
    Haha, that's fine, I don't always post the most substantial reviews or review replies when I'm low on energy (and/or on a mobile device) myself. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 26th July 2016 at 6:08 PM.

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    Welp. Don't say I didn't warn you all. I've had a busy and often rather stressful past few months, but never the less I apologize deeply for getting a chapter this early in the fic out so long after the others.


    Nevertheless, here it finally is, and with some silly bonuses to hopefully make up for the wait:


    Chapter 3: Meet and Greet


    On the outskirts of Yilissitol, the four disguised Legendaries followed the four members of the Shepherds they had met into a decently sized set of barracks.


    ~So, there are more of them than these four?~ said Dialga.


    ~A bunch, and we still have to make sure we make a good impression on them too before we're fully clear,~ said Palkia.


    ~I promise Wuzzles won't eat anyone now he's gotten his snack,~ said Giratina.


    The bear in question roared.


    Hoopa winced and edged backwards, almost colliding with Lissa. ~I'd still keep a tight leash on that thing.~


    Thankfully, Wuzzles was stowed away in a stable before the four of them were led inside; upon reaching the interior they discovered they indeed had an ensemble before them. People of various shapes and sizes, all performing various tasks like polishing weapons and armor and sorting spellbooks, not in immediate rush for war, but constant readiness for trouble.


    Palkia was barely able to contain another fangirl squeal until she unleashed it upon her companions telepathically, much to their annoyance.


    ~Aaaaaaaa! They're all here! Well, most of them - a few don't show up until later, but still, this is so exciting!~


    ~So do we introduce ourselves or wha-~ Hoopa started to say.


    ~I've got that,~ said Palkia. ~Kinda.~


    She scooched over to Robin and tapped him
    on the shoulder.


    "Er, your name is Robin, yes?"


    Robin turned to her and nodded. "Yes it is!"


    "Um, could you introduce us to everybody? There's a lot."


    "Hmmm... Alright. But Chrom should probably start that off."


    Chrom nodded and turned to the busy Shepherds.


    "Everybody! We have some new recruits!"


    The others all raised their heads and looked toward Chrom as he gestured to the disguised Legendaries in turn.


    "These are Quentin, Valentia, Howard, and Bartimaeus of Cincinnati! They're looking forward to meeting you all!"


    The other Shepherds stared and muttered amidst each other quizzically.


    ~I don't believe they like us...~ said Dialga.


    ~We oughta fix that,~ said Giratina.


    ~Easy guys, we haven't made the rounds yet...~ said Palkia.


    The four were led over by Chrom over to a woman in a witch-like outfit.


    "This here is Miriel, one of our mages..."


    Miriel gazed the new arrivals up and down analytically.


    "You Cincinnatians will be useful for cultural research at the very least..."


    They moved over to what appeared to be a demure blonde woman in priestess gear.


    "And this is Libra, another healer..."


    Giratina wiggled his eyebrows. "Hey gorgeo-"


    "I'm a man," said Libra, immediately cutting Giratina off.


    "Oh," said Giratina. ~Right.~


    He looked at Libra from another angle. "...Still pretty ho-"


    "Gi- Er, Howard, what did I tell you?" said Palkia.


    Giratina immediately fell silent. Libra simply raised an eyebrow in response. Awkwardly, Chrom shuffled over to a teenage boy in villager clothes and a pot on his head.


    "Er, and this is Donnel!"


    Donnel looked at the group nervously. "My folks always warned me about strange people like these..."


    Palkia smiled. "Don't worry, Donnel! You've got nothing to fea-"


    She noticed a presence approaching her.


    "Bonjour, madamosel-"


    Without another word she backhanded the offending blue-haired man in aristocratic clothing, knocking him to the floor.


    Chrom frowned. "Virion, what did I tell you?"


    Virion groaned. "In my defense... I did not expect her to react so strongly..."


    Robin, having been watching the whole affair nervously, finally chipped in. "Er, that's Virion, our main archer. He's... working on his manners."


    ~I always liked that guy's style,~ said Giratina.


    ~That's because you're not too far off.~ said Palkia.


    ~Hopefully my species won't attract much undue attention,~ said Dialga.


    He then realized he was being closely scrutinized by a female of what appeared to be the same lapine kind of person he was. ~...And you know what they say about tempting fate.~


    "Who are you?" the vaguely rabbit-like woman asked him. "How are you even here?"


    "Oh, that's Panne," said Robin. "You'd think she'd be more pleased to see you, her species is... nearly extinct...


    "Almost completely extinct, save for me. And I'm not sure to get my hopes up convincing myself this... Quentin is truly another survivor."


    "It's a long story; fittingly it also involves temporal shenanigans," said Dialga.


    Panne's nose twitched. "I have sharp ears, like yours. I still know the voice of someone who's bending the truth."


    "Um..." said Robin. "Alright, alright! We'll do the rest of the introductions later! Let's get you all to your rooms, Chrom, Lissa, Frederick, you take Quentin, Howard and Bartimaeus, respectively, I'll take Valentina, keep an an eye on them..."


    Frederick and Lissa grumbled and Chrom looked between everyone with concern as the disguised Legendaries were led off; however, once everyone else was out of eyeshot Giratina opened a pocket dimension, jumped inside, closed it, then created another opening he pulled Hoopa into before closing it again.


    <Hey!> said Hoopa after he and Giratina had re-attained their natural forms. <What are you doing?!>


    Giratina shook his head. <Face it Hoops, these guys don't like us. Not even the guys we impressed with sis' plan are Pecha-y with us anymore. We gotta show 'em our stuff again.>


    Hoopa put his mitt-hands on his hips. <Well why'd you bring just me along for that?>


    <First. You're the only one who never pissed anyone off, dude.>


    Hoopa blinked and grinned. <...Wait, really? For that long? That's a new record!>


    Giratina nodded. <Second. You got a ukulele in your Stash?>


    Hoopa nodded back. <Several. Why?>


    Giratina smirked. <My plan involves getting musical. Among other things.>


    Hoopa grimaced. <Please tell me the whole thing so I know it isn't more Bunnelby-brained than that Panne lady.>


    -----------


    Palkia followed Robin into the deeper parts of the barracks.


    It's just a setback, she thought. We'll win them over eventually, just...


    Suddenly, not looking where she was going, she tripped and gave a yell as she landed on her back. Feeling something digging into her leg, she looked and saw it had been entangled in rusty chains.


    And that was when memories of what had been the root reason for this "vacation" rushed to her mind.


    ------------


    The Red Chain.


    It bound them both, digging into their otherwise sturdy bodies with crimson links all over, each crimson link resembling the wheel on Arceus' back, the spines delving into their skin, causing immense agony.


    She wanted to reach out to Dialga, help him, but her will was not her own. She, the deity of space, was bound by these puppet string chains to the mortal human man standing before her, as was her brother.


    Helpless, she watched as the man started to use their power to create a new universe, one built in his image, to his whims. She tried to roar in agony, but her actions, and Dialga's, were not her own. It was over.


    Untill a shadow pooled and someone familiar lunged from it.


    <D I R T Y S I B L I N G T O R T U R E R>



    -----


    Palkia screamed, and desperately tried to shake the chains off.


    "Valentia!" said Robin. "Here, I'll get those off!"


    He quickly untangled her leg from the chains, Palkia immediately getting to her feet and shuddering.


    "Th-Thank you... It's just that..."


    Robin frowned. "Were you someone's slave? A prisoner? What happened?"


    Palkia paused a long while before replying.


    "I... I was enslaved by someone, yes... As was Quentin... Howard saved us..."


    Robin rubbed his chin. "No wonder you all have been acting fidgety..."


    He gave her a reassuring smile. "Well, please, don't worry. You'll be safe with us. I certainly have been, as have many others."


    Palkia paused again, then nodded. "Thank you..."


    Robin started heading off to get her to a room. Palkia gazed not with fangirlish glee but more subdued respect after.


    He really is a good person to his good troops... Not just that, a friend...


    When she attempted to follow, however, the both of them heard raucous cheering from the mess hall.


    --------


    The Sheperds had gathered here to get ready for dinner.


    "Will those new guys be showing up?" said Donnel.


    "I certainly hope not, " said Miriel. "They don't seem too astute."


    "Perhaps we can get Kellam to-" Virion started to say.


    He looked around. "Where is he any-"


    He did a double take and sighed. "He's right behind me, I bet."


    "Actually," said Libra, "he's atop your shoulders."


    Virion immediately noticed a thickly built, sturdily armored man right there and collapsed from the weight.


    "Sorry," said Kellam, "Those new guys had me jumpy."


    "You're forgiven," said Virion with a groan.


    "Say, ain't that two of them over there?" said Donnel.


    Everyone looked to see a human Giratina sitting at the head of the table with a ukelele and wearing a sombrero, a human Hoopa and Wuzzles the bear on either side of him.


    "Hello, ladies and gents! Howard, Bartimaeus, and Wuzzles here, with a song and one hell of a treat!"


    Giratina started playing the ukelele with surprising proficiency.


    So one day I felt my job was a bore,


    And headed to the messed-up land of Orre,


    The populace was in absolute despair,


    I had to help or risk being square


    "We need food!" they all haplessly cried,


    So I was then a total bro and complied


    I whipped them all up one hell of a dish,


    One sure to more than grant such a wish


    They loved them and called them food of the gods


    I decided to call them burritos just 'cause.


    "Sir, in order to back up your claims you ought to show us these "burritos" yourself," said Miriel.


    "Just a minute, lady!" said Hoopa. "Several orders, coming right up!"


    He pulled out some ingredients from one of his hoops that Giratina started preparing while continuing the song.


    First the tortilla, soft and tender and flat


    Your stale crunchy loaves just can't top that


    Get some rice, stuff it together nice and tight


    Then you pile it with beans and meats just right


    Stuff it with corn, stuff it with cheese,


    Stuff it with anything you damn well please,


    Wrap it all together, and day or night


    You'll find that this little bundle's a delight.


    Giratina made several burritos and handed them out with Hoopa and Wuzzles' help to the Sheperds, who took large bites out of the ones they received.


    "Hmm... This is actually quite appetizing." said Libra.


    "Golly, this almost beats my ma's cooking!" said Donnel.


    "This is a meal I can notice!" said Kellam.


    "This burrito is magnifique!" said Virion.


    "Preach it, Kalosian dude! You all rock!" said Giratina.


    Virion blinked. "Kalosian?"


    He is ignored as Giratina was raised on a platform with lights, strumming his ukelele like an electric guitar with Hoopa and Wuzzles in burrito suits as backup dancers.


    Burritos can cure any disease,


    And smite evil with the greatest of ease!


    Your old medieval delicacies are so yesterday,


    Especially if you've got guacamol-ay!


    So go ahead and take a seat-o


    And enjoy your delicious, nutritious burrito!


    The Sheperds cheered as Hoopa and Wuzzles passed them all an extra round of burritos; soon after, Robin, Palkia, Dialga, Chrom, Fredrick, and Lissa rushed in on the scene.


    "What in the name of the gods...?" said Fredrick.


    "I'm not sure if this is a better or worse mess!" said Lissa.


    "Everyone seems happy at least..." said Chrom.


    Two people emerged from the crowd holding burritos, a short, crimson-haired woman in similarly red armor, and a taller, green-haired young man in matching green armor.


    "These burritos are gonna be great for meals!" said the green-haired man. "I wonder if these Cincinnatians know any other recipes..."


    "We do," said Dialga flatly.


    "Then you guys are keepers!" said the crimson-haired woman.


    Chrom turned to Dialga and Palkia, shrugged, and smiled sheepishly. "Well then. Welcome aboard for real."


    Robin smiled reassuringly and extended a hand toward Palkia. "Glad to have you."


    Palkia smiled back and shook Robin's hand...


    ...Only to feel a distinct, disturbing feeling of corruption seep up her arm. She resisted the urge to shudder and broke the handshake with Robin as naturally as she could, double-checking to see- yes, it was that hand.


    She shook her head, gave a nervous smile, and looked on at the proceedings.


    She'd played this game. Literally. She knew the Sheperds - especially Robin, he was strong - would clean up that particular problem by themselves.


    ***

    And there you have it! Again, I deeply apologize for the wait, and while making guarantees tends to end badly for me for things like this, I fully intend for Chapter 4 to come out in a more timely fashion! In the meantime, hope everyone reading enjoyed this installment, and as a bonus have a lovely illustration of Palkia's human disguise by Zu-Art!
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 15th November 2016 at 5:53 PM.

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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    Well, here's Chapter 4! This is where we get into a more experimental aspect of this fic - one the chapter title has some meaning to.


    Chapter 4: A Matter Of Time


    It had been about a couple weeks now, and the multiversal visitors were starting to get along with and get to know the multitude of Shepherds, all settling in.


    One of the Shepherds, though, was not so settled.


    Virion was attempting to move stealthily through the barracks, and failing, considering he quickly literally bumped into a ginger-haired young man in a black cloak and headband, causing the latter to nearly choke on the lollipop he was sucking on.


    "Hey! Watch where you're going!"


    "Ah! Sorry, Gaius - Do you happen to know where Libra is?"


    "I've got no clue where Padre is, I was looking for Bubbles! Why don't you ask The Invisible Man?"


    Virion blinked. "Why are you looking for Robin and why did you specify Kellam?"


    "I'm right here?" said Kellam, suddenly beside him.


    Virion gave a high-pitched yelp as he jumped into Gaius' arms. "How do you do that?"


    Kellam shrugged. "It just kind of happens. But Libra's on the loft, praying. You probably shouldn't disturb him too quickly."


    "Duly noted!"


    Virion would have leapt out of Gaius' arms right there if Gaius didn't drop him first. He picked himself up and dusted himself off before dashing over to the loft and finding Libra sitting there, indeed praying.


    Virion stood there a while fidgeting and nervously sweating before Libra finally spoke normally without moving a bit.


    "...You can talk to me now, Virion."


    Virion wiped his brow, adjusted his ruff, and gulped. "It's about those Cincinnatians."


    "What about them? They've been much more well-behaved since they first got here, especially when they help with the cooking."


    Virion shook his head. "It's not about how they are now they've been here a while, it's about how they got here at all! You're a priest, a spiritual man... Haven't you noticed anything metaphysically strange about them?"


    Libra paused before finally standing up and turning around to face Virion. "Yes, actually, I have... Subdued, well-hidden, but it's still detectable by someone of my cloth."


    "Aha!" said Virion. "Fantastique, further evidence!"


    Libra raised an eyebrow. "Evidence?"


    "It all started when Howard referred to me as Kalosian. Now, I could believe that people as bizarre as him and his companions were from some esotetic faraway land, but when he mistook me for being from another, I grew suspicious. So I looked through every geographical book I could, even" - he shuddered - "sneaking into Miriel's personal library! And there was no mention of a Kalos or a Cincinnati anywhere!"


    Libra put a hand to his chin. "That is direly suspicious..."


    "And what's more, all the strange spells they seem capable of - Valentia's manipulation of water and space, Quentin's seeming bending of time in lapine form, Howard's mix of dimensional and dark magic, and that one time Bartimaeus did a "trick" to turn into a muscular strongman but was stuck that way for three days - they seem out of this world!"


    Virion put his own hand to his chin. "And given the existence of a certain Outrealm Gate they may very well be!"


    "So," said Libra dryly, "I assume you want my help figuring out what's really up with these 'Cincinnatians.'"


    Virion grinned. "Oui! Precisely!"


    Libra raised an eyebrow. "Why me though?"


    "Because you're one of the few men I find att-"


    Virion gave a hacking cough before regaining his composure.


    "-Attentive enough to the divine and spiritual for this task, of course! With their strange powers, these 'Cincinnatians' could be spirits or even deities from another world! That's your department, is it not?"


    Libra paused, then nodded. "True... If they were beings of great metaphysical power from another world intruding on ours it could cause a stir amidst the gods..."


    "Alright then!" said Virion. "Let's figure out what's really going on!"


    He headed off. Libra hesitated, then followed.


    ---------


    Dialga was off away from the barracks, trying to get some peace and quiet in a small wooded area with sunlight dappling through the trees onto moss and fallen leaves.


    However, the sharp Taguel ears of his current form made the "quiet" part a fair bit harder, being able to hear every crack of a branch and every rustle of a leaf and every breath of all creatures in a very large vicinity.


    "Hello, Panne," he said without turning around.


    Panne stopped behind him, twitching her nose.


    "I suppose you want something?" said Dialga.


    "In a sense," Panne said back.


    She started circling him.


    "Your time with the Sheperds has proven to me you are no threat. But I still doubt you are truly one of my own kind. Who are you, really?"


    "A visitor," said Dialga. "From another time, another place."


    "I still hear the voice of someone bending the truth. But I've said that enough. Can you hear something for me?"


    Dialga shifted slightly. "Tell what?"


    Panne looked through the treetops up to the sky. "The old Taguel gods; I wonder if you could hear them. There were those of my kind that could hear them in days long past, but they are gone now. Can you hear them now?"


    Dialga turned his ears, and more metaphysical senses, up to the sky. He heard and felt something, but nothing coherent enough for him to make out.


    "...Only whispers."


    Panne sighed. "They may be gone or leaving now; there's nothing left of my race but me. And... You, possibly, Quentin."


    Dialga was silent as Panne looked off in another direction.


    "I... Honestly kind of envy the man-spawn and those scaly Manaketes for still having theirs to pray to; they've got one mutual one they particularly revere, especially in Ylisse..."


    Dialga perked one of his ears. "Which would that be?"


    Panne glanced back at at him and raised an eyebrow. "I do not know why you would be interested, but they call her Naga the Divine Dragon."


    "A dragon goddess?" said Dialga. "How curious."


    Panne turned her head east as Dialga turned to face her. "She answers the prayers of the Manaketes, at least. And she's said to appear before those worthy of her to the east of here at Mount Prism."


    She glanced at Dialga and looked away, shaking her head. "But I don't see any reason for you to take interest in the likes of her..."


    She slowly walked off the way she came.


    Dialga waited until she could hear her no longer, then turned his ears and divine senses to Mount Prism, expecting to hear nothing more than whispers again.


    He was startled to hear and sense something much louder.


    "...You don't know how wrong you are, Panne."


    He shifted to his lapine form and ran to Mount Prism.


    ------


    Atop Mount Prism, Dialga perked his ears and sniffed around a forested area with ruins of what appeared to be some sort of shrine scattered around a large waterfall at the center of a peak.


    "There's really not much here... Could this truly be the home of a go-"


    "A... Visitor?" a booming, yet feminine, voice rang out. "I never get visitors."


    The waterfall parted, and a woman, tall with flowing green hair and pointed ears, stepped forth from it. Dialga immediately tilted his currently rabbit-like head at her outfit - the bottom half was a long, billowing skirt accompanied by a similar scarf, but the top was something so scanty the being before him was showing most of her skin.


    "Isn't that a little risque by human standards? I mean, it's not as bad as what those slavers stuffed that Nowi girl into, but still, you have to worry about how you present yourself to mortals! And aren't you cold, given how high the altitude is?"


    The woman stared in surprise before shaking her head and chuckling. "I'd never thought I'd get critique of my fashion sense from a Taguel of all beings. Especially given they're critically endangered."


    She furrowed her brow at Dialga. "Though... Given what I sense emanating off of you, and your strange coloration... You're no true Taguel, are you?"


    Dialga sighed. "Very well. It's hard enough keeping it hidden from Panne, and I came to find you because I was seeking a being like my true self..."


    At this the Adamant Orb attached to his waist glowed, and the woman stared in shock and awe as his form glowed and stretched into its more natural shape. Dialga stretched his limbs to get readjusted, then turned to face the stunned woman.


    "They call me Dialga. You are Naga, correct?"


    The woman stared in shock a bit longer before shaking her head and nodding "Yes, I am Naga, the one called the Divine Dragon. But my question back is... What in this world are you?"


    Dialga huffed. "That's the clincher; I am not of this world. I am another world's god of time come here for a visit. It has mostly proved relaxing so far. But I was hoping to see what at least one of the local pantheon was like."


    Naga smiled, and gave a respectful bow. "It is an honor then, Dialga."


    She sighed and shook her head. "But I am no god. I am no creator. I possess not the powers of making or unmaking."


    Dialga gave her a quizzical look. "You're not? The Manaketes and the Yilliseans seem to hold you in high enough regard. And you have given the Yilliseans your blessing, have you not?"


    "What divinity I have is as a protector and guardian," said Naga. "I can indirectly aid but take no direct action."


    She looked out over the landscape. "It has been this way for millennia... I have taken many forms over all that time... I have not always been a woman... I have not always been a dragon, even..."


    She sighed. "But memories of those fleeting times... They are not truly mine..."


    Dialga gave her a look again. "How so?"


    Naga looked at him almost solemnly. "I am not the first Naga... There have been others before me... The role and memories are passed down from one incarnation to the next. It is a burden, but one I must bear to help both human and Manakete."


    Dialga shifted uncomfortably. "If it helps, there are those of status like mine back home who must go through similar tribulations..."


    "Which gets me back to my first question," said Naga, giving Dialga a stern look. "What are you, other than a dragon god of time from another world?"


    Dialga paused, then sighed.


    "To put it at its most basic level, I am a Pokemon."


    Naga blinked. "A... Pokemon?"


    "They are the creatures of my world, coming in a wide variety of shapes and sizes and elemental attributes. They range from mere sapient versions of the 'animals' of your world to beings of divine power like myself. I may be a deity, but I am still a Pokemon all the same, and one classified by others of my world as being elementally affiliated with Dragon and Steel, affiliations I share with countless other lesser Pokemon."


    Naga paused, then stepped forward, extending a hand. "May I?"


    Dialga raised an eyebrow. "May I what?"


    "Touch you."


    Dialga cringed. "I'm hoping not... in a bad place that's no good. Especially since you'll be out of luck there in this form."


    Upon realizing what he was saying Naga cringed herself. "Oh g-goodness, no! I just... Argh, I just wanted to touch your scales to test something, but if that makes you uncomfortable I can-"


    Dialga sighed in relief. "If that's it that's totally fine, thank you."


    Naga sighed in relief herself as she closed her eyes and extended her hand to stroke Dialga's scales as he stood perfectly still. Eventually, she smiled.


    "You're right... Your scales are much like a Manaketete's, but have the texture and hardness of the finest plate armor..."


    She stepped back, opened her eyes, and looked up at him.


    "What are the other 'Pokemon' of your world like?"


    Dialga shifted uncomfortably again. "Well, there's my siblings, and our companion, but they're more like me. Let me try to show you something more mundane, hold on..."


    He turned around and shuffled about in a place Naga couldn't see and turned back to her with a strange clamshell-like object in his mouth that he placed down in front of her, then moved over to seat himself next to her as he opened up the device with his mind, causing a panel on the upper half to glow to life as Dialga pressed buttons on the bottom half telekinetically.


    "This will take just a second, hold on..."


    Naga watched in fascination as the panel showed a icon-laden picture of Dialga and two similar dragons posing for an awkward groupshot, then a blank white space filled with oddly shaped brown boxes. She noticed Dialga move a small, arrow-like icon to a brown box with the words "cute cat pokemon videos" on the bottom and selected it to reveal a large amount of pictures with strange boxed bars across the top and bottom. Dialga selected one with the words "littenandfamily.avi" attached to the bottom.


    Immediately the screen was taken up by a vision of a small, red-and-black catlike creature pawing at the front of the panel.


    "Oh!" said Naga. "It's adorable! What sort of cat is that creature?"


    Dialga turned to her and smiled. "A Litten."


    "Lit-ten?"


    "You'll see what I mean in a bit."


    A human girl scooped the Litten up in a hug. Naga blinked in surprise.


    "There are humans in your world?"


    "Plenty. They live and work together with the Pokemon."


    The Litten struggled and mewled in the girl's grip before letting out an annoyed "Lit!" and spitting a flaming furball out into the grass before them, causing the girl to drop it in surprise. Naga gasped and chuckled. "I suppose Litten are affiliated with fire?"


    Dialga nodded. "Yep, they're Fire-types."


    The Litten's fiery hairball was patted out by a larger creature resembling a cross between a Litten and a bobcat, which the Litten batted at playfully. Naga gasped again. "Is that an adult Litten?"


    Dialga shook his head. "Not quite. Pokemon can transform into more powerful Pokemon as part of their life cycle. Litten transforms into Torracat there when the time is right..."


    The Litten and Torracat are scooped up by a third, bipedal creature resembling a cross between the previous two and a tiger, who started licking them affectionately.


    "...And then into Incineroar."


    The vision stopped, and Dialga dissipated it with the same icon he used to open it. Naga looked back up toward him. "Your world seems amazing already! Do all Pokemon transform like that Litten do?"


    Dialga chuckled. "It depends; Pokemon of stature like mine typically don't do anything quite like that. We're powerful enough as is."


    He thought a bit, then gave a frown.


    "Speaking of which... Others and yourself refer to you as a dragon, and yet you have kept this pointy-eared human form this whole time! Is this simply your latest incarnation, or what?"


    Naga frowned deeply. "Not quite... You are my first true visitor in a long while, so I suppose I shall show you..."


    She pulled a stone out of her dress and rubbed it, chanting. She was enveloped in energy that to Dialga resembled a more floral Mega Evolution cocoon before emerging as a massive, golden dragon that gave a mighty roar and spread its mighty, leaf-like wings to show their full splendor and display their owner's glittering golden scales. It was Dialga's turn to stare in awe.


    Naga looked at him, smiling, for a while before her eyes flashed red and she snarled before recovering.


    "Ugh..."


    She quickly reverted back to her more humanlike form and groaned again, clutching her head.


    "Are you alright?" said Dialga.


    "Yes, I am... It's just..."


    She gave him a solemn look.


    "The dragons of this world, including the Manakete, have a curse placed upon us... Where we eventually succumb to madness that robs us of our sapience as our lives go on..."


    She shook her head sadly.


    "It's already too late for the wyverns... Even the mighty Starfall clan have been reduced to feral scavengers and thieves... We Manaketes have only survived by assuming human form most of our lives... And part of why I must change vessels every few millennia..."


    Dialga listened intently, then shook his head sadly himself.


    "I could not imagine if such a curse was placed upon the mortal Dragon-types of my world..."


    He hurriedly stowed his laptop away, then turned to leave. "I shouldn't have brought you to do such a thing so risky to yourself... If you need rest after that, I shall take my leave now..."


    "Dialga, wait!" said Naga.


    Dialga stopped. "What is it?"


    Naga hesitated before continuing. "During your trip... Could you come back and visit me from time to time? Teach me more of your world?"


    Dialga paused, then glanced back and smiled.


    "...I most certainly will."


    His Adamant Orb glowed, and he shifted back to his more lapine Taguel form as he bounded off.


    --------


    Panne tried to remain completely silent as Dialga bounded past her.


    This explained so much, and yet she still had so many questions. She had managed to hear Dialga heading off toward Mount Prism and followed, and had discovered he was a bizarre being called a "Pokemon" from another world, and one of enough divine power to be on speaking terms with Naga herself.


    Question was, what was such a being doing in their world?


    She bounded off to the barracks herself, making sure to approach from a far different direction than Dialga. She could not forgive him for masquerading as her species, but there was too much risk exposing him outright, especially given his companions were likely of the same magnitude of power as he, and she still didn't know of their motivations. Thinking further, she realized that Libra would be a good initial aid for this given his knowledge of the divine...


    ...And was also of the sort not to recruit particularly numbskulled man-spawn to their cause.


    ***


    And there you have it! I must warn you all that I'm going to be shifting focus temporarily to another project again (and possibly Yuletide pinchhitting), but still hope to have Chapter 5 of this up sooner than the last time I did so!


    Also, if you're wondering about a reference to a noncanon "Starfall clan" in there, that was reference to some fun I had writing about Awakening elsewhere. It may be relevant to this fic, it may not be, we'll see!
    Last edited by Umbramatic; 10th December 2016 at 9:39 PM.

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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  11. #11
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    Let's keep up the pace! After a Giratina and Hoopa-centric chapter and a Dialga-centric chapter, time to move on to Palkia!

    Chapter 5: Awkward Relations

    Panne burst into Libra's room.

    "There you are, manspawn! There's something you need to know about-"

    She skidded to a stop in horror upon seeing Virion already there with Libra.

    "Panne! You could help us!" said Virion. "We suspect there's something... suspicious going on with the Cincinnatians!"

    Panne twitched. "I already know."

    Libra raised an eyebrow. "Taguel ears?"

    "More like seeing the one posing as one of my own kind turning into a dragon to consort with Naga."

    Virion paused. He slowly took a bottle of wine from a nearby shelf, poured some into a cup, and sipped it only to promptly spit it back out in delayed-reaction shock.

    "A dragon? Consorting with Naga? How?"

    "Quentin, who is apparently truly known as Dialga, claimed to her to be a god from another world," said Panne.

    Libra rubbed his chin. "So my worries about them causing a metaphysical disruption may be correct..."

    "No, this is preposterous!" said Virion. "This Dialga may very well be a false god!"

    "It's a possibility," said Panne. "He showed Naga strange technology I could not fathom."

    "Question is, whatever he and the others are, what are they doing here?" said Libra.

    "Should we report this to the others to find out?" said Panne.

    "If they are hostile, a public outing might incur their wrath," said Libra. "We should investigate on our own for now."

    Panne looked at Libra, then at Virion, resisting her urge to grit her teeth at the latter.

    "...Alright then. Let's see what's going on with the alleged 'Cincinnatians'."

    The three all left the room to go look. Unbeknownst to them, a small imp-like creature was looking out of a hoop-like portal from under the room's bed at them, and hurriedly ducked down and closed it to address a certain large, six-legged dragon.

    <They're onto us! Oh crap oh crap oh crap Giratina what are we going to do?>

    <Calm down, little fella, we can think of something...> said Giratina.

    <What? I doubt swaying them with burritos and a musical number will work this time!>

    <Maybe not,> said Giratina, <but straight-up throwing them off might.>

    Hoopa paused, then gave a mischievous smirk.

    <...Let's discuss. I feel I can provide some valuable suggestions for that kind of game.>

    --------

    Meanwhile, Palkia was standing by Robin's door as he poured over maps, pressing herself to the wall as she had an internal argument with herself.

    He's busy! Do you really want to interrupt him while he's busy?

    You Torchiced out every time he wasn't busy!

    Why are you so fixated on getting to know him anyway? It's not like you're in love with him or anything.

    Well, he's pretty cool in his game and even better in person and he helped me out of a traumatic situation, so yeah, It'd be great if I could be like, friends with someone I admire.

    Then go talk to him already!

    Well that doesn't mean I'm not nervous!

    Stop being nervous! You're a goddess, you can handle this.

    I don't wanna overdo it though...

    Just... Go in there and act natural!

    ...You know what? Okay, fine, challenge accepted, me, I'm fucking going in!


    Ever so slowly Palkia peeked her head around the door.

    "Er, hi, Robin?"

    Robin lifted his head up from his maps and gave a small smile. "Hello, Valentia. Do you need something?"

    "Uh, not really, I just wanted to talk."

    "About what?"

    Palkia paused. After what seemed like a million years of hesitation she leaned over Robin's maps.

    "Whatcha doin'?"

    You idiot! she told herself immediately after. That is not how you leave a good impression on him! He'll think you're hitting on him!

    Robin blinked, then turned back to his maps. "Tactical planning. It may be peaceful right now, but we've always got to be prepared."

    "Er, right," said Palkia.

    She looked over the maps and noticed one she recognised in particular, pointing to it.

    "These Valm guys sure seem like a bunch of troublemakers and time-wasters if you ask me!"

    Robin raised an eyebrow. "Valm? That continent has its own problems, I don't think they'll bring them to ours."

    Palkia opened her mouth to retort.

    Spoilers!

    She snapped her mouth back shut and started looking over the maps again.

    "Er, sorry about that. You seem pretty thoughtful. And organized."

    "Really?" said Robin? "I feel like this is a mess."

    Palkia shook her head. "No, I can tell you've put a lot of thought into it! I mean, you've got every nearby country laid out and what's going on where! That takes dedication."

    Robin smiled slightly. "Heh, thanks."

    There was a another pause that seemed like a million years for Palkia and about an hour for Robin before the latter finally spoke.

    "You seem kind of nervous, Valentina."

    Palkia gulped.

    Great, he knows I'm on guard! What do I do?!

    Just... Tell the partial truth? Without the fine details?

    That's suicide!

    Not as much as telling the whole truth. Just tell him how you feel!

    Okay, fine!


    Palkia took a deep breath before replying to Robin.

    "...Yes. Yes I am. Because you're this super-great tactician leading this super-great army and I'm just this washup from Cincinnati who admires you and wants to be your friend but feels like she can't."

    Robin stared a bit at Palkia, then smiled reassuringly.

    "You're one to talk about washups considering how I wound up with the Shepherds."

    Palkia blinked, then smiled and nodded. "Oh, right! They told me - lying unconscious in a field?"

    "Precisely. I've managed to do fine ever since. You've been doing fine, Valentina. And almost anyone who's with the Shepherds is a friend to me, including you."

    Palkia relaxed noticeably. "Thanks, Robin."

    "You're welcome, Valentina."

    Robin shrugged.

    "Besides, I'm not even the real leader. Chrom is."

    "Well, glad you're not trying to show off to the new girl at my expense," said a voice.

    The two jumped and yelped in surprise to see Chrom standing and smirking behind them.

    "How'd you get in here so quietly?!" said Robin.

    "You were both pretty distracted," said Chrom. "Anyway, Robin, I was wondering if we could both look over some swords we got from a shop."

    "Oh, if that's the case sure thing," said Robin.

    He then turned to Palkia. "Though... Is it alright if Valentina comes along?"

    Palkia froze in place before stammering out a reply. "M-Me?"

    Chrom blinked. "Well, as a valkyrie I'm not sure how much she would know about swords."

    "She could afford to learn," said Robin. "If you bought these from a shop so could any bandit with enough pilfered money, or an enemy nation for that matter. Yet if she's from an exotic nation she might not know what she's up against."

    Chrom rubbed his chin. "Well, when you put it that way, sure she can take a look. Valentina, I'll show you the ropes."

    "M-Me?" said Palkia. "But I-"

    She was interrupted by Chrom taking her hand and pulling her from her seat, and immediately after was standing next to Robin and Chrom as they led her down a side hallway.

    Fantastic, thought Pakia. I know nothing about how to take care of a sword, at least nothing I can remember. I was getting chill with Robin but now I'm not going to embarrass myself in front of not just any of his other friends but his best freind, what do I do what do I do what do I do

    Meanwhile, Chrom leaned in slightly and whispered to Robin.

    "Glad you finally found someone."

    Robin raised an eyebrow. "Um, no?"

    "Damn. She seems nice."

    "...Not like that."

    "Very well. Let's see if she can learn her swords."

    ----------

    In a particularly dingy room in the barracks, Chrom, Robin, and Palkia were looking over an assemblage of swords on a table. Palkia picked up one katana-shaped one.

    "I know this one! It's a Killing Edge, right?"

    "Yes, precisely!" said Robin.

    Palkia picked up a curved, odd-looking blade and swung it around a bit. "This one looks familiar too..."

    "That's a Wyrmslayer," said Chrom. "Particularly effective against any sort of dragon."

    Palkia started and quickly put the blade down, rubbing her hands together gingerly. "S-Sounds convenient! Heh, pesky dragons, eating thatched-roof cottages and burning cattle, who needs 'em, right?"

    After a long pause she looked over the assemblage of blades as a whole. "So... What are we looking for in particular?"

    "Defects, wear and tear, that kind of thing," said Robin.

    "Right... and how's this batch doing in that regard?" said Palkia.

    Chrom sighed. "Not very well. All of these blades are very dulled and past their prime."

    Palkia looked the blades over. "Huh, you're right."

    "These things only have so many uses before they break," said Robin, "but it seems we won't even be able to do that with these! Who bought them anyway?"

    A voice called from upstairs. "I got them at a discount! I needed to have money left for the really good sweets, Bubbles!"

    "Dammit," murmured Robin, "who picked Gaius to go weapon shopping again?"

    Chrom cast him an aside glance. "You did."

    Robin's eyes widened as he suddenly blushed profusely. "...Oh, right. I did."

    Palkia sighed and looked the swords over herself before an idea struck her and she stood up smiling smugly. "I may have just the trick, boys."

    Robin looked over to her. "Oh?"

    "You know how a lot of my spells can bend space, right?" said Palkia?

    "Yeah?" said Chrom.

    "Well, I know just the thing!"

    Palkia pulled a spellbook out of her bag and put her hand over the swords. Her hand, the book, and the swords all started glowing teal.

    "Now shrink them along the Z dimension just right..."

    The swords all began to change shape, growing thinner along their lengths as more of their material became stretched out. When they were done, Palkia gestured to them proudly.

    "Ta-da! Thinner swords, sharper swords - and they're still durable!"

    Chrom took one of the swords and sliced at the leg of a wooden chair with it. The chair was quickly felled by the blow, and Chrom turned to Palkia with a grin. "It worked!"

    Robin gazed in awe. "Palkia, you're a genius!"

    Palkia blinked. "I am?"

    "Yes!" said Robin. "In all my time studying magic I'd never have thought to use it to modify the properties of weapons on such a simple but effective level! It's brilliant, thank you!"

    Palkia gave a fangirlish giggle she quickly muffled before giving a nervous wave of her hand. "Eheh, it's nothing, glad you appreciate a good old Cincinnati spell!"

    Chrom looked between the two of them and crossed his arms, smiling. "I think after today we could all do something special."

    Palkia and Robin looked to him expectantly.

    "Oh?" they both said.

    -------

    At the top of the castle tower, Robin, Chrom, and Palkia stood as the sun set over the vast expanse of Ylisse before them.

    "This is your first time up here, isn't it, Valentina?" said Robin.

    "Yeah," said Palkia, "It's really nice..."

    "And I brought snacks," said Chrom.

    He produced several strips of jerky he passed among the three of them, which they all began munching eagerly. Palkia thought to herself as she chewed the jerky and gazed out at the landscape.

    Aaaaaaaaa I'm hanging out with Robin, and Chrom too! This is glorious!

    What'll you do next?

    Um, I dunno, hang out with them, or at least Robin, some more? I'm in the clear here, I don't wanna mess it up.

    You gotta be more defined than that.

    Hey, going on the fly worked this time, didn't it?

    Well, not always. Sometimes you gotta be prepared.

    What, and force it? Me and Robin have to do things naturally.

    Well we still have to account for-


    Palkia swallowed a hunk of jerky. "Will you two be quiet? I'm trying to enjoy this moment."

    Robin and Chrom stared at her akwardly. Palkia noticed and gave a nervous chuckle.

    "Oh, sorry, that was nothing. Just me talking to myself."

    ***

    As a side note, I was binging Phineas and Ferb as I wrote this and you can probably tell at certain points if you look. Next chapter is pretty important to the overarching story of this thing, so stay tuned for that.

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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  12. #12
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    Sep 2007
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    As promised, this a very special chapter. Enjoy

    Chapter 6: Destiny

    Robin and Palkia were wandering the barracks when Robin stiffened.

    "What's wrong?" Palkia said.

    "This part of the barracks. I don't recognize it. At all."

    Palkia shrugged. "Maybe they just built a new bit. I wouldn't worry too mu-"

    Suddenly two trap doors opened beneath them and they fell screaming into darkness.

    -------

    The two came to in what seemed like a sunny Yillisean field, though one neither of them seemed to recognise.

    "Okay," said Palkia. "What wise guy knocked us out and dragged us out here?"

    "I don't know, but we should get back," said Robin.

    He attempted to get to his feet, only to drag a protesting Palkia up with him. Confused, Robin looked to their hands and his eyes widened with shock.

    "Why are we holding hands? And more importantly why are our hands stuck together?!"

    Palkia yelped and tried to pry her hand from Robin's, but it was very much stuck fast. "Not good, not good, not good..."

    “IT SEEMS YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR DESTINATION," said a distorted voice.

    "Definitely not good!" said Palkia.

    "THIS SEEMS TO BE A PATH WHERE LOVERS WHO MEET THEIR DESTINED PARTNERS DISCUSS THEIR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER.”

    "Destined lovers?!" said Robin.

    "No, this isn't possible..." said Palkia. "I can't get married to a mor-!"

    She caught herself and stayed quiet.

    “WHAT COULD BE WAITING UP AHEAD? YOU ARE FREE TO STEP FORTH HAND-IN-HAND, CURIOSITY AND FEAR IN YOUR HEARTS, OR YOU CAN REFRAIN.”

    Palkia gulped. "We'll refrain, thank you very mu-"

    “NOW, STEP FORTH!”

    The voice fell silent. It was then the two noticed heart-shaped arches up ahead.

    "I'd suspect one of our enemies is behind this save for the fact none of them would do anything like this," said Robin.

    "I swear I would fight whatever that creepy voice is!" said Palkia. "If only I could see what the hell it is."

    "Unfortunately," said Robin, "we are literally stuck to each other, so the only way to get to it is heading on together."

    "Alright then," said Palkia. "Once we get there I'm beating up whoever's behind this!"

    The two headed onward into the heart-shaped arches.

    ------

    As they went on, Robin craned his neck to squint at something up ahead. "Is that-"

    “SUDDENLY, ALL IN ATTENDANCE HEAR AN ANNOUNCEMENT,” said the voice, booming around them.

    "Could you turn down the volume?!" said Palkia.

    “UP AHEAD, THEY SEE A BRIDE AND GROOM’S JOYOUS COMMEMORATIVE PAINTING OF LOVE. THEY CONFER BETWEEN THEM WHETHER TO LOOK AT IT, OR IGNORE IT.”

    "I doubt ignoring is an option" said Palkia. "So unfortunately we're going to have to look."

    She and Robin hesitantly crept over, only for both of them to stop dead in horror upon seeing what the painting depicted.

    "What." said Robin. "I just... why?!"

    "It's me in a wedding dress! And you in a tux! Holding me!" said Palkia.

    "What even is this tux thing and why do I get the creepy feeling it's supposed to be romantic?!" said Robin.

    "Just the fact that someone would bother to make this is itself really creeping me ou-" Palkia started to say.

    She then whipped her head over to Robin in shock. "Why are you in the tux from the photo?!"

    Robin looked down at himself, yelped, and then looked in equal shock at Palkia. "I don't know, but why are you in the dress from the photo?!"

    Palkia looked down at herself to find she was indeed in a wedding dress. She let out a high-pitched yelp, then stomped her foot in anger.

    "That is it! We are getting to the bottom of this!"

    She dragged Robin off through the heart-shaped archways.

    -------

    After a while, the two came up to a building of the sort both recognised from their respective worlds.

    "Is that a... church?" said Robin.

    "I need answers!" said Palkia.

    "THE LONG-AWAITED MOMENT HAS COME," said the distorted voice. "THE BRIDE AND GROOM ARE FINALLY ABOUT TO ENTER.”

    "I still don't hear any answers!" said Palkia.

    “THE LAST MOMENT OF HESITATION HAS ARRIVED BEFORE YOU ARE TO BE WED.”

    "We are not getting married!" said Robin.

    “THROUGH YOUR OWN FREE WILL, YOU DECIDE TO VOW ETERNAL LOVE TO EACH OTHER.”

    "This is a violation of free will!" said Robin.

    “NOW, OPEN THE DOOR TOGETHER!”

    "You know what? Fine!" said Palkia.

    "You are going down!" said Robin.

    The two worked together to kick down the church doors, only to find the church completely empty, altar, seats, and all. Despite this the voice boomed out yet again.

    “YOU MUST VOW YOUR UNWAVERING LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER, IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH. NOW, VOW YOUR LOVE!”

    "I can't get married to him! I feel like a... a... An OC being paired off with a canon character!" said Palkia.

    "A... what?" said Robin.

    "It's a Cincinnati metaphor you wouldn't understa-"

    "No! I won't allow this!" said another voice.

    A woman in tight-fitting dark mage gear burst through the doors, rushing over to Robin.

    "Tharja?" said Robin, blinking.

    "I could not let these foul pranksters pair you off to this Valentina!" said Tharja.

    Palkia put her hands on her hips. "Waitaminute, pranksters?"

    It was then Giratina and Hoopa emerged from behind the altar, laughing uproariously.

    "Dudes, you should have seen the looks on your faces!" said Giratina.

    "Oh man, this was so worth all the setup," said Hoopa.

    The two stopped, however, to see that Palkia had gotten her hand unstuck and was standing before them with a crazed grin on her face.

    "I promised whoever was behind this I'd kick their ass... And I keep my promises..."

    Giratina and Hoopa screamed as Palkia chased them out of the church.

    Tharja thumbed after them and gave a baffled look at Robin.

    Robin just shrugged.

    ***
    Happy April Fools, everybody! The real Chapter 6 should be up soon!

    By the way, yes, I have used this Persona Q sequence in a fic before...

    Alain finds out exactly what people think of him far worse than the hard way, and only one thing can save him.
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