Quote Originally Posted by RealRaymon View Post
The 36th Chapter: Aqua battle! Piplup vs Empoleon!
Yeah let's get it going!

(Gyarados starts spinning in the water and creates a Whirlpool. Whirlpool starts getting larger and larger, and eventually traps Squirtle. Squirtle gets inside the Whirlpool and takes damage.)
This reminded me of the episode where the S.S. Anne goes all Titanic Style with all the Gyarados attacking the group Memories xD

Gyarados: "Tshaa!" (Orange beam appears in the front of Gyarados' mouth.)
There should be "an" before Orange Beam

Ash: "We won!"
I feel like Gyarados went down a bit too easily, but it really shows Squirtle's power so it's good

Piplup: "Pilpup!" (Starts creating a Whirlpool. Then it throws it into the water, and whirlpool becomes huge, trapping and damaging Empoleon at the same time.)
Bolded the mistake


This chapter was really good Both battles were epic, and the strategies you came up with were really good And also, there weer basically no grammar mistakes so good job for that