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    Default Mischief (One-Shot. Rated G)

    Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon (unfortunately). Rated G.

    Mischief

    The Kanto sunset cast the autumn sky in orange and purple hues as another excruciatingly long day at Lavender Radio Tower came to an end. If they lost any more profits from cleaning up these accidents, the director thought, the board would be clamoring for his head. He couldn’t blame them, of course, with the economy in the state it was.

    Another employee had tripped on a mop the janitor was certain he’d put away. Unlike the incident a week ago involving her coworker, this employee had managed to avoid any broken bones – the mop wasn’t near the stairs this time – but she gave the director her two weeks' notice an hour later. The elevator became stuck between floors for the third time that month about two hours after that, despite having been declared to be in perfect order by the last seven repairmen to have inspected it.

    The director locked the door behind him and shook his pounding head. He could not shake the feeling that he was being watched, his overtaxed mind convinced the board was making a record of his slightest mistake to justify blaming him for the continued problems.

    ***

    “I can feel the pressure mounting!” the spiky one howled excitedly. “It won’t be long until those humans leave our home forever!”

    “Are you sure?” asked the round one, its voice a mix of hope and skepticism.

    “I can taste it!” said Spiky. “I sensed how despondent that human felt when it left.” It pressed the back of a disembodied hand against its forehead in mock distress.

    “I’m not sure. It’s taking too long. We’ve been at this since we were expelled and they haven’t budged once.” The way the round one’s voice hung in the air suggested it had something else to add.

    “What is it?” asked Spiky.

    “I think we should step up our efforts. If the humans are already on the brink, then one big push might be enough to break them for good. Smaller efforts might build their resistance.”

    “Got something in mind?”

    Round was silent for a moment, floating up and down as it considered the best way to explain its idea.

    “The humans are feeding something in our home for some reason. You’ve noticed that, right?”

    “Yeah, with electricity,” said the spiky one.

    “Well, remember when we cut off the feeding lines a while back and everything went dark inside? That seemed to annoy all the humans there rather than the one or two at a time we’ve messed with through other means.”

    “I see. But they got it working again not long after,” Spiky pointed out.

    Round rolled up and down in the air to indicate agreement. “But we only attacked the food lines. If we find where the food is coming from, we can attack that and starve out whatever the humans are feeding in our home.” Spiky raised an eyebrow, suddenly attentive.

    “You know how to get to the source?”

    “Maybe,” said Round. “No, yes. I mean, yes, I know how to track it.”

    Spiky grinned widely and howled to summon the others. Dark blackish purple forms rose through the ground to surround the pair, eyes glowing, mouths grinning. They were going to strike at the humans in force tonight.

    ***

    Round’s plan was a solid one. They simply needed to follow the food lines back to where the electricity seemed the strongest. A number of other lines branched out as they traveled – apparently the humans were feeding a number of different things in other places – but Spiky trusted Round’s sense of direction to lead them to the right spot. It was always more sensitive to the fluctuations in the electricity than Spiky.

    The group, which consisted of both round and spiky dark purple creatures, passed under the large mountain and crossed a river before arriving at a squat building that hummed with electricity. The place could have put a zapdos to shame, Spiky mused. A scout passed through the thick walls to discover a large metal creature humming in the middle of a brightly lit room. The only humans around were caught up in observing blinking lights around the humming behemoth, and they were few in number.

    After the scout – a smaller round one with an unusual bluish tinge to its smoke – recounted its findings to the others, Spiky and Round immediately got to work on a plan of attack.

    “We’ll knock the humans out first, since the beast feeding everything seems to be asleep,” started Round.

    “And then we’ll put that sorry hunk of metal on trial for its crimes.” Spiky rubbed its hands together.

    “And then we’ll have our home back!” cried a number of voices in the crowd.

    “Sssh! We don’t want to give ourselves away,” hissed Round.

    ***

    Within moments the small army of purple gas descended upon the humans, the round creatures surrounding each human’s head with their bodies at the same moment to ensure none could warn the others. They released their victims as soon as they stopped struggling – their target was much bigger and wasting energy suffocating the humans any longer than needed to incapacitate them might lead to a lack of power against their true opponent. Had their numbers been larger, they might have tried this tactic directly against their home’s invaders, but alas, this was the best they could manage for now.

    The metal beast still hummed, unperturbed by the attack on its human servants. Other than its constant vibrating, it was motionless. Round paused.

    “Do you suppose it’s asleep?” it asked its evolved ally.

    Spiky reached out its right hand as far as it dared to prod the giant. It withdrew the detached limb immediately as electricity leapt from the monster’s form to its finger. Wincing from the shock, Spiky rubbed its numb right hand with its unharmed left.

    “Well,” said Spiky after a moment, “it didn’t really register my presence. I think it’s resting. It just has natural defenses. Like that mareep I tried to eat a few nights ago that zapped me in its sleep so I had to find something else to eat. Shame. It looked tasty. Not so much with this thing, though. Metal things are hard to digest.” Spiky looked up from its injured hand to notice that Round had stopped paying attention around the time it learned that their foe was still unaware of their presence and was already formulating a method of getting around the static it emitted.

    “The humans seemed to be keeping it happy with those blinking markers on the walls, so let’s meddle with those.” Round ignored Spiky’s scowl. Well, at least one of them thought contemplating whether this creature was edible was a worthy pursuit.

    Round, in the loudest voice it could manage, called the others to attention. One of the more bored ones sheepishly returned to the crowd after Spiky’s glare convinced it to drop its plans of practicing possessing one of the unconscious humans.

    “Tonight,” said Spiky after Round finished giving instructions, “we teach this creature to stop feeding whatever those humans are feeding in our home and come morning those usurpers will have no choice but to leave!”

    A cheer rose from the purple hoard and they quickly dispersed to their assigned duties. They slipped into the blinking displays on the walls and released pulses of gas and darkness and ghostly energies to disrupt the flow of whatever the humans used to please the giant sleeper in the middle. They poked and prodded the raised buttons and flipped the positions of switches. They attempted to cast confusing and hypnotic rays at the beast itself to ensure it would remain dormant, but were unable to tell whether these actions had any effect or if their metal opponent would have just slumbered through it regardless.

    The beast in the middle soon rumbled and groaned. Small fires erupted from the wall panels to be extinguished by odd foam that sprayed out from some automatic human device. The humans began to stir one after another, only to have the round ghosts reapply hypnosis to each in turn. The battle continued on, the spiky ones’ shadowy claws and energy balls striking the beast itself now. The army fought the beast well into the night.

    ***

    Dawn was nearing. They were exhausted from their work, a few of their number suffering from electric discharge, but their foe was silent and the building dark. To Spiky’s surprise, it was Round who began laughing first – an almost silent chuckle which grew rapidly into a wild cackle. A chorus of similar sounds erupted from the others until they were too tired to continue, and then one at a time they followed the path they came from back to their home. No matter how far they went, they would always be able to feel their tower’s pulse guiding them back. That feeling, that somehow cold warmth that tickled from inside out, was why they had done this tonight and why they knew they would return home triumphant in the end.

    Round and Spiky were the last to leave.

    “So, you suppose it tastes any good under the metal shell?” Spiky wondered aloud.

    “Nah,” said Round. “I looked inside it after we stilled it and the defenses wore down. It’s weird – it’s like there’s nothing alive in it at all other than the pulses it released before we defeated it.”

    “These humans work with some bizarre company indeed,” said Spiky. It rested its hands behind its head while it tried to puzzle out just what the beast was. After a few moments it became bored of that and began prodding one of the unconscious humans instead.

    “Hey, stop that,” said Round. “There’s only the two of us now. There’d be trouble if you woke them up.”

    “All right,” Spiky agreed, although it sort of liked the sound of the word trouble. It had a nice ring to it. “Let’s go home.”

    ***

    “So the security system is bye-bye a go-go?” a man in a black uniform mused aloud. He stood on a flat rock overlooking the Kanto Power Plant. After awakening to find the plant had been vandalized, the manager and employees had worked night and day to restore electricity to most of the region. Their own security alarms and cameras – many of which seemed to have exploded from the inside – were a lower priority in comparison to pokémon centers, hospitals, and the still disabled transportation system, and that was just the opportunity the man needed.

    “Lucky the day is for me.” He smiled. Yes, he would be able to cripple the plant alone. If vandals had been able to cause as much trouble for the region as they had, surely a Rocket could repeat the process to even greater ends. He would impress the executives in Johto and Team Rocket would be feared once more.

        Spoiler:- Author’s Notes:
    Last edited by Ememew; 28th October 2012 at 9:54 PM.
    Oh, look! I wrote a fanfic! Weak (One-Shot. Rated G). Can Iris convince Bianca that she can't just avoid her problems?

    And another one: Mischief (One-Shot. Rated G). A little fun for October.

  2. #2
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    This is a nice little oneshot for Halloween. The idea of a small army of Gastly and Haunter leading an attack on a power plant (I laughed at their interpretation of a generator) to free their home is really original. I loved the way you portrayed all of them; just about every one in the group that was mentioned had a clear personality of their own. I loved the interactions between Round and Spiky in particular; Round's thoughtful, cautious nature complimented the free-wheeling, charismatic nature of Spiky very well. Showing the thoughts of the unfortunate human director and the ambitious Rocket grunt was a nice touch as well. Your characterization really added to this story, and it made me feel very sad that the plan of the ghost Pokemon only succeeded on a temporary basis.

    I also liked the fact that you subverted the idea of ghost Pokemon on Halloween always being a horror fic. This was anything but horror, and I really liked that; it's something that you don't see on a regular basis, which added to the originality.

    Your story is very well written. I couldn't pick up any grammatical faults on my first or second read (yes, I read it twice; it was that good), so you did an outstanding job on that. The story itself was easy to read; there wasn't anything that was jarring or looked odd or otherwise detracted from the experience, so you did an excellent job on that as well.

    So, overall, I loved the premise, originality, characterization, and writing style of this oneshot. I'm definitely sold on your story. Sorry for not being able to find faults, but I hope that this review will make up for it.

    Sincerely,

    Mem.
    COMING SOON

    Warmonger - A fantasy fic where peasants fight the wars of kings and lords, where monsters lurk in the night, and where depravity is not only expected, but encouraged...

  3. #3
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    SilentMemento said it best. I was laughing for ages at that little reference to G/S/C. The description was superb, as was characterisation. The only thing that bothered me was the lack of capitals for Zapdos, but that was a very, VERY, minor thing. Otherwise, a perfect Halloween read.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ememew View Post
    The Kanto sunset cast the autumn sky in orange and purple hues as another excruciatingly long day at Lavender Radio Tower came to an end. If they lost any more profits from cleaning up these accidents, the director thought, the board would be clamoring for his head. He couldn’t blame them, of course, with the economy in the state it was.

    Another employee had tripped on a mop the janitor was certain he’d put away. Unlike the incident a week ago involving her coworker this employee had managed to avoid any broken bones – the mop wasn’t near the stairs this time – but she gave the director her two week’s notice an hour later. The elevator became stuck between floors for the third time that month about two hours after that, despite having been declared to be in perfect order by the last seven repairmen to have inspected it.
    Uh-oh. Whacky incidents? In Lavendar Town? I see where this might be going! Two slight things: There should be a comma after "unlike the incident a week ago involving her coworker" since it's a long opening clause. And since weeks is multiple, it should be " two weeks' notice ".

    “What is it?” asked Spiky.

    “I think we should step up our efforts. If the humans are already on the brink, then one big push might be enough to break them for good. Smaller efforts might build their resistance.”

    “Got something in mind?”

    Round was silent for a moment, floating up and down as it considered the best way to explain its idea.
    "Round" and "Spiky". I like that.

    “Well,” said Spiky after a moment, “it didn’t really register my presence. I think it’s resting. It just has natural defenses. Like that mareep I tried to eat a few nights ago that zapped me in its sleep so I had to find something else to eat. Shame. It looked tasty.
    I think the description of going after the Mareep might go on a bit too far here. As of "Like that Mareep I tried to eat a few nights ago" I already had a perfect picture of what happened. The bits after that about it zapping Spiky and his having to eat something else and its looking tasty...that all felt a bit over-embellished to me.

    Round, in the loudest voice it could manage, called the others to attention. One of the more bored ones sheepishly returned to the crowd after Spiky’s glare convinced it to drop its plans of practicing possessing one of the unconscious humans.
    I had forgotten all about that! That was a knack of the ghosts in Gen 1, wasn't it? Good reference!

    They attempted to cast confusing and hypnotic rays at the beast itself to ensure it would remain dormant, but were unable to tell whether these actions had any effect or if their metal opponent would have just slumbered through it regardless.
    I like this line and this visual. Not sure what about it I like, but I do. It's entertaining.

    No matter how far they went, they would always be able to feel their tower’s pulse guiding them back. That feeling, that somehow cold warmth that tickled from inside out, was why they had done this tonight and why they knew they would return home triumphant in the end.
    That's SUCH a good tease. Why ARE they all drawn to the radio tower? I mean, I know it used to be the memorial tower, but why are they drawn to it? Is there definitive proof that ghost types are souls of dead pokemon? Is it something else? That could be its own story entirely, and this little bit here really evokes a world of possibilities.

    “So the security system is bye-bye a go-go?” a man in a black uniform mused aloud. He stood on a flat rock overlooking the Kanto Power Plant. After awakening to find the plant had been vandalized, the manager and employees had worked night and day to restore electricity to most of the region. Their own security alarms and cameras – many of which seemed to have exploded from the inside – were a lower priority in comparison to pokémon centers, hospitals, and the still disabled transportation system, and that was just the opportunity the man needed.
    Okay, I love that you tied this whole sub-story from G/S/C together. My only problem is...has the Rocket Grunt been spying on the power plant this whole time? Otherwise, how does he know that the manager woke up to find vandalization and that his crew worked day and night to repair everything except the security system? It seems like there is a narration shift in there or something. Or I'm, at least, not getting enough of a story on what he is doing there and why. This part feels incomplete in that regard.


    --

    I don't know if this is just a happy accident or it was your intent, but this was a nifty little story for Halloween-time. I guess it's been up for several days now, and I'm just getting to it, but still! October.

    I was surprised to see the Gastly and Haunter being portrayed as fairly malicious (back to possessing people, eating living creatures, breaking peoples' bones) and not just mischievous and fun-loving. I'm just used to the cartoon portrayal of them, I guess.

    It was a fun story, and glad to see you worked on getting another quality, fun one-shot out! The Gastly and Haunter were exceptionally fun to read, and I think everything was just really well-done. The description of the power plant and the generator was a blast to read, too.
    Last edited by Sid87; 25th October 2012 at 1:26 PM.


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  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilentMemento View Post
    This is a nice little oneshot for Halloween. The idea of a small army of Gastly and Haunter leading an attack on a power plant (I laughed at their interpretation of a generator) to free their home is really original. I loved the way you portrayed all of them; just about every one in the group that was mentioned had a clear personality of their own. I loved the interactions between Round and Spiky in particular; Round's thoughtful, cautious nature complimented the free-wheeling, charismatic nature of Spiky very well. Showing the thoughts of the unfortunate human director and the ambitious Rocket grunt was a nice touch as well. Your characterization really added to this story, and it made me feel very sad that the plan of the ghost Pokemon only succeeded on a temporary basis.

    I also liked the fact that you subverted the idea of ghost Pokemon on Halloween always being a horror fic. This was anything but horror, and I really liked that; it's something that you don't see on a regular basis, which added to the originality.

    Your story is very well written. I couldn't pick up any grammatical faults on my first or second read (yes, I read it twice; it was that good), so you did an outstanding job on that. The story itself was easy to read; there wasn't anything that was jarring or looked odd or otherwise detracted from the experience, so you did an excellent job on that as well.

    So, overall, I loved the premise, originality, characterization, and writing style of this oneshot. I'm definitely sold on your story. Sorry for not being able to find faults, but I hope that this review will make up for it.

    Sincerely,

    Mem.
    Glad you liked it! I really had a lot of fun writing Spiky and Round's interactions. Thanks for reading, and don't worry about not catching a lot of mistakes (I hope that just means I did a good job proofreading).
    Quote Originally Posted by SonicSceptile View Post
    SilentMemento said it best. I was laughing for ages at that little reference to G/S/C. The description was superb, as was characterisation. The only thing that bothered me was the lack of capitals for Zapdos, but that was a very, VERY, minor thing. Otherwise, a perfect Halloween read.
    Zapdos lacks capitals because it refers to just any zapdos rather than a specific individual. I did wonder if I should go with capitals because it's a legendary, but decided not to because I see most legendary Pokemon as just really, really rare rather than as one-of-a-kind creatures (in this fic anyway). Zapdos seems like it would fall into the really, really rare category to me, so "a zapdos" makes sense to me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sid87 View Post
    Uh-oh. Whacky incidents? In Lavendar Town? I see where this might be going! Two slight things: There should be a comma after "unlike the incident a week ago involving her coworker" since it's a long opening clause. And since weeks is multiple, it should be " two weeks' notice ".
    Ack, how did I miss "weeks'"? Thanks. Commas have never been my strong suit.
    "Round" and "Spiky". I like that.
    I couldn't come up with really good ghostly names for them as individuals for this, so I decided to try what you did with Sideburns. It also figured it would help make them seem less "human" if they didn't use names. Glad it actually worked.
    I think the description of going after the Mareep might go on a bit too far here. As of "Like that Mareep I tried to eat a few nights ago" I already had a perfect picture of what happened. The bits after that about it zapping Spiky and his having to eat something else and its looking tasty...that all felt a bit over-embellished to me.
    That was intentional, actually. I see Spiky as the type to go on and on long after others stop paying attention once it gets started. I (thought I) indicated that through Round ignoring Spiky partway through, but maybe I need to clarify it a bit more?
    That's SUCH a good tease. Why ARE they all drawn to the radio tower? I mean, I know it used to be the memorial tower, but why are they drawn to it? Is there definitive proof that ghost types are souls of dead pokemon? Is it something else? That could be its own story entirely, and this little bit here really evokes a world of possibilities.
    I figured it would be a nice touch to make their connection to the tower a little more paranormal in nature since they're Ghosts and all. What it is about the tower that connects them to it, I'll leave to the imagination. I have an idea or two, but that might wait for a different story.
    Okay, I love that you tied this whole sub-story from G/S/C together. My only problem is...has the Rocket Grunt been spying on the power plant this whole time? Otherwise, how does he know that the manager woke up to find vandalization and that his crew worked day and night to repair everything except the security system? It seems like there is a narration shift in there or something. Or I'm, at least, not getting enough of a story on what he is doing there and why. This part feels incomplete in that regard.
    Hmm . . . the idea when I wrote it was that the Rocket grunt overheard a worker muttering about it as they were leaving - something along the lines of "grumble-why-can't-we-get-the-security-back-up-first-so-this-doesn't-happen-again-grumble" - hence him calling it his lucky day (the way the foreign grunt talks, anyway). It happened off-screen, though. I didn't include it because I was afraid it would be a little info-dumpy. I'll think about how to work it in.
    I don't know if this is just a happy accident or it was your intent, but this was a nifty little story for Halloween-time. I guess it's been up for several days now, and I'm just getting to it, but still! October.
    Both? I wrote this back in late September with no intention of it being a Halloween story at the time I wrote it, then realized how soon October was. Since it was about Ghost-types, I decided to sit on it for about a month to release it closer to Halloween.
    I was surprised to see the Gastly and Haunter being portrayed as fairly malicious (back to possessing people, eating living creatures, breaking peoples' bones) and not just mischievous and fun-loving. I'm just used to the cartoon portrayal of them, I guess.
    You saw them as malicious, huh? I can see that. The idea is that it's sort of a grey area as they want their home back. Whether the means to the end are reasonable or not comes from whether you're a ghost or one of the humans impacted by the tripping hazards by stairs, vast power-outages, etc. But yeah, they certainly cause a lot of grief to people all around, don't they? Even beyond the Radio Tower. I also drew on some of their darker Dex entries for their eating habits.
    It was a fun story, and glad to see you worked on getting another quality, fun one-shot out! The Gastly and Haunter were exceptionally fun to read, and I think everything was just really well-done. The description of the power plant and the generator was a blast to read, too.
    Glad to see another person enjoyed my story.
    Last edited by Ememew; 2nd December 2012 at 6:55 PM.
    Oh, look! I wrote a fanfic! Weak (One-Shot. Rated G). Can Iris convince Bianca that she can't just avoid her problems?

    And another one: Mischief (One-Shot. Rated G). A little fun for October.

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