A fun exercise for ALL THE FIC WRITERS!

[moonlightning]

I recently stumbled across a website called Giznoogle.net. All you do is paste the URL of your fic (or any web page) into the search bar and you're done.

WARNING: Offensive language may(will) be added.

It certainly makes you feel a lot better about your writing. I seriously suggest giving it a try, just for some fun.

Oh and because this thread is verging on pointlessness: COMPARE AND CONTRAST AND DISCUSS AND ETC etc etc etc.

Please post some of the funnier quotes you've found, before and afters would be best.

[Gothitelle K]

yo that was awesome lol

Ariana opened her eyes n' stared all up in tha blank wall fo' a gangbangin' few seconds. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Biatch was on her side, wit one arm around Mars yo. Her playa was curled up on her side, chillin soundly while her purugly was on tha edge of tha bed, curled up on her side fo' realz. Ariana rubbed her eyes as her *** slowly started ta sit up on tha edge of her bedside.

“Because, tha Driftveil Market opens at dat time n' Chrizzle hustlin is goin ta be crazy,” Mars explained. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! “After that, our crazy-*** asses need ta start cookin mutha****in right away since Saturn gets up around seven thirty. Now, as I holla'd, please wake mah crazy *** up at dat time. Yo *** is comin wit mah crazy *** so you need ta git dressed at dat time as well. Remember… five o’ clock.”

Da biatch reached fo' her phone dat was restin on tha nightstand as her *** was tryin ta think. What was her *** supposed ta do when her *** woke up, biatch? Biatch looked at her phone while gettin back tha **** into bed. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! However her *** propped her pillows ta where her *** could comfortably sit up straight yo. Her jigsaw game was brought up on tha screen n' ****in started ta play it fo' a lil while.

“I’m mixin gin n juice wit some leftover salac berries,” Ariana started ta say as her *** turned ta her water. “I wanted a soda yo, but it was snatched from mah crazy *** by a cold-*** lil wack force of nature dat called mah crazy *** fat. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. So I decided on a ill berry flavored gin n juice drink. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Since yo *** is rockin tha kasib berries fo' whatever you was bustin fo' Saturn, I’m rockin these salac berries. Which makes mah crazy *** wonder, where tha heck do you find these?”

[JX Valentine]

And somehow, every one of [REDACTED]'s parts in The Leaf Green Incident make even more sense.

Examples:

Before
So there we were. Plain concrete room, as per standard. Dr. Sage – y'know, the researcher in charge of the files on 004 – Agent [REDACTED], me, and the girl. And the girl looks at me with those big eyes, and I don't blame her for looking at me the way she did because I'm holding the standard-issue plasma cannon, just in case. I'd soil myself too if I saw someone standing in the corner of any room I'm in with that big of a gun.

After
So there our crazy-*** asses were. Plain concrete room, as per standard. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Dr. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Sage – y'know, tha researcher up in charge of tha filez on 004 – Agent [REDACTED], me, n' tha girl. And tha ho looks at mah crazy *** wit em big-*** eyes, n' I don't blame her fo' lookin at mah crazy *** tha way her *** did cuz I be holdin tha standard-issue plazzlea cannon, just up in case. I'd soil mah dirty *** too if I saw some mutha****a standin up in tha corner of any room I be up in wit dat big-asz of a gun.


Before
What kind of *** hole hippie parents name their kid Leaf? Answer me that one.

After
What kind of *** hole hippie muthafathas name they kid Leaf, biatch? Answer mah crazy *** dat one.


Before
So the people there didn't have a chance to get away because the majority of the island was covered in mud and ash or whatever within minutes, and only a handful of Pompeiians went, "Oh ****, there's a lava flow coming."

After
So tha gangstas there didn't gots a cold-*** lil chizzle ta git away cuz tha majoritizzle of tha island was covered up in mud n' ash and whatever within minutes, n' only a handful of Pompeiians went, "Oh ****, therez a lava flow coming."


Before
She had a brother. You ever heard of Red? The League crowned him champion when we rearranged everyone's memories to make people forget about Leaf.

After
Biatch had a funky-*** brutha. Yo *** eva heard of Red, biatch? Da League crowned his *** champion when our crazy-*** asses rearranged everyonez memories ta make gangstas forget bout Leaf.


Before
Not really, but I figured you wouldn't process this properly if I didn't sound professional for five seconds. Either that, or you'll reanimate my corpse because I'm still technically part of the organization. I know some of the other SE's can do that ****, and let me tell you right now that I will go George Romero on your *** if you try it.

After
Not straight-up yo, but I figured you wouldn't process dis properly if I didn't sound professionizzle fo' five seconds. Either that, and yo dirty *** is gonna reanimate mah corpse cuz I be still technologically part of tha organization. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I know a shitload of tha other SEz can do dat ****, n' let mah crazy *** rap mutha****in right now dat I will go George Romero on yo' *** if you try dat ****.


Clearly, this is exactly how I should've written them to begin with.

Also, for anyone interested in the hilarity, a link!

[Kutie Pie]

Oh my goodness, this is the greatest thing ever.

I have no idea if I should be putting this all into spoilers because of the language, but this is too flippin' funny. I'm obviously picking out random things that I'm just giggling like mad over, so here's a few for now.

Anyway, for starters, the church hymn included prior to the first chapter of Forsaken:

Church hymn BEFORE:

"Master, with anguish of spirit I bow in my grief today

The depths of my sad heart are troubled. Oh, waken and save, I pray!

Torrents of sin and of anguish Sweep o`er my sinking soul,

And I perish! I perish! dear Master. Oh, hasten and take control!"

Church hymn AFTER:

"Master, wit anguish of spirit I bow up in mah grief todizzle

Da depthz of mah f*cked up heart is sh*td. Y'all KNOW dat sh*t, muthaf*cka! Oh, waken n' save, I pray!

Torrentz of sin n' of anguish Sweep o`er mah sinkin soul,

And I perish, muthaf*cka! I perish, muthaf*cka! dear Master. Oh, hasten n' take control!"

*~*~*

First line from Forsaken chapter one:

BEFORE: "WHAT! A world war?!"

AFTER: "WHAT, muthaf*cka! A ghetto war?!"

*~*~*

BEFORE: As though he had read his mind, Mewtwo serenely expressed, "When I went to fetch her, she had grown too weak to transport herself. She was lying in the Tree, awaiting death I assume."

AFTER: As though he had read his crazy-ass mind, Mewtwo serenely expressed, "When I went ta fetch her, her ass had grown too weak ta transhiznit her muthaf*ckin ass. Right back up in yo muthaf*ckin ass. Biatch was lyin up in tha Tree, awaitin dirtnap I assume."

*~*~*

BEFORE: "And we're awfully sorry for what has happened," the Gratitude Legendary acknowledged, bowing her head slightly.

AFTER: "And we're awfully sorry fo' what tha f*ck has happened," tha Gratitude Legendary bigged up, bowin her head slightly.

*~*~*

BEFORE: "Deoxys, thousands of people and Pokémon died because of this!" Cresselia blurted out, feeling ready to go into hysterics. The crescents on her back gave a weak glimmer in the light as she leaned past a startled Darkrai for a better look. "This is why they're going to war! It's a catastrophe!"

"Oh, come on! If we were to be bombed right now and only a few of us died, would the world go into a world war just because of that?"

"Oh, most definitely! We're important! So why not?"

AFTER: "Deoxys, thousandz of gangstas and Pokémon took a dirt nap cuz of this!" Cresselia blurted out, feelin locked n loaded ta go tha f*ck into hysterics. Da crescents on her back gave a weak glimmer up in tha light as her ass leaned past a startled Darkrai fo' a funky-ass mo' betta look. "This is why they be goin ta war, muthaf*cka! It aint nuthin but a cold-ass lil catastrophe!"

"Oh, come on, muthaf*cka! If our crazy-ass asses was ta be bombed muthaf*ckin right now n' only a gangbangin' few of our asses died, would tha ghetto go tha f*ck into a ghetto war just cuz of that?"

"Oh, most definitely, muthaf*cka! We're blingin, muthaf*cka! So why not?"

*~*~*

From chapter nine:

BEFORE: A hiss expelled before he formed his words. "Mew, you are making a big mistake."

She just laughed, a little harsh for someone of her size. "You need to explain why, there are quite a few other 'mistakes' I could be making."

AFTER: A hiss expelled before he formed his f*ckin lyrics. "Mew, yo ass is bustin a funky-ass big-ass mistake."

Guess what, muthaf*cka! Biatch just laughed, a lil harsh fo' some muthaf*cka of her size. "Yo ass need ta explain why, there is like a gangbangin' few other 'mistakes' I could be bustin."

*~*~*

From chapter fourteen (keep in mind this is a little girl's dialogue):

BEFORE: "Mew, I told you you're not dead."

AFTER: "Mew, I busted some lyrics ta you yo ass is not dead as f*ckin fried chicken."

*~*~*

From the summary of Mag Mell:

BEFORE: As Ralph continues to accept his role as a villain and his changed life, he can't seem to fight back that sense of loneliness he's grown to live with. A new character introduced to the arcade may help close that gap—that is, if he can get over her quirkiness.

AFTER: As Ralph continues ta accept his bangin role as a villain n' his chizzled life, he can't seem ta fight back dat sense of lonelinizz he be straight grown ta live wit fo' realz. A freshly smoked up character introduced ta tha arcade may help close dat gap: "that is, if he can git over her quirkiness.

*~*~*

From Mag Mell chapter two:

BEFORE: He waved her off. "How in the world do you fall asleep for thirty minutes straight and not get woken up by other passengers?"

"Doesn't help the lights as they swoosh on by is hypnotic," she resumed as though she didn't hear his question. "I remember my eyes drooping as I tried to concentrate on them, and I guess I blacked out."

"You didn't catch a word I said," Ralph noted matter-of-factly.

AFTER: Dude waved her off. "How tha f*ck up in tha ghetto do you fall asleep fo' thirty minutes straight n' not git woken up by other passengers?"

"Doesn't help tha lights as they swoosh on by is hypnotic," her ass resumed as though her ass didn't hear his question. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "I remember mah eyes droopin as I tried ta concentrate on them, n' I guess I blacked out."

"Yo ass didn't catch a word I holla'd," Ralph noted matter-of-factly.

[pokemonsquared]

Stewie's Journey- A Pokemon/Family Guy crossover.

A/N This be a cold-*** lil crossover of Pokemon season 1 n' Family Guy, also a sort of parody bout pokemon hope you enjoy.
PM list
Spoiler:


Prologue

It was a peaceful saturdizzle mornin up in tha hood of Quahog, Rhode Island. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Da birdz was rappin, gangstas was slowly wakin up, n' all was on tha down-low up in tha ghetto when suddenly.....

"I WANT TO BE THE VERY BEST, LIKE NO ONE EVER WAS!"

"Stewie what tha **** is you bustin?"

"TO CATCH THEM ALL IS MY REAL TEST, TO TRAIN THEM IS MY CAUSE!"

"Stewie, please keep it down, I've gots a project ta do!"

"POKEMON GOTTA CAT-"

At dis moment a white bipedal rappin' dawg wit a rather big-*** nozzle came by n' shut off tha TV fo' realz. At dis time, a ugly ho bustin glasses, a red hoodie n' a cold-*** lil cap came down tha stairs, visibly incensed all up in tha disturbizzle of her staturdizzle mornin peace.

"Brian, what tha **** be happenin here?" Said tha girl, whose name was Meg.

Brian tha dawg shook his head up in exasperation n' holla'd, "It all ****in started a gangbangin' few days ago when Peter decided ta upgrade our cable service. It was all fine n' Dandy especially when it came wit free cinemax, oh em hoes, I loved em so-"

"Brian git ta tha point!"

"Alright!, So Peter decided ta upgrade our cable steez ta include mo' channels n' one of em turned up ta include Japanese Anime wit one of tha shows bein Pokemon. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. All it took was one episode fo' stewie ta git buggin up on tha sheezy worse than when Peter gots buggin up on Crack yo. Dude bought tha game, tha loot, note his thugged-out n' Rupatz matchin hats, n' even tha tradin cards. I can't believe you didn't notice it sooner Meg. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Stewie is straight-up-OW!, why'd you hit mah crazy *** wit a onix figurine?"

"Because Brian, you have tha remote, NOW TIME FOR POKEMON!!"

"Hehehe Ash, yo big-*** booty is ghon never be able ta beat mah ground type Rhydon wit yo' Electric type Pikachu, prepare ta lose!"

"Never!, So long as I believe up in mah Pokemon I shall win no matter what!, PIKACHU, AIM FOR THE HORN!!"

"Yo *** did it Ash, yo' thang wit yo' Pikachu has allowed you ta by bypass tha lawz of Physics, props, here is tha Volcano badge!"

"ALRIGHT!!, I GOT THE VOLCANO BADGE!!"

Brian facepalmed, " Stewie, how tha **** can you stand ta watch dis garbage, biatch? it makes no sense n' its only purpose is ta drain tha pocketz of mazillionz of gullible lil pimps by immersin em up in a gangbangin' fantasy hoodist utopia where scrilla has no relevizzle, criminals is jokes, n' 10 year oldschool lil playas can travel tha ghetto wit no parental supavision!, It aint nuthin but straight-up unrealistic n' should not be gettin all tha ratins dat it gets!"

"Brian?"

"Yeah?"

"Kindly git dat Charizard doll n' brang it ta mah crazy *** please"

"Ughh, aiiiight"

"NOW BRIAN TASTE THE WRATH OF CHARIZARD!!!"

Da baby Stewie was straight-up odd up in nuff ways. For one, he was only one year oldschool but could rap like a 40 year old, he also had no sense of conscience n' had a head shaped like a gangbangin' footbizzle. Kick dat ****, mutha****a! At tha moment he was currently chasin Brian around doggy den wieldin tha charizard doll dat also doublez as a real flamethrower. Meg simply shook her head n' went back upstairs. Eventually Brian ducked behind tha TV n' Stewiw blew it up wit tha last bit of gin n juice up in tha flamethrower. While Stewie had tha intelligence of a 40 year old, he was still a funky-*** baby at heart n' all babies did one mutha****in thang when they broke they straight-up toy.

"WAHH!, WAAH!, I can't take it, Pokemon is mah life, mutha****a! I won't be able ta live without Ash, Pikachu, Misty, I don't like Brock, Gary, n' Charizard among others, WAHHH!!!"

Now Brian was nuff thangs, drunkard, promiscous, n' a terrible lyricist bein da most thugged-out prevalent yo, but he didn't have tha heart ta punish a cold-*** lil bustin up like a biatch baby.

"Yo Stewie is there anythang I can do fo' yo slick ***?"

"NO!, You're a meanie n' I never wanna peep yo' grill again!"

At dat Stewie ran upstairs ta his bangin room n' locked tha doors. Then he tossed a voltorb figurine tha **** into a Venusaur plushie, unlockin tha doors ta his secret pokecave. Once inside Stewie ran up in n' started makin moves, he hit dat shizzle fo' days without comin out, bustin up in Robo-Stewie ta take care of ordinary thangs as he built his stupid-*** top billin accomplishment fo' realz. A device designed ta fuse together his ghetto n' tha ghetto of Pokemon so since he can't watch pokemon, Stewie can now live pokemon. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. there was only one catch though.

"So rockin tha memonukemometer 3000 ta juice dis machine seems ta work perfectly, except fo' one thang, mine n' all y'all up in Quahog will have they memories deleted up in order fo' dis device ta work. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Should I do it, biatch? Oh yes, now I can convince everyone dat Pokemon is phat, Meg, Peter, Chris, n' especially Brian. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. Alright time ta do this, mutha****a! POWER ON!"

At dis point Stewie pressed tha button n' tha two ghettos fused wit a massive burst of light.

TBC.....

[ShadedSkies]

Dirtnap... Dirtnap is beyond our comprehension. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Da mo' our crazy-*** asses begin ta understand tha complete end of everythang our crazy-*** asses define as existing, tha mo' our crazy-*** asses realize just how tha **** unspeakably horrifyin it is. Even so, it is tha unavoidable fate dat awaits all livin thangs, without any exceptions. Our only hope of game lies up in our mobilitizzle not ta be thinkin bout it, ta appreciate thuglife fo' what tha **** it be n' ta not needlessly wallow up in sorrow over our already decided demise.


(Crazy-*** asses? What is your obsession with donkeys!?)


"Yo, yo *** is pretty def" Lucario holla'd n' broke tha silence while lookin at her, "Want ta be mah pet, biatch? Yo *** can ride on mah shoulder n' everythang."

"Can I drink yo' blood periodically?" tha Zubat axed nonchalantly.

"... If you must..." Lucario mumbled wit a shudder, starin at her straight-up obvious fangs.

"Relax, I be clownin" tha Zubat snickered mysteriously, "I don't give a **** bout daylight. This cave is mah home fo' a reason."

"Hmm..." Lucario muttered pissed tha **** offly, "It was worth a try."

"Feelin lonesome, wanderer Lucario?" tha Zubat axed wit another subtle smile appearin on her face.

".. fo' realz. A bit, maybe..." Lucario admitted.

"It'll pass" tha Zubat holla'd reassuringly, "Until then, just sit n' smoke up dis evening."

They was bout ta continue they evenin of solitude as tha silence was suddenly broken. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Sensin nuff mutha****in auras as well as hearin loud noises comin from tha cave, Lucario turned his head n' was shocked at what tha **** he saw.

A human pimp had just exited tha cave, surrounded by a swarm of aggressive Zubats n' a strange lil' small-*** creature surrounded by a funky-*** barrier. Da pimp had red afro n' a thin indigo jacket, tha straight-up original gangsta of which was ruffled n' tha latter of which was up in tattas wit bite marks n' cuts showin through, as well as a set of Pokeballs hidden within various pockets yo. His skin was mad pale yo, but fo' his wild lil' grill which was glowin wit a gangbangin' fiery fury.

Without hesitation, tha fumin trainer plucked one of tha flyin creatures outta tha air, n' punched it repeatedly on tha grill before throwin it ta tha ground n' stompin furiously upon its ****ed up remains.

"****ING ZUBAT-****S!" tha trainer yelled, "**** YOU!"

"Yo hi hi!" tha tiny creature giggled while flyin around while still bein surrounded by a bangin barrier, "That was fun, mutha****a! But masta Silver, why did you not simply wish em away?"

"I wish I could wish YOU away!" Silver roared, flailin his thugged-out arms around up in anger. Da rest of tha swarm became frightened by dis display of violence n' dispersed.

"Um..." tha lil' small-*** bein mumbled while ponderin his bangin request, "... But thatz a paradox, mutha****a! I don't be thinkin I would eva make mah dirty *** disappear!"


(He didn't say your *** was dirty! Azelf's the one with poor confidence, not you!)


"How tha **** dare you drop a rhyme ta Lugia dat way!?" Mesprit yelled angrily when tha two of em had gone bout halfway all up in tha passage, slammin Lucario ferociously against tha wall wit her powers. Lucario twisted n' turned ta rid his dirty asz of her hold, locked n loaded ta fight her tha moment he touched ground again.

"Easy," Lucario growled between gritted teeth, "Hez a oldschool creep n' I don't give a **** bout his mutha****in ***."

"Yo *** insolent fool!" Mesprit shouted back, her two tails swishin back n' forth up in annoyizzle, "You… You're just a regular Pokemon, mutha****a! Yo *** should be worshipin his *** fo' even allowin you ta be here among our asses legendaries!"

"Allowin me!?" Lucario snapped back as he pushed harder against tha psycho powers, rage fillin his *** n' strengthenin his ****in lingerin urge ta beat her up, "I be bout ta have you know, I came here ta help you ungrateful bastardz save tha ghetto!"

"**** dat ****, you didn't…" Mesprit holla'd slowly, lettin her mutha****in *** calm down as her *** eased up on her restrainin powers a lil, just ta make certain her *** wouldn't accidentally crush his *** up in her anger.

"Yo *** came here as a pet," her *** holla'd bitterly while lookin up at Lucario, "Do you straight-up be thinkin you and every last mutha****in mutha****a of yo' inferior kind can help our asses up in any way, biatch? Yo *** even turned up ta be less than useless, havin verbally assaulted tha pimped out Lugia."

"Y… Yo *** lil ****, mutha****a! I be bout ta kick yo' ***!" Lucario burst up wit fury, his bangin rage reachin its peak wit Mespritz dirty *** lyrics yo. Dude refused ta accept it; tha only mutha****in thang tha future had up in store was his wild lil' fist up in her grill n' a smile on his wild lil' grill yo. Dude tugged manically all up in tha lil' small-*** legendaryz invisible force, which was currently tha only mutha****in thang holdin his *** back from goin straight-up berserk. But **** dat shizzle yo, tha word on tha street is dat no matter how tha **** hard he fought against it, he could not break tha hold her *** had over him, n' only grew mo' n' mo' exhausted wit each try.

"They assigned mah crazy *** ta be yo' babysitter, you know…" Mesprit continued wit tha same stupid-*** sour tone ta her voice as her *** yawned while watchin his vain attempts at escaping, "I came all dis way just ta stay outside n' make shizzle you don't git outta line… Which you did, anyway. I should be up in there, why couldn't they have picked mah bruthas ta take care of somethang dis simple…?"

"BASTARD!" Lucario bellowed n' continued his crazy-*** mad struggle fo' nuff mutha****in minutes until there was not a ounce ta tha bounce of strength left up in his mutha****in *** yo. Dude considered rockin his cold-*** trump card up in a last act of spite yo, but knew he required far mo' control of his body ta pull it off fo' realz. A vicious groan slipped from his crazy-*** grill as he finally chillaxed n' hung limply against tha wall fo' realz. At long last, Mesprit busted out her grasp of his *** yo, but stayed alert up in case he tried anythang yo. Dude slumped down on tha ground, drained of all juice.

"… Da next time you come back, I be bout ta punish you fo' real," Mesprit muttered as her *** turned around ta go peep if Lugia was fine, "Now, go play n' stay outta our way. Our thugged-out asses legendaries have blingin bidnizz ta take care of."

(Not seeing much of a difference here, to be honest)

[moonlightning]

I would be willing to review more fics if they read like this.

[JX Valentine]

I would be willing to review more fics if they read like this.

So would I.

I would probably be foaming at the mouth after attempting to translate everything that's being said mentally, but it would be entirely worth it.

[moonlightning]

Oh god. This isn't fan fiction but taken straight from the main serebii site:

Meloettaz Sparklin Recital Screencaps

Da sickest ****in Pokemon porno, Kyurem VS Da Sword of Justice, has been busted out on DVD up in Japan recently n' it came wit tha special short, Meloettaz Sparklin Recital n' mah phat playa Sunain has kindly done screencapz of dis porno from her DVD. This porno short focused on tha Pokemon Meloetta n' is up in a parallel ghetto dat features a myriad of funky-*** Pokemon from tha last 15 mutha****in yearz of tha anime. Da AnimeDex has been updated wit tha vast contentz of dis short. Click tha image ta go ta our gallery but be warned however as they contain spoilaz;

[Knightfall]

Oh. My. God. Wow, this is just ... wow. So funny, yet so ... grammatically twisted. I love it.

Before:
“It’s a sad sight to see, isn’t it? Your friends need your help, but here you are, dead and of no practical use to anyone. How disappointing, but it’d be a lie to say I wasn’t anticipating such a poor performance from someone of your species,” the cold voice chided as Leo looked around the frozen arena for the source of the demon who haunted his mind.

After:
“It’s a ****ed up sight ta see, isn’t it, biatch? Yo Crazy-*** playaz need yo' help yo, but here yo *** is, dead n' of no practical bust ta every last mutha****in mutha****a yo. How tha **** disappointin yo, but it’d be a lie ta say I wasn’t anticipatin such a skanky performizzle from some mutha****a of yo' flavas,” tha cold voice chided as Leo looked around tha frozen arena fo' tha source of tha demon whoz *** hustled his crazy-*** mind. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a!

Before:
Your Majesty, be it far from me as a loyal subject of the crown to impose foreboding news upon you, but I am afraid I must. Unfortunately, costs of production of many of the items you import from our facilities have risen, and such the cost of exporting these products to your nation must rise to meet these cost demands.

After:
Yo Crazy-*** Majesty, be it far from mah crazy *** as a loyal subject of tha crown ta impose forebodin shizzle upon you yo, but I be afraid I must. Unfortunately, costz of thang of nuff of tha **** you import from our facilitizzles have risen, n' such tha cost of exportin these shizzle ta yo' hood must rise ta hook up these cost demands.

Before: “I’m not going to stand aside and let him die like the others. I have the ability to ensure his survival, but if we leave then we seal his fate. Please Henry, I need your help, we don’t have much time left,” Doug said as he continued typing.

After: “I’m not goin ta stand aside n' let his *** die like tha others. I have tha mobilitizzle ta ensure his survival yo, but if our crazy-*** asses leave then our crazy-*** asses seal his wild lil' fate. Please Henry, I need yo' help, our crazy-*** asses don’t have much time left,” Doug holla'd as he continued typing

~~~~~~~~~~~`

Man ... absolutely fantastic. Thanks, Moonlightning for finding this.

Knightfall signing off...

[Crystal]

I could not understand a word after the "translation" of Gizoogle.

So unfortunately I don't find the 'fun' of it.

[Avenger Angel]

Wow, way to make a gangsta-inspired mess of my story. I have to admit, though, this is a pretty funny way to mess with a story, especially a Pokemon fan fiction. I don't think I could read an entire story like this though, it does still make a mess out of the dialogue and the diction. Hilarious find though. Everyone acts and talks so ridiculously out of character that you can't help but laugh at it.

[SoulMuse]

I have to admit that this was pretty comical...although I would hate to read an entire story written that way.

Also....any story that has somewhat controversial or just blatantly dark topics in it......I advise against running doing this to it.

That said, some amusing changes.

Before:

“Hidden Power! Follow that up with a Psychic!” I ordered, and Alakazam grunted in acknowledgement.

“Dodge the Hidden Power, and then hit it hard with another Force Palm!” Marley called out. Breloom stepped back, preparing to dodge.


After

Hidden Juice, mutha****a! Big up dat up wit a Psychic!” I ordered, n' Alakazam grunted up in acknowledgement.

“Dodge tha Hidden Juice, n' then hit it hard wit another Force Palm!” Marley called out. Breloom stepped back, preparin ta dodge.
-------
Not quite sure how Hidden Power becomes Hidden Juice...but Force Palm gets left alone?

Also on the list of move that gets edited...Swords Dance became Slyrics Dizzle?

------
Before:

“Tyranitar, Superpower!” I snarled, calling out the massive Pokémon, who landed, and promptly began to glow blue, while running towards Chansey, a violent snarl on his lips. The armored behemoth’s eyes smoldered with rage, all of which was focused on the pink blob before me.

After:

“Tyranitar, Supapower!” I snarled, callin up tha massive Pokemon, whoz *** landed, n' promptly ****in started ta glow blue, while hustlin towardz Chansey, a violent snarl on his ****in lips. Da armored behemoth’s eyes smoldaed wit rage, all of which was focused on tha pink blob before mah dirty ***.
---------

Bullet Punch became Cap Punch as well......
------
Before:
I spared a single second to mentally curse him, before I focused on the battle.


After:
I spared a single second ta menstrually curse him, before I focused on tha battle.
-

Good find, this certianlly entertained me.

[SpyroxPikachu]

Welp. Let's try with my Sherlock fics.

Original

“Evening.” Said the familiar voice, calm and steady. The man looked at him, his usual expression lining his face. A large green jacket hanging over his usually slender and agile body.

“John..?” Said Sherlock, rather bewildered. He was shocked, he didn’t know what to say. John was his closest friend, his only friend. Yet if he trusted the evidence around him, it would seem that John was indeed Moriarty, the man he had trusted might be a dangerous killer.

“Bet you never saw this coming.” Said John, a smile forming on his face. Sherlock stood still rather shocked not knowing what to say. John shook his head and laughed. “Oh man I really got you didn’t I?” Laughed John manically as he took off the jacket revealing a black suit.

“John but… You’re my best friend, John Watson, this can’t be happening…” Said Sherlock, his eyes drifting from John to the floor, not knowing what to believe anymore. John just laughed once again and began to speak.

“Oh man you really are clueless aren’t you? The name’s John, John Moriarty. There’s never been a John Watson! He was someone made up, obviously proving how ordinary you are.” John smirked again, obviously enjoying Sherlock discomfort with this realization. John walked towards Sherlock and clasped his face in his hands, Sherlock noticed the gun in his pocket. He wanted to grab it and make this nightmare go away, but he could never shoot John, how could he shoot his blogger?

After

"Evening." Said tha familiar voice, calm n' steady. Da playa looked at him, his usual expression linin his wild lil' grill fo' realz. A big-*** chronicjacket hangin over his probably slender n' agile body.

"John..?" Said Sherlock, rather bewildered. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Dude was shocked, he didn’t know what tha **** ta say. Jizzy was his closest playa, his only playa. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Yet if he trusted tha evidence around him, it would seem dat Jizzy was indeed Moriarty, tha playa he had trusted might be a thugged-out dangerous killer.

"Bet you never saw dis coming." Said John, a smile formin on his wild lil' face. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Sherlock stood still rather shocked not knowin what tha **** ta say. Jizzy shook his head n' laughed. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! "Oh playa I straight-up gots you didn’t I?" Laughed Jizzy manically as he took off tha jacket revealin a funky-*** black suit.

"Jizzy but… You’re mah dopest playa, Jizzy Watson, dis can’t be happening…" Said Sherlock, his wild lil' ****in eyes driftin from Jizzy ta tha floor, not knowin what tha **** ta believe anymore. Jizzy just laughed once again n' ****in started ta speak.

"Oh playa you straight-up is clueless aren’t yo slick ***, biatch? Da name’s John, Jizzy Moriarty. There’s never been a Jizzy Watson, mutha****a! Dude was some mutha****a done cooked up up, obviously provin how tha **** ordinary yo *** is." Jizzy smirked again, obviously enjoyin Sherlock discomfort wit dis realization. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Jizzy strutted towardz Sherlock n' clasped his wild lil' grill up in his hands, Sherlock noticed tha glock up in his thugged-out lil' pocket yo. Dude wanted ta grab it n' make dis nightmare go away yo, but he could never blast John, how tha **** could he blast his blogger?

Oh my god

--------------------------------------------------
How about another story?

Before

“Sherlock?” He called, waiting hopefully for some sort of response, all he heard was the echo of his own voice against the walls.

Odd. He thought to himself, beginning to rise from his seated position on the couch. He began to climb the stairs to Sherlock’s bedroom, calling out again. “Sherlock?” his voice was a little more urgent this time, more panicked. But that made no difference to the sickening darkness that surrounded him. He began to move fast up the stairs, ascending at a ridiculously fast pace. “Sherlock!” He called out again as he reached the top of the stairs. He looked around, no signs of life except his own.

He ran towards Sherlock’s bedroom, the door was shut, he banged on it. “Sherlock! This isn’t funny!” He shouted.

No Response.

“Sherlock, I’m coming in!”

No Response.

“I’ll break the bloody door down!” He spat.

No Response.

He finally threw his body weight at the door, causing it to swing open. His eyes scanned the room, no Sherlock, window open, note on bed. He began getting more and more tense, unsure of what to do. He rushed to the bed, the smell of Sherlock rushed over him, he took it all in as he picked up the note.

Hello Johnny-Boy!

Sherlock wanted to come play with me awhile, he was desperately hoping you would come and join us! It is a party after all.

Regards, Jim Moriarty xx.

Attached was a picture of Sherlock, bound at the wrists and ankles, wearing nothing but a pair of white underwear. He was blindfolded, but John could almost fell the burning sensation of defiant eyes rush over him.

After

"Sherlock?" Dude called, waitin hopefully fo' some sort of response, all he heard was tha echo of his own voice against tha walls.

Odd. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Dude thought ta his dirty ***, beginnin ta rise from his seated posizzle on tha couch yo. Dude ****in started ta climb tha stairs ta Sherlock’s bedroom, callin up again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "Sherlock?" his voice was a lil mo' urgent dis time, mo' panicked. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! But dat done cooked up no difference ta tha sickenin darknizz dat surrounded his mutha****in *** yo. Dude ****in started ta move fast up tha stairs, ascendin at a ridiculously fast pace. "Sherlock!" Dude called up again as he reached tha top of tha stairs yo. Dude looked around, no signz of thuglife except his own.

Dude ran towardz Sherlock’s bedroom, tha door was shut, he banged on dat ****. "Sherlock, mutha****a! This aint funny!" Dude shouted.

No Response.

"Sherlock, I’m comin in!"

No Response.

"I’ll break tha bloody door down!" Dude spat.

No Response.

Dude finally threw his body weight all up in tha door, causin it ta swin open. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch yo. His eyes scanned tha room, no Sherlock, window open, note on bed. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Dude ****in started gettin mo' n' mo' tense, unsure of what tha **** ta do yo. Dude rushed ta tha bed, tha smell of Sherlock rushed over him, he took it all up in as he picked up tha note.

Yo mutha****a Johnny-Boy!

Sherlock wanted ta come play wit mah crazy *** awhile, he was desperately hopin you would come n' join us, mutha****a! It be a jam afta all.

Regards, Jim Moriarty xx.

Attached was a picture of Sherlock, bound all up in tha wrists n' ankles, bustin not a god damn thang but a pair of white underwear yo. Dude was blindfolded yo, but Jizzy could almost fell tha burnin sensation of defiant eyes rush over his mutha****in ***.

I can't even. Oh my god.

[JX Valentine]

You’re mah dopest playa, Jizzy Watson

And right about there is where I lost it. Please someone write a full fic in which Sherlock (and maybe only Sherlock) speaks like this.

[SpyroxPikachu]

and right about there is where i lost it. Please someone write a full fic in which sherlock (and maybe only sherlock) speaks like this.

Challenge accepted.

[RealRaymon]

Before:
(Max goes across many buildings in the city and sees the large yellow building with a lightning sign on it. He sees Wattson, who is standing near it.)

Max: “Oh, hi, Mr. Watson! What are you doing here?”

Wattson: “Hi Max! Oh, I just went for some fresh air! Are you ready to battle?”

Max: “I sure am!”

Wattson: “All right! Let’s start!”

(They enter the gym and go to the battlefield. Wattson’s assistant comes out of room where he was doing some research work.)

Wattson’s assistant (remembers something): “Oops! I forgot to take the flags!”

(Then he takes them and comes to Max.)

Wattson’s assistant: “Hi Max!”

Max: “Hello sir!”

After:
(Max goes across nuff buildings up in tha hood n' sees tha big-*** yellow buildin wit a lightnin sign on it yo. Dude sees Wattson, whoz *** is standin near dat ****.)

Max: “Oh, hi, Mista Mutha****in Watson, mutha****a! What is you bustin here?”

Wattson: “Yo Max, mutha****a! Oh, I just went fo' some fresh air, mutha****a! Is you locked n loaded ta battle?”

Max: “I shizzle am!”

Wattson: “All right, mutha****a! Let’s start!”

(They enter tha gym n' go ta tha battlefield. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Wattson’s assistant comes outta room where he was bustin some research work.)

Wattson’s assistant (rethugz somethang): “Oops, mutha****a! I forgot ta take tha flags!”

(Then he takes em n' comes ta Max.)

Wattson’s assistant: “Yo Max!”

Max: “Yo mutha****a sir!”

[Gothitelle K]

I'm sorry but am I the only one who was brought to tears by this exersise? Anyway, Cyrus' speech! (well, modified by me in my Future Member story)

BEFORE:


"Hear me, fellow citizens! My name, as I appear to you today, is Cyrus. This world of ours is a crude one. In a word, it is incomplete. It has been, and always will be, a struggle to survive in this world. We humans and Pokémon are likewise incomplete. Because we are all so lacking, we fight, we maim... It is ugly. I hate the incompleteness. That we are all incomplete, I hate it with my entire body and being. The world should be complete. The world must change. Then, who will change it? Me, Cyrus. And Team Galactic. Yes, I am urging you to join Team Galactic today. Together, we can change the world. We can end all wars and expose the secrets of this world. We can finally live in one peace. So onward my friends. Thanks for your time.”

AFTER:

"Hear me, fellow playa haters, mutha****a! My ****in name, as I step tha **** up ta you todizzle, is Cyrus. This ghetto of ours be a cold-*** lil crude one. In a word, it is incomplete. It has been, n' always will be, a struggle ta survive up in dis ghetto. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Our thugged-out asses humans n' Pokemon is likewise incomplete. Because our crazy-*** asses is all so lacking, our crazy-*** asses fight, our crazy-*** asses maim... It be ugly. I don't give a **** bout tha incompleteness. That our crazy-*** asses is all incomplete, I don't give a **** bout it wit mah entire body n' being. Da ghetto should be complete. Da ghetto must chizzle. Then, whoz *** will chizzle it, biatch? Me, Cyrus fo' realz. And Crew Galactic. Yes, I be urgin you ta join Crew Galactic todizzle. Together, our crazy-*** asses can chizzle tha ghetto. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Our thugged-out asses can end all wars n' expose tha secretz of dis ghetto. Right back up in yo mutha****in ***. Y'all KNOW dat ****, mutha****a! Our thugged-out asses can finally live up in one peace. So onward mah playas. Thanks fo' yo' time.”

[jireh the provider]

Seriously now, you remin me of that bad*** Wii game callin Madworld. Should I give references to the mutha****ing black baron?

[Kutie Pie]

I found a few more. This is gold.

*~*~*

BEFORE: With a slow nod, the psycat crossed into the thick wood, telepathically tugging Mew behind him. The once-grand phoenix deplorably watched the small cat bob in place, taking note of her limp tail skimming the grass as he followed the pair.

AFTER: With a slow nod, tha psycat crossed tha f*ck into tha thick wood, telepathically tuggin Mew behind his muthaf*ckin ass. Da once-grand phoenix deplorably watched tha lil' small-ass pussaaaaay bob up in place, takin note of her limp tail skimmin tha grass as he followed tha pair.

*~*~*

_{Note: he's talking about a berry.}

BEFORE: "Are you going to eat it?"

AFTER: "Is you goin ta smoke it?"

*~*~*

BEFORE: An arm suddenly jerked, and Mew's senses refocused. Immediately, she felt the inside of her mouth was warm and moist. The transition of temperature had stopped, her lips slightly parted and covered. Mewtwo's hand on the back of her head still gripped but loosely, hardly moving. Her brow furrowed thoughtfully. It was... strange. Was he finished? Did she happen to sleep all day? Slowly but surely, she opened her eyes, tears long ago subsided, meeting the soft gaze of violet. She couldn't help staring back. There was a different impression in the depths, the sight of an actual living, breathing, feeling soul, a light shining through that wasn't there before. It was beautiful. To be sure she could breathe, Mew took a breath.

AFTER: An arm suddenly jerked, n' Mewz senses refocused. Y'all KNOW dat sh*t, muthaf*cka! Immediately, her ass felt tha inside of her grill was warm n' moist. Da transizzle of temperature had stopped, her lips slightly parted n' covered. Y'all KNOW dat sh*t, muthaf*cka! Mewtwoz hand on tha back of her head still gripped but loosely, hardly movin yo. Her brow furrowed thoughtfully. It was... strange. Was he finished, biatch? Did her ass happen ta chill all day, biatch? Slowly but surely, her ass opened her eyes, tears long ago subsided, meetin tha soft gaze of violet. Right back up in yo muthaf*ckin ass. Biatch couldn't help starin back. There was a thugged-out different impression up in tha depths, tha sight of a actual living, breathang, feeling soul, a light shinin all up in dat wasn't there before. It was dope. To be shizzle her ass could breathe, Mew took a funky-ass breath.

_{Well ain't that romantic xD.}