Title: The Lover of Science And The Drunk Nun

Rating: G

Pairing: Iris/Ema

Notes: For the kink meme, the prompt this OP gave was a drunk Iris being friendly and snuggle to someone she has never met in the games. The OP loved femslash and I think that Iris would have been good friends with Lana in prison so I chose Iris x Ema. The one I posted is a bit different to the one I posted on the kink meme. Enjoy the crackyness XD.

Disclaimer: Bikini, Iris and Ema Skye are copyright to the amazing Capcom.

The Lover Of Science And The Drunk Nun

Ema decided to take a visit to the temple for some research on the weather. Studying how much the climate has changed over the years. There's been a non stop talk about it for quite some years, and Ema wanted to do some scientific research. Any excuse to avoid the glimmerous fop was wonderful. Another reason for visiting the temple was that the shrine maiden, Iris had been a good friend of her sister. Iris and Lana had met at jail and were both charged as accomplices to murder. Lana was still serving her last months of her sentence, whilst Iris had just been released last month.

The head nun, Sister Bikini was really nice. She thought the name was strange for a nun, but Bikini was nice, nevertheless - she didn't mind sharing some snackeroos with her. She was quite a good laugh. Then she finally met Lana's good friend, but she didn't expect the fragrance of whisky and vodka. Physically, she matched Lana's description; raven hair with pretty braids around her head, a gentle fair face with a blob of crimson on each cheek and large eyes as charming as a butterfly.

"Hello there Iris," chuckled the larger than life nun Sister Bikini. "You are looking very hyper today." It wasn't every day Sister Iris was dancing around, with arms like bird's wings and rotating like a ballerina. Ema saw the Bikini smile in glee like a proud mother. Sister Bikini then whispered to Ema, "I think she's a little too much whisky."

"Scientifically speaking," Ema responded, "I think she's had at the minimum of twelve units of alcohol."

"You're a clever girl, aren't you Ema?" Bikini laughed out again. "Don't be scared of Iris, she's lovely drunk or sober. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" They both sat down, and as if Ema was in the cinema munching popcorn, she watched Iris dance around, stuffing her face with snackeroos in the process. "You sure like your snacks Mystic Ema," Bikini said. "You're going to ruin your tea, Sister Iris cooks a lovely roast dinner."

"I guess it's just a habit," Ema pondered, pouting at Iris.

"Well, I'll leave you too alone now," Bikini announced, standing up ready to leave. "I gotta go to the other side and get something to sober up Iris. Have fun."

The second Bikini left, Iris twirled her way to the seat next to Ema. She smiled, blushing harder and said, "hello there beautiful lady." Her breath stank of whisky, but it was hard not to love that sweet gentle voice that slurred. On top of it, Ema had been called something she hadn't been called in a while. Ema's ceased snacking and they kept silent with constant eye contact.

The detective didn't really know what to say to Sister Iris. She thought it wouldn't be wise to talk about Lana right now, so she responded with a smile.

"You're b-b-blushing!" both of Iris's index fingers poked Ema's red cheeks. And with that, Ema froze and noticed that the alcohol had cut of her mentality age by thirty years. Iris took out some glass tubs from Ema's handbag and juggled them. "Ema you have a lot of sugar in your bag."

"These aren't sugar," Ema snapped taking back the glass tubs with all the powder she used for her forensic stuff. "They're special powder for forensic science purposes," Ema told her. Iris then stole Ema's bag of snackeroos and tried to munch them like Ema does. Only to fail and accidentally bite her tongue. Iris cupped her own cheek with her hand. "Are you all right, Sister Iris?" Ema asked in concern.

"SURE I AM FINE!" Iris squealed with eruptions of giggle. Suddenly she bounced onto Ema's lap. Clinging on her lab coat, and found her own bouncy castle named Ema. It wasn't long until Iris quickly snuggled Ema. Her lustrous black hair hung from Ema's white lab coat. Ema was more worried about where her head was located: on her chest. "You have lovely breasts..." mumbled Iris. The alcohol smell grew stronger and stronger but her voice remained sweet and gentle like a child's. As much as Ema wanted to push her off, she couldn't because she temporally a bed to Iris.

"I love you," whispered Iris rubbing their noses together.

"Aww," was Ema's response. She succumbed to her sweetness and patted her back. At last, Ema had enjoyed the snuggling.