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Thread: Oh, the woes of sexual immorality! The ethics of casual sex.

  1. #51
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    I'm massively for extensive sex ed, albeit beginning at an appropriate age - I think there's something to be said for preserving innocence and I'm not sure children below the age of, say, 10 will have any conception of or desire to partake in sex, so such education might be wasted if not harmful at that stage. I'll throw in another caveat: such education should steer children towards an appropriate age when they make the choice. Coming from the UK, 16 seems sensible, as I said before sex can have a massive impact on people's lives in multiple ways and those below a certain age often can't be trusted to handle it responsibly, regardless of how much education they receive. Again, better sex ed is hugely important, but it needs to applied in the correct way I feel.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gothitelle K View Post
    As for sleeping around, it's not really going to affect the way I treat them per-say, but I wouldn't want my kids to be around them. I wouldn't want them to think that hopping from one person to another was okay. Especially if they are in a committed relationship with someone else. I would uncomfortable if they were around my partner (but it's not my place to tell him who he can be friends with).

    I also wouldn't want to be with someone who has that history.

    Funny thing is, when a man *****s himself, he's called a man. (I personally think he's a *****)
    "I won't treat them any differently...but I wouldn't want them around my loved ones." That is kind of the definition of treating them differently. "Black people don't bother me but I wouldn't want them near my friends/family."

    No, the majority of people are not likely to tell every person they meet about their sex lives, no matter how many sex partners they've had. Especially not to kids. Stop making assumptions, people.

    Also I agree that the double-standard against men sleeping around is terrible, but slut-shaming them does not make things better. You shouldn't judge or call people names, no matter their gender. We as a society need to stop slut-shaming, period.



    Quote Originally Posted by Gothitelle K View Post
    It's disgusting that.... if I had kids, I wouldn't want them emulating people who have sex with multiple people just for kicks?
    Do you honestly think having multiple sex partners is the worst thing in the world that will turn your kinds into immoral, dangerous people? That is what you want to keep your kids away from, as opposed to say bigotry, racism and homophobia? Instead of caring about preventing your kids from taking on horrible worldviews and learning to treat others terribly, you want to teach them to judge people based on something that's none of your business and doesn't affect you, so they can judge them and treat them terribly? You want to teach your kids to judge others and be intollerant?


    Quote Originally Posted by petrelicious View Post
    It's something that shouldn't be kept from a partner though - whoever you are dating has a right to know, especially if you haven't been having safe sex. If there is a possible risk of an STI then it's simply a matter of courtesy to tell your partner of the risk. If they don't want to be with you for it - it's their choice. If they don't like you for it, then you shouldn't like them for it. Simple. It may be a little demoralising, but if the person loves you enough they shouldn't be bothered.
    It goes without saying that you always tell your partner your heath status and that they tell you theirs, even if you're both virgins. You should always get checked if you are sexually active. As for your sexual history, unless your partner asks, I don't think it's vital for you to suddenly say "oh by the way, I've had X kind of sex with Y number of people" unless there's a reason for it. If your partner asks, be honest.


    Quote Originally Posted by Scammel View Post
    That's far too much of a hands-off approach for my tastes. We can educate them all we like, the fact of that matter remains that children tend to be irresponsible. Lord knows enough adults manage to get it wrong, something as important (and potentially life changing) as sex is not something we should be trusting children with.
    You make it sound like we're giving kids this big shiny key that unlocks Pandora's box! But we can't give or take away that key, because to have sex, all you need is genitals, which kids definitely have. Whether you teach them how to have sex or not, they will learn, and they will eventually do. That makes it our responsibility to teach them how to prepare themselves and ensuring they know the consequences, how to make the right decisions and how be safe.


    Quote Originally Posted by Jb View Post
    At this point, I don't think sex ed is ever going to work to the point of being widely successful. My school had a pretty great sex ed course, that took the whole school year. Most kids opted out, and the ones that didn't, you'd never think they even went to class.
    What do you mean by "widely successful"? We've already seen the benefits of it, and isn't any improvement in this area a good thing? Let's look at a few benefits now:
    Quote Originally Posted by http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/publications450
    • Behavioral outcomes have included delaying the initiation of sex as well as reducing the frequency of sex, the number of new partners, and the incidence of unprotected sex, and/or increasing the use of condoms and contraception among sexually active participants. Long-term impacts have included lower STI and/or pregnancy rates.
    • Evaluations of comprehensive sex education and HIV/ STI prevention programs show that they do not increase rates of sexual initiation, do not lower the age at which youth initiate sex, and do not increase the frequency of sex or the number of sex partners among sexually active youth.
    • Between 1991 and 2004, the U.S. teen birth rate fell from 62 to 41 per 1,000 female teens.
    You can check their 27 sources if you'd like, but if anyone has a better idea that will be half as effective, now's the time to speak up.


    Quote Originally Posted by Jb View Post
    Hey, don't me wrong. I'm not against teaching it. I just don't think it'll do much good. The first thing schools need to do is get rid of that form that lets parents sign their kids out of the class. Why any parent would sign this is beyond me. Then stop integrating it into health/gym class. MY middle school did that. We didn't there except that if got an STD/I we'd die.
    See above for the good it does. And agreed that kids should not be allowed to opt out. Just because your parents or religion don't want you to be educated doesn't mean you shouldn't learn that 1+1=2.


    Quote Originally Posted by Scammel View Post
    I'm massively for extensive sex ed, albeit beginning at an appropriate age - I think there's something to be said for preserving innocence and I'm not sure children below the age of, say, 10 will have any conception of or desire to partake in sex, so such education might be wasted if not harmful at that stage. I'll throw in another caveat: such education should steer children towards an appropriate age when they make the choice. Coming from the UK, 16 seems sensible, as I said before sex can have a massive impact on people's lives in multiple ways and those below a certain age often can't be trusted to handle it responsibly, regardless of how much education they receive. Again, better sex ed is hugely important, but it needs to applied in the correct way I feel.
    Do you consider human anatomy sex ed? I think it's vital to teach kids about their bodies, especially to inform them that as they go through puberty their bodies will change so they won't freak out. This is especially important for young girls who will start getting their periods, so they're not left entirely clueless when they start getting cramps and needing female hygiene products. Everything else quite naturally follows, but if you want to save that for age 15/16, that doesn't sound unreasonable.

    Also, please see my response to jb about sex ed not resulting in kids having sex at earlier ages.



    Also, this subject is entirely unrelated to the thread topic. If all conversation on the topic of having multiple partners and slut-shaming has ended, I'll close this thread and someone can start a new one.

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    Last edited by Psychic; 4th April 2013 at 3:07 AM.

  3. #53
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    I'm a straight, heterosexual, 18-yers old male virgin who finally has his first girlfriend since 30 January 2013 (a Serebii-relationship, I haven't met her in real life yet, because of sheer distance between where I live and where she lives). I'd NEVER have sex outside of a relationship, I'd never even consider it. I personally think sex is something that should be done with a partner, someone you love. So for me, no sex without true love.

    However, if someone decides to have sex outside of a relationship, I won't judge them for it, I just disagree with it. If someone wants to have sex out of pure lust, without any love involved, they should by all means do that, as long as they don't cheat (Cheating is NEVER acceptable, as far as I'm concerned). People shouldn't judge them for it and treat them as inferior to people who aren't easy about sex. People shouldn't be judged by and/or treated because of the personal choices they make. People are people, no matter how they look, what their political preference is, what their nationality is, what their skin colour is, and of course we are all equal regardless of sexual history as well.

    However, I do understand why some people don't want a relationship with someone who had sex with many people while not being in a relationship:
    - They might think those people are "easy" about sex, improving the chances of those people cheating on them. And of course some people are easy about sex and cheat easily, but there are probably also people who have sex outside of a relationship but remain faithful to their partner when being in a relationship. This can only be judged ona a case-by-case basis, and not by a generalisation.
    - They might prefer a virgin: if they make someone lose his/her virginity, they truly feel like that person is truly "his/hers". If someone had sex with a lot of people before getting with his/her current partner, that partner might feel like he/she is only "one of the many temporaily sexual partners".

    Anyways, I understand both sides. I strongly believe in "no sex without love", people shouldn't judge me for it. Some others believe in "sex is fine without a relationship", people shouldn't judge them for it. People should make their own choices without getting unfairly judged for it.
    Last edited by AquaMilotic; 5th April 2013 at 2:00 PM.

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    Yeah, this may not be a popular or widespread opinion, in fact it likely won't be, but personally, I have no objections to either myself or my romantic partner having multiple sexual partners.

    Multiple romantic partners, as in a threeway and up, I'll be more reluctant about, but assuming that all partners were aware of it, past 15, the age of consent, and willing to engage in a sexual relationship, I'll be fine with it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by miles0624 View Post
    Now can you use a person's sexual history to judge a character. Hell yes. The same if the person never had sex, or went to jail, or some other crap. It is a tool we use to see them. It doesn't mean that is all somebody judges them on.
    Oh yes this.

    We can use it to judge people, but it doesn't mean the only factor. We use so many factors upon who we want for our partner. How much sex they've had can be one of them, but it is not the end all be all.

    All I care about the difference between immediate judgement and later judgement. Emotions make you jump to conclusions really freaken easily. Fear takes over. Even if its something incredibly small/miniscule.
    Besides, if we wanna be technical, judging happens no matter what. You immediately take in an interpretation of someone from a first impression. The difference is what you do with that interpretation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Crudelis ventus View Post
    It really isn't. You may get into a car crash tomorrow, it's no reason to not drive cars or deem people that drive cars as "engaging in risky behavior." People might lie to you or do wrong to you, it's no reason to stay at home and live the rest of your life as a hermit because you're afraid of being hurt by others. You may get food poisoning and die by going out to eat, it's no reason to never go out with your friends and try a place you've never eaten at before. A promiscuous person may have health problems like self esteem or any of the other things you mentioned, but that doesn't mean that people who are promiscuous are inherently more likely to do those things.
    He exaggerated, I'm almost sure.
    Not every time. But most of the decisions we make are based around "mays". Just because maybe you'll be in trouble, you're right, is no reason by itself to avoid someone like that. But it CAN carry negative conseqences, and to not worry about those in a relationship is ridiculously stupid to me.
    Really, I'm going to re-iterate, MOST of the judgements we make are based around "Mays". Is it to dangerous, or is it not? What should we REALLY worry about and fix is generally what most debates are about.
    It's fine to worry about it and even mention it as a concern to them. To say how stupid they are when they know that just makes it worse, and achieves nothing but pissed off people. Especially when they don't even think that, they just felt it out of natural worry about consequences.
    Though aside from my own desire to do this, I have no reason to respond to you. You're banned...lol



    Assuming the info I've gotten is correct science... An assumption by the side of the brain that memorizes things is not a good reason to judge a that person's character. That's something you should take up with humans overall as a flaw, rather just one person. People make easy assumptions just live life, the body generally loves predictability after all. (The are exceptions of course. You atcaully get more enjoy out of something surprising...As long as it coincides somewhat with you believe in. Which ends up going right back to predictability.)
    I'm at school right now, so I can't correct my info about brain habits. Go ahead and refute it if you want, but I'm going to fix it anyway when I get home.
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  6. #56
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    Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up.

    Quote Originally Posted by AquaMilotic View Post
    However, I do understand why some people don't want a relationship with someone who had sex with many people while not being in a relationship:
    - They might think those people are "easy" about sex, improving the chances of those people cheating on them. And of course some people are easy about sex and cheat easily, but there are probably also people who have sex outside of a relationship but remain faithful to their partner when being in a relationship. This can only be judged ona a case-by-case basis, and not by a generalisation.
    If someone looks at someone as "easy" or a cheater because they have casual sex, that's straight-up ****-shaming and is not okay. Someone who has a lot of casual sex is not automatically a cheater and it's wrong to think it's okay for people to have that idea in their heads.

    - They might prefer a virgin: if they make someone lose his/her virginity, they truly feel like that person is truly "his/hers". If someone had sex with a lot of people before getting with his/her current partner, that partner might feel like he/she is only "one of the many temporaily sexual partners".
    What you've just described is classic abuse behavior. The whole concept of virginity is pretty fucked up but I'll ignore that for now. No one owns someone just because they're in a relationship. No one owns someone just because they've had sex. If you (general you) look at your partner as something you own, like a piece of property, you're an emotionally abusive person. I'd honestly question the motives of someone who "prefers virgins" (I can sort of understand if someone is a virgin himself/herself but that's still kind of iffy to me) because it's placing value on something meaningless and arbitrary, and is just kindling for more abusive behaviors (such as the idea of someone being yours if you have sex with them, etc.).

    Anyways, I understand both sides. I strongly believe in "no sex without love", people shouldn't judge me for it. Some others believe in "sex is fine without a relationship", people shouldn't judge them for it. People should make their own choices without getting unfairly judged for it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesky Persian View Post
    Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up.



    If someone looks at someone as "easy" or a cheater because they have casual sex, that's straight-up ****-shaming and is not okay. Someone who has a lot of casual sex is not automatically a cheater and it's wrong to think it's okay for people to have that idea in their heads.
    Agree!

    What you've just described is classic abuse behavior. The whole concept of virginity is pretty fucked up but I'll ignore that for now. No one owns someone just because they're in a relationship. No one owns someone just because they've had sex. If you (general you) look at your partner as something you own, like a piece of property, you're an emotionally abusive person. I'd honestly question the motives of someone who "prefers virgins" (I can sort of understand if someone is a virgin himself/herself but that's still kind of iffy to me) because it's placing value on something meaningless and arbitrary, and is just kindling for more abusive behaviors (such as the idea of someone being yours if you have sex with them, etc.).
    I agree with this completely. I am married and in no way think my wife is my property. In fact if I acted like that she would probably punch me in the face. Just because you are in a relationship with someone or having sex with someone doesnt mean you own them in anyway. I feel like when people use the phrases "he/she is my girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife" that they actually think that they own the person or have rights to the person in someway. Titles like that are only go as far as the other persons will and morals, nothing more.

    Anyways, I understand both sides. I strongly believe in "no sex without love", people shouldn't judge me for it. Some others believe in "sex is fine without a relationship", people shouldn't judge them for it. People should make their own choices without getting unfairly judged for it.
    I understand what you are saying. I disagree simply because I think sex is very enjoyable outside of love. One night stands or whatever you call them can be very pleasing and as long as you are smart and careful, I fully endorse them. I am not saying you are wrong or I am right, just disagreeing and stating why.

    Sex in a marriage is different though. While there is always love, "sex" can be broken down into "lovemaking" or just "sex". That is my opinion thoguh.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesky Persian View Post
    Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up.
    First of all, in my last post, I just described possible explanations for why some people prefer people with little to no sexual history over people who had sex with many people, so not my opinion.

    If someone looks at someone as "easy" or a cheater because they have casual sex, that's straight-up ****-shaming and is not okay. Someone who has a lot of casual sex is not automatically a cheater and it's wrong to think it's okay for people to have that idea in their heads.
    Of course I'd never say all people who have a lot of casual sex are cheaters, of course many of them are able to remain faithful in a relationship. I only said that I somewhat understand why some people fear being cheated on, even though that fear often isn't justified.

    What you've just described is classic abuse behavior. The whole concept of virginity is pretty fucked up but I'll ignore that for now. No one owns someone just because they're in a relationship. No one owns someone just because they've had sex. If you (general you) look at your partner as something you own, like a piece of property, you're an emotionally abusive person. I'd honestly question the motives of someone who "prefers virgins" (I can sort of understand if someone is a virgin himself/herself but that's still kind of iffy to me) because it's placing value on something meaningless and arbitrary, and is just kindling for more abusive behaviors (such as the idea of someone being yours if you have sex with them, etc.).
    I definitely don't see my girlfriend as property, and most people don't see their partners as property. With a partner being "yours/his/hers", I just meant that people might feel like their partner is their partner, that they don't have to "share" their partner's love with previous partners. Some people might feel like they're just one of the many temporarily sex mates of their partner, if their partner has a big and long sexual history.

    Again, these aren't my opinions, I was only trying to explain why I do understand people who do prefer virgins...

    Again, it's perfectly fine if people choose to have casual sex, as long as they're not cheating on their partner. However, I'd never have sex without a relationship: no sex without love for me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AquaMilotic View Post
    First of all, in my last post, I just described possible explanations for why some people prefer people with little to no sexual history over people who had sex with many people, so not my opinion.

    Of course I'd never say all people who have a lot of casual sex are cheaters, of course many of them are able to remain faithful in a relationship. I only said that I somewhat understand why some people fear being cheated on, even though that fear often isn't justified.

    I definitely don't see my girlfriend as property, and most people don't see their partners as property. With a partner being "yours/his/hers", I just meant that people might feel like their partner is their partner, that they don't have to "share" their partner's love with previous partners. Some people might feel like they're just one of the many temporarily sex mates of their partner, if their partner has a big and long sexual history.

    Again, these aren't my opinions, I was only trying to explain why I do understand people who do prefer virgins...

    Again, it's perfectly fine if people choose to have casual sex, as long as they're not cheating on their partner. However, I'd never have sex without a relationship: no sex without love for me.
    I never said they were your opinion, but this is the debate subforum so when you suggest really terrible reasons for why people would be against casual sex, I'm going to refute them. If you're going to play devil's advocate, you've gotta be willing to back it up.

    You're right, the fear of being cheated on by a partner who has a sexual history is unjustified and is therefore a stupid reason to prefer virgins.

    I think the idea of people seeing their partners as property is a lot more prevalent than you'd think. Jealousy (even if it's of previous partners) is a form of control. If you feel like you have to "share" your love with your partner's previous partners then you have a control issue. (Again, general "you," not you in particular.)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesky Persian View Post
    I never said they were your opinion, but this is the debate subforum so when you suggest really terrible reasons for why people would be against casual sex, I'm going to refute them. If you're going to play devil's advocate, you've gotta be willing to back it up.
    Um... I'm giving bad reasons for why some people prefer virgins, not for being against casual sex...

    Anyways, do you think it's fine if a person would never have casual sex himself, but isn't judgemental about others having casual sex?

    You're right, the fear of being cheated on by a partner who has a sexual history is unjustified and is therefore a stupid reason to prefer virgins.
    Well, that depends. If a person cheated on his/her previous partner(s), I'd say the fear of being cheated on is justified.

    However, if someone has casual sex only when being single and never cheats when being in a relationship, there's indeed no reason to fear being cheated on.

    I think the idea of people seeing their partners as property is a lot more prevalent than you'd think. Jealousy (even if it's of previous partners) is a form of control. If you feel like you have to "share" your love with your partner's previous partners then you have a control issue. (Again, general "you," not you in particular.)
    Well, I'd say it depends on the form of jealousy. When others see your partner (you in general, not you particular) as hot and your partner feels flattered, I'd say there's no reason to freak out about that.

    But if your partner would flirt with others than you all the time and is consciously trying to attract others than you, don't you think jealousy would be justified?

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    Quote Originally Posted by AquaMilotic View Post
    Um... I'm giving bad reasons for why some people prefer virgins, not for being against casual sex...
    Let's be real here. If you prefer virgins, you're probably also against casual sex at least as far as your partner is concerned.

    Anyways, do you think it's fine if a person would never have casual sex himself, but isn't judgemental about others having casual sex?
    Of course it's fine. I don't tell other people what to do with their sex lives.


    Well, that depends. If a person cheated on his/her previous partner(s), I'd say the fear of being cheated on is justified.

    However, if someone has casual sex only when being single and never cheats when being in a relationship, there's indeed no reason to fear being cheated on.
    That's not what you suggested in your previous posts. If your partner has a cheating history, that's completely different from your partner having a history of casual sex and you just being paranoid.

    Well, I'd say it depends on the form of jealousy. When others see your partner (you in general, not you particular) as hot and your partner feels flattered, I'd say there's no reason to freak out about that.

    But if your partner would flirt with others than you all the time and is consciously trying to attract others than you, don't you think jealousy would be justified?
    Again, not at all what you suggested in your post. If your person is actively flirting with someone else and is consciously doing so (and you're not just overreacting), something needs to be worked out. If you're jealous of your partner's previous partners, you have control issues.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesky Persian View Post
    Let's be real here. If you prefer virgins, you're probably also against casual sex at least as far as your partner is concerned.
    That's true.

    Of course it's fine. I don't tell other people what to do with their sex lives.
    Thanks. I'm not judgemental about others having casual sex, but I just don't want sex without love myself, I'd never have one night stands, and too many people judge me for it and say I'm having way too strict morals about love and sex, saying that I should just be fine with having sex without a relationship. I'm glad you at least accept my mindset of not wanting to have sex without a relationship.

    That's not what you suggested in your previous posts. If your partner has a cheating history, that's completely different from your partner having a history of casual sex and you just being paranoid.
    Sorry. Then my last posts weren't clear, or were badly worded. Anyways, this is what I meant all the time:
    - people having casual sex when being single is fine, they can still be faithful when being in a relationship
    - cheating is unacceptable, and not wanting a relationship with someone because of a cheating history is perfectly normal.

    Again, not at all what you suggested in your post. If your person is actively flirting with someone else and is consciously doing so (and you're not just overreacting), something needs to be worked out. If you're jealous of your partner's previous partners, you have control issues.
    Again, then my other posts in this thread weren't clear, or were badly worded.
    Last edited by AquaMilotic; 6th April 2013 at 1:53 AM.

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    To be quite honest, it doesn't seem like your arguments were badly worded. It seemed like you changed your argument completely. Preference for virgins has nothing to do with a cheating partner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesky Persian View Post
    To be quite honest, it doesn't seem like your arguments were badly worded. It seemed like you changed your argument completely. Preference for virgins has nothing to do with a cheating partner.
    I didn't change arguments. I already said that people with a preference for virgins might be afraid of being cheated on, even though that fear isn't justified, I think I said that in my first and/or second post in this thread.

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    If it's not justified, it's not a good argument. You went on further to attempt to justify it by making up specific scenarios that had little to do with your original argument.

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    It shouldn't concern others whether you have multiple or a single sex partner..
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    Quote Originally Posted by happinas View Post
    It shouldn't concern others whether you have multiple or a single sex partner..

    If you intend on sleeping with this "other", they have every right to be concerned...........

    I do not agree with victim blaming and such. You have the right to do whatever you want with your body, but I think the issue is fairly simple to understand; promiscuity is risky and ill-advise.
    Last edited by WarriorPrince; 27th April 2013 at 2:56 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dj06 View Post
    If you intend on sleeping with this "other", they have every right to be concerned...........

    I do not agree with victim blaming and such. You have the right to do whatever you want with your body, but I think the issue is fairly simple to understand; promiscuity is risky and ill-advise.
    I agree. I feel like most 'young people' are generally ok with the idea of casual sex I mean some people would be surprised to know what goes on even in high schools(or maybe not) but when there someone who goes around sleeping with some rediculous amount of people I feel like others are naturally going to have negative outlooks(even more if you are female) on them even if it is just in the back of their mind just because of what society generally portrays to be 'bad' or 'good' I mean like if you are a girl like that everyone is going to call you a **** and if you are a guy girls are going to think you are some kind of sleezebag ya know. That is just how it has gotten to be I guess
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dj06 View Post
    If you intend on sleeping with this "other", they have every right to be concerned...........
    As has been said and will continue to be said, what really matters is that you are open and honest about your health status. How many partners you've had before is not a deep concern you need to share immediately with every person you intend to have sex with. Your health status, however, is.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dj06 View Post
    I do not agree with victim blaming and such. You have the right to do whatever you want with your body, but I think the issue is fairly simple to understand; promiscuity is risky and ill-advise.
    The number of people you have sex with is not going to affect you as long as all sex is consensual and safe. Having one-night stands with ten people isn't as risky as continuously having sex with one person if the ten people are all clean but the one person you've been sleeping with for years has STDs, STIs and HIV. However, once again, we are only discussing having safe, protected sex here, and when you use a condom, the risk is much, much lower.


    Quote Originally Posted by tokyo/seven View Post
    I agree. I feel like most 'young people' are generally ok with the idea of casual sex I mean some people would be surprised to know what goes on even in high schools(or maybe not) but when there someone who goes around sleeping with some rediculous amount of people I feel like others are naturally going to have negative outlooks(even more if you are female) on them even if it is just in the back of their mind just because of what society generally portrays to be 'bad' or 'good' I mean like if you are a girl like that everyone is going to call you a **** and if you are a guy girls are going to think you are some kind of sleezebag ya know. That is just how it has gotten to be I guess
    If the sex is consensual and safe, then what's the actual problem? If young people are being properly educated about sex, studies show that they will make better decisions and be safer if/when they do decide to have sex. Some other benefits of proper sex ed:
    Quote Originally Posted by http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/publications450
    • Behavioral outcomes have included delaying the initiation of sex as well as reducing the frequency of sex, the number of new partners, and the incidence of unprotected sex, and/or increasing the use of condoms and contraception among sexually active participants. Long-term impacts have included lower STI and/or pregnancy rates.
    • Evaluations of comprehensive sex education and HIV/ STI prevention programs show that they do not increase rates of sexual initiation, do not lower the age at which youth initiate sex, and do not increase the frequency of sex or the number of sex partners among sexually active youth.
    • Between 1991 and 2004, the U.S. teen birth rate fell from 62 to 41 per 1,000 female teens.
    And yes, a lot of people look down on people with X amount of sexual partners, but people also used to look down on homosexuals, and we are slowly changing that. We are coming to terms with the facts, which are that as long as what homosexuals do is consensual and safe, there is no reason to treat them differently. The same applies to how we treat people who have sex with multiple people. As we become more knowledgeable, our thought process and the way we treat people has to reflect that by evolving and improving.

    This includes judging people just because "omg they had X kind of sex with X number of people, but I think they should be having A kind of sex with B number of people instead."

    ~Psychic

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    Quote Originally Posted by Psychic View Post
    As has been said and will continue to be said, what really matters is that you are open and honest about your health status. How many partners you've had before is not a deep concern you need to share immediately with every person you intend to have sex with. Your health status, however, is.


    The number of people you have sex with is not going to affect you as long as all sex is consensual and safe.
    I'm not gonna address the progressiveness you spoke of because I feel like that's an entirely different issue in it's own right.

    I was particularly addressing his post. Therefore, when you take the context of the entire argument that has continuously looped this thread, my post is indeed inadequate. I'm aware of that because I wasn't directly addressing the entirety of the original post nor the subsequent ones. He made a definitive statement, and I simply pointed out that it could not be universalized. Each of your points are certainly stable, so I'm not gonna take this on another loop.

    I just have a question. Why can't you be concerned? If you're choosing a mate, why should it be considered narrow-minded if you take into account, or are just curious about their sexual history? Why shouldn't a person be able to limit their sexual encounters to those who had fewer sexual encounters without being considered unjust? Being 1 of 100, would feel a little weird to me.

    If they feel more comfortable about it, then let them be.

    Also, I was not justifying **** shaming by saying promiscuity was risky. I was being reasonable. Compared to celibacy, it is indeed risky behavior, and that's where the basis for judgement (albeit dogmatic) arises.

    Discussing the ethics of anything so controversial is a daunting task regardless due to the myriad of ethical approaches and the fact that any lack of brevity leaves too much room for ridiculously to transpire. Some atomist theories would shun this behavior. Other's would find it agreeable. The same goes for holism..... It's definitely not as clear cut as an issue as it's being made out to be.
    Last edited by WarriorPrince; 28th April 2013 at 7:41 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Psychic View Post


    If the sex is consensual and safe, then what's the actual problem? If young people are being properly educated about sex, studies show that they will make better decisions and be safer if/when they do decide to have sex. Some other benefits of proper sex ed:

    ~Psychic
    Well yeah exactly that is what I mean (I guess I was not clear as always l o l). It is not so much that the actual act of being with many many people is really all that bad it is more that society shows it to be something that is bad and it does not hurt to be wary of what people might think or say about you because of it.
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    sleeping with someone doesn't necessarily mean you're in a relationship with someone, and relationship wise, that just comes down to honesty whiwh is a different matter.
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    Quote Originally Posted by tokyo/seven View Post
    Well yeah exactly that is what I mean (I guess I was not clear as always l o l). It is not so much that the actual act of being with many many people is really all that bad it is more that society shows it to be something that is bad and it does not hurt to be wary of what people might think or say about you because of it.
    Society is ignorant. The reason people look down on others who have had multiple sex partners is generally because of idiotic reasons such as religion or jealousy (they wanna get it like the other person is).

    Do what you want as long as you are smart and safe about it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by BJPalmer85 View Post
    Society is ignorant. The reason people look down on others who have had multiple sex partners is generally because of idiotic reasons such as religion or jealousy (they wanna get it like the other person is).

    Do what you want as long as you are smart and safe about it.
    B
    Why would anyone be jealous of someone because of that? Have you ever heard of anyone ever being jealous because of something like that?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pokemon Whisperer Natural Harmonia Gropius View Post
    Why would anyone be jealous of someone because of that? Have you ever heard of anyone ever being jealous because of something like that?
    I was wondering the same thing. I don't think jealously is an accurate explanation, especially considering it was one of his "general" reasons as to why.

    And Happinas, I don't understand what/whom you are attempting to address. If it was to me (which doesn't seem to be the case), it doesn't even come remotely close to being an attempted response to the question I asked....
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